Chapter 70 - Concession
After combing his study for bugs and finding none that he didn't place himself, Lex leaned back in the chair at his desk, swirling at the tumbler in his hand. He had known for a while that he wasn't going to be able to save Ryan before his illness took him. He hadn't necessarily counted on his father taking Ryan's life first.
Lex wasn't sure exactly how his father was getting in and out of the mansion unnoticed. He suspected it was some combination of paying off—and possibly threatening—mansion employees, and hiring people to hack into security cameras. It didn't really matter how he was doing it. The important thing was that he was unstoppable.
It didn't catch Lex off guard when Clark came in to accuse him of threatening Ryan. So far, his father's plans had been fairly clear, as every act of sabotage held a clear purpose: to cut Lex off from every individual who cared about him and respected him. For most, this meant safety incidents at the plant would be enough. A few would take more targeted efforts.
Ryan would have been a tough one to convince, because he could read minds. But he was still a child, and he wouldn't know what to do about it if Lex's father came along and threatened to kill everyone he cared about if he didn't speak poorly of Lex. Ryan would simply cave. He wouldn't even put up a fight. For him, there was no competition between saving the lives of the people he cared about and damaging his own relationships by lying. Lex suspected Ryan might even have tried to get the truth to Clark somehow, but of course, Clark hadn't picked it up.
And of course, that was the part that stung. Clark's trust was so unstable it could be broken in an instant. It was days like today that Lex had a really hard time respecting Jonathan Kent.
Then again, the Kents had a point. They always had. The Luther world was dangerous. It would've been easy, so easy, for Lex to convince Clark of his own innocence, but Clark would be the next target if he stuck around. Lex already would never forgive himself for Ryan. He couldn't imagine how his nightmares would haunt him if he let anything happen to Clark.
It was less than an hour after Clark had left that Pamela came into the study. He sat down his drink when she did. It was almost reflex—she didn't like it when he drank a lot.
She gave him a knowing little smile. "That must've been hard," she said.
"I can only imagine what you're talking about."
"You did the right thing, Lex."
"I've lost everything thanks to that bastard."
"Not everything. Clark will come around."
Lex stood from his chair, beginning to pace. "After all the time we spent together, after months of coaching and training, Clark didn't even bother to x-ray the room for cameras."
"He's fifteen, Alexander. And he just watched his friend die."
"So did I."
"And you could have convinced him you were innocent."
"You know it's better if my father thinks he's won this one one." Lex shook his head, looking out of the window. "I get sick of this, you know."
"Sick of what?"
"The Kents. Their prejudice."
"You know Clark wasn't trying to be prejudiced."
"He doesn't have to try."
"Your father knows that losing Clark would be the most painful thing you could go through."
"Second to losing you."
She gave him a sad smile. "No. I'm not here forever. But you two, I think you'll be friends for life. You're going to change the world together."
Lex looked down, smiling a little despite himself. He had once believe that. He wanted to believe it still. "I just wish I could figure out how my father's doing it."
"He had this mansion built from the ground up. I'm sure he knows it better than you do."
"Shipped brick by brick from Scotland. Just because he could." Lex rolled his eyes. "You know what he could've done with all that money?"
"Advance your research a bit. Saved a lot of lives."
"Now I'm thinking like a Kent."
She chuckled. "I don't think they think like that. They don't know what money is worth."
"Then who am I thinking like?"
She hesitated for a moment. "You," she said.
He let his breath out. "What did Clark say to you?"
"Everything you expect. That the town is right, that you killed Ryan."
"I might as well have. I couldn't save him."
"He didn't have long. And Clark never would've blamed you for that."
"I know." Lex hung his head. "I know."
It was silent for a long moment, before Pamela came over and took his hand. "I don't think you're going to have to convince Clark that you're innocent."
Lex raised his eyebrows.
"Give it a couple of days, I think he'll figure it out himself."
"And then my father will just do something worse to try to shatter my name in his eyes."
"That's probably true."
"What do you think I should do? Should I actually do something evil?" He smirked.
