Author's Note:
...yeah I got nothing to say. Let's just get to business:
"Will the Galar legendaries show up and cause trouble? Has Chrom forgiven Rex for the hair incident? Will a Trails of Cold Steel chapter happen when the Switch port of the third game comes out in Spring of 2020? Will we see the Diddy Kong Racing characters show up for the Christmas chapter? (Maybe have Pauline make peace with the Kongs and their friends?) and finally, what did you like about the game awards and how did you feel that Super Smash Bros. Ultimate lost Game of the Year to Sekiro?"
In due time. I don't think that Chrom has forgiven Rex for the hair incident, if my memory serves me correct. I might be able to do a Trails of Cold Steel chapter. A few DKR characters might show up in the next chapter. And I really liked the goose segment from the Game Awards. As for Sekiro winning Game of the Year, you can't really go wrong with Sekiro - that game is a masterpiece. Up next is Propeller Knight:
"Ah, speaking of Shovel Knight, have you played any of its campaigns? Do you even own Treasue Trove? If you have played them, what's your thoughts on each campaign? Again, if you've played it, which of the Order of no 2 dimes and a nickel is your favorite?"
Uh...I've never played Shovel Knight before, believe it or not. So with that being said, I don't own Treasure Trove. Derick Lindsey has a question about Fox and Krystal's wedding:
"Finally when should we expect Fox and Krystal's wedding since it feels like forever since they 1st got engaged (I know it takes a while to plan a wedding but still I'm hoping someone makes a joke about how long it took for the wedding to be planned)."
The wedding planning process has been going on for a pretty long time, hasn't it? The wedding will happen next year, I can only guarantee that much. On to MarMan:
"It's small, but I was wondering if you could have Kirby react to the Kirby Cafe now open in Japan."
A Kirby Cafe...open in Japan...I am in no way surprised by that. But yeah, I don't know when Kirby will react to this cafe made in his likeness. El Pollo Campero's got a question for me:
"So... what did you think of the Game Awards this year? (That is if you saw it)"
Outside of a few bright spots, I thought the Game Awards was boring this year. The announcement for that Fast and Furious game (with the Playstation 2 graphics) featured at the end of the awards show didn't make things any better. Last up is PinkRose4452, with two questions:
"1. What are your top 10 favorite songs in SSBU so far?
2. Will Fox and Krystal have their own house once they get married?"
1. In no particular order: Fourside Remix, We're Robots (Wily Stage 2), Gang-Plank Galleon, that Lorekeeper Zinnia song, Psycho Soldier, Mass Destruction, Vega Stage, The Grand Finale, Butter Building (Brawl version), and of course, Lifelight.
2. Good question...that's something for me to think over.
Oh wait, I do have something to say! Since this is the last chapter before Christmas and all...happy holidays, and Merry Christmas to all!
Episode 209: Maneki
The residents of the Smash Mansion might be a combative bunch, what with all the conflict and tension residing within the mansion, but if there was one thing that the residents knew how to do during the Christmas season, it was being charitable. And what better way to be charitable, than to donate toys to the toy drive?
The mansion had many unused belongings, and many of those unused belongings were often toys. Wanting to clean up the mansion a bit, Master Hand instituted a toy drive, requiring the residents to find any toy they saw lying around on the floor and donating it to the large box outside the mansion. It was just as great of a gesture as donating Christmas gifts to the homeless, which Crazy Hand thought about doing. And Master Hand later, before learning of Crazy Hand's 4-D underwater chess move.
Snake was willing to donate a toy to the toy drive, as he walked to the front of the mansion wheeling a bicycle over. The bicycle was medium-sized, yet too small for Snake to ride on. The former spy attempted riding on the bicycle, but stopped after falling off during several failed attempts.
"Deck the halls with boughs of holly..." Snake sang a Christmas tune as he walked with the bicycle, before hopping on said bicycle so he could redeem himself. "Tis the...ack!" Snake rode down on the bicycle and fell off, landing on the ground.
"Snake, are you alright?" asked Zelda, who was nearby as she ran over to Snake. The princess helped the former spy up to his feet, before inspecting him for any bruises and scars. "That was a pretty nasty fall."
"Yeah I'm alright...thought I finally got the hang of that bicycle. Turns out I was wrong...now to look for that toy drive box."
"It's right behind you." Zelda pointed behind Snake, who turned around and saw a large box of toys at the side of the mansion.
"Well I'd be...drove right past it. Well, I need to put this bike in there. I hope it'll fit, with all the other little knickknacks."
"Wow, what kind of bike is that?" asked Link as he came over, holding Ori in his arms. Appeared as if the Hylian was on babysitting duty.
"Um, I don't know...average kind, I guess?"
"The tires look pretty worn."
"Well, that is probably from all the times I tried riding on it."
"But the paint's chipping...wait, isn't this Red's bike, Snake?"
"The guy's like over thirty years old now, he doesn't need this bike anymore. Better to give it to someone else..."
"Hey, Snake, sweet ride!" Jacky called out to the former spy as he walked by, holding his hand up. Snake gave Jacky a high-five.
"Thanks, Jacky, really appreciate it..." Snake looked around, making sure that Red the Pokemon Trainer wasn't around.
"Snake? I got something for you..." Zelda told the former spy, holding up a brown paper bag. She handed it to Snake, who looked inside and saw a bunch of Christmas candy inside.
"Oh Princess Zelda...that is so sweet," Snake told the princess; he was feeling awfully chipper today. "You didn't have to do that."
"It's from Blaze the Cat. She stopped by with a bunch of Christmas goody bags."
"Did everyone get these or something? That's awfully nice of her..."
Snake: This is going to be the best Christmas ever. I've heard that my girl Meryl Silverburgh is coming over for a visit today, and I have a little surprise for her. *holds up two tickets* I've got two tickets to paradise! And no, that loser Johnny Sasaki isn't invited. I'm taking Meryl to Sandals, Jamaica, all-inclusive. You know what all-inclusive means, right? Yeah...
As Snake walked away with his goody bag, Master Kohga came over and looked inside the box of toys. The leader of the Yiga Clan dug through the box and pulled out a toy, as Link and Zelda caught him in the act.
"Oh, I think you're supposed to put a toy in the box, Kohga," Link informed the Yiga Clan leader, who glanced at the Hylian while holding a teddy bear.
"And a happy holiday to you!" Master Kohga told Link, before skipping away and giggling to himself like a little kid. Link and Zelda just looked at each other, with concerned faces.
Up in the Star Records room, all the Star Records members (including Doc Louis) were having their own private Christmas party, wearing ugly Christmas sweaters and having a great time. Only member missing was Knuckles, who had been MIA for most of the day.
But would you know it, the echidna had finally showed up to the party, and he was feeling some type of way as he stepped inside the Star Records room. That didn't seem to matter to everyone else, though, as everybody was happy to see Knuckles.
