Chapter 72: The Wire
'Only in the shattering can the rebuilding occur.'
Barbara Marciniak
What was left of the townsfolk all bunkered down in the lobby of the hospital. There were sleeping bags and blankets everywhere. They didn't know if it was safe to go back to their homes. Some residential buildings were bombed.
Joel vowed to each and every one of them he would make sure they rebuilt what was broken. He became a reluctant leader to the motley crew. They looked to him for guidance and answers when even himself didn't have a goddamn clue.
He was reeling with loss himself. Now that the adrenaline wore off he could finally let himself process everything. The betrayal and death of his younger brother. His only sibling.
His child would renew their bloodline and carry it own. Him and Sebastian. Hopefully they could become as close as brothers.
Maria kept to herself with Sebastian. No one bothered her. They understood her need to be alone and process everything too. She lost her husband and father of her child. Done by her own hands. To save him of all people.
He would forever be indebted to her. She would shrug it off, but they understood each other. She loved him enough as a brother to defend him. Loyalty runs deep to him. A man's only as good as his word.
Joel walked outside of the hospital for a moment, needing a breather from the smell of sadness, soot and death. He breathed in the air and frowned. The stench of death was all around him, making him feel sick to his stomach.
He scrubbed a shaky hand over his face. It was times like these when he needed a drink the most. He's been one year clean and sober, but the hunger peaks every once in awhile.
He's vulnerable and grieving the loss of his brother deeply. Tears fell down his cheeks as Tommy's death was reminiscent of Sarah's death. He couldn't save either one of them. Yet another great loss of his life.
Even the urge to drink was strong he remembered all the things he had to live for. His beautiful wife who was pregnant with his child. Ellie, who's become like a daughter to him. She even took his last name. He cherished his newfound family.
He included Maria and Betsy. Am was always along for the ride. The kid was smart. He could be another Richard.
He wouldn't let his demons win tonight. He wouldn't give in. He could very well drink tomorrow, but he took it day by day.
Joel sighed deeply as he looked around at all the dead bodies. They would burn the dead and bury those who mattered.
His eyes darted over to the jailhouse where the council awaited their impending deaths. He would have a front row seat to their execution. He would take great pleasure in watching them slowly die. They tried to take what he cherished. They deserved to burn in Hell.
He shook his head and closed his eyes. He needed to be with his wife and Ellie. He needed to know they were okay too.
Being heavily pregnant Becca was moved to a room. He noticed she was in pain and Peter wanted to monitor her and the baby. The doctor said it was because of the stress. She said she just wanted to eat.
Joel walked into the hospital and down to her room. She was still wearing her clothes and laying in the bed. Ellie was stretched out alongside her. A woman always needed their mother no matter what age they are. The teenager suffered a great loss. She finally recovered from the loss of Riley only to lose Lizzie so tragically. Hasn't she suffered enough?
He walked inside and smiled when he saw her wide awake. Her face was smudged with soot and dirt, but she's never looked more beautiful to him. She looked alive.
They actually made it. Not without some tremendous losses, but they made it through on the other side. Just like they vowed to each other in that barn. He kept his promise to Ellie to keep her safe. Their baby was alive and thriving inside her womb.
He would rebuild their home and make it new again. Their baby would grow up in a proper family. One neither of them ever had. They didn't lie to each other. There was no need to. They knew every facet of each other and still stuck around.
She knew of his dangerous past. He did a lot of things he wasn't proud of. He's killed a lot of men. Some innocent if he were being honest. He's stole and committed heinous crimes that gave Tommy nightmares.
She accepted all of that. Just as he accepted her past. She still grappled with the memories of living under David's rule of thumb. He knew of her panic attacks. Moments where she thought she was back in the cult. He helped her through all that. He loved her through it just as she helped him with his addiction. She helped him cope in those moments of despair.
The love he felt for her ran deep in his bones. She coursed through his blood. He wished he had more time to love her.
He walked over to her bedside and pulled the chair close to her. Both of his hands gripped hers tightly. He brought her hand up to his mouth as his tears fell on their knuckles. He could do this with her. Be vulnerable.
Her hand tangled in his hair and it was like in that moment she absolved him of all his sins. He could make a fresh start and give a better life to his family. They all deserved peace and happiness for the rest of their lives. They've fought enough.
He looked up at her, his face probably a mess with tears.'We did it.' He whispered brokenly, tired and weary,'We did it, baby.'
Becca closed her eyes as tears fell down her cheeks, whispering,'Lizzie…' She shook her head,'Tommy?'
