So, after some thinking and discussion with Arawn D Draven, I actually went back to Another Fine Mess..., and began revising it. I decided to remove the 'Drunk Recruit' challenge angle, and change who Harry's relative was from Shino to Mari. This actually feels better, and this time, I decided to write a variation on the Ginza battle for a change. I also wanted to try and develop Shino and Mari more, as Shino, a pivotal character, didn't get as much characterisation in the original version, in the first five or so chapters I managed to write.
For those interested in the pairing, it will be Harry/Shino/Tuka/Yao, for now. I was surprised at the amount of people who wanted Harry paired with Tuka when I posted the original version here, and I had admittedly been reluctant, given her canon sexuality. But given that she actually is attracted to Itami in canon, I decided to fudge that a bit for this story and have her being bisexual, but preferring women in general. And being part of a harem will make her happy if the other women in the harem are willing, but we'll burn that bridge when we come to it.
I'm currently 6 chapters into Worlds Apart, for those of you wanting to see that become a full fic. Once I have seven or eight chapters done, then that will get published. Hopefully, the same will go for this fic, and hopefully Prodigal Daughter.
Anyway, hope you enjoy...
ANOTHER FINE MESS (REVISED)...
CHAPTER 1:
HERE WE GO AGAIN
"You're setting me up on a blind date? What the hell, Mari?"
Sergeant Mari Kurokawa, member of the Japanese Self-Defence Forces and trained battlefield medic, smirked a little. The tall, blue-eyed woman was one of Sergeant Shino Kuribayashi's few friends, in or out of the JSDF, but the buxom hotblooded sergeant was wondering whether she should revise that opinion. "It's not a miai(1), Shino. I'm not expecting you two to get married. He's just new to Japan, and he's a bit lonely, and I thought at the very least you two could become friends. I don't care if those idiots call you a Christmas Cake(2). And if it's any consolation, he had the same reaction."
"It isn't, and stop smirking like that! At least tell me he's cute and not some idiot who faps to H-Games and thinks that's what romance is. I don't need a moron staring at my breasts all the time and hoping to have a grope."
"I daresay he is cute, and while I can't speak for his sex life, I'm pretty sure he hasn't played an H-Game in his life. He's actually my second cousin, from Britain."
This got Shino's attention. "Oh? I didn't know you had family there."
"My grandmother was English, and came here to work for a business here after the Second World War. Her brother stayed in England, and while he's been dead since the Eighties, his grandson is still alive. Nearly wasn't, though. He got orphaned by a terrorist targeting his family back in '91, and said terrorist emerged from hiding back in 2005. Some of those attacks in Britain that happened between 2005 and 2008 weren't Al Qaeda or other groups, but they were led by this guy. It's all pretty hush hush for various reasons, but my cousin managed to kill said terrorist in self-defence. However, he wanted to get away from Britain for a while. Too many bad memories."
"So, he actually fought that terrorist?"
"A couple of times, and survived each time, even if it was by the skin of his teeth. So he knows what it's like to be in a fight, probably more than many of the people we have here in the Jietai. Plus, if you decide to hook up, I know for a fact that he's a good house husband. Those bastards he was left with, his aunt, her husband and his cousin, basically made him their live-in servant for most of his life. Hell, they had him sleeping in a damned boot cupboard until he was eleven."
Shino felt a surge of anger at that. "Please tell me they got their comeuppance."
"The aunt did. She's in jail. The cousin's turned his life around and is actually in the British Army. The uncle died of a heart attack last year when he got tasered while resisting arrest, apparently. Serves him right, really. Anyway, he started looking into his family, and somehow found out about me. He managed to send me an email a few months ago, and we got into correspondence. Then, not so long ago, he decides to come over to Japan. We've spent the last little while catching up. Anyway, I even made suggestions about where you should go. I know you like the shooter games and the laser tag at Joypolis in Odaiba(3), and after that, I suggested Ginza, to do some shopping. Maybe you could show him that doujinshi convention that's on."
"Really?" Shino asked, her face scrunching up in disgust. "It's gonna be filled with otakus and weirdos. Actually, I heard one of the reservists going on about it."
"Oh, I know who you mean. 2nd Lieutenant Itami," Mari said. "It's either that, or Sergeant Kurata, but Itami's the one who really geeks out more than anyone else I know."
"…Tall guy, often has stubble on his chin, keeps singing the Mei-Com song?"
