Chapter 36: Seasons change, but people stay the same.
'Unity to be real must stand the severest strain without breaking.'
-Mahatma Gandhi
Joel rubbed his gloved hands down his jeans. He was surprised that his hands were sweating. He couldn't help it. He was nervous and rightfully so. He hasn't done something like this since he started dating Esther. He was rusty and out of practice, but he wanted to do this right.
Becca wasn't a woman you just take to bed. They haven't even gone that final step yet. He was working on it though. Every day he was becoming closer to a breakthrough in his therapy. Michael said it would only be a matter of time.
He needed his mind right to take that final step with her. He would ask her to be his wife. He's been planning that too. Everything seemed so fucking stupid in his head. Maria and Sharon tried suggesting things. Fuck, even Ellie had to put her two cents in.
He didn't want some overly romantic shit. That wasn't their style. He wasn't known for flowery words. Becca would never believe them coming out of his mouth anyway. He wanted something true to who they are. He couldn't give her a ring, but materialistic things didn't matter to her. Not anymore. She alluded to having everything she wanted as a child. She was born into a life of privilege. She would appreciate something simple from him.
Joel walked into Betsy's shop. She was a tailor and a dress maker. He saw the little old lady standing in front of one of her mannequins.
Betsy was a short woman who's glasses always seemed to fall down her nose, but she never attempted to push them back. She was sweet, but had a no nonsense attitude. She was born and raised in Mexico.
After the outbreak, she found herself here. Tommy said she arrived with just her nineteen year old son. They lost the rest of the family to the infection. She turned out to be a very talented seamstress. She didn't ask for anything of value, but the townsfolk welcomed her with open arms. The men made her home was always warm. The women made sure she had food on the table. She turned out to be a hell of a cook. He wasn't surprised. His people knew their shit.
She was revered in the community. She made women feel pretty again. She was a light in the darkness.
She reminded him a lot of his abuela. They would speak in Spanish whenever they were together. She knew right away of his heritage without even asking. He found comfort in her presence.
She was placing pins in a burgundy dress. He imagined the dress on Becca. She would be stunning. She's always been beautiful to him. Even during the worst of times.
He cleared his throat and she looked up a smile on her face. She got up from her stool and walked over to him. She leaned up on her tiptoes and placed her hands on his shoulders, kissing both his cheeks.
'Always nice to see you.' She stepped away from him and looked down at his stomach, shaking her head in disapproval,'You need to gain weight.'
He smirked and rolled his eyes teasingly,'I needed to lose weight.' He took a deep breath,'Are they ready?'
She grinned at the anxious look on his face. She suppressed her laugh, remembering how nervous he had been to ask her a favor. She didn't think Joel Miller could get nervous. Yet, he had looked like a deer in headlights. He reminded her of a husband. He favored his dark features. His brooding down to a fine art.
She knew the girl must've been special to him. She had him shaking like a leaf. Love. It does strange things to a man.
She had acquiesced his favor. Only with the condition he promised to invite her to the wedding. He stammered as she patted his back, giving him a break.
She was happy to help him. She liked creating pieces for people. It reminded her of what life used to be like before it all went up in smoke. She found purpose here. Her son loved it here. This was her home.
'They're ready.' She laughed as she walked over to her closet,'Men. So impatient.'
She took out two clothing bags. She lifted one of them and smirked,'This is your suit.'
He unzipped it as he looked over the finish product. He had sat through endless and boring sit ins as she took his measurements. It took forever and he wished he wasn't sober, but it had been worth it. The suit was all black and Betsy had found him a crisp white collared shirt. He had shoes back him. He made them himself. Betsy teased him he was sitting in his barn at night like some fashionista, bur she was surprised when they actually came out nice. He wasn't a complete caveman.
He looked over at her and gave her a small smile,'Thank you kindly. I…I really appreciate this.'
He tried to sneak into Becca's bag, but she slapped her hands away,'You don't see it until it's on her. That's my only rule.' She smirked,'I wish I could see the look on your dumb face when you see this beauty on her.'
His eyes darkened as he shook his head, whispering,'My girl makes anything beautiful.'
His words surprised Betsy. He was usually so reserved in regards to his feelings towards Becca. She knew he loved her though. In a way a man like him only could. Fiercely. Without a doubt, this man loved his woman fiercely.
Betsy took pity on him and patted him on the shoulder,'You're gonna wow her too. Joel Miller in a suit. I thought you only wore flannels and jeans.'
'I ain't usually the monkey suit type.' He sighed and shook his head,'I can't take her out and shit. I…I know she loves it here, but I know apart of misses her old life. She sometimes talks about the fancy restaurants she used to go to. I couldn't afford something like that back then, but I would've tried.' He shrugged,'I'm trying, ya know? I wanna show her that.'
Tears filled her eyes at his declaration. He seemed so earnest. He was determined to do this. Once he set his mind to something, it was full speed ahead.
'I think she loves you just as you are.' She shrugged as she watched him carefully zip up his suit,'She wouldn't want you to change.'
'It ain't about that.' He sighed,'I just wanna give her a gift of…appreciation. For putting up with a head case like me.'
'You've both been through trauma'. She frowned,'We've all here suffered trauma. You deserve this. Happiness. I didn't let this fucking outbreak take my spirit. I found love again. I chose life. It's time you do the same and stop trying to chase ghosts.'
He laughed softly and lifted his hand up,'I get it. I get it. Sheesh. You break my balls like, El. Stop chasing ghosts. Choose life. Get it. Girl fucking power.'
Betsy rolled her eyes and sighed exasperatingly,'Get outta here and go get cleaned up for the girl. You smell like horse manure.'
