Author's Note:
Who's ready for some SUPER MONKEY BALL BANANA MANIA?! With the game coming out next week, this chapter will feature a lot of monkeys and bananas. And a guest character who appears in Banana Mania, who I won't mention by name. Also, with DLC for Life is Strange: True Colors released, the main characters from True Colors will also be making an appearance in this chapter. Now, who's ready for some reviews?
"What if Midna appeared as her Twili form during Link and Zelda's wedding? I don't know, man, we're all dying to see her Twili form in this story."
I know people have been clamoring for Twili from Midna for a long time. Will it happen? I'll keep it a secret. Another anonymous review:
"Wait a minute, didn't Samus once said that Zelda is one of the only people she considered a friend? Then why is Zelda not inviting Samus to the Bachelorette Party? I guessed Samus doesn't want to go, and I understand that."
I had no room to squeeze her into the bachelorette party, but we can just say that Samus was too busy to attend. That, or she didn't want to hang out with the other ladies (i.e. Barbara). One last anonymous review:
"Umm, Dante? There is this lady named...Lady? You forget about her? Maybe you should try and hang out with her! Her or Trish."
I'd rather let Dante go with Trish, in all honesty. The Reader has a LOT of questions concerning the most recent Nintendo Direct:
"1. Will there be an episode based on Mario Party Superstars, or are you gonna skip it due to your early dabble on the subject on Episode 146?
2. Will Robbie shows up with Purah and Advisor Impa at Link and Zelda's wedding? Because I think it's weird having Purah without Robbie.
3. Who do you think Sakurai will reveal as the final DLC character on October 5? My guess is it's gonna be a Pokemon character, but I wished that the final character will be Arle (or Amitie [or Ringo]) from Puyo Puyo. (Also, it's a funny coincidence that the final Smash reveal is happening on October 5, the same day as Nickelodeon All-Star Brawl release day)
4. Will there be a chapter for Kirby and the Forgotten Land? Kirby having his own chapter is a long time coming, you know.
5. Banjo-Kazooie (and other N64 and Genesis games) is coming to the Switch thanks to Nintendo Switch Online in the near future! Will we see a chapter with Banjo-Kazooie characters?
6. Finally, what is your opinion on the Mario movie cast? I say the cast looked nuts. I mean, Chris Pratt as Mario? Charlie Day as Luigi? SETH ROGEN AS DONKEY KONG?! Why didn't they cast Charles Martinet and other actual voice actors, man? Why did they have to pick Hollywood actors for the roles?
7. BAYONETTA 3 IS FINALLY REVEALED! That's all I have to say about that. We don't even know if the Bayonetta in that game is the same as the one from Bayonetta 2. But, related to the trailer, will Marie- uh I mean, Lappy shows up again? I mean, you're planning for an Astral Chain redux chapter, so I hope Lappy will appear more in that chapter!"
1. I might give it a go.
2. Purah will be showing up. He and Purah are inseparable.
3. The homer in me says Crash, but aside from him, I can't think of anyone else.
4. There will be a chapter for Kirby and the Forgotten Land.
5. Of course! It would be fun seeing characters like Mumbo Jumo and Gruntilda in this story.
6. Outside of Chris Pratt and Keegan-Michael Key, I didn't mind the voice castings. Still wish that Charles Martinet voiced Mario.
7. There will be plenty of Lappy in the future Astral Chain chapter.
David has questions:
"Will Captain Syrup appear again for the wedding? Will you be able to do a Super Robot Wars chapter when the 30th anniversary game comes out on October 28? A scene of Corrin playing Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic? (It's getting a Switch release). Will Kasumi Yoshizawa get more screen time? (Been noticing a lack of it lately). And finally, what did you like about the Nintendo Direct?"
Yes. I can try. I could do that Star Wars scene. Will try and give Kasumi more screen time. And what I liked about the Direct was the new Kirby game and all the new stuff for Nintendo Switch Online. On to...Wait a minute!
"How is Corrin with the ladies at their bachelorette party?! Was that supposed to said "Kamui"?"
Oh snap! Yes, that was supposed to be Kamui. My mistake. Romance Enjoyer has more romance-y questions:
"1. Will we have a Robin x Lucina wedding? Or did they marry offscreen, like Corrin and Felicia? Kind of a bummer if that's the case, since a Fire Emblem wedding is something too good to only be an offscreen event, and the only FE wedding we got so far is Berkut and Rinea, and they're not even a Smash character, dangit!
2. Which FF love story is the best for you? FF7 (Cloud/Aerith [or Tifa]), FF8 (Squall/Rinoa), FF9 (Zidane/Garnet), FF10 (Tidus/Yuna), FF13 (Snow/Serah) or FF15 (Noctis/Luna)?
3. Any plans on somehow bringing Jun to the story? Someone needs to put Kazuya in his place, and I don't think Heihachi or Jin wants to do that.
1. They married offscreen. (I'm so sorry...)
2. Such a tough question...I will go with Squall/Rinoa.
3. No plans as of yet, but I'll keep Jun in mind going forward.
BowserFan327 is back, and with a random idea:
"For Halloween, how about a triple feature. The Persona 4 Shadow selves, The Emmi, and the random idea: Monika's Revenge! Having returned in human form as an assassin after taking lessons from Hank J Wimbleton."
Funny story - Monika was going to return in human form a couple of chapters ago, but the idea was scrapped. Would this triple feature occur? With this year's Halloween chapter being Fatal Frame-themed, I dunno. Last is An NFL fan, with some breaking news:
"Oh my God. RICHARD SHERMAN IS GOING TO THE BUCS! Yes, Tampa Bay Buccaneers is signing Richard Sherman. Do you think Master Hand is no longer considering Sherman a traitor, now that he moved from San Fran, or is the bridge already burned? But honestly, I'm surprised that the Bucs are going all in for this year."
The Buccaneers are now the Los Angeles Lakers of the NFL, it's now official. As for Master Hand, I think the bridge between him and Richard Sherman has already been burned. Once a traitor...always a traitor.
Episode 302: MonkeyBusiness
Link naming Ganondorf to be his wedding officiant was seen as a surprising choice by many. Some might even say that it was a very unpopular choice. It was hard not to see why.
Ganondorf, the demon lord who has been a thorn in Hyrule's side, officiating a wedding between Link and Zelda? Zelda couldn't believe it when Midna spilled the beans to her. But as Cloud said, Link had done a lot of thinking. Impa was out as officiant due to being Zelda's maid of honor; Researcher Zelda might be too inexperienced. And would anyone give Ghirahim a fair chance?
Due to the unpopularity that surrounded Ganondorf, Link decided to name Pac-Man as his "backup" officiant. But little did the Hylian know that there was a certain pilot in wait, who was reigning to earn the officiant role one way or another. He wanted to officiate the wedding more than anything and add another worthy accomplishment to his name.
"So that's where the wedding is going to be held two weeks from now, huh..." said Cloud as Link was showing him the wedding venue on Champion Link's Sheikah Slate. Link and Zelda had kept said venue a secret until today.
"Getting everyone inside is gonna be the hard part," explained Link as Falco entered the Hylian's room, holding a laptop under his arm. "But I think that we can make it work."
"Does look a tad small, but it could be because of how the picture was taken. Maybe you were right to let Zelda pick the venue."
"Yeah, I guess so. Don't know why I was so worried about her making the big decisions. If it were left to me, I would've chosen to have the wedding at..."
"Ahem..." Falco cleared his throat, as he caught the attention of both Link and Cloud. The avian pilot was wearing some dressy attire, which was a rarity for him outside of weddings. "...you boys got a minute?"
"Is this about the officiant job at Link's wedding?" Cloud asked Falco, who walked over to the swordsman and Link as he opened the laptop. "Give it up, Falco - Link already made his decision."
"Which is exactly why I'm here to reverse his decision." Falco placed the laptop on Link's bed and saw the password prompt on the screen. "What was the password...oh yeah! 'ilovelaracroft4lyfe'. All lowercase."
"Whose laptop does that belong to...?" Link asked Cloud out of concern, as Falco entered the password and logged into the laptop. Falco then opened up a web browser and pulled up what appeared to be a PowerPoint presentation.
"Ta-da! This is what I intend to use, in regards to presenting my best case." Falco showed the laptop to Link and Cloud, who both furrowed their brows as they read the PowerPoint presentation's title.
"'Why Falco Lombardi Should Be the Officiant For Link and Zelda's Wedding: No Bias Included,'" Link read the title of the presentation out loud, while also reading the words under the title in-between parentheses. "'Also Features Commentary From Katt Monroe.'"
Falco: Was up all night working on the presentation, so I could have it ready to be presented to Link. Adding in the slide transitions and the pictures was the easy part. The hard part was contacting Katt and getting her to say things about me. Nice, positive things about me.
"So when do you wanna hear this presentation?" Falco asked Link and Cloud, who both felt like answering no. "Wanna do it right now? Or how about later?"
"We'll let you know when we're ready," replied Link as he and Cloud exited the room. Any other person would've inferred that Link and Cloud just weren't interested, but Falco was convinced that the swordsmen just weren't prepared yet.
"I see...they must be trying to get themselves in an open mind," inferred Falco, minimizing the browser window before closing the laptop lid. "By around four o'clock or so, they should be ready."
"Falco? Are you done with your presentation yet?" Fox was heard calling out to his friend from down the hallway, as he caught Falco's attention. "We have a very special visitor coming soon!"
"A new talent?" Falco thought that Fox would stop signing talent after his talk with Tom Nook, but perhaps the pilot changed his mind. In a curious state of mind, Falco scooped up the laptop as he left Link's room.
With summer coming to an end, and fall officially underway, Popo's ice cream delivery business had come to an end. Granted, Nana crashing the van might've accelerated things; the Turks' Elena destroying Mechanica's machine was also a huge factor. But now delivering ice cream to the folks of Seattle and beyond now came to a close.
Popo met with his ice cream buddies - Nana, Sonic, Crash, Banjo, Kazooie, the Inklings, and Dante - in the meeting room, so they could go over the profits raised and all that jazz. The meeting was expected to be short and sweet and to the point, unless Popo chose to drag it out for nonsensical matters.
"First off, thank you all for coming today," Popo thanked everyone present in the meeting room, standing in front of a podium. Someone had to get the Ice Climber a stool so that he could look presentable. "To see you willingly attend means a lot to me."
"You literally had to bribe us to attend," stated the female Inkling, who along with the others was eating some candy. She in particular had a lollipop. "Hate to say that it worked like a charm..."
