Chapter 46: Grave Secrets
'A secret's worth depends on the people from whom it must be kept.'
It took them three days to realize Bruce was missing, which was longer than they expected.
Becca and Joel went about their business as if nothing happened. They didn't talk about what happened unless they were behind close doors. No one except Ellie knew and she wasn't talking.
They wondered if anyone would blame them. After all, he was Becca's bodyguard and one of Joel's partners on patrol. If anybody would notice him missing, it should be either one of them.
Joel was standing on scaffold repairing a window when Tommy climbed up to join him.
Tommy was silent for a few moments as he looked up at Joel warily,'So Ted said he hasn't seen Bruce at any meetings or patrols. They found his horse up on Ridge Canyon.' He cleared his throat,'Would you know anything about that?'
Joel sighed as he placed his hammer on the ledge,'Why would I know anything about that, Tommy?'
Joel remained calm and kept his cool. Fortunately enough for him, he's had experience with keeping secrets and making sure people stay dead. He would take the secret to the grave. Pun very much intended.
'People in town are starting to ask questions.' Tommy sighed,'They think something happened to him.'
He shrugged as he picked up his hammer,'Maybe it did. He probably wandered off and got himself missing.'
Tommy stared up at him helplessly. When he was told Bruce was missing, he immediately thought of Joel or Becca. He knew his brother. He's dealt with nightmares for over twenty years thinking about his brother and everything he's done.
It's the reason why Tommy left him. He knew that if he stayed, him and Tess would bring him down. It was an act of self preservation. He knew what Joel was capable of, which is what worried him.
Joel laughed as he looked over his brother's face,'You think I did something to him?' He shook his head,'So everyone who goes missing or dead in this town and I'm to blame? Way to fuckin have some faith in me.'
He felt guilty for lying to his younger brother, but it was something that had to be done. He had his wife and daughter to protect. They went above everything else. Sometimes morality needs to fall to the wayside.
He would kill Bruce all over again if he had to. His wife helped him bury the fucking body. Let someone say they weren't committed to each other.
Tommy frowned as he placed his hand on his shoulder,'I'm sorry, but I had to ask. I know you wouldn't do that…here. Just some people-'
'Think I'm a piece of shit.' He nodded,'Yeah, I know. I appreciate ya asking before sending me to the gallows.' He jerked his head towards the toolbox,'Now help me fix this. I don't wanna be here all day. It's Christmas Eve.'
'Becca wants you home.' He smirked,'This is your first big one as a family right?'
'We were always a family.' He kept his voice hushed so no one else could hear them,'We just made it official.'
Tommy picked up a hammer and began helping his brother. Just like old times.
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When Joel walked into the house, his senses were assaulted by the smell of baked cookies. His stomach grumbled as he took off his coat and hat. He had a long day. He was starving, tired and just wanted to be home with his wife and kid.
Christmas music was playing from the old record player. He smiled to himself as he heard laughing in the kitchen. This almost felt normal. Almost. As long as no one else tried to interfere with their happiness.
'I'm home!' He shouted out as he walked down the hallway into the kitchen.
He stood in the archway of the kitchen watching as Becca stirred something in a bowl while Ellie was decorating the cookies.
He took a moment to watch her. His beautiful wife. He does this sometimes, watching her when he thinks no one else is looking. Even after being married for six months, it still astounds this woman chose to marry him. Not every woman would help you get rid of a dead body.
She didn't even see him standing there. He wondered if they even heard him come inside the house.
She was wearing a red sweater and a long black skirt with an apron covering it. Her hair was pulled back into a braid and her cheeks were flushed from the heat of the kitchen. The blush on her skin reminded him of how she looked after an orgasm.
He felt the desire stirring in his belly. He wanted her again, which is nothing new. He wanted her all the time. In anyway he could have her. If Ellie wasn't here he would've had her bent over the counter by now.
His conversation with Tommy earlier had him on edge. He knew his brother suspected him, but he would never admit it. Neither would anyone in town, but he wouldn't concern himself with them. They couldn't prove it.
