Author's Note:

Got a few guest reviews to answer:

"Emil is never gonna get his free ice cream huh? Will the Overwatch characters continue to visit the mansion once in a while? Will you include a scene of Miles Edgeworth interacting with Sae Niijima? (They're both attorneys). Will Peppy use his voice from Star Fox Assault? (Since his VA from 64 and Zero passed away) is Tae Takemi gonna be using her original voice or her new one from Persona 5 Royal? And finally, will a Streets of Rage 4 chapter happen when the game is released on the 30th of April?"

At this point, no. Overwatch characters will visit only on a very occasional basis. I would love to do that scene. Peppy will use his Assault voice, and Tae will use her original voice. And sadly, there'll be no Streets of Rage 4. Didn't even know that game was coming out. Next is Derick Lindsey:

"...will there be a female head of the tower as well or just one person ruling over (unless Serena is the female head of the tower)."

Meant to answer that last week...as of now, there'll be no female head at the Assist Tower. Moving on:

"...do you think you can make a quick joke of Pit mistaken Silas for Dark Pit due to them having the same voice or maybe a quick scene with Dark Pit and Silas briefly greeting each other and then wondering why they sound like each other."

I did one of those two scenarios in this chapter. You'll have to read on and find out...


Episode 228: Origination

Three weeks have passed since Waluigi got arrested and jailed in Corneria. If you might recall, the lanky man tried to interrupt Fox and Krystal's wedding, bitter that Fox was getting married while he remained a loser in love. Kanji told Waluigi to man up, so to speak, but Waluigi went about it the wrong way and landed himself in Cornerian jail.

The only way that Waluigi would be released was if someone offered to pay for his bail. But the thing was, nobody wanted to pay. Wario? He was too cheap to do it. Crazy Hand? He was off vacationing with Master Hand, Waluigi was the least of his worries now. A resident from the tower? Hardly anyone there could care about Waluigi, even if they tried.

In fact, most of of the tower denizens didn't even know that Waluigi was even gone!

Lakitu: Huh? Waluigi has been stuck in Corneria for three weeks? Since when?

Shadow: Waluigi isn't at the tower? No wonder life here has been more tolerable as of late...I sincerely hope that Waluigi, wherever he is, is gone forever.

Magnus: Took me a few days to realize that Waluigi got arrested and thrown into jail. Now I wish that it took me that same amount of time to realize something more important.

Shovel Knight: Waluigi is in jail? Ha ha, imagine that... *pauses* ...is he really stuck in jail?

Lyn: All of us could less about Waluigi. He could fly into the sun and burn to a crisp, and we wouldn't care. He could run for president, against an extremely unpopular candidate, and get assassinated before Election Day, and we still wouldn't care about him. Aside from Wario, I cannot for the life of me think of one person that would bother to attend Waluigi's funeral.

The tower denizens' apathy towards Waluigi aside, Serena desired to bring Waluigi back to the Assist Tower, dead or alive. And she sought the five candidates she had chosen for man of the mansion - Alucard, Ghirahim, Dr. Wily, Dr. Wright, and Mr. Resetti - to get the job done.

"Going to a faraway planet to rescue Waluigi of all people literally screams 'suicide mission'," Dr. Wright discussed with his fellow candidates in a room in the tower. "I wouldn't rescue Waluigi even if it was for a million dollars!"

"You're already a mayor, you wouldn't need a million dollars anyways," said Alucard, before frowning as he took a gander at Dr. Wright's haircut. "Though you could use that million dollars to get yourself a better haircut..."

"Now, now, Alucard - this isn't the time to be picking on each other," Dr. Wily said to the half-vampire, who scoffed in response. "Right now, we need to determine which one of us should be the sacrificial lamb, in regards to taking Waluigi back home."

"Back home, as in his real home - the dumpster?" asked Ghirahim, sharing a laugh with Mr. Resetti and Dr. Wright. Alucard shook his head, finding Ghirahim's joke to be quite lame. "Because that's where Waluigi truly belongs!"

"You said you had experience breaking out of jail, right Dr. Wily?" Mr. Resetti asked the evil genius, as he thought of a plan to bring Waluigi to the tower. "You should break Waluigi out of jail - not a single penny to pay out of your pocket!"

"Nah, that requires too much work and preparation," Dr. Wily objected to Mr. Resetti's plan, trying to think of a plan himself as he stroked his mustache. "Also requires fall guys. No way am I using Pit and his friends."

"Have you decided which one of you will bring Waluigi back home?" asked Serena, as she poked her head in through the room. None of the five men wished to answer, as they awkwardly looked around at one another.

"I think that Dr. Wily would volunteer!" replied Mr. Resetti, breaking the awkward silence as he pointed at a frowning Dr. Wily. Serena saw what Mr. Resetti was doing as a cop-out, and it made Mr. Resetti very nervous.

"Alucard did say that he missed Waluigi...he should do the honors," suggested Ghirahim, as Serena smiled at a frowning Alucard.

"Looks like you're off to Corneria, Alucard!" Serena walked inside the room and grabbed Alucard's hand, before dragging the dhampir away. Alucard tried to resist, but to no avail.

"No, you can't do this to me, this is torture!" complained Alucard as he looked back at Dr. Wily and company, who were all looking amused at the dhampir's plight.

"I already have the money for Waluigi's bail, in the lobby. Just ask either one of Fox, Falco, or Wolf to take you to Corneria, and bring Waluigi back. That should be pretty easy!"

"Can we just talk this out?" Alucard was dragged out of the room and through the hallway, and there was no point in him screaming for help.

"Couldn't have happened to a better guy..." remarked Ghirahim shortly after Alucard left, as he licked his lips in true Ghirahim fashion. "...serves him right, for calling me ugly."

Serena: Took me a few tries, but I managed to sucker Wario into giving me money for Waluigi's bail! All I had to do was tell him that Waluigi stole one of his wallets, prior to getting himself arrested at Fox's wedding. Waluigi might think that Wario will be happy to see him when he returns to Earth, but I might've guaranteed him a black eye..

Wario: Yes, I like to carry multiple wallets around - it's how a rich guy like myself can flex on the poor people in style. Joke's on Waluigi, since he stole the wallet with the expired gift cards! Still gonna give him a black eye though, just for the heck of it. And also for fun, and maybe science.


Tom Nook and Isabelle, the two members of the search committee - gave the eight candidates for the man of the mansion and the four candidates for woman of the mansion two weeks to let loose. But now was the time to buckle down, and see what the twelve candidates were made of. One way to do that was to interview the candidates, and see what they were equipped enough for the duty as mansion honcho.

The interviews would take place in Master Hand's room, which Tom Nook and Isabelle had complete control over with the absence of Master Hand. The point of the interviews was for Tom Nook and Isabelle to learn about each candidates strengths and weaknesses, and get a good sense of their leadership abilities - which was a very important trait.

"So are we doing this in alphabetical order?" Isabelle asked Tom Nook, as she was skimming the list of candidates. Tom Nook was busy getting the table and chairs situated for the interviews.

"Sure, if it makes things convenient," replied Tom Nook, once he finished getting the chairs situated. "The sooner we get finished with the interviews..." The tanoki would find himself interrupted, as there was a knock on the door.

"Told them that the interviews would start at two o' clock, sharp." Isabelle glanced at her watch, as she walked over to Master Hand's bedroom door. It was only thirty minutes till two. "Did someone not get the memo? Must've been Cloud..."

Isabelle opened the door, and instead of Cloud, the shih tzu saw Pit standing by. For whatever reason, the angel looked eager, like he was raring to go on a secret mission.

"Pit No-Last-Name, reporting for duty!" shouted Pit as he saluted Isabelle, looking like an army solder reporting to a general. But Isabelle was no general.

"Pit why are you here for, you're not scheduled for an interview!" Isabelle said to the angel, who gave the shih tzu a funny look before laughing in her face.

"Ha ha, silly Isabelle! What do you think I am, stupid? I'm here to report for my mission to rescue Waluigi from Cornerian jail."

"By rescue, you mean paying for his bail?" asked Tom Nook, very doubtful that Pit could easily break Waluigi out of jail with or without anyone's help. Episode 47 might prove the tanoki otherwise. "Also, Serena is getting someone from the tower to pay for Waluigi's bail."

