Author's Note:
So does anyone know if Multiversus is on the Switch? Thought that it would've been, but there's always plenty of potential for a port later down the road. Just saw that Velma from Scooby-Doo is joining the roster, and that is...interesting, to say the least. Uh, what was I supposed to be doing again? Oh yeah, guest reviews...
"Have you ever heard of a Backrooms or a Poolrooms? It's a creepypasta that involves room with endless maze with yellow wallpapers with buzzing lights. Poolrooms is one of the levels in Backrooms."
Never heard of it before, but I just hit up Google Images to see what it was all about. That endoskeleton guy in one of the photos looks kinda funny. Moving on:
"I would like to see Captain Falcon no-clipping into the Backrooms then ends up in a Poolrooms where he had to swim in a deep water to escape back to reality as a main plot. Sonic and Lavenza must team-up to help Captain Falcon escape the Poolrooms of Backrooms as part of Phase 2: Become a Better Man."
Why you gotta do Captain Falcon like that? Maybe one of these days, I can make this idea happen in a future chapter. The other review is from David:
"Do Eliza and Mel have a house near the Smash Mansion? (So Ken can see his wife and son on every occasion). A reference or nod to Christian Maracle? (He does WWE Sin videos, basically parodying CinemaSins). A small scene of characters reacting to 3DS games price hike? (Dragon Quest VIII on 3DS has gone up to $149.00). Will the Xenoblade 1 and 2 characters meet the Xenoblade 3 characters when the Xenoblade 3 chapter is released? Is the love triangle between Rex, Pyra, and Nia gonna be resolved soon? And finally, what are your thoughts on the upcoming WWE mass firings again?"
I'm afraid not. Don't know if I'll do a reference/nod to him. Might do a scene with the 3DS games (DQ VIII is worth how much?!). The Xenoblade characters from the first two games will indeed meet with the two ones. The love triangle won't be resolved anytime soon. And I have no thoughts or opinions on the upcoming WWE mass firings. Thought that the firings were only for WWE NXT 2.0. I will reserve my judgment until anything major happens in the near future.
Episode 334: FunRun
Little Mac was still in the hospital, his leg healing after Mario's senseless attack. Fortunately for the boxer, he only had a few bruises – no broken bones. Even better news was that he was to be discharged real soon.
But even with Little Mac hospitalized, there was stuff that had to be done. Meetings that Master Hand had to do, for whatever reason. In fact, Master Hand was having a meeting right now at the lecture hall, as the residents were asked to attend.
As many folks suspected, the meeting had much to do with Little Mac. And standing on the stage with Master Hand, Link, Zelda, and Isabelle was the man who was responsible for Little Mac's injury – the man none other than Mario.
"Good morning, ladies and gentlemen," Master Hand greeted everyone in the lecture hall, hoping he wouldn't hold them up too long for breakfast. "As you all are aware, Little Mac was injured at the sports plex two weeks ago. Isabelle, care to provide the details?"
"It happened in the locker room-a where the basketball court was," explained Mario, who apparently had never fully explained his attack to anyone - not even his own brother, let alone his own wife. "The paramedics took-a him to the hospital, and the doctors tried to save-a his life. They did the best-a that they could…and he is going to be okay."
"What is wrong with you?" Donkey Kong questioned Mario, who found nothing wrong with the explanation that he gave. "Why did you have to phrase it like that?"
"So he's really going to be fine?" Robin asked Mario, hoping that Little Mac didn't have any other injured body parts during Mario's attack. "Anything else he's suffering from?"
"Yes - he has a slight pelvic fracture," stated Link as he looked towards Mario, who looked away with his arms behind his back and whistled innocently. "But people have survived far worse…"
Link: Mario isn't exactly above injuring people - whether it be on purpose or by accident. One day Mario came in complaining about a speed bump on the highway. I wonder who he ran over then.
"Only Little Mac was seriously hurt during our little sports day," announced Zelda, choosing to ignore the unfortunate soul who got hurt by Hunter. "The only one, I am pretty sure…"
"Yeah, it's-a only Little Mac, thank God," said Mario, as Zelda suspiciously eyed around the lecture hall following her brief announcement. "But you should've seen the way they looked-a at me. Like I was a murderer or some-a thing."
"Hey...why did you do it?" Pit asked Mario as he raised his hand, desiring to know what propelled the plumber to savagely injure Little Mac's knee and remove him from the basketball competition. Corrin wanted to know as well.
"It was an accident. An accident-a that was mostly fueled-a by jealousy and many other things that escape-a me now."
"Was he talking back? Did you get sick of his face? Did he owe you money?"
"That is enough, Pit," Master Hand said to the angel, who immediately piped down hoping to ask Mario these pressing questions at a later time. "Anna will be starting a small fund to pay for Little Mac's hospital bill...no, Pit, you can't contribute with rain checks. Put your hand back down."
Link and Zelda had plans to visit Little Mac at the hospital, but the couple didn't plan to go just by themselves. So during breakfast, they went to go see which residents were interested in coming with them.
"Hey guys, Link and I are gonna visit Little Mac after breakfast this morning," Zelda said to the mansion residents gathered in the dining room, who were all eating away and enjoying their breakfast. "And we're kicking in $5 for flowers."
"Who's going, just you and Link?" asked Wario, who was the only person not enjoying his breakfast as he was forcing himself to eat a quinoa breakfast bowl. It was all a part of his healthy initiative.
"No, uh, me, Link, the Ice Climbers, and Lady Palutena so far." Zelda saw Rosalina pass by, holding a brown cat in her hands. "Rosalina, are you coming?
"I can't, Kana's pet cat is sick," replied Rosalina, holding up the cat in question as Zelda wondered why she had never seen the brown coat before. "Kana entrusted me to take care of and babysit her."
Rosalina: She's been sick for some time. Thank you for asking, no one asks…about Sparkles. *sniffs Sparkles* She absolutely smells…
Corrin: Every great father adopts a pet for their child, as I have learned from watching Luigi. *pauses* From far away, that is – I'm a long-distance observer. Kana wanted a cat, so I had no choice but to give in to her demands. And I managed to find one on the street for free!
"I have to give her her meds, I have to pet her, and who will she eat lunch with?" Rosalina asked as she was taking her babysitting and nursing duties seriously. Given that she was the mother of Lumas, that wasn't a surprise.
"Can't your Luma keep her company?" asked Zelda, having enough confidence that Rosalina's Luma companion could watch over Sparkles without much trouble.
"There's bad blood, jealousies, cliques. Luma doesn't like it when I have any companion other than him."
"Rosalina, you're the chairman of the party planning committee. I shouldn't even be planning this, it's your job."
"Alright, I guess I'll go…" Rosalina heaved a sigh, having no choice but to enroll herself in the hospital trip – and find someone trustworthy enough to babysit Sparkles and nurse her back to strength.
Mario sat in his living room that morning, expecting a guest from the mansion to pay him a visit. That visitor, being Cloud, stopped by Mario's house that morning as Peach let him in through the front door.
"My lord my liege," Mario greeted Cloud, who got a free escort to the living room courtesy of Peach. Cloud didn't believe that he warranted an escort, but he appreciated the friendly hospitality regardless.
"Yes, Mario?" Cloud asked Mario as he sat on the living room couch across from the plumber, worried about what was in store for him.
Mario: So Cloud was a former man-a of the mansion, where he was a little fish-a in a big pond. I was in the same-a position myself. But at my own-a home, I am still top dog, in a pretty small-a pond. So, who is the real boss? The dog or a fish?
"So I need a little treat-a for the guys and gals," Mario said to Cloud, leaning in close to the swordsman (perhaps too close for comfort) with his hands pressed together. "Something to win-a their affections back."
