Katara is running and is out of breath, she looks up to the sky and sees the black snow falling all around her. She looks arounds and sees everyone scrambling to hide from the Fire Nation. Why does it take her so long to reach the igloo? She pushes herself as hard as she can and looks at her legs. She realises she is eight again, and she's running to her mom. No, No! She won't let it happen again! Where is her dad? He should be there already. She opens the curtain and sees her mother's charred corpse on the ground, eyes closed and completely still. She's too late, always too late… She kneels beside her and starts crying, burying her face in her hands. It's a familiar nightmare, one that has haunted her ever since that day, and one that always shatters her heart into pieces. But tonight, her mother is not just lying there, she opens her eyes and looks at Katara, hurt written all over her features, then she says, "You should have killed him."
Zuko is woken up by a gut-wrenching scream echoing in the cave, he is instantly alert and in a bending position, summoning a flame in his palm. He expects that Katara was attacked and frantically looks at his surroundings. But all he sees is Katara, she is sitting on her bedroll, eyes wide open in horror and tears pouring down her face. Her hand is clutching her necklace, and she is breathing so fast, heaving. Zuko closes the distance between them in a heartbeat, it must have been a horrible nightmare. He can relate to that.
"Katara…" He starts, hoping to get her out of her trance. "Katara, I'm here, please look at me." She turns her head to look at him "You're OK. I'm here with you." Her eyes don't leave his, they're so big so and so full of fear and something else…Guilt? Shame? He doesn't know, but he doesn't have time to think about it, she still seems to struggle to breathe, and he needs to help her.
"Hey, hey, look at me and follow my lead: Breath in for seven, hold for seven, and out for seven. Trust me it will help." He says, demonstrating. He doesn't know when it happened, but his hands are holding hers, squeezing to help her with her breathing.
Katara tries to follow his instructions and it seems to help, if only a little. His hands are warm, still holding hers, and for some reason it grounds her. She can't take her eyes off him, his are full of concern and worry, how this this happen? How did they end up here? She hated him and was so angry at him only yesterday, and now he was here comforting her, and it felt so natural, she felt so safe. She doesn't have time to think about it more because her mother's words keep repeating in her mind. She should have killed him. Even her mother thought so. She looks down at their hands and can't stop the stream of tears. She is crying again, shaking with every sob, feeling disgusted with herself. She is pathetic and weak, helpless then and still helpless now.
But suddenly, strong arms envelop her, encasing her in a warm cocoon. Zuko holds her tight, a hand on the back of her head, whispering reassurances she barely hears, and somehow it feels right to tell him everything.
"I-I am pathetic." She says sniffling." I should have killed him…but I was too weak, even my mother thinks so. I-n my dream, she was so disappointed at me…" she continues.
She can feel Zuko's heartbeat quicken, and he squeezes her just a little tighter, as if it stung to hear her say talk about herself like that, as if to reassure her she's OK. "You're not weak." He says in a low voice. "You're one of the strongest, bravest people I know. Please don't ever think about yourself like that." She can hear the sincerity in his words, this for some reason, makes her cry even more. "It was just a nightmare, it wasn't real, just your subconscious playing up your fears." He explains. "I am sure your mother would be proud of your choices; of everything you are because you are amazing."
She scoffs at that, amazing? That has to be a joke. But he continues, trying to lighten up the mood a little. "Why do you think I want your approval so bad?" And it does make her smile a bit.
Zuko can feel her relax just a bit in his embrace. It makes his stomach flutter; he is relieved that he can at least ease her pain and that she seems to trust him enough to allow him to comfort her. He hopes she never has to feel like this again but knows from experience that this sort of trauma doesn't just go away. Zuko hates seeing her like this, and more than anything he hates knowing it's all because of his country, they have managed to hurt the entire world, him and her included. He tenses up and she seems to realise and gets out of his embrace. She's looking down now, no doubt feeling embarrassed, and he wants to reassure her that she doesn't need to be.
"Thank you Zuko." She beats him and speaks first "I'm used to nightmares about that day, and I am usually better at dealing with them, but this one was…a lot. I am sorry I'm being like this." She continues, wiping tears from her face. "How did you know what to do? To calm me down? That breathing technique really worked."
"Please Katara, you don't need to apologise. And the breathing technique…I have nightmares too…" He responds looking down "My uncle taught me. It helps with panic attacks."
"Oh." Is all she says, and she doesn't prod or ask him any uncomfortable question, he is glad. He does not want to add to her distress right now and tell her about his scar. He will later if she wants to hear it.
They're still sitting very close to each other, each seemingly lost in their own thoughts. The silence is not awkward though, it's comfortable, calm, and understanding.
"Can I sleep next to you?" Katara asks breaking the silence. "I'm a bit cold and I think it'll help me sleep." Her cheeks are flushed and Zuko can't help the red that rises to his own cheeks.
"Uh, sure." He nods, moving his sleeping bag closer to hers. It's almost sunrise, he realises, and storm is showing no sign of letting down, of course she would still be cold.
They both lie back in their sleeping bags. Zuko can't sleep, so he listens to Katara's breathing slow down until it's steady and he knows she fell asleep. He is somehow relieved and finally closes his eyes, he knows he won't get much sleep anyway, but even just an hour would be better than nothing.
Katara wakes up after a few hours of dreamless sleep, the sky is still grey and stormy, but she can tell the sun has been up for a while. She realises Zuko is already awake and meditating in a corner of the cave, he turns around as he hears her stretch.
"Good morning." Zuko greets. "Sleep well?" He asks, seeming concerned.
"Yes, no nightmares." She says, smiling at him, then looks outside. "It looks like the storm is still going, what should we do?"
"I don't think Appa can fly in this weather, but I saw a village not too far when we were heading here, maybe we should get some food and come back here? It seems safe enough to stay until the rain stops." Her stomach growls at the mention of food, she hasn't eaten since yesterday morning.
"Food is great idea." She replies, then remembers that she was too angry to think about bringing any money. "Do we have any money though?"
Zuko nods "Yes, I thought I might as well bring some, you never know."
"Good, thank you." She says gratefully. "Will you be OK going into town though? Someone might recognise you." They are in the Fire Nation after all, sneaking around to follow Yon Rha was necessary, but she can go to town by herself, so she doesn't put him in anymore risk. "I can go and bring us food if not."
"Don't worry, I should be fine. The village is going to be empty with the storm and I can use my hood." Katara reluctantly agrees and they start getting ready to head into town.
The village is small and pretty much empty, almost everything is closed, she only sees a few people here and there. She is happy that Zuko was right about that. They go to one of the only open shops and are greeted by an old man, their visit is quick and to the point.
They get their provisions and start heading back to the cave. Even though it goes without incident, Katara feels like they're being watched the whole time. She looks around and sees two men standing next to a closed shop, probably just two friends talking, she reassures herself and follows Zuko's lead.
As they walk through the woods back to the cave, Katara can't shake the awful feeling of being watched, she is sure she hears something, and it's definitely not rain. She stops for a second and turns around trying to figure out what it was she just heard. Zuko sees her and stops as well.
"Zuko, did you hear this?" She asks.
"No, what is it? All I hear is rain." Zuko replies looking around as well.
"OK, I guess I'm just being paranoid…" Katara tries to reassure him and herself but she's feeding more and more watched.
"Ahh!" She suddenly hears Zuko scream as she feels something sting her thigh. She looks at him, everything is blurry, and she can feel herself falling. Katara tries to call out for Zuko, but nothing comes out. She sees him fall on the ground. Everything seems to slow down but she can't stop herself from falling too. The last thing she sees before darkness engulfs her is a figure picking up Zuko's limp body.