"Aw man, someone beat me to the punch? Story of my life..." Now in a sour mood, Pit punched the nearby wall, and stomped his foot. "...this always happens to me."

"Maybe you'll get it next time," Isabelle falsely assured Pit, as he patted the angel on his lower leg. Since she was too short to pat his shoulder. "If at first you don't succeed...dust it off and try again?"

"Yeah...those are some great words to live by! Thanks a ton, Isabelle!" Pit awkwardly shook Isabelle's hand, before leaving the premises. Isabelle just stood there, dumbfounded by the handshake.

"...how long will each interview be?" the shih tzu asked Tom Nook, bringing her focus and attention back to the interview sessions. "We can't really afford any interruptions, from...erm, troublemakers."

"Depends on who is being interviewed," replied Tom Nook, as he looked out through the window in Master Hand's bedroom. "The more interesting the candidate, the more questions we'll ask...that's a good rule of thumb."


Bitter over the fact that he couldn't break Waluigi out of jail like he did for Dr. Wily a few years ago, Pit entered the foyer where Kirby and Incineroar were waiting. The pink puffball and heel Pokemon were told by Pit to wait there, against their own will.

"Bad news, you guys...we were not assigned to break Waluigi out of jail," Pit delivered the "bad news" to Kirby and Incineroar, like they were supposed to care. "Some loser from the tower got first dibs."

"I don't think we even had any responsibility to 'rescue' Waluigi, Pit," Kirby said to the angel, as Incineroar folded his arms and nodded his head. "Just because Bayonetta helped us break Dr. Wily out of jail doesn't mean that..."

"Bayonetta didn't help us...it was the other way around. We helped Bayonetta. We made the mission a rousing success, and Bayonetta was picking up the scraps."

"No, I clearly remember Bayonetta using her Madame Butterfly fists to break down Dr. Wily's cell...we would've been screwed if it wasn't for her."

"Sure got a lot of revisionist history there, Kirby..." As Pit continued to think about Waluigi, he was suddenly interested in knowing Waluigi's origin story. "...hey, do you guys ever wonder where Waluigi came from?"

"That's a...very random question to ask." Pit was in the thinking mood, as he was pacing back and forth in the foyer. "Why are you so interested in knowing?"

"Think about it! Like, where did Waluigi get his name? How did he and Wario become best friends? Why is he uncircumcised?"

"TMI, Pit, TMI...and how on earth do you even know that?! Keep that to yourself..."

"And what about his ears, why does he have pointy ears...could he secretly be an elf?"

"You already asked that about Champion Link...and the answer, is no." But was still in a curious state of mind, acting like he was on the brink of a new discovery.

"Yeah, but Champion Link's a Hylian, so he's different. Waluigi, on the other hand, could be an entirely different species. Like an alien, or something."

"That is highly debatable." No matter the debatability - for the lack of a better term - Pit was still very keen on knowing. "Incineroar and I are getting dragged into some shenanigans, aren't we...?"

"You betcha!" Pit would grab Kirby and Incineroar's hands, and took them away from the foyer. "C'mon, we got an origin story to uncover!"


Thanks to Ghirahim, Alucard was the man assigned by Serena to travel to Corneria, and pay for Waluigi's bail. Not bothering to ask Wolf, Alucard would pay Fox a visit, at the pilot's sparkling new house.

"You see this fireplace, my man?" Fox asked Alucard, showing off his traditional fireplace in his living room. "Check it..." Pressing a button on the wall, the fireplace instantly converted to an electrical fireplace, with a TV screen displaying a fire. "...pretty neat, huh?"

"Shouldn't that be considered a fire hazard?" asked Alucard, to which Fox bonked the dhampir on his head with his fist. Alucard didn't even flinch. "I was just saying..."

"Don't ever question science like that! Or technology. Science or technology. either way, just don't question it."

Fox: Our house really is the house of the future. Got a whole lotta perks, especially in the kitchen - the kitchen sink basically washes the dishes for you, and you can order fast food from touchscreen on your fridge! Very convenient, I'll say. At this rate, we should let our fridge pay our bills for us, provided it doesn't have a mind of his own. No stress for us!

"Yo yo yo!" exclaimed Falco, as he casually entered Fox's house; Fox gave Falco a house key, much to Krystal's great chagrin. "How's my favorite...married couple...doing today..." The avian pilot trailed off, when he saw Fox in the living room with Alucard.

"Sup Falco, I was just showing Alucard my fireplace of the future," Fox said to his best friend, as he pressed the button and reverted his fireplace back to its traditional setting. "Gotta say, it's pretty cool!"

"Bruh, how is that not a fire hazard? Your house should be burning to the ground, bro." Feeling some form of vindication, Alucard nodded his head and smirked at Fox, who simply brushed off the mole.

"Yeah, whatever...so what are you here for, vampire boy? 'Cause obviously you're not here to ogle at my fireplace. Or do you wanna check out my awesome fridge?"

"Serena wants me to go to Corneria, and post Waluigi's bail," explained Alucard, as Fox and Falco both held sympathy for the mole. And it wasn't because he had to travel to a faraway planet. "I'm going to need transportation, so..."

"You know, as a former best man, I feel like it's my responsibility to get Waluigi out of jail," stated Falco, volunteering himself to take Alucard to Corneria. "I can take you to Corneria, Alucard."

"Do you even have the funds for Waluigi's bail?" Fox asked Alucard, who dug into his pocket and pulled out swabs of cash that Serena had given him. "Woah..Serena must be a big money grip!"

"No, this is all Wario's money; Serena did a lot of convincing," clarified Alucard, before putting the money back in his pocket. "I will never underestimate that woman ever again..."

"Serena made Wario give up money? She's gonna get a whole lotta clout from doing that."


Tom Nook and Isabelle were about to conduct their first interview, but they couldn't do it without bringing a special guest along. Conducting the interviews with Tom Nook and Isabelle would be Mario, the former man of the mansion. It only seemed fair that the plumber would help the search committee evaluate the twelve candidates.

"So glad to be doing these-a interviews with you guys," Mario said to Tom Nook and Isabelle with a smile, seated with the tanoki and shih tzu at the table. "I'll be great to know-a the twelve candidates very well!"

"You know the twelve very well already, Mario," Isabelle giggled at the plumber, thinking that Mario was just trying to be nice and liven up the mood. "This sessions is just a way for us to determine who's the right fit."

"We may even do a process of elimination, after these interviews are over with," added Tom Nook, wanting to spice up the search process a little bit. The doorknob on Master Hand's bedroom suddenly turned. "Ooh, looks like we have our first interviewee. Come in!"

Coming inside the room was Chrom, who was strangely dressed up. Had on a black suit and a white dress shirt, like he was John Wick or something. The prince looked exasperated, like he spent most of his day vigorously finding Master Hand's room until now.

"I'm not too late, am I?" Chrom asked the search committee, as he sheepishly closed the bedroom door. The prince was holding a sheet of paper, as he sat at the table across from the search committee.

"No, Chrom, in fact...you're actually on time," replied Tom Nook, as he took a glance at his watch before taking a gander at the sheet of paper that Chrom placed on the table. "Is that...is that a resume?"

"Yes, Mr. Nook, it is a resume...I was up all night typing it out. Even had to hire someone online to proofread it. It was a good thing their services were free."

"Chrom, I don't mean to burst-a your bubble...but this isn't like some kind-a of job interview," Mario said to the prince, who was taking a deep breath as if he was expecting to bomb his interview. "We're just here to see what-a your strengths and weaknesses are."

"But what about the resume? I worked long and hard to get it right. Don't tell me that I put in all that work for nothing!"

Chrom: I've read somewhere that you have to dress for success, which is why I politely asked Cloud for one of his suits. Not that I'm trying to start some competition with him. I also typed out my resume, in the hopes that it would make me a more alluring candidate. *holds up resume* I cannot thank Marth enough for letting me borrow his laptop.

"Why don't we take a look at your resume?" said Isabelle as she grabbed the resume, and looked it over with Mario and Tom Nook. "Let's look at your job history...prince of Yliesse...captain of the Shepherds..."

"Those aren't real jobs, those are just-a fancy titles," Mario pointed out, as Isabelle frowned at the plumber and slapped his hand. "Hey, I'm just saying! Chrom didn't even list his-a duties and accomplishments as prince and captain."

