Author's Note: I also wanted to say that I don't actually speak French or any other foreign languages fluently. Everything seen in the last chapter with Glass Joe's dialogue was done thanks to the help of the Bing search engine's translator. I will be using that for future chapters, but even they can have their errors no doubt, so feel free to help if I might have mistranslated something.

Until then, it's on with the story!

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Chapter 3: A Side of Haymaker

** A Few Days Later **

Little Mac stood punching away at the heavy bag in front of him, throwing a few jabs before swaying to avoid the imaginary blows thrown at him, treating it as if he were in an actual boxing match.

"Congrats, Mac baby!" Mr. Sandman called out, bringing him to a halt.

"What is it?" Mac asked turning to face his trainer.

"You're back on the front page," Mr. Sandman said raising the newspaper, a black and white photo of Little Mac standing triumphant following his comeback match against Billy Bob Bashem. "I wonder if they'll start making those dolls of you if you keep at this."

"Oh boy..." Mac shuddered, knowing how those are forever, especially once he's old and gray.

"But first things first, champ," Mr. Sandman said rising to his feet.

"You got it," Mac said as the two men exited the training area and made their way down the hall and through the curtain, where another capacity crowd had shown up to witness the upcoming fight.

Mac climbed into the ring and met his next opponent, a stocky man with greasy black hair that was slicked back, blue eyes and a prominent handlebar mustache. He wore green, white and red trunks, black boots, and a pair of red boxing gloves.

Boxer Stats: Alfredo Fettuccine

Rank: Bronze Circuit #3

Fight Record: 8-8 (6 KO's)

Age: 32

Height: 6' 2"

Weight: 274 lbs.

From: Rome, Italy

Signature Move: Meatball Masher

Rendition of Punch-Out Theme: A peppy Italian cover with operatic male vocals

- Pre-Fight Slideshow -

Scene 1: Alfredo is shown in a kitchen, clad in a typical white chef's outfit and matching hat, with two pans in hand and unseen steaming food within.

Scene 2: Alfredo is shown laying a platter of freshly cooked spaghetti down before a younger couple.

Scene 3: Alfredo is then shown with his hand over his chest, singing opera music for the other patrons in his restaurant.

Scene 4: Alfredo is shown standing proud with a tear in his eye as a rose is tossed his way, the famed Colosseum shown prominently in the background.

- End Slideshow -

Alfredo Fettuccine looked Mac over and laughed heartily while patting his stomach.

"Ha! Sembri più fragile degli spaghetti! Questo dovrebbe essere un gioco da ragazzi! (Ha! You look more flimsy than spaghetti! This should be a piece of cake!)" the Italian laughed before assuming a fighting stance.

The referee then stepped in and yelled, "Fight!"

Alfredo Fettuccine made the first move with a right jab that caught Mac off guard, "Mangialo! (Eat it!)" he cried. "Mangialo!" he tried following up with another jab, yet Mac dodged him this time. "Ehi! (Hey!)" he cried in surprise as Mac went for the opening and managed to land four hits before Alfredo was knocked backwards, little meatballs swirling around his head as he was stunned. He quickly shook it off and smirked at Mac before moving to his right for another jab, yet nothing happened and he winked at Mac before catching him off guard with a left-handed haymaker, "Ha ha!"

"He's a slippery fellow. I gotta remember that," Mac told himself.

Alfredo stood proud, letting out a hearty laughter and patting his stomach. It left him wide open and Mac jabbed him for a star.

Star Count: 1

"Mangialo!" Alfredo cried out, yet Mac saw an opening and struck him for another star.

Star Count: 2

"Ha ha!" Alfredo again attempted to fake Mac out, moving to the right before following up with another left-handed haymaker, yet Mac had caught on and dodged the incoming blow. "Oh no!" he cried out before Mac followed up with six blows in response before finishing with a Winking Uppercut. "Mangialo!" he shouted looking for another jab, yet Mac countered for another star.

Star Count: 3

"Time to take this guy down," Mac told himself as he gathered his stars and delivered a Star Punch.

"Oh, mamma mia! (Oh, goodness me!)" Alfredo cried out before he was struck upside the head by the powerful uppercut and sent stumbling backwards to the mat.

Alfredo Fettuccine Knockdowns: 1

Round Time Left: 2:12

1! 2! 3! 4! 5! 6!

Alfredo picked himself up and popped his neck back into place.