'I'm a farmer.' He backed off as she glared up at him.
He would rather die than feel the wrath of a short little Mexican woman. His abuela hit him with a sandal a time or two. While she wasn't wearing any sandals. He was sure she would whip one out.
She handed the dress bag over to Joel, making him swear not to peek. He made a solemn promise. Unbeknownst to her, he really did want to wait to see until it was actually on her.
It being winter, he could easily snag one if Becca's dresses in the back of the closet. She was unaware that Betsy was taking measurements. She had made Becca a few dresses and had her measurements on hand, but she wanted to make sure it was perfect and would fit her like a glove.
There wasn't a doubt in her mind it would fit. She watched Joel walk out of her shop and smiled to herself. They were a good couple. They were a strong couple. She knew some of what they endured together. A bond like that never dies. They would love each other for a lifetime. Even beyond that if you were the spiritual type.
She wiped the tears from her cheeks as she carried on with her work. She sat down on the stool and sighed softly.
It was all in a day's work.
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Becca frowned when she saw Maria and Sharon's horses outside of the house. She hopped off Sadie and walked inside the house. Her eyes widened when she saw the two women in the room. They seemed to be convening with Ellie and Lizzie.
She looked around the room at the solemn look on their faces. There was someone missing. Her heart started pounding hard in her chest.
Joel.
She took a deep breath to gather her courage, feeling the panic rising up within her,'Where's Joel?' There were quiet and she bounced nervously on her feet,'Where the hell is he?'
Lizzie was the one to break first. She covered her mouth and started giggling. Ellie looked at her girlfriend and laughed. Maria and Sharon seemed disappointed.
Becca narrowed her eyes as she crossed her arms over her chest,'Someone want to tell me what the fuck is going on? I had a long day and I'm tired. I take it Joel didn't relapse or die.'
Sharon smirked at her salacious words. She appreciated Becca's fire. She reminded her of a lot like herself when she was her age. Although her Richard as much as she loved him didn't look a thing like Joel. They were like night and day, but they balanced each other out.
Maria sighed as she glared at the two girls,'We came to help you.' She couldn't help but grin at the confused look on her friend's face,'Joel gave us very specific instructions to have you ready by seven. No later.'
Sharon nodded and laughed,'He said not to…fuck this up.' She shrugged,'I guess he thinks females are a new species.
Becca pursed her lips. She was becoming agitated, but also intrigued. They didn't seem afraid or angry. They were lighthearted. She wondered what trick Joel had up his sleeve. With him, it could be anything.
Maria sighed as she got up from the couch and placed her hands on her shoulders,''Joel is coming here at seven to pick you up for a date.' She shook her head at the still confused look on her face,'Baby girl, listen closely. You're man is coming to pick you up and take you out. We have to get you ready. I don't feel like hearing that man bitch anymore.'
Maria grabbed her hand and pulled her up the stairs into the bedroom, 'He got this for you too.'
Her eyes widened as Maria took the clothing bag off the door. She unzipped the bag and gingerly took out a dress.
Maria held it up proudly as she looked over the dress, nodding her approval,'Betsy's gonna have to make me one of these. I want another baby.'
Becca faintly heard what she was saying, but she could focus on was the dress. It was a pale blue, looking almost gray. The top was of a sheer material that would cover her chest. It was backless and would fall down to her ankles. The straps were thin and delicate, shimmering in the light. There was a blue lace shawl to compliment it and would keep her shoulders warm.
She softly ran her hand down the delicate fabric. Tears filled her eyes as she shook her head in disbelief,'It's the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. I've never had something so beautiful.'
There were tears in Maria's eyes as she nodded her head,'I'm not gonna lie. I've had my issues with the man, but he…cares deeply for the people he loves. I doubted him when we were kidnapped, but he stepped up. He saved both our lives. I know Tommy would've tried without Joel, but he never would've succeeded without him.' She leaned in close, whispering,'This man loves you.'
'I know.' She nodded as tears fell from her she's,'I know. I love him too, Maria. I love him so much it hurts to think about. I've never loved anyone like this before.'
Maria nodded and smiled tearfully,'And you never will.'
She stepped back from her as the rest of the women entered the room.
They immediately went to curling her hair. Sharon insisted on doing it the old school way, with curlers. Maria did her makeup, using whatever she could find. She managed to get some homemade stuff the women in town made. She darkened her eyes with the coal tip, managing to give her a decent cat eye. She used to dyes from roses on her lips.
Sharon took the curlers out of her hair and pinned it back, just as she did when she was her age. Vintage as the kids would call it nowadays.
Ellie and Lizzie just watched, seeming almost disinterested. Teenage girls were hard to impress.
Maria helped her into her dress. She carefully stepped into it as Maria and Sharon both carefully slid it up her body. Sharon slowly zipped up the dress. Becca was surprised when Sharon gave her a pair of nude heels. She was passing them down to her.
All Becca could do was embrace her and Maria warning not to smear her makeup. She was grateful to her friends. Her newfound family.
For just a night, she could pretend the outside didn't exist. There wasn't any death or gloom. She was just an ordinary woman going on a date with her guy.
Ellie and Lizzie had abandoned them, deciding to go out on the porch to wait for Joel. Becca knew it was a thinly veiled excuse for them to make out. Some people in town fanned themselves with bibles whenever they saw them together. Becca didn't see anything wrong with it. Neither did Joel .They were normal horny teenagers who just happened to be lesbians.
Maria turned her towards the mirror,He's gonna fuckin shit himself.'