"Back? Why is that Mario?" inquired Cloud, who wished that he had the strength to tell Mario to acknowledge his personal space.
"Well, as you already know, I struck-a Little Mac with a nightstick."
"Yes, and you did this on purpose, is that correct."
"No…I was negligent. But he's-a in the hospital, he's fine, recovering nicely. Tiny little crack-a in his leg. But he will be up-a in…"
"Did this technically happen on mansion property?"
"Yes, it was on mansion property, with mansion-a property, so…double jeopardy, we are fine. We are-a fine."
"I don't think you understand how jeopardy works."
"Oh, right, I'm-a sorry. What is: we are fine?"
Cloud: People like to call me a "Wunderkind"; I don't even know what that means. I mean, I know what it means, it means very successful for your age, so I guess it makes sense, somewhat, but…it's a weird word.
With Rosalina going to the hospital soon, she needed someone she could trust to watch over Sparkles until she got back. So the mother of Lumas waited outside the dining room watching the residents exit when the perfect person entered her sight.
"Hey, Ganon," Rosalina greeted Ganondorf, who was quickly scarfing down an entire cup of Folgers coffee. The best part of waking up is Folgers in your cup…supposedly.
"Hey Rosa, what's up?" asked Ganondorf as he threw his plastic cup into a nearby trash can, without even having to look. The stuff of legends.
"Can you do me a little favor? Babysit Sparkles for me and feed her and give her medicine. I have to visit the alchy."
"So what do you need me to do?" Ganondorf didn't seem sold on babysitting Sparkles as he took a gander at the brown cat Rosalina was holding, but Rosalina gave him a note anyways.
"I wrote it out. There's a diabetes shot, roll the insulin in your hand, don't shake it. She gets an ace inhibitor with her meal, but you have to put her right in front of the dish or she won't see it because of the cataracts. Mix one capsule of omega fatty acid in with her kidney medicine, um… and you want to give that to her 15 minutes after she's eaten. And, oh and there's a fungal cream because she has this infection under her tail, so you're gonna have to lift her tail and put the cream right at the base of her tail. If you need anything, just ask Corrin."
"Why do I have to ask him?" Ganondorf would see his question go unanswered, as Rosalina handed him Sparkles and dipped from the kitchen. Ganondorf sighed as he turned around…and was spooked upon seeing Steve.
"I see that you are on babysitting duty," Steve said to Ganondorf; he most likely heard every single word that came out of Rosalina's mouth. "Would you like a second nanny at your side?"
"That would be nice, thank you…" Whatever made his job easier, Ganondorf supposed – even if Steve wasn't his first option for a "second nanny".
Mario had a big announcement to make, as he went to the gaming room to get something off his chest. There was a decent-sized crowd present, which was the perfect condition for Mario.
"Okay, I have an announcement," announced Mario, as he captured the attention of everyone in the gaming room. Almost everyone had a hunch for whatever the announcement would be.
"You pushed Donkey Kong out the window?" guessed Sora; Mario pushing Donkey Kong out of any window would certainly revitalize an iconic video game rivalry.
"You shot Dark Pit?" guessed Min Min; Dark Pit, who was just chilling in the gaming room minding his own business, gave Min Min a very furious glare.
"No, and no!" replied Mario, greatly bothered by the assumptions that Sora and Min Min made. Another assumption would've broken him. "That is not-a funny, I love-a you guys, even though I hit one-a of you with Justine's nightstick. For which I take-a full responsibility. Look, I'm just trying to take everybody's mind-a off of that unavoidable tragedy, and onto more positive things. So I thought we should-a plant a tree. Like a freedom tree."
"Okay, we're leaving for the hospital at 1," announced Zelda, with an announcement of her own to make as she and Link were standing at the gaming room entrance.
"I can take three people," volunteered Sonic, as he raised his hand; since he was stuck with Lavenza, he had to let Lavenza ride in the passenger seat.
"I can also take three people," volunteered Link, refusing to be outdone by Sonic; Zelda would undoubtedly take up one of the three spots in Link's truck.
"Alright, I will get a card at the hospital and we'll sign it outside her room," stated Zelda, and Mario was impressed by the princess taking charge as he nodded his head with a pleased smile.
"Okay, good, so everyone who's-a going will be down there together," stated Mario, although that clearly wasn't the plan that Zelda had in mind. "Excellent! Good-a work, Princess Zelda."
"I was thinking that maybe we could do separate trips…"
"Yay, Zelda! I will drive-a as well. Who wants shotgun?"
"You can't be serious," frowned Red the Pokemon Trainer, who wouldn't want a ride with Mario even if he had to go to the emergency room. Or a Pokemon Center, if there was one in town. "You almost ran over a woman the other morning."
"Everyone-a inside the car was fine, Red! Cappy will tell-a you, as living proof."
Mario: Guess what, I have flaws. What are they? Oh, I don't know. I sing-a in the shower. Sometimes I spend too much-a time volunteering. Occasionally I'll hit somebody with my car, or smack them in-a the leg with a weapon. So sue me…no, don't sue me. That is the opposite-a of the point that I'm trying to make.
Mario and a couple of select residents arrived at the UW Medical Center and were heading down the hallway to see Little Mac. They were meant to visit in small groups, but Mario found a way to finesse the hospital staff.
"Dunno about you guys, but I hate hospitals," Sonic confessed to the others, as the gang arrived at Little Mac's room. In my mind, they are associated with sickness." Inside the room, they saw Little Mac fast asleep, with Doc Louis sitting next to him.
"Ah, I see that you finally came," Doc Louis said quietly to Mario and company as if he was expecting visitors. Staying at the hospital against the staff's wishes will make you feign for any kind of visitation. "Take a look at Mac…he looks like an angel."
"He looks awful," commented Shantae, as she noticed a few discreet marks on Little Mac's face – marks that Mario had never mentioned to anyone.
"He always looks-a like that…" said an awfully defensive Mario, as Doc Louis looked at Little Mac's face for himself and saw the marks that Shantae had noticed. "…that is not my fault. He must be in a coma."
"I think he's awake," observed Link, as he saw Little Mac's opening ever so slightly. That was Mario's cue to walk over to Little Mac's bed, speaking as if he was a ghost.
"Ooooohhhhh, Little Mac…I brought all your friends-a from the mansion. Well, most of your friends." Soon Little Mac opened his eyes, and after he rubbed them, he saw Mario, Link, Shantae, and the other visitors standing in his midst.
"At the same time?" questioned Little Mac, wondering how Mario was able to fit so many people inside his hospital room – and how he managed to do so without getting into any trouble. "This is weird."
"Hello, Little Mac," Mega Man greeted the boxer, as Mario momentarily stepped out of the room and came back seconds later holding several balloons. No hospital trip would be complete without balloons for the patient.
"Brought you some balloons. Why don't we…" said Mario as he wrapped the balloons around Little Mac's IV. Very questionable decision-making. "…here you go. Tie these up, cheer up your tubes…" Suddenly the IV popped out, alarming Mario greatly. "Mama mia! Nurse, nurse!"
"Don't bother the nurse, just put it back in," Little Mac said to Mario, who was growing panicky as he didn't know what to do. Mario was groaning as the IV was dripping unto the floor.
"I am going to be sick…I'm gonna puke." Mario was feeling lightheaded, on the verge of fainting as he tried to remedy the situation. But no matter what he did, he was nearly making things even worse.
"I wouldn't…I wouldn't worry about it," Link advised Mario, who was still feeling lightheaded as a nurse ran inside the room after hearing Mario's call. "Don't touch it."
"What, what are you doing?" the nurse frowned at Mario, before snatching the IV away from the plumber. "Just gimme that." The nurse placed the IV back where it was, saving the day.