"Non è ancora fuori vapore! (Not outta steam yet!)"

"Come on, come on! Fight!" the referee cried.

Alfredo again showed surprising speed, nailing Mac with another uppercut and sending him stumbling backward, but again he stopped and let out a hearty laugh and rubbed his tummy, leaving him open for another jab from Mac.

Star Count: 1

"Mangialo!" he called out, launching another jab Mac dodged. Mac rallied and landed four additional hits on the Italian and knocked him backward. Alfredo shook the blows off and then smirked at Mac before stepping backward and then launching himself forth, bringing his fist down like a hammer, "Schiacciati come una polpetta! (Mash you like a meatball!)" he cried out.

The blow struck Mac and sent him reeling backwards and Alfredo tried following up with another haymaker, yet Mac saw the blow coming and delivered a counter-punch for a star.

Star Count: 1

"Ora! (Now!)" Alfredo tried following up with another uppercut, yet Mac dodged the strike, "Oh no!" Mac fired back with five blows before delivering a delayed punch of his own that knocked the Italian chef backward.

Mac could see his opponent was getting tired, but unwilling to give up just yet.

"Mangialo!" Alfredo said trying to throw another jab that was dodged and Mac followed up with four additional hits, "Ehi!" The Italian boxer suddenly stepped backward, readying for another Meatball Masher, yet Mac saw him coming. He remembered how the blow reminded him somewhat of Bear Hugger's Bear Hug attack, he wouldn't have been able to dodge and simply ducked the move, causing the chef to strike empty air, "Che cosa? (What?)"

Alfredo was slow to recover and Mac followed up with a rapid fire flurry of eight punches, the last punch being enough to send Alfredo stumbling backwards and onto his back.

Alfredo Fettuccine Knockdowns: 2

Round Time Left: 1:01

1! 2! 3! 4! 5! 6! 7! 8!

Alfredo picked himself back up and again cracked his neck back into place before resuming his fighting stance.

"Come on, come on! Fight!" the referee called.

"Ora!" Alfredo nailed Little Mac with his uppercut.

Star Count: 0

"Mangialo!" he tried for another jab, yet Mac counter-punched to regain a lost star.

Star Count: 1

Alfredo reared back and prepared to leap forward for another Meatball Masher. Mac had to act fast and needed to put him down. It was time to launch another Star Punch and he waited for Alfredo to launch himself before he socked the Italian in the jaw, causing him to let out one final bellow before falling backward in dramatic fashion.

TKO!

"Yeah!' Mac shouted jubilantly as the crowd roared in approval. He let out one final fist pump in victory, "Whoo-hoo!"

"Now that's how ya' do it, Mac baby! Another chump sent to Dreamland!" Mr. Sandman shouted.

Victory by TKO! (1st Round with 0:20 remaining)

Fight Record: 2-0 (2 KO's)

New Rank: Bronze Circuit #3

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Unused Quotes:

Intermission:

"Ogni piccolo dettaglio richiede il massimo del cuore... Soprattutto quando si appalta un barbaro incivile come te! (Every little detail requires the utmost heart...especially when flattening an uncivilized barbarian like you!)"

"Cucinare è un'arte raffinata! La boxe è un'arte molto raffinata! Tu sei solo spazzatura da grondaia. (Cooking is a most fine art! Boxing is a most fine art! You are mere gutter trash.)"

New Round Start:

Alfredo Fettuccine rises to his feet and claps his hands, "Non siamo ancora arrivati al piatto principale! Andiamo! (We're not even at the main course yet! Let's go!)

Win Match:

Alfredo grabs the microphone hanging from the ceiling and begins to sing part of "Una furtiva lagrima" until he hits a particularly high note that breaks the camera.

Mr. Sandman Tips:

"This guy spends too much time in the kitchen! Show him how we do things here in the ring!"

"Don't be fooled by his size. He's as slippery as you can get. Make sure to be on the alert when he leaps to the right."

"C'mon Mac baby, let's leave this joker singing the blues!"

"Watch out when he goes for the Meatball Masher. Duck when you see it coming!"

"Let's serve this chump a five star course of TKO!"

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Author's Note: And so another domino falls as Little Mac begins his long climb back to the top! Who will he face off against next? Stay tuned to find out!

Alfredo Fettuccine is inspired by Luigi Risotto from "The Simpsons."

Until then, read and review! This is Metal Harbinger saying KEEP IT FUCKING METAL!