Becca slowly looked up. She gasped loudly at the sight in the mirror. For so long, she had been forced to cover herself up. Only to be seen by her husband. David made her cover herself up from head to toe. Even in the summer. He kept her skin pale and her bruises hidden away from the rest of the followers.
She has been beaten again and again. Her liberties had been taken from her. Freedom. Choices. Years she could never get back.
Her only regret to meeting Joel is that she didn't have enough time to love him longer. She would love him as deep as she could. It's what he deserved.
Sharon draped the shawl over her shoulders. Becca turned in the mirror, seeing the curls of her hair down her back. Some were pinned back away from her face. She felt like some old movie star of the black and white films her grandma used to love. Her mama would've loved to see this.
As she looked at Sharon through the mirror. She couldn't help but wonder if she did.
All of the sudden, Ellie came bursting into the room,'He's coming!' Her eyes widened as she stared at Becca, blinking her eyes,'Holy shit. You look so hot. Joel's gonna shit himself.'
Maria chuckled and nodded,'That's what I said.'
Becca couldn't help but wonder why Maria and Joel clashed. They were a lot alike.
'Thank you.' Becca gave her a small smile,'I'll be down in a minute.'
Ellie nodded and ran back downstairs. She couldn't wait to see this. It was going to be so stupid. She wished she had a way to commemorate the occasion. It's cool they found each other. She would never admit that though. It was too much fun to tease them.
Becca turned to her friends and grasped both of their hands,'Thank you.' She averted her eyes between,'I'm grateful for both of you. You kept me with it.' She nodded,'You helped me build myself back up.'
Sharon, the usually terse and stern doctor, had tears in her own eyes,'You did that all on your own.'
Becca looked at Maria. She was silent, but her expression showed fondness. She used to be a lawyer. She had a hell of a good poker face.
'It takes a village.' Becca shook her head,'You showed me that.'
Maria looked down at her watch and sighed,'You showed me my impending death if we don't get your fine ass downstairs. It's almost. That man is weirdly punctual.'
She nodded and smiled softly,'Yeah, he is.'
Maria and Sharon both rolled their eyes. Young love.
The women scooted her downstairs as she nervously smoothed her dress down. Her heart was skipping a beat. It was a good kind of nervous though. She couldn't wait to see him. She was eager to spend some time with him. Alone.
The three women walked down the stairs. There was a hallway they led into the living room. She heard him talking to Ellie and Lizzie. She closed her eyes momentarily and took a deep breath.
Maria rolled her eyes and shook her head, whispering,'Hurry up. This isn't She's All That. I got a baby to get home to.'
Becca laughed softly and shook her head. She felt the tension leave her body. God, she loved her friends.
Sharon patted her back, whispering,'I want all the dirty details.' She smirked,'For Science.'
Becca smirked as she shook her head. She walked out into the living room. He was sitting on the couch. She smiled when she saw him carrying a box of something in his hands.
She couldn't help but gasp when she saw him. He lifted his head to look up at her. He had to do a double take. He quickly stood up straight, to properly assess her.
He looked over her and shook his head in disbelief. She looked like something out of a dream. He couldn't be worthy of anything this beautiful. This precious.
The dress fit her perfectly. It formed to her body like a second skin. The skirt flowed freely down to her ankles and nude heels peeked out from underneath, making her legs look even longer.
An image of her long legs wrapped around his waist while wearing those heels as he pounded hard into her flashed in his mind. He couldn't help it. He was a dirty old man sometimes.
His eyes roved up her slender body. The top of the dress was sheer lace. He could see her skin underneath. Darker fabric covered her chest. He wondered what he's skin would taste like through the thin fabric. Would she be able to feel his mouth on her nipples, sucking them into hardness.
He shook his mind of those lecherous thoughts and appreciated the beauty before him. Words couldn't even describe her.
'Gorgeous.' He took a step closer to her as he peered over her shoulder. He had to suppress her groan. He saw the bare back covered up by the shawl. She would kill him tonight. He was sure of it.
'You're the most beautiful woman I've ever seen.' He swallowed harshly, shaking his head in disbelief,'You ain't ever needed all that shit you're wearing tonight.'
She was always beautiful to him. Always. Beaten, bruised, bloody, crying and tired. Happy and excited. She would always be beautiful to him.
He saw the crestfallen look on her face and frowned. He was going about this all wrong.
He sighed and took a step closer to her, whispering,'But all done up like this? You knocked the wind right outta me. I think I might be having another heart attack.'
She blinked away tears and rubbed his arm, 'Good thing you got a nurse, huh?'
'I ain't got nothing. I'm the lucky son of a bitch you chose.'
He would lay it all tonight. His vulnerability. He would let his guard completely down. He would woo her tonight and put out all the stops. The man he used to be was still lurking inside him. He's suppressed it long enough.
Her eyes widened slightly as she looked over him. If no one else was in the room, she would've thought she imagined it. He didn't wear a suit. Not even for a funeral. Thankfully, those were few and far between nowadays.
Her eyes took him in appreciatively. The black suit he wore was sleek and form fitting. He didn't wear a tie, just a white dress shirt underneath. The collar was completely buttoned up. He looked so sophisticated. The leather dress shoes were nice and looked new. She wondered when he had the time to do all this.
Has she been so busy with work she didn't even notice? They lived under the same roof. Regardless, they still slept in separate rooms. She hoped that would change tonight. She wasn't expecting sex. Just to spend the night in the same bed with the man she loved. They earned it.
His hair was trimmed and neatly parted to the left side. He's never worn it like this before. It was a new style for him. She liked it. He even trimmed his beard and mustache. The graying in his hair was an added bonus. He was what her mama would call drop dead kinda handsome.
