With teary eyes and heavy feet, I dragged myself onwards, uncaring of the many eyes that laid upon me. I rub my eyes with my sleeve, already stained and a mess from moments ago.
I want to disappear.
"...Mystia?"
A familiar voice rings from behind me accompanied by approaching footsteps. A hand places itself on my shoulder and forces me to turn around. The sight of my dear friend does little to alleviate the weight on my mind.
"Mystia!" she exclaims, a face full of worry.
"Kyouko..." I barely manage to reply.
"What's wrong?" she grabs my arm with her other hand, firmly holding me in place "Please...I hate seeing you like this."
"I..."
"...This is about him isn't it?"
I can't bring myself to answer her, but my silence spoke volumes.
"I see...will you be alright?" Kyouko asks.
"Y-Yes I'll-" I wipe away my tears again and look Kyouko in the eyes "I'm going to be okay." It's clear she isn't convinced, but it's enough to deter her from pursuing this further.
"Okay, Mystia." She nods and wraps me in a hug, providing brief comfort in the pit I find myself in. I embrace her in return.
"Thanks, Kyouko."
...
I felt as though I was sinking into the dirt I walked on, step by step. The loud crunching of leaves beneath my feet were my only companion in this solitary trek. As my destination crept into view, I felt no comfort knowing I had returned. I moved up to the door and let myself inside.
I stood by the doorway and lazily shut the door behind me, simply staring off into nothing, as a thought came to mind. My home felt rather empty.
I didn't bother wiping the mud off my shoes nor taking them off before walking further inside, I couldn't be bothered. Down the hall I went, nearly tripping over some of the things left haphazardly lying around the floor and to my room. Moving myself in front of the nightstand by my bed, I hesitantly pull open the drawer and take out a particular necklace, one identical to the one i gave away a year ago. I run my fingers over the feathers on it, their texture having a certain roughness to it from the aged black stains splattered all over them.
A certain pain fills my heart once more, like it had never left my side since that day. I shut my eyes as I let myself be lost again within painful recollection.
The cool water flowed against my legs as I stood lean over its surface, poised for my next catch. Soon enough, another dark silhouette had come close as I locked it in my sight, awaiting it to come closer. Then, just when it was in range, I lunged towards it with both hands, gripping it tightly as I yanked it out of the water. Its wriggling form nearly slips out of my hands and I toss it ashore, where it flails helplessly.
I walk out of the water over to it and stab one of my nails through its head while holding it in my other hand. It struggles for a few moments, spilling blood onto the grass, until it ceases entirely. With a satisfied grin, I remove my nail from its head and toss it into a nearby basket holding a few of its brethren already.
Another fresh lamprey secured for tonight.
Deciding that I've already procured enough ingredients I head over to retrieve my basket when I hear a nearby bush rustling. I glance at it, believing it to be no more than a small animal, and then a man steps out from behind it. Judging by their outfit, they must be someone from the human village, what's a villager like them doing all the way out here? Don't they know it's dangerous?
"Excuse me, you there" his voice pulls me out of my thoughts.
"Yes? What is a human like you doing out on the trail?" I answer him.
"You're one of them, right?"
"...What?" I look at him with a dumbfounded expression.
"A youkai."
"Yes? Is it not obvious?" I gesture to the wings on my back and brandish my bloodstained nail "You really are a fool coming out here, are you deliberately seeking death?"
"I am."
"Y-You…" I'm left speechless at this conversation, it's not as if I hadn't met any humans in the past like him, but this coming from a villager is a first. "What?"
No response. I'm a second away from just flying out of here and leaving him to his fate, then he suddenly gets on his knees, his eyes not leaving me for a moment. Interested to see what he does next, I decided to stay and watch.
"Kill me." The words leave his mouth without hesitation, locking me in place.
"You want me to kill you?" I ask out of morbid curiosity.
"Yes, please kill me" he exposes his neck to me and points to it "Make it quick." He's practically presenting himself to me, I could just do as he asks and jam my nail through his throat right here and now and get it over with already. Yet to my confusion, I feel little to no desire to do so. In fact, I feel a little insulted he feels the need to make it easier for me.
I narrow my eyes at him "Not in the mood, find someone else." With that, I turn heel and begin to head back home.
"Can't even kill a helpless human like me? How shameful miss youkai" he taunts me as leave, which strikes one of my nerves real nicely. I drop the basket in my hand and march over to him, grabbing him by the throat and slamming him down onto his back.