"Thanks," Little Mac thanked the nurse, as Wario applauded the nurse for her heroics. The nurse would leave the room, likely to get away from Mario's shenanigans.
"Does it hurt terribly?" Wii Fit Trainer asked Little Mac, wanting to see how Little Mac was coming along with the recovery progress. She was the one who diagnosed Little Mac's injury, after all.
"No, it's not too bad. They have me on a lot of painkillers."
"Oh really, what kind?" Snake asked as he perked up, wanting Little Mac to give him the rundown of every drug in his system. "Codeine, Vicodin, Percocet, Fentanyl, Oxycontin, Palladone?"
"I have no idea. But it was great of all of you to come and visit me. I'll see you guys at the mansion real soon."
"Oh, OK...Wait up, wait up, guys, hold-a on a second," Mario said to his gang, who was about to leave Little Mac's room and head back home. Everyone had no choice but to stay behind. "You know what I was thinking might-a be sort of fun? Is if you forgave me in front of everybody."
"Mario, I'm not gonna do that." Little Mac couldn't possibly apologize to Mario, for he was harboring quite a grudge with the plumber.
"Cause you know what they say in the Bible about forgiveness? Forgiveness is next-a to Godliness."
"No, that's not - that's next to cleanliness," corrected Simon, who ought to have a Bible study with Mario just to educate the plumber.
"You almost broke my leg," Little Mac said to Mario, as Doc Louis didn't like how tense things were between his protege and Mario.
"Look, I just..." said Mario, desperately wanting to make peace with Little Mac so that he wouldn't have a cloud of regret hanging over him. "...I don't understand-a what is preventing you from laughing this off and giving me a big hug."
"You're not forgiven." Little Mac didn't want any apology from Mario, and that left Mario with no choice but to take matters into his own hands.
"Come on." Mario started to climb onto the bed with Little Mac, in an ill-advised attempt to hug the boxer. Little Mac was screaming at Mario to get off.
"Mario! Mario!" Doc Louis shouted at the plumber, as the nurse ran back to Little Mac's room once she heard that trouble was afoot.
Mario: Do I need to be liked? Absolutely not. I would-a prefer to be liked. I don't mind it. I don't really have-a to be liked. But it's not like a compulsive need to be liked. Like my need-a to be praised. Which I don't need.
Rosalina was down in the lobby area of the hospital, as she was waiting on Ganondorf. Also in the lobby was Corrin, who was getting his daughter Kana something from the vending machine. Rosalina had already informed Corrin that Sparkles was in Ganondorf's hands.
"Here you go, little one!" Corrin smiled at Kana, handing his daughter a bag of potato chips; Kana accepted her bag of chips, as Ganondorf entered the hospital along with Steve.
"Any problems with Sparkles?" Rosalina asked Ganondorf, as Corrin and Kana looked over at Ganondorf hoping to hear a good report from the demon lord.
"Well, you left the TV on in your room..." replied Ganondorf, before catching Corrin and Kana with the corner of his eye now reluctant to keep on speaking. "...and the cat is also dead."
"What?!" Rosalina was left shocked and devastated, as Corrin was hoping that Ganondorf was referring to some other cat. Kana's eyes began welling up with tears.
"Sparkles, the brown cat, is dead," confirmed Steve, and the news was enough to break Kana's poor heart as the young girl was quietly sobbing. Corrin held his daughter tight, as he brought Kana over to Steve and company.
"This is impossible...I thought she had more time," said the prince, unable to come to terms with the fact that Sparkles, a cat that he adopted for his own daughter, was now dead. "Did she look...when you saw her how was she looking?"
"Really dead, like a...just a dead cat," replied Ganondorf, who noticed Kana sobbing away; the demon lord knelt down at Kana, doing his best to cheer up the young girl. "Come on, don't be sad. She's in a better place.
"Alright," said Kana, wiping her tears away with her sleeve while Steve just stood around and did nothing to comfort her. Probably found himself too classy to offer any kind of solace.
"Actually the place that she's in is the freezer, because of the odor," Steve plainly stated, as Ganondorf gave the craftsman a frown. Kana immediately went back to sobbing, crying out a few more tears.
Mario and his crew returned to the mansion, and everyone was gathered in the foyer where Kana was crying her eyes out about Sparkles. Ganondorf and Steve were present, as Zelda was sitting next to Kana comforting her.
"It's gonna be okay," Zelda assured the crying Kana, patting her gently on her head. Mario saw Kana in her moment of despair and was feeling bad about it.
"Okay, you know what?" the plumber spoke up, as he commanded the attention of everyone that was standing around. "Everybody, let's just get over the whole-a Little Mac thing. He had his leg-a injured, a tiny little crack. He's going to be fine, so let's just..."
"Mario, Kana's cat died," Zelda informed the plumber, and just like that Mario was absolutely gutted - hearing about anyone losing a pet would do that to an honest man.
"Sparkles?" Mario asked Kana, who nodded her head; Mario sighed, knowing what it was like to lose a pet even though he never had that feeling better. "Mama mia...I'm sorry, Kana. Man, what a day huh? Could it get any worse?"
"I'll tell you what's going on...it's Friday the 13th," stated Lavenza, with some frightened by what the young girl said. It was Friday the 13th, after all - the calendar didn't lie. "The mansion is cursed, and we need to do something about it."
Sonic: Apparently, I am taking responsibility for ending the curse. It is up to me to get rid of the curse that struck Sparkles and killed him... *pauses* ...killed her. I'm not superstitious, but…I am a little-stitious.
"Start a conversation," Lavenza whispered into Sonic's ear, wanting the blue hedgehog to take charge. Sonic was nervous at first as he looked around until the perfect conversation starter came to mind.
"Did anyone do anything involving an Indian burial ground?" Sonic asked the others, confusing everyone while Lavenza was looking on with her lips pursed. "Like park on it. Or dig up a body...Itsuki? Anything you want to tell us?"
"No, I did not violate an Indian burial ground," Itsuki defended himself, as desecrating a sacred burial ground just wasn't his style. "In fact, I had some good luck recently; Zeeks Pizza, picked my business card out of the basket, so...uh, my friends and I got a week of free pies."
"Perfect..." grumbled Ganondorf, who was hating on Itsuki for no good reason - must pay a lot to be so cynical. "...so our tragedy is your good luck."
"Sparkles never hurt a soul," stated Corrin, still in pure disbelief that Sparkles was taken away from his daughter so soon. "God in your infinite wisdom how could you do this? She wasn't ready. She had so much left to accomplish."
"She is only a cat," Steve plainly stated, as if he wanted a gold medal for stating the most obvious things in the universe. He'd have a Guinness World Record for most gold medals if that were the case.
"You never...you don't like them."
"Cats do not provide milk or wool or meat."
"Steve, please!" Ike scolded the craftsman for his insensitivity, as Steve just stood there believing that he did or said anything wrong.
"Steve, you haven't seen-a Little Mac yet, have you?" Mario asked the craftsman, in an attempt to keep Steve away from hurting anyone's feelings.
"No, I have not. I have been very busy crafting as of late."
"Well, I think you should-a go to the hospital and pay your respects."
"I do not respect him, but I will go." So Steve left the mansion, electing to take his insensitivity out the door with him.
"Alright, I would now like to discuss-a each of your individual religious beliefs. You started it, Sonic, so you have-a the floor."
"Oh, Mario, you can't ask about religious beliefs..." stated Lucario, believing that now was not the right time for having religious conversations.
"Satan is a master of lies. Everything he says-a is the opposite."
"Alright, well then you can ask about religious beliefs, Sonic."
"Thank you for the permission," Sonic thanked Lucario as he held his hand out to the aura Pokemon for a handshake - only to fake him out by pulling his hand away at the last minute. "Psych! Alright. Let's just go around the room, and tell us what you believe in."
