Author's Note:

After more than ten long years, we have a sequel to Mario Strikers: Charged...Mario Strikers: Battle League! Unfortunately, there is no Daisy in the game... *sniffs* ...but I hope to see her in the upcoming DLC. The lack of Daisy could explain why I lost so many games in the First Kick demo. With Battle League hitting the shelves today, this chapter will be soccer-themed. Funny how I've covered soccer four times in this story. Let's answer a few reviews:

"Does Captain Falcon watched the NFL? If so, is he a huge Atlanta Falcon fan due to his falcon motifs? Is Captain Falcon associated with Peregrine Falcon since Peregrine Falcon is the fastest bird due to its diving speed?"

Captain Falcon is indeed a fan of the Atlanta Falcons, although he is more lowkey about it compared to Falco. And I would definitely associate Captain Falcon with the Peregrine Falcon. David with some questions:

"Will we see Kasumi Yoshizawa have some screen time in the next chapter? (Sorry for asking, she really is feeling underrated right now). Will Ryuji or Dark Pit pull a Kevin Owens on Pit over the Elias and Ezekiel debate? (Since Pit would think that Ezekiel and Elias are not the same person). Will the Capcom Fighting Collection chapter be pushed back due to Fire Emblem Warriors: Three Hopes coming out on the same day? Will Ryu and Ken have their looks changed due to Street Fighter 6 coming out? And finally, what did you think of the MJF Pipebomb promo and AEW removing his name from their website and shop site in the aftermath?"

Kasumi is underrated at the moment; I'll try and squeeze her into next week's chapter. Would love to do a debate with those two. I'll be covering the Capcom Fighting Collection chapter along with Three Hopes (and Sonic Origins). Ryu and Ken may have their looks updated. And I didn't catch much of MJF's promo, but for the sake of AEW, and its fans, I hope that this whole MJF deal is a work. Because if not, then the inevitable fallout will be ugly...REAL ugly. Ending it off with The Reader:

"I swear man, you better not humiliate Mario in the Mario Strikers episode next week. Don't want a repeat of the Mario Party episode and the Switch Sports episode!"

No worries, Mario won't be humiliated in this chapter. He won't be making a fool of himself this time around...


Episode 338: Fútbol

No one at the mansion was more dead-set on having Kirby and Adeleine get married than Pit. In fact, Pit was the only person at the mansion (let alone on the entire planet) that personally wanted to see Kirby tie the knot with Adeleine. It was Pit's goal to make his best friend become a married man before 2022's end.

But of course, Kirby and Adeleine couldn't get married without a wedding. And they couldn't have a wedding without a wedding officiant. Pit believed that he had the right one fall into his lap when Toadsworth came to town to visit Luigi and Daisy on their anniversary. Before he could fully entice Toadsworth, Luigi and Daisy took the elderly Toad out of Pit's grasp.

Even with the minor setback he suffered, Pit was still determined to make Kirby's wedding a reality. He figured that he would have to rally support from his peers so that he wouldn't be the only one committed to making his wonderful dream come true. First, he had to start with the guy at the top...Master Hand.

"Glad that you could take some time out of your day to speak with me," Pit showed his appreciation towards Master Hand, who invited the angel to his room for what he hoped would be a relatively short conversation.

"Yes, unfortunately, this is the time of day when I'm not that busy," responded Master Hand, before having to switch it up before he further hurt Pit's feelings. Didn't want Viridi getting on him. "Um, I mean, what is it that you wanted to talk about?"

"It's about love. Love is in the air, Master Hand." Pit held his arms out wide, in an effort to instill positivity within Master Hand. The only feeling Pit gave Master Hand instead was fear.

"Oh no - don't tell me that Shantae and Akihiko are an item! Those rumors...I thought the rumors were untrue!" Captain Falcon and Nowi, Master Hand would accept, but Shantae and Akihiko? That was enough to make him vomit.

"Ew, what? No, that's just gross! I'm here to tell you about an item that will actually work - Kirby and Adeleine!" Just saying Kirby and Adeleine's names together filled Pit up with pride and joy.

"Ah, Adeleine! Kirby's lady friend!" As Master Hand thought of all the nice things about Adeleine, a curious question appeared in his mind. "You don't honestly believe they're seeing each other, do you?"

"Maybe they are, but they're good at hiding it. And as Kirby's best friend, it is my goal to witness Kirby marrying his true love, Adeleine! Preferably this year."

"You want to see Kirby...marry Adeleine?" It took a whole lot in Master Hand to force himself to finish that sentence. "Hmm...ISABELLE!"

"Did you call me, Master Hand?" asked Isabelle as she showed up right at Master Hand's door after being called. Her ability to show up whenever Master Hand called her name was nothing short of impeccable.

"Can you inspect Pit, and look for any signs of coke?" So Isabelle entered Master Hand's room and did a rough inspection of Pit, from head to toe. "Check his nose, see if he snorted any before stepping foot inside my room."

"Silly Master Hand, everyone knows you can't snort soda!" Pit laughed at Master Hand, at first acting happy and jovial before his face slightly soured. The hard truth was slowly settling in. "Unless..."

"I see no signs of coke on Pit," announced Isabelle, who had checked every inch of Pit - his wings, his sandals, and even behind his ears. "He's clean as a whistle."

"Did you check the inside of his pants?" asked Master Hand, as Isabelle nervously bit her lip as she looked understandably reluctant. "Come on woman, you're acting like Pit isn't wearing any underwear!"

"Dang it, Master Hand, how did you figure me out?" frowned Pit, disgusted that his big secret was discovered - never mind the fact that he went almost about every day without a pair of undies. "Also, what's the point of this inspection?"

"It was a drug test, Pit, to see if you were taking drugs." Finally, the truth Pit like a slap to the face, as Pit gasped in shock.

Master Hand: We seldom have drug tests done at the mansion. In the extremely rare chance that we do, I typically let Isabelle handle them. Would let the buddy cops do it, but only Isabelle is certified...Where is Isabelle's certification, you ask? I reckon that she threw her certificate away in the garbage by accident. Or so I would like to believe.

"Me? Taking drugs?" questioned Pit, baffled that Master Hand would make such a huge accusation. "What did I ever say or do to make you think that?"

"You literally implied that Kirby and Adeleine should get married," Master Hand stated matter-of-factly, causing a big rift between him and Pit just for keeping it real. "It's never going to work."

"I know that Isabelle thinks otherwise." Pit looked towards Isabelle for backup, but Isabelle responded by turning her head away. "Well, there's someone out there who wants to see the marriage!"

"Your imaginary friend, perhaps. Have you ever considered the logistics of this...marriage?" Master Hand didn't like using the word "marriage" in this instance - made him feel dirty.

"Figured you would say that." Willing to aid his argument, Pit dug into his pocket and pulled out a piece of paper with a sketch on it. "For I have a sketch of how Kirby can make love with..."

"...we don't want to see that, Pit," Isabelle said to the angel, who moaned in sadness as he put his sketch away. He really wanted to show it. "We're not in the mood for being scarred for life."

"Speak for yourself..." Master Hand muttered under his breath, as Isabelle gave the giant hand a look full of concern and disgust. "...anyway, why don't you spread your delusion somewhere else, Pit?"

"It can't be called delusion if it's bound to become reality one day!" Pit barked at Master Hand with a frown, before storming out of Master Hand's room with a huff. The angel was sure to bring Master Hand on his side sooner than later.

"Joker must let Pit drink a lot of coffee while on the job," Master Hand discussed said to Isabelle after Pit left, his morbid curiosity making him ponder over what Pit's sketch looked like. "Too much caffeine can rot your brain!"


Speaking of Joker, the young man wanted to keep a close eye on Pit so that he wouldn't leave Cafe Leblanc without permission. That was why he invested in buying an ankle collar, which he implied doing in the last episode. Said ankle collar was purchased by Mega Man, who was showing Joker how the device worked in the cafe.

"Setup is easy, just put it around Pit's ankle, and viola," demonstrated Mega Man, as he attached the ankle collar to Joker's wrist. Fitted on like a glove.

"Is that the key you use to take it off?" Joker asked Mega Man, who used a small key to open the ankle collar and take it off of Joker. "May I see it?"

"If you want, then sure." So Mega Man handed Joker the key, expecting the young man not to do anything super crazy while it was in his possession. "But as a warning, whatever you do, do not lose track of..."

"Whoops!" Joker opened the window and tossed the key outside, before closing the window back with a grin on his face. No doubt he did that on purpose.

"...do not lose track of it." Mega Man looked out of the window as if he expected to find the key in the shrubbery that it most likely landed in. "That was the only key that came with the ankle collar."

Joker: Putting an ankle collar on Pit might sound excessive, but it's the only way that I can keep him intact at the cafe. His friends can only do so much to keep him contained. And the more that I think about it, I almost feel like an overbearing parent.

"This remote can be used to turn the alarm on or off," Mega Man continued to explain to Joker as he showed him a remote. He hoped that Joker wouldn't throw that item out the window. "So if Pit has to use the bathroom, just press this button."

"If Pit asks to use the bathroom," Joker affirmed for Mega Man, as he received the ankle collar remote from the Blue Bomber. The other baristas might want to keep a close eye on Joker, in the event he becomes a control freak.

"Any chance you have a second remote?" Viridi asked Mega Man with a smile; the goddess of nature wouldn't let Joker be the only one to have controlled autonomy over Pit. Not over Pit's own girlfriend.

"I'm afraid not - the package didn't come with another remote," replied Mega Man, as Pit returned to the cafe - looking downtrodden and down in the dumps.

"Why do you look so upset, Pit?" Joker asked the angel, recognizing how upset he looked. "Did any one of you tell him?" Joker asked the other baristas.

"Don't look at me, I haven't said a single word to him about it," Kirby expressed his innocence to Joker, as Pit was looking down at the floor heaving a sigh.

"Guys, I have some bad news..." Pit announced to everyone in the cafe, acting as if he was about to announce that his secret pet dog had died or something. "...Master Hand isn't a believer of love."

"Took you long enough to realize," remarked Ganondorf, sitting at the counter with a cup of coffee in hand. "He still thinks that my 'courtship' with Rosalina is a farce."

"I don't get it...why does he not see in Kirby and Adeleine?" Ganondorf, who was taking a sip from his coffee, spat out its contents after hearing what Pit had just said. "They're the perfect couple!"

"More like the imperfect couple..." muttered Samus, who unfortunately had coffee spat in her face as Ganondorf, the main culprit, found himself gagging. The Flying Man ran over to apply the Heimlich maneuver to Ganon.

"Come here, Pit...let's hug it out," Joker offered to the angel, holding his arms out wide for a friendly embrace. The saddened Pit went over to hug Joker, and just when he expected Joker to wrap his arms around him...

"Aha!" Mega Man exclaimed as he attached the ankle collar to Pit's ankle, securing it tightly. Joker put his arms down and backed away from Pit, who saw the ankle collar on his left ankle.