"Look who's here folks, it's the man of the hour!" Fox pointed at Knuckles, before cheering and shaking his fist. Everyone else was cheering, and Knuckles was numb to it all.
"What's with the long face, Knuckles?" Falco asked the echidna, who appeared too reluctant to provide an answer. "Fell into some snow? Happens to the best of us!"
"I'm...I'm depressed," confessed Knuckles, effectively killing the party mood with his confession. K.K. slider, who was providing the party music, stopped playing as everyone looked at Knuckles with shocked faces.
"You said you were what now?" the hippie dog asked Knuckles, who was looking down at the floor solemnly. Knuckles was the last person anyone would suspect to be anywhere near depressed.
"You heard what I said," replied Knuckles, refusing to repeat his confession for a second time. He looked up and looked around saw everyone understandably shocked. "The residents have driven me past the brink of despair."
"We're very sorry to hear that, Knuckles," said Ribbon Girl, as some of the others were wondering if Knuckles was being genuine. "Who could've possibly made you feel this way?"
"I would say that there were select individuals that were responsible...but I'd like to think that everyone in this mansion is to blame for my depression. A depression that I can't simply shake off."
"Could you at least tell us when you started feeling depressed in the first place?" questioned Itsuki, suddenly turning into a psychiatrist of sorts.
"It all started last week, when my friends and I were Christmas caroling around the mansion...almost everyone mocked us, including Mario. I wanted to take our Christmas caroling to the streets, but the damage was already dealt by the residents..."
"Okay, Knuckles - nobody thought that Christmas caroling around the mansion would be a good idea, but yourself. This one's on you, buddy."
"Yeah, well...you never even bothered talking me out of it! And now, thanks to you guys, and everyone else, I'm gonna die from depression, or be driven to death from depression! Either or."
"Now you're just being hysterical," said Ashley, who obviously couldn't care less about Knuckles' personal problems. "Your depression isn't going to kill you..."
"...oh, but it can! I'm gonna die, and then my death will be nothing but a conspiracy. Just like how Juice WRLD's death was a conspiracy!"
"So Juice WRLD abusing drugs and doing other crap on the side that led to his death was a conspiracy?" questioned Fox, as Knuckles thought over what he said for a very brief moment.
"Alright, so his drug history was mainly his doing...but the way in which he died wasn't! Everyone knows that you can't die just from biting your own tongue, even if it was during a seizure."
"He died from an opioid overdose, dude..." corrected Falco, but Knuckles still believed that there was a conspiracy afoot. "...that stuff started his seizure attack!"
"Well, I just know for a fact that Juice WRLD got assassinated in that plane! Maybe by a white supremacist - a descendant of John Wilkes Booth, I assume. Or he could've been killed by that guy who shot Tupac..."
"This is just a bunch of crazy talk, Knuckles!" Doc Louis snapped on the echidna, having heard enough. The boxing trainer just wanted to enjoy the party. "How about you just leave us alone?"
"Fine then, maybe I'll go speak with someone who actually cares about my depression..." And with that, Knuckles turned around and left the Star Records room. Shortly after Knuckles had left, the party resumed.
Knuckles: Doc Louis thinks he is such a man because he gets to train people. I worked as a trainer before - I trained Big the Cat! I'd like to see Doc Louis train people like Big. Probably make 'em feel like wimps. But not me - I can make ya do a hundred push-ups, while blindfolded - and clapping your hands! That's just one one example.
Roy was in the foyer when he heard the doorbell rang. The swordsman quickly ran to the front door and answered it, seeing a redhead standing by on the porch wearing a winter coat. It was Meryl Silverburgh.
"Ah, Miss Silverburgh...it's been a while," Roy greeted the federal agent; it had been a few years since Roy last saw Meryl in person.
"Hi Roy, is Snake around?" Meryl asked the swordsman, looking rather upset. What could she possibly be upset about?
"There she is...it's a Christmas miracle," smiled Snake, conveniently showing up around the corner as he shoved Roy out of the way. "You're about five hours early than I expected. That's a very blonde thing to do..."
"Snake..." Snake would grab Meryl's hand, and he would walk the federal agent inside the mansion before closing the front door. There were several folks passing through the foyer, who all stopped when they saw Meryl standing by.
"Hey, everybody. I don't know who you haven't met yet, but I think this is one of them. This is my lovely lady friend, Meryl. This is just the front of her. Show 'em, show 'em the other side."
"What?" Meryl whispered to Snake, easily taking back by the former spy's affable nature. Almost like Snake was on cloud nine.
"Turn around, turn around. Come on!" Snake made a body turning gesture, and Meryl frowned.
"Get outta here..." Meryl slapped Snake's hand away, as she continued to frown.
"No, you get outta here. Two can play that game."
"Hey Snake, is that the Meryl chick you would always tell us about?" asked Meowth, as Meryl wondered how much Snake talked about her at the mansion. "She's even prettier that you described her!"
"Agreed, I don't think there is anything wrong with the way you described her!" grinned James, with Jessie looking on with a face of disgust. Meryl had a face of disgust as well, as she grabbed Snake's hand.
"I need a moment alone with you, in private..." the federal agent told Snake, leading him down the hallway. Liking where this was headed, Snake smiled.
"Not as much as I need a moment alone with you," the former spy told Meryl, as he was anticipating what was about to happen next.
Snake and Meryl would have their moment alone, in a hallway closet. Despite the privacy of the meeting, that didn't stop a cameraman from peering inside the closet, so he could film all the juicy action.
"What is this?" Meryl asked Snake, holding up a Christmas photo. Snake quickly recognized the smile, as he was all smiles. It was a picture of Snake and Meryl, skiing together down a snowy mountain.
"That is my Christmas card," Snake identified the Christmas card, proud of the work he put into it. "It's a picture of you and me on a ski trip, having a blast."
"No. See, we never went on a ski trip...I went on a ski trip. Two years ago with my husband, Johnny."
"Yeah, but that loser Johnny was't around at the time. What you didn't realize at the time was that I was with you in a sense. I was in your heart..."
"Snake...this is so weird. I feel weirded out just by looking at this photo, to be honest with you."
Link: It's a bold move to Photoshop yourself into a picture with your crush on a ski trip, by Photoshopping the face of your crush's husband out of the picture and replacing it with yours. But then again, Snake's a bold guy. *looks towards unseen cameraman* Is bold the right word?
"I still think you're a really great guy, but I don't know how to deal with, um, with this thing," said Meryl, waving the Christmas card in front of Snake. "Especially considering that I'm married to Johnny and all..."
"You know what, you're not thinking straight," Snake told Meryl, as he dug into his pockets and pulled out the two tickets he showed off earlier. "You know what you need? You need to think this through in Jamaica. In their large fresh water pool."
"What are you talking about? And what are those tickets, in your hand?"
"I got us tickets to Sandals, Jamaica, We leave day after tomorrow. You better ditch Johnny, while you still can."
