A/N — Happy 2024! One thing that I struggled with in writing this story was how much the show dragged out the situation between Danny and Kara. I actually find it very OOC for both of them to leave things so very unresolved for so long, but I've tried my best to reconcile it — at least in my own head! I hope that my ramblings are making sense to others as well. xoxo — kals

x

Chapter 18: We've come so far my dear, Look how we've grown

x

Kara sat at the kitchen table, sipping her coffee and wondering if Danny was ever going to move from his position underneath the tree across the street. She saw him for the first time a week ago, the day after their disastrous counseling session with Josh. That time Kara ignored Danny, pretending she hadn't seen him at all. But the next night he was back, as well as the night after that. Two nights ago, Kara snapped on the porch light — a clear invitation — and waited, yet Danny never approached the house. Tonight she had almost crossed the street to ask him what the hell he was doing, but the memories of their fight when she confronted him under that tree kept intruding, stopping Kara in her tracks. Last time, she pushed too hard, said and did things that she immediately regretted — not because they weren't true but because the fight ended up spinning out of control.

She didn't want that to happen again.

Because, as angry as Kara was about Josh and the surprise psychoanalysis, finding out what happened while Danny was in Connecticut had given her pause. She had sensed that the trip to Connecticut would be harder than Danny made out — had even considered telling Reiss to pound sand when he ordered another extension of the cruise — but, in the end, duty won.

The way it always did.

And, as usual, it came at the expense of her family. Worse, when Frankie got hurt, Kara had been completely focused on him and, in the chaos, she wasn't even sure she asked Danny about the trip to Connecticut. Even the morning when she noticed the box of remains on the top shelf of their closet, she hadn't pushed. Instead, she accepted Danny's claim that he wasn't sure where he wanted to bury the ashes as truth, not pushing any harder.

How many chances had she missed to bring this all out in the open and address what happened?

And would that have been enough to make a difference?

The sound of a knock on the kitchen door surprised Kara, her head snapping up as the door began opening, only to relax as she saw Danny. Swallowing a snarky comment about him being tired of hanging out with the trees, Kara held up her mug. "Coffee?"

"With you? Definitely," Danny replied, a bit of the cocky smile she hadn't seen in ages crossing his face as he pulled out the chair across from hers and sat. Danny met her gaze as she handed him a mug. "Have you filed the divorce petition yet?"

She didn't answer immediately, waiting until she was settled back in her chair. She bit down on her lip, then lifted her chin. "Why didn't you tell me about Zack?"

Danny's jaw tightened, but he didn't avoid the question. "I didn't want you to be afraid of me. Afraid that I would do ... what he did."

The thought was so ridiculous that Kara almost snorted before she realized that he actually believed what he was saying. "You seriously thought that I would be scared of you because of something that your brother — a man who I never met, by the way and could be a serial killer for all that I know — did when he was probably completely delusional from the virus?" When Danny didn't answer, merely pressing his lips together in a way that Kara knew meant he was trying not to say something that would lead to a fight, she set her coffee down harder than necessary, spilled some onto the table. "Danny, I'm smaller than 99% of the people I know — friends and enemies. And there are definitely a few I would hesitate to be alone with, even on a ship. But I have never been afraid of you physically. Never."

His jaw seemed to relax, just the tiniest bit, before he nodded. "I'm glad."

"What scares me," Kara continued, ignoring the way his eyes narrowed, "is how easily you pushed me out of your life. And not just me, but Frankie too. How could you do that? Walk away from your own son?"

Danny's eyes closed, and when they reopened, Kara could see the regret, even anguish. But none of that changed the facts. No matter how bad that trip to Connecticut had been, Danny still had a choice. And his choice had been to leave. "I was messed up, Kara."

This time she did snort. "Do you think I didn't know that? All I wanted was for you to admit that you needed help. But when finally did, did you come to me? No. You went to Sasha and Carlton and Wolf. You left me and Frankie behind with a two-line note."

"I..." Danny stopped, his jaw clenching again. "I didn't ask them for help either. The program was the only way Cooper would agree to me rejoining Delta."

Could he be more obtuse?

Kara signed. "I'm so sorry about what happened in Connecticut, Danny. I mean that. I can only imagine how devastated you were when you got the news, and I hate that I wasn't there for you. But none of that changes what happened afterwards, which is that you left me to take care of everything — including our son — alone. How am I supposed to trust that it won't happen again?"

He leaned forward. "It won't happen again, Kara. I promise."

"I want to believe you, Danny. I really do. But this also isn't the first time you've done a cut and run." She stared at him, waiting until he met her eyes, willing him to understand.

"Does that mean I have a chance?"

She could tell that he wasn't listening. Well, listening to the words, yes, but ignoring what she was telling him. "What I'm saying, Danny, is that you've already had your second chance and third chance and hundredth chance. You need to understand that, if you come home, this will be your last chance. And the only reason that you're even getting that is because..." Kara stopped, feeling her throat closing in. She forced the words out. "Because this isn't all on you. I wasn't there when you were in Connecticut, and I wasn't there afterwards. Josh asked if things might have been different if I had known back then and I can't stop wondering..."

"No." Danny's hand shot out to grab hers. "This isn't on you, Kara. I'm not your mother. I don't expect you to follow me around, picking up the pieces again and again." Danny stopped, letting out a snort and, for the first time tonight, Kara thought he might actually understand why she was so upset about what had happened. "I guess I did do that. Leaving you to deal with the house and the bills and Frankie. I never thought about it that way before." He looked up. "I'm sorry."

Pulling back her hand, Kara took a deep breath. "I'm willing to give you one more chance."

"Kara..."

"No." She held up her hand, steeling herself against the relief in his eyes — the hope. "Before you say anything else, you need to really think about what you need to do to get your head on straight. Because if you come home and then leave again, that's it. I'm done. I would never keep Frankie from you but, you and me? Over. So, you need to use this time right now to make sure you are in the right place to work with me so we can figure out how to fix our marriage."

She paused, waiting until Danny nodded slowly before continuing. "You're leaving in three days. I want you to spend that time with Frankie and really think about what you want to do. Once we're all back on US soil, then we can talk. But not until then. Okay?"

Danny nodded, before reaching back across the table to take Kara's hand. "Are you telling me that I need to head back to Carlton's place now?"

"No," Kara whispered, knowing that she didn't have that much willpower. "I'm telling you that, for tonight, I'm done talking."

Danny's lips curled, then he stood, walking around the table. "Fine with me. Although I do have another idea."

With a laugh, Kara let Danny pull her to her feet, following him into their bedroom, wrapping her arms around him and holding him as tightly as she could. Knowing that in this, at least, they communicated perfectly.