He whistled lowly as he made himself known. She looked up and she had a big smile on her face,'Hey there, stranger.'
He smirked as he walked over to her. She already had her arms open and ready for him. Just like she always did.
He cupped her cheek and kissed her lips, letting them linger for a moment. He could taste butterscotch on her tongue, which only made him want her even more.
He hummed softly as he pulled back, whispering,'Hey yourself.' He bent down and whispered in her ear,'Just so ya know, if Ellie wasn't here I would be balls deep inside you right now.'
Her eyes widened as she felt the heat rising to her cheeks. She pursed her lips to suppress her smirk and rolled her eyes, whispering,'You're such a perv.'
'Hmm.' He grinned,'You love it though.'
She shook her head and laughed. He wasn't wrong. She loved it-probably a little bit too much.
She looked over her shoulder, smiling softly as he hugged Ellie and asked her about what she was making. It was times like this she loved the most. When it was just the three of them and no one else. The way it should be.
She loved how openly affectionate he was with her in front of Ellie. He didn't hide who he was from either of them. They didn't bullshit each other.
Joel snuck a cookie from Ellie's batch and she smacked his hand,'Hey, these are for Betsy.' She frowned,'Get your own cookies.'
He chewed on his bottom lip as he playfully tugged on Becca's skirt. She playfully smacked his arm and he wrapped his arms around her waist from behind as he buried his face in her neck, breathing in her scent.
'You're distracting me.' She shook her head,'I need to get these done.'
He kissed up and down her neck as he rested his chin on her shoulder,'El told me to get my own cookies. Just doing what I'm told.'
She smiled to herself, knowing he didn't do anything he was told,'If I told you to get a shower would you?'
He frowned as he leaned back from her,'Is that you're way of telling me I stink?'
'Yes.' Ellie said as he scrunched her nose,'You smell like a barn.'
He snorted and shook her head,'Kids these days. I swear to God.'
Becca laughed as Joel unwrapped his arms from her and lifted his hands up in surrender,'Okay, I get the hint. Sheesh.'
Joel grabbed another cookie from Ellie's stash and made a beeline out of the kitchen. He heard Ellie cursing him out and laughed to himself. Whenever things got rough, it was always nice to come home and put things into perspective. This is what mattered the most.
After cleaning up and having dinner, Ellie went to hang out with Lizzie. Joel was sitting in the living room reading a book while waiting for Becca to finish showering. He thought about joining her in the shower, but he knew she enjoyed her showers. It was her time to rewind after a long day. Then she was all his.
He looked up from his book, sighing when he saw her walk into the living room. She was wearing a white spaghetti strapped shirt and tiny black shorts. He noticed she didn't dress like this when she first started staying with them. She would cover herself up or wait until she got to her room to change. She didn't hide herself with him now. She was open and vulnerable.
He put his book down onto the table and spread his legs, giving her enough room to sit on his lap.
He stretched his arms on the back of the couch and averted his eyes down to his lap, whispering,'Come here, my beautiful wife.'
She smiled shyly as she eased herself down into his lap. He leaned back against the couch, his eyes trailing up and down her long legs. Her hair was wet from the shower and he could smell her shampoo and the rose scented oil she loved so much. Rose, strawberries and vanilla were the three things he always associated with her.
She ran her hands through his hair, admiring the longer length and curls. She closed her eyes and sighed softly as he kissed all over her face. This is what she loved the most. When the chaos ceased and the work was done, they could just sit and be together with no one else coming in between them.
They repeated their ritual of slipping their rings onto each other's fingers. She laid her head against his shoulder as she looked down at her ring. She always felt better with her wedding band on her finger. She didn't like hiding her marriage from anyone.
He said it was to protect them. When would it ever be safe enough? Danger always existed. Regardless of the circumstances.
He kissed the back of her neck as his hands slid down to her arms,'Tommy asked me about Bruce today.'