"Oh, Snake, I can't do this...I'm still a married woman."
"But it's all inclusive, you have to go."
"I'm sorry, but I really can't do this..."
"No, Meryl. You walk out that door and we're through."
"I know..." And with that, Meryl walked out through the closet door, as Snake sighed heavily.
Coco was over at Mario's house, typing away on her laptop as Crash and Crunch were playing a game of "snowball" throw with Spyro and Hunter. It was a game where one person tossed marshmallows into the mouths of their fellow team members to score points. Coco and Aku had to be around to ensure that Crash didn't choke or anything.
"Psst, Mario..." Coco called out to the plumber, who was picking up the dropped marshmallows from his living room floor. Mario quickly came over, after Coco beckoned to him. "I want to give you an early Christmas gift because, well...I'll just tell you."
"What for?" asked Mario, who didn't mind receiving his Secret Santa gift on early notice. At least he didn't have to wait as long as the others.
"For the past few days I've been sending Pit letters from the CIA." Coco handed a folder to Mario, which was black in color. Black for business.
"Are-a you serious?" As Mario looked at the folder, he couldn't help but laugh. It was a kind of thing that Pit would fall for.
"They're considering him for a top secret mission." Mario opened the folder, and saw two documents inside. "There's his application. Oh, and this is where I made him list every secret he promised he'd never ever tell."
"'Last year, Master Hand stayed away from the mansion because he said he had pneumonia, but really, he was leaving early to go harass students at a summer camp'...wow."
"So...here's the gift. You get to decide what his top secret mission is. Sorry I didn't wrap it..."
"You know what?" Mario closed the folder, and held it at his side. "I really don't think I should-a be doing this stuff. Peach would think that I'm some kind-a of bully."
"Oh, that's understandable. I completely understand." Coco accepted the folder back from Mario, who resumed picking up the marshmallows off the floor.
Heartbroken, Snake trudged through the hallway with his head hanging low. Master Hand was following closely behind, wondering what was the matter with Snake.
"My heart is broken, and my body is aching..." moped Snake - didn't take Master Hand that long to realize that Snake was upset over Meryl. "Christmas should be cancelled this year..."
Master Hand: Christmas cancelled? I don't think I could co-sign off of that...but I can't stand to see Snake depressed any longer. He's gonna ruin all the good vibes at the mansion!
Back at the Star Records room, everyone was still having a great time and enjoying the private Christmas party. That is, until Master Hand showed up - which didn't make the party so private anymore.
"I'd like everybody's attention," said Master Hand, as the party came to a halt the moment K.K. Slider paused the music. "Christmas is canceled."
"You can't cancel a holiday," stated Doc Louis, challenging Master Hand. Unwritten Rule #4: NEVER challenge Master Hand.
"Keep it up Doc Louis and you will lose New Year's."
"What does that mean? How can I lose a holiday?"
"Fox, take New Year's away from Doc Louis."
"Master Hand, what's going on?" asked Tsubasa, baffled by the Master Hand's rash decision.
"Snake and Meryl are done, as far as I'm concerned. No turning back. And I just don't think it would be appropriate to celebrate under the circumstances. When one resident is bummed, everyone else is bummed."
"Will they still air 'Rudolph'?" asked Fox; if for any reason all the holiday specials were cut off of television, it would be all over.
"That's not fair!" frowned Little Mac, as everyone in the Star Records room was talking over how Master Hand could cancel a holiday all willy-nilly.
"Are we gonna cancel Hanukkah as well?" asked Yashiro, speaking everyone's else talking. Master Hand saw the commotion he had caused and wished to end it.
"Fine!" the giant hand boomed, as all the talking suddenly came to a stop. "Have your party. Just know that you can't invite guests for the big Christmas party in the ballroom on Christmas Day."
"But most of the residents invited guests," stated Ayaha, as she pulled out a list from her pocket. "Even got a list right here!"
"Well, you know what Ayaha? All of your guests would have probably canceled at the last minute anyway, leaving your life a stupid rotten mess. That's no way to live!"
Tails was in the workshop, working on some kind of gizmo, when Knuckles showed up. Tails was the right person to have a discussion about depression, at least according to Knuckles.
"Tails, depression is as scary as a tractor, right?" Knuckles asked the yellow fox, who looked up with a weird facial disposition after hearing the question.
"I don't understand the question," replied Tails, as he looked at Knuckles. He had no idea what to think when Knuckles brought up depression.
"Having a career as a musical artist can lead to depression. Which can lead to suicide. I mean, this is really serious stuff!"
"Yeah, I guess so..." Tails eyed around the room; this was easily the heaviest conversation the yellow fox ever had with Knuckles.
"Nobody commits suicide because they work with a tractor, and yet people were making fun of me, criticizing my singing abilities..."
"It's really hard to demonstrate depression. I'm sure you're just overthinking stuff."
"You're right - I don't have enough facts. You don't go to the science museum and get handed a pamphlet on electricity. You go to the science museum and you put your hand on a metal ball, and your hair sticks up straight!"
"Knuckles, are you okay?" Tails was becoming wary of Knuckles at this point, fearing that his friend might've lost his marbles.
"...possibly." Still feeling unsure, Knuckles left the workshop, as a wary Tails resumed his work.
Snake went to Mario's house, and laid on Mario's couch in the living room...just so he could sulk. While Crash and company moved their game of "snowball" throw past the living room, Peach, Ruby, and Weiss were staring at Snake, who was sideways on the couch.
"Oh, it hurts..." moaned Snake, who was in a lot of emotional pain. Which could be deciphered as physical pain, in his mind.
"I know, but I'm sure you'll feel better," Peach assured Snake, resting her hand on the former spy's back. That made Snake feel somewhat better.
"It hurts my heart. It hurts my stomach. It hurts my arms."
"OK, well, why are you laying like that?" Snake turned over on the couch, now lying on the back.
"Ah, thanks. How did you push away the bad thoughts?"
"How are we supposed to know, we're not your psychiatrists," replied Weiss, as Ruby furrowed her brow at the young woman. Weiss simply shrugged. "What?"
"Snake I don't mean to interrupt, but I could get you a glass of water," Crunch told the former spy, not wishing to see Snake down in the dumps.
"Ask Pac-Man for some water...he's got that flavored water that I like," replied Snake, as Crunch nodded and left Mario's house. Snake looked up at the sky, contemplating his entire existence. "Do any of you ladies wanna go to Sandals, Jamaica with me?"
"No thanks, we're good..." replied Ruby, as she, Peach, and Weiss backed away from the couch. Snake sighed.
Crunch went to Pac-Man's house, and rang the doorbell. Pac-Man opened the door, and saw Crunch on the doorstep. Crunch looked behind Pac-Man, and saw a bunch of Namco folk - Dig Dug, Mappy, Heihachi, Reiko Nagase, and others - at a Christmas party in Pac-Man's living room.
