Author's Note:

I'm...feeling pretty tired and sleepy right now, so I won't be answering any reviews this time around. I usually respond to reviews after finishing each chapter, for those of you wondering. But no worries, I'll answer whatever you have for me next week. Just need to catch some Z's...


Episode 142: Bananas

For the very first time in the record label's history, Star Records found themselves in real jeopardy. And it was all because of one woman - Maiko Shimazaki.

For those of you unaware, Maiko Shimazaki used to the head of Fortuna Entertainment, the entertainment agency and production company Itsuki, Touma, and the idol singers used to work for until it fused with Star Records. Maiko was a very haphazard woman - while the former grauvere idol was efficient in presiding over Fortuna Entertainment, she also had quite a bit of a drinking problem, which typically got in the way of her job.

But now, with her personal demons seemingly in the past, Maiko was back and better than ever, desiring to reclaim the idol singers she had lost before. She had warned Fox and Falco about her plans, and now the pilots didn't know what to do, as they were pacing back and forth in the foyer.

"So, this is how you plan on handling the situation?" Itsuki asked the pilots, cool and collected as ever, as Fox and Falco continued to pace back and forth. "Just walk around fearing for the worst?"

"You know Maiko more personally than we do, maybe you should confront her, Itsuki," Fox said to the young man, before pulling on his ears. "If we don't do anything, we're majorly screwed..."

"Then why don't you two stop panicking and put some action into work? All this constant worrying isn't gonna make Maiko magically go away."

"Shut up Itsuki, we don't need your needless commentary," Falco snapped, putting Itsuki in his place. Or he would've done so, if Itsuki gave a crap. "We're just...getting our worry out of our systems, that's all. That way, uh, we can be prepared for Maiko!"

Fox: I find it very appreciative that Master Hand is taking the initiative to help us maintain our control from Star Records. He has never cared about the record label before, he only cared for the money. *pauses* But now that I think of it...

Master Hand: *laughs manically* Fox and Falco must be fools, if they seriously think I'm genuinely helping them keep their control of Star Records! Those stupid losers! I just want the money flow, and there's no telling how the income will shake up if this Maiko lady tries to take away my beloved children, the idol singers. They're the ones that really keep the ship afloat, while Little Mac and Knuckles are on the wayside.

Itsuki: Master Hand has been very...affectionate towards the idol singers, I've noticed. Just the other day, he called Tsubasa "baby", and even offered to assist Mamori with her homework, even though she doesn't go to school. In fact, I've haven't seen her go to school since we moved here! Which is a very bad sign. Could be my fault...

"How about we develop a plan, so we'll be actually prepared," suggested Itsuki, knowing that his idea will be shot down because he was spewing "needless commentary". Whatever that was supposed to mean. "We'll just show Maiko Star Records' bank statements, and convince her that we're doing fine and that she doesn't need to take away any of our talent."

"Counterpoint, Maiko will see how valuable the idol singers are, and will be more inclined to make them sign with her own record label," countered Fox, leading Itsuki to grunt and shake his head. "I think we should just knock her out, and send her to some third-world country so we won't see her again. Belgium sounds like a great spot."

"Didn't you say that Maiko has a drinking problem, or has had one?" Falco asked the young man, who was too reluctant to answer. Sometimes Falco had some very vivid and weird ideas. "I think we should make Maiko drunk, and then we can put her inside that bus Toad stole and..."

"No, no, no, that'll just make things even worse," frowned Itsuki, not on board with any of the pilots' plans for dealing with Maiko. Especially Falco's, his plan might violate moral codes. "We must keep things stagnant, not make it worse."

Just then, the doorbell rang, as Fox and Falco both stopped in place. Both pilots were scared for their lives, as they heard someone knock on the door. Could that be Maiko, did she finally arrive?

"Crap that must be her, we gotta hide!" panicked Fox, as he and Falco darted out of the foyer like they were the Flash. "If Maiko asks, tell her Falco we're both on hospice care! If she inquires about the illness, just make one up!"

"Would be coincidental to be on hospice care the week she shows up, don't you think?" asked Itsuki, but Fox and Falco wouldn't answer, for both of them were already gone. Itsuki sighed, as he went towards the door, as someone knocked on it again. Maiko must be very impatient. But when Itsuki opened the door...

...he saw not Maiko, but rather a female gorilla, wearing all pink. It was Donkey Kong's girlfriend, Candy Kong, and with her was her maid/servant, Mecha Sonic. Seemed like Candy wanted to pay her boyfriend a quick visit.

"I don't believe we've met before, have we?" asked Itsuki, as he kindly held out his hand. "Itsuki Aoi's the name - I'm one of the heads of Star Records. I'm sure you've heard of it before." Candy would shake Itsuki's hand, while Mecha Sonic looked on with contempt. Probably sizing up Itsuki.

"I've heard a little bit about Star Records from Donkey Kong, but only in spades..." replied Candy, as the handshake was over. "...I'm his girlfriend, Candy Kong. Say hello to Itsuki, Mecha Sonic! Aren't you gonna say anything?"

"Why should I say something to an inferior human?" questioned Mecha Sonic. The robot still had one hedgehog on his mind, and one hedgehog only...Sonic.

Mecha Sonic: I am back at the mansion, which means that I now have another chance at destroying Sonic for good...his demise will be as sweet as the tears flowing from his eyes when he's wracked with unspeakable pain...

"You must forgive Mecha Sonic, he really has a bit of a superiority complex," apologized Candy, but that didn't seem to faze Itsuki - the young man was more concerned about why Mecha Sonic was with Candy to begin with. "Donkey Kong gave me Mecha Sonic as a gift, by the way. He's my servant boy!"

"Stop calling me a servant boy, you stupid ape, or I'll kill you..." threatened Mecha Sonic; Candy always found it endearing whenever Mecha Sonic sent her death threats. Mainly because she knew the robot would never carry them out.

"Ah, okay, that clears things up a little," grinned Itsuki, who was now left wondering why Donkey Kong would gift Candy a murderous robot in Mecha Sonic. "How about I call DK for you? I have his contact info on my phone."


Unlike most other days, Donkey Kong was experiencing a bad hair day, and one of the worst bad hair days you could think of. The gorilla was in the bathroom, checking himself out in front of a mirror, and paying close attention to his hair.

His hair, needless to say, was mangled mess - had flakes, dead insects, and other things in it. Donkey Kong seldom washed his hair, or use hair gel, because in his very own words, "gorillas should never use human products". But now, DK just might have to adopt a new philosophy.

"This is bad, really bad..." fretted Donkey Kong, as he was combing the flakes out of his hair with a comb. No matter how hard he combed, or what method he used, the flakes remained in place, refusing to leave DK's hair. "I can't let anyone see this!"

"Tra la la, la la la la..." Cilan happily sang to himself, as he entered the bathroom. Donkey Kong detected the connoisseur's presence, and quickly covered his head, to conceal his hair. Cilan caught the gorilla in the act, and looked at him curiously. "What are you hiding atop of your head, Donkey Kong?"

"Oh, nothing, Cilan - totally not like I've trying to hide my hair...or anything," Donkey Kong sheepishly replied, before uncovering the top of his head to reveal his hair to Cilan. The connoisseur shrieked, reacting as if he accidentally encountered a woman changing her clothes.

