Authors Note: I own nothing. No ownership rights to Beverly Hills 90210.
Chapter Fourteen: Visits
The first house has the space I wanted and a good backyard for Art but there is something about it that just seems cold, Brenda feels it too. Her eyes haven't twinkled and while she has respectfully smiled and faked interest at the different features the agent has been pointing out she is simply being polite. The second house is in the Bird Streets, it's a 1950s home with views across the city. It's listed near the top end of our budget but when Bren and I walk in we both are in love. It has been renovated so there is one big room with natural light shining in, the realestate said the contractor who did the renovation was trying a new design style called open plan living. If we were concerned about the kitchen being on display though we could rebuild the wall he had taken out and remove the island, Bren immediately vetoed that option. She liked the idea that Art could be playing while still being watched as she (she corrected it to me after her Freudian slip) made dinner. Her verbal stumble told me she was picturing living in this house together. By the end of the tour we had seen all five bedrooms of the main house, the study slash library, the four bathrooms and the den. The pool and garden were amazing, and the little hidden music studio that had been built on the property by a previous owner had been renovated into a small private guest house in the trees. My mother would love the illusion that she was surrounded by nature.
When we got back in the car Bren raised the only point against the house, it was not by the beach. I hadn't considered it. There were some brochures for properties in Malibu but while they were on the beach they were too small, and some were nothing more than shacks. They were very affordable because you were essentially buying only the land value. They would be perfect as a tiny rustic weekender or you could knock the shack down and build a big home or potentially two. It placed a thought in my head, we could afford to buy both especially if the agent was able to get the deal she thought she could; while we loved the open plan it seemed too modern for many buyers who didn't want company seeing their kitchens or more likely the Beverly Hills elite didn't want their help on display. If we bought both we could split the block in Malibu and build two homes, I could sell the second and the profits would cover or almost cover the expense of the purchase and build. We may not recoup all the costs of the build on our place but we'd still own a property down by the beach fifty minutes away that had improved significantly in value. It would be the perfect spot for summer break and for weekends out of the city.
When I told Brenda my idea she smiled and teased, asking if I was considering becoming a property developer, I kind of realised I wanted to. After my Dad's history investing in shares always seemed like a risk, Jim was currently taking care of that but even then he invested more in private equity finance rather than open market. It allowed him to feel confident that he knew all aspects of the deal and the person who he would be giving his clients money to. It was working well currently and he had successfully increased my financial worth both in the trust and in our new arrangement, but I didn't want to leave my family's financial future to him alone. My degree would give me the skills in writing to hopefully make a career out of that but how many writers had planned to write the next great American novel or a successful screenplay and have never been successful? Building a property portfolio and developing properties for immediate sale felt more secure to me, and would give me the flexibility of not working a nine to five allowing me to pursue my writing and be there for Art and any future kids, especially if Brenda was successful in her acting career.
By the time we are arriving home I am excited it was the first time I felt like I had a clear direction on how I could lead our family's financial security. If I could make it work without impacting the portfolio that Jim managed it would be even better, I wanted this to be my success in a way to prove to him and me that he wasn't needed. Once Bren had put Art down for his mid morning nap I was already drawing up ideas for the Malibu shack and had already called the agent to set up a viewing for tomorrow morning. When she came over to the dining table to see what I was doing she raised her eyebrow, "you're serious?"
"Yeah I am. I'm thinking if it works I could do a few a year keep some as rental investments paying themselves off and sell others. With your and my career plans being more creative we may never have regular income streams this would allow us to not live off the profits your Dad generates for us. We could build something bigger for our grandkids and great-grandkids while still keeping the portfolio."
"And it would mean you wouldn't be reliant on my Dad."
I hope she didn't take this as a lack of appreciation for her Dad's work. "You understand why?"
She squeezed my hand, "I do, and I know last night I was in shock but I want you to know that I will be discussing this with my parents-"
That was the last thing I wanted, I didn't want world war three and I didn't want her and Art in the middle. "Bren there is no need."
"I'm sorry no need?" Shit, by her tone it was clear she was offended.
Using a calm and reasoned tone I stand and move closer to her trying to explain, "look it's between your father and -"
She steps back. "You finish that sentence and we are going to have a problem, there is no way that vile threat was just for you. My whole value system has been on the line since we began dating, from the get go, hell even when Brandon was sick that night and couldn't join us for the movie he has feared that part of our relationship and nothing had even happened between us. He has refused to see it as a choice I could make or was entitled to make, like he had a right to have a say. Brandon could do whoever he wanted me they had to have my father's approval first. He crossed the line with that accusation, he knows what I heard on that teen helpline. I have heard people we both know describe their horrific experiences of physical actions being forced upon them. To brush that over our eighteen month relationship at the that had been respectful, kind and serious is beyond unacceptable."