"Howdy Crunch!" Pac-Man waved to the bandicoot, while holding a cup of water in his hand. Crunch looked at the cup suspiciously. "Sorry, but I can't invite you to my Christmas party - it's Namco only!"
Pac-Man: Master Hand is usually particular about his guest list when it comes to Christmas parties, so I went ahead and be particular with the guest list for my OWN Christmas party. Sure it makes me feel a little evil, but I guess that's what fuels Master Hand day in and day out.
"Is that flavored water?" Crunch pointed at the cup of water in Pac-Man's hand, and Pac-Man raised up the cup for Crunch to see better.
"Why yes, yes it is!" replied Pac-Man...to which Crunch took the cup from the eater of ghosts and ran away. Pac-Man just stood there dumbfounded, as Crunch retreated back to Mario's home. "Why...?"
Knuckles was pacing back and forth in the living room, with Sonic looking on while eating a chili dog. Sonic had heard about Knuckles' "depression", but hadn't gave much thought about it.
"People like to use visual aids to illustrate depression," said Knuckles, as Sonic nonchalantly ate his chili dog without giving a single care about Knuckles' completely imagined struggles. "Makes regular people look like dopes."
"Idiots! Man, what are we gonna do?" asked Sonic, following up Knuckles; in the back of his mind, the hedgehog thought that was a bad idea.
"I don't know, I don't know. Because you know what our killer is? Depression."
"Are you really depressed, my man? Because it looks to me like you're just acting stupid."
"I am depressed, Sonic...the residents drove me to this state. I'll show you...I'll show everyone!" And with that, Knuckles left the living room...
...and as he entered the foyer, the echidna ran into a friend of his, Blaze the Cat. Blaze was still handing out goody bags.
"Oh, hi Knuckles - expected to see you at the tower," Blaze greeted the echidna, before holding up a goody bag to Knuckles. "You want this Christmas goody bag? It's the last one I got..."
"No thanks, I got some big fish to fry," replied Knuckles, as Blaze put the goody bag away; at least the cat tried. "You're pretty good with heights, aren't you?"
"I've...kinda gotten over my fear over time." Blaze rubbed the side of her neck, as she was looking down at the floor.
"Great! I need you to do me a solid, and order something from the toy store for me. Since we can't borrow anything from the toy box outside..." Knuckles would grab Blaze's hand, taking the cat away.
"Hey...where are you taking me?" Blaze questioned Knuckles, as she was taken outside of the mansion.
Snake was told by Mario to stop sulking on the couch, so the former spy did something else to ease his sorrows away - blast "Goodbye My Love" by James Blunt from Mario's computer. After hearing about what went down between Snake and Meryl (after bothering a cameraman), Bowser came over to Mario's house to make Snake feel better.
"What are you doing, why are you even here?" Snake asked Bowser, who was raiding Mario and Peach's fridge. Bowser kept looking to make sure that neither Mario nor Peach were around.
"I'm getting rid of the things that remind you of Meryl," replied Snake, as he tossed several bags of bagels into a box. "Meryl is Jewish, isn't that right? Aren't bagels considered Jewish food?"
"Hey, can someone let me in?" Pac-Man asked from outside, banging on the front door; the eater of ghosts wanted his flavored water back, and he knew that Crunch was inside Mario's house.
"Why can't you just throw away the bagels in the mansion's fridge?" Snake asked Bowser, who applied duct tape to the box once he finished his deed.
"I did that already, don't worry about it!" replied Bowser, after he finished sealing the box with duct tape. "Also, I want some bagels for myself. This right here is a good excuse. Love the taste of bagels."
"Look at that, two bucks..." Snake pulled out two dollar bills from his shoes, which were close to the heel. Bowser gasped, as he ran over and swiped the dollar bills away from Snake. "What was that for, man?!"
"Who knows, Meryl could've given you those two dollars." Bowser stuffed the dollar bills in his imaginary pocket, like he planned on using them later. "Seeing those dollar bills would make you all upset again."
Snake: This is an old adage, but they say when you find true love, you know within the first 24 hours. With Meryl, I knew within the first 24 minutes of our mission together at Shadow Moses Island.
Blaze ordered a trampoline for Knuckles from a toy store, and she was with Knuckles atop the Assist Tower Blaze and Knuckles were standing atop the tall building, with the latter bouncing on a trampoline.
"Got a real bad feeling about this..." remarked Blaze, as she was feeling nervous. Knuckles on the other hand was feeling confident - for all the wrong reasons.
Knuckles: You may be asking yourself, "What am I doing on a trampoline?" Well, I thought I'd bounce here for a while, relieve some stress, and then move on with my day. Ha, as if! Here's the plan. Blaze is gonna as many peeps from the mansion and tower as she can, and then she's gonna be like, "Where's Knuckles?" Oh no! He is on the roof! Now I have got their attention. I tell them about the cold hard facts of depression, and my own depression. And then I say, "Hey! You ever seen a suicide?" And I jump. And they freak out. And they get to see the dangers of depression with their own eyes. Nice side note: They might think, "Hey, I should have been nicer to Knuckles." But it'll probably be too late then. The trampoline's just for when I miss, I can take a couple extra bounces for fun. I climb off, walk around the corner...and then start all over again. Ba-da-bing, ba-da-boom!
Blaze: *facepalms in the background*
Against his own wishes, Cloud was sent over to Mario's house by Master Hand to cheer up Snake. The swordsman was sitting in the living room with Snake and Mario, and Mario was trying to turn Snake's frown upside down.
"We all can't concentrate-a when I know you're in pain, man," Mario said to Snake, who looked away and sighed. "Let me take-a you to lunch. My treat!"
"All right. Nothing here to distract myself with anyway," replied Snake, as he shrugged his shoulders. Mario was glad, as he slapped Snake on the back.
"My man! I know-a the perfect place, too."
"You're not talking about that maid cafe, are you?"
"No. Maneki. Much-a classier. But don't worry, the babes-a are totally hot, too."
"If I'm going, I'm gonna need an entourage." Snake took a look around the living room and saw a few options - Cloud, Bowser, and Spyro. "Cloud, Bowser, Spyro...c'mon. We're going to a restaurant with hot Japanese chicks."
"Ah man, I can't..." said Spyro in a miserable tone. Sounded like the purple dragon was sick. "...not feeling so well. Got a peanut allergy, some other allergy, and I ate Brussels sprouts last night."
"Lemme see..." said Mario as he laid his hand on Spyro's forehead, and the plumber was convinced in a matter of seconds. "...okay, I believe-a you. Get better."
"Thanks." Wanting to get a move on, Snake got up from the couch, as he opened the front door.
"You drive, Mario," the former spy told the plumber, who grabbed his car keys and walked out of the door. Bowser would follow after Mario.
