There was a certain towering building in New York named Stark Tower, rising above even the Empire State Building. It smelled of compressed banknotes and Filthy Rich and so it attracted Loki, the god of mischief, with an allure that only he could understand.
He couldn't resist. Such towers held secrets that just begged to be exposed and exploited. He could not turn back once he had glimpsed it again. It was like putting a slab of bloody meat into the cage of a hungry lion and expecting it to leave it alone. It couldn't.
Loki teleported inside with a grin, onto one of comfortable chairs standing by the bar in the corner. The wine and whisky was expensive, oh, very much so. He raised his eyebrows as he plucked a bottle of Pinot Noir from the shelf, then uncorked it and brought it up to his nose.
Even his turning stomach couldn't have stopped him from tasting it, for wine was something he had grown to love and its potential to cause fiascos always fascinated him. He made a noise of satisfaction as he swallowed, then leaned back in the chair and began to spin around, fixing his mind absentmindedly on the ceiling.
All would have gone wonderfully to plan if he had not chosen this particular tower at this particular time, for he was about to get the shock of his life.
Someone cleared their throat, causing Loki to spin gaily to a stop, then freeze and drop the glass of wine. It shattered on the floor.
"So this is what you're up to now, brother."
Thor rose from a chair in the corner. He was wearing mortal clothes, sized, approximately, 6XL - a red hoodie and jogging bottoms, precisely. If Loki wasn't in the process of recollecting himself, he would have said that his adoptive brother had as much fashion sense as a bin bag.
Thor's eyes gleamed blue in the dim light, the god of thunder that he was, and his blonde hair was loose and dishevelled as ever. He folded his arms, material stretching taught over his muscles.
"I never would have thought."
Loki rose from the chair and looked him up and down with particular distaste.
"What on earth are you doing here?"
"I could ask you the same question."
Loki raised one finger in a trembling move.
"Do not play with me, Thor. Not unless you want me to pin you to the ceiling."
Thor laughed, his voice rolling round the room, his teeth gleaming brilliantly.
"You'll have some trouble with that, Loki Odinson. The ceiling could come off, and Mr. Stark wouldn't be too happy about that."
Loki sneered.
"I don't remember giving you the right to say my name."
"I don't remember Father giving you the right to leave Asgard."
"That's not surprising, given your ever-oblivious state." He forced a grin with some effort. "After all, we both know who the more intelligent… family member… was."
Thor grew solemn and looked him up and down.
"Don't bite, brother. I don't intend to fight with you at this moment in time." He nodded, as though confirming a thought. "You've changed. Not for the better."
Trust him to be so tactful.
"And you've stayed as thick-skulled as ever. Not for the better either."
"Your tongue is as agile as always. Good to see those years in prison did not affect you."
Loki really did wish to pin him to the ceiling. Above a pool packed with piranha fish. His fingers started to itch.
"Watch your tongue, Thor…"
"Then why are you still here?" He challenged. "I would go if my presence was bothering you so much. I'd do it before Stark comes back in here."
"Hah!" He sat onto the stool with a flash, holding the glass of wine nimbly. "So many years…"
He took a few sips of the Pinot Noir.
"And you still haven't learned to observe. I do what I want. Go wherever I want to. Right now, I want to be here."
Thor shrugged, rolling his right shoulder.
"That's too bad. In this town, you are considered dangerous and wanted. And since I have just sworn to protect it-"
"-you did what, you numb-skulled pamby? Are you out of your mind?"
"Not as much as you are." Thor chuckled. "It's now my duty to make sure you at least leave this town and don't come back. Whether that's in one piece or in five… that's up to you."
Loki spat out the wine he had just taken a sip of, trembling with laughter. Thor pulled out his hammer, his eyes lighting up and held it like it was a plastic toy, not the five-hundred-pound killing machine he had nearly packed into him a few years ago. Loki wedged his bottom lip between his teeth in an attempt to quieten down, his own eyes turning black as his hair.
"I'll leave you to explain to Mr. Stark why the top of his tower is currently smithereens somewhere below it in the streets, then. Toodle-oo."
Anybody watching the tower would have ducked and ran, for the top floor suddenly exploded in green and electric blue, causing it to groan and wobble about its foundation. Bricks and debris rained on cars and lorries, setting off hundreds of alarm sirens, which added to the choir of terrified screams and the shuffling of feet as the area was evacuated and the avengers called.
Hattie had to keep the TV on all the time, now, in case there was a very important headline that could have something to do with the god of mischief getting a little hot-headed or bored. Nothing was on until it grew dark, and she even dared to hope that he had taken advice into consideration and didn't recklessly set a forest on fire today.