"You really want to die that badly huh?" I glare at him, and he stops struggling, giving me a look of resignation instead as he awaits what comes next. In that moment, it clicks, and my glare fades as I let go of him, leaving him gasping for air as he sits up. He looks at me in bewilderment, and I simply stare back with a blank expression. "Even a youkai like me would take no joy in taking the life of something as pitiful as you" I say to him.
Sure, he would make a fine meal later, but I've already had my fill this week. I have a feeling that shrine maiden would come after me as well for laying a hand on him, it's far too risky.
"Fine then, I'll find one that will" he mutters in a scratchy voice and starts to get onto his feet. Before he can get the chance to leave I grab his arm to hold him in place.
"Wait."
"What now, changed your mind-"
"Tell me your name."
"W-What are you-?"
"Tell me" I grip his arm tighter eliciting a pained grunt from him.
"...Hiroshi."
"Hiroshi, then. You're coming with me" I begin to pull him along by his arm.
"What the hell are you-"
"Stay silent and accept it, haven't you already mentally prepared yourself for anything to happen out here?" he promptly shuts up after I say that.
My mind is racing in panic right now, this is likely a decision I'll come to regret, but I don't know what else I can do. I highly doubt that the hakurei shrine maiden has tabs on every single villager in the human village, but I don't doubt that this guy disappearing will go completely unnoticed. Maybe they'll send a search party out for him, give up on the search, and leave it to that shrine maiden instead, then she'll eventually come after me.
If I let him go, he'll probably get killed by some other youkai on the trail, but in the off chance he doesn't…what will he do then? Will he go back to the village? Spread word of what happened to him when he met me? Considering how he was acting earlier it's likely he won't, but that chance isn't zero and I'm not taking that risk.
Which leaves…hiding him away somewhere. For long enough that everyone that could care about him either gives up or forgets about him. Worst case scenario I can play it off as me looking after him after finding him astray on the trail, I'm sure he wouldn't mind a broken bone or two if it comes to that.
Lastly…well, I'm simply curious as to how someone like him ended up this way.
"...-y…hey!" Hiroshi's voice brings me disrupts my train of thought, and I give him an irritated look.
"What?"
"Where are you taking me?"
"Does it matter?"
"Just tell me."
"...You'll figure out soon enough" I end the conversation with that.
At least, that's what I hoped for, because he kept pestering me with more questions as we continued.
…
The latter half of the return trip was done in silence, Hiroshi decided that trying to get any answers out of me wasn't worth the effort and stayed quiet the rest of the way. We head up to my front door and I drag him inside my home with me.
"Remove your shoes, don't get my floor dirty" I order him as I remove my own. He does as I say without complaint and I continue to pull him with me down the hallway to a door near the end of it. I open it and push Hiroshi inside the room, to which he promptly stumbles over his feet and falls to the floor, he sits up and eyes me indignantly. Not even having the energy left to speak against me anymore.
I kneel down to his level and press the tip of my nail against his throat. "From this point onwards, you're nothing more than cattle. You will remain in this room, at least until I figure out what to do with you. You are not to leave nor act up against me, lest I make your stay here even more miserable. Do you understand?"
No verbal response, just a narrowed stare back at me. Then he sighs deeply, "Fine" is all he says. Satisfied with this response, I stand back up and move back to the door, glancing at him one last time before shutting and locking it. As I step away from it I let out a sigh of my own and hold a hand to my temples as the situation truly begins to sink in for me.
What a hole I've dug myself into.
…
It has been roughly over a week since I've taken in Hiroshi. Ever since I've locked him up in that room, he's become quite tight-lipped. Refusing to say more than a few words at a time whenever I spoke with him. I suppose that's a good thing because I shouldn't be letting myself get attached to him at all but…I still can't help but wonder how he's gotten to this state.
Can't he humor me at least once? Am I asking for too much?
I grip the wooden tray in my hands tighter in frustration, both at how obstinate he was being with me and at the fact that I'm letting myself get this overworked over a human. I click my tongue, and stand in front of the door to where he's being held, opening it and stepping through. I spot him at the other side of the room, gazing out the window intently, exuding a level of concentration I didn't think him to be capable of. I stare at his back quizzically as I step closer to him, placing the tray in my hands on the floor in front of me, which still doesn't evoke any reaction from him.
"Ahem!" I clear my throat loudly to draw his attention.
"What?" he asks in an indifferent tone "I'm busy."
"Doing what exactly?"
"Counting trees."