"Wow, thanks for taking all the excuses, Spyro," Cloud told the dragon, being the last person of Snake's entourage to leave as he still remained in the living room.
"Doctor appointment, stomach problems, plantar warts, granddad fought in the Great Dragon War...use your head, man. Look alive, Cloud..."
Snake: Bros before hoes. Why? Because your bros are always there for you. They have got your back after your ho rips your heart out for no good reason. And you were nothing but great to your ho and you told her she was the only ho for you. And that she was better than all the other hos in the world. And then...and then suddenly she's not yo' ho no mo'. That's what a wise guy once told me.
Knuckles was still bouncing on the trampoline, which was making Blaze very bored. Poor Blaze could still be in the mansion, hanging out with Sonic and Tails or playing some games in the gaming room.
"Let's just get this over with..." the cat said, as she walked away from the bouncing Knuckles. "...I'm gonna gather up everyone."
"Maybe we should test it first, Letterman-style," suggested Knuckles, bringing Blaze to a stop as the cat considered Knuckles' idea. "Throw a television over, or..."
"You made me measure it once..."
"Go buy some watermelons."
"Why should I? After you made me buy that trampoline?"
"Just go buy a stupid watermelon, okay?! I'll pay you back, I promise..."
Mario took Snake, Cloud, and Bowser to the Maneki restaurant. A waitress was directing the four men to their table.
"So she looks really hot, so I said, 'You look hotter than usual today'," Bowser told this story to the other men, who couldn't care less. The waitress directed Mario and company to their table, and Bowser gestured Snake to sit down. "Head of the table!"
"Mario I heard that you guys were at this restaurant, got here as soon as I could!" a voice shouted, and Mario and company were quick to recognize who this voice belonged to...it belonged to Pit, who ran inside the restaurant and over to Mario before grabbing a chair. "Gonna need this chair..."
"Pit, just leave-a them alone please," Mario told the angel, who placed the chair back where it was - at a table where a man and a woman were on a date - before retreating from the premises. "They're on a date. They look-a very happy."
"So she looks at me right, and she goes, 'I'm sorry, don't I even know you?'" Bowser continued his story, as the other gents sat down in their chairs. Pit was far away from the action, having nowhere to sit. "After all that time of buying lattes from her, do you believe that?"
" I can't...I can't hear what you're saying," Pit said to Bowser and company, who couldn't hear what Pit was saying themselves.
"Meryl used to drink lattes.." sighed Snake, getting all sentimental again as Mario patted the former spy on the back.
"What are you guys talking about?"
"She would get this little foam mustache..."
"Meryl used to have a mustache?"
"And I used to say 'Hey, got latte?' And she'd say, that's not funny."
"What are you guys talking about?"
"She totally got me. She understood that we didn't have to laugh to enjoy..."
"SNAKE! REPEAT WHAT YOU SAID LOUDER!"
Pit: As a self-proclaimed guardian angel, I feel like it's my duty to be there for heartbroken men and women, such as Snake. How can I be there for Snake if I'm here for Snake?
"I'm already starting to forget what color eyes she had," said Snake, fearing that his memory loss was slowly coming back, before reaching for his earpiece. "I'm gonna call her. I am gonna call and find out..."
"No, don't do it," Mario encouraged Snake, as he put his hand on the former spy's arm.
"Who are you calling?" asked Pit, as he brought a chair over to Mario's table - only for a waiter to take the chair away from him.
"I'm just gonna call her," Snake told Mario as he was reaching for his earpiece, but Mario was holding on.
"Put that away, put-a that away!" frowned Mario, as he was fighting with Snake over the earpiece and causing a scene. "S.O.S! May day! Haha. Man down-a over here, we need some-a help!"
"What can I get for ya?" a blonde waitress asked Mario and company, as she came over to the table. The waitress had long, blonde hair, and had a face that most of the men recognized, save for Snake.
"I think we'll start-a with a round of noga-sakes." Confused, the waitress jotted down Mario's request on her clipboard.
Mario: One part eggnog, three parts-a sake. Some places won't make it for-a you though, because eggnog-a is seasonal. Also, that waitress...I've seen-a here before, but not in person.
Because Knuckles put her up to it, Blaze bought a watermelon from the food market, and was ready to drop it down to the trampoline below.
"Ready?" Blaze asked Knuckles, standing at the edge of the tower while holding the watermelon in her hands.
"Let's do it! Drop that sucker!" exclaimed Knuckles - so Blaze dropped the watermelon, as it descended to the ground. The watermelon landed on the trampoline...before bouncing off said trampoline and onto a car, bursting as the car alarm sounds.
"I don't think that was supposed to happen..." You could definitely say that again, Blaze.
"Oh crap, whose car did we hit?! Deactivate the car alarm. Clean up the mess." Blaze cautiously climbed down the building, not wanting to take the flight of stairs. "If the car that we hit was B.D Joe's taxi, call some law firm and see if they handle hate crimes."
"Would this even be considered a hate crime, given that you're black yourself?"
"Also, take apart the trampoline, and toss it in the lake. Gotta hide our evidence."
"We can't toss it into the lake, not with all the Pokemon living down there."
"Oh, I'm sure there's some lurking Whiscash that would eat that trampoline...use your imagination, woman!"
Tired of waiting on his food, Bowser ventured off to Maneki's bar, wanting to see what the chef was up to. He saw the chef dicing up mushrooms with a large knife, and was left quite impressed.
"Looks like you've got a little Nakiri knife action going there," Bowser said to the chef, who just smirked as he continued to do his thing.
"No, it's Usaba," corrected the chef, and Bowser wasn't the one to be corrected by anyone. But for this moment, the koopa king would let this moment pass.
"Yeah, I bet you wish you had a Nakiri, though."
"Actually, the Usuba's the better knife when you're working with this quantity."
"Nah, I don't know...still think Nakiri's better."
"I think he'd know," said a woman sitting at the bar, as she stared at Bowser, and Bowser stared right back. Quite an intense staredown.
Meanwhile at Mario's table, Snake was still down in the dumps over Meryl. Mario was doing his best to lift up the former spy's spirits, while a chef at the table was spicing up an onion.
"Nothing he's doing is cheering me up," Snake had this to say about the chef's onion-cutting prowess, with a very saddened face.
"Wait for the onion, trust-a me," Mario told Snake, before he saw the blonde waitress walk past the table. "Excuse-a me, waitress!" The blonde waitress came over. "Hey, this man just had his heart-a broken, you wouldn't do that-a to him, would you?"
"I don't know, never really been in a relationship before," the blonde waitress replied, unsure if she was even qualified enough to be asked such a question.
"Oh, sure you would," Snake told the blonde waitress, his voice more gravely due to his currently sad state. "Look at you, I bet you break up with a guy every hour." This caused the blonde waitress to laugh as she walked away.
"You totally made-a her laugh!" Mario smiled at Snake, who was still feeling bummed out. Not even a slap on the back from Mario made Snake smile. "She totally digs-a you. Ooh, look at that!"