No such luck.
"Really?" She hissed, putting her hands on her hip as Loki the cat jumped onto the table. "Stark tower? You've got to be kidding me."
"-the tower did not collapse completely, a lot of damage has been done to the surrounding area. Thankfully, there have been no casualties this time, with only Mr. Stark himself coming out of the mess with a broken arm. Although nobody can be sure of the reason of this attack, we can determine that-"
She switched off the TV just as there was a bang and a fuming figure of Loki the Lie-smith emerged from the porch, looking as though he wished to burn everything before him.
"Do not… talk… to me." He said, raising a hand. "I'm too sober for this. I need a drink. No. I need a lot of drinks. A real lot. Drunk." He muttered, sweeping off to the kitchen. "I need to get drunk."
Henrietta raised her eyebrows in anticipation, biting her cheek to suppress a giggle - then heard it.
"Are you serious?!" There was a smashing sound. "You don't have a single drop of drinkable alcohol in this house?"
She came into the kitchen with Loki the cat in her arms. He whipped around and glared at her, a tinge of red in his eyes, his feet crunching over a cup he had swept off the counter.
"Are you a Teetotaler? No, you don't have to answer me." He mocked. "Of course you are, you responsible, rational schoolgirl."
It was amazing how he was able to make this description sound like an insult. Loki the cat struggled out of Henrietta's arms and left with a nervous meow. Henrietta, though, could barely keep herself from laughing.
"Why did you destroy the Stark tower?"
"I didn't destroy it." He said, diving into one of the cupboards, then emerging with a hiss. "I didn't poke my nose into my own business. I didn't think it was a good idea to join the accursed superhero club!"
"Then what was it this time?"
"Ah, stop asking questions."
He rose, disappeared, reappeared with a flash clutching about three bottles of wine in both hands, then marched off towards the living room.
"Foolish braggart. Damned pork-brain." He muttered as he did so, conjuring a glass with an irritated flick of his wrist. "Lumbering oaf. This is what happens when you have too much freedom and too little pain in your life. Superhero indeed."
"Who was it?"
When she didn't get an answer, she sat down across the table and observed him with wide eyes as he emptied glass after glass of potent alcoholic beverage.
"I don't understand why that's an occasion to get completely wasted." She said, when he reached for his fourth.
Loki clenched his jaw and dragged his hand down his face, massaging his temples.
"You don't understand a lot of things, Henrietta. Let's just leave it at that." He said into the glass, then his eyes narrowed. "What I don't understand is why you don't drink. Look at this!"
He stabbed the wineglass at her, looking surprised when the liquid sloshed out of it onto the floor, but wasn't put off track.
"Look at it!"
"What am I meant to be seeing?"
He turned into young Hattie again, looking very strange as a five-year-old under the influence of alcohol.
"What am I meant to be seeing? Loki of Asgard, why do you breathe? Why do you blink?"
He turned back and glared at her, pouring more wine into the glass in a violent temper, then gave a strange whimper and collapsed back in the chair, looking very sorry for himself.
"Why do I blink? Why do I breathe?" He wailed, shaking his glass at the ceiling and sloshing more over himself. "Why can't I just perish?"
Henrietta didn't know what to say. Loki Laufeyson emptied the glass, sighing.
"Henrietta, do you think I'm the worse sibling?"
She had no idea what he was talking about, but she decided to play along since asking questions seemed to only work him up.
"No."
"No?" He furrowed his eyebrows. "Are you certain? You do read minds. Tell me. What is Odin thinking right now?"
He seemed to be speaking in riddles. Henrietta made to reach for his glass, but he removed it sharply from her reach, shooting daggers at her, spilling more.
"Never mind. You know what? Why don't you do me a favour and just stab me with that sword in your uncle's chest of drawers. It would save me so much trouble. No, it wouldn't."
He laughed emptily, taking another pull at the glass.
"Death won't hear me. I'll just be in more pain. More pain."
At this, Henrietta got up silently and made her way into the kitchens. She reached up into one of the cupboards and pulled out a sachet of powder, humming to herself. She ripped off the top, then hid it in her apron and came back into the room.
He was spinning around in the chair, although he was turning green by doing so. She stopped him and he moaned.
"You cannot stop fate, Henrietta." He mumbled, rubbing at his stomach. "I am destined for two things - suffering and-"
He broke off, retching, squeezing his eyes shut tightly.
"-and I am destined to puke."
"I think you are destined to stop drinking." She said firmly, taking his glass from him and putting it on the table. "Why don't you go and rest? We can talk about this tomorrow morning."