"My goodness man, have you been sleeping in mud?! What in heaven's name happened to your hair? Not that I ever paid much attention to your hair in the first place, but it looks very...noticeable, today."

"I...just haven't been taking care of my hair as much as I should. Thought I could get away since I'm a gorilla, but sadly I thought wrong...I can't let anyone else see me in the state I'm in. Do you have a hat I can borrow?"

"You can borrow my detective's hat, I always use it whenever I'm on the hunt looking for clues." Cilan dug into his pocket, and pulled out a detective's hat, giving it to Donkey Kong. "What with Layton and Luke around, I don't really have much use for that hat..."

"Ooh, it fits perfectly!" Donkey Kong looked at himself in the mirror, with the detective's hat on. "Thanks a ton Cilan, I'll make sure to return your hat once my bad hair day is over with." Now blessed with confidence, Donkey Kong strolled out of the bathroom, as Cilan gave a faint smile.

Cilan: Never asking DK for my hat back. Ever. He contaminated it, as far as I'm concerned. Besides, I don't need that stupid hat anyway - me being a detective, it's just a part of a phase...or is it? I might've done it on a television show...meh, could've been just a dream.

Now that he was wearing the detective's hat, Donkey Kong was perfectly comfortable with walking around the mansion, without being judged. As the gorilla was walking, he felt a sudden vibration, near his thigh.

"Wondering what that vibrating sound is..." wondered Donkey Kong, as he reached towards his thigh and pulled out his cellphone from his fur. It was buried deep, too' DK's fur made for excellent storage space. "...my phone, of course! So that's what caused the vibrating!" DK quickly answered the phone. "Hello?"

"About time you answered the phone, Donkey Kong..." Itsuki was heard from DK's cellphone. Sounded very, very annoyed. "I've been calling you a gazillion times right now. Sure know how to hold a man up, don't ya?"

"Not my fault I don't have any pockets. Sometimes my fur can really come in handy. So what's up? Force Five needs a new villain to appear on their show? Is Ridley not enough for you guys?"

"Your girlfriend, Candy Kong, just showed up a few moments ago." The moment Donkey Kong heard Candy's name, his eyes bulged out, as he panicked. He couldn't afford to let his girlfriend see his bad hair. "She said she wanted to pay you a visit. You game?"

"Unfortunately I can't come..." Donkey Kong would leave it as it is right there, but he had to provide an excuse. "...because, uh, I have the cramps! Now you might think I'm making it up, but really...OOOOOWWW, CRAMP, MY LEG, MY LEG IS CRAMPING!" Donkey Kong looked around, ensuring that nobody was in the hallway watching him spaz out. The coast was clear.

"Um...those were some very unconvincing sounds you made. Hardly sounded natural! Well, Candy will be down in the living room with her 'servant', Mecha Sonic, once you're man enough to speak with her. Make sure you don't keep me waiting."

"Crap, why did Candy have to bring that robot with her..." Donkey Kong ought to give Sonic a heads up, before Mecha Sonic destroyed the hedgehog. "...okay then, just tell her I'm busy, and I'll see her soon."

'You better see her soon...she's really gotten aggravating. And her robot just won't stop staring at me. Just show up or something, before I have to...I don't know what I'll do. Please come..."

"Will do." Donkey Kong ended the phone call, left at a crossroads. As much as he would want to speak with Candy, his hair was still a mangled mess, and Candy seeing him wear that detective's hat would lead to some instigating by the female Kong. There was only one thing the gorilla could do...ask his nephew, Diddy, for advice.

Donkey Kong would return to his room, where he saw Diddy and Pit near the window, tossing water balloons outside. At Link's poor postman. That guy could never catch a break at the mansion, can he?

"Couldn't you boys just throw water balloons from, I don't know, the roof of the mansion?" Donkey Kong asked Pit and Diddy, as the postman was heard screaming and running away. So much the poor guy could handle.

"Eh, we would, but Mega Man told us the roof is off-limits for hurling water balloons," explained Pit, acting like he was giving Donkey Kong information he was expected to know already. "But he never said we could do the same thing from our rooms!"

Postman: I've had it up to here with those mansion dorks...first they pelt me with water balloons, then they try to feed me to some giant shark swimming in their lake, and they even had the gall to critique my outfit! I mean, what else am I supposed to wear, pants?! Those imbeciles...at this rate, I should just have Beedle deliver Link's mail...

"Hey DK, why the heck are you wearing a detective's hat?" Diddy asked his uncle out of strange curiosity. "Are you joining Layton and Luke? Didn't even think about asking me if I wanted to join, did you?!"

"I'm not becoming a detective, Diddy - I'm just trying to conceal my bad hair," replied Donkey Kong, who believed the hat fitted him nicely. In another life, DK would've been a better detective than Detective Pikachu. "Candy is here, and I can't let her see my hair!"

"Pfft, your hair can't be that bad..." scoffed Pit, only for Donkey Kong to take off his detective's hat and reveal his hair to the angel, who was left mortified. "FOR ALL THAT IS HOLY, PLEASE PUT YOUR HAT BACK ON, MAN!"

"Is my hair really that bad?" wondered Donkey Kong, as he placed his detective's hat back on his head. "Man, I shouldn't even come see Candy today...might as well keep her waiting until she gets bored and leave. But then, I'll never hear the end of it..."

"Have you tried giving Candy an excuse?" asked Diddy, not wanting to see his uncle punk out. That wasn't something he knew Donkey Kong for. "You should tell Candy that you have a termite infection, and being in bed rest will make the infection go away! It worked wonders when I used it on Dixie. Or you can just say that you have tendinitis. That'll work too."

"It might've worked on Dixie, but I doubt it'll work on Candy...she's the kind of gall that will keep instigating until she finds out what's going on. Knowing her, she'll probably march up to this room, and drag me to the living room so we can chit chat. Or she'll order Mecha Sonic to do the job for her..."

"You mean that robot dude that chased down Sonic that one time?" Pit asked Donkey Kong, who nodded his head. The angel remembered the chase scene very fondly. "I wished I could be chased around like that...must've been tons of fun."

"If Candy is really gonna hunt you down, then we ought to leave the mansion, pronto," suggested Diddy; he knew this idea wasn't the most popular one, but he wished to preserve his father's dignity. "Candy won't find you then!"

"Even if I did leave, that woman will still find me somehow!" frowned Donkey Kong, unsure of what he was supposed to do. He was really stuck in a no-win situation. "Must you insist on overlooking how Candy operates?"

"You know, Candy won't find you if you were hiding in the perfect spot..." Pit stroked his chin, leaving Donkey Kong nervous that he would have to depend on the angel for help. "...why don't we hide in the movie room? That way, you can be entertained AND be hidden form Candy, at the same time!"

"The movie room, as a hiding spot? I don't know Pit, it sounds pretty out in the open. What will we do when Candy starts searching for me? Last thing I would wanna do is make her angry..."

"We'll just lock the door to the movie room - blockade it a little, to be safe. As for dealing with Candy, I'll get my main man Kirby to keep her busy. He could just suck her up, and spit her out of the mansion and keep her there."

"And that'll make her the angriest gorilla on earth...I'm not so sure this is such a good idea, Pit. But alas, I've left with very little options..."