As she stared up at him, his eyes gazing her with adoration. She realized something in this moment. She would love him before and she would love him now. He didn't have to ask. They were always meant for this. They were just slow to catch up to it. This moment in time.
She could easily cup his cheek in her cheeks. She leaned close to him, whispering,'Sweetheart. You look so handsome.' She smiled tearfully,'You did this…for me?'
''Course I did.' His gruff and deep southern drawl was like molasses as he eyes slowly roved over her face,'You're my girl.'
He cleared his throat as he gave her a box,'I remembered you saying ya needed these.' He shrugged sheepishly,'I know a guy.'
She opened the box and her eyes widened when she saw the packets. Broccoli seeds. He remembered.
She looked up at him and shook her head in disbelief,'I love you. Thank you.'
He swallowed the lump in his throat. She said she loved him front of everyone who she trusted and were closest to her. She said it proudly and with conviction. If anyone should doubt her.
Joel felt himself falling deeper in love. There wasn't any coming back from it. Before or after. It mattered none. They were here now.
She smiled softly. She didn't need to hear the words from him. His actions spoke volumes.
She was surprised when he ran his thumb down the curve of her jaw and licked his lips.'I love you too. Course I do.' He took her free hand and grinned,'I'm gonna take my best girl out on the town.'
Ellie and Lizzie both looked at each other in disgust. Straight people were weird. Lame.
Ellie rolled her eyes and got up from the couch, shooing them along,'Now go. You have shit to do. I'm staying over Lizzie's tonight.' She smirked as she folded her hands behind her back,'In case you wanna repeat that shower shit again.' She winced, 'Please. Not again.' She looked up at him solemnly,'I need an adult.'
Joel narrowed his eyes. She's been spending too much time with Tommy. He was teaching her stuff from the past that should've stayed there.
Becca and Joel both glanced over at each other, smiling in unison.
'I ain't sorry about that.' He shrugged,'No use lyin.' He looked over at Becca questioningly,'It might happen again?'
She pursed her lips to suppress a smirk and nodded,'Definitely.'
Ellie's eyes widened in horror and she covered her ears. Becca looked back at Maria and Sharon, giving them a nod of thanks.
They smiled as they watched Joel help her put on her coat.
Maria crossed her arms as she watched them leave the house,'He actually managed to make me do it.' She laughed and shook her head,'Son of a bitch.'
Sharon looked up at her friend and frowned,'What?'
'Like him.' She huffed,'This stays between us.'
Sharon folded her hands in front of her and smirked,'I took an oath.'
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Becca followed him outside and her eyes widened when she saw a car parked out front. She shook her head in disbelief. It was a black jeep.
'It's Tommy's. He only uses to keep it running.'He smiled as he took the keys out of his pocket,'He let me borrow it.' He pulled out a grin she's never seen before. It made her weak in her knees,'I got a hot date tonight.'
She carefully placed his gift on the table. She crossed her arms over her chest and smirked,'What's up with this? You're flirting the panties off me, which is quite a feat because I'm not wearing any.'
He blinked his eyes and shook his head,'What? All I heard was you're not wearing panties.'
She rolled her eyes and laughed, playing punching him in the shoulder,'Fucking jerk.' His eyes were filled with mirth as he hunched his shoulders and teasingly ducked her blows,'Hey now. My scar.'
'You sound like Harry Potter.' She sighed,'Seriously though, you know I don't care about this stuff right? All I want is you.'
He nodded and gave her a small smile,'I know, but I…wanted to show you a good time.' He took a deep breath to gather his courage,'I want to do what I woulda done before the outbreak. I…I want you to get to know that Joel too. Just like you've shown me who you used to be. You deserve to know that him too, baby. You deserve to love him.'
She would marry this man one day. She would have his children. They would grow old together, sit on the porch of the home they built for themselves. They would leave this earth and re-emerge like roots in the ground. Settled and one with the earth. Infinite. The
realization slowly creeped up on her. She never expected this. Him. Each day, they built the framework, brick by brick. Layer by layer they slowly peeled away their masks, that impenetrable wall they kept up for so long. They still had defense mechanisms. He was learning to get rid of those crutches. She was starting to love herself. They weren't just coping anymore.
They were healing.
He took her hand and led her down the steps. She hasn't worn heels in a while. She was rusty. He kept her steady though as she slowly started to become accustomed to heals again. All she's worn is boots, sneakers or gone barefoot. She preferred barefoot.
She looked over his black wool trench coat and whistled lowly,'You look like something out of GQ. Maybe I just might jump your bones tonight.'
Not missing a beat, he smirked at her over his shoulder,'You'll be bouncing on something tonight.'
Her eyes widened up at him. She felt her cheeks get hot,'Who is this man? Did the real Joel get abducted by aliens?'
'Not aliens, darlin.' He voice smooth like honey,'Just you.'
He opened the passenger side door for her and helped her inside. Her heart skip or a beat as she watched him walk around to the driver's side. She looked up at the house, seeing everyone plastered to the windows. They weren't even trying to be sneaky about it.
She smiled to herself. This felt normal. Like they were just two people going out on a date.
He slid into the driver's side. She watched as he adjusted the mirror. His lips were pursed. Her eyes focused on the way his Adams apple bobbed in his throat. His sharp jaw taunt. He made her feel like she were on fire.
There was no hesitation on her part. She would gladly let him inside her. She touched herself imagining it. He was almost there. She was patient.
She leaned over the console and stared into the mirror,'We look as Ellie would, so fucking cool, like movie stars.'
Joel smirked as he met her eyes in the mirror,'You make me look good, darlin.'
From anyone else, she would've taken it as an insult, but the way his eyes raked over her body made her feel appreciated. He was proud to be with her. Just as she was proud to be with him.
