Eric
Well, last night was…interesting. After Jackie's declaration and my...call it response to it, we fell asleep on the couch.
I was sleeping quite peacefully until I heard a loud "Screech" that woke me up. I looked at the clock above the television-about 9AM.
The "Screech" began again, okay it was more of a ringing, a ringing coming from the end table nest to the couch.
Uggh, the phone.
Jackie had woken up too, and I quickly, grudgingly untangled myself from her and got the phone.
"Hello?" I asked groggily.
"Honey, are you okay? You were supposed to be over here for breakfast," said Mom. Aunt Paula had taken Grandma Bea back to her retirement home for the night, but with my mom being herself, Aunt Paula, Uncle Frank, Uncle Marty, Uncle Jerry, and Aunt Louise were staying with my parents. Aunt Paula was supposed to bring my grandmother back for the day though.
Oops. "Oh, sorry, MOM. I must have forgotten to set my alarm." I made sure to yell "Mom" so Jackie would understand the situation.
"Didn't Jackie set one?" Mom enquired.
"I guess not. She was pretty tired," I replied, desperately trying to keep the smirk out of my voice.
"That's not like her. Is she feeling okay?" Mom asked. I smiled. Always a mother.
"Yeah, she's fine. We'll get there as soon as we can. Love you, Mom."
"Love you too, honey," Mom replied and then hung up. Annnd I can already hear Red ranting about what a dumbass I am for sleeping late. I'm not a young child anymore, and I had a very nice night, and, well, Red, dislikes Jackie less than most people. Besides, one would think he's got more than enough people to yell at right now.
I hung up the phone, and, finding the bathroom locked with the hiss of the shower coming through the door.
"Not gonna risk her wrath…" I said to myself. Jackie could be rather …possessive about the shower. I went to my room and got new clothes for the day before flipping through the channels on the TV with my folded new clothes on my lap. After waiting too long, I finally heard the bathroom door open to reveal my roommate? Friend-with-benefits? Girlfriend? Whatever she was, she was gorgeous. I picked up my clothing and ran over to the bathroom. "Wow! Will you be my girlfriend?" I asked, trying to be cute. I thought about batting my eyes, but it would be too much.
"Maybe, after our date," Jackie replied with a smile.
"Okay, I'll get ready, and then we'll go back to my parents," I suggested.
"Sounds like a plan. Is there anything else we need to bring?" Jackie asked.
"Nope. We left the presents under the tree last night, and since Mom has a rather...dim view of anyone else's cooking…" Dim view was an understatement. She still remarks on Jackie's attempts at baking for a Home Economics project.
"What about her family?"
"I don't think Aunt Paula does a lot of her own cooking, and I think Grandma will just let Mom do everything."
"Oh, okay," Jackie replied, like she'd never considered the relationships of the Sigurdson women.
"See you in a few," I replied before kissing her on the cheek and walking into the bathroom.
I got everything done in there, and walked out back into the living room, trying not to give myself time to think. What are we doing? Is this gonna screw up everything? What if it doesn't work out? What's my family going to say?
Still the thoughts invaded my mind.
Jackie was standing near the front door wearing her coat, and she came over, and looked me straight in the eyes. It's going to be okay, she seemed to say without saying a word. "Are you ready?" she asked.
"Yeah, I'll get my coat, and we can go," I replied.
I put on my coat-one good thing about Kenya-no 30°F days, and we walked down to Jackie's car. I'd finally traded in the Cruiser about a year and a half after I got back from Africa-it was just too old, and as much as Red liked tinkering with it, there were certainly better ways for even a retired man to use his time. I had put the money into a savings account for a while, and we got along with just Jackie's car, some American model, but I didn't really pay much attention. She was pretty insistent on driving in bad conditions, so I jokingly called, "Shotgun!"
As she got in, she replied, a little exasperated, "Eric, there are only two of us!"
"I know, but it's fun to say it," I replied, unable to keep the glee put of my voice.
As we buckled our seat belts, Jackie asked, "What am I going to do with you?"
"I have a suggestion," I answered, wagging my eyebrows.
"Eric Albert Forman!" she exclaimed as she got us onto the main road.
We rode in a comfortable silence for a couple minutes. I knew better than to touch the radio. And then Jackie asked, "So we didn't have much time to talk…"
Playfully, I responded, "About what? New ways to insult Hyde? Who's cuter Wookiees or Ewoks?"
Jackie got serious, "A couple things-us and your family."
Okay, lets put off the real conversation as long as possible.
"So my family. There's my parents, you know them, you love them. My sister…"
"How is the skank?" Jackie asked, unable to keep the contempt out of her voice, which was understandable.
"Mom said she called yesterday. Still dancing in Canada. Roadtrip?" I joked. Jackie just rolled her eyes contemptuously.
"Then there's Grandma Bea…"
"Yeah, she's the one who made me realize how I feel about you," Jackie answered with a small smile.
"Wow, no Grandma Burn this time," I replied earnestly as Jackie drove onto the highway onramp.