Pit: There's a reason why I chose to hide in the movie room...there was this show I watched in there last week, and it had Donkey Kong and Diddy and King K. Rool and everyone else. Thought the Kongs might like it, so I'm gonna show them the show today. What better way to hide from your girlfriend, then to watch a television series crafted in your likeness...with that being said, I probably deserved my own show a long time ago.


A new football season was about to start, and nobody was more excited than Link. The Hylian, who only liked the Philadelphia Eagles just because their primary team color was green, was all ready to go, as he had the living room decked with Eagles gear. Even though kickoff was only hours away.

What made Link more excited about the start of the season than usual was that he had a fellow Link incarnation in Champion Link to join him in his Eagles fandom. Link spent much of his time convincing Champion Link to be an Eagles fan, telling him that the Eagles were a historically great franchise with dozens of titles and had the nicest, most considerate fanbase in all of sports. Yes, both of these things were extremely untrue, but hey, at least Link made a new fan!

"Why on earth was this hanging up in your closet?" Champion Link questioned Link, who was adjusting the couches in the living room. Champion Link was holding up a #11 Eagles jersey, while sporting a curious face.

"It's a part of my wardrobe, duh," replied Link, after he was done moving the couches around. It was probably the sixth or so time he done it - the Hylian was really striving for perfection. "Sometimes I like to wear it in public, to make people feel salty and jealous inside. You should do the same."

"But what's the point, it's not like you're the player himself. This seems like a sneaky way for the Eagles and the football league to steal your money...pigs sure love to get slaughtered, I'm telling you."

"Dude, you're looking way too far into this - fans buying jerseys is not some grand money-scheming act. People just love to live vicariously through their favorite players, by wearing their jerseys. Seriously, you should try that jersey on right now. Might give you special powers!"

"I highly doubt it will..." Champion Link gently placed the Eagles jersey on the nearby sofa, as Cloud entered the living room. He saw how decorated it was, and was left judging Link mightily.

"I really wonder where your head leads you to sometimes," the swordsman told Link, as he took a seat in a couch...only for Link to move said couch to another spot in the living room. As a result, Cloud landed on the floor.

"Uh, that wasn't intentional, my fault," Link apologized to his best friend, as he moved the couch to the nearest wall. The Hylian even measured the distance between the wall and the couch, to be precise. Every little detailed counts. "Though you should've been a bit more aware of your surroundings."'

"A lot of Eagles stuff you got in the living room, Link," Cloud looked around and saw how decked out the living room was. Felt like he was in the house of a diehard Eagles fan, rather than being at the Smash Mansion. "You're gonna leave room for some Falcons decorations, aren't you?"

"I beg your pardon?" Link gave a questioning look at Cloud, just when he was about to move Champion Link out of the way...just so he could move the sofa. He was even holding the Hylian in his arms.

"Eagles aren't the only playing team playing tonight, you know. Have you forgotten about the Falcons? Falco's team? You should save the guy some trouble, and decorate this living room with red and..."

"Ah, screw that man, he was doubting his own fanhood after that Super Bowl a year ago. I can't stand fickle fans like him...bet he can't even name the star quarterback's name, let alone pronounce it. Only likes the Falcons because they're birds...pitiful."

Falco: *hiding in a closet with Fox* Crap I forgot the game comes in tonight...I sure hope to get this whole hubbub with Maiko resolved in time for kickoff. I can't afford to miss the opener.
Fox: Why do you wanna watch the game for? To be reminded of how disappointed you'll feel for the rest of the season?...Please don't hurt me.
Falco: Eh, you know what? I've been victimized far too many times as a Falcon fan, that I'm not even mad at that remark anymore. I should just get used to failure, from now on. The again, you have no right to talk... *stifles laughter* ...Jets fan.
Fox: I just love teams with flying vehicle motifs, is that so bad?! One day we'll see our day, one day...

Near the living room was Mario, who was spying on Link while taking notes on a notepad. The plumber looked angry, salty even, as he was doing his note taking, and his brow furrowed with every note he took.

"Mario why are we here, I thought you said we would be doing something fun today!" Bowser Jr. whispered to the plumber, joined by Iggy and Morton. The three Koopalings were promised fun by Mario, but said fun had yet to take place.

"We are doing some-a thing fun today...but before we get-a to fun, we must-a do work," stated Mario, as he was finishing up his diligent note taking. "Work always comes-a before fun. That's the way life-a works."

"Definitely not what our dad told us..." remarked Morton, as he folded his arms. Sounded like Bowser had his priorities out of wack, as a father. Those poor Kooalings, they're gonna be so ruined when they're all grown up...

"Aaaaaaand...done!" Once Mario was done with his notes, he placed his notepad in his pocket, and led the Koopalings away from the living room. "Alright-a boys, back to my house-a we go! Time to kick-a start our master plan into action!"

"Got a real bad feeling about this..." Iggy quietly said to the other Koopalings, who both shared similar sentiments as Mario led them away.


Mario returned to his home along with Bowser Jr, Iggy, and Morton, and once he entered his house, he saw Lara being Lara, as the blunette was playing around with a device in the living room. The kind of device one shouldn't play around with.

"LARA FOR THE LAST TIME-A THAT THING IS NOT A TOY!" shouted Mario, as he ran to Lana and snatched the device out of her hand. It was an electric lighter - one bad move by Lara, and she could very well burn Mario's house down. Better hope she had enough money to pay rent. "How many times do I have-a to tell you?"

"Why do you have that lighter in the first place, Mario?" asked Lara, leaving the plumber stumped. Of course, it would be customary for Mario to have a lighter, given that fire was a strong motif of his, but why did he have said lighter to begin with.

"It's...it's a weapon of defense, Lara. Works-a much like a gun. Just point it at some-a one, and they'll be scared-a for their life and will leave-a you alone. Fire can easily strike-a fear in a person."

"What a copycat..." frowned Bowser Jr., who adopted the same philosophy. Or at least learned it from his father, Bowser.

Bowser Jr: I personally find it somewhat insulting that Mario has been trying to be like a father figure to me, after all those years he spent terrorizing my dad over Peach. I know this has been said before, but Mario's the real villain - tossing dads into lava, killing sentiment mushrooms, and worst of all, spamming bananas in kart race! And while it's okay for a fire-breathing turtle to breathe fire...would it be acceptable for someone like Mario to throw fireballs all willy-nilly? Mario is a walking arsonist, I tell you, he should be behind bars where he belongs!

"Allow-a me to show you," demonstrated Mario, as he turned on his lighter, and shoved it into Lana's face. The blunette screamed for her life, as she jumped away in sheer fright. "See what-a I mean? It's the art-a of intimidation..."

"Could've at least warned me..." frowned Lana, who clearly was not prepared in the slightest - although to be fair, Mario did give her a heads up. Soon Peach and Zelda came down from the stairs, the latter holding Jennifer.

"Mario, are you trying to scare Lana with that lighter again?" Zelda questioned the plumber, who quickly placed the lighter behind his back. "Don't even act like we can't see what's in your hands..."

"I wasn't trying to scare-a Lana - Lana was just-a screaming in awe of how big-a the flame was," replied Mario, posing himself as innocent. "One-a day Jennifer will wield-a my lighter with grace! Provided she's unable to develop-a fire powers."

