HCTB Chapter 21 Apple Picking

Josh sat in the wagon outside the Brides dorm waiting and beginning to regret agreeing to take them to the orchard. He wasn't comfortable around the Brides any more. He knew he shouldn't feel that way, but trust was hard now. Worried he might inadvertently say something that could be taken wrong, or misunderstood, he found just avoiding them altogether was the best thing for him.

Peggy came out and Josh was quick to jump down and help her into the wagon seat next to him. She brought a smile to his face. "Oh I meant to return this to Biddie," he said taking the pie plate down from the wagon.

He met a couple Brides as they came out carrying picnic baskets, and couldn't bring his self to make eye contact, instead he forced a polite smile without really seeing them. He met Biddie and it was different. "I wanted to give this back to you before I forgot," he said. "Thank you for the pie Biddie."

She took the pan, and quickly sat it on the table. All but two Brides were in the wagon when he got back. He helped them up as quickly as he could, before helping Biddie to sit in front next to Peggy..

On the way to the orchard, The Brides were chatting in the back.

"I guess you boys must have really liked my pie!" Biddie exclaimed since Joshua already returned the empty plate.

Joshua just looked and Peggy who couldn't contain her giggle.

"You have no idea," Joshua smiled at his and Peggy's private joke.

"Joshua are you coming to the bazaar next week?" Biddie asked.

"Probably not," he said.

"Why not Josh?" asked Peggy. "It'll be fun."

"Aww come on Joshua you should come," one of the girls from the back of the wagon said.

Josh didn't say anything. Something in him instantly turned off. Peggy saw the change in his demeanor.

He rode the rest of the way in silence, the Brides chatting away behind him unaware of his mood.

When they got to the orchard, Josh jumped down and rushed around to help Biddie and Peggy down first. He went to the back and helped the few girls that still hadn't got down on their own.

The Brides stood around waiting for their baskets while he took them down from the wagon along with two poles that had forked ends.

Once the girls began picking apples, Josh walked to a tree and started pulling the apples out of reach with one of the poles. Peggy watched and picked up the other pole and copied the technique he used.

The Brides were going for the apples on the lower branches until Josh and Peggy felled enough for them to be picked up off the ground. While the Brides picked off the lower branches, Josh and Peggy moved farther away from the others and kept knocking down apples in silence.

"Did I say something to make you mad," she finally stopped and asked, leaning on her pole.

"He stopped and looked at her. "No, why? Do I look mad?" he asked.

"Well, you certainly don't look happy," she said.

"I wasn't aware, sorry…I'll try to smile," he quipped before giving her the tiniest grin.

"Don't knock yourself out on my account," she said and started knocking apples off the tree again.

After a while, he stopped and leaned against one of the trees and watched her knocking down apples, until several of the Brides rushed over and started working on the trees he and Peggy were at. He immediately left and went farther away from them. Peggy noticed and she followed as they continued on in silence until the Brides decided to take a break for lunch.

They spread out some blankets and began to unload their packed lunches. Josh took the apple baskets that the girls had filled and loaded them into the wagon. He took a couple of apples and ate them before continuing to fill baskets.

"Joshua, come and have some lunch," one of the girls shouted.

"I'm good thanks," he said before continuing on.

He felt so uncomfortable, almost like an intruder.

Peggy walked over to him. "Would you please just stop," she said annoyed.

He stopped and looked at her. "What's wrong?" he asked.

"Can we talk?" she asked.

He looked over at the other girls. "Aren't you afraid to be alone with me?" he asked.

She frowned. "Why would you ask me that? I trust you more than anyone," she said. "Remember, we were married?" she smiled. "We've been alone together more than I've ever been alone with anyone else." She said.

Peggy plopped right down under the tree. "Come on sit down, talk to me Joshua," she insisted. "Right here so everyone can see us, just sit here and talk to me."

He sat down and leaned back against the tree. "You're nuts," he smiled. "Okay, what is it you want to talk to me about?" he asked.

"What's wrong Joshua? You're different. It seems like you're always angry." She softly said.

"I'm fine Peggy," he said.

"No Josh. You said you would bring us here, but obviously you didn't want to."

"I didn't want to. If you want the truth," he said.

"Well then why did you?" she asked.

"This morning, when I threw that water on you…you laughed," he grinned.

"I can't remember the last time I laughed," he said shaking his head, a frown starting.

"Oh Joshua, I'm sorry," she said.

"Don't be sorry," he said. I just don't feel comfortable around most of them," he finally admitted, nodding towards the Brides having lunch. "I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings, It's just after Missy and Emily…and thinking of how most of them believed her…I just don't want to risk saying or doing something that may be misunderstood," he said.

"Is that why you never come to town anymore?" she asked.

"I don't know…maybe," he said. " You didn't believe it, or at least I hope you didn't."

"I never did Joshua," she said. "And I'm telling you, not everyone else did either," she said. " I hope you believe me."

He just nodded.

"I am sorry about what happened this morning," he said breaking the awkward silence.

"This morning, before the water…you were arguing about bringing us here weren't you? She asked.

"Jason volunteered me without asking," Joshua said. "I was flat out not going to do it, but then I threw that water on you, and seeing your face," he laughed. "I'm sorry," he laughed again.

"Well I'm glad I could help," she said with a smile.

"Oh, come on now, you know what I mean," he joked.

The Brides started to pack up their lunch. "You missed your lunch," Josh told her.

She grabbed an apple from the basket and took a bite. "No, I didn't," she said covering her apple filled mouth as she spoke."

Josh shook his head and smiled. He grabbed an apple from the bucket, rubbed it on his shirt and took a bite.

Biddie and other girls started filling buckets, leaving Peggy and Josh alone on the other end of the orchard. They finished their apples and tossed the cores away.

Joshua got up, reached down, and pulled Peggy to her feet. They stood face to face only inches apart. He gazed from her bright blue eyes to her moist lips. His heartbeat quickened and suddenly his expression turned dark and he abruptly turned and picked up the half empty basket of apples and carried it to the wagon.

Peggy had to catch her breath. She watched him walking away, and wondered what just happened. She wanted to say something. She wanted to kiss him so badly, but more than anything, she wanted him to want her. She'd loved Joshua from the first moment she saw him in New Bedford. She also knew he wasn't the same. He'd gone through something that changed him and she wondered if he would ever come back from it.

He cursed himself for daring to feel something. He couldn't afford to, not anymore. What was she doing to him? She'd changed from the young naive girl he knew back when they pretended. Not just her appearance, she'd grown up. He had to shake off this feeling. He needed to put some distance between them, if he could just get past today. He wanted them to be friends, but he couldn't chance another failed romance. After Rachel, Valerie and Emily he wouldn't make that mistake again, he decided that loving someone was just too big a risk..