"Be nice to Chrom, will you?" Isabelle kept on looking at the resume, and as her eyes scrolled down, her brow furrowed quickly. "Chrom, why did you list 'being a charming ladies' man' listed on your resume?"

"The person I got to review my resume said that I should list soft skills in my resume," Chrom explained to Isabelle, who glanced at the other soft skills listed. Some of which ranged from "great swordsmanship" to "skilled at virtual golf". "And since people think that I'm a ladies' man, on top of being a 'romantic expert'..."

"Those traits aren't what we're looking for in a man of the mansion," explained Tom Nook, as part of him wanted to snatch the resume from Isabelle and tear it to shreds if it didn't mean hurting Chrom's feelings. "We're looking for a leader of men, so to speak."

"A leader of men? I should let you know that I led a war against Plegia. I was an army general, in case you didn't know."

"Now that's-a what you call an actual job," stated Mario, as he pointed at Chrom and nodded his head in approval. "Should've listed that on-a your resume."

"Can you stop bothering Chrom about his resume for one second?" Isabelle scolded Mario, before quickly bringing her attention back to Chrom. "So Chrom, what did you learn from leading an army that you can apply to leading a mansion?"

"One thing I learned is how to deal with so many different personalities at once. I also learned how to reason with ladies...which probably explains what I'm always seen as a 'ladies man'."

"Can't have a presumed ladies' man be the man of the mansion," remarked Tom Nook, hoping that his comments didn't wreck Chrom's chances. "Could cause a lot of distractions...how would you deal with distractions, Chrom?"

"I'd say the best way to do it, is by nipping it in the bud. Eliminate all the negative factors, and remove people from the mansion if necessary."

"What if the ladies become-a distracted, because of your handsomeness?" Mario aggressively questioned Chrom, putting his hands on the table.

"I mean, that wouldn't really happen since I'm married...but if that did happen, then I would have a sit-down conversation with that woman. You can't let anyone get the wrong idea."

"Such a boring answer..." Mario was frowning as he sat back in his seat, expecting Chrom to give a more dicey answer. Would've been funny, at least to Mario.

"Oh, I forgot! I also typed up a cover letter." Chrom dug into his pockets, reaching for his cover letter which is probably all crumbled up now. Not very professional. "Want you all to see it, but I don't know where it is..."

"Starting off with Chrom was a mistake..." Tom Nook said quietly to Mario and Isabelle, with Chrom fumbling around for his cover letter as he got up from his chair. "...we should've gone alphabetically by last name, rather that first."

"Chrom, Lucina, Lucario, Link, and Zelda all don't have last names," Isabelle informed Tom Nook, who realized this as he let out a depressed sigh. "Meta Knight is debatable."

"We could've made up a last name for them...Chrom would go by 'Chrom...Google', or something like that. Oy..."


Pit was dying to know more about the origins of Waluigi, with Kirby and Incineroar only sharing a minimal amount of the angel's enthusiasm. Pit knew that he would get nowhere without asking people, which is why he wished to consult with Waluigi's best friend, Wario.

"You ladies do know that I can just walk over this line, right?" Wario asked the ladies in the beauty salon, as he pointed down at the red line on the floor at the beauty salon entrance. "You're not as firm as you think you are."

"It's for your own good, Wario," informed Fiora, acting like the red line of separation was only for the fatso and not any other man. "Unless you want another black eye from Wii Fit Trainer..."

"My fault for touching her backside by accident...screw that red line, I'll just show up at the salon whenever Wii Fit isn't around. Easy peasy!"

"Wario!" Pit called out to the fatso, with Kirby and Incineroar following after him in the hallway. "We need to ask you a serious question. It's about Waluigi."

"Oh yeah, Waluigi! Wonder how that bloke is handling things in Cornerian jail. I owe that man a black eye, for stealing one of my many wallets!"

"You'll get a black eye yourself if you lay a single foot in the beauty salon!" Fiora called out to Wario, who frowned at the Homs and waved her off.

"All talk and no bite, see where that gets ya..." Fiora would respond by throwing a bottle of shampoo at Wario, nearly nailing the fatso in the eye. "...you know, it's a good thing she missed. Thank goodness her aim is poor."

Fiora: It's not so bad when married men and men in a relationship are in the beauty salon; they actually know their boundaries. It's the single men we worry about the most, they're nothing but glorified skirt-chasers. We could literally install lasers in the salon that shoot single men dead on arrival, and yet men such as Wario would risk their lives just to lay their grimy hands on any woman in sight!

"We're trying to find out the true origins of Waluigi," Pit explained to Wario, who didn't fault the angel for wanting to be in the know. "Which is why we wanted to ask about your friendship with Waluigi. How did you two become best friends?"

"Great question! Not that many people have asked me that before," responded Wario, flexing his fingers as he was ready to tell Pit and company a story. "It all started, with the game of tennis!"

"Yes, go on, go on?" Pit readily took out a notepad and a pen, about to write some important stuff down.

"Mario wanted to have some stupid tennis tournament, and it was doubles. Mario had Luigi, Peach had Daisy, so on and so forth. Sadly for me had to partner to claim, no one to compliment my skill...and that's when Waluigi came around."

"So you first met Waluigi at a tennis tournament? That sure does explain a lot..." Unsurprising that Pit didn't know this beforehand. "...how exactly did you Waluigi meet - did he come to you, or did you come to him?"

"Actually, I'm so sure...all I know is, he just showed up one day, and we absolutely crushed the doubles tournament handily! Lots of fun memories."

"Okay, pretty good stuff...but what about Waluigi's name? Did his parents actually name him Waluigi, or did he come up with it himself?"

"I'd like to think he came up with the name...I mean, Waluigi just sounds so completely made up! What irresponsible parent would name their kid Waluigi?"

"Same goes for any irresponsible parent that names their kid Wario..." muttered Kirby, as Wario overheard the pink puffball and shook his fist at him.

"Don't think I heard that, you pink slob...anything else you wanna know, Pit? I can tell you about all the birth marks on Waluigi's skin!"

"Ew, no, that's gross..." grimaced Pit, as he waved his hands in front of him. "...I'm more interested in knowing if Waluigi is uncircumcised more than anything."

"You think that birth marks...are more disgusting than knowing if someone got circumcised or not? Good gravy, Pit, you gotta have some priorities..."

"I do have priorities...and those priorities are only about Waluigi! Thank you for giving us your time, Wario." Pit would salute Wario, as he ran down the hallway. Kirby and Incineroar had no choice but to follow their fearless leader.

"Man, I wonder where that kid's head is...kinda obvious there's no brain in that head of his."


Next to be interviewed by the search committee was Cloud, and as expected, the swordsman wanted his interview to be over with as quickly as possible. But he knew that wouldn't happen without answering a bunch of questions that he personally found bothersome.

"Some say that you're too nonchalant and carefree to be a good leader," Tom Nook said to Cloud, who essentially proved the tanoki's point by yawning and stretching his arms. "What do you have to say about that, Mr. Strife?"

"Guess you could say that I've built up immunity to all the annoying crap at the mansion," replied Cloud, answering Tom Nook's question the best way he could. "Probably have like a million antibodies in me."

"Being nonchalant isn't the best way to solve your problems," stated Isabelle, as she believed that Cloud would make himself a more alluring candidate if he put his foot down more instead of taking things easy. "How do you deal with annoyances?"

"When I'm not ignoring them? Uh, I just take it one step at a time. But I gotta be swift, too. Can't let it linger around forever."

"A child predator trespasses-a into the mansion and tries hurt some-a one, what would you do?" Mario asked Cloud, who was greatly taken back by the question. Not because of the context, but because of who was asking.

"I stop them on arrival, and...kick them out of the mansion for good. It's not rocket science, Mario." Not getting the answer he wanted, Mario snapped his fingers in disgust as he sat back in his chair.

Mario: This is not going the way-a that I was expecting...the interviewees are giving the most-a basic answers. I want to hear some-a thing exciting, something that would give us a more in-a depth look into the candidate's personality. Obviously they're playing it safe.

"About your comment about me being nonchalant and carefree, I don't think that's true," Cloud said to Tom Nook, letting the tanoki how he really felt. "It might look that way, but I'm just very chill and laid back."

"Yes, you've always had very low temperament," said Tom Nook, who couldn't recall the last time he ever saw Cloud super angry. Provided such an instance had ever happened before. "But, can you balance that with strict authority?"