"Hopefully she'll develop her own powers soon..." remarked Peach, wondering why her husband had a lighter at all. "So! What exciting things do you have planned for the Koopalings today? A game of catch outside, I assume?"

"No game-a of catch today, heard enough-a of Lemmy crying his eyes out last-a time I did that...but mark-a my words, Princess Peach, today's activities will involve-a some football. Just me and these three-a boys behind me..."

"Aw, that sounds swell! Phew, for a minute there I was worried you would make the three do something silly, like sabotage Link because his team won the Super Bowl and yours didn't...you like the Cowboys, don't you?"

"Peach I'm-a insulted...have you forgotten?! I'm a Giants fan!" Peach, realizing her horrible mistake, covered her mouth in fear - fearful that Mario might put her on blast for her mistake. But thankfully Mario knew how to forgive and forget. "But the Cowboys, it's a good-a guess I suppose."

"So that's why you have that blue and red stuff hanging in your closet...I should've known." You sure that blue and red stuff isn't Mario's extra pairs of overalls, Peach? But sure, let's go with "blue and red". "Have fun out there, you three!"

"Will do!" Mario gave a thumbs up to Peach, who smiled as she returned upstairs to her room. Once the princess was gone, Mario took the Koopalings to the nursery, so he could meet with the three youngsters in private. "Alright-a boys, you ready for Mission: Sabotage?"

"Did we really have to meet in the nursery room?" asked Bowser Jr, as he was holding his nose in disgust. "Smells like diapers in here..."

"I would meet in my-a room, but Peach and Jennifer have-a already occupied that space. Anyways, are you boys-a ready for Mission: Sabotage?"

"This secret meeting sucks already, where is the food?!" frowned Morton, as he was throwing a small fit. "I refuse to think logically about secret plans without some grub in my tum!"

"I don't have any time-a in the world to prepare you food. Fix some lunch-a yourself. Now, who's ready for Mission: Sabotage?"

"Oh man, I'm gonna miss my favorite show..." fretted Iggy, as he took a grief glance at his watch. "Can we please hurry this meeting up..."

"I SAID FOR THE LAST TIME, ARE YOU READY FOR MISSION: SABOTAGE!"

Mario was so angry, that he didn't even use his Italian accent while screaming. Nevertheless, he was able to grab the attention of Bowser Jr. and company, who were both shivering in their timbers.

"Yes, we are ready," replied Bowser Jr, meekly as he knew know.

Peach: Did I just hear Mario yell something about "sabotage"? *frowns* No, it can't be...he must've said succotash instead. Mario really is a pro at mispronouncing the easiest of words.

"Our mission today, whether you choose-a to accept it or not, is to sabotage Link and his-a plans for watching the opening game," Mario told the Koopalings, vowing to make Link suffer. You'd think that since Mario's team was more accomplished historically than Link's, the plumber wouldn't be so bothered by some measly Super Bowl win. "Do you know what we must-a do?"

"Accept the fact that Link's team is better than yours, and that your team will win another championship another day?" asked Iggy, leading to a questionable lglare from Mario. Not the kind of answer Mario expected, nor wanted.

"No, what we must do is find-a the perfect time to start our mayhem. I've taken some-a notes, so you can read-a over them and generate some ideas-a for harassing our favorite Hylian." Mario took out his notepad, and handed it to the Koopalings. "Link is-a going to pay..."


Obviously Donkey Kong couldn't let Candy wait forever on him, which is why Pit had sent his BFF Kirby out to keep the gorilla entertained. The pink puffball found Candy and Mecha Sonic in the living room, with Candy on her cellphone, and Mecha Sonic serving as her bodyguard, while also being on the lookout for Sonic.

"Hello, Candy Kong, Mecha Sonic," greeted Kirby, as he approached the two. Candy smiled, whereas Mecha Sonic felt agitated, unable to forget what Kirby had done to him in episode 43. "Kirby here."

"And hello to you, you precious little thing..." Candy would return the favor, easily taken back by how cute and adorable Kirby was. Mecha Sonic begged to differ. "...I forgot you could talk now. Though that voice doesn't fit you..."

"True, but it's a Dynatox device, so I have to take what I can get. It is quite useful for making prank calls. Even if it comes at the cost of running up our phone bill. But Master Hand pays for it, so..."

"Uh huh...anyways, have you seen my boyfriend around, Donkey Kong? Told him I'd visit him today. He better not be a no-show, not after all the time I..."

"Yes, Donkey Kong, he can't be here unfortunately." This made Candy very angry, as she frowned intensely at Kirby, staring deep into his soul. "I mean, he can't be here yet...because he's out looking for a gift!"

"A gift, for me? Aw, how sweet! In that case, he can take all the time he needs. As long as the gift is...serviceable. Better not be anything banana-related, I have enough banana murals at my home. And banana clocks, and banana kitchen mats, and banana hand towels..."

Candy: I'm just like another Kong, I tell you, got a bunch of banana-themed belongings at my house that I don't know what to do with... *pauses* ...though I shouldn't be doting on the Kongs, by establishing myself as one of them. Even though I'm technically a part of the family, despite dating Donkey Kong...how is that even possible...?

Walking by the living room eating his chili dog was none other than Sonic, who peered inside the living room and saw Kirby. He also saw Candy and Mecha Sonic, the latter finally seeing his prey in full sight.

"There you are..." said Mecha Sonic, as he took one step forward towards Sonic, who backed away. "...I've been waiting for you, Sonic..."

"Aw shucks, not today..." frowned Sonic, as he continued to back away from Mecha Sonic, who was following him. "Why does it have to be me? Why can't you just kill someone like Gil instead? At least Gil never puts up a fight. Unless you pay him enough, that is."

"Mecha Sonic, where do you think you're going?" Candy frowned at her servant, who ignored her completely. Whenever it came to Sonic, Mecha Sonic tuned out everything so he could focus on his number one prey. "You're supposed to be waiting on Donkey Kong, with me!"

"Shut up, you bimbo!" retorted Mecha Sonic, making Candy gasp, before returning his attention to Sonic. "For more than a year, I've been waiting for this moment...and now, I can see that it's time..."

"Look man, you don't have to kill me, okay?" Sonic tried his best to appease Mecha Sonic, while he was being chased down. "I haven't even written my will yet, for crying out loud! And I've yet to tie up the knot with Amy. Why you wanna kill me before I could experience personal happiness?"

"Your personal happiness means nothing to be..." Mecha Sonic soon had Sonic cornered at a wall in the foyer. The robot then held up his hand, charging up a beam. "Say your last words, you pathetic hedgehog..." And that's when an idea spurred in Sonic's mind.

"Wait Mecha Sonic, wait just a minute!" Obeying Sonic, Mecha Sonic discharged his beam, as he lowered his hand. "What if I told you...that there's someone in this mansion that's more deserving of being killed than I am?"

"Who could possibly be more deserving than you? Is it someone you love, someone you hold dear? I demand to know who this person is..."

"The person I speak of...happens to be royalty." Uh oh, it was becoming nigh apparent who Sonic was referring to...but nonetheless, he got Mecha Sonic intrigued, as the robot was rubbing his chin in interest.

"Is this person of royalty, a prince?" asked Mecha Sonic; Sonic mulled over the answer, before giving a shrug. "No matter, this person will meet their end shortly..."

