I open my eyes, and find myself somewhere I wasn't before. Cozy orange light from antique lanterns, well maintained wooden tables, simple but soulful decors you wouldn't find in modern businesses, light steps as the waitress delivers yet another order, people talking to each other and the smell of freshly baked bread. A wonderful sight of a busy medival looking cafe played out in front of me.
"Haaah..." I breathed out. "It worked. How nice..." I slumped down as I made myself comfortable on the table I was sitting in front off. "itworkeditworkeditworked!", was all that I could whisper under my breath. I dragged my fingers on the smooth wood as sweat made it squeak. "Haaahh... It feels gooooodddd... and reaaalll..." And for the first time in years, I felt like I could rest.
"Uhm. Excuse me."
But unfortunately, that was not meant to be. I angled my head to the side and see the waist of the waitress from before now directly in front of me. Her hands held a tray against her skirt.
"For someone who works in a restaurant, you really should eat more."
"... uh, what...?"
"Nothing." I fake a yawn, or try to. I was pretty sure I sounded more like a dying frog or something. "What is it?" I finally turn my head the full way up. Above me was a face weebs would rate . Brown shoulder length hair, tiny little mouth shaped like an 'o' and cute brown eyes staring at me with very visible shock. She wore a handkerchief on her forehead that kept her hair in place. Overall, she looked like a very well done generic tavern girl.
"..."
"...uhh, is there something on my face?"
Her look of shock quickly turns into one of of shame.
"No! No! There's nothing wrong dear costumer. But uh... how should I say this..." She bit her lip, then lowered herself a little. With a low voice, she asked, "D-do you need uhm... medical assistance?"
"Oh..." I haven't looked at myself in the mirror for a while now. Haven't taken a bath or done anything hygienic either. Thankfully I didn't have to move much to get here, but... Meh, I'll just worry about that later.
"Probably not. I'm fine, I'm pretty sure..."
Despite the visible nervousness, she straightened up again. Good girl~ How professional!
"A-anyway sir. Is there anything you'd like to have?" She says.
"Hm... do you have a menu?"
She nods, and with practiced grace she takes out a menu from... somewhere and places it in front of me. I gingerly straighten myself and sit properly, then start to look the menu over.
"Hm..."
... I can't read it...
"Hm..." The poor girl patiently waits as I try to figure a pattern out in the menu. It's structured like the one you'd find in most restaurants, just that it's in another language. The numbers, or prices seemed familiar enough though, despite having the odd protruding stroke here and there.
"hmm... just this is fine." I pointed at the item with the lowest number beside it.
"...just extra spices?"
"...yes, just extra spices, please."
Giving me a strange look that I deserved, the girl nodded and walked off to the counter. I let myself ooze back down to the table and sigh. With pathetic strikes, I hit my front pockets and my shoulder bag. No hard cash or coin in both, of course. I knew where this was going, and I didn't like it. Not that it did anything to help me separate myself from this wonderful table though.
Bliss...
"...sir...?"
"hm...?"
"sir... up!"
"uhp...?"
"Sir, wake up! We're closi-"
I feel something brush up against my shoulder.
Crash
A flash of white, and when my eyes were finally able to adjust, I was staring up to a very surprised girl looking down on me. She tightly gripped her right hand with her left over her chest. Meanwhile, my left side felt both a little numb and prickly. What... happened...?
She was the first to break the staring contest.
"Sir! I'm sorry!"
She moves around the table and hurries over to my side.
Oh. So that's what must've happened.
She was about to kneel and reach over to me when I held out a left hand against her direction.
"Stop. It's alright. I'm fine." I wiggle my raised hand-
An audible snap.
"-ow"
"eek! Si-sir! Your hand just snapped!"
"ehrm..." I grit my teeth as the brief spike of pain passes. "M-my hand's alright! It's just uh... setting into place that's all!" I give her my most confident grin. I try to wave at her with my probably broken hand, but all it did was twitch quite intensely.
The poor girl looked horrified.
"Uh... look, I'll just..." I spit out every phrase as I slowly turn myself over to my now good-not-growing terrific pain side. "stand... on my own... and... uh..." I look down and marvel at how I had managed to lift half my body above the floor and get myself into the 'sexy man' pose. It was a beautiful accident, the left leg I could barely feel over the pain had tensed and was stuck bent under my butt. My left hand rested over my stomach. I wish I had a rose. But I suppose I could improvise.
"Roses like yourself need not to concern over fallen fall leaves like me." I end that with a wink, a finger gun, and my tounge lolling out like a dead fish.
...
Yes. There's something wrong with me. The thudding inside my skull probably isn't my heart. My brain was supposed to be in there, yes?
I watch the poor waitress's face dance from being to worry, to confusion, to blushing, to a look of self inquiry, to embarrassment and anger and back to worry.
"Sir! You clearly need help!" She says as she approaches me again.
"Nonsense!" What is she yapping about? "I feel so light I feel like I can fly!" As I whipped my arms out like a bird, I feel the half of my bofy I just raised slam back down to wooden floor. "Ahck!"
"Sir! Please! Stop moving!" Finally, she reaches me. She crouches and holds me in place, careful to avoid any tender spots. Damn, she's good. "Miss witch! Help!" She shouts... somewhere.
"Ohh... issh... that... the lighttt...? sho... white an... pyurrr..." I mumbled, enjoying the view. The girl looks down at me. I think she was worried, then disgusted. With a quick manuever, the gates to heaven were closed. Oh well, at least I got to see it once before I died. And hey, I think I got a nose bleed. Did I just experience a troupe?
"Narene? What's-? What's going on?!"
Rene? Cute name. All names that sound similar to mine sound cute. My name's Wren-zo~ by the way!
"...this man needs help!"
Help indeeeeddd... I'm sick in le heaaaddd!!
There was a bit of silence after that.
"...clearly. Back off for a moment, please. Let me take a look." said the unseen voice.
Narene leaves. Noooo... the tip of something trianglar pops out from the edge of my vision, but that's all I see.
"... sir can you tell me what your feeling right now...?"
"uh... sahd.. and pain... thisty and... uh.. uh... -UHACK!" And that's all I could say before I everything went black.
"...what a mess. Narene, do you have open rooms?" I scratched my head as the scraggly man on the floor twitches violently. Then stops.
"Ye-yes Miss Witch!"
"Let's go get him there then." With a sigh, I summon my wand and cast a quick wind spell. It was going to be a long night. Is this what I get for wishing for something more eventful to happen...? Sigh...