He couldn't help but smile wryly, making sure to keep his voice as not to wake Ellie,'And here we thought I was the naysayer.' He frowned and leaned in close to her, whispering,'Ain't none of that shit matters anymore. Come sunrise they'll be gone and nothing left.'
She nodded as she looked over his face.'And we'll get our happily ever after?'
He snorted and shook his head,'I ain't no prince, baby.' He huffed,'Ain't no knight in shining armor neither.'
'Of course not.' She smirked,'You've been the damsel in distress a time or two.'
He watched as she bit her bottom lip to suppress her grin. He was happy to see she still had her sass. She grieved for many as did he, but they've come to cope with loss. Ellie would heal in her own time. The cycle would begin again.
He stared down at Ellie's sleeping form and frowned,'Is she okay?'
'She will be.' Becca nodded and smiled sadly, stroking her hair,'She's strong. She'll push forward. Endure.'
Joel pressed his forehead against hers, whispering,'No more fighting. No more. Our baby can't take it.'
'Baby's fine.' She reminded him gently,'Its your kid. Determined more than ever to break my balls.'
He snorted and laid his head against her side. His head was almost touching Ellie's. He could hear the eurythmic sound of the baby's heartbeat.
This is what they fought so hard for. It's a shame his own brother had to die, making Maria a widow once again.
She and Becca had that in common. Both windows twice. Hopefully Becca found her forever with Joel. He was still hung up on their age, but she could go before him. Life is unpredictable that way.
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Becca was well enough come morning to see the grand finale. She washed her face and combed her hair. She wanted to make herself presentable as they made a man dead to rights. She could finally see justice served.
She wouldn't have to look over her shoulder anymore. There would be no more fear. She could finally be at peace.
Hopefully anyway.
Ellie had gone along with Joel, needing the distraction. It gave Becca some time to think and reflect. She was nervous. Not for the future but for her own peace of mind.
She took a deep breath and walked out of her room. Their child was wildly kicking around inside her. The baby was nervous too.
She rubbed her stomach soothingly as she walked down the hallway and outside. The sun was just beginning to rise. The last of the townsfolk were already gathered in the courtyard. They looked eager to see justice served as well.
She looked around the crowd for Joel and instantly spotted him standing outside the courthouse with Kevin. Ellie was standing with Betsy.
Becca's eyes filled with tears at the devastated look on Ellie's face. She was far too young to know such sadness and loss. She made a silent vow to always support her through thick and thin. She would love her unconditionally.
Just as mothers do. She's realized she didn't have to be afraid of being a mother to her unborn child. She was already a mother to Ellie. She showed her what it meant to love someone so strong and deeply, you feel as if you'll collapse from the weight of it.
Becca's eyes met Ellie's and she waved at her, smiling warmly. She jerked her head over towards Joel, who's become her father.
Ellie nodded silently and gave her a small smile. Sometimes they said so much without saying anything at all.
They've lived and survived to tell the tale. Their grandkids would regale stories of their bravery. Their survival. They didn't want to be heroes. All they've ever wanted is to be free.
They could have that now. If they wanted it. They didn't come all this way for nothing.
Becca walked over to Joel and Kevin. She averted her eyes between the two men. They were like night and day.
Kevin was capable, but he was a novice. She was sad about Harold's death. He turned out to be a good guy. He fought so hard for them. For his family and town.
His wife fell down onto her knees when she heard the news of his passing. Her gut wrenching cries echoed throughout the hospital. Her wails could be heard from outside.
Becca will never forget that as long as she loved. She feel guilty for some reason. Hee man survived, but hers didn't. The selfish part of her was grateful. She would react just as Harold's wife did. She couldn't think about losing him like that. It hurt too much.
She knew he would go eventually, but not today and certainly not tomorrow. He was alive. They could finally live peacefully on the ranch like they wanted to. She could have the baby and they could live out the rest of their lives without fighting. They were so damned tired of fighting.
Joel's eyes lit up when he saw her. They always did. She would never get over how excited he always was to see her. He looked at her as if he were seeing her for the first time. He made her feel loved. Appreciated. Cherished.
She's never had that with any other man before. She never will again. He's the first and last. He was it for her. She went through all the turmoil, staying with men that didn't deserve her. They controlled her.
Joel gave her choices. They've made mistakes along the way, but they've made amends. Their was their time to begin the rest of their lives.
He wrapped his arm around her shoulders and looked up at Kevin,'I'll be over in a minute.'
Kevin nodded as he tipped his hat to Becca,'Good morning, Mrs. Miller.'
'Becca.' She nodded,'Good morning, Kevin.'
Kevin cleared his throat and nodded,'Understood. I'm gonna get things ready.'
Kevin ran over to the wooden plank. She saw the five ropes. One for each member of the council. One for Francis.