She tensed up and swallowed harshly, nodding her head slowly,'Maria asked me today too.' She frowned,'She didn't seem like she suspected anything, but I'm not so sure.'
'Me too.' He sighed,'Tommy and Maria have our backs. People can say whatever the hell they want. It doesn't prove anything.' He slid his hands to her stomach as he slid them up to her chest,'We're breaking our rule. No talking shop until after Christmas.'
She rolled her eyes and laughed softly,'Yeah yeah yeah. I know.' She moaned softly as his large hands groped her tits,'What were talking about again?'
He smiled against her skin as she rubbed her ass against his crotch. Her hands gripped his thighs and his heart started pounding hard in his chest. He loved that she was starting to get more comfortable with intimacy. She was opening up more and coming out of her shell. She wasn't afraid to tell him what she wanted and needed. He loved that she trusted him so much.
His left hand slid down the front of her shorts. He wasn't surprised to discover she wasn't wearing any underwear. She rarely did around him. She said he would always ruin them anyway. He would say he's sorry, but he's really not.
She moaned softly as his fingers deftly touched her clit, rubbing it small circles. She rubbed her ass against his erection, feeling his cock twitch as she mimicked the motion of his fingers on her cunt. She could hear the slick sounds of his fingers sliding against her wet cunt.
He sucked and bit on her earlobe, turning her into a puddle of mess on his lap,'I gotta be inside ya, baby girl.' His tone was laced with desire and gruff with lust,'You're always so wet for me. You're such a good girl.'
She felt a rush shoot through her at his words. He would make her blush with the things he said. She's had men tell her what they were going to do to her; with or without her permission. She loved his filthy mouth though. He treated her with so much care during sex. She never feared opening up to him.
He gently slapped her ass as he lifted his hips up to pull his sweatpants down. She stood up from his lap and hurriedly took her clothes off. They were usually slower and took their time, but it's been a busy couple of days. They've been so exhausted. As soon as their heads hit the pillow they were asleep. They needed each other. They needed this.
Joel grabbed her waist and pulled her back on top of him. She held his face in her hands, both of them laughing as he kissed her. She leaned back from him teasingly and he chased her lips.
He cupped the back of her head and bunched her hair in his fist. She slid her hands into his hair, tangling them in his long dark curly tresses. She loved his hair longer. She had more traction when he was eating her out, which is something he seemed to love to do.
He gripped his cock and slid the tip of himself up and down her cunt, coating it with her wetness. He bent his head and slowly spit onto his cock. She watched as he slowly jerked his cock with his saliva.
She bit her bottom lip as he positioned himself at her entrance. She loved that he didn't ask her anymore. He didn't need to. She would always want him.
He slipped the head of himself inside her and leaned back against the couch, shrugging almost nonchalantly,'You know what to do.'
She laughed and shook her head at the smirk on his face. He was a cocky son of a bitch sometimes. She found his smugness sexy, but would never admit to it.
She gripped his shoulders as she fully sat herself on him with one stroke. They both gasped as Joel dropped his head back against the chest, his eyes rolling in pleasure as he murmured a curse word under his breath. She loved watching his face as he first slid inside her. The look of euphoria on his face did her in. Every. Single. Time. He appreciated her body and didn't her it for his own selfishness. He treated her like a gift. Something to be cherished. She's never had that before.
Becca began to slowly slide herself up and down on his cock. His hands slid up her ribcage and cupped her tits. He pushed them together and greedily sucked on both of her nipples. She pulled at the strands of his hair as his mouth assuaged her tits.
He arched his hips up sharply, almost sending her bouncing off him. He gripped her waist and smirked, pulling her back against him,'Where you think you're going, huh?' He let out a guttural moan as she experimentally bounced in his lap,'Fuck…keep doing that.'
She did as she was told. She bounced herself on his cock, her tits dangling in his face. He kept arching up into her tight little body, his eyelids fluttering shut at the feel of her. Every single nerve in his body was on fire. Her body was so warm, like sinking into molten lava. She gripped him so tightly it almost hurt.