My annoyance was stirred not by her anger but because it was the second time she had discussed this and had refused to describe our relationship using the word love. Last night it had been 'how together we were' and now it was 'respectful, kind and serious'. On the phone from the hospital it had been I had cared in January but at least she had acknowledged that I had loved her when we were together, it now seemed even that confirmation was eroding.
"Yes it is a disgusting accusation to make against two people so IN LOVE with each other." She darts her eyes away.
As I approach her she turns her back and softens her tone, "whatever we were, may have pretended to be it wasn't okay for him to do that."
I move in front of her and place my hands on her shoulders and whisper. "Were. Pretended. Are you serious right now?"
She doesn't answer. As we are staring the other down there is a knock on the door, I grumble and reach behind me. We had moved close to the door in our argument.
Refusing to drop her eyes I snap at the intruder, "what?"
"Well hello to you to son." Fuck, I close my eyes and then turn plastering an apologetic look on my face.
"Sorry Mum, come on in." I move away from the door to let her in.
She notices the tension between us. "Am I interrupting something?"
Bren and I respond at the same time. "Yes." "No, your son is just being an idiot trying to keep me out of something that is clearly my business as well."
"Brenda can we talk about this later?" We renew our stare down but in mere moments she surrenders for the time being, her good manners kicking in.
She looks at my mother. "Hi Iris." She moves to hug her. "Sorry about this."
"Teething issues living together, is my son still struggling to adjust to a life without turndown service?"
"No that's fine, he's actually pretty neat now though I think he is nervous that if he's not I'll jump in and do it." I come up and wrap my arm around her shoulder, she tenses but doesn't move it off.
"That's because you should and you are very much suppose to be taking it easy, like laying on the couch easy and not getting worked up." I smile at my Mum. "You're here early, let me guess you wanted to surprise me?"
"It's half the fun darling." I shake my head at her.
"Your grandson is down for his mid morning nap but if you want you can come into our room and see him." My mother gives me a curious look at the our room remark and then begins to smile. "Come on." Brenda and I lead her into the room and as she looks down at the crib she grabs her heart.
"Oh my, he's perfect. He looks exactly like you Dylan."
"He has his mother's beautiful blue eyes though."
"That's all I got." I kiss her head.
"I'm sure our daughter's will look exactly like you." She shakes her head and looks at my mother's shocked but pleased face.
"Ignore your son, he doesn't understand that best friends don't usually procreate."
"Oh believe me I understand that, I just hope that temporary title will transform into a few other's soon."
She looks up at me and smiles. "Acquaintance?" She's a smartarse.
"Funny."
"Associate?"
"You going to go in alphabetical order? Because I can save you time and say skip to F and then W."
"Fellow and Workmate?"
My mother hasn't stopped smiling since she came in the room and laughs slightly.
"Nice to see you have got over your disagreement."
"We haven't, I have just got very good at compartmentalising-"
"Too good."
She ignores my remark. "Let's leave him to sleep and we can go catchup, would you like tea Iris?"
"That would be wonderful darling." As we move back into the living room I tell my Mum and Bren to go sit down, that I'll make the tea. While I'm doing it the phone rings and I pick it up and chat to Suzanne.
Bringing the tea out I move to sit next to Brenda and lean close to her. After two nights in my arms I've become addicted to the buzz I get when her skin and mine touch. The electric current that passes between us enticing me for more.
"Are you okay if Erica sleeps the night?"
She gives me worried eyes. "Of course, everything okay?"
"Yeah. When we were at The Pit yesterday Nat was saying he is lost with Nadeen in Mexico and can't find anyone to replace her. Suzanne told him she had waitress experience and he gave her a trial run this morning. It must have gone well as she is down for a shift tonight and tomorrow morning. Erica sat at the counter during the trial run but she doesn't want her there for so many hours and out so late."
"Understandably. Is Suzanne dropping her over here or are you going to go grab her?"
"I said I'd go collect her in a couple of hours, it will give Suzanne some time to relax before her shift."
"Oh so I get to meet Erica as well today that's great." From my mum's tone I can tell she was a little hesitant, she was always weary of strangers. After catching up with Mum about Hawaii, we began explaining the house we saw today, and how we were considering putting in an offer; Brenda kept changing the we's to my name, though I kept reminding her that she would be staying there three nights a week as well so it would be a we purchase. My Mum found the back and forth on our relationship status amusing, picking up that Brenda was believing we weren't together while I was starting to see us as together without the name and with limitations on our physical intimacy.
It was a position I would be content with until I had a chance to explain everything to her, though I wasn't okay with her rewriting our story, our history while I waited. I could do without the title and with clear physical boundaries for the time being as I wanted her knowing everything first. I wouldn't risk Kelly throwing another grenade at us in an attempt to break us apart when Bren had finally opened up to me again. Her being blindsided again, being made to feel like she didn't know me was not something I would let her experience from the blonde for a third time. Until Brenda was ready to hear everything I would be keeping a close watch on Kelly around her and I wouldn't rock the boat with her malicious ex-best friend in fear of setting her off.