I'm left perplexed for a brief second hearing such an absurd answer. "...You know, if they're that interesting to look at, wouldn't it be better if-"
"Haah…this again."
"Why you-!"
"Do you really expect me to trust in your word alone? What kind of captor pesters their captive into being let outside?" He retorts and finally turns around to face me. I opened my mouth to answer, yet none came to me, so bit my lip and stared back. "You've been nothing but contradictions ever since I've been stuck in here. Be honest with me, just what do you intend on doing with me? Keeping me in here until I rot?"
"Watch it" I narrow my eyes at him.
"Or what?"
I resist the urge to shut him up in a violent manner and sigh. "Nothing much of note happens out here, you appearing before me is the most interesting thing that's happened this past month. Am I not allowed to let myself be fascinated by something new?"
"That's it? I'm just some momentary distraction for you?"
"Oh fine then, look at it from this angle: you come across a stray wounded wild animal while out on a stroll, wouldn't you feel sorry for it?"
"...So that's how it is."
"Take it however you please."
He gives me that same indifferent look as always and goes back to staring out the window. Feeling my patience nearing its limit, I decide to concede for now and leave the room, taking one last glance at him before shutting the door behind me.
…...
The morning sun shines through the window and onto my face, giving me a rude awakening. I get out of bed, stretching my sore body as I walked over to my kitchen. Looking over my pantries at what ingredients I have set aside for myself, I begin preparing myself a simple breakfast while setting aside a portion for Hiroshi. The fact that making food for him, even if it's the bare minimum, is a part of my daily routine now concerns me a little.
What is he to me now…I doubt humans treat their prisoners as well as I'm treating him. Closer to a pet perhaps? I decide that thinking about it too hard is not worth the energy, but then an idea intrudes my thoughts.
What if I were to…hmm…it's a throwaway idea, but worth a try. Being stuck with nothing to do for a while will drive anyone mad after all.
I head over to the room holding Hiroshi with his meager morning meal and let myself inside. I spot him lying down in the middle of the room staring at the ceiling, he tilts his head up at me when I enter. A silent exchange of glances occurs between us, then I approach him and place the tray in my hands next to him.
Usually, he'd say a word or two in greeting, but he's been rather quiet as of late. I take this as a sign of him growing numb to his current circumstances, which compels me further to try that idea of mine.
"Grown sick of counting trees every day?" I ask him. No response from him to nobody's surprise, but that's not the point here. I continue pressing further "I think I can help with that."
A hint of skepticism creeps onto his blank expression "Decided to get rid of me now, have you?" he questions.
"Nothing of the sort."
"No."
"Come on, not even a smidgen of consideration?"
"None."
"What if I offered a change of scenery?"
"How many times does this make it now?"
"Hold on, I'm not not done yet. A casual chat over tea, but I'll do most of the talking since you're so dead set on being tight-lipped."
He stares back with the same old blank stare as always, but I swear upon the wings on my back that I saw the slightest twitch in his eyes. "I refuse" he answers.
"That's fine, just know the offer still stands." With that, I turn to leave the room without even waiting for a reply, and glance back just as I close the door "I'll be waiting."
…...
"Is the taste to your liking?" I glance over at Hiroshi as I take a sip from my own cup. He continues to stare down at the table, not daring to look anywhere else. Seeing him so anxious and unopposing like this is a fresh sight to behold, enough to elicit the desire to mess with him. But I relent, he may become even more walled off than he already is if I do that. "Loosen up will you? I'm really not planning on doing anything more than this."
He peeks up at me, then down at the tea in front of him. Still nothing. "I didn't put anything bad in it, I promise" I try to reassure him.
"Your word alone holds little weight" he retorts, forcing a sigh out of me.
"Are you like this with everyone you meet?"
"Just you."
My grip on the teacup tightens in annoyance, but I quickly calm myself. Don't do anything rash, or this will all be for nothing.
"Suit yourself then."
An unbearably awkward silence proceeds to fill the room. I already knew he didn't make for good conversation, but only now do I realize that I'm not much better when it comes to him. Then, as if on queue, knocking could be heard from the front door, making me jolt in surprise. Prompting a curious glance from Hiroshi.
"Um, wait right here," I tell him and quickly leave my seat to check the front door.
When I open the door, someone I've been expecting to see sooner or later is on the other side.
"Mystia!" they exclaim.
"K-Kyouko! Um…what brings you here?" I ask nervously.