Joel, Kevin and a few other men executed the captured soldiers. They made sure to torture them first for any information.
Becca didn't ask Joel what transpired overnight. All she knew is that he came into her hospital room, his hands covered in blood she knew wasn't his own.
He did what must be done to protect his family. He was a good man. An honorable one in her opinion. He was fiercely loyal. He chose his family over his own brother. Surely, Tommy made that decision for himself.
Joel placed his hand on her stomach openly and freely,'You feeling up to this?'
'Yeah.' He cupped her cheek and she leaned into his gloved hand, relishing in the warmth of it,'I need to see it for myself. To know they're not going to come for us again.'
'I'm gonna do it.' He whispered fiercely to her. His eyes searching her face,'You're gonna watch me kill 'em.' He nodded,'And El.' He blinked away tears,'Then this will be the last time we ever gotta do any of this shit. We can focus on rebuilding.'
Her eyes widened slightly. She liked how he took on a leadership role more comfortably. Kevin teased Joel becoming Sheriff. He didn't want it. He just wanted to be a sheep rancher. He would help rebuild the town, but he would work just as he did before. Kevin was more suited for the role anyway. He practically looked the part.
She closed her eyes and sighed, whispering,'We gotta be there for Ellie. She's really hurting.'
'I know.' He frowned,'We're gonna have a funeral for Lizzie. Me and Betsy talked about it. She deserved that. I think Ellie would like a place to visit her as well.' He swallowed the lump in his throat,'We can bury her on the farm. Where Ellie can visit her whenever she wants to.'
Becca nodded and held his face in her hands,'Honey, that's so sweet.' She smiled through her tears,'You can be so sweet sometimes.'
He shrugged nonchalantly but had a smirk on his face.'Don't tell anyone. It'll kill my vibe as Ellie likes to call it.'
She shook her head in disbelief, whispering,'We're about to hang people and we're laughing about it.'
'Should we be crying?' He snorted,'Cause they sure as fuck weren't crying when they killed all those goddamned kids. I saw that, Becca. Ellie saw that.' He shook his head,'No, they thought we were all a fuckin joke.' He narrowed his eyes,'We get the last laugh. Life's tricky like that. You get what ya put into this world. Sometimes an eye for an eye is the only way to fully resolve something for good.'
She sometimes forgot how detached he could make himself sometimes. She knew he could be cruel. She had experienced and been a witness to his ire. He pointed a gun to her head once or twice. She lived to tell the tale.
He once said he could never kill her. His love for her outweighed his anger towards her in that moment. She was his only weakness.
He saw the confusion on her face and sighed, pressing his forehead against hers,'You want someone else to do it?'
'No.' She steeled her features and swallowed the lump in her throat,'It has to be you. You and I both know that. But after this. No more killing. No more fighting.'
'No more, baby.' He kissed her lips tenderly, whispering,'No more.'
She leaned back from him, her eyes looking over his face,'What about Tommy?'
'What about him?' He shrugged,'Its up to Maria what she wants to do with him.'
She nodded and gave him a small smile,'I agree.' She gave his hand a tight squeeze, whispering,'After this let's get back to the ranch and assess the damage.' She smiled softly,'I miss the animals and fun chaos on the farm. Can we get alpacas?' She cocked her head to the side,'You think we can find one?'
He smirked and shook his head,'You're scheming. That means trouble. Meaning you're sending me on an adventure.'
'No more adventures either.' She frowned,'You're never leaving my sight again. We got kids to raise together.'
He nodded and smiled softly,'Yes, mame.'
Kevin called out his name and he sighed,'Duty calls.'
She nodded and leaned up to kiss his lips, whispering,'You're a good man.'
Tears filled his eyes and he laughed, shaking his head,'You say that like ya mean it.'
She narrowed her eyes at him, her face stern,'I do.'
She didn't leave him any room to argue. She rarely ever did. It was one of the things he loved about her. She was the only woman to render him speechless.
Becca gave his hand another squeeze before leaning up to kiss his cheek, whispering,'I always will.'
Joel's eyes widened as she walked away and into the crowd to join Ellie and Betsy. Maria chose to stay behind with Seb. She was still grieving her husband. Or who she thought he was anyway.
Joel took a deep breath as he lowered the brim of his hat, covering the tears in his eyes. He felt almost ashamed. He was a step above the man he thought he was. He used to watch hangings back in Boston with indifference. Now he was the self righteous man.
He looked out onto the crowd. Almost the entire town came out to watch the hangings. He was also mesmerized by the sea of faces. Young and old.
He walked out onto the plank, standing by the pulley. He looked down to the trap doors below the ropes. He morbidly heard Am bragging about the engineering of it.