"I'm Catholic," stated Simon; being the most religious out of the residents, if not the most religion-oriented, it was no surprise that he went first.
"Presbyterian," stated Falco, shocking many folks in the foyer as not a single soul had ever seen Falco attend a church service of any kind.
"Oh me too," Fox said to Falco as he put his hand up for a high five, with Falco high-fiving his friends. Birds of a feather stick together.
"Sylvia and I each follow a different religion," stated Travis, seemingly proud of this very fact as he cracked a smile. "It keeps things spicy."
"That's why we're cursed," stated Corrin, slightly unnerved by the residents following different religions. Thought that it contributed to the bad mojo.
Dovahkiin: I've been involved in a number of cults, both as a leader and a follower. You have more fun as a follower, but you make more gold as a leader.
"Shantae, you are Hindu most likely, so you believe-a in Buddha," Mario said to the half-genie, inferring her religion from her appearance and outfit alone - as well as her species. Perhaps one of the gravest mistakes one could do.
"That's Buddhist," responded Shantae, and Mario had no clue what to say in response - he thought that Shantae had completely owned him.
"Well if you're going to reduce my identity to my religion, then I'm an Arab," stated Altair, getting his religious affiliation out of the way before Mario could make any assumptions about him. "But I also like Hip-hop and NPR, thanks to the Internet, and I'm restoring a 1967 Corvette in my spare time."
Steve: As an occasional farmer, I know that when an animal is sick, sometimes the right thing to do is to put it out of its misery. With the electricity we are using to keep Little Mac alive we could power a small fan for two days. You tell me what is unethical.
Steve was at the hospital paying Little Mac a visit, and he was standing too close to Little Mac for his comfort. Doc Louis had told Steve multiple times to give Little Mac some room but gave up after his requests were ignored.
"Blink once if you want me to pull the plug," Steve said to Little Mac as he had his hand inches away from the plug. Little Mac and Doc Louis were warily looking on.
"Don't pull any plugs," Doc Louis warned Steve, pointing his finger menacingly at the craftsman. Steve took his hand away, as a male intern entered Little Mac's room.
"How are you doing Little Mac?" the intern asked the boxer, feeling guilty that he wasn't referring to Little Mac by his last name. Little Mac's fault for not even having a last name.
"Better, thank for asking," replied Little Mac, as Steve was taking a brief gander at the intern and creeping him out with the way that he was staring.
"Are you a doctor, or a male nurse?" Steve curiously asked the intern, who eyed around the hospital room wondering why Steve was so interested in knowing.
"Um...I'm an intern," stated the intern, who was growing uncomfortable the more that Steve was staring at him. "Which makes me a doctor, but..."
"His chart doesn't indicate that she had a vasectomy but she did, or at least she got time off for one.
"Ah, so uh...so that's what happened to his scrotum. Um, Little Mac, your last tetanus shot was when you were bitten by a bat a few months ago?"
"Yes. Steve here, let one in while trying to get it shelter," explained Little Mac as he glared at the guilty craftsman, who accepted his guilt as he...literally just stood there and did absolutely nothing.
"It also says you were recently bitten by a raccoon?"
"And a rat. Separate occasions."
"You spend your whole-a life trying to be a good person, and then you injure-a one person with your nightstick," said Mario, continuing the conversation in the foyer that was started by Sonic. The plumber looked down at the floor and sighed. "And it's not even a name-a brand one, and everybody gets on-a your case. Doesn't make any sense...God is dead."
"If there was a God then Akihiko and I would be married by now," said Shantae; Ahikihiko happened to pass through the foyer sipping his coffee when he heard Shantae's words, as he quickly made a U-turn.
"Maybe believing in God was the mistake. What did people believe-a in before? The sun? Maybe there's some sort-a of animal that we could make a sacrifice to. Like a giant buffalo, or some-a sort of monster, like something with the body of a walrus-a with the head of a sea lion. Or something with the body of an egret with-a the head of a meerkat. Or just...the head-a of a monkey, with the antlers of a reindeer, with, ah...the body of a porcupine."
"I will do some research," volunteered Link as he ran out of the foyer, likely heading to the computer room. Zelda watched as her husband left, refusing to be left behind with Mario and his delusional self.
"I can help you with that," Zelda said to Mario before leaving the foyer herself, looking to see where Link had run off to.
Following his visit to the hospital, Steve returned to the mansion...but first, he stopped by Mario's house. There, he had to let Mario in on some news regarding Little Mac.
"So, just to be safe they are giving him the rabies vaccine," Steve informed Mario, as he and the plumber were having a private conversation. As expected, the news shocked Mario to the core.
"Mama mia, rabies?" fretted Mario, as Steve nodded his head; the thought of Little Mac potentially having rabies made Mario paranoid. "I was in the hospital room-a with him. How contagious is that, is that like an STD?
"No. You have to be bitten by something. The doctor said it was lucky he came into the hospital, cause the only way to beat rabies, is to start treatment before the symptoms set in...lockjaw."
Unable to take it anymore, Mario ventured into his living room, where Spyro and Hunter were playing video games with Sonic and Crash. Lavenza was present with Sonic.
"I know most of you are upset-a with me for endangering Little Mac's life by hitting him with that nightstick," Mario said to the four men in the living room, as Sonic paused the game and allowed the others to focus their attention on Mario. "But it may make you feel a little better to know-a that before that happened, Steve endangered Mac's life-a by letting that one bat in."
"Six of one, really," stated Sonic, who recalled seeing six bats flying around in the mansion. After hearing the news from Mario, Lavenza shook her head in great dismay.
"The mansion is so cursed..." the young girl lamented, as Sonic gave her a nervous look fearing that what Lavenza was saying might be true.
"Turns out Little Mac has been-a exposed to rabies," stated Mario, almost certain that Doc Louis was exposed to rabies too since he was been staying at the hospital with Little Mac for about two weeks. "Which is like ten-a times worse than a little crack in your leg. Thanks to me he went to the hospital and I saved his life. The curse is broken. The curse-a is broken people! Oh...there is a God, and he has a plan-a for us after all." Crash would stand up and applaud Mario, while Lavenza remained certain that a curse had plagued the mansion.
Mario: Is there a God? If not, what are all the churches-a for? And who is Jesus' dad?
Some very interesting stuff went down last week when Coco gave Tails a kiss on the cheek and caused him to blush. In front of Cloud and Meta Knight no less. The buddy cops were certain that Tails and Coco were an item, and wanted to keep tabs on them. So when the Crash clan stopped by, Toon Link and Young Link went on spying duty.
"Oh well, if they aren't together now, then they probably never will be," Toon Link said to Young Link, as the buddy cops kept themselves concealed behind the mansion as they kept a close eye for Tails and Coco.
"I thought they'd be good together, like PB&J," responded Young Link, who was doing more surveillance work than his partner-in-crime as he was looking through his binoculars. "Coco Bandicoot and Tails...what a waste."
"I told you I'm not dating anyone," Coco said to Meta Knight as she and the Star Warrior were passing through the backyard - a couple of yards away from the buddy cops, who weren't even noticing. "And even if I was, I don't think it's anyone's business. I mean, when I do fall in love, like when it's for real, the last person I'm gonna talk about it is a camera crew or you guys. Trust me, when I fall in love, you'll know."
"Good to know," Meta Knight said to Coco, coming to a stop as Coco kept on walking. The Star Warrior turned around and saw the buddy cops doing their spy work, only to shake his head.
As news about Little Mac having rabies reached the mansion and spread around, folks came to an agreement that something must be done. That's when Lavenza convinced Sonic to make a suggestion to Mario and Master Hand...and it was a suggestion that both the plumber and giant hand were on board with. The idea that Sonic had in mind...was a fun run.