He put the key in the ignition and grinned as she leaned close to his side. She didn't keep any distance between them. Not anymore.
He pulled away from the house and down to the trail. He looked down at her pressed up against his side. There was a cassette playing old Hank Williams. All they had were cassettes. Relics.
The music was soothing, comforting. It reminded them of simpler times. Home.
He leaned back in the seat and smiled to himself as he drove into town. He had a beautiful woman in his arms who was stupid enough to love him. He felt it a privilege to love her.
She looked up at him and smiled softly,'Where are we going anyway?'
'Women. So impatient.' He rolled his eyes teasingly as he pinched his side,'Easy, Dusty kicked me good the other day. She doesn't like her nails getting cut.'
'Serves you right.' She rested her head on his shoulder, placing her hand on his leg,'I don't care where we go. We can just ride around for all I care.'
He nodded and grinned,'We would run outta gas eventually.'
'Probably.' She laughed,'We'd make it back home though.'
He kissed the top of her head as he kept his eyes on the road. He didn't want to drive reckless. She used to be cargo they didn't need. She was precious to him. As true and realer than anything he's known to be true.
To lose her wouldn't kill him, but he wouldn't want to live. He wouldn't leave Ellie, but the loss would cripple him. For those two days she were gone, it almost did. Losing her wasn't an option. Not willingly anyway.
She was right. They would always make it back home.
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He drove the road into town and she looked up at him confusingly, wondering what he had in mind. She knew they couldn't actually go anywhere, but the fact he even went through all this trouble was enough for her.
He could've drove them back to the house and back for all she cared. Just sitting in an actual car with him. It made her feel like they were on a real date in the real world. Where there were no infected.
He stopped the car in front of the lodge. He put the car in park and switched off the ignition.
He had a huge grin on his face as he got out of the car. She looked at him through the window, feeling the fluttering in her stomach again. It's a feeling she only associated with him. She used to think butterflies in the stomach were left back in high school. He made her feel the excitement of being in love. She's never been this in love with anyone before. It was deep, all consuming and…everything. She felt like she could do anything with him. He instilled the hope there were good people left in the world.
Joel had a bounce in his step when he opened her door. He hasn't felt like this since he was a kid again. She kickstarted an old man's heart. Even Tommy commented he was less grumpy than he used to be.
He didn't see any reason to be unhappy tonight. He was having a date with the more beautiful woman in the world who somehow loved him. He wouldn't argue all the reasons why she shouldn't. He was going to fight her anymore. He wanted this just as badly as he loved.
He was never going to love another woman. She was it for him. He knew it back then too. When he first laid eyes on her, he knew she was going to impact his life. He felt it in his bones. He's never felt anything like that before or ever will again.
He took her hand and helped her out of the car. He saw the beaming smile on her face as he closed the door,'You happy to be riding in a car?'
'Yeah.' She nodded as she pursed her lips to contain her grin. She felt as if she were going to burst at the seams,'It was a lot of fun. I wonder forgot what it's like.' She shrugged,'You're okay too.'
He laughed as he nodded, kissing the back of her head,'I get that a lot.'
'You shouldn't.' She leaned up and swept a stray lock of hair back into place,'You're as good as they come.'
His eyes looked over her face as he shook his head in disbelief,'Not many would say that, honey girl.'
'I don't care what they have to say.' She shook her head,'They don't know you like I do. You treated me better than anybody's treated me in a very long time.'
He sighed as he took her hand and tangled their fingers together,'I should've been treating you better.' He nodded towards the lodge,'I plan to rectify that. Starting tonight.'
Becca felt that jolt in her stomach as he smirked at her. She was hoping he was planning to sleep in the same bed with her tonight. She would strap him in if she had to.
Her eyes roved up and down his body appraisingly. They might not be a bad idea.
Joel took keys out of his pocket and unlocked the doors. He took her coat, placing it in the vestibule. His eyes couldn't help but wander over her back back.
Betsy had been right. The dress would knock him on his ass, but it had to do more with the woman wearing it. He's never seen her so dressed up. The makeup, the hair and the dress. She still wore dresses, but makeup was sparse around these parts. She didn't take heed to the superficial bulllshit anymore, but she took care of herself. She was still a woman and deserved to feel like one.
She looked every inch the woman tonight.
He opened the doors and her eyes widened as she looked around. The entire lodge was covered in twinkle lights. She stood in the middle of the ballroom as she looked up at twinkle lights. She smiled wistfully as she turned around, trying to take them all in at once. Magical. This moment was the definitive moment of her life. This was pure happiness.
Joel swallowed the lump in his throat as he watched her. She was twirling around, the dress and shawl billowing behind her. The lights shimmered off her red hair. She looked so beautiful. Happy. Something so simple for him to do made her so happy. This is what it must feel like to be a man true to their word. Maybe he could give being an honest man a shot. Look at all the good it brought him.
She looked over at him and smiled softly, reaching her hand out to him,'Come here and look. It's so pretty.'
'You're so pretty.' He smirked as he sauntered over to her. He took both of his hands in hers, interlocking their fingers together, 'Do you like it?' He let looked up at the lights and shrugged,'I…been working on this for a bit. I had help.'
She nodded as tears filled her eyes. These were happy tears though. She wouldn't be sad tonight.
She squeezed his hands in hers as her eyes ran up and down the length of his body. He looked so handsome tonight. The suit fit him like a second skin. His body was leaner from not drinking anymore. She couldn't take her eyes off him. She preferred as he usually is, but this was good too. The suit just brought it out in him. She would have to bake Betsy a cake or something for this.
