Chapter 135 – Dreams to Reality
When Jack got upstairs, Elizabeth was laying on the bed. He went to her and wrapped her in his arms.
"I am sorry about Ma." Jack said. "I honestly don't know what her problem is. I told her that if she can't accept those little girls, then she will need to think twice about visiting. I am not going to turn my back on those girls. I already love them. I love you and I know that we are stronger together."
"Thank you." Elizabeth said. "I love those girls as well. Not only because they are the daughters of a good friend, but also because they are your blood relation. When Little Beth ran to you and jumped in your arms. The only thing that I could think about was that I hope that our kids were as excited to see you when you came home every day. I wanted to see that smile that was on your face when you picked her up. Any lingering doubts about what a great father you would be disappeared at that moment."
"Thank you." Jack said. "When I saw that little blond haired, blue eyed girl on the train. It made me stop and think. I was thinking about curly haired blue eyed little ones running through a meadow. I wondered if that was what you looked like when you were that age. I wondered if that was what our little girl would look like."
Jack let go of Elizabeth and got up. He went over to his drawers and pulled out one of his portfolios that he kept his drawing in. He flipped through a bunch of pages until he found the two that he was looking for. He also grabbed an old sketchbook. He brought them back over to the bed.
"Bella." Jack said. "Can you sit up? I want to show you something."
Elizabeth sat up against the headboard. Jack sat down next to her. Jack had his sketchbook and two loose pages. Elizabeth wondered what he was up to, she had never seen that sketchbook before and she could tell that the pictures were older as the edges were worn from being handled.
"I have never shown these to anyone." Jack said. "Wait, that is not true. Bill saw them, but I didn't mean for him to. They got mixed in with something else that I was showing him, but the point is that I have kept these and I wasn't ever sure why. Then I met you."
"What are you talking about?" Elizabeth asked.
"Please just look." Jack said.
Jack handed the drawings to Elizabeth and then flipped open his old sketchbook and showed her another page.
"Wow." Elizabeth said. "You drew me with Little Beth sitting on the steps of a house. Is that me walking with two children in a field? What is this other one?"
Jack moved the picture so Elizabeth could see it better. She looked at it and it sort of looked like her, very pregnant. You couldn't see her face, as it was covered by hair, but she had her hands on her belly and there was a little blond haired girl with her hands on the mother's belly. On the woman's hand were the rings that Jack had given Elizabeth, that is why she thought it was her. She wondered who the little girl was. Mostly Elizabeth was shocked at the drawings. Not only were they very life like, but she felt that she had seen them before, but she knew that she hadn't. She was confused and excited at the same time. She wasn't sure what was going on, but she needed to try and figure it out.
"Look at the dates." Jack said.
Elizabeth looked closer at Jack's signature where he had also dated the drawing. The one of the woman and little girl sitting on the steps was dated June 1907. The one where she was walking with two children in a field was dated August 1907 and the one where with the mother and little girl was dated December 1906. Elizabeth just looked at Jack. She didn't know what to think and it took her a moment to find her voice to ask the question that was on the tip of her tongue.
"Who are these of?" Elizabeth asked. "Because they can't be me. We didn't know each other and you had never met Little Beth."
"They are images that I drew after having a dream." Jack said. "I don't do it often, but when I can't get an image from a dream out of my head, I draw it and it helps me make sense of it. I kept these even though I never thought I would get married and have a family. It was a nice dream to look at once and awhile. Especially when I was feeling lonely. I never knew who the woman was, she was just someone in my dreams. I always felt like the children were mine, even though I had no intention of getting married or having a family. I just never thought it would happen."
Elizabeth looked at Jack stunned.
"You mean that you dreamt of me?" Elizabeth asked.
"I guess." Jack said. "Maybe that was why I was so stunned when you introduced yourself that day in the saloon. I couldn't believe that you were real. I thought I was dreaming again. I think that is also why I got so angry when you told me who you were. I couldn't believe that the woman of my dreams was someone that was so far out of my league. My heart was crushed that day. I think that was why it took me so long to admit my feelings for you. I didn't think that you would ever give me a chance. I was nobody and you could have had any man that you wanted."
Elizabeth sat there for a bit longer looking at the pictures that Jack had drawn several years ago before they had ever met. Elizabeth closed her eyes to stop the tears, but it didn't help. Suddenly it all made sense in her head, but she wasn't sure that she would be able to explain it to Jack.
Jack took the sketchbook and drawing, setting them aside. He then pulled Elizabeth into his arms. He was worried that she was upset and that had been the last thing that he had meant to do with showing her the drawings.