"No. None can command Loki Laufeyson, the Silver-Tongued, the cruel. Not even you, little Henrietta. And I will not stop drinking, nor will you."
"I haven't even started." She said, simply.
"I'll soon put a stop to that."
He stood, suddenly very agile, then conjured a second glass and poured the wine into it. Henrietta took this moment to pour the contents of the sachet into his own glass.
"Voila." He put it down in front of her. "Now, drink. Don't be so stupid. Drink your woes away, don't be the responsible woman you are."
"I don't want to, Loki."
"Tough." He gave a grin. "I've decided to get you as wasted as I am now. And, Henrietta, I get what I want. I do what I want. So is my nature, and it is futile to fight with it. Ah…"
He looked into her, growing solemn, then a mischievous spark emerged from the confines of his eyes.
"Little Knottie, all grown up. I didn't think I'd ever see it, to be perfectly honest. She's as beautiful and fresh as a meadow full of daisies. More so."
"How kind of you to say." She said blandly, but couldn't stop herself from blushing because he said it so sincerely, she believed him. She tried not to look at his mouth, at his eyes, for he would have no trouble with her once he reeled her in.
"Kind?" He chuckled. "No. I'm far from that word, but I am observant."
He took her by the chin, keeping her face pointed at him with both his hands.
"And I observe something far more beautiful beneath her eyes… Something that I fear, but love the taste of. Can you love, Henrietta, dear, darling sweet and fragile?"
His voice grew softer, his touch softer. Hattie blushed and stammered.
"Not yet, not yet, Loki of Asgard." She replied, casting her eyes down. "Don't make me go against my own will. You know that it hurts later."
Loki stared at her. He lowered his hands. His eyes grew sad and solemn.
"You speak the truth."
A sad laugh was forced through his chest.
"The truth. Something that I lack. I will always lack that little element."
He retreated back onto his chair, fell into it, then picked up the wine glass.
"Oh, but you're cleverer than I give you credit for. You tried to distract me from this, didn't you?"
She widened her eyes and smiled innocently.
"No. Finish it, and go to bed."
He looked at her quizzically over the rim of his glass, swallowing.
"Drink your own, Hattie. Taste sin every once in a while."
"No, Loki. There is nothing good in doing so." She murmured, pouring it back into the bottle. "It does well to practise restraint every once in a while."
His eyes narrowed.
"You're up to something."
"I am." She replied, corking it and sitting down on the chair. Loki swilled his drink around the glass and emptied it, not taking his eyes off her.
"I'm going to find out." He shrugged, sighing, his hand already dwindling down to his chest as his eyes began to droop. "None can trick the god of mischief, Loki Laufeyson, the Silver-Tongued… the Lie-Smith… the Cunning…"
He dropped his glass and gave a sad sigh.
"The Cruel…"
He was asleep. There was something about the sight of him, fitted awkwardly into the armchair with an empty glass of wine on his chest that saddened her deeply.
She wanted to share his pain, to help him. She wanted to make him happy, truly happy, as he was sometimes when he came to visit her.
She satisfied herself with cleaning up, sweeping the glass and doing her best with the wine stains, pausing to look at him every once in a while. A crease had formed between his brows. She remembered his dreams, back when his mouth was still shut, about the blue monster and everybody watching. He seemed to be afraid of himself, the man he was now, but - why was he not doing anything about it, succumbing to hatred and pride?
Hattie did not know. She could only hope and think how to make an inference, to be patient, for she had sworn that she would be many times, as she had sworn herself a virgin until marriage.
Loki woke, feeling as though something was holding his eyelids shut by force.
He tried to remember where he was, who he was, and what on earth he was doing in somebody else's bed. Perhaps there had been a feast, a gathering, and he had… oh no.
He groaned, not daring to open his eyes. Seeing nothing but a wall and the covers of a single bed, he breathed a sigh of relief. Loki Laufeyson did not need more problems in his life and, thankfully, he had kept himself out of them, this time.
Then, he realised that he was no longer Odinson, nor, in fact, in Asgard. He looked at his hand and felt a spike of panic in his chest, for he was blue, not white.
Turn, turn, turn, turn…
Slowly, very slowly, the white edged back up his skin. He nodded in relief, then whimpered, for it felt as though he had just bashed his brain around in his skull.
Not a second too soon, for the door opened slowly and in came a very pretty lady, that he instantly recognised as Kenrietta Hott.
"You're finally awake." She murmured, placing something down on the bedside table beside him. "I honestly thought you were going to sleep for two days."
He tried to say something along the lines of enquiring about the time of day, but what came out of his mouth was nothing near that.