"Heh, what can I say...I know my peeps. Anyway, now that you're all here, I just wanted to go over the profits we raised while delivering ice cream."
"Question: how much of the funds do you plan on using for yourself?" asked Kazooie as she raised her hand. Popo looked at the redbird nervously with sweat running down his face, before looking down at the podium.
"...I must say, it has been a pleasure working with you guys. The progress we have made over time is nothing short of incredible."
"You still didn't answer my question." Kazooie was putting pressure on Popo, as Banjo had to shush his redbird companion. Still ignoring Kazooie's question, Popo grabbed the sheets of paper on his podium.
"Let's get to the numbers, shall we?" Popo cleared his throat, while also wiping away some sweat droplets from his forehead. "With the American dollars that we raised from delivering ice cream..."
"Including the pounds, yen, pesos, and all the other currencies..." stated Dante, reminding Popo of the number of funds generated from selling ice cream to the Olympians in Tokyo.
"Yes, that too...with all of that in mind...I can confidently say that we have reached our goal! Over $25,000! Foreign currencies included."
"Not bad, not bad!" Sonic nodded his head, as he and the others gave a round of applause. Kazooie, however, couldn't help but feel oddly skeptical about the number that was given.
"How come you didn't provide an exact number?" Kazooie questioned Popo, putting on even more pressure on the Ice Climber's shoulders. "Also, how much of this '$25,000' do you plan on spending just for yourself?"
"Can you please stop bothering Popo, Kazooie?" Banjo scolded the bird, as Popo got all sweaty again from the nervousness that overwhelmed him once more. "Your constant questioning is making him hot! Uh, unattractively, I mean..."
"Yes, it's getting quite hot in here..." remarked Popo as he fanned himself with his hand, despite not a single soul in the meeting room feeling an increase in body temperature. "...Sonic, would you be a dear, and open the curtains and the windows?"
"Can I be a buck instead?" Sonic asked Popo, who gave the blue hedgehog a frown. Sighing, Sonic got up out of his chair and went to the windows, and that's when he realized. "Wait a minute, this room doesn't have any curtains!"
"Whatever, just open the windows already!" So Sonic opened up one of the windows and then he saw something up in the sky. The hedgehog squinted his eyes, as he saw a ball heading his way.
"What is that supposed to be, a UFO?" Sonic poked his head out of the window, just so he could get a closer look at the spherical object heading his way. "Sure is moving fast...must be a..."
Sonic would soon be interrupted, as the ball crashed into the blue hedgehog and sent him down to the floor. Everyone looked on with shock and amazement, as the ball that crashed into Sonic had landed on the floor. Inside was a monkey.
"did someone break a table again?" inquired Sans as he entered the meeting room, holding a cup of coffee. "thought master hand made it clear that the tables weren't...for wrestling..." The skeleton trailed off, as he saw the monkey inside the ball jump out from his capsule.
"Eek eek! AiAi has arrived!" the monkey announced, landing on top of Sonic as he looked up at the heavens with his fist raised high. Sonic slowly lifted his head and saw AiAi standing on top of him.
"Huh, long time no see, AiAi," the blue hedgehog greeted the monkey before his head fell back on the floor. Seeing that Sonic was nearly down for the count, AiAi quickly hopped off of the blue hedgehog.
Sans: ah, yes, just what the mansion needs - some monkey business.
"Stand back, everyone! Not a single move!" Popo alerted the others, tossing his podium down on the floor as AiAi jumped away for his own safety. "We have an alien in our midst..."
"Relax, Popo, it's just a cute little monkey," Dante said to the Ice Climber, seeing AiAi as nothing more than a harmless threat. AiAi was simply too cute to have any action taken against him.
"A cute little monkey that came from outer space, perhaps! There's a fifty-fifty chance that he might be an evil alien..." Popo armed himself with his hammer, keeping himself on edge in case AiAi tried to pull something.
"Me, an alien?" AiAi asked in confusion as he pointed at himself. The monkey laughed off Popo's accusation afterward. "No way! I just wanted to stop by earth and collect some bananas."
"See, there it is! He's visiting our planet!" Popo was pointing accusingly at AiAi, his arm shaking as he feared what maneuver the monkey would pull off. "That right there is hard confirmation that he's an alien!"
"Lay off of him, will ya?" Nana shouted at Popo, as Sonic suddenly found the strength to stand back on his feet. "Even if he was an alien, it looks practically harmless!"
"Nana speaks the truth," stated Sonic, wincing gas he cracked his spine into place. That ball AiAi traveled in sure looked like it hurt. "AiAi is just a monkey who's only interested in bananas. He has no life other than that."
"I also have a wife and a kid!" added AiAi; the mere mention of AiAi's family brought up a particular fact to Sonic, which made the blue hedgehog almost burst out laughing. "My kid is from the future..."
"And his name...his name..." Sonic was trying to stifle his laughter, but it was no use. "...HIS NAME IS BABY!" The hedgehog burst out into a laughing fit afterward, as he fell on the floor laughing his butt off.
"So what happens when your son turns thirteen years old?" the male Inkling curiously asked AiAi, while Sonic was rolling on the floor laughing. "Would you rename him 'Teenager'?"
"...I honestly haven't even thought that far ahead yet," admitted AiAi; with such brilliant creativity, AiAi ought to rename his child 'Adult' once he reached the legal drinking age. Provided that monkeys of his kind could consume alcohol, of course.
"you wanna collect some bananas, is that right?" Sans asked AiAi as he came over to speak with the monkey, while Sonic finally ended his laughing fit. "well you came to the right place, my friend."
"Is the Seattle jungle nearby?" exclaimed AiAi, getting all excited as he clapped his hands together and rubbed them with much anticipation. "I've heard so many great things about it...it's why I came to this city in particular!"
"erm, no, but there's a place that's even better. the yiga Clan hideout - it has all the bananas that you could ever want, and then some."
"The cult that lives there are a bunch of freaks, but they're nice company once you get to know them," added Dante, assuming that AiAi would hit it right off the bat with Master Kohga. "We would take you there, but we have a meeting..."
"Not anymore we do!" announced Popo, willing to put the meeting on hold. "We're taking AiAi to the hideout, and we're gonna get him some bananas!"
"But you were accusing him of being an alien just a few moments ago," Kazooie said to Popo, wondering why the Ice Climber was suddenly changing his tune. "Can't we just finish the meeting?"
"Kazooie, I'm ashamed...how can you be so insensitive? AiAi here wants to have some bananas - and yet you wish to deny him of such opportunity? Moments like these don't happen for him every day, you know!"
"For shame, Kazooie...for shame," Banjo shook his head at the redbird, as Crash too was shaking his head in disappointment. Giving up all hope, Kazooie rolled her eyes and facepalmed.
"The Yiga Clan hideout is quite literally in our backyard," Sonic explained to AiAi, as he increased the monkey's excitement level by tenfold. "If we can just get on the clan leader's good side, he'll give you all the bananas that you could ever want..."
AiAi was in town, but little did he know that his archnemesis had tracked him to the Emerald City. As Red the Pokemon Trainer was outside in the front yard with his Ivysaur, a baboon dressed as an evil scientist was peeking from behind a tree.
"Alright, Ivysaur, use Razor Leaf on that target in front of you!" commanded Red, as Ivysaur fired a Razor Leaf at the target in front of him. The baboon hiding behind the tree conspicuously eyed the mansion.
"He must've found a way inside..." he observed, as he saw a hole in one of the meeting room windows. The baboon made a run for it, only to bump into Red by accident. "...oh my! My apologies, good sir."
"Master Hand! A Zarude sneaked out of the Pokemon sanctuary!" Red called out to the giant hand, as the baboon quickly scurried away to avoid being caught. "Wait a minute, the sanctuary doesn't even have a Zarude..."
Master Hand: "A Zarude sneaked out of the Pokemon sanctuary..." *laughs* ...what a fool Red is. Simply put, mythical Pokemon are too dangerous to be kept in the sanctuary. They can either kill you, put you in a deep sleep, or even take things out of your living space like some old bitter grandpa. Shaymin, she gets a pass...but if I see her killing anyone in cold blood (which I personally wouldn't mind seeing, mainly for the hilarity of it), then Sonic can kiss her goodbye.
Having been spotted, the baboon ran over to Mario's house, clinging to the side of the house. For a moment, he thought that he was in the clear, until...
"This is where I saw the termites go in," Peach said to Mario as she led her husband to the side of the house, from the backyard. "And are you sure that your spiky shell will kill them?"
"It's way cheaper than an exterminator," replied Mario as the baboon tried to make a run for it, only to trip and fall. "I'm telling you, Peach, this spiky green-a shell can save lives."
"Drat! Double drat!" the baboon frowned as he banged on fists on the ground, as Mario and Peach came over. The married couple stopped and saw the baboon, who was still brooding.
"Should-a we call animal protective services?" Mario asked Peach, not sure what to make of some random being baboon near his house. The moment that Mario mentioned animal protective services, the baboon quickly sprung up.
"No! Wait! Don't make the call!" the baboon alerted Mario and Peach, surprising them with his ability to speak. Given that he was wearing clothes, it shouldn't be too surprising in the slightest. "I can explain. My name is Dr. Bad-Boon, and I am from the..."
"He's wearing a monocle...he must be evil!" assumed Peach as she took out her trusty frying pan. Dr. Bad-Boon backed away, as Peach inched closer towards the baboon with a mean look in her eyes.
"You got it wrong again! Yes, I am evil...but the monocle has nothing to do with it! It's a fashion choice!" But Peach refused to listen, as she screamed and ran towards Dr. Bad-Boon. Dr. Bad-Boon ran for his life, screaming as Peach chased him away.
"Peach, come-a back!" Mario called out to his wife, watching as she chased Dr. Bad-Boon across the road. Mario sighed...only for his spirits to be lifted when he saw a truck that he recognized pass by. "Ooh...could it be?"
Mario watched as the truck pulled up into the mansion's driveway, before making his way over to the truck. The plumber waited patiently, as three individuals got out of the truck - Alex, Ryan, and Steph. A trio of friends who made a road trip to Seattle just a few episodes ago.
"Friends, welcome back!" Mario happily greeted Alex and company after they exited the truck, not even giving them a chance to settle down. "How I've missed-a you..."
"Keep on walking..." Ryan whispered to Alex and Steph, as he and his friends picked up the pace. But Mario was one step ahead, as he ran ahead of the three friends and stood in front of them to stop their progress.