"What the...am I on house arrest?" asked Pit, his unwarranted depression now turning into worry as he saw how tight the ankle collar was. "Knew that time I flashed that old lady and her grandkids would catch up to me!"

"This has nothing to do with you flashing a grandma...and her grandkids," stated Joker, who was also expressing his deepest sympathies for the victims of Pit's heinous act. "The ankle collar is going to keep you at the cafe."

"So no more running out all willy-nilly," Kirby said to Pit, with the added hope that he would no longer be reeled into any of Pit's future shenanigans.

"The only time I'll permit you to leave is when you have to use the bathroom. And even then, I'll send Incineroar out with you so that you'll return in a timely manner."

"But how will I be able to spread the word of Kirby's wedding outside the cafe?" questioned Pit, for his work was far from done. "How will I ever find Kirby's wedding officiant? This is super counter-intuitive, Joker!'

"Not my problem - you bought this upon yourself." Joker grabbed Pit's cafe apron and tossed it to the angel so that he could put it on. "Now get to work."


Falco and Knuckles were both arrested, for different reasons - Falco, for attempting to destroy a kiosk at a Chick-Fil-A restaurant, and Knuckles for trying to smuggle a few X-rated movies from Walmart. Both men initially blamed their crimes on the institutions, rather than themselves.

While Falco and Knuckles had to serve a jail sentence each, both men got out of dodge thanks to Crazy Hand throwing money at the local authorities. Literally, in fact. Now Knuckles was back at the tower, with a few souvenirs for all his troubles.

"Like X-rated movies?" Knuckles asked Lakitu and Hammer Bro, showing off a film that he tried to smuggle out of Walmart. "This is the only one I was able to get away with stealing." The echidna handed the DVD to Lakitu, who was looking at it closely.

"Was stealing this movie worth it?" questioned Lakitu, as he saw that the DVD cover had a few animated characters on the cover. "I mean honestly, who would watch this?"

"But that's an animated film, Lakitu," Hammer Bro said to the bespectacled Koopa, as he wanted to see the movie for himself. "Could it really be that bad?"

"Hammer Bro, there is a literal warning label on this cover?" Lakitu pointed at the warning label in question, and Hammer Bro thought little of it. "Does that not tell you anything?"

"That's probably just a suggestion - just like the street signs on the road. Does anyone ever take them seriously?"

"It would explain why driving has been terrible as of late..." Lakitu was ready to hand the DVD back to Knuckles, as he felt like filth holding it in his hand. "...sorry Knuckles, but we aren't interested."

"The movie has 'special features' in it, if you catch my drift," Knuckles whispered discreetly to Lakitu and Hammer Bro, enticing them as much as possible as he raised his eyebrows up and down. Lakitu was hooked, as he smiled.

"Knuckles the Echidna, you, my friend are a true man of culture." Lakitu kept the DVD kept for himself, holding it very close to his chest as Knuckles was smiling smugly. "Hammer Bro and I will be treating ourselves later tonight."

"Much obliged, good sir!" Hammer Bro offered his thanks to Knuckles, as he and Lakitu took off down the hallway. Knuckles watched as the two Koopas left, still smiling to himself.

"Hehehe...suckers," the echidna said, as he dug into his imaginary pocket and took out another movie...except that one was the real deal. "Sure hope those two love Monsters Inc."

Knuckles: Don't believe what the others told you - I didn't let myself get arrested. I had escaped from Walmart by smacking the manager's face with one of the DVDs, and then ran to the police station and turned myself in like a man. *pauses, then lowers his head* And then I got arrested...

Serena: Even with Crazy Hand bribing the police, Knuckles still had to serve a sentence in jail. But it only lasted for a day, as he got out on "good behavior". Which could be loosely translated as, "We did not want to put up with Knuckles so we released him at our earliest convenience". Doubt that we'll get another "reinvention" from Knuckles from this incident.

Lakitu: That's weird, the DVD cover's peeling off... *rips off the cover, only to reveal something underneath* ...hey, this is a Pixar film! We've been bamboozled!
Hammer Bro: There are still "special features" on the DVD...right?

As Knuckles went to the lobby of the tower, he heard a big commotion coming from downstairs. There was rarely any kind of commotion in the lobby so obviously, something special was going down.

"Wow, Waluigi, look at you go!" shouted Magnus, as the meager thought of Waluigi being remotely good at something prompted Knuckles to pick up the pace. Knuckles soon arrived at the lobby and saw Waluigi doing tricks with a soccer ball.

"He hasn't missed a beat!" exclaimed Mr. Resetti, as he and a handful of other tower denizens were gathered around Waluigi. Waluigi was bouncing the soccer ball with his feet, and occasionally his head.

"See? I told you guys that I have talent and skill!" a largely vindicated Waluigi said to his peers, keeping his eye on the ball as he impressed the crowd. However, not everyone was impressed - Knuckles, for instance, was awfully skeptical.

"Who the heck possessed Waluigi and caused him to do this?" the echidna whispered to Saki Amamiya, unable to recall any other instance where Waluigi exhibited so much coordination.

"Quit being such a hater, man..." Saki frowned at Knuckles, frowning as he distanced himself from the echidna. Waluigi continued to bounce the ball until he accidentally kicked it in Knuckles' direction.

"Oopsie daisy! My bad," Waluigi apologized to Knuckles, who ducked out of harm's way as the soccer ball bounced off the wall and struck Shadow in the back of his head. Shadow took it like a G.

"I'm fine," Shadow assured the others, saving everyone from the unwanted trouble of asking him if he was okay. "I'd probably kill Waluigi if I cared enough."

"You almost decapitated me!" Knuckles growled at Waluigi, who looked apologetic as Serena kindly handed the lanky man his soccer ball. "You think that I would wanna die at the hands of your lame soccer skills?"

"Lame?" Waluigi snorted at Knuckles, as any kind of trash talk directed at him could only make him laugh. "I've got more skill in my pinky than you do in your entire body."

"If our bodies were switched, then sure." A Manaphy from the Pokemon sanctuary would be more than pleased to make that a reality. "Only an idiot would believe that you have skill."

"Those were some pretty nice moves, Waluigi," Cloud complimented the lanky man, standing in the crowd along with Denzel. Knuckles looked toward the swordsman with his mouth agape.

"Aw, thanks Cloud - means a lot coming from you!" Waluigi thanked the swordsman, as Knuckles was led to believe that Waluigi conditioned Cloud to say nice things about him. He held that sentiment for but a few moments.

"Okay...maybe you're a little talented, Waluigi," Knuckles said to the lanky man, as he was left with no other choice but to acknowledge Walugii's soccer skill. Partly thanks to Cloud. "...but the question is, are you talented enough to win a soccer game?"

"What exactly are you implying?" Waluigi folded his arms, curious as to what Knuckles was hinting at. Knuckles walked up to Waluigi, ready to lay out a challenge of somewhat epic proportions.

"You, versus me, in a fou-vs-four soccer match. Not gonna lie, I'm pretty good at soccer myself - so this match will settle the score on who's the real soccer star around here!"

"You're like 0-3 in soccer matches, though," Midna said to Knuckles, as she either spectated any soccer game Knuckles was in or heard about the echidna's shortcomings from the others. "Nobody wants to see you lose again."

"Yes, we have already seen thee get creamed at Lúcioball," stated Shovel Knight, as the mere mention of the Lúcioball game riled up Knuckles. "Thou was even caught cheating!"

"Lúcioball doesn't count! It's nothing more than a lousy gimmick," stated Knuckles, who would want nothing more than to shout his opinions of Lúcioball in Lúcio's face. "It was a gimmick match. My match with Waluigi will be the real deal."

"Who's gonna be on your team, hot shot?" Waluigi asked Knuckles, taunting the echidna with a hand on his hip as the others snickered. Knuckles, now in desperation mode, looked around the lobby for a suitable teammate.

"My teammate...my first teammate will be..." replied Knuckles as he eye around the lobby, before his eyes fell upon a boy who happened to be standing next to Cloud. "...Denzel! Denzel will be on his A-Game.

"Wha...?" uttered Denzel, as Knuckles ran up to the boy and held his hand up high. Denzel looked rightfully confused, while Waluigi was dumbfounded.

"Denzel?! Ooh...I was about to name him to my team," grunted Waluigi as he snapped his fingers in disgust, while Cloud and Denzel exchanged bewildered looks with one another.

Waluigi: Cloud is a highly adept individual, and anyone who has been under his care is likely to be just as skilled - if not more! If the transitive property is to be believed, then Denzel must be skilled beyond great measure. A great asset for any sports team.

"Nice pick - now I'm gonna pick out the rest of my squad," Waluigi said to Knuckles, who could only snort as he already saw his soccer team as superior. "We'll see who's the best, Knuckles!"

"Looking forward to it, I really am," replied Knuckles, as he and Waluigi had a staredown going on. Waluigi would continue staring at Knuckles as he walked away - only to bump into a wall by accident.

"I, uh, meant to do that on purpose." Amid the others laughing at him, Waluigi rubbed his forehead in pain before fully retreating from the lobby. "I'm not hurt enough to play soccer, though!"


Why wasn't Mario with Cloud and Denzel, watching Waluigi showcase his soccer ability? It was because the plumber was in the tower's kitchen, fixing himself a hot dog. However, there was a problem that he encountered...

"Whaddaya mean, you have no mustard-a and ketchup?" Mario got into it with Chef Kawasaki, as he refused to eat his hot dog plain. As an Italian, it was against the rules.

"We're all out of condiments," replied Chef Kawasaki, as a shocked Mario gasped at the chef in disbelief. "Had to use what was left for my sweet potato casserole."

"Cloud, can you believe-a that Chef Kawasaki wasted the ketchup and-a mustard for his casserole?" Mario asked the swordsman, whom he saw entering the kitchen along with Denzel. "How can I eat-a my hot dog now?"

"I'm afraid that we have a bigger problem," answered Cloud, leading Mario to assume that the condiments at his own home were somehow wasted. "Knuckles is apparently having another soccer match..."

"...and he named me to his team," Denzel finished for Cloud, sounding very bothered; Mario knew that Denzel had very little soccer experience, and he knew what to do to rectify the situation.

"Are you thinking what I'm-a thinking?" Mario asked Cloud and Denzel with a big smile, expecting Cloud to get the hint. Cloud was too reluctant to answer.

"For my own sake, I feel inclined not to say," replied Cloud, only for Mario to grab the swordsman's hand and take him out of the kitchen. "Hey, where are you taking me? Hey!"

"Least I can add some sugar to my casserole," remarked Chef Kawasaki, as Denzel left the kitchen. Kawasaki took a peek inside a wooden canister of sugar and was surprised to see what was inside as he took off the lid. "So that's where the remaining ketchup went!"


The ankle collar was working like a charm, as Pit was keeping his butt behind the counter at Cafe Leblanc. Granted, the angel showed no indication of wanting to leave, but he was at least staying put.

"You saw him where? At the park?" Guile spoke into his phone, sitting at the counter as the baristas eavesdropped a little bit. "Okay then, I'll let Link know. Goodbye, Tom Nook."