When Art stirred I quickly rushed to go get him, hearing Brenda tell my mum as I left the room that I was amazing with him. It was my favourite complement to hear from her lips. After a quick diaper change I brought out Art to meet his grandma Iris, she was hooked and Art was instantly taken with the many necklaces she wore around her neck. As the two got to know each other I collected the camera and took some pictures. There had been a couple of me growing up around the places we owned but as we continued to move and I got older Jack stopped displaying them; I wanted my son's home to be full of albums and photos reaffirming how much he is loved and wanted.
A little over fifteen minutes later Art began craving his own space, Iris was disappointed but we advised she held third place on the holding list. Once he was put into his bouncer my mother moved to the floor to continue to dangle her necklace above his hands. Every time he caught it he would gurgle in delight. It was during that time Iris asked after Cindy and then Jim. Her comment of I can't imagine he has taken the changes well, led Brenda into a rant of not caring.
Iris' curiosity was peaked and after some back and forth my silent disagreement on her staying out of the matter was no longer silent and relegated to later. It resulted in my mother being informed of the whole story about how I had ended up being an accomplice in sending Brenda to Paris. The two of them were furious and every time I advised them that it was between Jim and I their wrath would be aimed at me. Brenda believing her father had crossed so many moral lines in his desperate desire to end a relationship that she sarcastically referenced as being so bad that she had missed curfew a couple of times and had been bold enough to go away overnight on a trip they had originally approved of. If he went that crazy threatening made up charges over such offences then he needed to learn fucking perspective. My mother was furious at the breach of trust she had given him and the legal breach he had made on that trust; my mother may be a hippie but she was shrewd enough to be with Jack for nearly ten years she knew Jim had broken his contract with her.
Nothing I did could get either of them to backdown so I tried my last resort, he was staying out of mine and Brenda's relationship because of the subtle threat of exposure of this secret. He knew that he had crossed the line. Them not interfering would allow that truce to hold a while longer, I was no longer naïve enough to believe it was a permanent ceasefire, but it could hold until Bren's health has improved, I didn't add it could also hold until she had officially taken me back. On that point they paused and began to see some benefits of staying out of it, though I wasn't convinced either would hold their tongue forever.
By the time Art was down for his nap and I had put together lunch for all of us they were a little calmer, as I went to go collect Erica Brenda was just finishing off the story of Art's birth. When I got back in a half an hour later I knew they hadn't stayed on that topic both from Brenda's red eyes and my mother's comforting embrace of her. As Erica leapt into Bren's arms effectively making the McKay women by default snuggle together I wasn't sure if my mother had helped my cause or hindered it.
"Hello Sweetheart I have missed you." She hugged my sister tightly.
"I've missed you too, it's lonely at the apartment."
"Well I'm sure after all the noise of Art and your brother it would be quiet." She moves a piece of my sister's wavy hair behind her ear. "Now let me introduce you to Dylan's mum and Arthur's grandmother, Erica this is Iris McKay. Iris this is Miss Erica Steele though she does also like being known as a McKay girl."
The warm smile my mother has been giving Erica since she ran in and moved immediately to Brenda became one of confusion. "A McKay girl?"
Erica loving any opportunity to explain something responded, "Dylan say's you, me and Brenda are the McKay girls. Brenda say's you would be happy that the McKay women are growing in numbers and you aren't alone anymore in a family full of boy's." My mother who had been listening intently had rubbed Brenda's hair at her being referred to as a McKay, she smiled at my sister.
"Brenda is right, as she knows I've always thought of her as a daughter, and now we get to welcome you into the family." My mother looks at me, "Dylan it seems you are outnumbered."
I move to sit on the coffee table, "that's okay as Erica will always side with me, right?" I give her a tickle.
She laughs, "no I side with Brenda." Brenda at that hits away my hands and squeezes my sister tight defending her ally. I give my sister a mock hurt look, "sorry but she knows how to do the good braids and watches my favourite show with me, and actually knows the characters." Oh the important things, Brenda whose eyes have lost their post cry appearance is trying to hold in her laughter finding Erica's reasoning hilarious.
As I go to defend myself Art wakes from his midday sleep. I shake my head and declare as I leave the room I'm going to pick up at least one McKay who likes me more. Brenda yells to me to keep living in that delusion. Her case is won when Art who hasn't seen Erica since Thursday night wants to sit with her. Brenda gets the pillows set and I deposit my son into my sister's arms, shaking my head in mock hurt. I grab the camera again and take pictures of them altogether. Brenda insists on taking over so I can be in a McKay family photo.