He went back to sucking on her tits. He groped the other while sucking and biting on it. He kept alternating back and forth between each one. Her nipples were glistening with his saliva. Her tits were already sore from his beard. He discovered early on her tits were the most sensitive during sex and he used that to his advantage.
She clutched at his face, kissing him desperately as she rode his cock slowly. She could feel his body tensing up, like he was holding himself back. She could feel his hands trembling as they held her waist.
'Show me.' She mumbled pleadingly against his lips,'Show me how you like it. Please.'
His body flourished at her words and he could feel the sweat forming on his skin. Fuck, she got him so hot. She was already running through his veins. Deep and no escape. Sex just solidified what they already knew. They belonged to each other. Nothing could break that.
He looked over her face, making sure she was comfortable. He gripped her hips tightly and slammed her down onto his cock as his sharply thrust up into her. He obliged and showed her how he liked it.
She cried out every time he pushed her down onto his cock. He was so deep she could feel him at the entrance of her womb. He was so big it hurt, but she was so wet and took him in so good. Just like he always knew she would.
The sounds of their sweaty skin colliding and their ragged loud moans echoed throughout the house. The old rickety couch creaked loudly as she rode him hard and fast. Just how he liked it.
She pushed at his chest and made him lean back against the couch. She gripped his wrists and slid them above his head. He was stronger than her and could overpower her, but he never would. He trusted her with his entire being.
His eyes widened as she bounced hard in his lap. She let go of his hands to brace them against his chest. He watched her as she rode him. Her long wet hair was billowing around her. Her head was thrown back in pleasure. Her chest was red from his beard and covered in love marks. Her nipped gleamed from his spit. She was the sexiest he's ever seen her.
He smirked and shook his head, whispering under his breath,'Well shit.'
She was a quick study. She bounced on his duck just how he loved it. He dropped his head back against the counter as he arched up into her. He couldn't rememberer the last time anyone's fucked him like this.
Her hands ran all over his body, in his hair and over his face. He loved how she couldn't keep her hands off him during sex. They had that in common. She was the best sex he's ever had. Hands down. Maybe there was something to the saying it's better with someone you're in love with.
He could feel his balls tightening and the burning in the pit of his belly. He slid his hand down in between their connecting bodies. He started rubbing her clit with his thumb.
She whimpered as she cupped the back of his neck, her eyes clenching shut as she felt her orgasm building,'Fuck, I'm gonna come.'
'Me too.' He gritted his teeth as he panted harshly,'Harder. Fuck me harder. Please.' He whispered as she bounced so hard in his lap his hips started bouncing off the couch.
He growled and snarled as he slapped her ass, whispering roughly,'Attagirl. Fuck yes.'
Her eyes widened as he let out a whine as she rolled her hips against his. She's never heard that sound come out of him before. Then again, she's never ridden him like this. Hard and fast until he couldn't take it anymore.
She came first, her pussy clenching tightly around him as her juices gushed onto his cock. He gripped her hip with his one hand as his hips snapped into hers. He came with a shout, his come spurting out of him and deep into her womb. She trembled as she felt the warmth spread throughout her belly, burning her from the inside out.
She rode him slowly through their orgasms, wanting to milk every last drop out of him. She faintly wondered if he should be coming inside her, but they've been married for almost three months now and she hasn't gotten pregnant. She didn't even know if she could. Should they even be worried about it? They discussed having children, but she didn't know if he was ready for that yet. She didn't know if she was either. Could anyone really be ready for it?
He stroked her hair as he kissed her sweat slicked forehead,'I…' He giggled and shook his head,'I ain't ever blow like that with a woman riding me.' He laughed as he laid his head back and stared up at the ceiling,'You broke me. Shit was so good.'
Her eyes widened as he started giggling. Joel Miller was honest to God giggling. No one would believe her.
She lifted herself up as his softened cock slid out of her. He winced slightly as she laid her head on his chest. She wasn't ready to give up just yet.