"Then there's Mom's fraternal twin sister Paula. You'll like her, she sells make up. Even still has the pink Cadillac to prove it."
"Okay, I'll be sure to look out for her," Jackie answered with hope in her voice before pausing, "Wait, didn't they have a party recently?" she asked, incredulous.
"Yeah, stupid midterms. We both should have been there." Mom and Paula had celebrated their fiftieth birthday two months ago, but we both had midterms to deal with.
"And then there's their older brother Frank. He's an engineer who works for NASA. He's married to my Aunt Linda, and Penny you met is their daughter. And that's it for Mom's side." I said with a straight face while desperately trying to forget the incest-Burn incident.
"Okay, so what about your Dad's side? I know your grandparents are gone."
Jackie paused, and knowing her as well as I do, there was a very soft sadness to her face. She does care! Where's my camera?
"Yeah, I don't really remember my grandfather well. He died when I was maybe…three. And Grandma Bernice…"
"Made an impression," Jackie finished matter-of-factly.
"That's one way to put it. I know this won't happen, but I wouldn't ever let Mom treat you the way Grandma Bernice treated her."
"Thanks, Eric," Jackie replied softly. Even I noticed that she was really touched by that.
"And then there's Dad's brothers. He's the oldest. Uncle Jerry is the middle child, and Uncle Marty is the youngest. Marty isn't married and I never got a clear idea of what he does-it's like what happened with Kelso and his dad…And then there's Uncle Jerry. He's a commodities trader, like that Dan Aykroyd character in that movie we saw in July…"
"Trading Places?"
"Yeah that's it, that's what he does, just without the uggh Duke brothers. Anyway, he supposedly makes a TON of money, and he's married to my Aunt Louise, who, I would say is a socialite, so, like your mom, just without the…"
"Yeah, I get it."
"Well, that's all the Formans and Sigurdsons. What about the Burkharts and the…I'm sorry I don't know your Mom's family."
"Mom never talked about her family, so other than almost having Mr. Pinciotti as a step-dad…" Jackie answered, seeming trying and failing to keep the venom out of her voice.
Yeah, I get it. He's a nice man, but he can be a bit much.
We shared another look in the car, and it was if she could hear my thoughts. Gosh, it's like we're perfect one another, sharing a moment of understanding no one else would know.
"What about your dad?"
"Daddy was an only child. My grandmother died when I was five, and someone at the funeral mentioned that we used to be Burkhardts rather than Burkharts."
"So…German?"
"Probably. I wouldn't mention that around your father though."
"Yeah. While he actually only fought the Japanese, Koreans, and Chinese, he utterly hated the Nazis too. He told me once that, at the time, he actually laughed at how stupid Hitler was when he declared war on us. That Germany wouldn't know what hit it," I replied with bravado.
"Sounds like your dad."
"Yep."
"Okay, now that we've discussed our lovely families and World War II, do you want to talk about us?"
I fell silent for a moment, feeling the panic build up in me as I said the next few words.
"You're not gonna hurt me like Donna did, are you?"
Without pause, she declared: "Nope. I'm better."
Gulp. The silence fell again, the panic building up to new heights within me, waiting for her words, words that could change everything.
"So, Eric, how do you feel about me? I was honest with you last night, and I don't do that for everyone."
"I guess I'm in love with you too."
"You guess?"
Typical Jackie.
"I know. But I did live in denial for years, now that I think about it, and I'm worried."
"How long?"
"If I'm being honest, probably six years ago, when you broke up with Kelso. I just didn't realize it," I confessed.
"Same for me…you're still a good kisser."
I blushed, "I try, and my secret is chapstick."
"What are you worried about, Eric?" Jackie asked, seemingly genuinely curious.
"Well, you're really important to me, and I don't wanna screw this up. We're roommates too. And what's everyone gonna say? We've been keeping being friends so secret that, for the most part, they still think we hate each other. And then there's our families…"
"Eric, one thing at a time." she ordered.
"Okay." Huh, I'm calmer now. I guess I'm used to domineering people. Let's leave Red out of this though. But seriously, on the surface she's kinda scary, you just have to see beyond that-it comes from love and protectiveness. Certainly stronger than I ever got with Donna. Yeah, I think I can live with this.
"First thing. We've been friends long before this started. So let's keep that in mind and take any progression in our relationship one step at a time."
"Uhhhuh."
"Second, what friends? Steven and Donna made their choices. Fez is somewhere doing who-knows-what. So who cares what they think?" Jackie replied, her voice dripping with bitterness.
"Kelso…"
"Michael is too busy dating and parenting, but I'd like to think he'd be okay with us."
"But my family…"
"Our families. It won't come up, but first-no hitting on my mother."
"Deal."
"Daddy actually liked you, at least before the streaking incident."
"So he has good taste. At least his daughter does," I responded with a smirk, which received an eyeroll in response.
"Eric, I'm being serious."
"Okay, but I have a rule too."