"Yeah, that's Itami. He's a little annoying, and a bit too much of a slacker, but his heart's in the right place. Just needs a bit of tough love every now and then to remind him how he should act. Anyway, it was a suggestion, as he was curious about our culture. He likes some manga and anime, though he's not quite an otaku, by Japanese standards anyway. Western standards, maybe, but he was a bit of a late bloomer in that regard. He'll probably let you take the lead. I wouldn't call him an old-fashioned gentleman, but he'll be courteous to you, and won't mind you swearing like a sailor, as long as it isn't at him."
"Really? Well, maybe it might be a good day. So, what's your English cousin's name?"
"Harry Potter…"
Shino laughed as she fired at Harry with the laser gun. As much as she liked sitting ducks, she wanted a challenge, and while he didn't move like a professional soldier, she had to admit, the scrawny beanpole of a Brit had good reflexes and stealth ability. Then again, if you were being hunted by a terrorist, she supposed you had to get good, or die. Laser tag was fun against unskilled noobs who thought that playing a Metal Gear Solid game prepared them for combat and stealth, but it was even more fun against a fairly skilled opponent, even if he wasn't a trained soldier.
Most of the men who expressed an interest in her didn't like her combative personality. She suspected many of them wanted a yamato nadeshiko, a traditional Japanese housewife, or else some oversexed bimbo like something out of an H-Game. They'd probably prefer her younger sister, and Shino knew that Nanami had had to deal with sexual harassment at the TV station she worked in.
Harry seemed to take it in his stride, and that actually reassured her. She could tell he was physically attracted to her, as he did have a bit of a hard time looking her in the eyes. But he also made more of an effort to treat her like she was a person, and he seemed to speak to her more easily than most. She was certainly grateful for the English she learned while doing joint exercises with the Yanks. She could hold a conversation fairly well.
They were spending the morning here at Joypolis. Then, later this morning, they'd head to Ginza for shopping and lunch. He was curious about the convention, but promised Shino they wouldn't linger if she felt uncomfortable, for which she was grateful.
She peered out from behind cover, trying to figure out where Harry was…only to suddenly hear a blast from behind, and her vest beep. "Aw, goddammit!" she snarled. "How the hell did you sneak up on me? Who do you think you are, Solid Snake?"
"I'm not wearing a cardboard box and I don't smoke," Harry snarked as she turned to face him. He was rather scrawny, and short for his age, but he also looked fit enough. Emerald eyes looked at her through glasses, both weary and yet with good humour, unlike the sardonic look of that ass 1st Lieutenant Yanagida's eyes, or the perpetually belligerent and bellicose look of that even bigger ass Major Higaki. He had a messy thatch of black hair, with a lightning bolt-like scar marring his forehead. He was actually quite handsome, she had to admit, though.
"And thank God for that," Shino said. "Some idiots smoke like bloody chimneys, even in the JSDF. And the less said about people goofing off and using cardboard boxes in stealth training, the better. Still, at least you gave me a challenge. Nice. I'll have to get better in future, I'm sure. If you could get the drop on me, so could someone else."
Harry looked around the darkened room, with the heavy bass music playing through speakers. "It's not ideal conditions."
"Is war ever in ideal conditions?"
"Fair enough. Though will Japan see war in your lifetime?"
"Hope not. But you never know. Anyway, I'm over this. Let's finish up, and then head to Ginza. Maybe there's something interesting happening there…"
Not long afterwards, when they got to Ginza, Shino was eating her words. They had been wandering the district when they saw something at a traffic intersection. Something very large, very odd, and very out of place. "Shino…is there meant to be a transparent Greco-Roman archway in the middle of the road?"
She looked at Harry incredulously. "Why the hell would you think there is meant to be one in the first place?"
He shrugged. "Japan…maybe someone's doing a TV or movie shoot…but there's no cameras, no barricades…Shino, it's becoming more solid. No…no, no, no…who's doing this?"
Shino realised, to her astonishment, his reaction wasn't filled with as much surprise or denial as she would have expected with something as impossible, not like the onlookers who were gawking at the now almost solid gateway. Oh, there was surprise there, and astonishment…but worryingly, there was a fear there. As if he had some small inkling of what was to happen next. "Shino," he said quietly. "I think we need to clear the area, just in case. I think something bad is going to happen."
"Why do you say that?" Shino asked.
"With my luck, it's a dead certainty. Can you get the police to do that?"
"I'll try." There was a police officer nearby, and Shino said, "Hey, my friend here thinks something bad is gonna happen. Can you get the people away from here, just in case?"
The police officer looked at her, before saying, "You sure about that? There's a doujinshi convention nearby, maybe this is a promo for…oh." Whatever he saw prompted him to start yelling, "Clear the area! Clear the area now!"