"C'mon, is this-a how you treat a friend? Bring it on-a in!" Mario stretched his arms out wide as he walked over to Alex and company, who were less than inviting for a hug.
"No thanks, we're not interested," smiled Alex as she and the others backed away from Mario, only for Mario to reach the friends and give them a hug. Alex and company were left with no choice but to hug Mario back.
"This is...so awkward," remarked Steph, feeling like she had to compensate a lot for Mario's short height. It almost felt like Mario wasn't even a part of the hug, to begin with! Fortunately for Steph, the hug came to an end a few seconds later.
"So, what brings-a you three back to town?" Mario asked the three friends from Haven Springs, as the sound of Peach screaming was faintly heard in the background. "On another road-a trip, I assume?"
"Guess you could say that..." Ryan replied with a sigh, before looking over at Steph. "...though Steph here had somewhat of a final say." Feeling proud of herself - and maybe a little justified - Steph flashed a smile.
Ryan: Haven Springs is having a bit of a sewage situation at the moment; a bunch of raw sewage is getting in the water, and it's created quite the mess. We were supposed to stay out of town until the problem subsided, but I was hoping that we would at least stay in Colorado. Apparently, Steph had other plans...
Steph: So the last time I was in Seattle, I met that puppet guy Geno at the arcade. He was pretty chill, for the most part - we were having a discussion about Dungeons and Dragons, which surprised me because he didn't look like the kind of dude that would be interested in stuff like that. We chatted for a long time...wish he went on longer if it meant saving me from Mona's "crush". *shudders* Anyway, I promised Geno that we would play Dungeons and Dragons once I was back in Seattle...and here we are.
"We're just stopping by the mansion to play some Dungeons and Dragons," Steph explained to Mario, who suddenly taken a keen interest in playing tabletop games. "Should be pretty fun."
"Ooh! I love Dungeons and Dragons!" exclaimed Mario, as Steph and company had a very hard time telling if the plumber was being genuine or not. "One-a of my favorite pastimes. Play it all the time-a with my three-year-old."
"Isn't Dungeons and Dragons too advanced for a toddler?" questioned Ryan - if Jennifer was far advanced beyond her years, the answer to that question would be a solid no. "Also, you don't look like the kind of guy that would play those kinds of games."
"But I do play those-a kind of games! My favorite character to use in Dungeons and Dragons is, uh...Draco Malfoy, the Dark Lord...Dragon Slayer! Draco Malfoy the Fourth, I should-a say."
"Sounds like you've never played tabletop games in your life," assumed Alex, as she and her friends walked past Mario en route to the mansion. "It was nice speaking with you again, Mario."
"Wait, come back! I also have an elfin-a huntress who's at level 100!" Mario's attempt did not work, as Alex and company had already entered the mansion. Mario sighed, worried about feeling left out.
"No one told me that the mansion was having guests over today," said a certain princess, as Mario turned around and saw Peach. Peach was back to her normal happy self, no longer incensed. "Are those three new interns for the documentary crew?"
"Nope, they're just some-a friends of mine from Colorado." Mario looked back at the mansion's front door - as if he expected Alex and company to come back outside and invite him over for some tabletop shenanigans. "Where's that baboon-a you beat up?"
"Somewhere nearby. I hope that I didn't beat his head too far in with my frying pan. Hee hee!"
Peach had left Dr. Bad-Boon for dead in the backyard of the Assist Tower, leaving the baboon with multiple bruises on his head. Dr. Bad-Boon was writhing in pain as Knuckle Joe and Lakitu appeared outside.
"Told you that banshees exist," Knuckle Joe said to Lakitu, only to be met with great disappointment when he and the Koopa saw Dr. Bad-Boon lying face-first on the ground. "Aw phooey, it's just a stinking baboon..."
"Pay up, mister," Lakitu said to Knuckle Joe as he held out his hand; Knuckle Joe grumbled as he dug into his imaginary pocket and pulled out a couple of dollar bills.
"My aching head..." wailed Dr. Bad-Boon, holding his head and slowly getting back on his feet as Knuckle Joe handed Lakitu his money. Rubbing his head to nurse the pain, Dr. Bad-Boon saw the tower denizens in his midst.
"Yikes, man...you must've got hit in the head pretty good!" Knuckle Joe said to Dr. Bad-Boon, who adjusted his monocle and tidied up his hair. "Let me guess - - Peach's frying pan?"
"Is this Peach the same lady who tried to kill me because of my monocle?" inquired Dr. Bad-Boon, as Knuckle Joe and Lakitu exchanged looks before nodding their heads. "I will have my revenge on her later..."
"Uh, good luck with that, buddy," replied Lakitu, before inferring that Dr. Bad-Boon was evil just based on his looks. Unlike Peach, he didn't have a strong urge to beat Dr. Bad-Boon senselessly. "Don't mind if I ask, but...are you evil?"
"Why yes, I am evil! Is it not obvious? I came to this wretched city to enact my evil plan of kidnapping AiAi's love and taking her for myself."
"...and then what?" asked Knuckle Joe, hoping that there was more to Dr. Bad-Boon's evil plan than just kidnapping some monkey's wife.
"What do you mean, 'and then what'? That's it, that's my evil plan! I would steal some bananas on the side, but maybe another time..."
"That is such a lousy evil plan, the lousiest that I've ever heard." To Knuckle Joe and Lakitu, Dr. Bad-Boon's evil plan sounded more befitting of a jealous ex-boyfriend than some evil mastermind.
"Well, it's MY lousy evil plan! And I traveled back in time just to put it into action!" Dr. Bad-Boon traveled back in time just to steal AiAi's girl? Talk about some dedication.
Lakitu: I'm sorry, but who would travel back in time just to kidnap a girl? Who is already married, mind you? That is a kind of desperation that I don't think even Bowser himself would pull off.
"I'm going to get AiAi's lover, MeeMee, one way or another," vowed Dr. Bad-Boon, as two shining comets appeared high up in the sky. Or at least they appeared to be comets. "Then I'll destroy AiAi, for good measure..."
"Look at that!" shouted Lakitu as he pointed up at the two comets, grabbing the attention of Knuckle and Joe and Dr. Bad-Boon as they both looked up. "Those comets look like they're coming this way."
"That must be MeeMee and AiAi...or even Gorgon! Either way, MeeMee will be coming straight to me..." Smiling and rubbing his hands together, Dr. Bad-Boon hopped away, greatly anticipating MeeMee's arrival.
"What is wrong with that guy...?" Knuckle Joe asked Lakitu, who shrugged in response as he couldn't even think of a single suitable answer.
When Zelda established that the sauna was open for everyone, it brought up an interesting question - what about the beauty salon? If men and women alike can share the sauna, then surely they could do the same at the beauty salon, which was mostly restricted to the female residents. After much thinking, Zelda decided to let the men use the beauty salon without scrutiny, making it fully open to men and women alike. Some ladies detested the decision.
Regardless, Zelda's word was set in stone, and the male residents were free to use the beauty salon as they pleased. For instance, Kazuya was in the salon with Heihachi, giving his dad a head massage as he sat in a shampoo chair.
"After you're done with the head, can I get a back massage?" Heihachi kindly asked Kazuya, as he felt the tension in his head fading away thanks to Kazuay's strong yet gentle hands. His head had never felt so relaxed before.
"As you wish, father," Kazuya replied with a smile - a smile that seemed to be hiding a lot of evil intent. Rosalina and Samus were looking on at the Mishimas distastefully, with the latter shaking her head.
"We seriously let the beauty salon open to the guys for this?" frowned Samus, who had tried to talk some sense into Zelda regarding her decision about the beauty salon. Nothing she said worked on the princess.
"If these two weren't father and son, I'd have a lot of questions right now," remarked Rosalina, as Link and Cloud entered the beauty salon. Felt good for the swordsmen to enter the salon without being questioned upon arrival.
"There he goes again..." grumbled Link as he and Cloud saw Kazuya massaging Heihachi's head. Link and Cloud knew that Kazuya was up to no good, and it was only a matter of finding the right time to expose Kazuya.
"Oh! Link!" Rosalina exclaimed when she saw the Hylian, as she made her way over to him and Cloud. "Just wanted to tell you about Ganondorf. He hasn't been quite himself as of late..."
"Does it have to do with him being the wedding officiant?" Indeed that was the case, as Rosalina solemnly nodded her head. "You should tell him to stop taking it so personally."
"I would, but...it's hard. He's threatening to kill everyone associated with the wedding ceremony out of spite. Including you too, Cloud."
"Nice going, Link - you managed to tick off an evil demon lord in the worst way possible," Cloud said to the Hylian, who was having some remorse over the distress that he brought upon Ganondorf. "Trying to get everybody killed, huh?"
"That was never the intent..." replied Link, fearing that he might be at the very top of Ganondorf's hit list. The possibility of being strangled by Zelda was also another frightening thought that crossed his mind.
"He's been in a very sour mood since the bachelor party. I'd hate for him to have an angry fit, and possibly kill someone in the..."
Suddenly two round objects crashed through the ceiling, crashing into Link and Cloud and nearly sending them to the floor. The two swordsmen caught the objects in the nick of time and saw that they were balls, resembling the one that AiAi traveled in.
"Eek eek!" squealed the monkey inside the ball that Link was holding, sporting a pink flower and a skirt. The monkey in the ball that Cloud was holding was a bit muscular and fittingly wore a tank top.
"What the..." uttered Link, as the two monkeys hopped right out of their balls. The monkeys then started messing around with Link, as the monkey with the tank top climbed up on Link and grabbed his green hat.
"Everyone sure loves taking your hat," Cloud said to Link, who tried to catch the burly monkey only for him to hop away. The monkey wearing the skirt reached down into Link's pants and pulled on his underwear, giving him a wedgie.
"Hey, cut that out!" shouted Link, walking awkwardly in pain as he struggled to reach the monkey on his back. Rosalina and Samus were both laughing at the Hylian, while Cloud smirked. "It's not that funny, you guys!"
"I'd say this is a worthy comeuppance," said Samus, as the skirt-wearing monkey brought Link down to the floor and started hopping on his back. The monkey sounds from the beauty salon caught the attention of Tails, who came inside to investigate.
"What's with the monkey sounds, did Dixie finally respond to Diddy's...text?" the yellow fox asked as he entered the beauty salon, only to see the two monkeys messing around with Link. Cloud was virtually untouched.
"Such a funny-looking dress you're wearing!" the skirt-wearing monkey said to Link as she tugged on the Hylian's tunic. Link tried to fight the monkey off of him, but the burly monkey had him pinned down.