Sonic: Lavenza really convinced me to suggest doing a fun run for "rabies awareness". *groans deeply* I still think that I'm being punished. I'm being made to look like a fool.
Mario: No man or woman shouldn't have-a to be hit by a nightstick, to learn-a that they may have rabies. But that is where-a we are in America. And that does not sit-a right with me. And that is why, as a recommendation from-a Sonic, I'm hosting a fun run race for the cure for rabies. To raise awareness of the fact that there is a cure-a for rabies. A disease that has largely been eradicated-a in the US. But not very many people know that.
Of course, you can't have a fun run without drumming up local support. That was why Mario asked Joker, owner of Cafe Leblanc, to contact local businesses in the Seattle area to see if they were interested in funding the fun run.
"No, rabies...babies would be a good idea," Joker spoke into a phone, as Mario entered Cafe Leblanc to see how much progress Joker made so far. "Can I put you down for a dime?"
"Hi, Joker, how many sponsors so far?" Mario asked the young man, hoping to hear some good news; unfortunately for him, he would be receiving the exact opposite.
"Zero." This was bad news to Mario, who was so incensed that he wanted to grab the cafe countertop and flip it over. It was at that moment he wished that he had Incredible Hulk strength.
"Come on man, gotta step-a it up! It's for a good cause. Princess Peach pledged-a $500 not so long ago."
"Isn't that your money?" Wolf asked Mario, being all technical with the plumber who was now looking around at the cafe all sheepishly.
"That...is for a good cause. Knitting club, how's the rabies quilt-a coming?" Mario went over to speak with the knitting club members - Yoshi, Toad, Ashley, Pac-Man, Alm, and Celica - who were in the cafe knitting away.
"Oh, it's coming," replied Celica, as she and the knitting club members showed off their progress so far to Mario. Mario liked what he saw.
"Oh, look-a at that, three. Way to honor Little Mac, you guys." All the knitting club members were proud of their work...except for Pac-Man, who had been feigning to leave the club for years now.
"Mario, you cannot make me run," Wario said to the plumber, who thought that Wario was using his weight as an excuse for not participating in something. Wouldn't be the fatso's first time resorting to such measures. "It is not a real charity! It's stupid Mario, and I'm not gonna do it."
"Alright, alright..." Mario tried to walk away from Wario, but Wario wouldn't let Mario get away as he followed the plumber out of the cafe.
"You didn't run for me when I thought I had skin cancer."
"I know that you're probably scared of people seeing your fat-a legs in shorts. Well back in olden times, a large fat person, like this, was a person of power. A person-a who had money and could buy food, a person of respect. Like the boss-a of the day. Whereas, someone athletic and trim, like myself, was someone who worked-a in the fields...and I was a peasant."
"I just don't want to run. I ruined both of my sneakers, and my clothes are ill-fitting."
"Well, you're going to have to run, or you're going to be in a lot-a of trouble. It is not olden times anymore."
Terry: *in the bathroom* I'm petrified of nipple chafing. Once it starts it is a vicious circle. If you have sensitive nipples, they chafe, so they become more sensitive, so they chafe more. So...I take precautions. *tapes a cotton ball to each nipple*
Done taping the cotton balls to his nipples, Terry exited the bathroom and went down the hallway. He would come across Corrin and Kana, who were both sitting on a bench as Corrin comforted his saddened daughter.
"Hey, Kana, um...I'm sorry about your cat," Terry offered his condolences to the young girl, in an attempt to cheer her up. But instead, he made her cry. Terry walked away, feeling bad about what he did.
Kana: This is Sparkles. *holds up a picture* She was like my best friend. I kept her going through countless ailments. Rosalina trusted Ganon and Steve to take care of Sparkles while she was away, and Sparkles is now deceased. This is Halloween last week... *holds up a picture of Kana holding Sparkles* ...just a couple of kittens... *starts to cry* ...out on the town.
Corrin: Sparkles was left in the hands of Ganondorf...and died. Let it now be known that a demon lord can't be trusted to do a decent job.
As Corrin comforted Kana, he saw Samus walk by carrying a box of mechanical parts. Samus didn't look like she wanted to be bothered right now - then again, that described her mood at all times - but Corrin chose to shoot his shot anyway.
"Pssst, I'm having trust issues," Corrin whispered to Samus, catching the attention of the bounty hunter as he brought her to a halt. Samus saw Corrin and went over to the prince against her own will. "And since you're always having trust issues, I thought you'd be able to give me some advice."
"What's wrong?" Samus asked Corrin, entertaining the prince only because of Kana's presence. In any other instance, Corrin would be getting the cold shoulder.
"I have this crazy thought, that I know is crazy. That maybe Ganondorf and Steve conspired to kill Kana's cat. When I went to Steve's room, Sparkles' body was in the freezer where Steve said he left her, but all his bags of frozen french fries had been clawed to shreds. Something's not right. Rosalina said the vet's doing an autopsy."
"Corrin, I'm sorry about your daughter's cat."
"Did Ridley ever kill one of your cats?"
"I'm more of a dog person, truth be told." Samus would walk away from Corrin and Kamui, getting a good distance away from the two before muttering under her breath: "Not..."
The fun run would receive a boost in participation when the Crash clan made their intentions known to be a part of the marathon. Crash, Coco, and Crunch went back to their home to get some running gear and returned to the mansion as they got themselves ready.
"So what's your strategy for this race?" Tails asked Coco, sitting on his bed, as Coco was in Tails' room getting her stretches in. Can't risk getting injured during a fun run.
"Well, I'm gonna start fast," Coco told Tails her game plan, as she held her hand against the wall while stretching her left leg. "Then I'm gonna run fast in the middle. Then I'm gonna end fast.
"Why won't more people do that?"
"Cause they're just stupid..."
Tails: *Tails and Coco watch footage of Coco kissing Tails on his cheek on the TV** Oh, ah...No that's not...I mean that wasn't, ah...
Coco: Yeah…that was um…
Tails: I mean I can see how it would seem a bit like we uh…how it looks like um...I mean nowadays you can edit anything, right? I mean you can edit anything to look like um...anything.
Coco: Yeah, we had that picnic at the park because...
Tails: Right!
Coco:...yeah
Corrin had a grudge towards Ganondorf and Steve, believing that both men wanted Sparkles dead for their own reasons. So when the prince entered the fitness center and saw Ganondorf getting his cardio in before the fun run, he ran into the demon lord on purpose.
"Ow!" Ganondorf shouted in pain after Corrin ran into him, nearly losing his balance as he dropped the jump rope onto the floor.
"Shut up," Corrin said to Ganondorf, as he was giving the demon lord a death glare. Ganondorf had never seen the prince so incensed before.
"You're taking this out on me, but I was only the messenger. Or, well, one of the messengers."
"You'll feel better after the 7K," Steve said to Corrin, as he crept up on the prince. Why on earth was the fun run 7K? Would anyone last that long, save for a few usual suspects? "Exercise is good for depression."
"I'm not depressed I'm in grief," said Corrin as he walked away from Steve, refusing to speak with him or Ganondorf. "And Kana is the one who's grieving, not me. I'm just...disappointed."
Mario was making every effort to raise money for the fun run, and he couldn't go about alone. He depended on the lead authorities of the mansion, Link and Zelda, to come through with money on their end.
"We have raised almost-a $700, most of it from me and Peach," Mario discussed with Link, Zelda, and Master Hand in Master Hand's room, going over the finances so far. "Um...when do they put that on the giant-a check? Or is that something that we write-a in later?"
"Well, a giant check costs about $200 to make up," replied Zelda, unsure if producing a giant check was worth the effort. "I have a print shop standing by but...what do you think Mario, that's over 25% of our funds?