'Thank you.' She whispered as she kissed his chest,'Thank you saying that.'
'Saying what?' He frowned and shook his head confusingly,'That you're good at sex?'
She nodded silently, but didn't say anything.
He sighed and cupped her cheek, lifting her head to look up at him,'Honey girl. You ain't gotta thank me for that. It's the fucking truth.' He shook his head,'I've never come that hard with anyone else. Shit, you just made me come so hard I almost passed out. If anything, I should be thanking you.'
Tears filled her eyes as she leaned up and kissed his lips,'I love you so much, husband. So much.'
He swallowed the lump in his throat and stroked her hair,'I'll never get tired of hearing ya say that. I love ya too, baby. More than anything in this fuckin world.'
'More than guns?' She smirked,'And your guitar?'
He nodded and returned her smirk,'Way more than my guns. My guitar? You're a close first for sure.'
She laughed as she playfully elbowed his side,'You're such a jerk.'
He tickled her sides, making her laugh as she squirmed on his lap,'You love it. Come on. Tell me you love it.'
She giggled as he pinched her sides. She grabbed his hands and tangled their fingers together into a fist,'You're my jerk though.'
His face became serious as he leaned forward and kissed her lips, whispering,'Always.'
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Ellie was standing by the barn doors, keeping a lookout for Joel. Becca was finished the last minute preparations for his Christmas gift. They've spent the last two months planning it.
Ellie looked over at Becca and frowned,'He better like this. It's way too damn early in the morning for this.'
Becca laughed and shook her head. She was always grumpy in the mornings. He's and Joel had that in common. He was slowly coming around though. Working on a farm meant rising early. She always loved waking up early. It gave her a jumpstart on the day and made her feel productive.
Becca looked back at her and smirked,'I thought kids loved Christmas.'
Ellie crossed her arms over her chest and stared at her crossly, 'I'm an outbreak baby, remember?'
'How could I forget?' She sighed,'Outbreak or not. Christmas is awesome. It's also our first Christmas as a family.'
'I thought we were already a family?' She shrugged,'What the hell have we been doing all this time?'
Becca glanced over at her and took off her gloves,'You know what I mean. It's our first Christmas being married. It's special.'
'He's coming.' Ellie's eyes widened as her eyes darted around the barn,'What do we do?'
Becca laughed as she wrapped her arm around her shoulders. The teenager was almost as tall as her,'Just act cool.' She kissed the top of her head,'You're getting too grown up, kiddo. I don't like it.'
Ellie smiled as she looked up at her,'Sharon said I grew like a weed since I've been here. I'm almost eighteen.'
Becca's heart sank as she frowned,'Don't remind me. You're growing up too fast.'
She watched Joel walking up the trail. She was nervous and excited for his Christmas gift. After everything he's done for them, he deserved to have something nice too. She just hoped he appreciated it.
It was only five thirty in the morning, but Joel was wide awake as he stepped outside, breathing in the cool mountain air. Becca wasn't in bed when he woke up. He saw the light on in the barn and figured she got a head start on the chores.
He smirked as he walked up to the barn, excited to give his wife a proper good morning,'Good morning, honey girl.'
'Honey girl?'
He jumped slightly at the sound of Ellie's voice. He turned around and saw Becca and Ellie standing there, matching grins on their faces.
Ellie looked up at him in disgust,'Honey girl?'
'Shut it.' His tone was light and not the least bit threatening,'I'm allowed to call my wife whatever I like.'
Joel met Becca's gaze and a sultry smile spread across her face. He felt that fluttering in his chest again. The feeling he only associated with her.
Ellie grumbled something under her heath as Becca gently nudged her side. She huffed and relented, nodding her head,'We have a surprise for you.' Ellie grinned,'Honey girl.'
Becca covered her mouth to stifle her giggle at the look of exasperation on Joel's face. Ellie put him through the wringer sometimes. It was funny to see. She seemed to push all of his buttons at once.
