So, tonight is the first annivasary of Jeff's death and I wanted to explore how Ethan was feeling. As you guys may know the reason I'm including it in these one - shots is because I don't want to start a new story. On with the chapter.

This is up quite early as I know I will forget if I don't post it now.


The Secret Life Of Casualty

Chapter 82.

Ethan stood in the kitchen, staring at the calendar on the wall. The date was circled in red. He knew what that meant. It was the anivasary of Jeff's death. And Ethan, who had suffered from survivors guilt, the fact that he was was saved and Jeff wasn't, felt guilty all over again.

Cal walked in to the kitchen, he noticed Ethan's face.

"Ethan, it's ok to feel sad" He told him, putting a hand on his shoulder.

Ethan shook his head. "Cal I'm fine" He told the older one, but it was obvious that he was wasn't.

Cal sighed, he desperately wanted to help Ethan, but he didn't know how to. A few weeks after the crash, he had suggested counselling but Ethan had brushed him off and thrown himself in to his work.

The two of them headed out of the flat and in to Ethan's car and he started the car and they drove to the ED. Ethan cut the enginge and hot out of the car as did Cal and the older brother wrapped an arm around Ethan as he squirmed under him.

Cal laughed at him as they headed inside and to the staff room to change in to heir scrubs .


On, her break, Dixie walked to Jeff's bench, with a coffee in her hands. She sat down on the bench and then she realised she wasn't alone. Ethan was sat beside her with his NHS hoodie wrapped around him.

"it's my fault Jeff's dead " Ethan said.

Dixie swallowed her mouthful of coffee before speaking. "No, sweetheart, it wasn't, it was an accident "

Ethan let a tear fall down his cheek as Dixie pulled him in to a hug. The two needed that hug. Ethan stood up, thanked Dixie and she nodded as she continued to drink her drink.


At the end of the shift, the team meet in the pub, and Dixie brought the first round of drinks. She put the tray down on the table and lifted her drink. As did everything else.

Tamzin walked in to the pub, with her hoodie up over her face, she'd left and now she decided to return as she wanted to toast Jeff's memory. She sat down next to Dixie, who whispered quitely.

"Hiya sweetheart "

Tamzin offered her a weak smile in return.

Ethan stood up and pushed his glasses up his nose nervously, he wasn't known for his public skills.

"Can I have everyone's attention, please?" He asked, quitely.

The team turned to face him as he picked up his glass of orange juice and said quitely.

"To Jeff!"

"To Jeff, our hero!" The team repeated as they all clinked glasses. Tamzin and Dixie had tears in their eyes as they toasted the man they had loved.


I hope you guys enjoyed reading it. Dissopointed that we have no Cal and Ethan tonight.