His eyes scanned the crowd and he saw Becca standing with Ellie. Their arms wrapped around each other. His eyes met Becca's and she gave him a small nod. Tears were in her eyes, but she had a soft smile on her face.
He just had to get through this. Then everything else will be alright. He could be happy.
He saw everyone's heads turn and gasps. He knew what was coming. The guests of honor.
The crowd parted as Kevin led the council through the throngs of people. The townsfolk shouted obscenities, spit and shoved at them. He understood their anger. They took their children, their wives and husbands from them. All in the name of a useless 'cure'. So many innocent lives experimented on line they were lab rats. They deserved to be treated like trash.
Becca. Ellie and Betsy stood still. They didn't react. It wouldn't change anything anyway.
Francis was brought up onto the plank first. He had a grave look on his face. As if reality was setting in. He realized his life was over. It meant nothing. He wouldn't die as a hero or martyr. The cause would die with him. He would be forgotten. That was a mortal death for an arrogant man like him.
He didn't understand how Becca shared his blood. She was nothing like him. She was inherently good. She truly cared about people.
Francis's eyes met his. Joel's gaze never wavered. He wanted to make sure he knew he was the man taking his life. He didn't win.
Francis thought he wasn't worthy of Becca. Maybe in some way he was right. He wouldn't stop trying though.
The council were each brought to a looped rope. Joel made sure the nooses were done correctly. He's had to teach a man a lesson a time or two.
Sharon's face was resolute, like she was happy to finally see it come to an end. Maybe she could see Richard again. Maybe he found someway to forgive her. Contrary to what people thought she did love the man.
The priest walked up onto the plank before the council.
Becca looked up at the man of God warily. Ever since she escaped David, she's never been very good around Priests or Pastors. It's why she asked Betsy to officiate her and Joel's wedding. She didn't feel comfortable with prayers. Maybe one day she could have a better relationship with God.
It was a funny thing. She grew up as a Southern Baptist. Religion was deeply practiced in her home. Her parents met in the church. It's where she met Ben as well. It seemed her whole entire life was indoctrinated with religion. It was used a means to control her. Never again.
After the Priest said his prayer, he read them their rights. The townsfolk clung to his every word. Becca met Joel's gaze across the crowd. He saw the uncomfortable look on his wife's face and he didn't like it. Not one bit.
He knew religion wasn't a discussed topic in their home. Ellie was a staunch atheist while he grew up Catholic; he didn't consider himself a religious man. The last time he prayed was when Becca was shot. He truly thought he was going to lose her that night. He never wanted to feel that kind of fear ever again.
Once the Priest was finished, Kevin asked the council if they wanted to say anything.
Francis held his head up high. His chin raised in arrogance. Even now he thought he was better than them. He would go to hell thinking that.
Francis kept his eyes focused on Becca and chuckled, shaking his head,'You're all making a big mistake. When I'm dead and gone and this virus takes over every last one of you. You're going to wish I was here to set things right.'
Becca turned her head and sighed. She brought Ellie close to her as she kept her arms wrapped around her. She knew what Francis is doing. He's trying to get the last word. He could say whatever he wanted. It doesn't change the fact of what's to happen to him. He would get what he deserved.
Kevin and a few other men placed the black hoods over their faces to cover them. They slid their heads into the nooses, making sure they were wrapped tightly around their neck.
Joel looked over at Becca and Ellie, who were staring at the council with rapt attention. They were affected by this too. Ellie had Lizzie taken from her while Becca's been lied to her entire life by the people she trusted. He refused to be another person that failed them in life.
He took a deep breath as Kevin nodded to him, giving him the go ahead. He pulled on the first rope, opening the trap door as the man fell through. It pulled on the next and the next. He didn't even feel remorse as he watched Sharon's body fall through the door.
He jerked hard on Francis's rope. He heard the man gasp as his body fell down into the trap door. He gritted his teeth as he pulled hard on his rope, listening as he struggled to grasp for breath.
Becca watched with tears in her eyes as the council's bodies flailed like fish out of water. Sharon's body started to become limp as she stopped squirming. It was taking a considerable amount of time for them to die. She wondered if it was done on purpose.
As she watched her grandfather's body become still, she didn't feel sad or regretful like she thought she would. She felt nothing but relief. It was finally over. They could never hurt them again.
There was always a possibility there were others out there to continue the cause, but they would deal with it as it comes. Just as they've done many times before.
Once the council were good and dead, Joel, Kevin and the rest of them took their bodies to be burned along with the rest.