"It's not a dress, it's a tunic!" shouted a highly-offended Link, as Rosalina and Samus continued to giggle at the Hylian's expense. "What would you know about fashion, you're just a stinking monkey..."
"MeeMee? Gongon?" Tails called out to the two monkeys, who stopped monkeying around once they heard their names called. MeeMee and Gongon hopped off of Link, who felt his underwear in places where it shouldn't be.
"About time we got some familiar company!" exclaimed Gongon, as Cloud helped Link up to his feet seeing that the coast was now clear. "It's been a while, hasn't it?"
"I'd say so. You guys are still as zany as ever!" Tails shared a friendly embrace with MeeMee and Gongon, as Link was disgusted by the change in demeanor from the two primates that harassed him relentlessly.
Tails: Last time I saw MeeMee and Gongon was at some SEGA party, months before the documentary started. I remember AiAi bringing this giant banana souffle for dessert, and Sonic trying to eat it all by himself. The aftermath was kinda ugly - Sonic needed like twelve gallons of Pepto Bismol just to get his stomach to work properly again.
Another monkey would join in on the fun, as a third ball came flying through the ceiling. This one struck Heihachi in the head, smacking him in the face.
"Father! No!" shouted Kazuya, as Heihachi fell out of the chair and got down on one knee. The monkey that was inside the ball hopped out of his spherical contraption, with a binky in his mouth.
"Look, Gongon! It's Baby!" MeeMee squealed as she ran over to her infant son and picked him up, embracing him in her loving arms. "I was worried that you wouldn't make it..."
"Baby? The kid's name is Baby?" asked an extremely baffled Link, almost at a complete loss for words. "Why would his own parents do him like that?"
"Poor guy's gonna have it rough when he grows up," remarked Cloud, watching as MeeMee was rubbing Baby's face against hers. "Bet he won't even make it past public monkey school. If it exists."
"There's only three of us so far," MeeMee said to Tails as she came over to the yellow fox, holding Baby in her caring arms. "We're only missing AiAi; he got a head start before any of us were ready."
"That's AiAi for ya," chuckled Tails, knowing AiAi's eagerness far too well. AiAi was seldom lacking in energy. "He might've arrived already; Sonic might know where he is."
"Does that mean you'll be taking those monkeys away?" Link asked Tails, as he was looking at the monkeys with almost heavy disdain. "The further those primates are away from me, the better..."
"You have to excuse Link - he doesn't have the best luck with monkeys," Cloud said to MeeMee and Gongon, as Link folded his arms and looked the other way while frowning. "Unless their surname is Kong."
"The Kongs...they're debatable." The monkeys at Faron Woods might have something to do with Link's bitterness - even if their leader, Ook, was controlled by a parasite at the time.
"I promise we'll be out of your way," Tails assured Link and Cloud, as he and the monkeys departed from the beauty salon. Meanwhile, Heihachi was helped up to his feet by Kazuya, as he rubbed his face in pain.
"Blindsided by a wretched ball..." growled Heihachi as he looked down at the ball that Baby traveled in, which was resting on the floor. Heihachi kicked the ball away in anger, watching as it rolled away.
"Don't take your anger out on that contraption," Kazuya advised Heihachi, who was looking for a face to punch, punchable or not. Link and Cloud were both unfortunate candidates. "It's that monkey you're after. He did this to you."
"A monkey tried to break my face?" Heihachi might not have seen Baby when he appeared out of the ball, but Kazuya sure did. "It will be the end of him!"
"Indeed. How about we put this message session on hold, and give that monkey a piece of our mind?" So Kazuya and Heihachi left the beauty salon together, both men having some monkey brutality in their eyes.
"They're really about to go beat up an innocent baby..." said Samus, shortly after Kazuya and Heihachi, as she tried her hardest to be surprised. "...can't say that I expected anything less from the Mishimas. I'd pay good money to see them go through with it."
"This is horrible!" fretted Rosalina, as she turned to the two dudes who would save the day - Link and Cloud. "You can't let those two get away with this."
"Eh, I'm sure that Tails can fend the Mishimas off," said Link, not wanting anything to do with the monkeys, as Rosalina and Cloud frowned at the Hylian. Link sighed seconds later. "This is what I get for being a leader..."
"And a mediator," added Cloud, walking away as Link was left with no choice but to follow after the swordsman. "Come on, let's get this over with."
"I hope that they can get to Kazuya and Heihachi in time," Rosalina said concerning Link and Cloud, confident that the duo would get the job done. The mother of Lumas then turned towards Samus, who had a funny look on her face. "Something wrong, Samus?"
"Oh, no...just remembered something," replied Samus as she went back to her normal visage, leaving Rosalina rather curious. "Something that I meant to say to Link. I'll just save it for later..."
Link: Kazuya and Heihachi might be teaming up to beat up some monkey's infant child...for some odd reason, but Cloud and I know that Kazuya's got a trick up his sleeve. I don't know if he's leading Heihachi on before stabbing him in the back, but I got my tabs open. As for Ganondorf...guess I'll have to be on the lookout for him as well. Don't want to die before the wedding, you know what I mean?
His cafe experiment at the sauna cut short due to Pit and others crashing Link's bachelor party, Joker was back to serving coffee and curry at the usual spot, Cafe Leblanc. The experiment didn't last long enough to warrant any feedback, but Joker was happy regardless to be back at his old digs.
"And then I was like, pew, pew, pew!" Cuphead told Geno, making gunshot sounds as he told the star about his laser tag exploits last week. "That old lady didn't want any trouble, so she ran off like the coward that she was."
"Why was there an old lady playing laser tag?" asked a concerned Geno, believing that the flashing lights involved in laser tag would be a turn-off for any senior citizen. "The other team must've been desperate."
"Actually, the old lady was pretty decent! Falco said that she had Heihachi on the ropes until Kazuya came in and eliminated her."
"Intimidated by a grandma...well, now I know that Heihachi isn't as mighty as he claims to be." Soon Pit drew close to Geno, causing the star to pull his head back as his personal space was violated.
"Why do you come here often, Geno?" asked Pit as a perplexed Geno eyed around the cafe. "Not like you can consume the stuff we offer. You like watching up-close mukbangs, or something?"
"I just like stopping by the cafe for some camaraderie. And for the conversation. Lots of interesting things that I don't hear about anywhere else."
"Oh, so you must be some kind of gossip girl!" Geno had absolutely no idea how to respond to that. "I've never met a male variant before, so I should probably consider myself lucky.
"Here he is!" announced Isabelle, as she brought the trio of friends Alex, Ryan, and Steph to Cafe Leblanc. "Sitting right at the counter." Geno turned around and was startled to see Steph in the cafe.
"What's up?" Steph greeted Geno, walking over to the star as she took out the bag that she brought along with her on the trip. "Bet you didn't expect to see me today."
"Hey, Steph...you showed up a lot earlier than I expected," responded Geno, as Steph was taking out a bunch of Dungeons and Dragons-related stuff. Things like dice, character sheets, figurines, and all that jazz.
"Yeah, well...the sewage situation back at Haven Springs kinda forced my hand." Now's the perfect time for some Dungeons and Dragons fun...got all the stuff we need."
"This is who we're going to play with?" Ryan asked Steph, as he was looking at Geno in a rather skeptical manner. "Some funny puppet dude wearing a cape?"
"He doesn't look that bad," Alex replied with a shrug, as Pit was paying close attention to the stuff that Steph was placing on the cafe counter. The angel, entranced, picked up one of the figurines.
"This sure is one weird-looking dragon," observed Pit as he was holding a figure of what appeared to be some half-human, half-demon being. "Or is this just his human form?"
"That's called a cambion - it's an offspring of a human and a demon," Steph explained to Pit as he snatched the figurine away from the angel. "If you ever played Dungeons and Dragons, you would know..."
"Pit, can you please get back to work?" Joker pleaded to the angel, as he was preparing a bowl of curry just in case Steph and her friends wanted any. "Let our visitors have their fun."
"You know, if you never played this game before, I can show you the ropes." Steph rolled some dice over to Pit, giving the angel a big enough smile to potentially reel him in. Evaluating his options, Pit looked at Steph, and then back at Joker.
"Don't you even think about it..." Joker was looking at Pit like a stern parent, as he had the angel second-guessing himself. Pit turned back at Steph and saw all the figurines and character sheets that were present on the counter.
"This might be your one and only chance..." Steph said to Pit, who had sweat running down his face as he had to make a decision soon. What will Pit decide?
"Pit, how many times have I told you to not wash your tuxedo?" Viridi asked the angel as she entered the cafe, holding a small-sized tuxedo. "For the last time, your tux is not washer machine-safe!"
"I GOT IT!" Pit jumped over the counter and ran over to Viridi, putting his arm around her shoulder. "What if, we play Dungeons and Dragons in teams?"
"Who is this 'we' that you speak of?" questioned Joker, frowning at Pit while Steph appeared intrigued by Pit's proposal. "This is not what I asked for."
"You know, I think we can make this whole team thing work," said Steph as she looked up at Alex and Ryan, who were both also intrigued to an extent. "I'm game. How about you guys?"
"Sounds unique, I'll give it that," replied Ryan as Joker, feeling like the odd man out, was completely beside himself. "I would give it a try."
"You and your friends, versus me, Viridi, and Joker, versus Geno and two partners of his choosing," Pit explained to Steph, designating a team battle with three teams of three duking it out. "Should be an absolute banger!"
Pit: Never played Dungeons and Dragons a day in my life, but it sounds pretty fun in practice. Just crafting your own mythical creature, and giving them all the best abilities and powers that you can think of. You get to make them super overpowered, and no one else will give you crap for it. It's ingenious!
Joker: Can't believe that I'm going to forfeit another valuable day doing business at the cafe to play some tabletop games. My biggest fear is that Pit might drag me and Viridi down. He's the very opposite of a team player. He's more like a team cancer!
"Eh, I honestly would've preferred to play with just three people," remarked Geno, who was looking forward to just playing Dungeons and Dragons with Steph and her friends. "But nine people on board will making things exciting, I guess."
"Need me to recruit your teammates, Geno?" asked Isabelle, who remained at the cafe as she came over to speak with the star. "You can always ask me to join your team, you know..."
"No thanks, Isabelle - I'm only interested in winning." An unexpected savage moment from Geno, which left poor Isabelle in shambles. "But I do have two folks in mind..."