"Of course - I'm a pretty effective communicator. The trick is to be firm. Never overstep your boundaries."

"Something you learned-a from hanging with Aerith, huh?" Mario sneered at Cloud, expecting Cloud to blush and look embarrassed. But Cloud held his own.

"Not really, in fact...I might've learned it from watching you, Mario." Mario went from an instigating mood to a proud one, smiling at Cloud with his hand on his chest. "Guess I learned from the best..."

"Oh, step, you're gonna make-a me blush..." Mario's face was turning red, as he was smiling even harder. Isabelle couldn't help but notice that the redness on Mario's face was already there before...

"Mario, are those rashes all over your face?" Isabelle asked the plumber, before taking out a small mirror and showing Mario his reflection. "Did you forgot to take your facial cream this morning?"

"Mama mia! I did forget!" Screaming at his own reflection, Mario ran out of the room and to his house. Looks like someone must've forgot to do their morning routine, or at least one step of it.

"Good thing I didn't pick up on Mario's forgetfulness," remarked Cloud, trying to crack a little joke; neither Tom Nook nor Isabelle laughed.


Once he applied some facial cream to his face, Mario quickly returned to Master Hand's room, for the next interview. It was now Itsuki's turn, and the head of Star Records looked composed, with a gentle smile.

"What makes-a you think that you're a perfect fit as man-a of the mansion?" Mario asked Itsuki; with his blue sweater jacket and tan trousers, one might argue that Itsuki already looks the part.

"Do I need to show you all my accomplishments at Star Records?" Itsuki rhetorically asked the search committee, before laughing and clapping his hands together. "Ah, I'm just joking. I think my success at Star Records can carry over to pretty much anything else."

"You're one of the youngest candidates - only in your early twenties," Isabelle said to Itsuki, who took pride in being a young buck. "How can you command respect from others, at such a young age?"

"Always have to look the part, and know the part...and let your methods do the talking. Sometimes actions speak louder than words."

"Would you steal money from-a others? Like how Master Hand steals-a money form you?" Mario asked Itsuki, recalling the various amount of times Master Hand took money from Star Records without even asking.

"Absolutely not! If Master Hand was here, I'd tell him to stop and put him in his place...that would really show the others how good I am."

"Surprised that he didn't want-a to do that until now..." Mario whispered to Tom Nook, as he was stealthily giving Itsuki a side-eye. "...must-a enjoy being a victim."

"I mean, as long as he isn't playing the victim card..." Tom Nook whispered back with a shrug, not sure what Mario was trying to get at.


Silas was back at the mansion once more, and he still had his eyes set on Kamui. As the cavalier walked through the halls of the mansion, he saw Sonic, walking with Crash from the vending machine room.

"Pringles in a bag, isn't that something?" Sonic said to Crash while holding a bag of Pringles, acting like he was holding a sacred artifact. "What are the odds!"

"Sonic the Hedgehog!" Silas called out to the hedgehog, who stopped as he and Crash turned around at Silas. "Good to see you yet again. Seems like we run into each other every time I'm here!"

"Yo, Silas, my man!" Sonic walked up to Silas, with Crash following after him. "Have you met my good friend, Crash Bandicoot? Say hi, Crash!"

"Woah!" Crash greeted Silas the best way he could, before holding out his fist from a fist bump. A confused Silas looked at Crash's fist, before he awkwardly bumped Crash's fist with his.

"Is 'woah' the only thing he can say?" Silas curiously asked Sonic, worried about Crash's extremely limited vocabulary. "Because he doesn't seem that...smart..."

"Well he can also laugh...but that's not really actual words or anything," replied Sonic, before looking down at his hands...and seeing his bag of Pringles missing. He looked at Crash, and frowned when he saw the bandicoot eating from his bag of Pringles. "You rotten little..."

Coco: Crash's vocabulary isn't that limited...for what it's worth, he sometimes speaks in gibberish, and such a vocabulary is not very limited when you think about it! Why in fact, I've been doing my best to keep track of all the gibberish words that Crash speaks. Got enough verbiage to put together some kind of gibberish dictionary. Won't be a New York Times best-seller, but you never know...

"Do you know where Kamui is?" Silas asked Sonic, who was chasing around Crash and trying to get back his bag of Pringles. "I got some chocolate to give to her!"

"You got her what now?" questioned Sonic as he stopped in place, and Crash would consequently stop as well. No point in running if you're not being chased, otherwise where's the fun in that?

"A box of chocolates! There was a small sale going on somewhere in town, and I got this box of chocolates as a discount." Silas took out a heart-shaped box of chocolates, and it got Sonic smiling.

"Silas...it's about time you got with the program, man," Sonic said to the cavalier, acting like a proud father as he put his hand on Silas. "If winning Kamui's heart is what you're after, then Crash and I are here for you!"

"I would appreciate your help, Sonic...but why are you involving your friend in this? I don't mean to be rude, but he's too...brain-dead for my taste."'

"Crash might look like that, but he's very dependable. I should know, from experience. You won't know unless you give it a try!"


Pit, Kirby, and Incineroar stood outside the gaming room, with Pit reviewing the notes he took during his conversation with Wario. Kirby and Incineroar where just standing around, with Incineroar looking at his nails, and Kirby just lying on the floor.

"What is our next order of business?" Kirby asked Pit, not that he was entirely interested. The sooner that he and Incineroar were done with Pit's shenanigans, the better.

"I would tell you, but...I just don't know how to carry it out," replied Pit, tapping his ink pen on his forehead, before he saw Mewtwo head out of the gaming room. "Until now..."

"What do you mean 'until now'?" Kirby would instantly see what Pit meant, as he saw the angel watch Mewtwo head down the hallway. "Oh no...oh no..."


Lucario stood outside Master Hand's room, taking a peek inside and seeing Link being interviewed. Link was looking professional, but not a tryhard like Chrom was.

"What qualities do you possess?" Tom Nook asked Link, knowing how much of a hero the Hylian was. "Traits that you can use as man of the mansion?"

"I feel like I'm a very honest and courageous person," replied Link, thinking of as many adjectives as possible to describe himself. "I'm also willing to make sacrifices, which is something great leaders must do. And I'm also noble - that's very important."

"Yes, yes, yes, you exemplify those traits, and then some. But what about your weaknesses? What is one thing that you struggle with constantly?"

"Zelda has said that I can be very hard-headed...then again, that comes with determination. Which is another good trait about me."

Link: Full disclaimer...a few of the stuff I listed off to Tom Nook, I don't really have locked down yet. The way Nook asked me that question, it just felt oddly personal to me! Felt less of an interview and more like I was setting up my own dating profile on Tinder! *pauses* Do people still even use Tinder these days? If not, I can see why...

"Thank you for your time, Link!" Isabelle thanked the Link, who smiled and nodded his head as he got up and left Master Hand's room. Lucario was the first person Link saw when he exited the room.

"You're up next...go in there and break a leg," Link encouraged Lucario, patting the aura Pokemon on the shoulder as he walked away. Taking a deep breath, Lucario walked inside Master Hand's room, and took a seat.

"So what is this interview all about anyways?" Lucario asked the search committee. "You want to ask me about my personal life? You're setting yourself up for disappointment if you do."

"No, we just want to see if you're a right fit as man of the mansion," replied Tom Nook, with Lucario still taking some time getting used to be called a man. "Or should I say...Pokemon of the mansion."

"Eh, I'll take either one at this point...let's just get this over with, I have some meditating to do pretty soon."

"You obviously remember when you were the lead general of the army Pokemon, a few years back," Isabelle said to Lucario, reminding of the aura Pokemon of the time when he prepared the Pokemon for their fight against the Heartless. "What did you learn during your time as general?"

"Other than knowing about Master Hand's...eccentric way of doing things, I learned how to be more of a leader. And believe me, leading hundreds upon hundreds of Pokemon wasn't easy..."

"Those Pokemon are nothing compared-a to the crazies walking around-a in the mansion," stated Mario, and Lucario knew that fact all too well. "How can you manage-a so many different personalities, at once?"

"Got to have patience...patience is key. Sometimes you'll have to give things up for the greater good, like your sanity."

"Speaking of giving things-a up...your lover, Lopunny," said Mario, recalling Lucario's relationship with Lopunny. Lucario, for whatever reason, looked ticked. "How would you feel-a about leaving the sanctuary, and being away from-a Lopunny?"