Ellie went back to the hospital with Becca and Betsy. She seemed to want to stay close to them, which was understandable. She was still grieving. She would make sure Lizzie received a beautiful send off. It was a shame she had to die so tragically and for nothing.
She and Joel were going to take her in. They would protect her just as they did Ellie. They've failed both of them.
Becca asked around for Maria and was told she was in the chapel.
Becca's stomach was in knots as she walked to the hospital chapel. She's never been inside any house of worship in over five years. Ever since she left Silver Lake. She knew she needed to do this. Maria wasn't just her friend. She was her sister.
She stood in front of the chapel and took a deep breath to gather her nerves. She gripped the doorknob and rolled her eyes. It was only a chapel. She was being ridiculous. She hated Ben and David for making her afraid to believe in faith. They made her doubt herself.
Deciding to bite the bullet, she opened the door. She found Maria sitting on the front pew with a sleeping Seb in her arms.
Becca warily looked up at the crucifix on the wall and the image of Jesus staring into her soul. The walls were covered in the crucifixion of Jesus Christ along with the Saints of Healing.
She could hear her heart pounding in her ears as she walked down the aisle.
Maria's eyes widened up at her as she sat down next to her,'I didn't expect to see you here.' She snorted,'I thought you were an atheist.'
She shook her head and gave her a small smile,'Not an atheist. I prefer to call myself agnostic. I'm spiritual, but…' She looked up at the cross and sighed,'I'm not ready to put a name to it yet.' She placed her hand on her leg,'I came here to see if you're doing alright. Is there anything I can do for you?'
'Yeah.' Maria nodded and scoffed,'Can you rewind the last ten years of my life? Before I met him.' Tears fell down her cheeks as she looked down at her sleeping son,'Before I married him and had a baby with him.'
Becca sighed as she leaned back against the pew. The hard wood didn't do her sore back any favors,'I'm not going to sit here and pretend to know what it's like for you.' She looked up at her as tears filled her eyes,'I do know what's it like to put all your faith into someone only for them to let you down.' She pursed her lips and shook her head,'When I lost Ben, I was devastated sure, but I was also relieved. Before the outbreak I knew we weren't going to make it.'
'Why did you marry him and stay with him?' Maria frowned,'Why not just end it if he cheated and beat on you?'
Becca folded her hands in her lap and shrugged,'I was raised to believe divorce is a sin. When his mama saw the bruises he gave me she wasn't even angry at him. You know what she did? She asked him what I did wrong? Me.' She saw Maria's eyes widen as she nodded,'After the outbreak we were…the only ones left and we stuck to each other. He didn't change. He became meaner and…more violent. He was obsessed with religion, which brought us to Silver Lake. When David killed Ben I was relieved. I tried to escape, but David found me and…whipped me with a leather belt over a dozen times in front of his entire congregation.'
Maria sat there stunned as she listened to her. She knew bits and pieces of what Becca endured, but she never told her the whole story. She figured only Joel and Ellie would know, but she was trusting her with this information.
'What happened after that?'
Becca averted her eyes downward and sighed shakily, whispering,'He made me marry him. He forced me to do horrible things. He humiliated me in every way a person can be. When Ellie killed him I felt like I was finally free.' She looked up at Maria, her eyes staring deeply into hers,'I know you may not believe it right now, but you were spared from all that. You took your control back. Not even I could've done that.'
'It had to be me.' Maria sniffled softly as she kissed the top of Seb's head,'I just never thought he could be capable of something like that. I thought he really was a good man, Becca.'
'He seemed to be at one point.' She wrapped her arm around her shoulders,'I don't think people are born bad. It's their circumstances that make them do bad things.'
Maria sighed and shook her head,'Joel's a good man. It's why I couldn't let Tommy kill him.' She cleared her throat, whispering admittedly,'I always had a suspicion Tommy shot you that night.' Becca's eyes widened as she continued,'During the time I knew you and Joel were having a special night. Tommy left the house. He said he had something to take care of in town. He showed up two hours later and told me you were shot. I didn't want to believe it, but after all this? I know it was him.' She winced as fresh tears filled her eyes,'I was so stupid.'
Becca frowned as Maria broke down into sobs. She cradled the side of her head and brought it her shoulder,'You're not stupid. You loved him and saw the good in him. There's nothing wrong with that. We're at fault for that.'
'I killed my husband. The father of our child.' She stared up at her as tears fell down her face,'What's Seb gonna think about that when he's older?'
'That his mama is a damned strong woman who protected her family.' Becca shook her head and stroked her cheek,'Remember what you said to me when I came here five years ago all broken and beat up?' She waited for Maria to shake her head,'You told me that the people who can hurt you the most are the ones you trust. You told me I was a strong woman. I didn't believe it, but you saw that in me. Just as I see it in you.' She nodded,'You're going to be just fine. You have your family. You're still a Miller.'