She let go of his hand and gave him a chiding look. "I think you should probably make yourself scarce for a little while."
"You should, too."
She nodded. "These have been good months, Alexander. Some of the best of my life."
"Don't talk like that. We'll see each other again, I'm going to save you."
"You need to let your research lapse."
"No."
"Alexander —"
"I'm not letting anyone else die because of my fight!"
"Ryan would have —"
"He would have lived if I had poured more into this research! The only reason I couldn't was because I had to keep it small enough to be undetected, because of my father! But I'm not losing anyone else to him, I'm not—"
"It's not your fault—"
"I could've saved him, Pamela." Lex pulled away from her, facing the wall. His voice came in softer the second time: "I didn't have to lose him."
It was silent for a long long moment.
Lex hung his head, and blinked a few times. God knew Pamela had seen him cry enough in his lifetime, but for some reason, he didn't wanna lose it right now. If it was just about Ryan, he might have. What kind of selfish, heartless bastard was he that losing Clark's friendship hurt more?
A moment later, a warm hand came to rest on his back. "Alexander," Pamela said softly, "I meant what I said earlier about you and Clark. I think you're going to change the world someday, I really do. And I think you're a great mentor for him, a good big brother."
Lex swallowed hard.
"But… when you figure out how to defeat your father and all of this, and you come back to the plant and resume your research and restart your life, I really think you should make some friends your own age. It's not… It's just, you put so much stock in the opinion of a teenager, and..."
Lex felt his cheeks grow warm at that. It wasn't even just Clark. Watching Clark interact with his parents, watching them all laugh and hug in relief and celebration after they had all been worried about each other, Lex could just so easily see himself as a part of it. It had than what he had wanted since Julian was born: good parents, a little brother who looked up to him.
He didn't want to say that to Pamela. He was already feeling vulnerable as it was, and besides, she was his family now. She should be enough; she was enough. He didn't want to say anything that would lead her to believe any other way.
"It was different this time," Lex said, trying to keep his mind off of the subject of family. "Clark gave up on me about a year ago, early in our friendship. He was angry, he… He hit me. This time, I kept feeling like he wanted me to explain myself."
"It must've been hard not to."
"I let my best friend think I was a murderer."
"He's lucky to have you."
He turned to face her. "You know what you have to do."
She nodded. "I'm already packed."
"I need to."
She was quiet for a moment, then she simply said, "OK."
Lex slowly let his breath out. He had never been so thankful for anyone in his life.
She put a hand on his arm, and turned him to face her, wrapping her arms around him for the last time in a while. "You need to defeat your father," she said. "A prison won't hold him. And nothing will stop him from killing other people."
"I don't know if I can kill him, Pamela."
"Have you forgiven yourself for what you did in that tornado?"
He took a deep breath. "I think I have," he said.
She didn't say anything with that. She just squeezed his hand one last time and left the room.
Before Lex went to pack, he made one more rounds in the mansion. He had hated this place when he first came here, but it had become home. He took a last walk through the kitchens, the offices, his own room, and finally the experiment room. Pamela was right, of course, that he would have to let it idle for a little while. There wasn't much else he could do.
Just before he left the experiment room, he could have sworn he heard a thud coming from inside the meteor rock room. But he must have imagined it. The only thing that was in that room was Clark's space ship, and the kryptonite was keeping it neutralized. He had seen to that himself.
A/N: End of part 2. Just give me a month or so to work out the next part!
Update: as of April 9, 2022, I'm going to put all of my ongoing long projects on hiatus until the repetitive stress injuries in my wrists have been fully healed. I've been writing chapters using dictation, but looking back, I'm not pleased with the quality this yields, and I would rather wait a few months to post again than to continue posting substandard work.
I am going to take some time to practice my dictation skills using some lower stakes projects, specifically writing one shots. If you know my history on this site, you know that I will come back and finish these longer projects. I just need to take care of my health first.
In the meantime, if you have been enjoying this series, by all means, drop me a note. I miss you all!