"What exactly are you trying to get at?" Lucario slowly stood up, as he aggressively stared down a now intimidated Mario.

"I'm just saying that if you were man-a of the mansion, you can't be smooching with Lopunny all the time as much-a as you used to! You gotta give it up!"

"Who's to say that you weren't smooching with Peach, when you were the alpha male here?" Lucario tossed the table unto the floor, as he chased after Mario. "Get back here!"

"Mama mia!" Mario was running all over the room, with Lucario chasing him every which way. Tom Nook and Isabelle remained where they were, watching the chase unfold from their seats.

"I reckon that Mario might've had too much creamer in his coffee today," assumed Tom Nook, as Isabelle mulled over the possibility and nodded her head. "He's a little out of his element today..."


Falco and Alucard were in Corneria, at the jail that Waluigi was imprisoned at. They went to the front desk, to speak with the prison guard there.

"We're here to post bail of one of the prisoners here," Falco told the prison guard, with Alucard holding the wads of money Serena had given him.

"Cool, whose bail are you posting for?" the prison guard asked Falco and Alucard, swinging a pair of handcuffs around on his index finger.

"Waluigi - he's, uh, an acquaintance of ours," replied Alucard; the prison guard stopped swinging the handcuffs, as Waluigi's name resonated with him.

"Waluigi? You're talking about the ugly, lanky guy with the mustache? You're gonna pay his bail? That's cool, I guess."

Now there was nothing but awkward silence, as all three individuals were now staring at each other. The prison guard didn't move, not even bothering to show Falco and Alucard which cell Waluigi was staying in.

"...you seriously want to release Waluigi from jail?" the prison guard asked Falco and Alucard, wondering what was wrong with the pilot and dhampir. "Why...?"

"Look, bruh, we don't really want him either..." stated Falco as he folded his arms, now regretting flying to Corneria. Should've let Fox or Wolf take his place. "...but someone back on earth must miss the guy. It's hard for me to see why."

"I can take you guys over to Waluigi's cell. If you want to change your mind about paying his bail - and I wouldn't blame you for it - just come speak with me."


Mewtwo knew that Pit was after him, and so the genetic Pokemon was doing his best to avoid the angel by teleporting around the mansion and stuff. But Pit and company would eventually corner Mewtwo in the printing room, and Mewtwo had no choice but to give in.

"C'mon Mewtwo, give us your sage advice!" Pit stressed to the genetic Pokemon, who was keeping his distance from Pit and company as he laid against the wall. "We need to know more about Waluigi's origins."

"Pit, that's not sage advice," Mewtwo informed the angel, wishing for either one of Viridi or Palutena to come in and take Pit and friends away. "You're just pestering me for needless information."

"Needless information? Ha! We're on the verge of a major breakthrough, and you're here trying to dismiss it."

"What is it about Waluigi that you're dying to know? He is nothing but a perpetual loser, and you know it and I know it."

"Well he's the most interesting loser to have ever existed! And we must know more about him! Like, was he uncircumcised or not?"

"...you want to know if Waluigi is uncircumcised?" Mewtwo would be more concerned, if anyone other than Pit was desiring to know. "I can tell you one thing...that Waluigi is indeed uncircumcised."

"Ha ha, I knew that he was't!" Pit cheered as he held out his hand to Incineroar, for a high give. Incineroar just left the angel hanging. "Do you have proof of this?"

"Nintendo confirmed it to be true, if that deserves a ton of merit. Waluigi is truly uncircumcised, and will remain that way for a long time."

Mewtwo: For what it's worth, Waluigi being uncircumcised is just a rumor...that was started on a satire website, in the vein of The Onion. Simon, who regards The Onion as actual news, showed me the article about Waluigi's circumcision, and now I gave Pit the "details" from it. Kind of feel bad about it, since I'm literally brewing stupidity...

"Waluigi obviously doesn't want anyone to know about him being uncircumcised, so let's keep this between us," Mewtwo said to Pit, and he didn't bother telling Kirby and Incineroar because they didn't care anyways.

"Will do," Pit gave Mewtwo a thumbs up, as he, Kirby, and Incineroar left the printing room. Mewtwo felt relieved once he was all alone.

"Kirby and Incineroar are the greatest friends in the universe, for having to put up with that imbecile..." was Mewtwo's final remark, before teleporting away.


Lucina was in the hot seat now, as it was her turn to be interviewed by the search committee. There was one thing weighing in the princess' mind, though...

"You look pretty prepared for this interview, Lucina," Isabelle said to the princess, taking note of Lucian's serious visage. "Then again, you always look like that, all of the time..."

"Be honest with me, how much of a dork was Father during his interview?" Lucina quickly asked the search committee, who did not wish to answer lest they crush Lucina's hopes of Chrom being somewhat cool. "He was acting like a dork, wasn't he?"

"Not...entirely," replied Tom Nook, giving Lucina some assurance that the search committee's interview with Chrom went well. "But he did come to the meeting dressed up in a dapper suit."

"I told him not to do that..." Lucina was grumbling as she banged her forehead against the table. "...all he had to do was show up in his normal clothes, but he couldn't even do that."

"He also showed us a resume he spent all night typing up," added Isabelle, as Lucina slowly lifted her head up and looked at Isabelle with a disgruntled face.

"Did he show you the cover letter he typed as well?" Right on cue, Isabelle took out Chrom's crumpled up cover letter, as Lucina's forehead fell to the table surface once more. "Why does he have to be like this..."

"This cover letter has a lot of formatting errors...kinda apparent that Chrom didn't hire some proofreader to review it." Lucina was just glad that Chrom didn't have to pay the person he found online to proofread his resume for him.

"Whatever, let's just get this interview over with." Lucina lifted her head up, regaining her normal composure. "I feel like crying into a pillow right now..."

"You're obviously a princess, so how would-a you feel ruling over a mansion?" asked Mario, as Lucina had her index finger underneath her chin.

"Wouldn't say that 'ruling' is the right word...but it'd be nice to have some authority around here. Father never gives me authority to do what I want."

"But if you do become-a woman of the mansion, you can use-a your authority to ask Master hand to remove-a Chrom from the mansion. Then you can-a do whatever you want, without Chrom sniffing up-a your neck!"

"We're not here to promote bad ideas, Mario," Tom Nook advised the plumber, not wanting Chrom kicked out of the mansion by any means necessary. Although Lucina wouldn't mind if that ever went down.

"It's not really a bad idea - I would actually love an extended break from Father." That got Mario nodding his head at Tom Nook, as he pointed at Lucina.

"But we can't just kick residents from the mansion all willy-nilly, just because they're endearingly annoying. Surely there's a method to Chrom's madness."

"Tom Nook, have you at least-a considered how much of a smothering father Chrom is to Lucina?" Mario asked the tanoki, who looked puzzled; clearly Tom Nook hasn't been observing enough. "You probably didn't have a good-a bond with your dad, so you wouldn't know."

"...can we please get back to the interview?" asked Isabelle, bringing everyone's focus back to the interview and preventing Mario from going in on Tom Nook's personal life and childhood. "So, Lucina, what would be your first order of business, as woman of the mansion?"

"Removing Father from the mansion, for an indefinite period of time," replied Lucina; Isabelle sighed, as Mario proudly smiled and nodded his head. "It can't be anything about Father? Well, what I would do is sell Master Hand's Lamborghini."

"Ooh...are you sure Master Hand would even allow that?" asked Tom Nook, knowing how much in love Master Hand was with his Lamborghini. Although he couldn't drive it, what with being a giant hand and all.

"It's not like he still needs it...I can just tell him to donate to charity. He'd be happy to do it then."


Falco and Alucard were standing in front of Waluigi's jail cell, where they saw Waluigi sitting in his cell through the prison bars. Waluigi was on the floor, back against the wall, and playing a harmonica. His harmonica solo was excruciatingly long, made worse by his poor playing skills.

"When do you think he's going to stop?" Alucard whispered to Falco, while Waluigi played the harmonica to his heart's content.

"Give him ten more seconds," Falco whispered back; ten seconds passed, and Waluigi was still playing that harmonica. "That's it, I'm going in..."

