No Jokes For Hank

One day, Emily was towing Barrington barge. Today, she didn't mind tugging the little barge today. She knew most of the other barges were busy with the other tugboats for the moment, so Barrington was the only one available.

But the cargo that she has to move is very limited due to the size of Barrington. As Emily arrived at her first stop, Hank puffed by. "Hey, Emily!" Hank shouted. "Hello, Hank," replied Emily.

"Guess what?" asked Hank, excitedly. "What?" replied Emily. "I've got a new joke!" answered Hank, "Want to hear it?" "Eh, sure," replied Emily. "Why is there little space in a room?" asked Hank.

"Why?" asked Barrington. "Because there's an elephant in the room!" Hank answered. Emily and Barrington had to laugh at Hank's joke. "Hank!" giggled Emily, "That was hilarious!"

"I know!" giggled Hank, laughing at his own joke. Hank left to move a barge. While Hank shuttled cargo with the barge, Hank told one funny joke after another and everyone laughed at his jokes.

"Hey, Northumberland," Hank called Northumberland, "What did the something called the kettle?" "What?" asked Northumberland. "It called the kettle silver!" chortled Hank. Northumberland laughed so hard that his periscope shook.

"Ha ha ha!" laughed Northumberland and Hank continued on with his work. But Hank continued telling funny jokes. Even George giggled a bit at Hank's jokes. "Theodore!" called Hank.

"What is it?" asked Theodore, after he moved Guysborough. "What?" growled Guysborough. "What lives in a trash can?" asked Hank. "Who?" asked Theodore. "A grouch!" answered Hank, "Of green!" Theodore had to chuckled.

"Ok, Hank," said Theodore, "That's a kind of a funny joke. I think I get it." "I don't get it!" growled Guysborough. Hank left. He continued telling funny jokes everywhere he went until nighttime.

The next morning, the tugboats were given their jobs for the day. Hank was given the job of moving Brunswick barge.

"Will there be a mishap?" asked Brunswick. "Not really," replied Hank, "But you want to hear a funny joke?" "What?" asked Brunswick. "What did the sea cucumber say to the pickle?" asked Hank.

"What?" Brunswick asked. "How green are you today?!" Hank answered! Brunswick laughed. The two set to work. They've spent most of the morning shifting cargo and shuttling steel.

On the way, they've met Carla, the cool cabin cruiser. "Hey, Carla?" Hank called out. "What is it, Honk?" replied Carla. "What did the little boat said to the superliner?" Hank said. "What?" asked Carla. "How super is your day?" laughed Hank.

"Oh, Hank," laughed Carla, "That is so funny!" Carla sped off, laughing so hard that she rocked and rolled back and forth. "This is funny!" Hank said to himself as he continued on with Brunswick.

That afternoon, Hank took a break. He was thinking about more funny jokes to tell. However, he didn't pay any attention to his anchor at all.

Later that day, Hank was assigned to bring in a ship with Foduck. Foduck was waiting for Hank next to the ship named Henry Eben. "Hey, Foduck," Hank said, "Want to hear a joke?"

"Hank, not now," said Foduck, seriously, "We have a job to do now." "Ok," agreed Hank. But he giggled a bit at a joke that he had in mind. The two tugboats began to tow in Henry Eben. But all Hank could think about is making jokes and telling them. No one could imagine what happened next.

They were past Bedford buoy when suddenly, Hank stopped. "Wow!" cried Hank as he felt something tugging him backwards. Foduck continued on, until he felt the ship tugging him back.

"Action!" cried Foduck as he was tugged backwards a bit by the big ship. He immediately untied his towrope and turned back towards the ship. He saw what had happened. "Hank!" called Foduck, "What happened?" "I stopped," replied Hank. Foduck could see why. "Hank!" shouted Foduck, "Your anchor has dropped too low in the water! It's caught onto something!"

"Really?" replied Hank. "Yes!" Foduck responded. Henry Eben was shaken, but unhurt. Emily had to take over for Hank to help bring the ship into the Great Big Harbour.

Northumberland had to remove Hank's anchor from whatever it is caught on. As soon as Hank's anchor was freed, he immediately tucked in his anchor. "There you go," said Northumberland, "You're free."

But Hank didn't feel happy about what had happened. So he headed home back to the Great Ocean Dock, not feeling happy at all. "I was thinking so much about the jokes I want to make, that I forgot all about my anchor," thought Hank, "I would have done a great job. And I call myself an official ocean tug. I'm a fool."

Hank shut his engine off and just floated at his dock, silently. The Dispatcher turned to Hank. "Hank," he said, "Why aren't you out working with the others?" "Forget it," replied Hank in a sad tone of voice, "Who wants a fool like me working?"

"Hmm," thought The Dispatcher as he turned away from Hank. By nighttime, the other tugboats returned from their jobs. Then they saw Hank. "Uh, Hank?" asked Foduck.

"Go away," replied Hank, "You don't need a joke-telling fool to work with you at all." "Hank?" said Theodore, "What's going on?" "I was too busy thinking about making jokes that I'd forgot to tuck in my anchor," replied Hank, sadly.

"Hank," said Foduck, "I didn't mean to yell at you. I'm sorry. I was just upset about what happened." "It was my fault!" burst out Hank, "Because I was more interested in telling jokes!"

"Hank," said Theodore, "We love it when you tell jokes." "Yeah," replied Hank, "Well, from now on, I'm not making any more jokes! Forever!" Everyone gasped. "Hank," said Emily, concerned, "Why?"

"I am now an ocean tug," said Hank, "Not a fool." "Hank," said Foduck, "You don't have to do this. You are Hank. You're not a fool." "Exactly!" agreed Hank, "I've made my decision. No more jokes."

"But your jokes makes who you are," said Emily, "Do you want to throw that away?" Hank thought about it for a moment. "If you stop telling jokes," Theodore said, "You wouldn't be Hank anymore."

Hank thought about it for a moment. Actually, he thought about it for the rest of the night. The other tugboats settled in for the night while Hank continued thinking about it.

The next morning all of the tugboats woke up. All, except Hank. But later, Hank did woke up. For a few minutes, there was silence. The other tugboats held their breath.

Then, Hank finally said, "Knock, knock." "Who's there?" asked Foduck. "Orange?" Hank said. "Orange who?" asked Emily. "Orange you glad I'd never said 'banana'?" Hank laughed.

All the other tugboats laughed, too. "Hank!" smiled Theodore, "You're you again!" "Of course!" chuckled Hank, "I could never be someone else other than myself!" "We're glad that you're back to normal," smiled Foduck.

"Thank you, everyone!" said Hank, "I'm glad to be Hank!" "That's good!" smiled Emily. "We're glad that you're feeling better now, Hank," said Theodore. "But Foduck," said Hank, changing his mood, "Sorry about what happened yesterday.

"I forgive you," replied Foduck. "I'm ready to start work now!" said Hank. "But it's still 6:00 a.m. in the morning," said Emily. "Then we'll wait!" replied Hank. So they did. 2 hours later, the tugboats were set to work. Hank helped Foduck to bring in the container ship, Jennifer.

This time, nothing went wrong. "Good job," said Foduck as they've finished. "Thanks," smiled Hank, "But I'd better make a schedule for my joke telling."