Shino spotted it along with Harry when the policeman reacted. A dark shape rushing down the tunnel at speed, above the ground, and suddenly shooting out with a shrill roar. "Is that…a dragon?!" Shino yelped.
"Someone's riding it!" Harry yelled. More of them flew into the skies. He then turned back to the gate, and paled. "Shino…"
The urgency in his voice got her to look, and she saw, to her utter astonishment, an army there. What looked like Roman soldiers on foot and on horseback, massive hulking beasts with clubs, smaller creatures with porcine features, and more. It was an impossible army, and yet, it was right there. One even blew a horn.
"…No way in hell those are cosplayers," Shino muttered flatly. "They look too vicious…COVER!"
She pulled Harry behind a telephone booth, but the police officer, along with one of his colleagues and a number of civilians, were hit by a hail of arrows. "Definitely not cosplayers," Shino growled angrily, before checking the police officer (who had an arrow through the eye), before taking his pistol with a murmured apology. She then rushed over to the other police officer, who was also dead, and took the pistol, handing it to Harry. "Don't shoot at anything that you don't want to kill," she said firmly, before she took aim at the approaching army, and fired.
She had to admit, she was proud of the shot that blew out the eye of one of those hulking creatures wielding clubs. Then again, would she have managed to hit anything vital if she aimed anywhere else? For all she knew, they had skulls as thick as tank armour, and their organs were in a different position. Harry didn't hesitate for long, shooting one Roman off his horse, and he seemed surprisingly accurate for a civilian, though he flinched every time the gun went off. Did he play a lot of video games or something? Or did this have something to do with the terrorist who had been after him? However, he didn't make his shots count as much, and he had soon emptied the clip. With a frustrated look, he muttered something as he wound up, and then threw the gun at the approaching army.
Shino almost chewed him out for this, only to see the gun seemingly be thrown at a ridiculously high speed. High enough, in fact, that it hit one of the approaching soldiers in the eye, sending him down to the ground with a scream of pain and causing a bit of a domino effect, causing part of the army to stumble and falter briefly. It was like a baseball had been thrown at them, albeit by one of those baseball pitching guns. Shino decided to just keep shooting, taking down more of those hulking beasts, before she looked at her gun and snarled. "Dammit, I'm out! Run!"
What she wouldn't give for an assault rifle, especially with a bayonet. She was great at jukendo, bayonet fighting, and she reckoned she'd be able to use it to get the hell out of here, with Harry. Never mind a Howa assault rifle: let's see how these bastards would enjoy a meal of hot lead. But no, here she was in mufti, without any useful weapons. If one of the soldiers got close, she reckoned she could use CQC or something, but she wasn't sure how she'd do against one of those creatures without a decent weapon.
As they ran, she noticed Harry looking around. Most of the people had fled. There were a few people in the distance, but they were all running for their lives. Then, he seemed to mutter, "People are dying. Fuck the statue." No, he said, "Fuck the statute," she realised. He then turned around, pulling out a long, elongated carved stick, like a conductor's baton, or a wand. Then, he bellowed, "BOMBARDA MAXIMA!"
A jet of light spat from the wand, and smashed into the invading army. It was as if someone had thrown a grenade into their midst, or they had stepped on a landmine. A massive explosion engulfed part of the invading force. More jets of light detonated amongst them, sending soldiers, horseriders, orcs, ogres, whatever the hell they were flying. At this point, the army halted, hesitating, and Harry began running again, Shino soon following.
"I don't know how many of them there are," Harry panted, "and I'm probably going to exhaust myself if I keep this up for much longer!"
"What do you mean, exhaust yourself?!" Shino demanded. "What the hell was all that you were doing with that stick?!"
"Short version is, I'm a wizard! I think the long version can wait until this shit has died down, don't you think?"
Shino couldn't help but agree with that sentiment. Still, she knew she was going to get the full story out of him and Mari, one way or another. Then again, this day was already strange enough…
CHAPTER 1 ANNOTATIONS:
So, here we are, with Shino and Harry getting caught up in Ginza. Oh dear.
1. A miai is a sort of matchmaking process in Japan. I only know this because it was a link on the Wiktionary page for a blind date.
2. 'Christmas Cake' is an infamous Japanese pejorative term for women over 25, deriving from the fact that nobody wants Christmas Cake past the 25th of December. Apparently 'New Year Noodles' has become more popular lately, but with similar connotations, only with over-31s being insulted.
3. Joypolis is a real amusement arcade in Japan, owned by Sega I believe. I don't know whether they actually have a laser tag centre, but for the sake of this story, it does.