"So who did Tom Nook see?" Joker asked after Guile had ended the call, hoping that he wasn't being too nosy. Guile looked over and saw the baristas all staring at him.

"Bunch of rubbernecks...if you're dying to know, Toadsworth was spotted at a park downtown." Just hearing Toadsworth's name made Pit awfully overjoyed, much to Kirby's chagrin.

"Kirby's future wedding officiant..." Pit uttered quietly, happy to know that Toadsworth was still in town after he had treated Daisy and Luigi on their wedding anniversary. Kirby, on the other hand, was far from being a happy camper.

"Tom Nook saw him during his afternoon jog. Yet he didn't wave hello to Toadsworth, or call someone to get him a ride! Truly un-American."

Guile: Being the astute American patriot that I am, I find myself heavily impartial towards Toads. They know how to wear the colors of the flag and represent them well. Many of them may not know it, but those Toads are the most patriotic creatures on this earth.

"Ah, Guile! We've found you," said Link, as he and Zelda stopped by at the cafe entrance. They instantly recognized Guile just from seeing his famous haircut. "Wanna go see how Earnest is handling himself?"

"I think you should be more worried about Toadsworth," Guile informed Link and Zelda, knowing that any Toad left behind was nothing to overlook. "Go speak with Tom Nook - he's the one who saw him."

"Well, in that case...maybe we should speak with Tom Nook!" said Zelda, she and Link forced to shift gears for the time being. Earnest could wait until later. "Shall we, Link?"

So Link and Zelda left, as they were now focused on finding Toadsworth and bringing him to the mansion for safety. Pit tried to follow the Hylian couple out of the cafe...only to hear a loud alarm ring from his bottom leg.

"oh wow, that alarm sounds...alarming," quipped Sans, unable to hold in his laughter as Pit saw his ankle collar sounding off. Pit had a foot out the door, which was what triggered the alarm.

"Nice try..." Joker said to Pit, oddly feeling the urge to do a slow clap for the angel. It pleased the young man to know that the ankle collar was working as intended.

"I have to go use the bathroom," Pit said to Joker, as he held his crotch while doing the noteworthy-but-not-yet-patented pee dance. "It's an emergency." Nonetheless, Joker wasn't buying it.

"Don't see any sense of urgency from you, so...get back to work." So Pit heaved a depressed sigh and went behind the counter, as the alarm from the ankle collar finally turned off.


Waluigi wanted his soccer team to be better than Knuckles' team, and so the lanky man went out to find and recruit worthy enough talent to his squad. However, during his search, he was asking the wrong people...

"Silly Waluigi, I can't be on your team!" Peach said to the lanky man, who was speaking with the princess at the front door of Mario's home. "In case you've forgotten, I'm still pregnant."

"Don't act fake for me, princess!" Waluigi pointed at Peach, while he eyed down at the princess's belly a few times. "We all know that you're just putting on extra fat. You're not pregnant - it's all in your head."

"Then how would you explain my pregnancy symptoms?" Peach saw that Waluigi had no explanation to speak of - instead, the princess saw Waluigi go into desperation mode, as he got down on his knees and put his hands together.

"Please, I am asking...no, begging...just join my team, please." Waluigi was trying to shed some tears to bring Peach to his side, and though a tear wasn't shed, Peach was slowly having second doubts.

"Depending on how the match goes, I can take it pretty easy...maybe not run as much." Waluigi was satisfied with those terms, as he smiled at Peach and nodded his head in agreement.

"Peach, is Waluigi bothering you?" Daisy asked the fellow princess as she came up outside, smacking her frying pan in the palm of her hand. "We've gone over this many times, Waluigi - you can't fit in any of Peach's swimsuits!"

"I was just asking Peach if she wanted to join my soccer team," Waluigi explained to Daisy as he stood up quickly to potentially save himself from a beating. "Knuckles is my opponent."

"But Peach is pregnant. Do you want to risk her pregnancy for a meaningless soccer game?" Since he knew that he would be at the receiving end of a frying pan, Waluigi refrained from answering yes.

"Why not - I need all the firepower that I can get! Anything to stop the vaunted duo of Knuckles and Denzel." At this point, Daisy couldn't take Waluigi seriously anymore; she burst out laughing in less than a second.

"The vaunted duo of some kid and a guy who loses routinely at soccer?" Daisy was doubling over as she laughed herself to death, making Waluigi feel bad in the process. "You are such a goof!"

"It's called being one step ahead of the curve, sweetheart." Unable to take any more of Daisy's hating, Waluigi stormed away from Peach. The lanky man would run into Mewtwo, who was trying to keep to himself.

"Let me guess - you're going to ask me if I want to join your soccer team," Mewtwo asked Waluigi, who got excited as he rubbed his hands with excitement. "Fortunately for you, I have made my decision."

"The decision to join my squad?" Quite the opposite in fact, as Mewtwo teleported away in an instant. Waluigi moaned and walked away, his back hunched over as he remained stuck at square one.

Mewtwo: A soccer match between Knuckles and Waluigi...hard for me to make a prediction for that one. I cannot for the very life of me tell you who will be coming out victorious. I see no winners in sight - anyone playing in that game, let alone being merely involved in it, is a loser in my eyes.


To have Denzel fully prepared for the soccer game, Mario brought the boy to his backyard for some soccer practice. Cloud was asked to participate so that he could help with Denzel's "progress". Everything was set up, from the soccer goal to the placement of the soccer ball.

"Why did you have to bring your kid?" Cloud asked Mario, who had brought Jennifer out to the backyard and placed her a couple of feet away from Denzel. "Isn't she a toddler?"

"A toddler no more, she turned four last month!" replied Mario, who threw a wild birthday party for Jennifer. Really wanted to outdo Charles' birthday party. "Which makes-a her a...a, um...a foddler!"

"...yeah, let's just get started before you come up with more suspect terminology." Cloud looked towards Denzel, seeing that he was wearing soccer cleats, and then looked at Jennifer's feet. "Shouldn't your kid be wearing cleats?"

"Shouldn't you stop being so nit-a picky? I only brought my kid because you brought-a your kid. Isn't that right, Jennifer?"

"Yay, soccer!" Jennifer cheered as she clapped her hands, as Mario nodded in approval of his daughter's response. Cloud knew that he couldn't clap back at Mario with his daughter on his side.

"Besides, this soccer practice will allow us to learn-a from each other. Teach-a each other. Inspire each other. Motivate-a each..."

"...I get it, I get," interjected Cloud, who was dying to get the soccer practice over with before Mario drove him insane. "Now can we please get started?"

So Mario whistled into his fingers, and right on cue, a robot hovered down from the sky. Cloud and Denzel looked up and watched in awe as the robot descended into Mario's backyard.

"Denzel, I would-a like for you to meet Fútbot," Mario introduced the robot to Denzel, who along with Cloud was wondering where Fútbot came from. "He will be teaching you how-a to play soccer, not me."

"Who, what, huh...?" questioned Denzel, as Fútbot's arrival left him perplexed and with many questions. At least Fútbot was friendly, for the most part.

"Hello, upstart!" Fútbot greeted Denzel, eager to show the boy the many ways of soccer. "I am an assistant instructor with the Galactic Strikers Federation - or GSF for short. So you're new to soccer, right? I suggest that we kick things off with a little training!"

"Do your best, Denzel," said Cloud as he was about to walk over to the side of the backyard, only for Fútbot to grab him and push him back. "Hey!"

"If we want Denzel to reach his max potential, then we'll need full participation from everyone involved. No spectating allowed!"

Spyro: Mario is apparently doing soccer practice with Denzel, so I'll be sitting here and watching from inside. I'll be counting down the moments until someone accidentally kicks a soccer ball at Jennifer's head.

"First lesson: basic movement and shooting!" exclaimed Fútbot, wanting to start Denzel off with the basics. "Of course, it goes without saying, but practice always makes perfect. Ready to begin?"

"Ready as I'll ever be," replied Denzel as he slowly got himself in the groove. He was hoping that Jennifer wouldn't get in the way too much.

"Good! What I would like you to do is move around a bit. Get those legs moving!" So Denzel ran around the backyard, keeping his energy levels up.

"Hahahaha!" Jennifer giggled as she followed Denzel's lead and started running herself. Denzel was being mindful of the girl, doing his best not to run into her.

"You hurt-a Jennifer, and you're a dead-a man..." Mario threatened Denzel as he shook his fist, electing not to step in and intervene before a nasty accident could happen.

"That's enough," said Fútbot, as Denzel came to an abrupt stop; Jennifer didn't stop running until seconds later. "Now we'll learn about shooting! Move to the ball and give it a good kick."

With his eyes on the ball, Denzel ran up to the ball so that he could kick it with all his might. But as he made the kick, Jennifer would kick the ball away, causing Denzel to land on his butt.

"Look at it go!" squealed Jennifer, watching as the ball she kicked away sailed over the backyard fence. The sound of a window breaking was heard, followed by Marth screaming.

"You have another soccer on you, right?" Fútbot asked Mario, who was more concerned about the earful that Marth was bound to give him.


Earnest was living the high life right now. First, he "won" a lottery ticket that was worth $50,000 - half of it coming from the gas station where the lottery ticket was cashed in. Then he got himself a new home, courtesy of Guile, Link, Zelda, and most importantly Digby of the Happy Home Designers. Earnest was a homeless man no more.

But even with all the perks he had, there was only one thing left that Sonic believed Earnest was missing... a new car. Over the week, Sonic was scoping out a new car for Earnest, with some help from his friends. The blue hedgehog had narrowed down his choices and was ready to make a purchase.

"I'm so proud of you for taking initiative," Lavenza said to Sonic, who along with Tails was browsing at a car dealership. Sonic had to make sure the potential cars he had in mind for Earnest were still available.

"Stop it, Lavenza, you're starting to sound like my mom," Sonic said to the young girl, only for his attention to be drawn to a silver car - the 2020 Jaguar XF, to be exact. "Hey Tails, we should buy Earnest this car!"

"But does he really deserve it?" Tails asked Sonic, a hundred percent certain that the Jaguar XF was out of his and Sonic's price range. The price tag was worth nearly as much as Earnest's lottery ticket.

"C'mon Tails! Earnest just got through being a dirt-poor homeless man. He deserves to be spoiled for all the trouble he's been through!"

"Spoiling a grown man doesn't sound ideal, though..." Tails was forced to keep his mouth shut, as a car salesman came over to speak with him and Sonic.

"Good afternoon gentlemen," the car salesman greeted Sonic and Tails with his usual friendly salesman flair, seeing them standing near the Jaguar XF. "So you got your eye on this car?"

"Wanted to buy it for a friend," replied Sonic, rubbing the hood of the Jaguar XF to get a good feel for the car. "He could really use a new set of wheels."

"Of course, of course! The price is $48,990, but you can make a down payment - at least twenty percent will do."

"Alright Tails, time to pony up!" Sonic grabbed Tails and held him in front of him, expecting the yellow fox to bust out his wallet and hand the car salesman the moolah. But unfortunately for him, Tails no was big money grip.