Falco would go in by punching the prison bars, but that only resulted in the avian pilot hurting his hand. Falco winced in pain, cradling his injured hand as Waluigi stopped playing his harmonica and looked up.

"Falco? Alucard?" uttered Waluigi, as he stood up and looked at Falco and Alucard with a big smile. "You guys came to save me? You two are the best!"

"Don't get too excited...it's not like we decided to get you out of jail ourselves," Falco told Waluigi as he shook his afflicted hand, to shake off the pain.

"Well to tell you the truth...I'm actually pretty fine with staying here, at this jail." This came to the surprise of Falco and Alucard, as they expected Waluigi to be over the moon about the prospect of returning to earth.

"But don't you wish to go back home?" asked Alucard, wondering what had gotten into the lanky man. "Surely you have learned your lesson by now."

"Yeah I learned my lesson...don't go around interrupting wedding ceremonies, I get it. But I like it here! One of the jailmates even gave me this harmonica, free as charged!"

"Being in jail sucks - the mood stinks, and the food stinks," said Falco, in a somewhat futile attempt to change Waluigi's mind. "Do you even like the prison food?"

"It's better than Chef Kawasaki's food...but not by much. It's edible, so that's what matters."

"But for real though, why don't you want to go back to the tower? What do you have to lose?"

"Nothing...nothing at all." Waluigi looked at the wall, as he was feeling some type of way. "No one at the tower wants me. Not Crazy Hand, not Shadow, not Dr. Wily, and not even Tiki! To them, I'm just a big, fat loser..."

"Someone at the tower does want you," stated Alucard, giving Waluigi a sense of hope. And no, Alucard wasn't going to mention himself. "Serena wanted me to go to Corneria, to get you out of jail. Even gave me some money, to post your bail."

"Does that mean Serena cares about me? Does it...does it mean that she secretly has the hots for me? Is Serena my one true love?"

"Nooooo...but it does mean that she's concerned about your well-being, and wants you back at the tower, safe and sound."

"You also still have some unfinished business with Ryo and King," Falco informed Waluigi, who was still entangled in a love triangle affair with Ryo and his woman. "Can't get that sorted out in jail, can ya?"

"No I can't..." replied Waluigi as he looked down at the floor momentarily...before lifting his head up. "...but you know what? My mind is all made up. The Wah-Man's coming back home!"

"Great! But please don't refer to yourself as the 'Wah-Man' ever again, aight? That's just straight-up cringe, dude."


It was now Meta Knight's turn to be interviewed by the search committee, as the Star Warrior quietly entered Master Hand's room. He walked towards the chair placed across from the search committee, but couldn't reach it due to his small height.

"Uh...I can't reach this chair," Meta Knight informed the search committee, pointing at the chair. Mario was kind enough to lift up Meta Knight, and sit the star warrior on the chair. "Much appreciated, Mario."

"You're welcome!" responded Mario, as he returned to his seat. The plumber was quick to notice that Meta Knight's head was barely above the table. "You need some-a books to sit on?"

"That would be nice." So Mario left his seat once more, grabbed a few books lying around the room, and placed them underneath Meta Knight. Now Meta Knight was in direct eye contact with the search committee. "Much better."

Meta Knight: This is disgraceful...how can I expect the residents to take me seriously, if I'm this short? I know it's theoretically impossible, but I'm going to need a growth spurt real soon. Ashley can't help me out, since she threw away all her potions...

"You let a lot of power go to your head last week," Tom Nook said to Meta Knight, who lowered his head in shame. "When you tried to manage that whole Terry fandub incident. Why did you think that you could outright ban someone from the mansion?"

"I wanted to show the others how authoritative I can be," replied Meta Knight, having enough self-awareness to admit that he was in the wrong last week. "No one was really taking me seriously, so I did what I had to do."

"We also heard that you were openly mocking Terry's Engrish," stated Isabelle, making Meta Knight feel ashamed about himself once more. "In the presence of Terry, no less! A man of the mansion should never act like that."

"I realize the mistake that I made, and I apologized to Terry shortly after that incident. That behavior was exhibited because of how much I wanted to prove a point."

"I made-a fun of Takamaru's broken English, and never got reprimanded for it," confessed Mario, in what appeared to be a humble brag. What else did Mario get away with, when he was man of the mansion?

"We won't...talk about that," said Isabelle, giving Mario the side-eye before directing her attention back to Meta Knight. "Meta Knight, if you wanna be an effective leader, you can't be worried about how the others feel about you. Don't let things get to your head. Do the right thing!"

"Yes, I understand...do the right thing, just like that Spike Lee movie," said Meta Knight as he nodded his head. "Why am I mentioning movies now?"


Falco and Alucard were ready to pay for Waluigi's bail, but they had to wait on the prison guard first. The prison guard, who was on his lunch break, went over to Waluigi's cell.

"You guys are seriously going through with this?" the prison guard questioned Falco and Alucard, expecting the two to change their minds in a jiffy. "If this is what you really want..."

"Waluigi wants to go back home," replied Falco, and the prison guard could not believe that Falco and Alucard were standing their ground. "Dude really knows where his heart is."

"Guess I have no other choice..." Heaving a sigh, the prison took out a key, and used it to unlock Waluigi's cell door. Waluigi was all smiles, leaping out of his jail cell like a madman.

"I'm free, I'M FREE!" the lanky man cheered - only to be handcuffed by the prison guard. "Okay, maybe not right now, but sooner or later I'll be FREE!"

"We are now ready to pay for Waluigi's bail," Falco announced, as Alucard showed the moolah to the prison guard. The prison guard just stared at the money in Alucard's hand, before laughing his butt off.

"Do you guys not know how bail works?" the prison guard asked Falco and Alucard, who clearly did not know as both men remained silent. "You can't just pay bail up front, like you do with mortgage. You have to deposit it, so that Waluigi can show up in court."

"I hate the criminal justice system so much..." With no other option in mind, Falco had to take matters into his own hands. "...he's what we're gonna do instead." The avian pilot punched the prison guard, who winced in pain as Falco snatched Waluigi and ran off.

"What the..." The prison guard looked up, and saw Falco and Alucard running away with a handcuffed Waluigi. "Guards, after them!" A bunch of other prison guards showed up, as they chased after Falco and company like bloodhounds.

"Go, go, go, go, GO!" Falco shouted at Alucard and the handcuffed Waluigi, who were running for their lives just like Falco.


"Good afternoon, Mr. Arisota," Mario greeted the young man, who coolly sat down in his chair while looking cool. In his mind, Minato thought that he was overdoing the whole shtick. "Ready for-a your interview?"

"Ready as I'll ever be," replied Minato, as he rested his feet on the table; he looked towards the search committee, expecting a reaction, but they all just stared at the young man. "You...want my feet off the table?"

"Do whatever you wish," replied Tom Nook, but Minato took his feet off the table anyways just to be safe. "Now before we begin, we can confirm that you weren't the one who stole Makoto's debit card, correct?"

"Correct; it was all one big misunderstanding. Sonic squarely tried to put the blame on me, but I snuffed him out pretty quickly."

"So you got to the bottom of it? Good stuff, Minato. Way to squash the trouble before things went out of hand."

"Yeah, but I didn't like being the scapegoat. Makoto wanted me for dead, and I did nothing to quell her frustration until I decided to explain things. I chose to let things slide, and I regret that."

"It's good to know you realized that you were in the wrong," Isabelle commended Minato, who had no reason to feel ashamed. "Admitting your fault shows character."

"I suppose, but I still have a lot of work cut out for me...I'm a work-in-progress, so to speak. Got nowhere else to go but up..."

"We're glad to see you take note of that! Just keep it up, and you might be man of the mansion in no time!"

Minato: Isabelle is giving me false hope that I could be the mansion's alpha male...how I dealt with Sonic last week did give me confidence, though. Not a lot of confidence, but a small minuscule is better than nothing.


One of Minato's close friends was interviewed next by the search committee, in Mitsuru. For many of the residents, Mitsuru was the second-best favorite to be named woman of the mansion.

"If you must know, I am the leader of the Shadow Operatives," stated Mitsuru, as she already had some experience as a leader under her belt. "I know what it takes to be a leader."

"But can you lead a group-a of more than a hundred people?" questioned Mario, wanting to see if Mitsuru was up for the challenge. "A couple of people is nothing compared-a to a full mansion."