"Hmm...hat's a tough-a decision. Um...I always imagined it with a giant check. So..."
"Yeah, I mean I personally am definitely on board for the giant check," Link offered his two cents on the situation; if Link was on board with something, there was a ninety-five percent chance (give or take) that Zelda was on board as well.
"Giant check it is," confirmed Zelda, as she made up her mind - that print shop she made contact with had better be on standby still.
"Well, I don't know," Master Hand entered the conversation, offering a bit of skepticism about making the giant check. "On the other hand, it does leave less money for bat birth control."
"Bat birth control..." uttered Link as he furrowed his brow, wondering where Master Hand got this idea of bat birth control from.
"Wait, this money is going to bat birth control, right Mario? That's what you told me when I contributed."
"You didn't contribute very much," stated Mario - let's hope that Master Hand wasn't being stingy for rabies awareness. "I was also hoping to hand the giant check-a to a rabies doctor. And how's that been-a going?"
"Not well - a doctor won't come out to collect a check for $700, or $500 if we go with the giant check," stated Zelda; Mario was not pleased with the news, furrowing his brow as he held his finger underneath his chin.
"Which we are," stated Link, who wanted nothing more than to see the $500 check come to existence. It would make it all worth it.
"And also there is no such thing as a rabies doctor."
"What about a rabies nurse?" asked Mario, refusing to give up hope until he found someone worthy of receiving the check.
"I don't think so." Zelda would let Mario down, as Mario snapped his fingers in disgust.
"You know what though," said Link, an idea popping into mind as Mario perked up and looked at the Hylian. "I've actually seen ads for nurses that you can hire by the hour, for parties and bachelor events."
"That's possible, look-a into that," recommended Mario as he pointed at Link, expecting the Hylian to hop on it right away.
"Great, it's gonna cost a couple a hundred buck and ah...oh actually more with tips."
"Maybe we should just skip the ceremony and set up a college fund for Little Mac," suggested Master Hand, as Mario turned around and looked at the giant hand as if he was crazy. "No?"
"Must not know-a Little Mac that well, huh? He's clearly not going to college."
Luigi and Daisy were going to be a part of the fun run after Peach convinced them both to join. The married couple was in their living room, wearing their running gear, as Daisy was describing a harrowing experience to Luigi.
"So I closed the door but the image of his...dangling participle...was still burned in my eyes," Daisy described what she saw to Luigi, who was grossed out beyond words as he shared some sympathy for his wife. "Much, much worse experience than the last incident."
"Ew...I can imagine," grimaced Luigi, only imagining how he would feel if someone walked in on him while he was naked. There was a knock at the front door.
"Come in," Daisy called out to whoever was behind the door, having a slight hunch for who the visitor was.
"May I enter?" asked the person standing behind the door, Mario - just the man that Daisy suspected.
"Yes. Or come in." Come in Mario did, as he opened the front door and stepped inside Luigi's house.
"See how I did-a that?" Mario asked Luigi and Daisy...but mainly the latter, hoping that she learned from his example. "That's the way you should-a enter a house. You knock and then you wait-a for the all-clear."
"You couldn't have taken-a off all your clothes in your bed-a room?" Luigi asked Mario, having a major bone to pick with his brother for inadvertently flashing his wife.
"Yes, but I was in my own-a house, so why would I do that?" At least Spyro and Hunter weren't around while Mario was changing.
"On average, how many hours a day do you spend naked in your living room?" Daisy asked Mario, who probably went commando a handful of times whenever he was the only person at his house. Or when Peach was away. "Just ballpark."
"Europeans go naked-a in their living rooms all the time."
"They do not. Quit making things up to fit your narrative."
"Besides my shirt tail covered-a most of it so..."
"I didn't see where it started but I saw where it ended."
"Gross," Luigi sighed in disgust, again dismayed that his wife got flashed by her brother-in-law. Luigi might never let it go.
"That's not gross, it is the human body," stated Mario, who had yet to accept any fault for scarring Daisy for life. "What is your problem? Daisy, you appreciate-a art, right? Think of me as one-a of your models. Okay, you know what, I don't want this to detract-a from what we really need to be thinking about today, it's not fair to people with-a rabies. And that's the point, right? Okay, let's go have some fun."
Daisy: They say if you're nervous around someone you should picture them naked. I do not recommend this strategy. Try picturing them with more clothes on...or a funny coat.
Luigi: *naked from chest up* Oh, I'm-a sorry, is this an ordinary living room, and not a French-a beach?
It was time for the fun run to begin, as the participants were at the starting line just beyond the mansion grounds. Anna was leading the proceedings, as she was giving folks their race number to put on their chest.
"Name, please!" Anna said to Heihachi, who went up to the stand where the merchant was to receive his race number.
"Heihachi, 75 plus division," answered Heihachi, feeling confident about his chances in the fun run only because his son Kazuya wasn't involved.
"You're over 75 years old?"
"82 November 1st. How much is the prize money?"
"There's no prize money."
"What, is any of this real?"
Dr. Wily Check that out. *points to Professor E. Gadd, who is stretching* Look at me, I'm E. Gadd, I'm stretching, I know what I'm doing. Why is he even here?
"So I heard that you were peeping on Mario," Peach said to Daisy, as the two princesses and everyone else gathered around at the starting line.
"What? Look, no it was not..." Daisy defended herself, as Peach looked like she wanted to put the princess of Sarasaland in her place.
"I don't know what your deal is, but he is a married man, you know. So hands off."
"Okay everybody, listen up," said Mario, standing at the front as he had a couple of things that he wanted to share. "Thank you for coming. Before we get started I wanted to say a few words about this deadly disease-a called rabies. And I'd like you to take a look into the face of rabies." Mario turned around a picture he was holding - a picture of Little Mac in the hospital.
"I helped him take the picture," Hammer Bro whispered to Captain Falcon in a bragging manner, as Mario hoped that the picture scared everyone straight."
"That should scare-a you. It scares me. You people need to educate yourselves. Myth: 3 Americans every year die from rabies. Fact: 4 Americans every year die from rabies. How many of you know someone who has been afflicted or affected by rabies? Show of hands. One, two, three...too many to count. It is truly the silent killer. No, it is the foaming barking killer. And it is something...Donkey Kong, what are you doing?"
"I'm giving him a peanut," replied Donkey Kong, who was happily feeding an innocent squirrel a peanut. Which was counterintuitive, in Mario's eyes.
"No, don't give him...just, did you hear anything I said?"
"Look how happy he is!" Donkey Kong was amused by the squirrel, whom Mario saw as a vile critter.
"He's happy because-a he's insane. You know what, that's the perfect-a example of the kind of awareness we need to generate. Where's the nurse?" Soon a nurse entered the scene, receiving amusing looks from the others. "This is the reason we're here."
"Hello, Mario," the nurse greeted Mario, who did a double take when he saw that the nurse was in fact a Nurse Joy. Or at least a woman wearing a Nurse Joy outfit, which Mario failed to notice.
"An actual Nurse-a Joy...mama mia." Thinking that the Nurse Joy was legit, Mario handed the cosplayer the giant check. "I would like-a you to accept this check for $340 made out to science. Make sure that gets-a into the right hands."
"Great." The Nurse Joy cosplayer accepted her check and left the premises, leaving to applause, as Pit came over to Mario with a bowl of pasta.
"You got it?" Mario asked Pit, who revealed to him the bowl of pasta; the plumber took the bowl from Pit and ate the pasta whole. "Okay, fettuccine alfredo, time to carbo-load..."
Now it was time for the fun run to start, as the fake Nurse Joy got her $340 check and Mario had his fettuccine alfredo. Standing at the starting line was Pit, who was making the others nervous as he was holding a gun.
