Hellooo! This chapter is sort of in a way an AU, but there are only a couple of things different:

1) Jack is not offered Guardianship, he is simply a disposable object that the guardians used

2) Sandy actually dies, he does not come back to life, and the Guardians blame Jack and

3) at the end, everything goes back to the way it was before (i.e Jack goes back to being alone)

Chapter 19: One time too many

Hellooo! This chapter is sort of in a way an AU, but there are only a couple of things different: 1) Jack is not offered Guardianship, he is simply a disposable object that the guardians used 2) Sandy actually dies, he does not come back to life, and the Guardians blame Jack and 3) at the end, everything goes back to the way it was before (i.e Jack goes back to being alone)

There are four things that you cannot get back in life: the word after it is said, an opportunity after it has passed, time after it's gone and trust after it is lost. Once these four things are gone, there is not much that you can do. Whether you want to admit it or not, you are now broken.

You may sit there, hopeless, wondering where you went wrong. You may wallow in self pity and regret, or maybe even anger and hatred. You are not the same person once these doings are done, and your life could quite possibly dramatically change as a result.

For Jack Frost though, these things had passed him by so many times that the misuse of them had become his ordinary. He had been used, abused, condemned to live alone in eternal isolation, hated and even feared because of powers that he had not asked for and a life he did not willingly choose to live.

For him, disappointment was normal. He didn't expect much and he didn't get much. It was his rule: if he didn't hope for good things to happen, then he would not be despondent when nothing good happened. And that's how it usually was: a cycle. Not necessarily of hope and despair, but of a mutual agreement between the two. Over time, this had become second nature to him - no attachments, no feelings, no sentiment

Though to many this may sound like a bleak and dull existence, it was the best way for the lonely winter spirit to cope: no attachment meant no loss and therefore no let downs. No matter how many times you are betrayed and neglected, the hurt does not get any less. Not even for someone who experienced it daily.

So, as any rational person would do, Jack decided to completely give up emotion.

And for countless decades, he stuck by this. Soon, he had almost completely forgot what it felt like to depend on anyone else besides himself. After all that time, the hurt had gone away, until its impact was completely forgotten. In fact, he could not recall the last time he had felt real emotion: not just his façade that got him from place to place, but what it felt like to trust, to love. Though he doubted he had ever known what that was.

That is, until they happened - both a blessing and a form of torture. Just that once, he had gone against all of his rules. He had made an exception for these people, because he didn't think that it would really do any harm. After all, he had been hurt so many times before. If this ended badly, it wouldn't be any different from any of the previous times, right? But his feelings had eventually been numbed, muted. Now he couldn't even remember what it felt like to be hurt, because for so long he had not cared.

And when you don't truly know what you're playing with, emotions can be dangerous.

He had subconsciously allowed himself to get too attached. In just a matter of a few short days, he trusted them like he had never trusted anyone before, yet he didn't know why. Was it because at first they were welcoming, because they didn't immediately throw him to the side, because it seemed like they cared? Or was it simply because, for the first time possibly in his entire existence, he felt like he finally belonged.

It may have just been his mind playing tricks on him after his years of loneliness and solitude, but it somewhat seemed like they actually wanted him there.

Who were these people who he so quickly devoted himself to? They were the Guardians, the protectors of the children, the givers of dreams, hope, wonder and memories. Surprisingly, he found that he didn't care that they had abandoned him for years, left him alone to the terrifying devils and evils of the world. All he cared about was the fact that he was not hated.

Toothianna; the beautiful fairy queen, an infamous sister of flight, E. Aster Bunnymund; the Easter Bunny, bringer of spring and new life, Sanderson Mansnoozie; a powerful being from another planet, the reason children were able to sleep peacefully at night and Nicholas St. North; strong, brave, caring, a total daredevil and (quite literally) the most wonderful man you would ever meet.

In that short amount of time, they had become a family to him and he cherished them with all he had. Every moment he spent with them was better than the last and he was left wondering how he was suddenly so lucky to be able to finally be so blessed in life.

Well, fate could be cruel. And in a mere matter of seconds, his new world had come tumbling down.

One - the heart breaking realisation that they did not actually care, they had only been using him since the very beginning

Two - the disturbing truth that he probably would have been better off to accept Pitch's offer when it had first been proposed to him

Three - the death of Sandy which he would forever hold on his conscience

Four - his trust that would permanently remain broken after he had placed it all in them and they had ruthlessly turned their backs on him without so much as an explanation

Jack had dealt with many losses in his lifetime, but none of them had felt as gut wrenchingly painful as losing these people. Enough was enough - he had broken his own rules one time too many, and now he was paying the price. While the others went back to their perfect lives in their perfect homes with their perfect friends, he was once more sentenced to solitude.

This time would not be like the last and to that he made a promise; he would never let his guard down again, he would never put his faith or trust into anyone besides himself and he would live the remainder of his life, no matter how long it turned out to be, alone.

After all, that was for the best. Sentiment always ended in suffering.

Aw, poor Jack.

Guys, its November now, which means its practically Christmas! Who's excited?!