"Sonic, do you not know how a down payment works?" Tails asked the blue hedgehog, as he simply did not have anywhere close to $9798 to spare. "There's more to buying a car than just..."

"They show those car commercials on television all the time; they make it seem like buying a car is super easy. It's literal car propaganda!" As Sonic ranted, Tails looked away and saw a familiar face at the car dealership.

"If you want, we can do a payment plan," the car salesman offered to Sonic and Tails, slightly oblivious to the light bickering between the two friends.

"Uh, sure, we can do that..." Sonic pushed Tails away from him, and Tails walked off as Sonic as he dug into his imaginary pocket and handed the car salesman his debit card. "...I'm only asking you to not milk my bank account dry."

"But your first payment will be close to ten thousand dollars. So unless you got Elon Musk money, this down payment might bite you in the back..."

"Tails, care to help a brother out?" Sonic looked towards Tails for financial backup, only to notice that Tails was no longer around. "Tails? Where'd you go?"

"Sonic...?" Lavenza said to the blue hedgehog as she pointed; Sonic looked in the direction in which Lavenza pointed...and saw Tails looking at a car, with Coco at his side.

"That rotten little..." Sonic glared at Tails with his hands clenched, dismayed that his friend would drop him for Coco. As Sonic welled up with anger, Crash, Crunch, and Aku approached the hedgehog from behind.

"Found a car yet?" Crunch asked Sonic, who angrily marched away without answering the question. Lavenza ran after Sonic. "We'll take that as a no..."


Mamori was doing a new episode of Microwave Idol Mamorin today, and her guests were Fox and Falco. There was a fear that Falco wouldn't be available, meaning that Fox would have to carry the episode by himself (as Fox had wanted to do). But thanks to Crazy Hand, that fear only lasted for a little while...although Fox was a tad bit salty.

"We are so happy to have Fox and Falco on our show!" gleamed Mamori, as Ashley pressed a button on her remote for some canned cheers. "It should be an episode for the ages."

"So, do you have any idea what we'll be cooking today?" Asuka asked Fox and Falco, wanting the pilots to take their wildest guess. Unless it was something like animal genitalia, which otherwise Mamori would have to do some serious editing later.

"We're making fish sticks," guessed Fox, as the Microwave Idol Mamorin hosts and even Falco gave the pilot weird looks. "What? Is that too basic?"

"Good guess...I suppose, but nope! For today's episode, we'll be cooking chicken steak." Asuka grabbed a plate of chicken steak, holding it up to the camera for the viewers at home to ogle at.

"Nice choice, nice choice indeed," Falco applauded the dish, nodding his head in approval as Asuka pulled the chicken steak away from the camera. "On that note, I have an announcement to make..."

"Does it have to do with the kiosk incident at Chick-Fil-A?" inquired Fox; he had yet to hear Falco own up to his bad behavior ever since he got released from police custody. "Are you finally holding yourself accountable?"

"Not as much. Rather, this has to do with the fact that I had ordered chicken nuggets, despite me being a bird species." Falco was coming off as sincere and frank, and Fox didn't know how to feel about it.

"Is that good or bad?" Mamori asked Falco, who could only scoff at the brunette's ignorance as he shook his head in pity at her. Clearly, this matter was a very serious issue for Falco.

"Bad, obviously! I've let my bird brethren down by attempting to order chicken nuggets from Chick-Fil-A. And for that reason, I have ultimately decided to become...a vegan."

"Say what?" Touma said as he had come down the stairs, passing through the living room when he heard Falco's big announcement. It was a turn of events that nobody saw coming.

Touma: Did Falco imply that he has never eaten at Chick-Fil-A? His life up to that point must've sucked if true. But if he has eaten at Chick-Fil-A before, then why is he acting so profound all of a sudden?

Fox: Yikes! I knew that Falco would've had an epiphany, but I didn't expect him to go to this extreme. On another note, Krystal won't have to worry about Falco bothering us for dinner ever again.

"To Kazooie, Mamahaha, Cloud's pet Chocobo...and the Flying Man, I guess..." said Falco as he faced the camera, holding an apologetic hand over his heart. "...I am sorry for what I have done. Or what I at least tried to do."

"You think that they'll ever see this?" Ashley whispered to Mamori and Asuka, unsure if the individuals Falco mentioned ever watched Microwave Idol Mamorin. Not that the young witch cared as much.

"And because I'm a vegan now, we should save this chicken steak for another episode." Falco grabbed the plate of chicken steak and placed it inside the fridge, without any permission. "Bring on the healthy food!"

"That chicken steak is on the healthy side..." stated Mamori, who was left with no choice but to base today's episode around Falco's new lifestyle. "...but we can cook another dish! A dish that we can all enjoy."

"Screw this, I'm outta here," Fox said to Mamori and company, disgusted with the change of direction as he stormed out of the kitchen. "You can have your vegan fun without me."

"Who's up for some cauliflower salad?" Falco asked the Microwave Idol Mamorin co-hosts, who forced themselves to go along with the new dish. Fox was standing to the side, frowning with his arms folded.


"Let's talk about passing the ball to your teammates," said Fútbot, as he was about to start the second lesson with Denzel. Mario and Cloud had to be willing participants for this one. "Face either one of Mario and Cloud, and pass them the ball."

"Don't be a ball-a hog," Mario advised Denzel, who took the plumber's advice to heart...only less than half of it, that is. Denzel passed the ball to Cloud, as he kicked it to the swordsman.

"Great job! Next, I'll teach you how to do a lob pass, which is a pass that flies in an arc over an opponent's head. Try it now!"

"Give it your best shot," Cloud said to Denzel as he kicked the ball towards him. Denzel saw Mario and did a lob pass to the plumber...as the ball sailed right over Jennifer's head.

"Mama mia..." gasped Mario, who found himself shocked and disappointed with Denzel for reasons unknown. "...you made-a Jennifer your designated opponent?"

"I mean, it wasn't personal," stated Denzel; he couldn't help the fact that Jennifer was in close proximity to Mario while she was looking at a flower. "I have nothing against toddlers."

"Foddler, Jennifer is a foddler," Mario corrected Denzel before sighing deeply, hating the fact that he had to educate the boy. He was going to make the word "foddler" catch on one day.

"Moving on to tackling and dodging!" said Fútbot, anxious to get started with the next lesson. This was a lesson that Cloud was the most afraid about. "Simply put, tackling knocks an opponent down."

"Isn't tackling against the rules, though?" asked Cloud, only to be tackled in his legs by Mario. Mario ran towards Cloud at full force, bringing him down. "Not cool, Mario!"

"That's what happens when you let your guard-a down," replied Mario, as he angered Cloud with how rough he was. He was at least kind enough to help Cloud back to his feet.

"An A for effort, Mario!" Fútbot gave his props to the plumber, now expecting Denzel to follow through with a tackle of his own. "Now Denzel, why don't you take a crack at it?"

"Remember what I told-a you..." Mario was glaring at Denzel, daring him to tackle Jennifer...but since Jennifer was still enchanted with that flower, Denzel opted to tackle Mario instead.

"Here goes nothing," said Denzel, as he ran past Jennifer and tackled Mario to the ground. The form was slightly awkward, but the execution was solid.

"Can he go for the knees-a and tear someone's ACL?" Mario asked Fútbot as he was lying on the ground, as Fútbot shook his head in much disapproval. "We're talking about-a competitive advantage here..."


Dark Pit was in the foyer, cleaning a window with a cloth when he looked out the window and saw someone coming up the porch. The doppelganger opened the front door, just as Flora had entered the foyer, and let a young painter inside.

"Sup Adeleine," greeted Dark Pit, as he granted Adeleine access inside the mansion. Flora had gasped at the sight, with her hands cupped over her mouth.

"Hi Dark Pit," Adeleine returned the favor, as she was holding a large framed painting in her hands. The painting was four times as big as she was, but she was able to manage. "Is Wario home?"

"Yeah, he's home; he rarely leaves unless some food joint in town giving away free food. Which kinda doesn't happen that often."

"I wanted to sell him this." Adeleine would reveal the painting to Dark Pit, and it was a painting of a shirtless Wario surrounded by garlic. Dark Pit did his best to hold his tongue. "He wants to buy it for a thousand dollars."

"Wario is spending money on art?" The thought of Wario voluntarily spending money was foreign to Dark Pit. "What's the catch?"

"There is no catch - Wario just wanted to have this art piece commissioned. Told him that he would have to fork in a lot of money to have it made."

"Guess that means you're gonna be in the art dealing business," laughed Dark Pit, as Adeleine would laugh along with the doppelganger. Flora didn't enjoy the chemistry between Dark Pit and Adeleine, looking at the two through her fingers over her face.

Flora: I know he said that he wasn't seeing Adeleine...but what if Dark Pit was lying to me? He might be telling the truth, but he could've been lying so that I wouldn't get too upset. Felicia says not to worry about it too much, but who is she to speak - she's married!

Dark Pit was about to close the front door, but then he saw Link coming inside. Link entered the mansion along with Zelda, and a friendly guest they happened to locate at a park.

"Much obliged for picking me up, Link and Zelda!" Toadsworth thanked the Hylian couple, as Link closed the door behind him. Happy to be back indoors, Toadsworth did a deep inhale and exhale.

"It's no problem," replied Zelda, happy that gave Guile gave her and Link the tip; Tom Nook could've brought Toadsworth to the mansion himself if he wasn't so worried about getting his jog in.

"I cannot thank you enough for taking me in. Ever since my flight to the Mushroom Kingdom got canceled, I had to look for a temporary place to stay at."

"Your flight got canceled? How come?" asked Link, as Dark Pit and Adeleine were quietly standing off to the side. Flora didn't like how close together the two were standing.

"Haven't got the slightest clue. The airport said that the pilot had a 'tipsy', and didn't elaborate any further. And that was that!"

"Why is his mushroom hat so brown?" Adeleine whispered to Dark Pit concerning Toadsworth, as she was used to Toads having a much more vibrant mushroom top.

"Could be because of old age," Dark Pit whispered back, as Toadsworth heard the doppelganger loudly whispering to Adeleine. "His 'mushroom hat' might be a part of his actual body..."

"Hello, Dark Pit!" Toadsworth greeted the doppelganger, as he raised his cane; the fact that he didn't tip his mushroom hat further solidified Dark Pit's theory. "Mind if I ask who your lady friend is?"

"Lady friend...?" Flora said haughtily, looking down at the floor as Toadsworth's word choice left her with a couple of doubts. No, many doubts.

"Her name's Adeleine, she likes to paint," answered Dark Pit, before watching warily as Toadsworth inched over to Adeleine to take a closer look. "She also likes it when people don't invade her personal space..."

"I really like your mushroom hat," Adeleine said to Toadsworth, who was walking around the young artist as he did his thorough inspection. Eventually, Toadsworth came to a stop as he stood in front of Adeleine.

"Well, it is nice to meet you Adeleine!" the elderly Toad said, as the name Adeleine reminded him of last week's events. "Say, you must be the girl that Pit apparently wants Kirby to get married to."