"I haven't seen you for weeks! You haven't been running the stand at night nor have you come to visit the temple for a while now. I didn't want to bother you but got so worried I came over to check on you myself!" She fumes at me but quickly shifts into concern, which makes me feel guilty. "Are you alright? I didn't do anything to upset you…did I?"
"N-No, that's not it, I've just been um…under the weather lately, so I've been taking it easy at home, haha…"
"Really?" she shoots me a suspicious look "But you seem to be just fine though?"
"It's not a cold I've caught or anything per se…I uh, have been feeling a bit tired lately. Nothing serious."
"Have you gone to Eientei to get it checked?"
"I have, they couldn't find anything off about me, just told me to get rest to see if it helps."
"Uh huh…can I at least come in?"
"Don't you have duties to attend to at the temple?"
"Lady Byakuren saw how worried I was about you and let me take the day off to see you. What, am I not allowed to do that?"
"N-No that's not it, I'm not exactly in the mood to talk right now, sorry. B-But I was planning on running the stall tonight so we can catch up then, okay?"
"Hmm…okay then Mystia. You promise?"
"I promise."
"See you tonight then."
"See you."
I watch her leave before closing the door and letting out a deep sigh, relieving all the tension inside me. She definitely knows something is up, and I feel awful for making her worry and lying to her face.
But how am I meant to even begin to explain what I'm doing?
I head back to my seat and sit down, trying to hide any hint of unease on my face. My return makes Hiroshi look up at me, an ambivalent look in his eyes. "...Friend of yours?" he asked.
"Yeah, is it surprising to you I have any?" I replied.
"No."
"Huh?" I was fully expecting a jab to be taken at me, this response took me by surprise. "Interesting, what makes you say that?"
"...I knew one."
"Oh? And how is that so?"
"My younger brother befriended one."
This is the most open he's been about anything. I stay silent and lean in to listen more, but he doesn't continue. "So-"
"May I please go back now?" he interrupts me, clear discomfort on his face.
"You're really gonna leave me hanging like that?" I ask, but he doesn't answer. Instead, getting up out of his seat and staring back at me expectantly.
"Haah…Fine." I begrudgingly rise as well and lead him back.
The long game it is then.
…...
Lately, I've been having strange thoughts, and on some occasions, quite uncomfortable ones.
Last hunt I…my body felt heavier as I carried the carcass over my shoulder. The blood that dripped down my sleeve made my skin crawl, and I nearly wanted to drop the body and wash myself. Nothing felt right about it all anymore, that feeling of repulsion in the back of my mind at my actions, and the guilt I felt whenever I looked at Hiroshi, it was hard to bear.
Today especially, I took a glance at some of the meat I had leftover for myself, and almost gagged at the thought of what it once belonged to. My mind may be disgusted, yet my body carried on as it always has, the scent remained pleasing and made my mouth water against my own will.
I felt sick.
I don't understand why.
I jus-?!
A loud thud startles me followed by a dull pain on my head. I step back and hold a hand up to it as I realize what just happened. I had bumped into a door with my head down. Specifically, the door hiding away Hiroshi.
Did I unconsciously walk over here?
Deciding not to think further on it, I let myself into the room. As usual, Hiroshi ignored my entry entirely, and I bore my eyes into his back without saying a word. Normally this would go on for about a minute or so before he bothered to say anything to me, but something else takes hold of me.
My eyes wander to the nape of Hiroshi's neck and I freeze up. I try to look away but I find myself unable to tear my eyes off it. A pain arises from my stomach and a faint hiss escapes my throat, prompting Hiroshi to glance over at me, as if to ask me to explain myself.
"What?" is the first word that comes out of my mouth.
"You look pale" he simply comments.
"Does it mat-" I stop myself before finishing that sentence. So I've even begun to adopt his way of speech. "Nothing you need to concern yourself over."
"Mhm."
The pain begins to grow in magnitude and I grit my teeth. Before Hiroshi could say anything more on my odd behavior I turn and leave the room, shutting the door behind me. I feel myself tremble as the pain worsens and I raise my hand up to my mouth, biting down deeply into my thumb in a desperate attempt to ignore it. Soon enough, the pain leaves me, and I lean against the wall in relief. This whole incident however confirms what's been in the back of my mind for the past few weeks.
This can't go on for much longer.
…...
My eyes remained glued to the ground, watching my feet continue to march onwards, the sounds of my companion's steps the being only thing I could focus on. It comes to a sudden stop however, causing me to stop as well.