Maria smiled tearfully and nodded,'I'm glad I have good people in my corner.'
Becca stroked the back of Seb's head,'We take care of each other. You and Betsy are going to deliver my baby.' She nodded,'I won't tell anyone about Tommy shooting me. I think Joel suspects it anyway, but I'll keep it between us.'
Maria sighed in relief and nodded,'Thank you.' She swallowed harshly as she looked over her face,'Joel asked me what I wanted to do with Tommy's body.' She stared down at their son and sighed,'I think it'll be good to bury him in the cemetery. Just so Seb can go visit him if he wants to. He was a good father. I'll give him that.'
'I don't doubt it.' Becca quickly wiped the tears from her eyes,'Joel will see to it that it gets done. It's okay if you want to visit him too. No one would fault you for that.'
She rubbed Seb's back soothingly and shrugged,'Maybe. I…need some time to process things. I really thought I knew him. I thought I was going to spend the rest of my life with him. A stranger.' She took a deep breath to compose herself,'I'm sure Joel's tore up about it.'
Becca nodded and sighed,'I'm sure he is, but he's focus on other things right now. You know how he is. He'll grieve later. When everything settles down.'
Maria and Becca shared a look. They both knew it would be awhile before the dust settled. Some people would never be the same. They all came out of this a little damaged, but they would persevere. Just as they've always done.
Becca got up from the pew and held out her hand,'Come on. This place is too depressing. You need to come eat.'
Maria smiled softly as she took her hand. She was grateful to have family and friends to lean on. She didn't know what she would've done if she had to go through this alone. She couldn't imagine how Becca coped with it all and still managed to have faith in humanity.
Joel seemed to be the light in her otherwise bleak world of pitiful men. He seemed like something she's never had before. Respect. He truly respected her, which is why Maria came to trust him. He's fucked up, but he's made his penance and Becca forgave him. She didn't make it easy on him though.
Maria thought her and Tommy had something special like that, but she had been very wrong. She was always on the lookout for Joel to fuck up. She never realized her own husband was betraying her. He stabbed her in the back.
It made her doubt everything he ever said to her. Did he even love her at all? Not all of it could've been fake.
She couldn't think about the what ifs anymore. She had to push forward. For her son. She didn't have to do it alone.
It takes a village.
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Becca and Ellie stayed in her old apartment by the hospital while Joel assessed the damage at the ranch. He was also cleaning it up as well. He had forgotten about Aaron's head being in the living room. That had been a pleasant surprise to walk into.
He cleaned the carpets and aired out the house. Luckily, the second floor didn't have any damage except holes in the floors from the bullets. He could easily fix them. The damage wasn't as bad as he thought. He would have to repair the windows and doors, fix the holes on the walls, ceilings and floors, but nothing that couldn't easily be fixed.
He walked out onto the porch, looking out at his sheep and goats. Even though Jackson was put through turmoil, life still goes on. There was still work that needed to be done.
He thought about Tommy and felt that clench in his chest. He should be here alongside of him, helping him repair and rebuild. They were supposed to raise their kids together. Go on fishing trips and teach their kids all the things they used to enjoy growing up. They could teach them about their Chilean culture.
All that was thrown down the drain for nothing. He chose a madman scientist over his flesh and blood. His wife and kid. He was willing to sacrifice their lives. He got Maria pregnant just so he could deliver them on a silver platter to Francis.
Joel could feel the tears stinging his eyes. He closed his eyes and wiped the tears away. He felt like a pussy. He was devastated, lost and confused. He missed his brother terribly, but hated what he became. He was conflicted.
He wanted a fucking drink or a smoke. It's been so long since he's had either. It would take the edge off. He wondered if that bottle of whiskey was still on the top shelf. It was a gift from Betsy. She had been unaware of his addictions, but he accepted it gracefully. It was from the old country. Just like his Abuela used to drink when everyone went to bed.
His tongue lolled around in his dry mouth. He could almost taste it. His hands clenched into tight fists as he tried to fight back the urge, but it overwhelmed him. His demons preyed on his vulnerability.
He was just about to walk inside and grab it when he saw Becca and Ellie heading down the trail on horseback. He let out a sigh of relief. He almost fucking did it. He almost relapsed after being two years sober. All that hard work for nothing.
He shook his head. No. It wasn't for nothing. Take it day by day.
He walked off the porch as their horses came up to the house. As he looked at them he was reminded of his reasons for staying sober. People relied on him as a husband and father.