With AiAi having a strong hankering for bananas, the ice cream gang took the monkey to the Yiga Clan hideout, where a boundless amount of bananas awaited him. The only challenge, however, was getting Master Kohga to sacrifice the bananas that he adored so much.
"Our humble leader is still taking a bath," a Yiga clansman said to the group, as they waited outside Master Kohga's throne. "Give him five minutes or so, he'll be done in no time."
"But we've been waiting here for almost half an hour!" complained Kazooie, pulling her wings out of Banjo's backpack as she grabbed the Yiga clansman and strangled him. "We demand to see Master Kohga NOW!"
"It's not like I can make him bathe any faster!" The Yiga clansman tried to pull Kazooie's hands away, but the redbird's grip was stronger than he expected. "He'll be out shortly..."
"That's what you said almost ten minutes ago! Tell him to hurry up!" As Kazooie continued to strangle the Yiga clansman, a bunch of Yiga footsoldiers appeared out of nowhere like ninjas, armed with their sickles.
"Is there a problem?" one of the footsoldiers asked the group, as Kazooie stopped choking the Yiga clansman. One good look at Kazooie made the footsoldier and his men back off. "Oh no...not her..."
"What's the matter, punk? You want some too?!" Letting go of the Yiga clansman, Kazooie hopped out of Banjo's backpack and chased the footsoldiers around. "Come get some!"
"Stop, Kazooie, we've already been through this!" Banjo yelled at his friend as he chased after her, hoping to bring her down. The Yiga clansman, down on one knee, massaged his neck as Dante helped him up to his feet.
"She's more feisty than she looks," Dante informed the Yiga clansman about Kazooie, who was scaring the Yiga footsoldiers away. "Just be glad that she didn't choke you out..."
"Ah, so fresh and clean!" Master Kohga rejoiced with overwhelming joy as he appeared from his throne, wearing nothing but his mask and a towel around his waist. The clan leader saw his footsoldiers being harrassed by Kazooie, with Banjo holding on to Kazooie for dear life to bring her down.
"Uh, hi, Master Kohga!" Popo awkwardly greeted the clan leader, who was perplexed by the scene unfolding before him. "We brought a guest along, who loves bananas just as much as you do. Say hi, AiAi!"
"Hi, Master Master Kohga, I love bananas!" greeted AAi, as Sonic brought the monkey over to Master Kohga. Kohga saw the banana shirt that AiAi was wearing, and was more than ready to be that monkey's BFF.
"Yes, we get it, you love bananas...stop being so one-dimensional. Anyway, Master Kohga, AiAi came to this city looking for some bananas to eat..."
"What a coincidence - I love eating bananas too!" exclaimed Master Kohga as he pried AiAi away from Sonic and embraced him in a hug, holding him like a huggable teddy bear. "Such a relatable creature he is."
"Can you let me finish? Since AiAi wants to eat some bananas, we were wondering if he would have a few from your stash."
"Oh my..." the Yiga clansman that was strangled by Kazooie said with many worries, as Master Kohga looked serious as he placed AiAi back on the ground.
"You want this monkey to eat some bananas...from my growing collection of bananas?" asked a baffled Master Kohga, before bursting into a small laughing fit. "I don't know what you're talking about!"
"C'mon dude, we all know that you have a secret place where you hide your bananas," Sonic said to Master Kohga, who chuckled very nervously in response. "My pet Shaymin even found it herself!"
"She has?!" Master Kohga looked stunned at first, only to shake his head. "Your Shaymin must've been imagining things. We have no secret stash."
"Um, yes we do," stated the Yiga clansman, as Master Kohga quickly looked towards his underling wishing for him to shut up. "Master Kohga's just in denial about it because of how overprotective he is."
Yiga Clansmen: The secret stash is totally legit, and most of us know where Master Kohga is hiding it at. The thing is, we're forbidden to eat a single banana from the stash. But I was close, though. That night, I felt some pain between my legs in my sleep, and the next morning I found out that my chances at fatherhood were very slim. I'll let you guys figure it out.
"Give me the bananas NOW!" yelled AiAi, as he was turning into a spoiled brat. Master Kohga couldn't let AiAi throw a temper tantrum, and knew that something had to give.
"Okay, fine, I'll give you some bananas..." Master Kohga conceded, ending AiAi's tantrum as he had the monkey's full attention. "...but only on ONE condition. You must pass my super-duper ultra-difficult never-before-cleared obstacle course!"
"Do you even have one of those at your lair?" the female Inkling asked Master Kohga, who was laughing to himself with some purely evil intentions. "I take it that's a yes..."
"Silly Inkling child...you have no idea of the kind of things I do in my spare time. Aside from hosting tea parties with discovered toy dolls." Master Kohga rubbed his hands together delightfully, as he walked away. "I'll go get the obstacle course ready."
"You're pretty lucky, monkey dude," the Yiga clansman said to AiAi, as he couldn't help but feel some sort of jealousy towards the monkey. "Master Kohga never lets his own men near that secret stash..."
"After AiAi gets his bananas, can we get back to that meeting?" Nana asked Popo, having to remind the Ice Climber of the meeting that he was somewhat eager to put on hold. "I reckon you still have a bit more to discuss."
"...in due time," Popo replied, albeit with a noticeable lack of confidence, as Nana furrowed her brow in intrigue. Popo was holding off on the meeting, but for what reason?
With AiAi at the Yiga Clan lair, MeeMee and Gongon were with Tails, hoping to find out the whereabouts of their monkey companion. The monkeys were in the gaming room, where Tails was speaking with Sans.
"those guys and gals selling ice cream took him to the yiga clan's place," Sans informed Tails, providing the yellow fox details of AiAi's current location. "you probably why."
"Figures...thanks for the tip, Sans," Tails thanked the skeleton before turning his attention to MeeMee, Gongon, and Baby, who had ripped one of the gaming room couches to shreds. "Let's go, you two."
"Okay!" squealed MeeMee, as she and Gongon followed Tails out of the gaming room. Shortly after they left, Link and Cloud suddenly emerged.
"Those monkeys have no respect whatsoever..." Link shook his head as he analyzed the damage that was done to the couch. Mr. Game and Watch came over and saw the damaged couch, as he groaned.
Sans: The two monkeys sure went bananas on that couch. *snickers* at least they didn't destroy a sofa. sofa, so good.
"Well, now we know where they're headed," stated Cloud, as Mr. Game and Watch grabbed a nearby broom and swept up the cotton on the floor. "The Yiga Clan hideout sounds like the most obvious place they would go. As for the Mishimas..."
"Link, Link, Link...we meet again," Falco said to Link, as he and Fox both entered the gaming room to confront the Hylian. And Cloud too, but only because of mere association.
"Not right now, Falco, I'm busy," Link said to the avian pilot, seeing that he had the laptop in his possession. "I don't have time for your crappy PowerPoint presentation."
"How do you know it's crappy if you haven't even seen it yet?" Fox questioned Link, wondering where the Hylian's manners were. "That's no way to disrespect your officiant."
"Falco isn't the officiant. Ganondorf is. And if Ganondorf no-shows, or anything else? Pac-Man gets to officiate the wedding. NO ands, ifs, or buts about it."
"We had a feeling you would say that...which is why I brought the big guns! Kazuma Kiryu, come on in!"
Fox whistled into his fingers, as a Japanese man wearing a white suit entered the gaming room turning a few heads. Link and Cloud had their full attention on this Japanese man, who had assisted Fox, Falco, and Diddy a few years ago in Tokyo.
"Link and Cloud...this is Kazuma Kiryu," Fox introduced the swordsman to Kazuma, whose presence Link and Cloud found slightly intimidating. "He's a member of a famous yakuza group in Japan."
"He can also beat you up in a real street fight," added Falco, as Kazuma adjusted his collar and cracked his knuckles while staring down Link and Cloud. "Better go easy on him..."
"It was all thanks to this dude that we saved Donkey Kong from Miss Shimazaki." Fox placed his hand on Kazuma's shoulder, feeling as if he was absorbing the yakuza's macho powers. "Good thing I still had him on speed dial..."
Fox: Falco thinks that a presentation is gonna sway Link's mind, but obviously he'll need much more than that. Remember, kids: always bring a yakuza on board when your friend is looking for an opportunity.
"I heard that you were having a wedding soon," Kazuma said to Link as he stepped closer towards the Hylian. "Is that correct?"
"Uh, yes...October 15th," Link answered meekly, gulping nervously as he found Kazuma too close for comfort. October 15th, save the date. "If you're asking for an invite, then you're out of luck..."
"I'm not looking for an invite. I'm looking for an opportunity. For him." Kazuma pointed at Falco, who was smirking at Link as he nodded his head. "How about you give him what he wants?"
"No thanks, I already made my decision." With Link refusing to budge, Kazuma grabbed the Hylian by his collar and hoisted him up in the air. "Cloud, why are you just standing there?! Do something!"
"I'm not getting punched in the face," said Cloud, seeing how Kazuma was able to lift up Link without any trouble. He clearly didn't want the smoke.
"I am going to give you two options," Kazuma told Link, who found it a struggle to fight out of the Yazuka's grasp. "Either you hear Mr. Lombardi out...or I will snap your limbs into next week!"
"Do I really have to give Falco a chance?" whined Link, causing Kazuma to tighten his grip on the Hylian as he squeezed his neck. "Okay, fine, I'll watch that stupid PowerPoint of his!"
"Excellent choice..." Kazuma placed Link back on his feet, as he got the answer that he and the pilots wanted. "...I'm positive that Falco will present himself as a viable choice."
"Right on, brother," Fox said to Kazuma, glad that the yakuza was able to come through. Just getting him to Seattle was a miracle in itself. "So where do you wanna do your presentation, Falco?"
"The movie room's our best bet," answered Falco as he took out the laptop, making sure that he had the PowerPoint presentation loaded up. "The big screen will make the slide transitions pop out more."
"You guys have fun with Link," Cloud said to Falco and company as he walked away, leaving his best friend behind. He sure loved doing that to Link. "I have some business to attend to with Kazuya and his dad..."
"Kazuya? As in, Kazuya Mishima?" inquired Kazuma, who found the name all too familiar as he furrowed his brow. Something about that name brought back some bad memories. "That wretched scoundrel..."
"Easy, buddy...you can worry about Kazuya later," Falco assured Kazuma as he came over to soothe the yakuza. Kazuma eased his emotions, as Cloud left the gaming room. "We got bigger fish to fry!"
"Yes, of course. To the movie room, we shall go." As Kazuma and the pilots made their exit, Link stood behind heaving a heavy sigh. A part of him now wished that Falco hadn't crashed his bachelor party.