"I didn't mean to upset you." Jack said. "I showed you these because I am trying to explain that I think it was meant to be. You and me and those little girls. Don't you see. You have said that it has felt like we have known each other so much longer than we have."
Elizabeth nodded.
"I think that you are the one that God had always meant for me." Jack said. "And as tragic as it is that Little Beth and Sarah had to lose their father in the way that they did and then to have their mother taken away because of her own actions. But those things opened the door for us to take them in and love them like they were our own. I told you I felt a connection that I couldn't explain when I saw Little Beth. I had the same thoughts for a moment when I saw her, I thought I was dreaming or something because I could have sworn I had seen her before. It wasn't until I was going through some old drawings looking for the house that I had drawn that I came across these. I realized that Little Beth was the little girl from my dreams, years ago. Just as you are the woman of my dreams in more ways than one."
Elizabeth didn't say anything, but held Jack close and continued to cry. Jack rubbed her back and let her cry. After a bit, Jack was starting to get worried.
"Bella." Jack said. "Please say something."
Elizabeth let go of Jack and leaned back.
"Give me a moment." Elizabeth said.
Jack nodded. Elizabeth moved to get out of the bed and Jack let her. She went across the hall to the other room. Jack could hear her digging in the trunk. He didn't know what she was looking for. He also wasn't sure what was going on. He knew that his mother had upset Elizabeth and he wanted to make it right. He was also worried that he had scared her off telling her about his dreams and showing her the pictures. Jack had a knot in the pit of his stomach the longer that Elizabeth was gone. He wondered if everything was falling apart and what he was going to do. He didn't think that Elizabeth would leave him, especially since she was carrying his child, but he wasn't sure that she wanted to be with him as much as before.
Finally, Elizabeth came back into the room and she was carrying what looked like a journal. She was flipping through the pages looking for something. She looked up when she found her page. She wasn't exactly smiling, but she wasn't still crying. Jack was trying to figure out what was going on in her head. He wondered what it was that she had, but he was going to give her a moment to sit on the bed and tell him. He knew that there was still a lot that they needed to talk about and he knew that their time was running short.
"Find what you were looking for?" Jack asked.
"Yes." Elizabeth said. "I wasn't mad. I have just been emotional and when your mother had a tone with me, it was the last straw. I understand that she didn't have the best experiences with people who had a lot of money, but that is no excuse for the way that she spoke."
"No, it is not." Jack said. "I told her as much. I still want to talk about the drawing as well as the letter from Andrew Russell, but I also know that Dee or someone will be here soon."
"I know." Elizabeth said. "When you were talking, I remembered something and was thinking if I had it with me and then I remembered that I did. It took me a little bit to find it, but I did."
It was Jack's turn to look confused. Elizabeth came and sat on the bed next to Jack. She opened her journal and handed it to him. She pointed to what she wanted him to read. Jack wasn't sure, so he looked at Elizabeth and her eyes told him that it was okay. He picked up the journal and found where Elizabeth pointed.
3, January 1907
I am sitting here and I can't get this dream out of my head. I wish Sophie was closer so I could talk to her about it, but she is not. I miss our time together, so the next best thing will have to be to write about it. It was such a vivid dream that I can't stop thinking about it even days later. I have never had a dream that affected me like this. Not only has it stirred emotions that I can't explain but has left me feeling confused. I thought what I dreamed about would never happen. Even at my young age, I had resigned myself that I probably wouldn't marry and have a family as I most men don't want to marry a woman that wants to work and has her own dreams. At least none of the men that my father keeps pushing on me. So here it is, as best as I can I will describe my dream.
I am married to a wonderful man who is full of life. We don't have the fanciest of lives, but we love it. He is the most honest, caring man that I have ever known. He sees me, the real me. In the dream, he is sitting watching me play with our little girl. She is about five years old. She has his blue/green eyes and my curly hair. We are sitting on the porch of this beautiful home in the country. It is late summer and we are enjoying being outside in the cool evening. I look over at him and he smiles at me with those dimples that just make me melt. When he looks at me I feel safe, like never before. I know that he will do anything to protect our little family. I wish I could better describe what I am feeling. It is hard, as this man makes me feel totally safe and yet excited at the same time. This man gives me butterflies and his touch is also calming to me. This is not the first time I have dreamt of this man. I wish I knew what he looked like other than blue eyes(?) and dimples. I have never been able to remember a clear picture of his face. All I know is how he makes me feel. I also know in my heart that I will know this man if and when I meet him because no other man has ever given me butterflies. This man in my dreams stirs feelings inside of me that I can't even explain at the moment. I wish I could, but I don't have the words or experience to describe what I am feeling. … … I want to write more, but I hear Mother calling me. I better go and see what she wants.