"You've been awfully quiet" Hiroshi states plainly. Seeing that I wouldn't even answer that, he continues "as of late too, you've been like this, and now, even on this walk that you had suggested-"
"You're quite calm considering you're defenseless out here and I'm always a few steps behind you" I retort, cutting him off.
"I'm long already accustomed to being near youkai, and I know you wouldn't even try anything. Even more so in your current state."
"...Already accustomed huh? What about-"
"Fine, fine. I'll tell you. But first, come closer."
I raise my head in surprise to look at him, and he stares back expectantly. The sight of him alone is enough to set my hunger flaring off again, and I quickly avert my eyes. "W-Why?" I meekly ask. I don't get a response, instead I hear approaching footsteps and spot Hiroshi out of the corner of my eye.
"I don't want the entire forest hearing this."
"I s-see…"
"Look at me."
I shake my head, turning my back to him "j-just say it" I tell him, my voice becoming more subdued. I could feel his eyes dig into my back as I desperately try to ignore my increasingly violent urges. "You can tell me like this can't you?"
"It's rude to not look at someone when they're talking to you."
"That's rich coming from you…Why is it now that you care about such things?"
"Do you want me to tell you or not?"
I dare to glance over, my hands trembling at the sight of him in my peripherals. "I-I'm listening."
Seemingly having given up on me facing him, he sighs and begins to explain. "My younger brother snuck out of the village once, went missing for a few days. I thought him to be dead." I could vaguely see a hint of emotion show on his face. "Then, he returns completely fine a week later. Telling me a friend looked after him out there."
"That being…"
"Yeah, a youkai. A child-like one at that, she was just a bit shorter than him. He got lost in the forest somewhere, and she offered to help lead him back to the village. Anyway, they became good friends after that entire ordeal, meeting in secret every now and then, only to my knowledge."
"I suppose that explains a bit of why you aren't afraid of me. What happened to them?"
He frowns, regret seeping into his eyes. "He snuck out again to meet her one night, without me knowing. Then, the next day…A body is discovered by one of the village's gates. It was him."
"He…" I couldn't bring myself to continue that sentence. "...I'm sorry to hear that."
A dry laugh rattles from him. "You're the last one I'd expect to offer any condolences to me."
I turn my head away from him again. "Heh…you and me both."
"Regardless…Thanks, Mystia."
I could feel my lips curl up into a smile, and I finally decide to face him. "You're welcome."
…...
My arm continues to ache as I leave another deep mark into it, the pain distracting me from the building urges within me. The foul metallic taste of blood filled my mouth, and I spat onto the floor, likely to leave another stain. I hastily wrap the fresh wound with a torn piece of cloth and wear a long sleeved top to hide it, then leave my room.
Heading over to my kitchen, the smell of tea makes its way to me. I take a peek inside, and am greeted with an unexpected sight.
"Good morning, Mystia." Hiroshi greets me, preoccupied with brewing a pot of tea.
"Yeah…morning" I greet back rather awkwardly. "I'll um, prepare us breakfast." I approach the counter next to Hiroshi and begin taking out leftover ingredients from the pantries along with a cutting board and knife. Although, as I lift the knife to chop something, the pain in my arm flares up. I involuntarily let out a quiet hiss as my hand noticeably twitches at the sensation, and feel Hiroshi's eyes land on me.
"What's-"
"I just overworked my hand a little running the stall last night, that's all." I flash him a pained smile and try to get back on task. I nearly flung the knife out of my hand when I feel a hand suddenly grab my wrist.
"Mystia."
"Y-Yes?"
"Do you take me for a fool?"
"What are you-"
"You've done it to yourself again, haven't you?"
I freeze up. How does he know? "So you noticed huh…"
Before I could react, he rolls up my sleeve with his free hand, holding my arm gingerly with his other. He inspects the crude dressing on my arm and I drop the knife in my hand. Our eyes meet, and I can't help but feel something stir within me from the genuine concern I see in them.
"I don't understand why you're doing this, but please stop it." He speaks in an uncharacteristically soft sympathetic tone. "It displeases me."
I bite my lip and look away, unable to bring myself to accept his gesture of kindness. This cannot come to pass, not after what I forced him through, not for what I am. "And why do you care?" I snap back defensively, not even trying to hide the vulnerability in my voice.
"Just as you have been curious about me, I've grown a bit curious about you."
My face twitches. I can't help but crack up a smile. "Pft-..." I stifle a giggle, and I feel warmth in my chest. I slide my hand into the one Hiroshi was gripping my wrist with, and give it a firm squeeze, glancing over at him.
Neither of us said a word, they couldn't express the fragile sense of understanding I felt between us.