"This had better be quick..." the Hylian grumbled as he followed after Kazuma and his boys, forcing himself to keep a relatively open mind.
Dungeons and Dragons - which was attended to be a four-person affair - now had nine people involved, all of them playing at Cafe Leblanc. There would be three teams of three involved. One team had Steph, Alex, and Ryan; another team consisted of Pit, Viridi, and Joker; and the third included Geno and two persons of his choosing. One of them being the Luminary.
"These creatures are more grotesque than the ones I fought in the past," the Luminary observed, as he was busy inspecting the figurines one by one. "Didn't think that would be possible!"
"What can I say, the designers have some wicked imaginations," remarked Steph, double-checking to make sure that all the Dungeons and Dragons materials were present. "Geno, do you have a third person for your team?"
"Yes, he should be coming soon," replied Geno, who sounded awfully afraid in his tone. Could be that the star was having second doubts. "He's known for showing up fashionably late."
Geno: I kinda wanted Cloud, but predictably he was busy at the moment. So I had to settle for his...arch-nemesis.
"Hope that you all are looking forward to some despair..." a certain one-winged angel snarled, as Sephiroth arrived at the cafe, holding a plate that had a wide variety of chips. And some dip. "...also brought some snacks."
"How very thoughtful of you, Sephiroth," Joker said insincerely to the one-winged angel, before leaning in close to Pit and whispering, "This is going to be your fault soon..."
"If these snacks poison us, then I'm forever blaming Pit," Ryan admitted to Alex as Sephiroth brought the chips over. From the looks of it, the chips didn't look that threatening...but looks can be deceiving.
"Can't blame someone if you're already dead," Alex smirked in response, taking one of the chips and eating it much to Ryan's surprise. A brave soul she was.
"Seems like everyone's here, which means the fun can now begin!" Steph announced after Sephiroth took a seat. "Everyone take a sheet." The young woman took out a couple of character sheets and passed them around.
"So we just fill these out?" asked Viridi, only to look around and see Geno and Steph filling out the character sheet for their team. "I guess so..." Viridi started filling out the character sheet for her team, making things up as she went along.
"Name him Arsene," Joker whispered into Viridi's ear, as Viriid nodded and jotted the name "Arsene" at the very top.
"Hey Steph, can we give our character a million hit points?" asked Pit, who wanted nothing more than to make his D&D character the most overpowered being to have ever existed.
"You can't just give yourself that many hit points right off the bat," explained Steph, seeing that Pit was about to be a huge challenge to deal with. "You gotta start off small!"
"I see...in that case, can we give ourselves infinite hit points?" Pit was undeterred in his quest, as Steph frowned and Viridi pinched the crown of her nose.
"...how about we just roll the dice?" asked Geno as he grabbed some dice on the table. Big ups to the star for playing Dungeons and Dragons the right way. "This is how we determine hit points."
"One more question - can our character identify as a Samoan warlord?" A Samoan warlord...now that's something you don't hear every day. "I don't feel like the Samoan people get nearly enough representation in tabletop games."
"Please tell me you gave Pit a refresher course..." Sephiroth said to Steph and her friends, wondering how much he could take of Pit's asinine questions.
"I did give him one, but I doubt that he listened," responded Steph, giving an uncaring shrug as Geno rolled the dice. "That's his loss, not mine..."
Poor Zelda was in a lot of emotional distress after learning that Ganondorf would officiate her wedding. The princess sat in the library, lamenting, as Impa, Midna, and Researcher Zelda did their best to comfort her.
"Could've been worse...you could've had Zant!" Midna said to Zelda, trying to bring some levity to the situation. But she didn't make Zelda feel any better.
"I honestly would've preferred Waluigi over him or Ganon," responded Zelda, who was willing to accept Waluigi's shortcomings and room for error. "At least he's liked by many."
"I'm sure that there's someone out there who ikes Ganondorf..." Irked by Midna's assumption, Zelda gave the imp a questionable stare. "...if we're not just talking about Rosalina, that is."
"Still don't see it." Zelda went back to moping away, resting her chin in the palm of her hands. "Well, at least we have an officiant in place...what about the wedding rings, did we secure those?"
"Tails lost the rings," Impa informed Zelda, as Tails was relied upon to retrieve the wedding rings and hold unto them until the wedding. The hits just kept on coming for Zelda. "Essentially, they're gone forever."
"He couldn't have been any worse than Sonic!" exclaimed Midna, again trying to bring some levity, only for Zelda to let out a depressed sigh. "In all honesty, Sonic would've been my first choice..."
Researcher Zelda: Ganondorf is still the officiant, and now the wedding rings have been misplaced. Things are already heading south, and we're only two weeks away from the wedding! Just hoping that Zelda can keep it all together until then...
"Pardon me, ladies," Dr. Bad-Boon approached Zelda and company, on the hunt for his precious MeeMee. "Just wanted to ask a question, if you don't mind..."
"Get lost, banana breath..." Midna told off Dr. Bad-Boon, who was very adamant as he refused to leave his spot. "...go bother someone else!"
"I don't mean to be a bother, I'm just looking for my future wife...erm, a monkey! Have you seen one anywhere?"
"We did see one here in the library not so long ago," answered Researcher Zelda, as Dr. Bad-Boon's lit up with the utmost joy. "Donkey Kong had a lot of trouble operating that desktop computer."
"He's not exactly the monkey I'm looking for. Let me clarify - have you seen a female monkey? This short? Wears a skirt and has a flower on her head?"
"I don't recall." Researcher Zelda looked at Zelda, Impa, and Midna, and saw that none of them knew of a monkey that matched Dr. Bad-Boon's description. "But we do hope you find her soon."
"I hope so, too...thank you for your time." Dr. Bad-Boon would continue his search, as he left the library. He was determined to get his hands on MeeMee, one way or another.
As Dr. Bad-Boon exited the library, he suddenly ran into Kazuya and Heihachi. They were speaking with Sans, as they had their eyes set on AiAi and MeeMee's child, Baby.
"you're talking about the baby monkey?" Sans asked the Mishimas, who both nodded their heads as Dr. Bad-Boon eavesdropped. "he went to the yiga clan hideout along with his mom."
"We ought to give this mother of his a piece of our mind," Kazuya suggested to Heihachi, as Dr. Bad-Boon was delighted by the prospect of seeing MeeMee. "Just for giving birth to an insolent child..."
"I take it that you're looking for monkeys as well?" Dr. Bad-Boon approached the Mishimas, one step closer to fulfilling his (arguably questionable) evil plan. "Mind having a third wheel on board?"
"Are you too interested in dealing with monkeys?" With his history of putting up with AiAi and company, Dr. Bad-Boon readily nodded his head. "Hmph, good enough. Let's go."
"a part of me feels like I should intervene..." Sans said to himself, watching as Dr. Bad-Boon and the Mishimas went down the hallway, before walking away and shrugging his shoulders. "...eh, someone else's got it."
AiAi was about to do it...he was about to take a ride in Master Kohga's super-duper ultra-difficult never-before-cleared obstacle course. It was essentially a giant slide, with sliding axes and whatnot. Should the monkey clear the course, then Master Kohga would happily give him as many bananas from his secret stash as he craved.
"You got this, AiAi!" Sonic cheered on for the monkey, who was perched at the top of the obstacle course inside a ball. The rest of the ice cream gang cheered on for AiAi while Master Kohga stood by, chuckling.
"Foolish of you to think that the monkey will clear my course," Master Kohga said to the ice cream gang, confident that AiAi wouldn't make it to the end. "No one has ever cleared it before! Ever!"
"Uh, I think we know that...it's in the name. Now can we get this over with?" Only Master Kohga could start the obstacle course, as he stood next to the level that opened the trapdoor AiAi was perched on.
"That excited to see the monkey lose? Very well then. Have at thee!" So Master Kohga pulled on the level, releasing the trapdoor as AiAi fell down unto the obstacle course.
"Yippee!" squealed AiAi as he rolled down the obstacle course, being mindful of the swinging axes ad fire dousing in his path. The ice cream gang watched AiAi's every move, while Master Kohga snickered to himself.
"Hee hee...I made that obstacle course as inhumanely difficult as possible so that no mortal that clear it. Not even one of my men. Or even myself, for that matter. If anyone were to pass it, for any inexplicable reason, then I will be very..."
"All done!" announced AiAi, having reached the end of the obstacle course as he hopped out of his ball in celebration. Master Kohga looked stunned, as the ice cream cheered on for AiAi.
Master Kohga: Impossible! My obstacle course is called the super-duper ultra-difficult never-before-cleared obstacle course for a reason! And that monkey made a lie out of that name. How could he?!
"Three cheers for AiAi!" the male Inkling cheered on for the monkey, as a devastated Master Kohga fell to his knees - only to stand back up a couple of seconds later as he was full of anger.
"No! I refuse to acknowledge this result!" shouted Master Kohga, now believing that AiAi might've cheated somehow. "I demand video footage of the monkey going down the obstacle course. Instant replay!"
"Instant replay? This isn't American football," Dante said to Mater Kohga, who was throwing quite a fit as he stomped his foot in rage. "Just be the bigger man, and give AiAi some of your bananas."
"A bigger man I am NOT! I will make this obstacle course even harder, and if the monkey passes a second time...then I will concede."
"Can't you just give him one banana?" Nana asked Master Kohga, only for Kohga to march away to retrieve a few materials for his obstacle course. "Why does he always have to be so stingy...?"
"Wouldn't hurt to have AiAi clear it a second time," Popo offered his two cents, as Nana looked at the Ice Climber like he was crazy. Almost seemed like Popo was trying to buy some time...
Thanks to Kazuma, Link was forced to watch Falco's presentation on why the avian pilot deserved to be the wedding officiant. The Hylian felt bored during the presentation, yawning multiple times.
"Yawn again, and you won't live to see your wedding," Kazuma threatened Link, as he held his gun against the Hylian's head. Gulping nervously, Link looked lively, or at least he pretended to.
"Did he really have to bring a gun with him?" Link whispered to Fox, who was sitting next to the Hylian on the couch. Kazuma kept a close eye on Link, just in case the Hylian's eyes were to drift asleep.
"Yakuza protocol, brother," Fox whispered back, not holding himself viable should Link receive a gunshot to the head. "Now pay attention!"
"Another reason why I would be a great wedding officiant is that I'm very attractive to the ladies," explained Falco, pressing the button on his remote as he went to the next slide of his PowerPoint presentation. "A male officiant should look decent enough to command attention."