Jack looked at Elizabeth and then looked back at the page he had read. He then looked at his sketchbook and flipped to another page. He handed it to Elizabeth and nodded for her to look. When Elizabeth looked at the picture she gasped. It was a drawing of a woman sitting on a front porch with a little curly haired girl and they were playing a game.
"Exactly." Jack said. "See we were meant to be. I also have a very strong feeling that that little girl is Little Beth."
"So do I." Elizabeth said. "How do we explain this?"
"I don't think we can." Jack said. "Other people won't believe us or they won't understand if they do believe us. I think that we just have to do what we feel is right, no matter what other people think."
"Are you sure?" Elizabeth asked.
"The only thing I have been more sure of was marrying you." Jack said. "I can't believe that you had dreams about me."
"I didn't know that they were you." Elizabeth said. "Like I said I could never remember a clear picture of the face in my dreams. I could remember other things, but the biggest thing was the way that I felt. That afternoon in the saloon, not only did I feel butterflies, but I felt something else when we shook hands. I don't know how to describe it."
"Electricity." Jack said. "A bolt of lightning. I can't describe it either."
"You felt it also?" Elizabeth asked.
Jack nodded.
"Why didn't you say anything?" Elizabeth asked.
"I didn't know how." Jack said. "I was also reeling with emotions because I had never felt like that before. Not only was I looking at the woman of my dreams, literally, but I was feeling things I couldn't put into words."
Elizabeth leaned over and gave Jack a kiss. When Elizabeth sat back, she had a smile on her face.
"I love you Jackson Alexander Thornton." Elizabeth said.
"I love you Elizabeth Grace Thatcher Thornton." Jack said.
"So I will write to Andrew and let him know our concerns." Elizabeth said. "I will also tell him about the baby and what we are looking for in help."
"Can I read the letter before you send it?" Jack asked.
"Of course." Elizabeth said. "I know that it won't be easy, but we are together. I also know that other people won't understand, but we will do the best that we can."
"I guess, I better design a second house." Jack said. "I have a feeling that we are going to need it for staff. I never thought that I would have household staff."
"What are you thinking about for staff?" Elizabeth asked.
"I think security at least to start is going to be needed." Jack said. "Especially if we are in the new house with no neighbors right next door. I also think that we are going to need someone to help with the children and around the house."
"Okay." Elizabeth said. "So at least two security guards and a nanny/maid. I think I can handle that. We can always adjust that later."
"I also think that this shows just how much we are going to need a family car." Jack said. "I know that it will be an adjustment, but I also think that it will be needed."
"I agree about the car." Elizabeth said. "It doesn't mean that we still won't go for a ride, but I see what you are thinking."
"One of the things I am also building is a barn with four stalls that can later be expanded." Jack said.
"Good." Elizabeth said.
Jack and Elizabeth continued to talk and make a list of the additional things that they were going to need when they heard footsteps on the stairs.
"Jack." Charlotte called.
"Yes, Ma." Jack said. "Come in."
"Lee is downstairs." Charlotte said as she came to the doorway. "He said he was here to bring you into town before it got too busy."
"Give us a moment and we will be down." Jack said.
"Okay." Charlotte said.
Charlotte turned and headed back downstairs. Jack gathered his drawings and put them away as Elizabeth grabbed the list and set her journal on the nightstand. After they straightened their clothes, they headed downstairs hand in hand.
"Hey Lee." Jack said as he came to the bottom of the steps.
"Hey." Lee said. "It is getting busy in town and with everything going on, I thought it might be better to bring you guys into the cafe now and then you can come out when the cabin gets closer to town."
"Good thinking." Jack said. "Did you let Dee know, he was going to come with the wagon."
"He is busy." Lee said. "I have talked to Bill and he knows."
"Okay." Jack said.
Elizabeth grabbed her shawl and put her shoes on. Jack slipped his boots on as well as a light jacket. Jack also slipped his gun belt on. At the last moment, he also grabbed his ranch hat.
"Ma." Jack said. "Are you coming with us?"
"I will walk into town in a bit." Charlotte said. "I want to put the washboard and tub away. I washed all of my stuff as well as everything that Wynn and Dee left."
"Thank you." Elizabeth said. "You didn't have to do that."
"It is okay." Charlotte said. "See you in a bit."
"Please lock the front door after us." Jack said. "I have the key. You can leave the back door open if you want."
Charlotte nodded. Jack, Elizabeth and Lee went out and Jack waited on the steps until he heard the lock click. He then helped Elizabeth into the car then joined Lee in the front seat. They headed into town. Lee stopped at the cafe and let Jack and Elizabeth out before going to park his car over by the office.