Sonic: Mecha Sonic and I are on the same page, working together...never thought I'd say that in a million years. Don't know how long this partnership will last, but as long as our target is killed, and I'm still alive, it's all good!


With Kirby keeping Candy contained in the living room, Pit and the Kongs were chilling in the movie room, with the door locked and closed shut. Donkey Kong and Diddy were already in their seats, as Pit was booting up a show on the big screen.

"You fellas are gonna like this show, I can guarantee it..." the angel smiled, once he found the show he was looking for. He pressed the play button, and sat in the sofa in between Donkey Kong and Diddy. Soon the show started...

...and the first thing that appeared on the screen was the title, Donkey Kong Country, accompanied by the theme music. Sounded very tropical and jungle-like.

"Heeeey hooo, look out down below! Donkey Kong's banana slamma!" Those were the very lyrics to the theme song, which were followed by some instrumental music. Pit was fairly delighted, whereas the Kongs were cringing.

"The heck is a 'banana slamma'?" Diddy raised an eyebrow; that phrase from the theme song stuck out to the spidermonkey the most. "Sounds like a rejected wrestling finisher to me."

"My goodness, what is this crap we're watching?!" frowned Donkey Kong, offended and triggered by what his eyes were subjected to. "Why do I look like a goofball?Who's that female gorilla chick? Is that supposed to be Dixie? Why are we riding in an airplane? Why is Funky Kong naked? Who's that gorilla with the mustache? Does Cranky Kong look younger than usual? And why is King K. Rool smaller?! Pit, I demand answers!"

"I dunno why you're so angry for, DK - it's your show, Donkey Kong Country!" exclaimed Pit; Donkey Kong refused to refer to the show as such. He imagined Donkey Kong Abridged was a more fitting name. "What's not to love about it?"

"Everything..." Donkey Kong folded his arms, soon glad that the theme song was now over. "Watching this isn't ideal, but I have no other choice..."


Back to the foyer, where Ema walked through the foyer when she heard the doorbell ring. The forensics expert, being the dutiful resident she was, answered the front door, and saw a woman standing on the porch.

"Hello ma'am, how may I help you?" Ema asked the woman - wearing white striped button-up shirt, a blue blazer, black zipper mini skirt and white high heels. Also had some red glasses and golden necklaces, to complete her look.

"Maiko Shimazaki, at your service..." the woman held her hand out to Ema, who shook it immediately. "Former head of Fortuna Entertainment, in Japan. Your name, please?"

"E-Ema Skye, forensics expert." Maiko found herself furrowing her brow after hearing Ema's response. "I'm not a fighter, per se, I just kinda live here...it's a very, very long story, trust me."

"They'll let in just about anyone inside that mansion, will they..." Trying to take Maiko's comment with stride, Ema gave a faint smile. "Certainly you know Fox McCloud and Falco Lombardi, right? May I speak with them?"

"Of course you can, just come on inside. Make yourself at home, while I go find those two..."

Fox: How long are we gonna hide in this closet?
Falco: We'll hide until dinner. People always make a big deal whenever there's an empty chair at the dinner table. Happens to Ashley all the time.
Fox: Yeah that sounds like a good plan. Sure hope someone like Ema will bid us time and... *closet door opens* ...who goes there? Ema?
Ema: Alright boys, time's up! *grabs Fox and Falco by the ear and drags them out* Someone wants to speak with you!
Falco: No Ema, the person you speak of could be evil! *clasps hands together* Please don't be Maiko, please don't be Maiko, please don't be Maiko...

Maiko: Fox and Falco honestly believed they could get away with taking my idol singers, the singers I've groomed to become stars, didn't they? *laughs* Well they have another thing coming...I've conquered the modeling industry, and I've also conquered my drinking problem, and now I'm ready to...ooh, looks like Fox and Falco are here! Never mind...

Ema dragged Fox and Falco to the foyer, and placed them in front of the smiling Maiko. So much for hiding...

"Fox McCloud, Falco Lombardi," Ema introduced the pilots, pointing at Fox and Falco respectively. Both pilots were glaring at the forensics expert. "Famed space pilots, and heads of a record label called Star Records."

"Trust me honey, I already know what Star Records is..." remarked Maiko, still smiling, as she stood up over Fox and Falco. Not wanting to feel overpowered, Fox and Falco stood up real quick. "...I know Star Records very well.

"Ema you traitor, you were supposed to protect us!" Fox frowned at the forensics expert, not sure if he and Falco could ever trust her again. Working for an evil group in secret, sure that could be forgiven. But taking you to someone who wished to take away your clients? That was an entirely different beast.

"Honestly you never told me to do anything," replied Ema, as Fox glared down the forensics expert one more time before redirecting his attention to Maiko. The former model licked her lips deceptively, ready to take back what she believed was rightfully hers.

"Obviously this isn't the best place for discussing business...so why don't you take me to your office?" Maiko asked Fox and Falco, who had their fists clenched. No way they would give up their idol singers to Maiko without a fight.


Donkey Kong, Diddy, and Pit were watching the first few minutes of the Donkey Kong show, and so far, DK was not liking what he was seeing. Not only did the gorilla dislike the animation, but he also disliked the voice actor who played him. Thought he sounded too urban for his taste.

But if Donkey Kong didn't like that, then he ain't seen nothing yet...as he was watching a scene involving him, Rool, Rool's general Klump, and the female gorilla Donkey Kong spoke of earlier.

"Who is that woman with the hot pants on?" Donkey Kong asked Pit, as he pointed at the screen. "Why does it look like she has lip injections?"

"I believe that is how Candy looks in the show," replied Pit; Donkey Kong looked at Candy in disbelief, then back at Pit, then back at Candy. He would repeat this multiple times.

"Well she might be Candy, but she definitely isn't better than MY Candy, if you know what I mean..."

"I beg to differ..." Diddy said quietly, as Donkey Kong looked at his nephew questionably. "...agree to disagree man. Agree to disagree..."

Diddy: Hey, I'd take red-haired Candy over fake blonde Candy any day of the week. At least the Candy in the show filled out nicely.


Everything was perfect in the living room, for Link. The furniture was in place, the banners were in place, and the television was in the right spot. All Link had to do know was wait for the game...which was still hours away. So why not kill time?

"Gotta prepare the appetizers!" the Hylian proclaimed, as he ran into the kitchen. Moments after he was gone, Mario and his three Koopalings sneaked their way inside the living room, and Mario would feel disgusted.

"So much-a green, it hurts my eyes..." the plumber shielded his eyes, before sucking it up eventually. "...let's start by taking down-a the flags and banners. Take dow each-a and every one of them!"

"Yes sir!" said Bowser Jr. as he, Iggy, and Morton helped Mario take down the banners and flags. The living room walls were literally covered with them. While the four were doing their thing, Iggy was on the lookout for Link.

"Uh oh, Link's returning to the living room!" the Koopaling informed the others, before they darted away and hid. Link would return to the living room, and was astonished to see his banners and flags, all gone.

"My Eagles stuff has gone missing, huh?" the Hylian stroked his chin, wondering how that could be, before shrugging. "Good thing I still have some other crud in my room! Hopefully Cloud didn't move it." Link would return to the kitchen, as Mario and company arose from their hiding spot.