Mario pointed at the onion that the chef was spicing up, and watched in shock and awe as the onions smoked up. Snake and Cloud saw the onions smoking up, but weren't as nearly amazed as Mario was.
"Hehe...what did-a I tell ya?" Mario asked Snake with a smile, nudging the former spy in his side with his elbow.
"You're right, that's good," replied Snake, who couldn't find the courage or the willpower yet to smile. But then suddenly...Snake started smiling! Truly a step in the right direction.
Knuckles looked down below, and saw a reindeer inflatable below the tower. And yes, Knuckles kindly asked Blaze to purchase the reindeer inflatable for him.
"I suppose this is a much safer option," assumed Blaze as she looked at the reindeer inflatable; Knuckles was gonna owe that cat a LOT of money.
"Yeah, thanks for seeing that," Knuckles thanked Blaze, while was getting himself in the groove. Gotta get in the zone.
"When you land, please don't scream like a little girl. I know that inflatable like those are not designed for adults, but..."
"I don't know if I wanna do this..." Suddenly having second thoughts, Knuckles backed away from the edge of the building.
"Do you wanna do another test? Beedle gave me two watermelons, for the price of one."
"No. No more. The first test was horrible. If we keep doing more, we're not gonna want to jump. This is about doing, not thinking. It's like rock n' roll!"
"Pretty weird analogy, but I'll take your word for it..."
"I just gotta do, and not think. That's all. Just jump off the roof! Show 'em who's boss!"
"Let's not get completely ahead of ourselves now..."
"I am ready to do this! I am ready to make a point! What do I got to lose?"
Mario, Snake, Cloud, and Bowser finally got their Japanese food, as the men were all enjoying their chicken. Snake, who was in a better mood, was enjoying his chicken the most.
"Ah, man this chicken is good - my compliments to the chef!" the former spy exclaimed, before pointing at the chef and giving him a thumbs up. " I need some meat. I want some steak." Snake leaned over at a neighboring table, and saw a plate with steak on it. "I see steak."
"Excuse me?" frowned the man who was eating from the plate of steak, as he caught Snake eyeing his steak while holding chopsticks in his hand.
"Excuse me." Snake reached for the steak with his chopsticks, but the man would counter with chopsticks of his own. "Oh, I see..." Snake and the man fought with their chopsticks, with Snake having a good time. "Strong style, that's what this is."
"That has...nothing to do with..." started Cloud, before deciding against saying anything else. Soon the blonde waitress walked right by, and Bowser spotted her.
"Hello, waitress?" Bowser called out to the blonde waitress, who promptly came over to the plumber's table. "I want you to close your eyes and imagine your dream house. Do it for Snake! He's had a really long-a day."
"I honestly don't know what Bowser's doing," Snake said to the blonde waitress, who found herself laughing; whatever Bowser was doing seemed to work.
"Mario? Mario! What's happening?" Pit called out to the plumber, sitting far away from Mario and the others. Which was a blessing in disguise.
"Oh, uh...she's asleep," replied Mario as he pointed at the blonde waitress, who had her eyes closed. Pit was convinced, as he nodded his head.
"Narcolepsy...man, I hate it when that happens!"
"Yeah I think she has-a some narcolepsy. It's-a the worst!"
"Now open your eyes and describe it to me," Bowser said to the blonde waitress, who had her eyes closed; the waitress opened her eyes, as she tried to explain what she visualized in her head.
"I...don't know, it has four bed rooms and a loft..." the blonde waitress did her best to describe what she had visualized, even though some details were a little blurry.
"Oh my goodness, now she's up!" observed Pit, after he had seen the blonde waitress open her eyes.
"And she's trying to correctly butcher a goose, but she's-a having trouble coming up with it," Mario informed Pit, who knew that Mario was referring to the goose at the mansion...but if some goose needed to be butchered, then Pit had to give the blonde waitress some pointers.
"Oh, okay...yo, waitress! Hold its neck back and insert the knife below the jaw. Bring it all the way around, there's going to be lots of blood!" Confused, the blonde waitress looked over at Pit, as some folks in the restaurant looked disgusted. "Don't let it bother you. Have a bucket there, for the blood...and the intestines...and the feathers."
Mario: Oh no, this is different. The CIA thing, that was a prank-a on Pit. This is more like an, um...okay, it's pretty much-a the same thing.
At the command of Knuckles, Blaze had to round up as many people from the mansion and tower as she could, and tell them to come to outside. After rounding up as many folks as she could, Blaze went to the final destination, the Star Records room.
"Guys, listen up!" Blaze said to Fox and company, who were still having their private Christmas party. K.K. Slider quickly paused the music. "Knuckles is up on the roof of the Assist Tower, and he's acting rather strange."
"Woah, what's the situation?" asked Fox, who was hoping that whatever Knuckles was doing had nothing to do with his "depression".
"He claims that he's suffering from depression. I think he wants you all to come outside and watch him die..."
"Is it nice outside?" asked Doc Louis, refusing to go outside and be shivering in the cold Seattle air.
"It's gorgeous. Let's go, we don't have any time to waste..."
"Do I need my jacket? Or what about my tracksuit?"
"No really, it's very nice. Come on!"
"Will I be too warm wearing this ugly Christmas sweater?" asked Falco, showing off his Christmas sweater. Blaze sighed.
"Everybody's gonna be fine in exactly what they're wearing, let's go! Let's go!"
Mario and company had just finished their food, and Mario had already paid the bill. Stuffed, Mario looked over and saw the blonde waitress standing with another waitress, who had black hair. He saw the two waitresses looking over.
"They have been-a checking you out, all day!" Mario alerted Snake, as he brought the former spy's attention to the two waitresses. "I am not-a kidding!"
"You know what we should do?" Snake asked Mario, who was all ears. "We should invite them over, and crash Pac-Man's Christmas party." Mario nodded in approval.
"Now, you are thinking! And you know-a what? Because you have had such a rough-a day, I'll let you lead-a the charge."
A bunch of residents from both the mansion and tower were gathered outside the tower, looking up at Knuckles. It was a pretty big crowd, as Knuckles had expected.
"Come on, hurry up everyone!" Blaze called out to those who were exiting the mansion and tower. Sonic and Tails both saw Knuckles atop the tower, and both were very distraught.
"My life! Oh, my life..." whined Knuckles, with his hands in his face as he was contemplating his life choices. If this whole suicide plot turned out to be a publicity stunt, Knuckles sure knew how to sell his reaction.
"Knuckles, what's wrong?!" questioned Crazy Hand, with him and Master Hand appearing outside just to see what was up. Things were going a lot smoother than Knuckles had anticipated.
"Everything's wrong...the stress of my modern life, and the sting of being rejected, has caused me to go into a depression."