She leaned up and pressed her lips against his. She meant to kiss him briefly, but he had other ideas. He took his hands out of hers and cradled her face in his hands, kissing her deeply. She practically melted against him, moaning softly into his mouth. She pulled away to catch her breath and he immediately chased her lips. He couldn't seem to get enough of her.
She smirked against his lips, wondering what's gotten into him tonight. Not that she was complaining. He was being flirty and affectionate. He wasn't being shy with his desire for her. She fucking loved it.
She would have Betsy on commission for the next year if it meant she could get more nights like this.
Joel reluctantly pulled away as he licked his lips, tasting her and the lipstick. He closed his eyes momentarily as he stroked her bare arms.
He hummed softly as he rested his forehead against hers,'We got a whole night planned, but I want you to know when it's over. We're going home and I'm taking you to bed.'
Her eyes widened slightly as her heart hammered in her chest,'To sleep?'
'We'll get to that eventually.' He opened his eyes to look into hers, whispering,'Maria is taking Ellie for the weekend. Sharon gave you the rest of the weekend off.'
She placed her hands on his waist to steady herself. She swore the son of a bitch had her swooning. His voice was gruff and deep. She noticed his southern accent always became more pronounced when he got emotional or was aroused.
He grinned as he saw her eyes half lidded as she held tightly onto his waist,'For the entire weekend, we're not leaving our room. I wanna know what you feel like from the inside. I wanna hear you scream my name as I'm inside you. Feel you come around me rather than just on me. It ain't enough for me anymore, baby girl. I don't think it's enough for you either.'
'It's not.' Her shoulders sagged as she sighed in relief,'I didn't want you to think I was a perv or something.'
He shook his head and laughed,'The woman of my dreams tells me she wants go to bed with me. Yeah, total fucking pervert. Heathen.'
He wrapped his arms around her and lifted her up, making her squeal. He set her down on her feet as he quickly squeezed her ass,'Come on. Before the food gets cold.'
Her stomach grumbled in response at the mention of food. She had been too nervous to eat leading up to this. The last time she ate was lunch. She was starving.
He took her hand and led her to the back of the lodge. She looked up at him, shaking her head to herself in disbelief. Has this man been lurking inside him all this time? This sweet and romantic man
He was sexy tonight. She always thought so, but this was different. He seemed sure of himself, but it wasn't overt enough to come across as cocky. He was confident in himself. He had swagger.
If this was the pre-outbreak Joel, Tommy revered about than she was in for one hell of a ride. He was so much fun.
Joel led her into the dining area where they usually had banquets. It was a party reserved for two.
She gasped when she saw the small table by the window. The snowy mountains were the backdrop. The table had a candle in the middle.
There was a server tray next to the table.
Joel stared at the food and sighed in relief,'Good, Betsy made sure to bring it over.'
She smelled the delicious aromas and tried to open one of the lids curiously. He playfully slapped her hand and narrowed his eyes,'What I say about impatience?'
She smirked as she folded her hands behind her back,'It's never been a virtue of mine.'
'I wouldn't say that.' He grinned,'You waited almost three years for me to catch up.'
Joel cleared his throat as he walked over to the server tray,'I've always talked about my Abuela and the foods she used to make growing up.'
She nodded and smiled softly, remembering the times he would reminisce about his childhood. Those rare moments were few and far between. She loved learning about where he came from. He seemed so proud of his culture.
'The first dish I grew up with is called Arrollado de Huaso.' She listened and watched him closely as the Spanish rolled off his tongue.'
She would see him talking with Betsy sometimes. While she was still learning, she still wondered what they talked about. She liked that he found someone who he could share his culture. It was important they never lose where they came from.
He opened the lid as she stared down at the dish, 'Do you know what Arrollado de Huaso means?' He grinned as her brows furrowed,'Don't worry. We'll get ya there.' He laughed as she rolled her eyes,'Pork roll peasant style. My Abuela used to make this and it would feed the entire family, but this is just a smaller version of it.'
She could smell the spices. The meat was wrapped in twine and it smelled and looked so good.
He smiled as he placed his hand on her back,'Spices, bacon and chili. I remember chopping up the bacon. Damn near took off my finger one time.'
Becca smiled up at him fondly. She was reeling. He was enjoying himself. She could see the light in his eyes as he spoke about his family. His culture.
She really loved this man.
He turned to the next dish and lifted up the lid. She saw two small circular clay dishes. They seemed to be filled with a casserole of some kind.'
Joel looked up at her as he watched her study the food. She seemed enraptured as he spoke. She was interested in what he had to say. She wanted to learn about him. He couldn't wait to share so much more with her.
'Pastel de Choclo.' He shook his head,'This is my favorite. She would make this all the time. We didn't have a lot of money growing up. This was filling. She would put olives, raisins, garlic, onions. Whatever meat we had. The main ingredient is corn.' He smirked,'Pastel de Choclo. Corn pie.'
'Kinda like a shepard's pie?' She saw the look of horror on his face,'What?'
He placed his hand over his chest in mock horror. He whispered something Spanish under his breath, rolling his eyes up to the ceiling,'I swear she didn't mean it. You're gonna have Abuela rolling in her grave foe that.'
She laughed and shook her head,'Sandal to the head?'
His eyes gleamed with mirth as he kissed the top of her head,'Oh yeah. Last but not least.' He lifted up the lid to the last dish,'Alfajores.
She leaned over to look, seeing two biscuits stuck together with something.
'Manjar.' He saw the confusion on her face,'It's like a spread with milk and sugar. I usually like them with coconut, but Betsy said white chocolate would be better.'