Joel averted his eyes between them warily, 'A surprise?' He looked at them skeptically,'For me?'
Becca sighed and shook her head, 'Enough with the dramatics.' She beamed and bounced excitedly on her feet,'It's Christmas. Can you two save breaking each others balls for one more day?'
Ellie and Joel grinned at each other. She knew it was a lost cause. She's surmised they did it to drive her crazy. They were like two peas in a pod.
Becca grabbed his hand and pulled him over to Dusty,'You're gonna love it. Come on.'
Joel let her pull him along as they walked over to Dusty. She waved her hands over his gift, a pleased smile on her face,'Ta da!'
Becca stood next to Ellie and took her hand, letting him admire his gift.
His eyes started watering as his hands trailed over the brand new saddle. It was made of brown leather. He could smell the fresh rawhide. There were intricate details woven into the leather and it was trimmed with gold yarn. There were holsters to carry numerous weapons and a large satchel in the back to carry his belongings.
He had been talking about needing a new saddle. He's had his for almost four years. It was starting to wear and tear over time. It was weathered and the leather was broken into. He needed something more comfortable to travel in. She listened and heeded to his words, setting her plan into motion.
He shook his head in disbelief as tears pricked his eyes,'This is mine?'
'Sure is.' Becca nodded and smiled softly. She walked over to the saddle and lifted up one of its flaps,'We had something engraved too.'
Joel carefully read over the engraving, reading it aloud,'No matter the distance. We'll always be with you. With love, Ellie and Becca.'
He laughed slightly as he quickly wiped the tears from his eyes. He took off his cowboy hat and ran a hand through his hair,'I ain't ever…this is…' He shook his head,'I don't even have words for it.'
Becca wrapped her arms around his waist as he bent down and kissed her lips,'We figured you needed it. We wanted to make sure you had a saddle fit for a real cowboy.'
He was tempted to ask her where her saddle was to ride him, but he didn't think she would appreciate that in front of Ellie. He made a mental note to lay that one onto her later. He was so taken aback by his gift he could barely speak. It's the more thoughtful gift he's ever received. He'll cherish it forever.
Joel turned to Ellie and opened his arm,'Come here, you.'
Ellie walked over to him as he wrapped his arm around her, pulling her close to him. He kissed both of their heads as he stared at the saddle,'Thank you both. This is fuckin great. Thank you.'
As he held onto his lifelines, his eyes drifted to the spot where Bruce had lain almost a week before. He turned to meet Becca's gaze. She glanced over to the same spot and gave him a small smile, silently nodding her head.
Nothing was over. They weren't even close to the thick of it yet. They could feel it slowly approaching like a pending storm. They would be prepared for it. Just as they always are. They would rely on each other.
They finished the chores on the farm before they went back into the house. Holidays don't exist when you have a farm. Animals needed to get fed, pens had to be changed and the sheep needed to be herded. There was never a day off, but they loved it though.
Joel was nervous to give his gifts to the girls. Sharon assured him they would love them. Her and Betsy helped him. He owed a lot to those ladies. They saved his ass in more ways than one. They've kept him from sleeping in the guest bedroom that's for damned sure.
He was a little rusty when it came to marriage and relationships. He was learning how to be a father again to a teenage girl. He knew he needed to be a good role model. She needed someone to help her navigate through the crazy times in her life. He couldn't keep killing and fighting. She would never learn how to be a formidable member of society. She would see violence as a means to an end.
He let Becca and Ellie exchange their gifts first. Becca got Ellie a another art set, which was bigger and better than the last time. Betsy helped Becca retrieve art supplies through one of her friends in a neighboring town. She would forever be indebted to that woman.
Ellie gave Becca another stethoscope, which she absolutely needed. Hers was on its last leg. She didn't ask where she got it. Some things were best not knowing.
It was Joel's turn for gifts. He took a deep breath to gather his nerves and brought the gifts out from under the tree. He handed Ellie a large box and Becca a smaller one.
