Crazy Girls
Chapter 34: KFC?
Disclaimer: WE DO NOT OWN ANY OF THIS EXCEPT FOR LIKE ANY OF THE DIALOGUE AND EVERYONE IS EXTREMELY OUT OF CHARACTER BUT WE DONT OWN MCDONALDS OR KFC OR TOMOE OR LIKE ANYTHING
-previously-
Kirara: *grumbles* fine, but as long as I'm still alive shippo will stay as a seventeen year old
Kagome: YOU STUPID NEKO BITCH FUCKING FUCK YOU STRAIGHT UP THE ASSHOLE!
Kirara: *falls through a random trap door in the floor*
Sango: WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON
-currently-
Kagome: Oh yeah I set that for Kuranosuke should he ever break in
Sango: you should be more worried about Tomoe than Kuranosuke... We were so...hot...
Kirara: HELP ME!
Sango: KAGOME GET HER OUT OF THERE NOW OK SHE IS MY CHILD PLEASE HELP HER
Kagome: *drops swing down* JUMP ON THIS KIRARA! DON'T GO FOR THE LIGHT!
Shippo: *managed to get inside the house* Kirara are you ok?!
Kirara: that was...disturbing...
Kagome: Sorry, watch where you walk everybody...
Sango: any other booby-traps you should warn me about?
Shippo: HAHA YOU SAID BOOBY!
Kagome: The swinging axe in the backyard, a fire-pit in the kitchen, shark pit in the toilet... *counts fingers* Yup that's it
Sango: *initiate sarcasm* great. I'll tell Miroku. Where is he, anyways?
*a scream echoes through the house*
Kagome: I think he found the shark-pit
Sango: DAMNIT IT KAGOME!
Kagome: I'M SORRY
Sango: *races downstairs* WHICH BATHROOM IS IT?!
Kagome: The one near your bedroom..
Sango: *races back upstairs* ARE YOU KIDDING ME
Miroku: *is dangling from the edge of the hole* SANGO HELP
Sango: *mutters* how the fuck do you fit a shark tank in a toilet
Kirara: shippo we're alone!
Shippo: Let's go to mcdonalds and make out!
Kirara: mkay! *they fly away*
Yashie: *walks in with business clothes torn, and a bump on his head* Madame, there seems to be a giant axe in this backyard
Kagome: SEE I TOLD YOU HE WAS ALL PROPER AND SHIT
Sango: *finally pulls Miroku out of the toilet*
Panda:((I never thought I would ever write that. Ever.
Miroku: *tries to hug sango*
Sango: please go take a shower...those clothes are sexy as hell, but... Take a shower
Miroku: right... Because of SOMEBODY, I was in the toilet! *strips*
Sango: WAIT UNTIL WERE ALL OUT OF THE ROOM GEEZ
*everyone leaves and Miroku fucking takes a shower*
Kagome: Hehehehehehehehe I can only guess what he's doing now that he's alone
Sango: Kagome please leave my house dear god
Yashie: I do believe the young fellow could be spanking the monkey
Sango: LEAVE! NOW!
Kagome: FUCK YOU! *grabs Yashie then poofs out in red smoke*
Sango: *is alone for the most part* what the fuck do I do now
Miroku: *is dripping wet and wearing only a towel* Where'd everyone go, my love? *wraps arms around you*
Sango: *flinches and on instinct punches Miroku in the face* OH MY GOD IM SO SORRY
Miroku: No it's okay, I'm used to it by now
Sango: go put some clothes on!
Miroku: Fine *gets dressed* Now what happened to the Hanyou an his psychopathic wife?
Sango: they left to go get shippo and kirara and stop them from kissing
Miroku: Ah I s-wait what?
Miroku: I thought Shippo was a child
Sango: *fills in the story* don't worry I'm sure she'll take care of it...
-Three Hours Later-
Kagome: *smirks while panting heavily* HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA NOT SO TOUGH NOW ARE YA!
Shippo and Kirara: *tied up inside Mc. Donald's with anime tears pouring down their faces*
McDonald's owner: ma'am, could you please not have people tied up in here? This is supposed to be a family friendly place...
Kagome: Not like there isn't a giant figurine of your character guy with his hand raised... And a picture with this guy who has his arms up in front of the thing...
Owner: ma'am please
Kagome: Fuck you, let's all just get out of here, we can go get KFC
-back to sango's house where they've been watching tv for the past three hours-
Miroku: My Kagome and her group got kicked out of a restaurant senses are tingling...
Sango: same... Oh well; nothing new
Miroku: And I think they have just gone to KFC
Miroku: *dials up Kagome* Hey Kagome, get some food for Sango and I would you dear?
Kagome (over the phone): Whatever you stupid lecher. I'm buying whatever I buy so deal with it
Sango: *grabs the phone* could you at least get something for me?
Food: *magically appears*
Miroku: Hey there's chocolate cake in here!
Sango: what else is there?
Miroku: what the-this is an entire cooked chicken...
Kagome: Wait what? DAMNIT
Sango: looks like we'll be covered for dinner THANKS KAGOME *hangs up*
Kagome: *looks at phone* Fucking bitch hung up on me!
Yashie: *still proper* darling, will you kindly remove this obstruction from my anal cavity?
Kagome: *kicks him in the ass, shoving the dildo farther up*
Restaurant manager: *glares, confused yet angry yet intrigued all at the same time*
Kagome: Why are you intrigued? He's my husband, but he pissed me off so I shoved that up his hole
Manager: *blushes angrily and returns to the back of the restaurant*
Kagome: *smirks* I win
Kirara: are we here with you two for punishment or did you think this would be fun
Kagome: Well first it was punishment now it's just fun
Kirara: great...
Everyone: *magically transports out of KFC*
Panda:((Wait where did they go
Fire:((Everyone had been in KFC then I just made them leave...
Panda:((But where did they teleport to
Fire:((Mars? Jk, they went to Kaggie's penthouse place thingy bunny home shit lyisngvsic DECIEVING duckerienfhbdh
Panda: ((Ok fine but only kag, yashie, Kirara, and shippo were in kfc so just them?
Fire:((Yup
Kirara: what the fuck is going on Kagome; I wanna go home!
Kagome: THEN GO
Kagome: I STILL NEED TO FUCK YASHIE IN THIS CHAPTER
Shippo: FUCK THAT CAN I LEAVE TOO
Kagome: YOU ARE GROUNDED YOUNG MAN
-Kirara flies away magically while shippo goes to his room and drowns out everything with music-
Kagome: I really MUST be a bad mother... *sulks in a very dark corner*
Yashie: come on dear; our son is just going through a phase *still all proper n shit*
Shippo: *yelling from the other room* ITS NOT A PHASE ITS THE TRUE ME! *turns up some song from high school musical and slams the door*
Kagome: But-but he is... Hang on... Something's wrong here... *looks around suspiciously*
Kagome: I know! *pulls Yashie into bathroom and locks door again*
Yashie: *comes out a minute later looking flustered and pissed off* Jesus Christ I hope I never have to do that again..
Kagome: Now everything is okay... *starts to bawl again*