"Um…" Flamescion tried to converse.
"So uh…" Sirin trailed off not knowing what to say exactly. She had rambled a bit, but Flamescion had stopped her.
"I'm not exactly sure what to say," Flamescion added. "Should I say nice to meet you…or it's nice to see you again?" She pondered.
"Can we…start over?" Sirin questioned.
"Sure…let's go with that," Flamescion said. "So uh…do you want to go first?" She semi-pleaded.
"Well…I'm Sirin Schariac Kaslana and I'm the Herrscher of the Void." Sirin introduced. She slowly held out her hand for the older girl to take.
"I'm Kiana Kaslana, the Herrscher of Flamescion, or I supposed you might know me as K-423, the Second Herrscher of the Void." Flamescion introduced.
"So…about what I said earlier," Sirin muttered.
"Save it." Kiana told her. "I know better than anyone what you've been through, what WE'VE been through. I may not like it, but I understand it." Flamescion told her as she walked over to the younger girl. "As it stands, you are me, and I am you. I've learned to forgive myself for what we did, so I think I can forgive you just the same."
"Are you sure?" Sirin questioned. Her voice was soft and hesitant. "I ruined your life." She whispered.
"It is because of you that I even have a life," Kiana told her. "I've let it go, Sirin, I've taken responsibility for myself and my actions."
"But its because of me, that your life had been so hard," Sirin told her.
"Is that what Void told you?" Flamescion inquired.
"No, she would never tell me that," Sirin answered. "I looked through the memories she had stored in her core. I know what happened to you, to her, what happened when my Herrscher side woke up."
"That wasn't your fault," Kiana told her.
"IT WAS!" Sirin answered. She wasn't blind. She could see it herself. Void had suffered due to the persona of rage and hatred that had formed from Sirin's desire for revenge. Perhaps there were other factors that also played a role, but Sirin knew her desire for vengeance was the biggest factor.
After all, even now she saw it. She had visited the sites herself; she had read the files. She had seen the consequences of her actions firsthand. The destruction she had caused, the loss she inflicted on those that did nothing to her. She remembered it. How could she ever forget?
"There are a lot of kids staying back," Sirin remembered her conversation with one of the groups. "Where are your parents?" She questioned one of the kids. She remembered how their faces dropped as she finished her sentence. She remembered seeing the sorrow in their eyes and hearing the tremble in their voice when they told her they lost them in the Second Eruption.
She looked around, seeing everyone else staring at her. Her words became lost in her own throat as her mind tried to figure out what to say to them. What could she even say? "I did this. It was me. I took them away." So many words rang through her head. She had been back in the labs, only this time, she wasn't one of the kids cowering in the corner. She was the monster that terrified and hurt them.
"Don't lie to me and tell me it's alright," Sirin told Flamescion. "IT CAN NEVER BE ALRIGHT." She insisted.
"All the others tell me it's not my fault. They tell me it was the Honkai, but I know better." Sirin told her. "Void may be denial, but I know you know the truth."
"Sirin," Flamescion whispered as she looked at the girl. She lifted her hands to dry the tears streaking down Sirin's face, but Sirin stopped her.
"Please…tell me…. it's my fault." Sirin whispered. "Tell me, I don't deserve this."
Flamescion didn't respond. She didn't know what she could say to the girl. So she didn't say anything. She stayed quiet and merely held Sirin, as she slowly wept in her arms.
"This is quite the train." Void mused as she floated beside the conductor. Pom-Pom had made a slight fuss about her dragging in space dust, so to avoid any further issues Void just decided to float.
"The Astral Express is the best way to travel." Pom-Pom boasted proudly. "Nothing else can even compete, Pom-Pom makes sure of it."
"So, what do you destroy any rivaling spacecraft?" Void questioned.
"I beg your pardon." Pom-Pom gasped in shock. "Pom-Pom will let you know that they resort to no such acts. The Astral Express is the best because Pom-Pom works hard cleaning and maintaining it, listening to passenger feedback in order to improve."
"Relax, it was just a joke, no need to get your ears in a twist." Void raised her hands up in defense. "Your very big and fluffy ears."
"Pom-Pom does not find your sense of humor funny." The conductor deadpanned. "But Pom-Pom will overlook it since you are a guest, and this is your first time."
"So, who else travels on this train?"
"Whoever needs or wants to," Pom-Pom answered. "Space isn't as restricting as Time is. While Paimon needs to be considerate about who she lets roam around, Pom-Pom can be more lenient. If you wish to take a journey across then by all means, welcome aboard. You just need to be a good person."
"A good person huh? Are cowards good people? What about them?" Void questions. "What if someone was willing to board the train to run away from their problems?"
"Hehe…what do you think?" Pom-Pom questioned.
"I think you and Paimon love being cryptic," Void replied with a light chuckle.
"To run away from one's problems isn't necessarily a bad thing. You face your problems when you are ready and able, to deal with them unprepared whether physically or mentally is nothing short of reckless." Pom-Pom noted.
"And what if you are never ready?" Void questioned. "What if you just keep running forever?
"Can you?" Pom-Pom questioned as he turned to Void.
"Me? I'm not running. I was just asking for a friend, you know Thunder." Void dismissed. "She had some issues recently with her parents, well her other self's parents. I just figured maybe she'd want a break for a while." Void nervously answered.
Pom-Pom remained silent as he eyed Void. His arms were crossed as he listened to her words and played them on repeat.