"Depression? Isn't that just a fancy word for feeling bummed out?" asked Sonic, speaking to Knuckles through a megaphone provided by Wario. Knuckles just glared at the hedgehog.
"Sonic you ignorant slut..." That was only the second time on record that Sonic was referred to as an ignorant slut by anyone, in Smash Life. "Depression is a very serious illness. Over 32 thousand people commit suicide every year, according to a 2014 study!"
"Is that the last year the data was available?" Mr. Game and Watch asked Knuckles through the megaphone, after snatching said megaphone away from Sonic.
"Yes! My head is in such pain! And turmoil!"
"Don't do anything rash!"
"Wait, where are the neighbors?" Knuckles analyzed the crowd, and saw that Mario and Pac-Man and several others were missing.
"I didn't..." started Blaze, before looking back at the houses of the neighboring residents. "...I didn't think that you would need them."
"I said to gather as many people as you could...and that included the neighbors. Better get to it!"
Blaze: Kinda infuriating that I have to partake in Knuckles' silly suicide shenanigans. The fact that neither Master Hand nor Crazy Hand are doing anything to stop Knuckles is just as infuriating, if not more.
"What are the odds that this is in any way real?" Zelda asked Link, who was still holding Ori in his arms. Like how any great boyfriend would.
"I'd say like...10,000 to 1?" estimated Link, although the Hylian wasn't entirely confident in his guess.
"Okay, I'd like ten bucks on those odds," King Dedede came over to Link and Zelda, wanting to place some bets as he offered Link ten bucks.
King Dedede: If someone gives you 10,000 to 1 on anything, you take it. If Dierks Bentley ever wins an Oscar, I am going to be a very rich dude.
As much as Mario wanted to crash Pac-Man's Christmas party, the plumber first wanted to come back home and let Peach and the others know where he and the boys had been off to. The plumber pulled his car up to the driveway and turned it off, as he and his passengers got out of the vehicle. Two of the passengers were the two waitresses from Maneki, who were now wearing street clothes.
"Aren't we missing someone?" the waitress with the black hair asked Mario; she saw the scene going on at the tower with Knuckles, but didn't think much of it.
"I made Pit and Bowser walk-a back home," replied Mario, who only gave the angel the koopa king the boot just to make room for the two waitresses. "Pit can just fly back-a to the mansion, but Bowser...it'll be a long-a walk for him."
"Sucks to be him..." the blonde waitress smirked, as she and the others followed Mario to the plumber's house. Mario opened the front door...
...and led his troop inside the living room, where Peach was vacuuming, Spyro was napping on the couch, and Ruby and Weiss were watching television. Speaking of Ruby and Weiss, both ladies looked over at Mario, and looked excited for some reason.
"We're home!" announced Mario, stepping inside the house; Snake was looking pretty fly, as he walked in with the two waitresses. Cloud was nowhere to seen; likely went back to the mansion.
"Yeah, and I got me some ladies..." smiled Snake, walking along with the two waitresses...before Ruby and Weiss got up off the couch, and knocked Snake to the floor as they ambushed the blonde and black-haired waitresses.
"Blake! Yang! You're actually here!" gleamed Ruby, as Snake - who was down on the floor - looked up in confusion. Turns out the two waitresses were more than just waitresses this whole time...
"Yep, looks like you've found us..." smiled the blonde woman, who was in fact Yang Xiao Long - Ruby's half-sister. That meant the black-haired woman was Blake Belladonna, a faunus who was a close friend of Ruby, Weiss, and Yang.
"Looks like we're finally reunited!" cheered Weiss, with Snake looking confused and frustrated at the same time s he helped himself up to his feet.
"Had a feeling that you two were around somewhere in this city..." Blake said to Ruby and Weiss, as Snake was now looking for answers. And the person that could provide him with some answers? Mario.
"You! What is the meaning of this?!" Snake pointed at Mario angrily, feeling like he was set up from the get-go.
"So as it turns-a out, Blake and Yang are pretty close-a with Ruby and Weiss..." replied Mario with a nervous smile, as Snake crept closer towards him.
"That's besides the point! Is this why you suggested that we got to that stupid Japanese restaurant?"
"Alright, I might've known about-a Yang and Blake working at the restaurant...but it was only a temporary side-a job to keep them busy!"
"I bet that's why you stopped by the apartment they were staying at, before we came here. Just so they could grab a few of their belongings!"
"All you need-a to know is, I found out where Yang and-a Blake were in this city. X came-a through with his device, and..."
"And all I need to know is...did you use me as a ploy to bring Yang and Blake to your house, and have them reunite with Ruby and Weiss?"
"Well, yes, but technically...yes."
His happiness now easily replaced with rage, Snake started screaming as he lunged at Mario, sending him to the ground. The former spy grabbed the plumber's neck and strangled him, letting out his fury as nobody bothered to save Mario.
"Oh, have you two met Princess Peach?" Ruby asked Blake and Yang, as she and Weiss introduced the two ladies to the princess.
Not interested in seeing the RWBY gang reunite, Cloud went over to the mansion, before seeing what was going on over at the tower. The swordsman ventured over just to see what was up.
"What did I miss?" Cloud asked Blaze, who was seriously regretting working with Knuckles and his crazy suicide plot.
"Knuckles is on the roof and is acting very strange," replied Blaze, watching cautiously as Knuckles was standing at the edge of the tower.
"Knuckles you can't go through with this, man - suicide sucks!" Sonic called out to his best friend, once again arming the megaphone.
"You're dang right, suicide sucks...suicide is gonna suck the life right outta me, when I hit that ground!" shouted Knuckles, pointing at the ground below him. The echidna was officially off his rocker.
Donkey Kong: Turns out this is just a performance; Knuckles repeated his shtick, when more residents and a few of our neighbors came outside. The first performance was a little off, but I really think Knuckles hit his stride, in the second show. Might even bring my Cranky Kong tomorrow, to the matinee.
Knuckles: *from atop the tower* And that is why, I am going to jump off this roof!
Donkey Kong: Oh, excuse me. It's my...favorite part.
"This is just ridiculous..." facepalmed Palutena, as she shook her head. Knuckles was gearing himself up to jump, his foot inches off the edge of the tower.
"At least mostly everyone's outside," shrugged Cloud, as Dunban looked over and saw something that caught his attention.
"Hey, check it out, there's some kind of inflatable reindeer over there," the Homs pointed at the inflatable reindeer, bringing everyone's attention to it. The focus was no longer on Knuckles, much to Knuckles' great chagrin.
"No, there's nothing to see over there, people!" Knuckles tried to inform the residents, who ignored the echidna and went over to the inflatable reindeer. Taking matters into his own hands, Knuckles went over to where the inflatable reindeer was, and was standing at the edge of the tower.
"Oh dear, he's going to jump," fretted Zelda, seeing Knuckles standing at the tower's edge. Knuckles had no regret over what he was doing - even if it was all for show.