"Such a waste of my time..." grumbled Link, as Kazuma nudged his gun towards the Hylian's head. "...I mean, I'm having the time of my life!"
The game of Dungeons and Dragons was coming along well at Cafe Leblanc, as the three teams were going on a quest together with their characters. Pit, however, required a lot of hand-holding...
"When do we bust out the game board and the game pieces?" the angel asked during the game, as Steph smacked her forehead. "We already have the dice."
"This is a roleplaying game, Pit," the Luminary had to inform the angel since Steph couldn't bring herself to do it. "It takes place in our imagination."
"I tell the story, and you make the choices in the story," added Steph, now wishing that Pit had listened during her refresher course. "Just sit back and let your teammates handle things, will ya?"
"I don't think you're a good storyteller," Pit admitted to Steph, who felt slightly insulted; she'd feel even more that way if those words came from a far more experienced Dungeons and Dragons player. "But your narration is on point, though!"
"...moving right along." Ignoring Pit's comments, Steph carried on with the game. "You hear a low rumble on the other side of the trees, followed by a shrill screech and the beating of heavy wings..."
Tails brought MeeMee, Gongon, and Baby to the Yiga Clan hideout, in the hopes of finding AiAi...but first, they had to wait. Since Tails wanted to speak with Master Kohga, he and the monkeys were forced to wait at the Yiga Clan's...erm, waiting room.
"I'll have you know that this place is still a work in progress," a Yiga clansman informed Tails and company, who were sitting in lawn chairs. A few rows of lawn chairs were assembled. "As long as you don't ask where we got the lawn chairs from, we should be good. Master Kohga will be with you shortly."
"This kinda looks like Palutena's old lawn chair," Tails observed the lawn chair he was sitting on, as the Yiga clansman gasped out of terror and vanished away via smoke bomb. "I'm so sorry!"
Palutena: My lawn chair is...at the Yiga Clan hideout? Weird, but thanks for letting me know. Now, have you seen the water dispenser? We were supposed to get one in the mail this week.
"Is that the new water dispenser?" asked Tails, as he saw a water dispenser in the distance. No waiting room would be complete without one. "The Yiga Clan sure loves to steal from us..."
"Look, Tails, a banana!" MeeMee said to the yellow fox as she pointed at a random banana lying on the ground, at the back of the waiting room. "Can I get it, pretty please?"
"Looks suspicious lying there...but I can't say no to you. I'll watch over Baby; you go enjoy yourself." So MeeMee hopped off her seat and went over to the banana, as Tails continued to wait. However long that would be.
"Tails!" a certain swordsman called out to the yellow fox, as Cloud ran inside the waiting room. He came to a stop when he saw something that easily caught his attention. "Wait...is that our new water dispenser, in the corner?"
"You know how it got here." Right off the bat, Cloud knew the answer. "The Yiga Clan just can't control themselves..."
"Yeah, so much for them getting their own stuff. Hey, have you seen Kazuya and Heihachi anywhere?"
"Can't say I have - these monkeys have been keeping me busy. Am I supposed to be on the lookout, or...?"
"Apparently, those two have a score to settle with that infant monkey you're holding. It's a pretty stupid reason."
"Huh, that's weird, this banana won't open," said MeeMee, who was trying to unpeel the banana but to no avail. Cloud and Tails looked over, inferring that MeeMee might have fallen into a trap. "The skin is so tough!"
"MeeMee, no!" shouted Tails, placing Baby on the lawn chair as he, Cloud, and Gongon ran over to MeeMee. But once they got close to the female monkey...
...a large net was suddenly pulled up from underneath them, catching them and hoisting them in the air. Appearing out in the open were Kazuya, Heihachi, and Dr. Bad-Boon. Heihachi was holding the rope attached to the net.
"Our plan worked like a charm, my son!" Heihachi said gleefully to Kazuya, who was smirking evilly as he was proud of his catch. "One of them fell for the fake banana, just like you said they would!"
"And we got an even bigger catch than expected..." stated Kazuya as he looked up and saw Cloud and Tails trapped in the net along with the monkeys. Cloud tried to fight out but to no avail.
"Oh, MeeMee...I have come to take you as my one true love!" Dr. Bad-Boon said to the female monkey, who blew a raspberry at the baboon. "Face it - I'm your real husband!"
"This isn't cool, you guys," Cloud said to Kazuya and company, as Kazuya grabbed Baby and held him in the palm of his mighty hand. MeeMee fretted for Baby, as Kazuya was staring delicately at the infant.
"You tried to harm my father earlier...and now you will be met with consequences for your actions. Your demise will be swift..."
"His demise will be swift?" Heihachi frowned at Kazuya, while still holding onto the rope with just one hand. "You're actually going to kill the monkey? I thought we were just giving him a piece of his mind!"
"It has been my intention from the start to kill him. No one, child or adult, messes with my father and gets away with it."
"Personally, I wouldn't mind Baby being killed," admitted Dr. Bad-Boon, as MeeMee gasped at the doctor. No regard for infant lives. "His existence would get in the way of my own child with MeeMee."
"We can't do this, it just isn't right!" Heihachi stressed to Kazuya, being a voice of reason for once in his life. "He is just a child..."
"Showing a change of heart, aren't we?" questioned Kazuya, as the Mishima partnership was beginning to slowly fall apart. "Should've expected better from my old man..."
A man of his word, Master Kohga made his obstacle course even harder for AiAi. He added more obstacles to the course and even included a "boss" at the end for good measure.
"Master Kohga, why am I the 'boss' of this-a obstacle course?" Mario asked the Yiga Clan leader, forced to stand in front of the course's end. The plumber was also forced to wear his spiky green shell.
"Because I didn't feel like contacting Bowser," admitted Master Kohga, holding a pair of binoculars so he could see AiAi attempt to clear the obstacle course with his own eyes. "Also, you were more easily available."
Female Inkling: Master Kohga didn't do much to change up the obstacle course - all he did was add a few more axes, and a Mario. Would love to see the instant replay on the second go-around. *snorts*
"Ready to roll, monkey?" Master Kohga asked AiAi, who was perched at the top of the obstacle course. "Then let's roll!" Kohga pulled on the lever, dropping AiAi down to the obstacle course as AiAi rolled his way down.
"He's on the move," observed Dante, as he and the others watched AiAi rolling down the course in his ball. Master Kohga was watching too, with his binoculars, and couldn't believe what he was seeing.
"No! This is inconceivable!" the clan leader shouted, amazed at how well AiAi was faring. Time for him to call that super-duper ultra-difficult never-before-cleared obstacle course something else. "How is he doing so well? He's not human!"
"Well, I hope not...he's a monkey," Sonic pointed ut, as Master Kohga growled at the blue hedgehog. Soon AiAi reached the boss of the obstacle course, as he encountered Mario.
"Please go easy on-a me..." Mario pleaded AiAi, as he hid inside his spiky shell. AiAi rolled into Mario, sending him flying out of the obstacle clear before crossing the finish line.
"And he wins again!" cheered Banjo, as Master Kohga grunted and threw his binoculars on the ground before stomping them. AiAi had passed the obstacle course not once...but twice.
"Someone get me a new pair of binoculars!" demanded Master Kohga, as a Yiga clansman ran to the clan leader with a new pair of binoculars. Kohga snatched the binoculars away, before throwing them on the ground and stomping on them.
"Those binoculars aren't cheap, you know," the Yiga clansman informed Master Kohga, only to be blind-sighted by a spiky shell as he jumped out of the way.
"Woah, we got a green shell on the loose!"
"Somebody help-a me!" Mario cried out from inside the spiky shell, which bounced around the lair as everyone tried to get out of harm's way. Mario was spinning out of control, with no signs of stopping.
"Quick, execute Order Eight-Five-Zero!" Master Kohga said to the Yiga clansman, doing some funky ninja hand signs before dashing away. Almost like he was doing some kind of Naruto run.
"Executing Order Eight-Five..." the Yiga clansman started as he too did funky ninja hand signs...only to stop and groan as he ran off. "...Master Kohga, we don't even have an Order Eight-Five-Zero! Hate it when he makes up these orders on the fly..."
Back at the Yiga Clan waiting room, Kazuya and Heihachi were quarreling with one another, with Dr. Bad-Boon caught in the crossfire. Those up in the net hoped that they would be freed, but Heihachi was still holding on to that rope.
"I never raised you like this," Heihachi said to Kazuya, who thought that his dad was being overdramatic. "I never taught you to kill innocent babies!"
"Says the man who once threw me into a volcano," responded Kazuya, unable to forget the high heat of the volcano's core. "Who do you think I got that maneuver from?"
Suddenly, the spiky green shell came inside the waiting room, crashing into the lawn chairs and overall just causing a mess all around. The shell spun towards Heihachi, knocking him off his feet.
"What the..." uttered Heihachi as he fell to the ground, dropping the rope and releasing Cloud and company from the net in the process. The shell then headed in Kazuya's direction, crashing into the businessman.
"Ack!" Kazuya grunted as the shell caused him to fall backward, making him drop Baby in the process. MeeMee tried to run over and catch Baby, but Dr. Bad-Boon beat her to the punch as Baby fell in his hands.
"You're too late!" Dr. Bad-Boon taunted MeeMee, who looked on peril as Bad-Boon held Baby away from his mom. "Since Mr. Kazuya couldn't kill this wretched baby...I will have to do the honors!"
"Can't you just, I dunno...kill the baby's father instead?" asked Cloud, as Dr. Bad-Boon found himself in deep and introspective thought. "Why not wipe the baby out of existence, instead of killing him?"
"Huh, I never thought about it like that. I will admit, killing AiAi would be just as effective and give me some credibility..."
Speaking of AiAi, the monkey rolled into the scene in his ball, rolling into Dr. Bad-Boon and knocking him over. Dr. Bad-Boon dropped Baby, as MeeMee grabbed Baby in the nick of time.
"I got you!" MeeMee said to Baby after she caught her son, before cradling him in her arms. AiAi got out of his ball, checking to see if MeeMee and Baby were both okay.
"You two alright?" AiAi asked MeeMee, as Gongon came over for a momentary monkey embrace. MeeMee nodded her head, with a smile. "I came in at the right time, didn't I?"
"Yup!" smiled MeeMee, as the spiky green shell came to a stop when it crashed into the water dispenser. The water dispenser fell on top of the shell, as a dizzy Mario crawled out.
"My head..." moaned Mario, seeing stars as he held his head. Perhaps the dizziest the plumber has ever felt in a long time.