In such a fleeting moment, I let go of all those terrible thoughts.
"I'm sorry, for all this, Hiroshi." I say barely above a whisper.
"A bit overdue, but I'll take what I can get." He grins faintly, and lets go of my hand. "Now sit down, I'll handle this." He picks up the knife I dropped.
"But-"
"I'm not asking, sit down and wait."
"...Fine."
Reluctantly, I leave the counter and sit down at the table nearby. To be pitied by a human like this hurts my pride a little…but I suppose this sense of comfort I feel makes up for it. I sigh, and put on a smile, masking the ever-growing craving of my nature.
Perhaps I should let myself enjoy what few peaceful days I have left with him, before the inevitable moment I'm unable to hold up this facade any longer and crack. Because as much as I wish to deny it, I've come to realize what this warmth I feel actually is.
Love.
I love Hiroshi. I can't rationalize it any other way.
Which is why…I have to let him go.
…...
I sit alone in my room, taking a hand at something I wouldn't be doing. The thread in my hand frays once more and I click my tongue in frustration. With enough fiddling around with various threads, I manage to finish my little pet project. I hold it up in front of me for one last final inspection.
A plume of feathers dangles in front of me, held together by a loose thread that looked as if it threatened to snap at a moment's notice. Not exactly the greatest quality but…I'm sure he'll be fine with it. I could make a better one in the future anyways.
With a satisfied grin, I stuff the craft into one of my dress pockets. All that's left is to hand it to him.
I glance out a nearby window. He went out on a walk again, to my annoyance, though I suppose it was a good thing since it let me finish this in secret. He should be fine anyhow, with how long he's been in my home my scent should be all over him, no one would dare lay a finger on him.
Not much to do in the meantime though, I'm not manning the stall tonight. How else to pass the time… Maybe I'll just go out and find him myself, get it over with already. I briskly exit my room and out the front door of my home, an apparent skip in my step. Though, with each step forward, doubts began to flood my mind.
With him out of the picture, will I just…go back to how I was before?
I'll go back to deceiving and killing humans, like I always have.
I'll never feel this agonizing hunger again, like I always have.
I'll relish in the terror my prey feels before I gut them, like I always have.
I'll eat humans, like I always have.
I bite down on my lip until it bled, the pain snapping me out of that downward spiral of thought. Calm down. I at least want this to be a good memory…for both me and him. I wipe the blood from my lip, and continue onward. But as I do, I catch wind of something.
A sickeningly sweet metallic smell. My mind nearly blanks out, and my head spins.
My senses dull and enhance the rapturous scent, and my body falls into a frenzy, my legs frantically moving me in the direction of the source.
Soon enough, I reach it.
My eyes fixate on the sight of flesh. My body trembles, and I ready myself to pounce forward to sink my teeth into such an enticing sight.
I must devour it.
I MUST-
"Mystia!" his voice breaks my trance.
I come to, and the quivering figure of Hiroshi stands before me, a shade of deep scarlet trickling down his arm.
"Hiro…shi?" I mumble through quickened breaths. I stare down at his arm, blood flowed freely from a what I assume to be a bite. I could feel myself drooling at the sight, and I quickly wipe it away as I gather what rationality I had left.
"W-Why are you looking at me like that?"
"T-This is…I…"
"Look, we s-should head back." He takes a step towards me, his intensifying scent setting off my building bloodlust.
"No, w-wait." I hold a hand out to tell him to stop, but he continues.
"What's-"
"DON'T!"
But it was too late.
I lunged forward and sunk my teeth into him.
My vision goes hazy and my senses go numb.
I can no longer hear the screams.
I continue to consume ravenously, shoving chunks into my mouth like a rabid beast.
More.
More.
More.
More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More. More.
Enough.
My mind clears. My hunger satisfied. I sit up, and realized the body beneath me had ceased struggling.
I stare down at the scene before me, at the mess that once was Hiroshi.
My body trembles, I quickly stand up and step away from the gruesome scene. A sudden bout of nausea comes on, and I fall back to my knees, emptying the contents of my stomach onto the grass.
Tears flowed endlessly from my eyes, and I choked on the scent of his remains.
I'm sorry…
I've brought this upon both of us.
I wipe the tears from my eyes, and blink a few times. I find myself standing before a grave, one I was all too familiar with.
Hiroshi…and now Okane…
Was it even worth it trying again with him?
"Haah…I haven't learned a single thing since then."
With those words, I turned and left, never looking back.