"He's going to kill himself, pretending to kill himself," said Link, before snatching the megaphone from Sonic so he could use it to deliver a message to Knuckles. "Hey uh, Knuckles, don't jump on the inflatable reindeer. You can't do that, because you're going to get horribly, horribly injured."
"Hey Knuckles! I have a present for you, but you have to come down and get it," Coco shouted to Knuckles, holding up a Christmas present to entice the echidna.
"What is it?" questioned Knuckles, refusing to come down unless he knew what was inside. "Open it up!"
"No, you come down and open it and see for yourself."
"Blaze, find out what that present is," Knuckles commanded of Knuckles, who refused to listen to Knuckles' orders anymore.
"I don't know, she might be bluffing," replied Blaze, who wished to leave Coco and the present alone. "That present could be for someone else."
"The present could be for someone else? Blaze you are such a liar...Coco, really, what is it?"
"Knuckles, get down from there, this is stupid!" shouted a gravely voice, as Snake came over to the tower after he was finished with Mario. "You jump, you're gonna seriously hurt yourself."
"You're one of those people who rejected me, and my talents...and for that, my life is meaningless."
"Yeah, but I never said you had nothing to live for."
"What do I have to live for, then?"
" A lot of things...uh, what about Rouge? Your girlfriend. It's going good, right?"
"It's complicated with Rouge. And I don't know where I stand, or what I want. The romance isn't nearly as good as it used to be."
"Knuckles, you're a very brave man. I mean, it takes courage just to be you. To get out of bed every single day, knowing full well, you gotta be you."
"Do you really mean that?"
"I couldn't do it. I'm not that strong. And I'm not that brave."
"I'm braver than you?"
"Way braver! You're Braveheart, man. Or should I say...Lil Knux."
Knuckles was extremely taken back when he heard that. For the longest now, many people had neglected to call him Lil Knux, for their own reasons, and it made Knuckles furious at times. But to hear someone call him Lil Knux, and from Snake of all the unlikely people...that was huge for the echidna.
"Yeah, I'm Lil Knux! Lil Knux I am!" grinned Knuckles, as he began posturing around on the tower. He kept himself away from the edge, so he wouldn't fall off.
"So are you coming down, or not?" Master Hand asked Knuckles, wanting this whole charade to be over with for good.
"Heck yeah, I'm coming down! Gonna get my Christmas present from Coco."
Much time had passed since Knuckles' staged suicide attempt. Wanting to appease Blaze for the crap she had to endure with Knuckles, Snake decided to offer the cat a nifty Christmas gift.
"The least I could do was give some poor sick kid a bike," Snake said to Blaze, while he pulled Red's bike from out of the toy drive box and placed it on the ground. "Tell you what, if you want it, it's yours."
"Not much I can do with this bike..." said Blaze, as she reluctantly accepted the bicycle from Snake. "...but if I see some kid that wants this, then I'll give it to them."
"That's the Christmas spirit. Hey, do you wanna go to Sandals, Jamaica with me?" After some thought and consideration, Blaze shook her head no. "Guess it was worth a shot..." Snake walked away, leaving Blaze all alone with Red's bike.
Red the Pokemon Trainer: Have any of you guys seen my old bike anywhere?
"Hey, excuse me! Blaze!" Palutena called out to the cat, as she came over with a stern look on her face. "Hey, where do you think you're going with that?"
"I thought I could have it," replied Blaze, during not to tell Palutena that Snake gifted her the bike. Didn't want to throw the former spy under the bus.
"You can't have it." Palutena gently took the bicycle away from Blaze, before placing it back in the toy drive box. "I don't walk into your house and steal your Sol Emeralds."
"Oh, well, sorry...I didn't really know what I was thinking."
Snake returned to Mario's house, where he found Blake reading a book, and Yang doing some shadowboxing in the corner of the living room, Snake was seated on the living room couch, next to Blake.
"Thought that you ladies would crash Pac-Man's party," Snake said to Blake and Yang; the former spy would crash the party himself, but not without some backup.
"We went to go see the party for ourselves...and it kinda sucked," Blake offered her two cents on the party, as she flipped a page in her book. "Don't even get me started on the awful karaoke..."
"Yeah, the karaoke bit was a huge turn-off," said Yang, as she threw several punches in the air with swift and grace. "Had to leave while we could."
"I don't blame ya," said Snake, before slumping back on the couch and nearly falling to the floor. "Huh, I feel like crap..."
"Maybe you feel that way because you had a rebound," Spyro told Snake, as he walked by. Snake mused over this, as he sat back up.
"Hmm, maybe you're right, I did have a rebound...yeah."
"Yeah. It can be a really fun distraction. But when it's over, you're left thinking about the girl you really like, the one that broke your heart..."
Snake: I totally rebounded. Someone else shoots and I take the ball and I score. Well, I guess I didn't score and I'm not sure who's actually shooting, but, whatever. Doesn't matter. It's all good.
Coco was in the lounge, on her laptop, when a certain plumber came inside. Coco looked over and saw Mario...who was wearing a neck brace, courtesy of Snake. Coco was doing her best not to laugh.
"What happened to you?" Coco asked Mario, who bothered not to answer as he took a seat on the couch near Coco.
"That's...besides the the point," replied Mario as he adjusted his neck brace, grateful that his trachea wasn't damaged. "Forgot to tell-a you - I intercepted a transmission earlier and it seems-a that the CIA is gonna need Pit down at their headquarters in Langley for training and-a an ice cream social with the other agents."
"We should get him a bus ticket. To make his trip easier."
"Oh no, that would-a be great."
"It costs seventy five dollars."
"Hmm...well, maybe the CIA can-a send a helicopter?"
"Ooh..." Coco was laughing to herself, as she typed up a fake bus ticket on her laptop.
At the living room, Pit was watching Viridi as the goddess of nature was tending to the Christmas tree. Caring for the Christmas tree was an important duty for Viridi, though sadly the same couldn't be said for Kapp'n.
"Did you have fun at that Maneki restaurant?" Viridi asked Pit, as she was moving around the Christmas lights. Better hope that tree doesn't catch on fire.
"Nope, it was awful - couldn't hear anything," replied Pit, before he heard a phone notification. The angel took out his cellphone and saw that he received a text message.
"Who's it from, Pit?" Pit was about to find out, as he opened up the text message.
"'You have been compromised. Abort mission. Destroy phone.' Destroy phone? Oh well..."
"Pit, you're not actually going to..." It was too late; his mind made up, Pit left the living room and went into the kitchen, and the sound of the garbage disposal was heard moments later. Viridi shook her head, as she resumed tending to the Christmas tree.
Knuckles: Ah, it feels great to be called Lil Knux again. In fact, I feel great overall! I found myself in danger today, and I saved a life. My own. Am I a hero? I really can't say. But, yep. And I feel great because of it. But you know what would make me feel greater? If I went back to my roots...and I know just the way to do it!