Her eyes stared at the dessert. She wanted to eat everything at once. He noticed as she stared at the food. He was starving his woman and that won't do.
He walked over to the table and pulled out her chair,'Let's eat. My beautiful girl looks hungry.'
She sat down and he took a seat across from her. He took out a bottle of wine from underneath the table and opened it,'I ain't drinking tonight.' His eyes met hers,'I want to remember everything about this. Everything. I don't wanna ruin this. I want you to try this though. It was my mama's favorite wine.'
He slowly poured the red wine into her glass. It was crazy. He wasn't even tempted to drink. He truly wanted to be sober for tonight. He wanted to remember every inch of her.
'Carmenere. She would break it out for every occasion.' He averted his eyes downward,'I remember she got Esther drunk off her ass at our wedding. She ended up getting sick.' He took a deep breath,'That's how she found out she was pregnant with Sarah.'
She placed her hand over his, whispering,'Thank you, sweetheart.' She shook her head,'For sharing all this with me. Thank you.'
He placed the bottle of wine on the table, watching her as she took a sip. His eyes were fixated on her red lips on the glass. He couldn't wait to feel those lips pressed against his neck as he lost himself inside her for the first time.
He picked up the pork dish as he served a slice on her plate,'I want to do this more. Share things with you.' He shrugged,'It don't just have to be gussied up like this. I wanna…talk to ya more. Share more of my life with ya.'
She blinked the tears from her eyes as he placed the casserole dishes in front of them. He was so earnest. He didn't even want to drink. He stuck with water. She knew it was difficult for him, but he was trying. He was learning to adapt and discover who he was sober.
She couldn't help by think how young he looked tonight. The lines around his face were smoother, his eyes softer. His eyes gleamed with happiness. She wanted to see more of this Joel.
Becca wasn't ashamed to ask for seconds. He seemed excited she was enjoying the food. She really did. Everything came together.
He cleared their plates as he placed the dessert in front of them. There was only one for them to share. Not that she could eat a lot anyway. She ate more than her share. Joel did too. He put down more than her.
She only drank one glass of wine. She didn't want to get drunk. She wanted to be clear minded for this too. It was a long time coming.
He looked over at her as he scooped some of the gooey spread onto his thumb,'Manjar's always been my favorite. You can put it on just about anything and it'll taste good.'
She leaned over the table and licked the sticky substance off his thumb. His cock twitched in his pants as watched her hot wet tongue swirl around his thumb. The tight trousers made him uncomfortable and he shifted in his seat to adjust himself.
'You're right.' She released his thumb with a pop, smirking at the half hooded look in his eyes,'It does taste good on just about anything.'
She killed him in this moment. This would be what done him in. Fuck, he loved this woman. She went tit for tat with him.
He loved her smart mouth. He thought about taking her on the table. Her pretty dress hiked up as he feasted on her for dessert.
He shook his head of those thoughts. No. He wanted her nice and slow at first. He wanted to take his time. He wanted to see what new moans he could get out of her
By Sunday though, he would have her spread on their kitchen table. Her thighs wrapped around his head as he made her scream his name. On the Lord's day.
They finished the dessert and settled in for a little bit. They talked for awhile, about everything and nothing. Mostly about the plans for the new house. He really seemed to be doing it.
She was anxious to start the rest of her life with him. Tonight would be a new beginning. Maybe things would actually be quiet for a change.
Joel got up from the table and held his hand out, 'One last surprise.'
She took his hand and he easily pulled her up from the table. He led her back out into the ballroom. He pulled off a table cloth from one of the tables, uncovering a record player.
'This was the song my mama used to play every night before we went to bed.' He smiled fondly as tears filled his eyes,'It used to make me fall asleep. It would help Sarah sleep too when she was a baby.'
He raised Sarah alone since she was a baby. He told her Esther abandoned them. He woke up one morning and she left her ring and a note she couldn't be a wife and mother anymore.
Everyone in his life seemed to abandon him. She would've be one of those people. She was with him until the very end.
She smiled tearfully as he put the dial on the record. The soft melodic sounds of a flamenco guitar played. The music echoed throughout the otherwise quiet hall.
He walked over to her and held out his hand,'Dance with me, darlin.'
'I would be honored.' She took his hand and he wrapped his other arm around her waist.
He slid his hand down to her lower back, guiding her along as he slowly moved her around the dance floor. He was light on his feet, his movements seeming effortless. She wasn't surprised. She's seen him in combat. He was like a butterfly when he fought.
She stumbled a few steps, feeling clumsy and out of practice. She looked up at him, smiling sheepishly,'Sorry, I haven't danced in heels in awhile.' She lowered her eyes shyly,'I used to be an honest to God debutant.'
He smirked as he looked over her face,'Of course you did.' He pulled her closer as he pressed his cheek against hers, whispering,'Let this tumbleweed teach ya a thing or two.'
She laughed as he moved her around the dance floor. Her feet ached by the time they were done, but she couldn't remember the last time she's laughed this much. She was so happy.
Joel kissed her forehead as they swayed to the music,'Sarah would've loved you.'
She looked up at him as she saw the tears in his eyes. He had a smile on his face though, 'You think so?'
'Yeah.' He sighed into her skin,'She was always nagging me to find someone. She said I was too old to be hanging with her all the time. She would've told me not to fuck it up with you. She would've made me swear I wouldn't fuck it up.'
'Did you have girlfriends while raising her?'
'Not really. I had…friends.' He swallowed harshly,'This sounds shitty, but I never had to worry about getting sex. It was the sticking around part?'
'For you or for them?'
He smiled tearfully and shrugged,'Maybe both.' He kissed her forehead as the record switched to another slow song,'I want you to stick around I ain't wanted that for a long time.'