"You led the mansion once before...if you could do it, then anyone else could it too." This comment made Mario frown, with the plumber might've had some shade thrown at him.

"Do I detect a sense-a some contempt in that remark, Ms. Kirijo?" Tom Nook and Isabelle were on edge, ready to hold back Mario if necessary.

"I've heard the stories...how you forced some residents to do some extravagant acting class in the meeting room. And your little spat with Doc Louis, I heard about that one as well. Not a good example you were showing."

"That 'extravagant acting class' was psychodrama, it was supposed-a to be therapeutic. As for my beef-a with Doc Louis, it was just a huge-a misunderstanding."

"Did you even do anything when Organization XIII was around? Because I've been told that you were more focused on your wedding with Peach than stopping the Organization in their tracks."

"How did-a you even know about...that's-a it." Mario stood up, as he did the unthinkable and took off his gloves. You know it was going down for real whenever Mario had to take off the gloves.

"Now Mario, this is one of the candidates..." Tom Nook did his best to soothe the plumber, who was mean mugging Mitsuru. "No need to throw the hands..."


Pit learned a lot about Waluigi today; he learned that Waluigi first befriended Wario at a tennis tournament (which was obvious), and that he was uncircumcised (which was only satire). But the angel craved for more; he needed to know one more tidbit about Waluigi's origins, before calling it a day.

"What about Waluigi's parents?" Pit asked Kirby and Incineroar, as the friends were hanging out in the hallway. "We don't know anything about them."

"We don't know anything about Mario's parents, or Link's parents or even Captain Falcon's parents," stated Kirby, thinking that Pit's quest to know more about Waluigi's origins was (hopefully) coming to an end. "So why bother?"

"Because Waluigi's parents might tell us everything we need to know about their son, and them some! You guys might not care, but I certainly do!"

"You're darn right Incineroar and I don't care...which is why we both want out of this crazy train ride. You're on your own, Pit."

"In that case, I'll have to carry on...as a lone ranger." Tipping his imaginary cowboy hat, Pit walked confidently down the hallway. "I'll let you guys know what I find out once I'm through."

"Take your time..." Kirby called out to Pit, before shaking his head. "...we really should put an end to this, Incineroar." As Incineroar nodded in agreement, the mansion's resident forensics expert Ema Skye came around the corner.

"Put an end to what? Pit's acting up again?" Ema asked Kirby and Incineroar, and she knew the answer just from the duo's body language. "What is it this time?"

"Pit wants to know more about Waluigi's...origin story, and he has a very interesting way of doing it. We might've let things run its course too long."

"That always seems to be the ongoing theme with Pit and his usual shenanigans...where is Pit off to now?"

"He's finding a way to reach out to Waluigi's parents. Hopefully after he does that, it'll all be over."

"You know, we can end this whole thing quickly if you want. Pit wants to speak with Waluigi's parents, so...we'll let him speak with his 'parents'. Or one of them."

"And how are we going to do...that?" Kirby saw that Ema was smirking, and it had the pink puffball highly strung. "Why are you smirking?"

"Incineroar knows why I'm smirking..." Incineroar did, as he had his hand over his mouth to cover his apparent smile. "...so, Kirby, what's it gonna take to bring your 'girlfriend' over to the mansion?"

"She is not my..." Kirby decided against arguing with Ema, sighing in defeat as he walked away. "...let me see what I can do."

Kirby: For the last time, Adelaine is NOT my girlfriend. She's just a lady friend of mine, the only one I have... *grumbles* ...I really need more lady friends in my life. Does Viridi count?


Pit was on the hunt for Waluigi's parents, but didn't know where to start his search. The angel walked past the gaming room, where he saw Silas lurking around the mansion with his box of chocolates.

"You know where I can find Waluigi's parents?" Pit moronically asked Silas, who barely even knew who Waluigi was.

"Sadly I am not quite familiar with this Waluigi fellow," replied Silas, as Pit gasped in shock when he heard the cavalier's voice.

"No way...Dark Pit, is that you?!" Silas was understandably confused, having every right to think of Pit as a weirdo. "You lost your wings, grew taller, and got your hair styled like Lucas' and dyed it silver?! That's one heck of a glow-up!"

"What are you talking about, doofus?" a certain doppelganger questioned Pit, who turned around and saw Dark Pit standing by. "I'm right here..."

"Aw crap, there's TWO Dark Pits now?! One is already enough to handle!" Pit couldn't process everything, as he stormed away to relax his brain. "I'm gonna have to investigate this later..."

"That guy sure looks like a handful," Silas had this to say to Dark Pit, shortly after Pit had left. Dark Pit was taken back by how resemblant Silas' voice was compared to his, but he got over it.

"Believe me, he's more than a handful..." assured Dark Pit, before walking away. "...if you ever come back to this mansion again, make sure to steer clear of him."

"Duly noted." Silas would stand around in the hallway, seemingly waiting for Kamui. "He said that Kamui would be here soon..."

"I'd love to get back to reading my magazine, if you boys don't mind," said Kamui, as she was led out of the gaming room by Sonic and Crash. Silas' face brightened up at the sight of Kamui. "You're interrupting my downtime."

"This is way more important," replied Sonic, as he pointed at Silas; Kamui would look at the cavalier, who quickly hid his box of chocolates behind his back.

"Oh, Silas...back at the mansion again, just as you promised." Kamui walked up to Silas, with Crash smiling and Sonic rubbing his hands in anticipation. "I sense that you have something for me."

"How right you are..." smiled Silas, as he revealed the box of chocolates to Kamui. Kamui gasped, pleased by the kind gesture. "...got this just for you."

"A box of chocolates? For me?" Kamui accepted the box of chocolates from Silas, and took off the lid just so she could stare at the assorted chocolate pieces.

"According to the box label, most of the chocolate is caramel." Kamui looked up at Silas, with a look of great delight. "You...like caramel?"

"Are you kidding me? I love caramel!" Kamui would embrace Silas in a hug, as Sonic enthusiastically pumped his fist and give Crash a high-five. "Thank you, Silas!"

"It was the least I could do." After she was done hugging Silas, Kamui gave Silas a small kiss on his cheek, making the cavalier blush a little.

"Since you're here, you should go pay Corrin a visit. He wasn't around last week, when you showed up at my picnic."

"I was wondering what he was up to..." Without hesitation, Kamui grabbed Silas' hand, and walked down the hallway with the cavalier. Silas looked back at Sonic and Crash, with the former giving a thumbs up. And Silas gave a thumbs up in response.

"Crash, my man...it looks like Silas is well on his way," Sonic told the bandicoot, feeling proud as ever as Aku showed up behind the hedgehog and Crash.

"What is Kamui doing hanging out with an older-looking Lucas?" questioned Aku, watching Kamui and Silas walk down the hallway; Sonic and Crash both gave the floating mask questionable looks. "It's the hair, it's the hair I tell you!"


Many people couldn't believe that Cortex was chosen by Master Hand, to be one of the eight candidates for man of the mansion. But Cortex, despite the haters, was making the most of his opportunity, as he was ready for his interview. As the search committee waited for Cortex, Cortex's pet goose crept his way inside Master Hand's room.

"That's obviously not Dr. Cortex," stated Tom Nook, merely stating the obvious...before Cortex entered the room while roundhouse kicking the door wide open. He was accompanied by Uka, while wearing a yellow hat that read "MTSMGA".

"Make The Smash Mansion Great Again!" shouted Cortex, cheering while playing a cowbell. The search committee members found themselves facepalming at Cortex's showmanship.

Tom Nook: The one downside to this search? It's taking place during an election year...oy vey.

Cortex: The seven other men aren't taking this seriously, I feel like. With the exception of Meta Knight, they're just lounging around, thinking that the duties as man of the mansion will be given to them...they're not taking initiative! Which is why I've started my very own campaign, to let my competitors know how it's done.

Uka: You know that a so-called campaign's going down the drain when your "campaign mascot" is a stupid goose. Dr. Cortex is gonna get served a dose of hubris, and I'm all for it!

"My hat shouldn't be a trigger warning," Cortex said to the search committee as he took his seat, putting his cowbell in his lab coat pocket. "I know it has negative connotations already..."

"Dr. Cortex, this isn't some-a kind of presidential campaign," Mario informed the evil genius, who refused to listen. "You're taking this-a way too far!"