"No one can run from their problems forever," Pom-Pom answered. "They'll find you no matter where you go in space or time. Even if they never physically reach you, they'll always exist in the back of your mind, waiting."
Void didn't say anything to that. Pom-Pom couldn't blame her. He took a deep breath and then continued.
"The Express takes you from point A to point B. Some may view it as going from place to place, planet to planet, but I like to think of it as something more. We grow whenever we travel. We meet new people, see new places and gain new experiences. We become new versions of ourselves. Sometimes we're better equipped to handle the issues of the past, sometimes we aren't. It's hard to say, but we at least have to try. Right?"
"You're wise for someone who looks like the mascot of a cereal company." Void chuckled lightly.
"Don't tell my passengers. Just like Paimon, I too like my privacy and while I adore them, I'd rather keep this aspect of my life a secret. I don't want them to treat me differently just because." Pom-Pom told her.
"I won't," Void told him before her ears perked up. "Hey, do you hear music?" She questioned.
Pom-Pom lifted up an ear to hear. He listened for a few moments before lowering it. "That's Ms. Serval, she's a regular visitor on the Express." He noted. "If Pom-Pom had to guess, she's probably rehearsing some songs aboard the train." He theorized. "She's a rock star basically."
"You have quite the crew," Void noted.
"When you're a good conductor, it's only natural so many will want to join," Pom-Pom said smugly. "Come on let's head to the main car, that's where most of the crew gathers." He told her.
Void didn't make it far though before Pom-Pom stopped her. "Hold it. Did you wipe your shoes?" Pom-Pom questioned.
"Excuse me?"
"Your shoes, did you wipe them? I can't have you dragging space dust on my good clean floor." Pom-Pom grumbled.
Void rolled her eyes and began to float in the air. "Better?" She questioned. She did not have the patience to deal with that kind of issue. She already got scolded enough by Thunder and Cecilia for this lifetime.
"It will do." Pom-Pom sighed before they continued.
"So she's finally letting it all out." Thunder mused. Flamescion's widened as she heard Mei's voice in her head. "Don't freak out, its just telepathy." Thunder reassured her.
"Oh," Flamescion realized. "So, you heard all that?"
"I didn't need to. In this world, I'm her teacher as well as her big sister. I've noticed stuff like this for a while but approaching them has always been tricky." Thunder explained.
"I can imagine." Kiana thought.
"Our first meeting also wasn't pleasant. Long story short I may have terrorized her into submission during our first encounter so I suspect she might still be reserved around me." Thunder admitted remorsefully.
"And Void?"
"Void is a version of herself that time traveled back because her own time was unpleasant. If you met a future version of yourself that had regrets and time traveled for a better life, would you think the future she had was good or bad?"
"Point taken."
Thunder sighed. "It's funny. Sometimes the person we lie the most to...is ourselves but other times...we are also the same person we're most honest to." Thunder pondered.
"Void and I and Sirin." Flamescion realized.
"Just listen and console her for the time being. It's good for her to finally let it all out. She may act tough at times, but at the end of the day, Sirin is still a kid, a powerful one, but still a traumatized child. She needs people she can open up to."
"I thought she was doing better, here. You know with mom and Bella around to stay with her." Flamescion noted.
"She is getting better." Thunder answered. "However, sometimes having people around isn't enough to remove the pain and guilt, it takes time as well. All things fade under the ravages of time and trauma is not different. Sirin just needs to take things at her own pace, one foot in front of the other, one step at a time." Thunder told her.
"Wise as always Mei-senpai." Flamescion chuckled.
"It's more speaking from experience. Surely you of all people understand this." Thunder corrected.
"That I do," Flamescion answered. "Time heals all wounds and fades all scars."
"You went through a lot." Thunder continued. "Even when you survived, life wasn't easier."
"Somedays I wondered if I should have been alive," Flamescion muttered. "Once upon a time, I had hated the idea of being Sirin's reincarnation. She was a monster in my eyes and the thought of being connected to her disgusted me."
"You were in denial."
"In a sense, I had always thought life was simple. The Honkai was the big bad and the humans were the force of good. As a Kaslana, my duty was to fight the Honkai and defend the humans. It never needed to be more complicated than that. Then things changed."
"You learned you were a Herrscher." Thunder finished.
"Not exactly," Flamescion answered. "In the end, I met you Mei, a human who while inexperienced could direct the power of a Herrscher for the greater good. Perhaps it was my subconscious trying to tell me about my true nature, or perhaps it was me maturing, but meeting you was when the lines started to blur."
"I assume once you learned the truth then everything became a grey mess." Thunder noted.
"Yeah, between Cocolia, Otto, and Kevin, I can't tell which is worse, Humanity or the Honkai."
"The Honkai doesn't lie." Thunder answered. "Well, it doesn't hide its intentions. It's upfront with its goals about destroying humanity and though it's manipulative at times, it doesn't really try even to hide that goal. Unlike humanity who will lie through their teeth, it's honest most times."
"But…."
"And it's not as delusional at times?" Thunder answered as she thought back to WS and Otto.
"Sometimes when you talk…I feel scared." Flamescion told her.
"Ehe…you're going to feel even more terrified in a few minutes." Thunder chuckled nervously.
"Oh yeah…why?"
"I just picked up a strong electrical signature heading this way….its Bella." Thunder explained.
"I don't see why I would worry about that."
"Bella has two passengers on her back."
"Oh….OH!" Flamescion realized.