Ellie tore apart the wrapper to get to the box. She opened up the lid, her eyes widening when she saw all the comic books. She shook her head and laughed incredulously,'This is so fuckin cool!' She leaned over Becca and hugged Joel tightly,'Thanks, man.'
Joel nodded and laughed, stroking her hair,'You're welcome.'
'Let me guess.' Becca smirked,'You know I guy?'
His grin said it all. She shook her head as she opened up her gift. She opened up the lid of the box, her eyes widening when she saw the small horse charms. They were silver and could easily fit onto her necklace with her wedding band.
She delicately picked them up and shook her head in awe,'Dusty and Sadie.'
He nodded as he pointed to the one in her left hand,'I think this one looks like Sadie.'
She smiled tearfully and nodded,'I think so too.'
She sat up and was sitting halfway in his lap as she wrapped her arms around him,'I love these so much. Thank you.' She held his face in her hands as she kissed his cheeks,'I love you.'
He rubbed her back as she kissed all over his face,'Love ya too, darlin.'
Ellie smiled to herself as she watched them. It was hard to believe just four years ago they could barely speak two words to each other without arguing, but now they couldn't keep their hands off each other. She was happy for them. They deserved to find happiness.
She knew Joel was lonely. As soon as she first laid eyes on Becca, she knew this would be someone special to them. She's always been a good judge of character and could read people easily. She didn't trust her at first, but she didn't trust anyone. Not even Joel for awhile. It took a while for him to earn it. She was glad she trusted her instincts.
After a big Christmas dinner, Ellie went to Lizzie's to exchange gifts with her. Becca and Joel went out onto the porch to watch the snow fall.
He was strumming his guitar idly as she sat next to him, listening to the soft music. It was cold outside, but the fresh mountain air felt nice. As she stared out into the mountains, she thought about Bruce. He was lying up in the ground all alone on Christmas Day.
She shook her head of those thoughts. She was doing it again. She shouldn't feel shame for what they did. God knows what he would've done to her if Joel didn't walk in the barn that night.
She turned her attention away from the mountains. She wouldn't let ghosts haunt her tonight. Best to keep sone secrets buried forever.
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Three months later…
Joel was cleaning out the guest bedroom. He didn't know why he was doing it. It felt too cluttered. He was thinking of clearing it completely out just in case. They've been all over each other nearly everyday. He always came inside her. He never wrapped up (he didn't think condoms or contraceptives were a thing anymore anyway).
He used to think marriage and the whole loss things weren't for him. After Sarah died, he assumed he would either die by his own hand or someone else's he pissed off. He never thought he would have any of thus. Now that he had it, he wouldn't give it up for the world.
He wanted kids with Becca. He wasn't naive. He was older and his sperm might not take, but he was willing to try. A little piece of her and a little piece of him. Yeah, he couldn't definitely picture that.
He was clearing out the closet when he found a box. He saw Becca's name on it, but didn't recognize the handwriting. It wasn't hers. She wrote neatly. This looked like a quick scrawl.
He knew he shouldn't look, but he couldn't help himself. He's never seen this box before. As far as he knew, all of her stuff was in their room.
He lifted the lid of the box and saw a very recognizable uniform. His heart started pounding as he looked at the badge.
Rebecca Wilder.
That was her last name from marriage. How old was this shit? He picked up a leather bound journal and opened it, leafing through the pages. He felt the rage flare up in him. They were notes on Ellie from every single day she was here. She was keeping tabs on her.
Tears blurred his vision as he shook his head in disbelief,'No no no. Please no.'
His hands shook as he grabbed the box and fled the room with it. He was angry, hurt and sad. He thought she was different. She was his wife. He shared everything with her. She knew everything about them.
He loved this woman with all his heart and she betrayed him. Just like every person that's come into his life. It seemed like Ellie was the only person he could rely on.
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When Becca walked out of the hospital, she felt excited and nervous. She was more nervous than anything.