"...we should get going," said Dark Pit as he took Adeleine's hand and hightailed out of the foyer. He knew from the jump that Pit had corrupted Toadsworth's precious mind.

"We better get going as well," said Zelda, as she and Link led Toadsworth to Master Hand's room - heading in Flora's direction. "Let's go tell Master Hand about your little situation."

"Flora?" uttered Link, who saw the maid in question trying to keep herself concealed. Needless to say, Flora wasn't doing a good job. "Shouldn't you be, I don't know, doing maid work?"

"You are correct...please forgive me!" Flora apologized to Link, bowing respectfully before running down the hallway in a sheepish manner. Link and Zelda exchanged looks, wondering what had gotten into Flora.


Knuckles believed that his soccer team was rock solid with Denzel in the fray, but if he wanted to win he needed some experience. That was why the echidna consulted with Sora, who had previous soccer experience in episodes 210 and 332.

"I know why you want me to join your team," Sora said to Knuckles, as he was in his room playing games on his Gummiphone. "It's because my team almost beat yours when we played Lúcioball!"

"Wasn't a real game..." Knuckles muttered through clenched teeth, willing to die on that hill as many times as he needed to. "...the game we'll be playing today will be a REAL soccer match."

Knuckles: Sora may not be the most graceful athlete (calling him an athlete just feels wrong) but he's still a big get for any soccer team. His ginormous feet are absolutely perfect for kicking.

"Uh oh, looks like someone is making excuses," snarked Riku, chilling as he was leaning against the wall. Knuckles frowned at the silverette after he had gotten under his skin.

"He's too scared to admit that he might lose," grinned Kairi, who was sitting on her bed swinging her legs; Knuckles could only snort at Kairi's assumption.

"Losing is impossible - I've got Denzel on my team," stated a highly confident Knuckles, as Riku and Kairi both failed to see what the big deal was. But Sora, however, was slightly motivated by this bit of news.

"Denzel is playing?" Sora asked Knuckles, who smirked as he nodded his head thinking that he might've had Sora hooked. "Then that must mean Cloud will possibly be in attendance. Gonna show him what I'm made of!"

"That's the spirit!" Knuckles now had Sora on his team, seeing his team being more unstoppable by the minute. But his work wasn't over yet. "Now to find the fourth member..."


"It's time for a lesson on combo play, the Fútbot way!" announced Fútbot, as this was the last lesson that he would teach to Denzel. "I'd like to teach you about the combo pass. This is a move where immediately after receiving the ball, you pass it along to another player."

"Is that why I have the ball?" asked Cloud, who was the designated person to pass Denzel the ball. Had the honors after losing a rock-paper-scissors match with Mario, which he did not want to do.

"That's all it is. When you receive the ball from a teammate, immediately pass it again once it gets there. Now, let's practice!"

So Cloud passed the ball to Denzel, who was about to pass it to Mario. But as soon as he received the ball, Denzel accidentally kicked it at Jennifer, nailing her in the head.

"Mama mia!" screeched Mario, as Jennifer began tearing up before erupting into ears. Peach ran outside, her motherly senses tingling as she saw Jennifer crying her eyes out.

"Oh dear!" the princess exclaimed, as Spyro was heard laughing his butt off from inside Mario's house. Peach ran over to Jennifer and scooped her up.

"He did it," Mario said to Peach as he pointed at Denzel, outing the boy; Peach was not only ticked off with Denzel, but everyone else involved as she was frowning away.

"Soccer practice...is over." Consoling a crying Jennifer, Peach went back inside the house and slammed the screen door shut. The sound of Spyro laughing was now muffled, as an awkward aura found its way into the backyard.

"I think that was a good lesson to conclude with," remarked Fútbot, breaking the awkward silence as Denzel now had both Mario and Peach angry. "Wouldn't you all say so?"

Denzel: Felt really bad about hurting Jennifer, but Mario forgave me and I got over it. On that note, I don't think that Peach will be talking to me anytime soon...

Mario: It was my fault, I shouldn't have brought-a my daughter to soccer practice. I wanted to be a soccer dad with-a Cloud, darn it!

Cloud: Mario referred to me as...a soccer dad? Since when did we start flipping the genders on stereotypes?


Sonic was still at the car dealership, and he refused to leave until he bought the 2020 Jaguar XF for Earnest. The overall price of the car was slightly below $50,000, and Sonic was free to make a down payment on it. Too bad he didn't have enough funds.

"Go ahead and speak with your bank if you must," the car salesman from earlier said to Sonic, sensing how strongly determined the blue hedgehog was to get that Jaguar. "I'll be here waiting!"

"So what's the game plan?" Crunch asked Sonic, as he, Crash, and Aku were a part of Sonic's efforts to buy the car somehow. The four were gathered together, as Lavenza joined in.

"Lavenza! "Why don't you make yourself useful?" Sonic asked the young girl, who was willing to do whatever was asked of her. Provided that it was legal. "Use your cute girl charm to swoon the salesman, so that he'll give us the Jaguar for free."

"That doesn't seem right," responded Lavenza, much preferring Sonic to get the Jaguar the right way. Something that Sonic had very little time for.

"But it will be easy, and effective! We could have Crash fake his own death, but the last attempt didn't turn out so well..."

"I can hear everything you're saying, you know," the car salesman said to Sonic and company, standing by with his classic salesman smile. "None of your guilt trips will work on me! For I have mastered self-control..."

"You're a sociopath, we got it, dude," Crunch said to the car salesman as he gave a thumbs up, shutting him down as he reverted his attention back to Sonic and the others. "We should just give up..."

"If only Coco was here to help us out," said Aku, knowing that the blonde bandicoot would've found a wacky way to finesse the Jaguar without paying a dime. "Too bad she's off flirting with Tails..."

"You guys know about Tails being romantic with Coco?" Sonic asked Aku and the others, who were all perfectly chill with Tails and Coco seeing each other. "And you're...cool with it?"

"Yeah, we were there when they had that picnic," replied Crunch, and Sonic saw that the writing was on the wall as he pulled on his hair. "Tails even bought Coco a gift - a calculator!"

"A calculator?! He couldn't have bought her anything better?" Sonic was becoming frustrated with Tails, as he walked away to wallow in his anger. "Why is my friend such a nerd...?"

"Sonic was never like this when Knuckles fell in love with Rouge, was he?" Aku asked Crash and Crunch, knowing that he was asking the wrong people. Perhaps he should take his question up to Knuckles himself.


Outside the car dealership, Tails and Coco were looking at some of the cars that were out on display. There was a car in particular that Tails took a great liking to, as he brought Coco over.

"This is my dream car - the Bumblebee!" Tails said to Coco as he showed her the Bumblebee car, which just so happened to be yellow. Go figure.

"What a coincidence...that's my dream car, too!" exclaimed Coco, as Tails was pleasantly surprised by this revelation. And also a bit happy. "We sure have a lot of things in common."

"I mean, we are both pretty smart! And we both have blonde hair." Not the best similarity to make, as Tails made a frown. "I mean, you have blonde hair...and I have yellow fur..."

"Eh, it's the same thing to me." Coco shared a laugh with Tails, as Sonic was looking at the two from inside the car dealership with his face and hands pressed against the window. A car salesman eventually told Sonic to move away.

Sonic: Tails hooking up with Coco was something that I once feared would happen...fast forward five years later, and my biggest nightmare is coming true! You don't know how terrible your bad dreams are until you're actually living in them.

"The Ford F-150...a bastion of mechanical beauty," said a certain major, as Tails and Coco saw Guile at the car dealership checking out a truck. "A car befitting for a true American."

"I don't own a Ford truck," stated the man that was accompanying Guile, Jacky Bryant; he much preferred his speedy stock cars. "What does that make me?"

"It means that you have a lot to learn." Guile patted Jacky on his shoulder, confident that the racer would one day wake up and smell the roses. Tails and Coco came over to speak with Guile and Jacky - but mainly Guile.

"Hey, Guile! About to buy yourself a car?" Tails asked the major, as Guile seemed like he was in a prime position to buy the Ford truck. The truck literally had his name on it.

"Heard from Jacky here that Sonic wants to buy a car for Earnest. I wanted to stop by and see how his search was coming along."

"Doesn't seem like it's going very well," observed Jacky, looking inside the car dealership and seeing Sonic at the window tussling with the car salesman that told him to vamoose. Crunch would soon intervene.

"He's trying his hardest," remarked Coco, as Guile was back to staring out the Ford truck. He was looking at the vehicle as if it was his one true love. "Must really like that truck, huh Guile?"

"Pardon me, sir - does this truck come with blue colors?" Guile asked a car salesman who happened to walk by, as he pointed at the Ford truck. He must be super intent on making a purchase.


The episode of Microwave Idol Mamorin starring Fox and Falco was being done without Fox, who had walked out after chicken steak was no longer the dish of the day. Mamori had to shift focus after Falco revealed that he was a vegan, which meant that today's episode would have no meat featured.

"Tell us more about your new vegan lifestyle, Falco!" Mamori said to the avian pilot, who was helping Mamori and her co-hosts put together a cauliflower salad. Fox was watching outside the kitchen in dismay.

"Lot of sacrifices had to be made," replied Falco, delicately adding the lettuce and cooked bacon slices into a bowl. "Not only can I no longer have meat, but I can't eat eggs or drink milk!"

"That sounds horrible!" exclaimed Asuka, who couldn't imagine going a single day without having a bowl of cereal for breakfast. Would be a massive dealbreaker for her. "What kind of food will you be eating from now on, as a vegan?"

"You know, fruit, veggies, pasta, rice...regular everyday food. Ever since I became a vegan, I have become a friend to every animal on this earth!"

"'I have become a friend to every animal on this earth,'" Fox sardonically reiterated what Falco just said, shaking his head as Tsubasa saw the pilot standing outside the kitchen. "What a lie."

"Skipping out on the episode?" Tsubasa asked Fox, before taking a peek at the action going on in the kitchen. She furrowed her brow as she saw what Mamori and company were making. "Are they making...salad?"

"Apparently. It's because Falco's 'vegan' now." Startled by this sudden development, Tsubasa looked at the pilot as if the pilot was trying to fool her.

"Did this have something to do with him trying to buy chicken nuggets?" Tsubasa looked back inside the kitchen and saw how much Falco was enjoying putting together the cauliflower salad.

"I'm afraid so. The dude thought too long and hard about what he had done...and this is the result." The only thing that Fox feared about Falco being a vegan was how overbearing his friend might become.

"Now to add the dressing!" exclaimed Mamori, as she poured some homemade dressing over the salad toppings. Falco was licking his chops, rubbing his hands together as Ashley looked at him like a weirdo.

Asuka: Which do you think is more problematic - Falco being a vegan, or Falco being a vegetarian?
Ashley: Well, vegans are in-your-face know-it-alls while having a giant ego. Whereas vegetarians act like they're on high moral ground - while also having a giant ego. Either way, we still lose.