"Darn it, I wanted to make-a Link feel some type of way..." frowned Mario, snapping his fingers in disgust. Not the kind of reaction he wanted from Link. "We should try and break-a the television next."


Although she loved Berkut very, very much, one major gripe Rinea had with her husband was that he seldom had fun. Berkut was more concerned about improving his status and worth than letting loose. Rinea wished to change that today, by having - or in this case, forcing - Berkut do fun activities together. "Funtivities", as someone like Mario would call it.

"I'll never understand why humans conform themselves to such stupid games..." moaned Berkut, as he and Rinea teamed up against Simon and Richter in a game of table soccer. The paladin wasn't doing a single thing, making Rinea do all the work. And the poor noblewoman was getting dominated by the Belmonts.

"Yes, another goal - seventeen to nothing!" cheered Simon, as he scored a goal to increase his team's score. He and Richter celebrated by bumping their chests, with Simon missing ever so slightly. They were still working on it.

Richter: Simon and I have been teaching each other lingo and mannerisms, so we can become one with the modern world. I tried to give Simon what is called a "dap" (Sonic showed me the ropes), and the man accused me of being in a vampire cult. I think I'd have better success with Simon if I could somehow curb his bloodlust for vampires. It'll take me years, though.

"Could you please help me out, Berkut?" Rinea called out to her husband, who was standing as far away from the soccer table as possible. He was looking in the distance, not paying any attention. "I can't do this all by myself!"

"You were the one who dragged me to this place, so it's only fitting that you do all the work," replied Berkut, not even giving his wife any eye contact. He was that angry with her. "You call this 'fun'?"

"Everyone else thinks it's fun, so why can't you think the same way? People always say that you're a pretty boring person in general..." Berkut could only scoff in response, before shaking his head.

"Let those peons believe what they want to believe. If my standards for high living are deemed 'boring' in their eyes, then they really don't understand the true meaning of sophistication..."

Rinea grunted, as she returned to her table soccer match with the Belmonts. Sonic and Mecha Sonic were standing at the gaming room entrance, both staring down their prey.

"You see that loser over there?" Sonic asked Mecha Sonic, as he pointed at Berkut, still staring into the distance. "That man is Berkut, a paladin from Rigel, and he wants to assassinate a ruler and take over the throne!"

"Shouldn't we just destroy this ruler instead?" questioned Mecha Sonic, who didn't view Berkut all that worthy of being destroyed. His might mind change after hearing Berkut's social standing, however. "Destroying a paladin wouldn't be as effective..."

"True dat, but Berkut might kill the ruler guy before you could! Would you honestly want that to happen?" No, Mecha Sonic did not want that to happen, after thinking Sonic's question through. "That's why you're here, to bring an end to Berkut!"

"I see...and what about the lass with the blue hair?" Amusingly, Mecha Sonic found Rinea more worthy to die than Berkut. Maybe the robot just hated anyone who had the color blue. Quite ironic. "Should I destroy her too?"

"Eh, she married Berkut, so I guess she can die as well. Make her pay for choosing the wrong soulmate. Now, how are you going to kill Berkut? Gonna kill him up close, or go for a sneak attack?"

"I believe a sneak attack will be our best option..." Mecha Sonic held up his hand, and charged a beam from it. He then aimed his hand at Berkut, and steadied it at Berkut, staring the paladin down...

...before firing the beam at the paladin. Berkut saw the beam coming with the corner of his eye, and ducked out of the way, as the beam struck a wall where Crash and Mewtwo were at. The beam left some soot on the wall, and Crash licked it, like it was a lollipop.

"What on earth..." questioned Mewtwo, as the beam grabbed everyone's attention in the gaming room. Everyone looked towards the gaming room entrance, and saw Sonic standing by. "Sonic, was that you? And who's that robot?"

"Crap, we've been caught!" panicked Sonic, as he quickly grabbed Mecha Sonic and bolted away. "Knew we should've went in close for the kill..."


Let's see if the Kongs were enjoying that Donkey Kong show...right now, there was a scene where Donkey Kong and Dixie were seated on a log, just having a normal conversation. Unbeknownst to them, a blue Kremling named Krusha was spying on them both.

"I used to hang out with my girl...but that's history," the Donkey Kong in the show said to Dixie, before looking down at the ground despondently. Donkey Kong still did not appreciate how his character sounded.

Donkey Kong: Not trying to ruffle any feathers, but why did every single character in that show sound black?

"Aw, you'll hook up with somebody, DK!" smiled Dixie, as Krusha appeared, popping out of a tree behind Donkey Kong and Dixie. The Kremling quietly laughed to himself, ready to make Donkey Kong's life miserable.

"Hey, what about you, Dixie?" Krusha said to the spidermonkey, somehow able to replicate Donkey Kong's voice. Krusha must be a master impersonator or something. "Little Dixie Doodle! You are fine..."

"Huh?" Dixie's eyes widened, as she turned to face Donkey Kong...in the show. The Donkey Kong in the movie room was feeling slighted. "Hey, what is up with you?!"

"Oh man, here comes the best part..." snickered Pit, as he was covering his mouth. After Dixie let out a "hmph!", it was time for Krusha to display more of impersonation his magic...

"Come on...put a lip lock on me, Dixie!" the Kremling said to Dixie, while sounding like Donkey Kong. Dixie's eyes grew wider than ever. "That chump chimp Diddy will never know!" Now Diddy found himself snickering along with Pit; Donkey Kong remained at edge.

"You lousy, double-crossing, two-timing...wait until Diddy gets a load of this!" Dixie hopped off the log and angrily marched away. Pit and Diddy were unable to take it anymore, as the two burst out laughing.

"I don't like this show, it's making me look stupid!" frowned Donkey Kong, who didn't know if he could stomach this show anymore. "Why are the creators trying to to make that Donkey Kong a dumber version of me?"

"To be fair, it's hard to tell the difference between you both," replied Pit, earning a death glare from Donkey Kong. "I was kidding, I was kidding!"

"Like you have any room to talk, idiot boy..."


Mario and the three Koopalings had just finished deconstructing the television in the living room, breaking it down to every last nut and bolt. Candy and Kirby watched the four, both with judging faces.

"Sooooo you're gonna buy us a new television, Mario?" Kirby asked the plumber, wondering how much flak Mario would receive for his actions. Same goes for the three Koopalings. "Because that one was pretty expensive..."

"In due time, Kirby, in due-a time," replied Mario, though it was hard to tell if he was being serious or not. Making Link feel miserable was currently the plumber's MO.

Mario: Link has become just-a like Daisy after she got married, becoming only slightly overbearing after getting a ring. Technically, Link-a never got a ring, as he's not a foot-a ball player, but it'll be the only ring-a he'll be seeing if he doesn't cool-a his jets...

"Link is returning to the living room - I repeat, Link is returning to the living room!" Iggy alerted Mario and company, as the four gathered up the pieces of the television and ran back to their hiding spot. Link returned to the living room, frowning and folding his arms when he saw the television missing.

"Someone stole the television, huh?" the Hylian analyzed the situation, before shrugging his shoulders. "Guess I'll just have to bring my own TV! If Cloud lets me." Link whistled a happy tune to himself, as he returned to the kitchen while Mario and company arose from their hiding spot.