From here on out he was turning on a new page on life. He would be that sheep farmer he always dreamt of. He would love his woman fiercely and protect his children to the best of his ability, making sure no harm came to them.
He helped Becca off her horse as Ellie hopped off hers and ran over to the sheep.
Becca looked back at her and smiled softly,'She was excited to come and see the animals. They'll be good for her right now.'
Joel sighed exasperating and placed his hands on his hips,'I thought I told ya both to stay put while I cleaned up?'
She smirked as she wrapped her arms around his waist,'No way. It's boring there and all of our stuffs here.' She rolled her eyes at the annoyed look on his face,'I can clean up too. I'm pregnant not crippled.' She gently patted her stomach,'Just six more weeks to go, buckeroo.'
His eyes widened as he gently placed Gus hands on her stomach, shaking his head in disbelief,'It seems like yesterday when ya were telling me you were pregnant.'
'Yeah well.' She shrugged.'Time flies when you're having fun.'
He snorted and bent down, resting his forehead against hers,'We've had fun together too. It hasn't all been bad right?'
'No.' She shook her head and smiled softly, holding his face in her hands,'We've had a lot of fun times. It's just beginning, baby. You know that right?'
He closed his eyes as he nuzzled his nose against hers, whispering,'All I wanna do is wake up to ya and go to bed to ya at night. Every night for the rest of our lives. I wanna lay my head down with my woman and know our babies are safe and sound. Happy.'
'They will be.' She looked over to Ellie who was playing with their Border Collie, Theo. Joel found him on a hunting trip. He was a good dog. Smart and a hell of a sheep wrangler. He was also Ellie's best friend. She had her arms wrapped around the dog as he licked her face.
'Theo will be good for her, I think.' Becca rubbed his sides,'She needs some time alone to heal. Give her some distance and…grace. She'll come to us when she's ready.'
He sighed as his eyes cut over to their oldest child, but she wasn't a little girl anymore. She's seen and been through too much. She was about to turn nineteen. She was a full fledged woman. Yet she chose to stay with them. It was fine by them. Where else could she go anyway? College? Study abroad?
He turned back to Becca and rubbed his gloves hands over her stomach, whispering,'Upstairs is perfectly fine. Only thing is the wiring.' He sighed,'It'll take me a couple days to repair that.'
She frowned and leaned against him,'Okay, I can stand living in the apartment for a couple more days.' She smirked,'It used to be my old stomping grounds.'
He smiled fondly as he looked over her face. So much has happened since then. They've pushed and fought against each other for over three years before truly committing to one another.
When they both met back at Silver Lake, they never expected to find a love like this. They had been both lost and broken. They weren't in the right frame of mind to love anyone, but fate had other ideas.
They finally got their shit together. They fought the 'good' fight. Some called it a civil war. It would be a story for the ages. He called it a fucking inconvenience.
Becca looked around at her garden and frowned,'I've neglected them.' She pursed her lips and shook her head,'Lizzie needs fresh flowers for her grave.'
Joel cleared his throat and nodded,'That she does. I'm sure whatever ya make will be beautiful.' His eyes looked over her face, smiling softly,'Anything you make is beautiful, darlin.'
She blushed as his gloved hand stroked her cheek. His voice was rough like gravel and smooth like a freight train. His hand was placed on her stomach when he said that, bringing tears to her eyes.
She shook her head and chuckled softly, whispering,'You're trouble.'
He licked his lips as he leaned in close to her,'I haven't gotten in trouble in awhile.'
Her eyes met his and she saw the raw news in them. She remembered his promise to her. Arrowhead. Once this is all over they would head to the cabin and seclude themselves for the weekend. She wondered if he still remembered that.
She was being selfish. There was far too much work to be done. They had funerals to prepare, people to bury and houses to rebuild. All the while making repairs on their own home.
She was supposed to do this all while pregnant. She would've dare complain. She was alive. She made it through.
She could bandage up injured, sweep and paint. She was capable.
Today though. She would cater to the garden. She would nurture the flowers honoring Lizzie's life and the others who sacrificed their lives to help them.
She leaned up and kissed his lips, whispering,'Make sure you actually come to bed this time. Don't be out all night working. I thought this is your time to relax? Do I gotta tie you down?'
His eyes lit up and he smirked,'I thought you'd never ask.' He shrugged as she rolled her eyes,'Hey, if that's what you're into. I ain't judging. Been on the giving and receiving end a time or two.'
Her eyes widened and her cheeks reddened. She knew what he was referring to. She wondered what other sex he's tried. She was eager to explore that with him, but after the baby is born.
She playfully pushed at his chest and backed aaay way from him,'Now get gone and let me tend to my garden.'