The afternoon wears on with Art having tummy time on the floor with Iris and Erica, and Brenda resting on the couch. When the winter chill starts coming in I make a fire and then move to massage Brenda's feet while we discuss dinner options. Brenda insists on making dinner and then sends me to the organic grocers to purchase the items needed for a roast chicken meal. When I arrive home the McKay woman are listening to music sitting around the dinner table. Erica on seeing me runs to hide her and Brenda's secret project that she must have been showing my mother, all of them look to be having tea or hot chocolate in Erica's case. Art is in his mother's arms watching the room and gurgling along. It's a great scene one that I never imagined I would get to experience.
My mother plays a board game with Erica while Art in his bouncer watches on as Brenda and I prepare dinner, though when one of Brenda's favourite songs comes on the radio I put down the vegetables I was cutting and insist she dance with me. By the end of the song we are laughing like we did in Baja and as usual have spent part of the song dancing properly and the other half goofing off with the other. When the song ends we are met with a round of applause and Erica with the camera securely around her neck. I can't wait to see those photos developed.
Once dinner is over and Art is tucked into bed, we watch a movie with Erica. When it's over and she has given a big hug to Iris, she insists on both Brenda and I tucking her in. It's clear she has missed us both. The McKay women who are still up, have another cup of tea as they go through recent pictures taken since New Year's, it seems like every few day's we are getting more rolls of film developed. When Brenda yawns for the second time in five minutes, I insist on her going to sleep my mother will be staying a while so she will have plenty of time to catch up. Brenda reluctantly agrees though arranges for Iris to come to breakfast tomorrow, she has decided that a beach breakfast is needed especially as she hasn't seen the ocean since before she left for Minnesota and Art has never been to the beach. She also thinks after weeks of focusing on family that I need to go out and catch some waves. We need to be in Malibu to view the property so it makes sense to make a morning out of it. Iris loves the idea.
When I pull up outside the hotel to drop my mother off she turns to me, I can tell this isn't going to be a quick goodbye so I switch the car off. "Your energy is completely different, you are happier than I have ever seen you. When I first met Brenda her guard was way up, she has always wanted to protect you and she didn't trust my intentions. When she lowered it I finally saw the bond between you both. You were made for each other, you are supposed to have a long life together." She sighs. "When I visited her last February she was broken, I told her that it was a blip a mere moment in your life together, but even then she wasn't sure she could trust that. Whatever has taken place between you both her love for you is still there, though she doesn't believe yours is in the same way." I go to protest but my mother puts her hand up. "Anyone with eyes can see it, it radiates off you but she sees it as the love you have for your family, the love you have for her being the mother of your son. She knows you love her in a romantic way as well but she thinks that it's fleeting, not deep, that it's just residual love left over from being your first girlfriend, that when someone better comes along you'll be out the door again."
Iris' voice gets stern, "whatever you did these last eighteen months you have made a mess of it, she has no faith in your feelings for her. Calling her speaking of your love while still sleeping with Kelly, telling Kelly you have always wanted her, messing around on her that summer, making her believe she was completely at fault for breaking up with you, never being honest, and then to destroy her in that park with that girl beside you. It screams Jack McKay, ruthless, uncaring and selfish."
She takes a calming breath. "Your father and I loved each other once, I was willing to change myself to fit into his world and at first he was willing to meet me halfway. I loved him deeply, and by the end of our marriage I couldn't stand him. He had destroyed my faith in love, in men, in relationships, he made me doubt my judgment, my ability and my strength. I haven't been in a serious relationship since, and I'm fine with that I have made peace with it not being my path." She grabbed hold of one the crystals around her neck, it was the only tell that she was till carrying the scars of the end of her marriage the scars of my dad's treatment. I didn't doubt what she said I had been raised by the man he was able to get to you because he could identify your weakness and that was where he would aim his blow.
"Tread carefully with her. I love you and I love her, I love you both together. I want my grandson and Erica exposed to true love in real life, know what it looks like to love someone so completely. But tread carefully, she's a Scorpio they have a thick outer shell, if she puts it up between you and her I don't think there will be anything you can do then to convince her." My mother squeezes my hand and then exits the car leaving me to my thoughts.
She told me nothing I didn't already know about Brenda and I, she told me more than I knew about her and my dad. I didn't know if they had a connection like ours but it was clear she loved him and he had destroyed her to the point she wasn't strong enough to fight him for me. I didn't think I was capable of my dad's level of destruction but then again eighteen months ago I didn't give a shit about Kelly. I wouldn't of dreamed of having a fling on Brenda, not choosing her in every situation over every person, and I had believed I was a good man who never lied.
It left me wondering if Brenda saw me like Jack a cheat, liar and scammer, only out for himself. He had died looking for redemption but it didn't wipe the slate clean, he had ruined the people who had loved him the most.