"Bon Appetit!" exclaimed Falco, giving a chef's kiss as the cauliflower salad was finally complete. Mamori presented the salad to the camera so that the viewers at home could see its green goodness.

"Nice work, ladies!" Mamori commended Asuka and Ashley, with Asuka giving a smile and Ashley dreading Falco's new lifestyle. "And thank you, Falco, for helping us make a cauliflower salad."

"We haven't used the microwave during this entire episode!" Asuka pointed out, as the microwave in the kitchen was left unattended. The biggest rarity that could ever happen on Mamori's show. "That's incredible."

"Yup, we won't be needing this heap of metal anymore..." said Falco, as he unplugged the microwave from the wall. Mamori watched in horror as Falco wrapped the cord around the microwave.

"Um, Falco? We need that microwave for our show," Mamori said to the avian pilot, who was about to leave the house with the microwave. "Our show named Microwave Idol Mamorin."

"Well, as your boss, I demand that we remove this microwave from the kitchen. Microwaves make people fat!" Falco was abusing his power, and Fox couldn't believe the power trip his friend was on.

"That's not entirely true." But Falco didn't care, as he walked out of the kitchen with the microwave in his possession. Fox and Tsubasa both stood there dumbfounded, as neither of them apprehended Falco.

"This isn't cool, Falco!" Fox shouted at his friend, who left the house with the microwave without saying a single word. Mamori watched everything unfold, as she didn't know how to react.

"We'll be back right folks, after this brief intermission," the brunette said to the camera, as the episode had to be put on indefinite hold. "Our guest has completely gone in over his head!"

"Get back here with that microwave!" Asuka shouted at Falco, with Ashley pausing the stream as Mamori and Asuka left to go retrieve the microwave. Ashley chose to stay behind, preserving her energy.

Ashley: Knuckles went to jail and became "Lil Knux"; Falco went to jail for like a day and decided to become a vegan. I don't know which phase is worse. *pauses* I'm hoping that Falco being a vegan is only a phase.


Hopefully, Denzel's soccer training with Fútbot paid off, for it was about time for the soccer game to begin. The soccer field was all set up as the spectators were slowly trickling in. There was even a duo of fowl reporters present as well.

"Good afternoon and a cockle-doodle-doo, soccer fans!" exclaimed Chick Gizzardlips, standing next to Stew as Lakitu was recording the two reporters. "We are coming to you live from the Smash Mansion, in Seattle, Washington."

"I don't know how we keep coming back to these sporting events, but I'm just happy to be here!" added Stew, showing his excitement with the swing of his arm. Couldn't be any happier to call the game with Chick.

"For those of you looking forward to this year's World Cup, we have a special appetizer for you today - Team Knuckles versus Team Waluigi! Believe it or not, there is a lot on the line."

"Knuckles has gone 0-3 in soccer games - losing twice to Mario in 2019 and losing to Lucio earlier this year. Can he secure his first victory against Waluigi and his plucky team?"

"Only time will tell. And speaking of Waluigi, here he comes!" Chick and Stew saw Waluigi arrive with his team, as Lakitu panned the camera towards Team Waluigi. On Waluigi's squad were Geno, Skull Kid...and predictably, Rex.

"Unloved children UNITE!" shouted Waluigi as he held his hand up for a group high five; the lanky man was left hanging, as his teammates were keeping their hands to themselves.

"Under what condition am I considered an 'unloved child?'" Skull Kid whispered to Geno, who was about to ask Skull Kid the very same question. Rex, meanwhile, was tying his soccer shoes.

"Don't laugh too hard," the swordsman said to Nia and Dromarch, whom he saw standing among the crowd. Having his girlfriend in attendance should be a confidence booster. "This is new territory for me..."

"We promise to go easy on you," Nia promised to Rex, as Dromarch had yet to share his Driver's sentiments. Nia looked at Dromarch, expecting the Blade to say something. "Right, Nia?"

"May I jeer at Rex just once?" Dromarch asked Nia, who facepalmed and shook her head at Dromarch for not getting with the program. "Jeering would make the viewing experience more fun."

"And here comes Team Waluigi!" announced Stew, as Team Knuckles was next to arrive. Making up Team Knuckles, aside from the eponymous echidna, were Denzel, Sora, and...Vault Boy?!

"Why is Vault Boy on your team?" Kairi asked Knuckles, who saw nothing wrong with Vault Boy playing soccer. Vault Boy was like a Swiss army knife-type secret weapon, from Knuckles' perspective.

"Asked him if he wanted to be on the squad, and he said yes," explained Knuckles, even though the only response Vault Boy could muster was a smile and a thumbs up. Maybe Vault Boy said actual words since he wasn't on camera.

"Knuckles, why do we have to wear matching uniforms?" Sora asked the echidna, after seeing that Waluigi and his team were in their usual wear. "And why are our uniforms black?"

"Because the color black makes us look hard," Knuckles replied confidently, as Vault Boy held his hand over his mouth so that he could laugh. "Stop laughing, Vault Boy, you know it's true!"

"You're gonna do great out there, Denzel!" Mario cheered the boy on, before nudging Cloud as he wanted the swordsman to offer words of encouragement. "C'mon Cloud, say something."

"Yeah, what Mario said, you're gonna do great," Cloud called out to Denzel, as King K. Rool overheard the swordsman and scoffed at him.

"Quit overhyping Denzel, Cloud, the game hasn't started yet!" K. Rool called out the swordsman, while Mario was let off the hook. "I know that he's your kid and all, but relax."

"I disagree...let Cloud hype Denzel as he pleases," said a certain one-winged angel, as Sephiroth was in attendance for the soccer game. He was smiling at Cloud, who furrowed his brow.

Cloud: Never would've imagined that Denzel would be so "special". I'm willing to bet that some people secretly have him on the same pedestal as a guy like Chuck Norris. Sure enough, we'll be hearing stories about Denzel can slam a revolving door shut, or how he killed ten men with just a single roundhouse kick.
Lloyd: *pokes his head in* Or how his diary is the Guinness World Records Book!
Cloud: Go away, Lloyd, you're gonna make it worse...

Mario: I'm torn. On one hand, I want Knuckles' team to lose, just because-a Knuckles going winless at soccer would be funny. But on the other hand, I want them to win-a so that Cloud can feel proud of Denzel. Is it too late-a to ask for a trade?

"Who do you think-a is going to win, Mewtwo?" Mario asked the genetic Pokemon as the game's referee, Toad, walked unto the field wearing his referee shirt. Mewtwo had no idea what compelled him to be a spectator.

"It will end in a draw or a tie," Mewtwo gave his honest prediction, as Toad placed the soccer ball at midfield while the teams got lined up. "Either or."

"But I didn't ask-a for an educated guess, I wanted an accurate-a assessment. You can look into the future, can-a you not?"

"Are both teams ready?" Toad asked Team Knuckles and Team Waluigi, checking to make sure that he had his whistle around his neck. He'd be in deep trouble if he didn't have it.

"Not yet! We have to do our special haka first," replied Waluigi, getting into position as he stood in the front with his legs bent. Rex and his teammates stared at Waluigi in confusion.

"We never rehearsed this...not that we wanted to," stated Geno, but Waluigi didn't care as he went ahead and did the ceremonial dance by himself. All while shouting totally made-up war cries.

"Some Samoan guy somewhere is probably offended right now," Geno whispered to Skull Kid, as Waluigi performed the haka to the best of his ability. When he saw that his teammates weren't joining in, Waluigi finally stopped.

"Wah! You guys are no fun," Waluigi chided Rex and company, who did not wish to embarrass themselves in front of their many peers. Waluigi had no shame in doing it, though.

"Thank you for that performance, Waluigi..." Toad awkwardly thanked the lanky man, who was very satisfied with how his individual haka turned out as he took a bow. "...now can we start the game?"

"Let's get the show on the road!" exclaimed Knuckles, punching his fist into the palm of his hand. "Gonna show everyone who the real soccer star is."

So the soccer game was underway, with Knuckles and Waluigi standing at midfield, as Toad blew into his whistle. Knuckles was first to maintain possession of the ball, as he kicked it away from Waluigi.

"Go and do your thing, champ!" Knuckles said to Denzel, passing him the ball so that he could show the crowd what he was made of. But as he got the ball, Denzel was swarmed by Geno and Skull Kid.

"Woah!" screamed Denzel as he dodged Geno and Skull Kid, dodging past both opponents. Denzel then ran with the ball to the opposing goal, where Morton was the goalkeeper.

Knuckles: Picked Morton to be my team's goalkeeper, while Waluigi had to go with Roy Koopa. Made him pick the lesser Koopaling. *snorts*
Roy: *leans into the frame, pointing at Knuckles* You also mean the lesser Roy, right?
Knuckles: Sure... *looks away*

Once he got close enough, Denzel kicked the ball towards the net, only for Morton to swat the ball away. That allowed Waluigi to intercept, and run gracefully across the field.

"Haha, suckers!" sneered Waluigi as he maneuvered his way past Knuckles and Vault Boy, before kicking the ball into the goal. Roy Koopa was unable to reach the ball in time, as the ball sailed into the net.

"And Team Waluigi scores first blood!" commentated Chick, as Waluigi celebrated his goal by taking out a rose, putting it in his mouth, and striking a pose. "Hands to yourselves, ladies."

"Eh, it's only the first goal," Mario said to Cloud with a shrug, while Cloud already had his doubts about Team Knuckles winning. "It's no big deal."


Adeleine was ready to sell Wario his artwork, and the transaction was being made at Cafe Leblanc. The artist had worries about Pit, but her concerns were quelled since she had Dark Pit at her side.

"That's right, keep doing your job buddy," Dark Pit said to Pit, who was trying to keep it together as he abstained himself from bothering Adeleine. Wario's painting was sitting on a barstool, as Meta Knight came over and took a gander at it.

"It's not good enough - needs more nudity," Meta Knight offered his critique to Wario, who was sitting next to Adeleine counting up his money. Wario had a lot of Benjamins in his hand.

"Get away from me with your sick mind..." Wario said to Meta Knight, who did as he was told as he walked away. Done counting his money, Wario handed the wads of cash to Adeleine. "...there ya go! A thousand bucks!"

"Thanks, Wario!" thanked Adeleine as she accepted the cash, counting up the money just to make sure that it was legit. "These dollar bills aren't counterfeit, are they?"

"Double-checked five minutes ago. No counterfeits." Wario watched as Adeleine counted the money in her hand, as a tear ran down his face. "Please take good care of my Benjamins..."

Wario: The original asking price for the painting was less than five dollars, but Adeleine kept striking up the price until we settled on a thousand. The transaction would've been easier on me, personally, if Adeleine was gullible.

"Nice doing business with you, Wario!" Adeleine told the fatso, who grabbed his painting and exited the cafe before he could break down in tears. After Wario left, Master Hand appeared in the cafe.

"hey," Sans greeted Master Hand, as he held his hand up - you just know that a hand pun was n the horizon. "care to lend me a hand?"