"Just remember folks, it's not about-a winning, it is about finishing," Mario said to the runners, giving them motivating words to live by as they ran their hearts out. It was all about giving your best effort.
"On your marks, get set..." said Pit as he held the gun up towards the sky, while everyone was in starting position. Except for Wily, who had snuck up on E. Gadd smiling sinisterly.
"Beow!" shouted Wily as he pantsed E. Gadd, revealing his old man underwear; embarrassing his nemesis in front of everyone made Wily feel like the happiest man on earth.
"Hey!" frowned E. Gadd, frantically pulling his pants back up as Pit fired the gunshot. The fun run had commenced, as Mario and the others were racing towards the finish line...wherever it was.
"On your left!" Fox shouted to Falco, who came to a stop and looked extremely appalled while Fox kept on running.
"C'mon man, we've already gone over this!" Falco shouted at Fox, shaking his head before he resumed running with the others.
"You're doing great Mario, look at you go!" Shulk said to the plumber, who was the leader of the pack as he wanted to outrun his peers. All in the name of spreading awareness about rabies.
"He's the man! Yeah, baby!" exclaimed an oddly sycophantic Spring Man, as he was motivated by Mario - and Mario himself was motivated by Spring Man.
"I am fast! I'm-a very fast!" shouted Mario, who was honestly surprised with how well he was doing so far. "I'm like Forrest Gump, except I am not an idiot." As Mario kept running, Spring Man, Gerudo Ganon, Shulk, and Vault Boy secretly got into a cab.
Gerudo Ganon: Oh yes I will work out today. I will work out a way to avoid running for a stupid cause.
Terry: I've walked two marathons. Pretty sure I can handle a 7K. The key is drafting, eliminating wind resistance. *runs right behind Wario*
Sonic: I'm the fastest guy in the fun run, obviously, so I'm gonna go at a snail's pace to keep myself modest. Also doing that because this fun run wasn't even my own idea. Darn you, Lavenza!
While some folks elected to run by themselves, others opted to run in groups of two or three. Tails and Coco fell in the latter category, and they weren't taking the fun run seriously as they were walking together.
"Yeah, we're in last place," Coco stated with a slight giggle, as she and Tails were walking briskly through the Seattle streets.
"Oh, would you look at that," said Tails as he saw Sonic up ahead, running slowly to keep himself "modest" and give the other runners a fighting chance. Lavenza was on the sidewalk, trying to keep up with Sonic.
"Darn it..." If Sonic ever found out that Tails and Coco were seeing each other, he would never let anyone hear the end of it.
To keep the fun runners hydrated during the marathon, select residents from the mansion and tower were positioned at stands along the course, handing out water bottles. Jill was at one such stand, as the Drill Dozer gave water to anyone that passed by.
"Water? Water?" Jill called out to the runners, as Wily grabbed a bottle of water, drank it, then threw it back at Jill as he kept on running. Soon Mario came around the corner. "Water, Mario?"
"No, no water for me," replied Mario as he ran past Jill, running like a gazelle as he galloped down the street majestically. Sort of. "Not while rabies causes-a fear of water...solidarity!"
"Mario, that's irrational." But Mario didn't care, as he wanted nothing more than to do rabies victims everywhere a huge favor.
Mario: Rabies victims…have to live-a with an irrational hatred of water their entire lives. So...least I could do.
"Oh no! My nipples, it's starting," panicked Terry, who along with Wario was right behind Mario; his nipples were bothering him at the worst possible time.
Taking an indefinite break from the fun run, the foursome of Spring Man, Gerudo Ganon, Shulk, and Vault Boy were chilling out at a bar. The four were seated outside at a table, getting a quick glass of wine.
"Can we get another round?" Spring Man asked a waitress, who came over and poured some wine into the glasses of the ARMS fighters and his amigos. "Thanks, ma'am."
"So we've got what, another twenty minutes?" asked Gerudo Ganon, before taking a sip from his cup of wine. Shulk took out his phone to check the time.
"More or less," replied Shulk, hoping that Fiora and Dunban wouldn't nag him too much for skipping out on the fun run. Provided that they even cared enough about the fun run, to begin with.
Mario started off strong at first, but now the plumber started to slog a bit. He was struggling to keep up the pace, as he felt fatigued the more he ran.
"That fettuccine is sitting in my stomach-a like a rock," Mario said to Wily, who had caught up to the plumber while looking back to make sure that E. Gadd was nowhere in sight.
"You've got nothing to worry about, I put Imodium in E. Gadd's coffee before the race," said Wily, who would absolutely lose it if E. Gadd were to somehow cross the finish line first. Just the thought of it made Wily sick to his stomach.
"Hilarious!" Mario was laughing at Wily's evil plot to sabotage E. Gadd, only to frown as he had a pressing question on his mind. "Wait, Imodium or Ex-lax?"
E. Gadd: I'm makin' great time. Usually, I have to take a bathroom break halfway through a race like this, but not today!
Tails and Coco were still walking together, as their interest in the fun run dwindled over time. At some point, they might've forgotten that they were even participating at all. That was further accentuated when Tails spotted a garage sale taking place.
"Ooo! An estate sale," marveled Tails as he and Coco came to a stop, seeing all the stuff that was for sale. "Wanna go in?"
"I don't know, I'm really committed to winning," replied Coco, who was running in place as she kept her energy levels up.
"Okay, but what if I told you all the money you spend here, goes to preventing a disease that's already been cured.
"Mmm...yes. Guess you have a point there."
"That's what I thought. Let's do some good!"
Cloud: *looks at his phone as it rings* Let's give this a shot...
Isabelle: *voice coming from the phone* You have reached the Smash Mansion in Seattle, Washington. Currently, we are out doing the Super Smash Bros rabies awareness Pro-Am fun run race for the cure...leave a message at the...
Cloud: *hangs up the phone*
"Mama mia, oh, alfredo sauce," Mario burped, feeling the fettuccine alfredo doing some twisted things to his stomach. "I'm getting a stitch." The plumber groaned as the fatigue kept on settling in.
"Watch the nipples, K. Rool..." warned Terry, who ran into the back of King K. Rool as his chaffing nipples were steadily slowing him down.
"Back off me," K. Rool clapped back at Terry, not caring for the fighter's nipples; the fact that he was able to run on foot was a miracle.
Corrin was a part of the fun run, only choosing to race to keep his mind off of Kana's dead cat. Ganondorf and Steve, also a part of the fun run, would catch up to the prince.
"Will you please stay away from me?" Ganondorf frowned at Steve, who was running side-by-side with the demon lord as Corrin crept into view. "Is your daughter feeling better?" Ganondorf asked Corrin once he and Steve caught up to him.
"No," answered Corrin as he kept his mind on the road, refusing to look either Ganondorf or Steve in the eye. The three caught up with Rosalina, who was more or less levitating.
"Well, you look cute as a button," Steve said to Rosalina, who turned her head and saw the craftsman running along with Corrin and Ganondorf. "You have worked up quite a sweat."
"The vet is removing all of Sparkles' organs right now and sending them to the lab," Rosalina informed Corrin, giving the prince an update on the status of Kana's dead cat.
"That is good, but I am a farmer, Rosalina."
"What does that mean?"
"When a farmer sees an animal that is in pain, that has no quality of life, that has no utility, a farmer does what city folk don't have the stomach to do."
"You and Ganondorf did kill her?!" Corrin gasped at Steve as he, Steve, Ganondorf, and Rosalina all came to a stop. Corrin was stunned that his theory had in fact come true.
"I...I sang her, her favorite songs," stated Ganondorf, refusing to go down a sinking ship with Steve. Anyone but Steve.