She had been getting sick every morning for the past two weeks. She would get dizzy and nauseous throughout the day. It only went away when she ate something. She told herself it was stress and her body adjusting after healing from the gunshot wound.
When she didn't get her period after being like a clockwork since her teenage years; she knew what was going on. She didn't need to be a nurse. She knew the telltale signs, but didn't want to admit it.
She went to the only person she trusted. Sharon. She confided to her in secret, knowing Sharon would never break her doctor/patient confidentiality. She didn't want anyone to know until Joel and Ellie found out.
Sharon ran numerous tests on her and her suspicions were confirmed. She was pregnant. She was only three months. At least that's what they've guessed. Without the proper medical equipment all she could do was speculate, but there wasn't any doubt about it.
Pregnant.
As she rode back to the house, she kept running through the various scenarios in her mind. Sharon said at her age she was considered a geriatric pregnancy, which made her laugh. She was only thirty eight years old.
She was apprehensive about Joel's reaction. They've talked about having kids. He was open to it. They didn't use any protection and he never pulled out. It was bound to happen sooner or later. He seemed to even look forward to it. It wasn't the ideal time, but she wouldn't worry about that. She was pregnant.
She couldn't believe she was having a baby. She's always wanted to be a mom. After the outbreak, she resigned herself to the fact it will never happen. She didn't want to get pregnant by Ben or David. Even though they both tried to no avail. It wasn't meant to happen with them.
She knew Joel would be a good father. She watched him with Ellie and Sebastian. They adored him. He would carry Sebastian around the farm on his shoulders or take him riding. She knew without a doubt he was the man she was supposed to have kids with. This was a good thing.
She was nervous as she rode up the trail to their house. She placed her hand on her still flat stomach, rubbing it soothingly. He was going to be so happy. She just knew it. He would be scared. They both would be, but they could do this. There wasn't anything they couldn't do together.
She saw Joel and Ellie standing on the porch with Tommy. She started to get scared as she saw the grave looks on their faces. She wondered who died now. Did they find Bruce? Would they have to leave?
Joel was off the porch before she even got off the horse. His face was red and wet with tears as he came charging toward her holding a box and a gun. Tommy and Ellie were running after him, pleading for him not to shoot.
Becca leaned back against Sadie and shook her head,'Joel, what's going on?'
Joel laughed as he brandished the gun in front of her face,'Like you don't fuckin know! Did you think I wouldn't know?'
She stared at the box in his hands and frowned, shaking her head,'I don't know what you're talking about. I'm sorry, but I don't.' She took a step closer to him and tried to touch his arm,'Baby, please.
'Don't you baby me you fuckin bitch.' He laughed and shook his head,'You really made me believe ya. Ya know that? You're a damn fine actress. You…I…' He broke down as he cocked the gun,'I shoulda listen to my instincts and killed ya back at Silver Lake.
She broke down into sobs. She was so confused. She didn't know what was going on. She was happy a few moments ago. She thought this would be a good day. Not a day where her husband has a gun pointed at her face.
'I don't know what's going on.' She pleaded as she looked at Ellie and Tommy, 'What's going on?'
Ellie sneered at her disgustedly and shook her head sadly,'You're a fuckin liar. If Joel doesn't kill you I'll do it myself.'
Tommy frowned as he looked at Becca sympathetically. He placed his hands on Ellie's shoulders, whispering,'Just calm down. It's okay.
She could tell he was sorely disappointed and saddened with her. What the hell did she do? She could bear Joel wanting nothing to do with her, but Ellie too? Even Tommy couldn't look at her.
'What did I do?' She pleaded as tears fell down her cheeks,'Please tell me what I did.'
Joel threw the box at her disgustedly, 'Maybe this will refresh your memory.'
She stared down at the ground, seeing the uniform and journal on the ground.
Her eyes widened as she looked up at them. Suddenly, she understood their anger.
Firefly.
They thought she was a Firefly? She didn't recognize any of this stuff, but it had her name all over it. She was confused. How could she defend herself with irrefutable evidence?