"Not in the mood, Sans," replied Master Hand, who came to the cafe to scold someone...and that someone was Pit, as Master Hand hovered over him.

"Would you like some coffee?" Pit asked Master Hand, able to sense how angry the giant hand was as he quickly fixed a cup of coffee. "Or how about..."

"ENOUGH!" Master Hand knocked the coffee out of Pit's hand and unto the floor, as whatever chatter was in the cafe came to an abrupt stop. "I think you're in big, big trouble, Pit."

"You think that I'm in big trouble? Or, you know that I'm in big trouble? Because there is a difference." Pit jumped back in fear, as Master Hand had his finger pointed in the angel's face.

"Don't give me any back sass!" Master Hand growled at Pit, before cooling down and backing away from the angel. Pit was left hyperventilating in fear. "So, do you know about Toadsworth?"

"The wedding officiant for Kirby and Adeleine's wedding later this year? Yeah, I know him." As Pit tried to speak stuff into existence, Kirby and Adeleine were both left groaning.

"In your mind, sure...but did you know about Toadsworth being unable to return home?" It appeared that Pit didn't, as he looked concerning about Toadsworth's well-being.

"Nope! This is news to me. Did you come to me looking for a solution?" If Master Hand was looking for a solution, Pit would be the very last person to ask on his list.

"I didn't come to you looking for a solution...I came to ask if you were part of the problem." Now that had Pit scared out of his mind, as the angel was biting his bottom lip.

"Wh-What problem? Like a math problem or something? I can do basic algebra, but anything above that is way out of my league..."

"Just come clean, Pit," encouraged Joker, who could tell by Pit's body language that the angel was hiding plenty of guilt. Even saw some sweat particles on Pit's face.

"No, Joker! You'll never get me to admit to Master Hand that I secretly had Toadsworth's flight back to the Mushroom Kingdom canceled so that I could..."

Pit suddenly stopped speaking, gasping as he realized that he just spilled the beans. The angel covered his mouth, as Viridi and the others looked shocked.

"I'll be dealing with you later..." Master Hand vowed to Pit as he floated away to the Cafe Leblanc entrance before vanishing away. Canceling one's flight was something that Master Hand wasn't going to take lightly.

"No, Master Hand, wait!" shouted Pit as he tried to chase after Master Hand, only for his alarm collar to sound off when he had a foot out of the door. Pit stomped his foot angrily as he returned to the counter.

"That's right, know your place," Joker said to Pit, who had his elbow resting on the counter with his chin in the palm of his hand. Dark Pit, having seen the ankle collar, was nodding his head in approval.

Dark Pit: Joker is a genius for coming up with the idea of putting an ankle collar on Pit. Everyone else is an idiot for not thinking that sooner.


Team Waluigi had extended their lead when Rex scored a goal for his squad. Nia was cheering on for her man, while Dromarch was dying to do the exact opposite.

"May I resort to name-calling just this once, my lady?" Dromarch asked Nia politely, only for Nia to frown and bonk Dromarch on his head. "I won't hurt his feelings too much."

"Over here, over here!" Knuckles called out to Denzel, wanting the ball to be passed to him. Denzel was ready to pass but hesitated as Waluigi came into his rearview.

"I'm comin' to get ya!" Waluigi said to Denzel as he gained speed, sporting a face that was awfully befitting for a crazed sex offender. Denzel began to slow down, as Vault Boy took the ball from him.

"Vault Boy has the ball!" commentated Stew, as Vault Boy ran to the goal with Morton in his sight. The mascot kicked the ball with all his might. "He shoots...and he scores! Team Knuckles is on the board!"

"Woo hoo, let's go!" cheered Knuckles as he raised his fist, before running into Denzel who was standing by. "Make sure you pass the ball next time, aight?"


Meanwhile, in Master Hand's room, Mamori and Asuka had Falco completely cornered. Falco had possession of the idol singers' microwave and was being chased around until he gave it up.

"Keep on trying, ladies, but you'll never get this back," Falco said to Mamori and Asuka, standing on top of Master Hand's bed while holding the microwave. Link, Zelda, and Toadsworth entered Master Hand's room and saw the scene that was unfolding.

"Leave the door open for a hot minute, and stuff like this happens..." groaned Link, seeing that he would have to discipline Falco. Falco was one of the residents that Link personally despised dealing with.

"Link, Zelda - Falco went vegan and won't give our microwave back," Mamori said to the Hylian couple as she pointed at Falco. Link and Zelda were both blindsided by Falco's new vegan lifestyle.

"May I have permission to put this microwave out on the road?" Falco asked Link and Zelda as if he expected both of them to answer yes without question. "I'll do the same with the mansion's microwave later."

"We're not putting any microwave on the road," replied Zelda as she marched over to Falco, hoping that she won't have to get her hands dirty. "Get down, and we won't have any problems."

"Do as she says," Toadsworth encouraged Falco as he stood at Zelda's side, ashamed by the behavior Falco was exhibiting. "Is this how any ordinary vegan would act?"

"Back off grandpa, or I'ma beat your head in..." Falco threatened Toadsworth as he held the microwave above his head...only to hold it back down when Master Hand appeared.

"Falco, why on earth are you standing on my bed?" Master Hand asked the pilot, who saved himself some trouble as he quickly jumped down from the bed. "And what are you doing with that microwave?"

"N-Nothing in particular!" Falco held the microwave behind his back, as Master Hand had the pilot shook. "Thought that it needed to be placed, that's all."

"Falco apparently wanted to put that microwave out on the street," Asuka explained to Master Hand, as Falco tried to get the ninja girl to shush. "That's what he said."

"We can't do our web show without it," added Mamori, as Falco tried to tiptoe away from Master Hand. But Master Hand grabbed Falco and placed him back where he originally was.

"Stealing people's microwaves, aren't we?" Master Hand asked Falco, who knew that he was in for it now. Probably not as much as Pit, though. "What is the endgame here?"

"Uh...I'm a vegan?" Falco answered before turning his head away, thinking that Master Hand would understand where he was coming from. Fat chance.

"You? A vegan?" Master Hand thought for sure that Falco was joking around, as the giant hand was laughing in disbelief. "Did the horrible jail food make you change your ways?"

"No, I just felt bad about ordering chicken nuggets. Well, I would've ordered chicken nuggets if that stupid kiosk was working properly..."

"That's why you damaged that kiosk? Over chicken nuggets? Not a Chick-Fil-A sandwich? Or a strawberry milkshake. Or even just a bag full of waffle fries? A bag of waffle fries is my go-to, by the way. Favorite Chick-Fil-A meal, hands down."

Link: How is a bag of waffle fries a meal... *throws arms up in defeat* ...I give up.

"You know what Falco needs?" Toadsworth asked Master Hand and the others, as he went over to Falco and put his hand on him - making Falco uncomfortable in the process. "What Falco needs is some guidance."

"Go on..." said Mamori, as Falco was slowly having a change of heart. Toadsworth was about to work some of his magic.

"He is new to this vegan thing, yes? He may be misguided, but all he needs is to be shown in the right direction. That's all it takes."

"Right you are, Toadsworth!" Master Hand agreed with the elderly Toad, even if the task sounded hard to him. "The last thing I'd want Falco to do is to flush our hamburgers and hot dogs down the garbage disposal or something."

"That was my next objective, after getting rid of the microwave," Falco sheepishly admitted...and speaking of the microwave, Falco handed it back to Mamori and Asuka. "I believe that this is yours."

"You're giving us back our microwave?" asked Mamori as she accepted the microwave from Falco, surprised that the avian pilot stopped showing resistance.

"Said you couldn't do your show without it, so here ya go. And I was in the wrong for taking it in the first place. Was just trying to send a message."

"Falco just needs a friend or two to show him right from wrong," Toadsworth stressed to Master Hand, making Falco uncomfortable as he put his hand on him a second time. "He can't achieve the vegan lifestyle alone!"

"Maybe you can help out too, Toadsworth, and take the lead," suggested Master Hand, wishing to see the elderly Toad making himself useful. "Being that you'll be stuck in town for a while."

"Yes, sadly...I doubt that the hotel I stayed at will take me back in! But if you let me stay at this mansion for the time being, then I'll be satisfied."

"Well, we better get back to the kitchen," said Asuka, as she and Mamori left Master Hand's room with the microwave. Ashley was probably enjoying being alone in the kitchen. "Wanna finish the episode, Falco?"

"You can go on ahead without me," replied Falco, believing that his actions didn't warrant a return to Microwave Idol Mamorin. "Tell the viewers that I got hit by a truck or something, and couldn't make it."

"Hit by a truck...we'll see," responded Mamori, as she and Asuka left the premises; the chances of the co-hosts telling Falco's "story" were slim to none.

"I have spoken with Pit at Cafe Leblanc," Master Hand said to Link, Zelda, and Toadsworth, addressing the plane situation with the three. "Let's say that he's got quite the record going on..."


Back to the soccer game, and Team Knuckles was still down after Geno scored a goal. The score was now 3-1 in Team Waluigi's favor, and Knuckles had just called a timeout so that his team could regroup.

"If we wanna pull off the comeback, we have to be more aggressive," Knuckles stressed to his teammates in the group huddle, about to give the game plan. "Sora, be a pest. Vault Boy, turn on the jets when you have the ball. And Denzel.."

"Let me guess...you want me to be on my A-game," guessed Denzel, and that was the answer Knuckles wanted as he smiled at the boy.

"There ya go! As long as you're in the zone, we'll be in the zone, too." Knuckles was putting a lot of faith in Denzel...but would it pay off?

Mewtwo: Remarkable...this soccer game has yet to end in a draw! *pauses* But there's an equal chance for it to end in a tie. Won't be making any predictions.

"Here's some of my secret stuff," Waluigi said to his teammates in the group huddle, as he took out a bottle that contained a questionable liquid. The lanky man took off the cap and drank from the bottle.

"Looks like caffeinated urine," commented Geno; once he was finished drinking, Waluigi let out an exhale and wiped his mouth.

"Pass it around and take a sip; it'll give you special powers." Waluigi offered the "secret stuff" to Rex, as only less than half of the bottle's contents remained.

"No thanks...you had your lips on it," Rex kindly responded, holding his hands up; Waluigi then offered his "secret stuff" to Skull Kid, who shook his head.

Play would resume, as Toad blew into his whistle to end the timeout. Knuckles would receive the ball, moving it around until he saw Denzel.

"It's now or never, Denzel - you got-a this!" Mario called out to Denzel, doing his best to motivate the boy. Cloud saw what Mario was doing, and at that moment refused to be outdone by the plumber.

"Don't be a ball hog!" Cloud shouted to Denzel, who received the ball from Knuckles by the time he heard Cloud's message. Taking Cloud's words to heart, Denzel ran down the field until he saw Sora.

"Sora - heads up!" Denzel shouted as he passed the ball to the Keyblade wielder, as Knuckles had the biggest smile on his face. Now having the ball, Sora ducked past Waluigi before kicking the ball into the goal.