Mario: My shell saved-a Kazuya from potentially killing a baby? I feel like-a you're making this story up, but I'll take it. Told Peach that the shell-a can save lives!
"No, no, no!" Dr. Bad-Boon shouted, stomping on the ground with both of his feet as he unleashed his fury on the monkeys. "This was not how it was supposed to end! MeeMee is supposed to be with ME!"
"She's supposed to be with who?" someone asked Dr. Bad-Boon, who turned around and saw Dante along with the rest of the ice cream gang. The gang had caught up to AiAi, and Dr. Bad-Boon found himself in quite a pickle.
"Um, let me explain..." the baboon said to the ice cream as he backed away - only to back up into the monkeys. Dr. Bad-Boon froze up and slowly turned his head around, as the monkeys were glaring at him.
"Going somewhere, Dr. Bad-Boon?" AiAi asked the baboon, who backed away from the monkeys - only to back up into Dante. Dante stared Bad-Boon down.
"Look, we're not looking for any trouble," Dante said to Dr. Bad-Boon, who fiddled around in his pocket for a weapon that he could use. "So how about you just vamoose already, and call it a day?"
"Aha!" Finding the weapon he was looking for, Dr. Bad-Boon pulled out...a banana, and pointed it at Dante. Needless to say, Dante didn't feel threatened in the slightest.
"That banana is gonna faze me? As if..." Dante took the banana from Dr. Bad-Boon and tossed it in the air. Dr. Bad-Boon and the monkeys watched as the banana went up in the air...
"So much for Order Eight-Five-Zero..." grumbled Master Kohga as he and a Yiga clansman entered the waiting room...only to see the banana fall on the ground in a huge splat. Both Kohga and the clansman gasped in shock.
"Oh, boy..." fretted Sonic, as Master Kohga got on the ground and crawled over to the banana remains. Kohga picked up the remains, his hands trembling after witnessing such a brutal moment.
"WHO DID THIS?!" the clan leader shouted as he stood up, looking for the culprit. Dante slowly backed away to avoid any blame, and as for Dr. Bad-Boon...
"He did it!" AiAi and MeeMee shouted in unison, as they pointed accusingly at Dr. Bad-Boon. Master Kohga directed his fury to Dr. Bad-Boon, sending a few shivers down his spine.
"I had nothing to do with this!" Dr. Bad-Boon tried to plead his innocence, as Master Kohga folded his arms. "I was trying to use the banana as a weapon..."
"Bananas are not weapons...they are sacred, and meant to be cherished!" Master Kohga made a whistle, as two Yiga footsoldiers were summoned at the spot. "Guards! Take this baboon away!"
"You got it all wrong! I'm innocent! Innocent, I tell you!" Dr. Bad-Boon was left kicking on the ground, as the footsoldiers dragged him away. AiAi and the monkeys waved goodbye to their baboon nemesis.
"Who knew that bananas were so sacred around these parts," Cloud said to Tails, before looking over and seeing that Heihachi had left sometime during the whole ordeal. Kazuya was gone as well. "At least the baby monkey's still safe..."
Heihachi: Wanting to kill an infant monkey...well I never! I never knew that Kazuya would stoop so low. Granted, he was low enough already, but he has reached an even newer low.
Kazuya: My father and I have had our little spat, but there is still use for that old man yet. Even after all that quarreling, he still has yet to catch on...
"So, Master Kohga...how about that secret stash?" Sonic asked Master Kohga, who looked down at AiAi and the monkeys. "Can AiAi's pals get in on it, too?" The thought of that caused Kohga to whimper.
"Alright monkey...you win," Master Kohga conceded to AiAi, who jumped for joy. His back hunched over, Kohga grumpily walked away. "Allow me to get the bananas prepared for you..."
Things were getting exciting during Dungeons and Dragons, as Geno and his team were about to take the sword of Excalibur (which was named by Steph herself). Sephiroth was rolling the dice, and he rolled...an eighteen.
"An eighteen...how pleasant," smiled Sephiroth, as Geno and the Luminary were both satisfied; an eighteen was just the number they needed.
"Sword smashes the amulet, freeing Draconis from its spell," narrated Steph, as Geno's team was on their way to victory. "Red dragon turns his head, grabs Arsene in his jaws, swallows him alive..."
"We object!" proclaimed Pit, unleashing his inner Phoenix Wright as he pointed with his finger with much authority. "Arsene will not be met by such fate."
"Can we not?" Joker asked Pit through clenched teeth, worried about the angel causing a scene - especially in the presence of visitors.
"Um, we're literally about to end the game," Steph stated to Pit, as she was about to give the victory to Geno's team. "Just accept your fate."
"Ending the game with Arsene dead? As if!" snorted Pit, before savagely knocking the figurines and dice and character sheets off the table. Steph was so ticked off. "How's that for your ending?"
"This is exactly how every game with Pit turns out," Joker remarked with a sigh, and Steph learned that truth the hard way as she threw her arms up in defeat. The young woman sat back in her chair, as Alex gave her a comforting pat on her shoulder.
"So...do we still win?" Geno asked Steph, who was too done with Pit at the moment to answer the question, let alone say a single word. "Just say that we won, for Sephiroth's sake...he's quite the sore loser."
"...and that, Link, is the end of my presentation," Falco concluded his PowerPoint presentation, as Link had bags under his eyes. Kazuma kept the Hylian awake the entire time. "Any questions?"
"Why did you have to make me suffer through that?" questioned Link, as Kazuma put his gun away; Link found that as a relief. "I learned nothing."
"Oh, but you did learn something - you learned that I'm the best choice for officiating your wedding." Falco would approach Link, ready to make an offer than the Hylian wouldn't refuse. "Kazuya, the briefcase..."
"What briefcase?" Link looked confused, as Kazuma got underneath the couch that Link was sitting on. "Falco, if this is some elaborate prank, I'm gonna..."
Link immediately stopped speaking, as Kazuma pulled out a briefcase from underneath the couch. The yakuza opened up the briefcase, revealing to Link stacks of cash inside.
"Dollar bills, baby - lots of 'em, too," Fox enticed Link, who couldn't believe what he was seeing. Fox and Falco were pulling out all the stops, weren't they?
"All of it can be yours if you name Falco as your wedding officiant," stated Kazuma, believing that the allure of the green would sway Link's mind.
"You're seriously bribing me with money? Really?" Link shook his head at Fox and Falco, almost believing that he was being pranked. "I'm not that gullible."
"C'mon, it's money!" Falco said to Link, whose indecisiveness was irritating the avian pilot. "Who in their right mind would turn down money like this? Just take it already!"
"Wait a minute...can I take the money without accepting your offer to make you my wedding officiant?" Link was now looking for some leeway.
"I mean, technically you can...I would prefer for you not to do that since that would make the whole point of getting this money worthless..."
"That's it, I'm sold!" Link snatched the briefcase away from Falco, before running out of the movie room. Kazuma stood there, perplexed, while Fox and Falco were both speechless.
"Is he...is he going to return the money?" asked Kazuma, who had gone through all the trouble to get the briefcase of money for Fox and Falco. "I hope he comes back soon..."
"Good job on the presentation, man," Fox awkwardly said to Falco as he gave his best friend a congratulatory pat on the back. Falco looked down at the floor, his chance squandered.
Falco: *nods his head in defeat* Yup...totally wasted my chance.
Briefcase in hand, Link ran to his room to put the briefcase of money away. On his way there, however, he ran into Zelda, who was less than amused to see her fiance.
"Oh, hi, Link..." Zelda greeted the Hylian, sounding like she was in a bad mood. That was how most of her greetings to Link had gone since last week.
"Hi, Zelda," Link returned the favor, as he held the briefcase behind his back. "You're still...angry with me about Ganondorf, are you?"
"Still catching on, I see..." Zelda let out a depressed sigh, letting Link know how she felt about his controversial decision. "...and I take it that you're here to cheer me up?"
"I was gonna show this later, but...better now than never." Link revealed the briefcase to Zelda, opening it up and revealing the money inside. As expected, Zelda's eyes grew big.
"My goodness...that's a lot of money!" For but a brief moment, Zelda's melancholy had gone away. "Where did you get this briefcase?"
"Got it from a friend of Fox and Falco's. Some yakuza from Japan. He thought that you should have it." Link handed the briefcase over to Zelda, who accepted it while still looking surprised.
"That was awfully nice of him. Apparently, Tails lost our wedding rings...we could use this money to replace them."
"My thoughts exactly," Link nodded his head, as Zelda smiled before leaning in towards Link and kissing him on the cheek. Link really needed that.
"Tell this friend of Fox and Falco's that I said thank you!" Zelda went down the hallway, wanting to show the briefcase to Impa and Researcher Zelda. Link stood there, proud of what he had done.
"Hehe...I still got it." After making his remark, Link turned around and went down the hallway. "Wonder if Cloud kept the Mishimas away from those lousy monkeys..."
AiAi, MeeMee, Gongon, and Baby were all in good hands, as they were at the Yiga Clan hideout eating some bananas. Bananas from Master Kohga's secret stash, that is. The monkeys were free to help themselves, as Master Kohga was forced to watch.
"No, not that banana, that one's my favorite!" Master Kohga shouted at Gongon, who was simply eating a banana. The clan leader was tied down to a chair, with Sonic and Cloud holding on to him for good measure.
"Can you believe this nut?" Sonic asked Cloud with a giggle, as Master Kohga was screaming perilously at the top of his lungs. "Treating the bananas like they're his family!"
"Must've been pretty lonely growing up," replied Cloud, wondering how much of Master Kohga's screaming he could take. Meanwhile, hanging above in a cage was Dr. Bad-Boon, who was taken in for "killing" a banana.
"Those bananas should be for me! All mine!" the baboon frowned as he shook his at the monkeys, only for an egg to be spat in his face. Courtesy of Kazooie.
"Put a sock in it, ya filthy ape!" Kazooie shouted at Dr. Bad-Boon before turning her attention to Popo, who was chilling with Banjo. "So how about that meeting, Popo?"
"The meeting?" Popo perked up, before looking at the imaginary watch on his wrist as Kazooie furrowed her brow. "Would you look at the time...it's too late. We'll just pick up where we left off another day."
"Another day, huh...I'll hold you to it." Kazooie left Popo alone, giving the Ice Climber the side-eye as she poked her head back inside Banjo's backpack.
Kazooie: Popo's hiding something, I can feel it. The way he acted during the meeting after I put him on the spot was very telling. Something about Popo awfully stinks...