"Come to think of it, just hiding the television would've been a better option," Bowser Jr. said to Mario, the plumber feeling ticked. Seeing Link throw a tantrum would've made his day.

"No, because-a then Link would've found-a the television regardless..." replied Mario, realizing that deconstructing the television was entirely all for naught. "We'd need to do-a something that would really throw him off-a edge..."


Pit and the Kongs were still watching that DKC show, and fortunately for Donkey Kong, the episode was almost over. The scene right now involved his character flying in an airplane with Funky Kong, with Funky doing an airplane trick that resulted in DK falling out of the plane and unto a snowy hill.

"I get that it's a cartoon, but there's no way I should've survived that," Donkey Kong gave his take on what transpired, before he furrowed is brow. "...and why do I hear R&B music?"

"It's time...for the music part," replied Pit, and that gave Donkey Kong more right to feel concerned. Let's see how great of a singer Donkey Kong was in the show...

I don't know what's happening to me
I'm getting all the blame for things I didn't do
Can anybody tell me just what I did wrong
I'm all alone and I'm so confused
I don't know what everyone wants me to be
I only know just how to be me
Once I was the ape of the hour
Now they think I'm a coward
An absolute zero
I'm nobody's hero
An absolute zero
I'm nobody's hero
I'm nobody's hero

Donkey Kong and Diddy, both expecting the song to be hot garbage, were both stunned. Their mouths were agape, and their eyes wide. Pit even had to pause the episode, so the Kongs could process what they heard.

"Who knew such a great gorilla like yourself was so talented?" Pit smirked at Donkey Kong, who slowly turned his head to the angel. The gorilla looked at the screen, still in complete shock.

Donkey Kong: So in that Donkey Kong Country show, I'm apparently an R&B singer that can actually harmonize well? Why does the DK in the show have to be better than me?

"This show never fails to amaze me, in the greatest or worst ways..." remarked Donkey Kong - only to panic a moment later when he heard someone knocking on the door. "Oh no, that must be Candy! She must've found me somehow!"

"Unless your girlfriend has some boyfriend sensing ability, I doubt it's her," said Pit, as he hopped up out of his seat to open the door. He saw King K. Rool, who was holding a banana peel in his hand.

"Please tell Donkey Kong and Diddy Kong to save the littering for the pros..." the Kremling said to Pit, handing the angel the banana peel. Before Rool could leave, he looked up and the screen. "...the heck are you even watching?"

"Some poorly animated show called Donkey Kong Country," replied Diddy, as Rool stepped inside the movie room so he could take a closer look. "Pit deliberately forced us to watch this."

"Sweet mother of pearl, is that supposed to be ME?!" Rool saw his character in the show, speaking with his henchmen. "Hot dang, do I look sexy...lookin' like a GQ model! Calvin Klein!"

"Nah, you look pretty same to me," Pit offered his two cents, as Rool snorted at the angel's response. Nobody could convince Rool that he wasn't remotely attractive.


Fox and Falco met with Maiko in the Star Records room, with Maiko seated across from the space pilots. She was looking at the duo with beaming eyes, like she was staring into their souls.

"I thought Itsuki was supposed to be here," Fox whispered to Falco, as he had an empty seat meant for Itsuki next to him.

"Tried contacting him earlier, but I got no response," Falco whispered back, disappointed in Itsuki's absence. "I'm afraid he's a no-show..."

Itsuki: Should I support Fox and Falco in their fight against Maiko? Yes, of course. Would I support Fox and Falco in their fight against Maiko? *paues* ...probably not. I'd rather let those two face Maiko themselves - get a little taste of what she's all about. One thing is for certain, though - they better not mess things up, for Star Records.

"So, Mr. McCloud and Mr. Lombardi...I've heard that you've done some great things with my idol singers," Maiko started off the conversation, while the pilots both kept their cool. "Any guesses as to who groomed them?"

"Pretty sure it was Itsuki's doing - sure the guy might be basic, but he's got some merit," answered Fox, as Maiko gave him a very angry look. "What, it's the truth! Don't like what I said about Itsuki?"

"You fool, it was I who groomed them...I signed them to my company, and built them up to be stars. Then you had to take them away from me..."

"...after you stepped down from your company to pursue a modeling career," Falco would finish for Maiko, leaving the former model stunned. "Itsuki's been feeding us information, don't worry about it babe..."

"Don't...call me...babe." Maiko threw her hands down on the table, and it silenced the pilots. "I'm taking back my idol singers, and there's not a single thing you boys can do to stop me. You might've had your fun already, but it's all coming to an end..."

"Okay then...but before you do anything, I want you to read this." Fox took out a slip of paper, and handed it to Maiko. "It's a letter written from one of your former employees, Kiria. I want you to read the letter in is entirety, and think long and hard about it before coming to a final decision."

Maiko took the letter from Fox, and adjusted her glasses slightly, as she read the letter out loud...

Dear Fox and Falco, the greatest bosses ever

Thank you for being the heads of Star Records

Your vision for the future is unparalleled,

And your innovation is forever priceless

Star Records is so great, that i want to stay here forever

And ever, and ever, and ever.

Once again, thank you Fox and Falco,

The awesome dudes that you are.

Sincerely, from your favorite idol singer,

Kiria Kurono

After she was done reading, Maiko looked up at Fox and Falco...before ripping the letter in half. Like the pilots expected her to fall for it.

"Nice try boys, but I've known Kiria long enough to know that she isn't a kiss up," remarked Maiko, as she tossed the ripped up letter unto the floor. "Also, that wasn't Kiria's handwriting. Kiria prefers to draw in cursive."

"False, they don't teach cursive writing in public schools anymore," argued Falco, as Maiko rolled her eyes. "For all we know, Kiria could've been out of elementary school when they stopped..."

"Kiria's in her early twenties, you nitwit...but I'm about done arguing with you both. Had enough of this foolishness. I'll just have to make more homegrown idols..." Maiko got up and marched out of the room, with Fox and Falco following her.

"No, Ms. Shimazaki, I'm sure we can work things out..." Fox said to Maiko, as he and Falco followed her out of the room. "...we'll keep the original idols, while we clone the idols and give them to you. That would be great for marketing and sales, right?" Wrong, as Maiko immediately closed the door on the pilots.

Master Hand: I feel a great disturbance in my mansion...someone's threatening...my children...time for Papa Wolf to intervene...


Left with no other options, Mario had his three Koopalings mess around with the living room furniture, in the hopes that it would finally make Link snap. Mario and the Koopalings were moving the couch Kirby and Candy were sitting on, pushing with all their might.

"Certainly there's a reason why you boys are doing this..." remarked Candy, as she was filing her nails. Even let out a quick yawn, to pass the time.

"It's because Mario is trying to make Link intentionally angry," explained Bowser Jr, finding himself sweaty from the needless pushing. "It's football related..."

"Oh, Link? You mean the green tunic-wearing elf standing in the living room right now?" Mario stopped pushing, as he looked up...and saw Link glaring right at him.

"Mario, did you have the audacity to move the couch?" the Hylian vehemently asked the plumber, both of his fists tightening with anger. "Did you move the couch out of its original spot?"

"...is that supposed-a to be a big deal?" questioned Mario, seeing that he and the Koopalings only moved the couch a mere three inches, in an angle.