"And Sora scores for Team Knuckles!" commentated Chick, as Sora celebrated by shaking his clenched fist. Kairi cheered while Riku smiled in approval. "That cuts Team Waluigi's lead, as the score is now 3-2."

"Way to go, Cloud," Sephiroth said to the swordsman, giving him credit for the advice he gave Denzel as he applauded. Cloud frowned at Sephiroth, before returning his focus to the soccer game.

"Wah, they're gaining on us!" fretted Waluigi, acting as if the world was ending; the lanky man didn't handle adversity very well. "We can't let them get any momentum!"

After Sora scored, it was time for Team Waluigi to take possession of the ball. Waluigi made a pass to Geno...who then got tackled to the ground by Denzel. The crowd reacted in a big way.

"What was that for?" Geno questioned Denzel, taken back by how much force Denzel delivered into that tackle. Denzel was surprised himself! "Isn't that against the rules?"

"That's what happens when you let your guard down," smiled Denzel, as he took the ball from Geno while the Star was still down. Denzel kicked the ball into the opposing net, as Morton was unable to make the save.

"Denzel evens it up at 3-3!" commentated Chick, as the crowd was electric for Denzel. In a way, it made Cloud a bit satisfied. "Team Knuckles is back in the game, folks."

"You saw that, right?" Geno asked Toad, as he and Waluigi were arguing with the referee. "Denzel knocked me down!" Toad didn't seem to care, as he had a smile on his face.

"All's fair in love and war...and soccer!" replied Toad, with Geno grunting and Waluigi tossing his hat to the ground before stomping his feet.


While Sonic was committed to buying a new car for Earnest (specifically a 2020 Jaguar XF), Guile believed that Earnest should pick out what kind of car he wanted. So he and Jacky brought the retired veteran to the car dealership so that he could choose his set of wheels.

"Your friends have picked out a few options for you," a car salesman said to Earnest, as Sonic and company stood around. Two cars were presented to Earnest - the 2020 Jaguar XF, and the Bumblebee.

"Pick this car," Sonic whispered discreetly to Earnest as he pointed this thumb at the Jaguar. "It'll change your life forever...or something close to it."

"It's his decision, Sonic - let him choose," Lavenza said to the blue hedgehog, who kept quiet as he crossed his fingers. Earnest took a gander at the Jaguar, before moving on to the Bumblebee.

"Saw this car in a movie once!" gleamed Earnest as he pointed at the Bumblebee, feeling like a kid again...or at least a younger man. "Best bootlegged movie I had ever seen."

"Cool, so is that the car you would like to purchase?" the car salesman asked Earnest, whose attention was drawn to another car. This time, Earnest gasped with joy as Guile warily looked on.

"Would you look at that!" Earnest ran to the car that made him smile, which was the Ford truck that Guile practically fell in love with. Guile was having mixed feelings right now.

"Is that the vehicle you want?" The car salesman saw that Earnest fell head over heels for the truck, as he had his arms on the hood. "Then it's a match!"

"I've finally found it...my dream car!" Earnest proceeded to kiss the truck, claiming it as his own, as a salty Guile looked on having no choice but to feel happy for the retired veteran.

"He is a true American..." Guile said to Jacky, who was giving the major a judging look. Jacky wouldn't be alone, for Sonic was doing the same thing.

Sonic: I'm sorry, how does buying a truck make you a "true" American? Stupid car propaganda!

"That truck isn't cheap, you know," the car salesman said to Earnest, expecting to blow the retired veteran's socks off with the price. "That Ford F-150 is worth $48,990. You could make a down payment..."

"I'll pay for it out of pocket!" Earnest exclaimed without very little thought, as Sonic and the others gasped in response. "It's okay everyone, I haven't spent a single dime yet!"

"Love the spirit! Just follow me, and we'll get you all set up." So the car salesman led Earnest inside the car dealership, as everyone standing outside was left in awe of Earnest's decision.

"What the heck has that guy done since moving in?!" questioned Crunch; maybe Earnest had taken it way too easy since he was no longer on the streets. "That dude needs a job. J-O-B."

"So I guess finding Earnest a new job is next on the menu," Sonic discussed with Lavenza, knowing that Earnest would be broke once he bought the truck. Would bring him back to square one.

"Should be easy to find him one," surmised Lavenza, only to later express some doubt as she held a finger up her chin. Finding a job for Earnest might be even harder than getting him a car. "Or maybe not...we'll see."

"Ma'am? Ma'am! Do you have another Ford F-150 truck in stock?" Guile asked a car saleswoman who happened to pass by, as he chased after her. "I know you can hear me!"


With the soccer game now tied up, it was anyone's game. Team Knuckles was pulling off a comeback, and Team Waluigi still had a chance to ice the game.

"The first team to score the next goal wins the game," commentated Stew, as both teams were giving everything they got on the soccer field. "Who will come out victorious?"

"No one tries to snatch victory from the jaws of Waluigi!" proclaimed Waluigi, running around with the ball as he confused the spectators with his odd saying.

"The jaws of Waluigi? What..." uttered Olimar, as Waluigi made a lob pass to Skull Kid over Vault Boy's head. That meant Vault Boy was now his mortal enemy.

"Move it or lose it!" Skull Kid shouted at Sora, dodging past the Keyblade wielder as he ran to the goal. The imp was about to get in scoring position...

...only to have the ball stolen away from him by Knuckles. The crowd cheered as Knuckles ran down the other side of the field, with Denzel in his peripheral.

"Alright Denzel, this is all you!" yelled Knuckles, as he moved the ball past midfield. The echidna passed the ball to Denzel, expecting him to make the big play and make the game-winning goal.

But once he got the ball, Denzel instantly passed the ball to Vault Boy, who then kicked the ball towards the net. Knuckles came to a stop, and he, Denzel, and Sora were on edge...as the ball sailed past Morton's head and into the net.

"Vault Boy scores! Team Knuckles has won!" commentated Chick, as Knuckles was cheering and doing a victory lap around the field. Team Waluigi was left to wallow in defeat, with Waluigi the most upset.

"Wah! This wouldn't have happened if Denzel was on my team..." whined Waluigi, already making excuses as he fell down to his knees and banged his fists on the ground.

"He did it, the combo play worked!" exclaimed Mario, so excited that he just couldn't hide it. In his excitement, he gave Cloud an unwarranted hug. "It worked to perfection!"

"I saw it too, Mario," replied Cloud, as he gently pushed Mario away from him. The swordsman then saw Sephiroth staring at him, smiling unnervingly.

"Congratulations, Cloud..." congratulated Sephiroth, although Cloud didn't want any of the one-winged angel's good wishes. Didn't want a good moment ruined.

Mewtwo: The game didn't end with a draw or tie, so my "prediction" fell flat. But to tell you the honest truth...I suspected that Team Knuckles would win. Only because of fate.

"And with that, ladies and gentlemen, Knuckles has finally won a soccer game," stated Chick, realizing a few seconds later how sad that fact was. "Time to pop the bubbly...or the Gatorade showers."

"Finally did it, baby! Yahoo!" cheered Knuckles, who was doing most of his celebrating with Denzel. Sora and Vault Boy were sadly left out. "All thanks to you, Denzel. Knew you wouldn't let me down!"

"What's with all of this commotion?" wondered Toadsworth as he wandered outside, only to bump into a familiar face in Mario. "Why, hello Mario!"

"Hey, Toadsworth! Nice seeing you again," greeted Mario, who along with Peach got to catch up with Toadsworth last week after Luigi and Daisy had their anniversary dinner. Happened when the cameras weren't running.

"Weren't you supposed to be back in the Mushroom Kingdom?" Cappy asked Toadsworth, having no qualms with seeing the elderly Toad for a second consecutive Friday. "Guess you wanted to stick around for another week!"

"It was sadly unintentional..." sighed Toadsworth, looking down at the ground as he shook his head. "...my flight got canceled thanks to Pit, so I'll be staying put until the airport gets a hold of my pilot."

"Sorry to hear that, Toadsworth," Mario sympathized with the elderly Toad, wondering how Pit even got a hold of whoever was piloting Toadsworth's plane. "Pit's, um...a huge-a troublemaker."

"Yes, I am aware. I have learned first-hand, in fact! But Link and Zelda have allowed me to stay at his abode temporarily, so I'll have to make the most of my allotted time here."

"Celebratory meal, let's go!" exclaimed Knuckles as he placed his hands on Mario, wishing to cap off his first soccer victory with some delicious grub. "There's gonna be a celebratory meal, right?"


The celebratory meal would be organized by Peach, as Team Knuckles was invited over to Mario's home. Also invited were Sora's friends, as well as Cloud and Toadsworth. And even Chick, Stew, and Lakitu.

"That woman is serving us chicken?!" frowned Stew as he and Chick were looking at their plates, which had chicken bites as one of the portions. "But we're chickens! This ain't right."

"Better not eat that chicken - it might make you become vegan!" Toadsworth quipped at Chick and Stew, who took Toadsworth's advice to heart as they handed their chicken portions to Lakitu.

"We may never know what X-rated movie Knuckles stole from Walmart," Lakitu spoke with Spyro and Hunter, grabbing one of the chicken bites that was thrown onto his plate and eating it. "Might be for the best if we didn't know..."

"Come on Vault Boy, say something!" Kairi said to the mascot, anxious to hear him speak for the first time. But Vault Boy wouldn't say a word, as he kept on eating away. "A single word will do..."

"Gotta hand it to you, Denzel, you did great out there," commended Cloud, pleased that Denzel played decent enough and didn't embarrass himself. "Made the 'training' with Fútbot worth it..."

"I just wanted to help-a each other out," Mario explained to Cloud, as he was nearly done with his meal. The greedy pig he was. "I got to train-a Denzel - and you got to motivate-a him! Worked out in the end."

"Honestly, I didn't expect you to do that well," Knuckles admitted to Denzel, now more lowkey about his first soccer victory than he was before. "I only picked you as a gut reaction."

"Then I'm glad that I was able to hold up my end of the bargain," replied Denzel, before looking at Cloud as he cracked a smile at the swordsman. "I know that you're happy, Cloud."

"As I said, you did great...and I don't want you to forget that," Cloud said to Denzel, as he placed his hand on the boy's shoulder. Mario was watching this whole moment with a smile.

"Why are you smiling like that, Mario?" asked Toadsworth, who found the manner in which Mario was smiling to be uncanny. "Is the food that good?"

"He's probably thinking about his own kid being great at soccer," joked Riku, and soon enough Mario broke out of his entrance. He saw everyone staring at him, and had to save face.

"Nature calls!" bellowed Mario, running out of his seat and to the bathroom. Seeing the manner in which Mario was smiling, Spyro took a peek at the chair Mario was sitting in.

"Phew...no pee stain," the purple dragon sighed in relief, as he pulled his head back and went back to eating his food. "Hope he realizes that's my chair he's sitting in."

Mario: Ah, safe-a in the bathroom...now that I'm alone, I just wanna say that I'm happy about-a Denzel. And I'm also happy that Knuckles finally won-a at something. Even if it was against-a Waluigi. But hey, a win is a win...