"It's a presidential campaign to me, dang it! I have a vision for this mansion, and the only way this vision can be carried is through..."

"Your vision can only be approved by Master Hand...you know that, right?" interjected Tom Nook, shutting up Cortex. But Cortex refused to remain silent any longer.

"Well, yes...but if it makes you feel more confident in me, I have a 100% approval rating among my faithful minions. A good sign of my leadership."

"But what is your approval rating among the residents?" questioned Isabelle, and Cortex didn't look so sure about that one. "Some people can't stand you."

"They just can't stand how successful I am. They're all jealous of me, and they're too chicken to admit it!"

"Found any success defeating Crash Bandicoot?" asked Tom Nook; Cortex was always stumped whenever it came to matters about defeating Crash.

"I have defeated Crash, multiple times...albeit in racing competitions, and foolish party games. But I do have a lot of inventions to my name!"

"What do these inventions of yours mean to your candidacy, as man of the mansion?" Cortex couldn't believe Tom Nook's question, as he scoffed mightily.

"Um, hello? You do realize that a man of the mansion has to be intelligent - which I am. Me being the mansion alpha will be like Tony Stark leading the White House."

"You just made Tony Stark roll over in his grave, and he's not even dead let alone real," Uka said to Cortex, who frowned and shushed the floating mask.

"Shut up Uka, you're interrupting me in my quest to make the Smash Mansion great again..." Cortex was bound to shove his campaign slogan down the residents' throats, for weeks to come.


Serena was in the lobby of the mansion, adjusting a crooked picture frame on the wall. The sage smiled at a job well done, before looking towards the opened front door. In came Falco, Alucard...and Waluigi.

"The Wah-Man is back at the tower!" announced Waluigi as he raised up his arms, while Falco and Alucard sighed. "Oh, right, I can't say that anymore..."

"Waluigi! Welcome back!" Serena greeted the lanky man, before noticing that he was still wearing his prison uniform. "You're still in your uniform..."

"Long story short, we kinda had to bust Waluigi out of jail," explained Falco, before handing Serena the money meant for posting Waluigi's bail. "You're welcome."

"Don't ever tell Waluigi that I missed him..." Alucard whispered into Serena's ear, walking past the sage and heading to his room as Falco returned to the mansion. Waluigi would give Serena a hug, letting her know how he felt.

"Thank you for wanting me to go back home, Serena!" Waluigi thanked the sage; he could kiss her a sign of his gratitude, since nobody was around looking. "Good to know that you cared about me enough to bring me back!"

"I wouldn't want anyone from the tower left behind," smiled Serena, as Waluigi ended the hug and started celebrating. "Ultimately, I did what I had to do."

Serena: Going to give Wario his money back. Not sure what that means for Waluigi...I think Wario is still going to give him a black eye.

Wario: I would give Waluigi a black eye for stealing one of my wallets...but that convo I had with Pit reminded me of the fun times that Waluigi and I had together. Got me all sappy. I think I'm gonna spare Waluigi a black eye.


Samus had just finished her interview, and the bounty hunter left from Master Hand's room bored out of her mind. The interview, like most other things, was a waste of her time.

"You're the last person to be interviewed...congrats, I guess," Samus said to Zelda, passing by the princess in the hallway. "It's not much, so make sure to keep your expectations low..."

"Thanks for the heads-up..." responded Zelda, as she made her way to Master Hand's room. The princess entered the room, and saw the search committee waiting.

"Last interview of the day..." remarked Tom Nook, as Zelda took a seat across from the search committee. "...I've been looking forward to this one."

"Given all my qualifications, this should be a breeze." Zelda was the princess of Hyrule, after all, so she would ace her interview without breaking a sweat. "I'm ready when you are."

"Excuse me!" Ema shouted from behind the bedroom door, knocking on it several times. "May I come in?"

"Yes you may," Tom Nook called out, as Ema entered Master Hand's room. "What is it?"

"Mind if I borrow that phone, for a sec?" Ema pointed at Master Hand's phone, which was on Master Hand's dresser. "It won't be long..."


Pit was determined to find Waluigi's parents, and he wasn't going to stop until he found some kind of evidence. As he ventured into the foyer, looking around for whatever reason, he heard the phone rang.

"Smash Mansion, this is Pit speaking!" Pit quickly answered the call, putting his needless quest temporarily on hold. "How can I help you?"

"Hello Pit," greeted the person on the phone, speaking in a rather motherly tone. "This is...this is Waluigi's mother. How are you..."

"You're Waluigi's mom?! No way! Man, I've been looking all over for you AND your husband!"

"Oh really? Aw, that is very sweet of you...I'm just calling in, wondering about my son Waluigi. How is he?"

"Not so good - he's still stuck in jail, for interrupting a wedding. Some forgot that he was jailed, myself included."

"My own son, in jail? How disappointing...he's always getting himself into trouble."

"True dat, true dat...but while he's away, I'm been trying to find out about his origins. Since you're here, mind telling me about Waluigi's..."

"Actually, you can do me a favor - not only for me, but for my son. I don't think Waluigi will appreciate what you're doing."

"Aw, why not? I just wanna know more about Waluigi. He's a deceptively private individual."

"Yes, that might be true, but I think Waluigi wishes to stay that way. You should respect his privacy more."

"Does that mean...I should stop finding out more details about Waluigi's origin story?"

"Yes. I want you to put it to bed. Leave it alone. Be more mindful of Waluigi, and his privacy."

"Okay then, Waluigi's mom! I'll stop what I'm doing, and respect Waluigi's privacy. I should probably let my friends Kirby and Incineroar know...should I?"


"...ah, yes, that would be swell," replied Waluigi's mother...who was actually Kirby's friend, Adelaine, speaking in a motherly tone. The young artist was speaking on Master Hand's phone at the Assist Tower, in a room with Kirby, Incineroar, and Ema. "Thank you, Pit. Goodbye."

"And that...should do it," remarked Ema, after Adelaine ended the phone call. "Thanks for coming through, Adelaine."

"No problem!" responded Adelaine, with a bright smile. "Kirby sometimes depends on me to squash Pit's mischief, so this is nothing different for me."

"Hey guys, guess who's out of jail..." someone said, before Waluigi awkwardly cartwheeled his way inside the room and stuck an imperfect landing. "..the Wah-Man is back, and better than ever!"

Waluigi: Falco told me to stop using the term "Wah-Man"...but I can't stop using it! It just rolls off the tongue. I'll only use it whenever Falco isn't around.

"Waluigi was in jail, for what?" Adelaine asked Kirby; she wouldn't know, for Falco never invited her to Fox's wedding. Yet he invited the Aenslands...

"Honestly, I forgot," replied Kirby, and Incineroar and Ema didn't know either as they either shook their heads or shrugged their shoulders. "I even forgot that Waluigi ever went to jail to begin with!"

"Feels good to be back..." said Waluigi, as he happily inhaled and then exhaled before leaving the room. "...now where on earth is that Crazy Hand? I need him to bring me up to speed."

"Should we tell him?" Ema asked Kirby and Incineroar; Serena will likely fill in the "Wah-Man" on what he missed.


Zelda was finishing up her interview with the search committee, and she was knocking it out of the park. There was a reason that Mitsuru was only second-best to the princess of Hyrule.

"In short, that is why I believe I have what it takes to be woman of the mansion," Zelda told the search committee, as she was wrapping things up. "I have the pedigree and the prestige to get the job done."

"You are a descendant of Hylia..." remarked Mario, as if being a descendant of a goddess made Zelda a better candidate than most. "...thank-a you for your time, princess."

"Really glad to have had this interview with you all." Zelda got up and left, giving the search committee a great deal of confidence. "I expect you all to make the right decision in choosing the right candidates!"

"I'm part-a of the decision-making, am I?" Mario curiously asked Tom Nook and Isabelle, before he heard a text notification sound. The plumber grabbed his phone, and read the text message sent by Lakitu.

"What does it say?" Isabelle asked Mario, who was frowning as he read the message. Lakitu either sent the message in a foreign language, or had one too many grammar mistakes.

"'The Wah-Man is back'..." Mario read the text message out loud, as Tom Nook and Isabelle both cringed. "The 'Wah-Man'...must-a be Waluigi, back at the tower."

Waluigi the 'Wah-Man' was indeed back, and he's here to stay - and he's ready to let loose.