"Well duh, it's a big deal...everyone with a brain knows the couch is supposed to be in equal distance away from the television. Couch can't be skewed in any direction. It's an unspoken rule."

"When I wrecked-a the television and took-a down the banners, no problem. But suddenly I move-a the couch just a little, and now you wanna act-a like you want to throw-a some hands."

"You were the one doing those things?! It's because my team won something and yours didn't, is it? Well Mario, if you really want some hands...THEN COME GET SOME!"

So Mario and Link fought each other, as they threw fists...and it sure was the most embarrassing fight ever. It was an awkward mess - nothing but rest holds and choke holds and whatever Mario and Link came up with.

Bowser Jr: Pfft, I've seen way better fights at country clubs...and the people don't even use their golf clubs, for Pete's sake. Way to let yourselves down, Mario and Link...

"I wonder, has Donkey Kong made it back?" wondered Candy, getting off the couch as she left the living room. Kirby was quick to pursue the gorilla. "Bet he's in his room, dying for me to show up!"

"Or maybe he's still finding you a gift!" assumed Kirby, as Candy ignored the puffball and continued on her way. "C'mon woman, you can't possibly be this expecting..."


Sonic and Mecha Sonic managed to get away, and were now in the second floor of the mansion, hiding behind a wall. Sonic saw how close he was to Mecha Sonic, feeling grateful that he was still alive.

"You know, we could've gotten away with killing Berkut if you had better aim," Sonic kindly told Mecha Sonic - best to get that off his chest, if it meant being killed for voicing his opinion. "Or at least a bigger beam. Either or..."

"There you are, servant boy!" exclaimed Candy as she appeared, turning around the corner of the hallway as she grabbed Mecha Sonic's arm, with Kirby still hot on her heels. "Hopefully you didn't go on a killing spree while you were gone..."

"Hey woman, we haven't killed Berkut yet, give him back!" Sonic called out to Candy, who kept on walking. The hedgehog turned around, as he snapped his fingers. "Another time, I guess...back to the drawing board."


Pit, Donkey Kong, Diddy, and Rool had just finished the episode of Donkey Kong Country, as the credits were rolling on the screen. Rool was impressed, no doubt thinking of how "sexy" he looked in the show, while Donkey Kong still had his criticisms.

"So, what did you guys think of the show?" Pit would ask the others, excited to hear their response. Only positive response he'll get would be from Rool.

"At this point, I can't tell if I sound black or Caribbean in this show..." responded Donkey Kong, the very question lingering in his mind as he stroked his chin.

"And I can't tell if I'm sexier in the show...or in real life!" stated Rool, leading the others to laugh under their breath. Just then, they heard someone twisting on the doorknob to the room, and Donkey Kong panicked.

"Shoot, that has to be Candy, it has to!" the gorilla fretted, as he hid behind a rack of DVDs. Not exactly the best hiding spot for him. "Tell her I was never here!"

"While you do your hiding thing, I'ma watch this episode in its entirety, so I can analyze my fantastic looks..." grinned Rool, as he took the remote from Pit. Diddy, not wanting to be rude, would open the movie room door...

...and instead of Candy, the spidermonkey instead saw Maiko. His face turned red, and his heartbeat was going fast...

Diddy: These women...they just keep on testing me, man...

"Hello little monkey...Maiko Shimazaki's the name," greeted Maiko, kneeling down at Diddy who was shaking. "Very nice to meet...you?" Diddy would faint to the floor, landing with a thud.

"Who?" Rool perked up as he turned around...and saw Maiko. It was love at first sight for him, giving a gigantic smile as his tongue went straight to the floor. "Sup good lookin'...you lost?"

"Um, no, I'm just looking for some new idol singers...since the ones I had in the past were taken from me. Needless to say, the negotiations I had with the Star Records heads didn't go so well, and...for that reason..."

Maiko soon found herself trailing off, when she heard a song play from the screen. It was that song in Donkey Kong Country, the one sung by Donkey Kong. The one where he claimed he wasn't a hero, and that he was worthless.

"Is that...is that a real song?" Maiko asked, pointing at the screen. She thought the song sounded like something you'd hear on the radio. The quality was top notch.

"Yup, sure is, and it's sung by the one and only, Donkey Kong!" replied Pit, running over to the rack of DVDs and rolled it to the side - revealing Donkey Kong to Maiko.

"Pit what on earth are you doing?!" Donkey Kong whispered to the angel, as Maiko approached him with a strong smile of intent. "Why are you doing this?!"

"Never in a million years would I expect you of all people to be an actual singer..." Maiko said to Donkey Kong, who responded with a very sheepish grin. "I'm Maiko Shimazaki. How would you like to be an idol singer for my new record label?"

"Idol singer? Record label? Look lady, I appreciate the offer, but singing isn't my best interest. Or my strongest suit. So why don't you leave me alone, and look elsewhere..." Maiko lifted the detective's hat off of DK's head, and stared at his...hair.

"My goodness, your hair is an absolute pigsty..." grimaced Maiko, as she shook her head. "...but I can't let you wear this hat, it'll ruin your look. How about I take you with me to Japan, and we'll get you all fixed up!"

"I mean I'd love to get my hair in tip top shape again, but is it worth a trip to Japan? I don't think...so?!" Without warning, Maiko grabbed DK's hand, and stormed out of the movie room. "Stop it woman, I'm not interested! Let me stay here!"

"Why stay here and waste your talent, when you could be making millions elsewhere? I can see the potential budding inside of you, we just need to bring it all out for the whole world to see!"

"Starting to get the vibe that you're crazy...which isn't bad, per se, but I think this will end badly for the both of us. I haven't even received any training, for crying out loud! Why must you ignore the red flags?"

"Hey DK, wait up for me!" Diddy called out as he chased after his uncle and Maiko. No way would the spidermonkey be left behind without his close relative.

Pit: *sighs happily* Don't you just love the feeling of kickstarting someone's career, turning their life around for the better. Feels good...Do I love the feeling of separating family just as much? Ew, no! What kind of sick, cruel monster are you?!

By the time Maiko left the movie room with Donkey Kong, Candy showed up, with Mecha Sonic at her side. Boy was she glad to see her man...

"Oh, DK!" Candy shouted, waving to her man as Maiko dragged her boyfriend right past her. Diddy was still chasing after Maiko. "Wait, where are you going?"

"I'm going to Japan, apparently," responded Donkey Kong, grateful that the flooring was hardwood. Otherwise he'd get some serious carpet burn. "This woman thinks I'm a talented singer, and she's signing me to her company!"

"Ooh, so that means you got a record deal? Superb! Was that the gift you had in mind for me?" Donkey Kong made a funny face when he heard the word "gift".

"Gift, what gift? What are you even talking about, Candy? Candy? CANDY!" Poor Donkey Kong was out of sight, as Maiko dragged him into the elevator and quickly closed the door, before Diddy could reach her. So the spidermonkey had to take the stairs.

"My man is going to become a singer..." gleamed Candy, thinking dreamily and fantasying about Donkey Kong's potential music career, while Mecha Sonic felt bored out of his mind. "I can already see his name in flashing lights..."

Gotta thank Pit, for jump starting Donkey Kong's musical "career".