"Which is?"
"No hitting on Red."
"Eww, Eric, that goes without saying. He's like a hundred. But getting back to my point-your family."
"Will love you. I sure do."
Jackie, clearly touched, "Really?"
"Red always liked you more than the others, especially Donna with all her 'feminist bullcrap.' Kelso and Fez are the obvious dumbasses. Hyde...it's complicated."
"Why?"
"He was like another son, one he actually liked better than me, but he goes and disappoints both my parents with everything…" I replied bitterly, as we got off the highway.
"Okay," Jackie replied, clearly uncomfortable with casually discussing Hyde and wanting to move on from him both in this conversation and generally, in terms of her life.
"Mom's always wanted a daughter to fuss over, and with Laurie being…unpleasant and in another country and me and Donna being broken up…Anyway, you'll be fine," I assured her.
"Really? The cooking thing…"
"She'll keep trying…Let's see, you and Paula and make up…check. Grandma likes you…"
"I have a question about her. Last night, we were talking and she said something…skogs-are-something…"
"I dunno. Sounds Swedish. Maybe something she heard from Grandpa's mother? She was a Swedish immigrant who moved back there after Great-Grandpa Sigurdson died." Continuing after a pause, "Anyway, Uncle Marty gets along with everybody, except Red," I grinned, trying not to ramble. Jackie grinned back.
"Uncle Frank lives in Florida. He should be fine now that I explained about exactly what happened with me and Penny…"
"Bet that was awkward…" Jackie smirked.
"You have no idea," I replied truthfully.
"And last, but not least, Uncle Jerry and Aunt Louise…" I announced.
"Why wouldn't I have met them before? Wouldn't they have come to your dad's mother's funeral?"
"They were on a cruise and couldn't get back in time."
"Ouch."
"It's worse actually. Red couldn't even contact them through the cruise line. Their ship was in a storm that knocked out the ship's radio for a few days."
"Talk about a bad homecoming," Jackie grimly mused.
"Yeah, yeah, almost as bad as coming in second for Snow Queen…"
"Ha ha, Eric," Jackie replied sarcastically.
"Anyhow, they're rich and live in Chicago. We don't see them much because Red is himself and thinks they look down on him for being middle-class. Jerry even offered to help when they cut Red's hours back at the plant, but Red turned him down. And he wasn't nice about it either."
"Are they okay?"
"Yeah, eventually Mom talked Red down. They're good now. I don't know what circles they mixed in, so they might know your parents or at least know about them. I dunno," I answered, unsure.
"So I'll just stay away from them without looking like staying away," Jackie suggested.
"Just walk casually. Worked for Han Solo," I quipped, which got a sigh from her. Even the depressing nature of driving through Point Place couldn't dampen my mood.
I took a deep breath, "So the other questions. 'What are we?' And 'What do we tell them?'"
"What do you want to be?"
"I was only kinda sorta joking before, but boyfriend-girlfriend sounds good to me, but if you want to wait until we've actually gone on a date…"
"Eric, we've been dating without the benefits of it for years now. We've literally been living together. Me being your girlfriend is okay with me," said Jackie.
"Benefits?" I asked, with a smirk, thinking of those benefits.
"You better wipe that damn smile off your face, Eric! They'll figure it out!"
"Okay, Jackie. So, what do we tell them? I mean they're pretty smart, unless we keep it a secret. Oooh, I can be your dirty little secret.. " I smirked again.
"Eric," Jackie replied in such a way that showed me she was somehow both amused and exasperated at the same time.
"Okay, okay. It's none of their business. I mean we just officially decided to start dating a minute ago…"
"Sounds good."
With that, we continued in companionable silence for a couple minutes to 416 Marie Drive. Being a gentleman, I helped her out of the car. For now, no one suspected anything yet.
We had a nice time milling around with my family until after lunch, and then things went a little sideways.
We thought we were alone in the kitchen. Someone had hung a piece of mistletoe from the light fixture. We both happened to notice it when we both happened to be standing under it, and then we started kissing, really more like making out. Unfortunately, we didn't hear the door to the living room open.
"What the hell?!" yelled Red.
We stopped kissing to notice my parents. "Mom, Dad," I said, nodding to them an nonchalantly as possible.
"What were you doing?!" asked Red loudly.
"You see, Dad, when a boy likes a girl very much…" I trailed off as he glared.
"I think we know what they were doing," said Mom, a little exasperatedly.
"Well, Mr. Forman, you did say I had your blessing to date him," said Jackie as innocently as possible.
It didn't stop Red from storming off though. Like clockwork, when he gets news he doesn't particularly like.
Looking to Jackie, Mom said, "I think you can call us Kitty and Red now."
AN: The "Sounds Swedish" comment is a reference to the film Star Trek First Contact when the Lily Sloane character remarks on the name "Borg." The "wipe that smile" comment from Jackie is a reference to something Red says during the show when he's discussing father-son relationships and Eric, really, probably Mr. Grace, smirks involuntarily.