"You put her in your freezer," Corrin said to Steve, having found enough evidence to prove that Steve was a cat murderer.
"It was beautiful and gentle and respectful," Steve defended his actions, believing that he did the right thing by letting nature take its course. "I fed her antihistamines and she gradually fell asleep."
"Well, then she barfed them up in the freezer and tried to get out."
"I am not responsible for that."
"You!" Corrin smacked Steve by hitting him square in the chest, and Steve took it like a man.
"Ow." Steve barely even flinched, as Ganondorf and Rosalina looked around and saw onlookers.
"It's okay," Rosalina assured one onlooker, a man who was casually watering the grass in his front yard.
"It's nothing, he's robbing her," Ganondorf said to the man, not doing much to make Corrin and Steve seem remotely innocent.
"How could you do that without telling me or Kana?" Corrin asked Steve, wondering why Ganondorf never butted in and stopped Steve from freezing Sparkles.
"I thought I was helping you," replied Steve, painfully oblivious to how upset Corrin was feeling right now. So insensitive. "I expected a hug. I took care of that cat, the best way I knew how.
"Cat Heaven is a beautiful place, but you don't get there if you're euthanized."
"I know a great taxidermist," stated Ganondorf, as Mario was creeping up on Ganondorf and company while he became more and more fatigued. "I will pay to have her stuffed. Well, he's not great, but he's pretty good."
"Take bat bites-a seriously, don't get bit," a nearly out of breath Mario said to Ganondorf and the others as he ran past the four. That fettuccine alfredo was really kicking his butt.
"Or we can have her buried out at the east field," proposed Steve, electing to bury Sparkles as a way to take responsibility for killing her. "How about it, Corrin?" Steve held out his hand to Corrin, who slapped it away.
"Don't touch me, Steve!" Corrin shouted at the craftsman as he ran away, fighting back the tears. Rosalina and Ganondorf both watched as Corrin ran off, feeling bad over the fact that they might've goofed up for their own different reasons.
Coco: You like it? *holds up lamp* It's kinda designy and cool, it was eight dollars.
Tails: Oh, and I get to carry it.
Tails and Coco both had a good time at the garage sale and had reinserted themselves into the fun run once they were done looking around. They were far away from the finish line...which was eventually crossed by E. Gadd. Uh oh.
"And the winner is Professor Elvin Gadd!" cheered E. Gadd as he raised his fists in celebration; Wily's worst nightmare had now come true.
"And coming in second place...Terry Bogard!" cheered Terry as he was next to cross the finish line, happy to know that his chapped nipples didn't bring him down. Now he had something else to brag about to his friends when they came to town.
"Have a seat, I'll write it down," Samus said to E. Gadd and Terry, as she was sitting at a table that was about rabies awareness. Both E. Gadd and Terry were slightly confused upon seeing Samus.
"Where are we?" asked E. Gadd as he looked around, figuring that he and Terry somehow got lost and that his win was invalidated.
"I dunno, like seven kilometers from the mansion."
"He couldn't have made it a circle?"
Mario: *bent over* I am not-a going to finish. I can't beat-a rabies. Nobody can beat rabies, rabies has been-a around for a thousand years. I was a fool-a to think that I could beat it. *Spring Man, Gerudo Ganon, Shulk, and Vault Boy pass by in the cab and get out at the finish line*
Mario was all tuckered out, as he was unable to cross the finish line as many others had done. The plumber made a trek back down the course, as he was sitting on the ground completely exhausted. Luigi, Daisy, Tails, and Coco all came across the tired Mario.
"What are you doing here?" Luigi asked Mario as he and the others came to a stop to see if Mario was okay. "Did you come-a back for us, or..."
"I can't finish," replied Mario, who was sweating buckets as the feeling in his legs was entirely nonexistent. "I feel-a so weak, I just..."
"Well, you're probably dehydrated."
"What do you want-a me to do Luigi?"
"Glass-a of water would be a start."
"No! There are people all over the world, who have all sorts-a of problems and afflictions, and diseases. They're deformed, and they're abnormal, and...they're illiterate and ugly. Symphonies don't have-a any money. Public TV is bust. I can't do anything about it, I can't...you know. There's just one-a of me, and there's a thousand-a of them. And rabies wins."
"Wow! You are a downer," Tails said to Mario, greatly dismayed by the defeatist attitude that the plumber was eschewing. "We were having a pretty nice day."
"I'm still having a nice day," stated Coco, before directing Mario's attention to the lamp that Tails was forced to hold as she held it up. "Hey Mario, look at this lamp. Eight dollars."
"That's a good deal." Mario sounded impressed, as Coco came over to Mario and knelt down to give the plumber a heart-to-heart.
"And Mario, you don't have rabies. And chances are you're not going to get it anytime soon. So...you don't really have to think about it too much."
"Coco, if everybody felt-a that way, nothing would get done."
"Yeah, but there's other, better people out there who are helping."
"You guys just don't think I am capable, of making a difference."
"We know you, Mario - besides, I saw you naked," Daisy said to the plumber, as Tails and Coco both looked at the princess with disgusted, sympathetic looks.
"You don't, you don't know me. You've just seen-a my extremities. I can make a difference, remember, I'm the one who started this whole-a thing off by hitting Little Mac with that nightstick. And I owe it to him-a to finish this 7K..." Mario got up, groaning in exhaustion, as Luigi tried to help. "...no, no!"
Mario: Finishing that 7K, was the hardest-a thing I have ever had to do. I ate more fettuccine alfredo and drank-a less water than I have in my entire life. People always talk about triumphs-a of the human spirit, well today I had a triumph of the human body. That's why everybody was applauding me at the end. My guts-a and my heart, and while I eventually puked-a my guts out, I never puked my heart out. And I'm very, very proud-a of that.
Mario did manage to finish the fun run on his own two feet, as he triumphantly crossed the line. But ultimately, he paid the price as he had to go to the hospital to be treated for hydration. Left to suffer from his questionable dietary choices, Mario was laying in his hospital bed sucking on a lollipop as he got a visit from two familiar faces.
"Hey, Mario," greeted Doc Louis, who entered the hospital room along with Little Mac. Little still had a cast over his right leg, as he was now in a wheelchair.
"Hello Doc Louis, Little Mac," Mario greeted the two, as Doc Louis wheeled Little Mac over to Mario - and felt like a proud papa doing it. "How ya doing, Mac?"
"Better," smiled Little Mac, as he was making good progress with his leg healing. He was bound to be discharged from the hospital anytime soon.
"It's ironic, isn't it? I mean I'm in the hospital for not getting enough-a water, and you're in it for a disease-a that causes the fear of water."
"I'm in because you injured my leg. But I wanted to say, I heard you were trying really hard, so I'm not mad at you anymore."
"Thanks, I'm not mad-a at you anymore." Mario let out a sigh, as he took the lollipop out of his mouth and offered it to Little Mac. "Wanna share?"
Lavenza: Mario is at the same hospital as Little Mac. If the success of the fun run brings the two together, then today will be a success! It will be a victory for you, Sonic.
Sonic: Lavenza, if you make me suggest any more stupid ideas, I just might have to cut you off...
Lavenza: You can't me off just yet. We still have a lot more work to do. *smiles*
Sonic: Long as Amy doesn't get too involved...I think we should be good.
"Sure," Little Mac reluctantly replied, unsure of whether he should accept the lollipop or not. Who knew how much of Mario's saliva was on it.
"I'm not really sick," said Mario, as Little Mac took a lick from the lollipop before handing it back to Mario. "Nah, I'm-a good."
Mario and Little Mac were able to make amends in just two weeks after the whole nightstick incident...never took Nancy Kerrigan and Tonya Harding that long to do the same.