She leaned up and kissed his lips, whispering,'Me neither.'
&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&
His arm was wrapped around her as they walked to the vestibule to get their coats. It was time to head home.
They were both nervous and anxious. It's been awhile for both of them, but they knew it's what they wanted. It was the progression of their relationship. It was always going to lead to this moment.
Joel helped her put her coat on. He kissed the back of her head before putting on his coat. He smiled as she wrapped her arm around his waist as they walked outside.
It was freshly snowing outside and it was freezing outside. For the first time, they didn't mind the cold.
They were warm and wrapped up in each other. They would go home. He would take her up to their bed, put on the fireplace and let her fire burn him from the inside out.
His eyes had been on her all evening. Something had been weighing heavily on his mind. The feeling was intense as he looked at her. Realization dawned upon him. It felt like a shade had been lifted up in a dark room.
Joel gently tugged on her hand,'Becca?'
She stopped walking and turned around to see him standing there. He had a serious look on his face. One she's never seen before.
'What?' She stepped closer to him, 'What's wrong?'
He laughed. He honest to God laughed. Her eyes searched his face,'Are you drunk?'
'Fuck no.' He didn't seem angry or offended by her question. Just amused,'For the first time in awhile. There's nothing wrong. Absolutely nothing.' He took her hands in his, his face becoming serious again.'I ain't got a ring for this.' He frowned,'Don't know if I'll ever have one honestly.'
She felt the butterflies in her stomach once again. She could hear her heart thumping loudly in her ears. It's funny. She's been asked twice before. Ben went all out with flowers and candy. Joel showed up and remembered she desperately wanting broccoli seeds for her garden. David forced her into marriage.
Joel shared his culture with her. His life with her. This was so much better than anything she dreamed of as a little girl.
'I don't need one.' She shook her head as she held onto his hands tightly,'I just want more of this. Everyday. All the days. Until there aren't any left.'
He took a deep breath to gather his courage,'I didn't plan this for tonight.' He smiled wryly,'I ain't that much of a pansy.'
His eyes searched her face for any sign of uneasiness. He saw nothing but love and acceptance. He could do this. He wanted to do this.
He took his hands out of hers as he got down on his knee. Betsy would have his hide knowing he was dirtying his trousers. She would forget all about when he told her he actually did it. He grew a pair of balls.
He was nervous as hell. He didn't know how to do this. He knew this is how it's done. He didn't propose to Esther. They were both drunk and decided to elope to Vegas. They were fucking kids. This mattered. He's never got down on his knees for anyone. She was worth it.
Tears fell down her face as he got down on one knee, in the snow with his brand new trousers on. She was shaking, but not because of the cold. She was anxious to start this new chapter with him.
Joel took her hand and shook his head,'You're everything to me. Since the first time I laid eyes on ya. I thought you were a pain in the ass. Still are.' She laughed through her tears,'I coulda never imagined you woulda stuck with me this long. He shook his head,'I knew you were beautiful, but I didn't allow myself to appreciate it. I thought I didn't deserve to look at someone like you. Thought when we got here, you would run for the hills. I gave ya every reason to.' He swallowed harshly,'You saved my life. In every way. You've shown me…humanity in a way I didn't think existed anymore. You told me you'll follow me anywhere. I'll follow you too, baby. Cause I'm so in love with you,I can't fucking thing straight. You drive me crazy. But I know that I was meant to…love you. I want this for the rest of my life. I wish I woulda met ya before all this. We coulda had more of this.
He sighed and shook his head. He was rambling and stalling,'What I'm trying to say is. Rebecca Bennett. Will ya do me the pleasure of being my wife?'
Joel heard the loud pop, but it didn't register at first. His eyes and mind had been solely focused on her.
Her eyes were wide as she stared at him. For a moment, it didn't register.
She saw him stare at her in horror. His eyes were wide as he let out a loud wail. She looked down and that's when she saw it.
The gunshot wound to her abdomen. Suddenly, the adrenaline of the moment wore off. She placed her shaking hand over her stomach. She lifted her trembling hand to her face. There was so much blood.
She stared at him blankly and shook her head, unable to comprehend what was happening,'Joel?'
Joel quickly scrambled off his knees. His leather shoes were making him slip and slide around in the snow, but he managed to catch her before she fell.
He placed his arm underneath her waist as her body became limp. Tears filled his vision as he whimpered, whispering softly,'You're okay, honey girl. I got you. It's okay.'
She tried to speak, but her tongue felt heavy. Her stomach felt hot. She could feel the blood seeping into her once beautiful dress.
He slipped off his shoes, leaving them behind. He gingerly lifted his arms underneath her legs and picked her up, carrying her barefooted to the hospital, leaving a trail of blood behind them. Tears fell down his face. He almost fucking had it. It was right within his grasp.
Happiness.
He stared down at her. Her eyes were fluttering shut. She struggled to keep them open as she stared up at him. The color was starting to drain from her eyes. She was bleeding out. He survived the same gunshot wound. She would survive. She had to.
He leaned down and pressed his lips against her forehead, whispering soothingly,'You're okay, honey. I got you. I got you. You're gonna be okay.'
He kept saying that as he kicked open the hospital doors, shouting for everyone and anyone to help her. They would help her. She would live.
God help them if they didn't.
(Act 2 is up next. Also, Becca doesn't die. That would be too evil for me. Joel doesn't know that though )
Also, my boyfriend is Chilean so he's been my Joel info. Lastly, I thought about putting Betsy and Joel's convos in Spanish, but I didn't want this to end up as homework for some people. Learn Spanish if you can though! Such a beautiful language.)