Joel chuckled as he tipped the brim of his baseball cap,'May you oblige me for dinner this evening in the apartment kitchen?'
She slid on her gardening gloves and grinned,'I'll be there.'
He gave her another one of his smokes he reserved for her. The one that reached all the way to his eyes. It made her weak in the knees.
He backed away from her and over to the cows. Work continued on the ranch. There was always something that needed to be done.
Joel had been busy repairing the windows on the ranch. It was almost seven in the evening when he shuffled through the door of the apartment, bare boned tired. He wanted to make sure the ranch was decent for Lizzie's funeral tomorrow. He was also eager to get them back on the farm and out of town.
He placed his bag on the floor and kicked his boots off, calling out,'I'm home! Sorry I'm late!'
'It's only me!' He heard screaming from the kitchen,'Ellie is staying with Betsy!'
He closed his eyes and sighed. He heard the sarcasm in his tone. She didn't seem mad about it. She would break his balls though. He wouldn't expect anything less.
He walked into the kitchen, seeing her sitting at the kitchen table. There were two plates between them. She managed to make a decent meal with what they had.
She crossed her arms over her chest and leaned back in her seat,'I obliged you.'
He sighed and took off his hat, placing it on the counter,'That you did.'
He nodded down to the plates of food,'You do this for us?' He raised his eyes up to look at her,'You think I'm an asshole?'
'No. You're a hard worker.' She shook her head and smiled wryly,'A blessing and a curse. Betsy wanted to take Ellie for the night before the…service.' She shrugged,'We haven't had much time to sit down and talk. Just alone.'
He nodded as he walked over and sat down next to her,'Then can I eat on your cunt after?'
His eyes lowered down to her ample cleavage accentuated by her low cut dress. He cherishes moments like this. She gave him a small moment of normalcy amidst the broken chaos.
He felt like a prick. He remembered Sarah scolding him for being late to breakfast or dinner. Soccer games, dance recitals. Anything that required a single father to be there. He was late to.
She didn't seem angry. Just disappointed .
She cocked her head to the side and pursed her lips,'I don't think you deserve that.' She sighed and shook her head.'I'm not mad. I understand. Rebuilding is important. These people look up to you.'
'I was fixing our ranch.' He frowned,'Of course I've been helping with the rebuild around town.' He cleared his throat,'Lizzie's funeral's tomorrow and we're…having a small service for Tommy.' He shrugged at the surprised look on her face,'It's what Maria wanted. He is my brother.'
Becca's eyes shined with tears as she nodded,'I'll be there with you and Maria.' She took his hand and squeezed it softly, whispering.'I'm sorry about your brother, honey.'
He tightly closed his eyes and shook his head, 'I never woulda thought he would do something like this. My own flesh and blood.'
Becca nodded and snorted,'I mean. Francis was my grandfather.' She cupped his cheek,'We may not grieve the same, but we've both lost family along the way.'
Joel closed his eyes as the tears fell down his face,'I can't believe he's gone.' He tangled his hands in his hair, whispering sobbingly,'Why do I gotta keep losing people?'
'I don't have an answer for that.' She sighed and wrapped her arms around him tightly pulling him close. She bent down and kissed the top of his head, whispering,'It's okay to feel it, Joel. I won't judge you. I'll love you always. Forever.'
He buried his head in her lap and sobbed into her pretty dress. She didn't say a word. She kept her hands in his hair and gently ran her hands through it.
This is what it's all about. Not the sex. Drama, violence or pretty words. Comfort. Action.
He didn't always say he loved her, but she always felt it. She felt throughout the civil war. She felt it even when he denied it, choosing to drown himself in nameless women, booze and pills. He's turned himself around. He wanted more for himself. He wanted the partnership. The foundation and stability knowing someone wasn't going anywhere.
He had that. Rebecca. His wife.
She stayed with him through it all. Even when Ellie didn't trust him, she believed in him.
He's always running from something, but he's put a lot of miles out on his body. He was tired.
He felt the baby push against his hand and his eyes widened,'I'm making the baby do that?'
'I don't know.' She shrugged.'I have no idea what makes the baby do that.' She frowned,'It seems to happen when someone's upset.'
'So it happens a lot?' He frowned.
She shook her head and sighed,'I'm not that far away from birth, Joel. Six weeks isn't that long. I want to have the baby at home.'
'I know.' He curtly nodded and bit back a frown,'I know Betsy and Maria are good midwives, but what if something happens to ya?'
'The hospital is only a minute away.' She shrugged,'The hospital is overwhelmed with the injured. Home is as good a place as any.'
Joel decided to shut his mouth, knowing she made up her mind. Besides, they had funerals to attend first.