Hattie laughed.
"It's quarter past three in the afternoon. Drink this, it'll help you feel better. And you better put on a shirt… oh."
Hattie looked down at Loki on the bed, and furrowed her brows.
"What are these?" She almost whispered, running a finger gently over his back. It was crisscrossed with black scars, angry-looking and cruel. "You couldn't have gotten these in Asgard."
"I didn't." He muttered, eyes half-closed and his hair a mess.
"Then what-?"
They started at the base of his neck, then ran down his back and ended just above his hips.
"Hattie." He whispered, not moving. "Next time I want to drink, please pour the contents of the bottles down the drain."
"I don't know." She suppressed a giggle. "I have no idea what you would have done if I did."
He furrowed his brows. She noticed.
"You have no idea what happened yesterday, have you?"
"After coming back from Stark Tower? Absolutely none." He replied slowly. "Was I that difficult?"
"You were trying to force me to get drunk or, as you put it, indulge in sin."
"...Oh."
"You also were talking about being the worse sibling and was saying something about Odin."
They were silent for a while.
"You didn't meet Thor in the tower, did you?" Henrietta asked after a moment of thinking.
Loki shifted uncomfortably with a tired sigh.
"You ask so many questions, Knottie."
"And you answer none of them." She finished tracing his scars and sat down, looking at him expectantly. He held her gaze, then looked at the floor.
"You want to know what they are? They are milestones, Hattie. Each one marked the distance I drifted from who I used to be." He said, slowly. "They mark the fact that there is no going back."
"I don't believe that."
Loki laughed a tired laugh and shifted, so that he could look into her face. Seeing that she averted her eyes, he magicked on his clothes.
"You don't have to believe that, but it's the truth. Hattie."
He looked her in the eyes.
"I don't… I don't think I can face another incident."
"...Incident?"
"Incident. You know I was in the dungeons of Asgard. You know I had my lips sewn together. You know I was sentenced to rot in there until my dying breath."
He stared up at the ceiling, smiling uncannily. Hattie waited for him to continue.
"I can't go back in there. The torture… there's not a word in this language that can reflect the horrors of it. It wasn't bodily damage that did it, by my reckoning." He sank deep into thought, folding his hands upon his stomach. "It was up here."
He tapped his skull.
"If something disturbs me to that point again... Well. You wouldn't believe it, but…"
He clenched his hands and gritted his teeth.
"But I'm afraid of the consequences. Death is not an option for me, unless Odin - the one who I called father, once - permits it. No, don't do that, Hattie."
He gently unhooked her hand from his.
"I don't deserve it. Not from you."
Hattie sighed and drew her hand back.
"You're not only causing pain for yourself, you know?" She said, passing him the drink. "You're disabling me from making friends with you."
He looked pained, but tried to hide it with a grin as he took the cup from her.
"I would never make friends with me, unless I was crazy. Are you crazy, Henrietta Knott?"
She waited for him to turn to her, but when he didn't, she sighed and rose, stretching.
"I don't know. We'll find out soon enough. But you still didn't tell me where you got those marks from."
Loki choked on his drink and smiled.
"Does the name Thanos mean anything to you?"
She looked blank.
"You're not missing anything." He muttered, sipping on the drink. "That being's crazier than I ever was and will be. He did it. Stroked me with a whip and other… Tools… day and night, until I said: Yes, I'll get that tesseract for you. Thanks for the army. Not that I didn't want the army… and then New York just happened to be in the way…"
He withered under her gaze.
"I was there, Loki. I saw you stand with them. The Chitauri. I couldn't believe it. And yet, there you were in the dark whilst the building's crumbled."
"And you stayed there?" He scoffed, finishing the drink. "With buildings crumbling all around? There was me thinking you had some sense."
"Is that why you were in the dungeons?" She said quietly, her lips a thin line. "Did Odin send you there?"
"Yes. He did."
Loki was beginning to grow impatient with this conversation. The sickness was tightening its grip on him again and the man within him wouldn't stop trembling.
"Your own father?" She whispered, looking away.
"He's not my father, Henrietta. Anyhow. Let us stop this foolishness."
He got up, clicked his fingers. His green sparks crowned him in splendour, his clothes black and rich, his cape billowing, his eyes cruel and cunning.
"It's time for me to think about where my place truly is."
And he left her sitting there, deep in thought, the chaos his mind unleashed craving satisfaction, cobwebs gathering in the places he almost moved through to seek peace.
Hello, it's Anonymitea64. I wanted to let you know that this exact same story is on Wattpad in full, if you are interested.
All the best, God bless,
Anonymitea64
