Chapter 3

Edward and Winry had gone to bed together. It felt nice to have the shared body heat with it being freezing cold out. Edward figured with Winry being so thin that she needed his body heat to stay warm. It was for a good reason, he figured.

When Alphonse came home later that night from his shift at the hospital, he saw Edward come out of his room. Alphonse sighed when he saw the empty couch.

Edward smiled "Welcome home. I got Winry covered with supplies and clothes. And she's eager to learn so we went over-"

"Are you planning on sleeping with her every night?!" Alphonse interrupted. He looked angry.

"Al, what the hell? It's freezing and she's very thin. She needs the extra heat."

"Well then turn up the radiator."

Edward started getting angry. "She is still going to have those dreams. You know it takes a while to get over them. What's this really about?"

"Brother, you're such an idiot! Do you really want what happened to Noah happen to Winry?"

Edward lunged forward and grabbed Alphonse by the shirt collar. "Don't you dare bring her up!"

Alphonse grabbed Edward's hands. There was a look of fear in Alphonse's eyes that made Edward feel regret.

"I'm sorry," Edward said as he released Alphonse's clothes, and his arms dropped to his side.

Alphonse sighed "Let's calm down. I just don't want Winry to be subjected to the same accusations."

"I don't want that either. But if we send Winry out into the world, she'll end up in a workhouse or even worse, a fucking asylum! She doesn't remember this past year. And she doesn't know anything about this world. I can't do that to her."

Alphonse put his hand gently on Edward's shoulder. "I don't want that either. She needs us now more than ever. But we need to get her a room of her own so we avoid any kind of suggestion."

"But Al, we're locked in a lease until July. And we don't have the money to break it. We're stuck here until then."

Alphonse nodded in agreement. His medical schooling wasn't cheap. "Well, brother. I'm tired. I'm going to bed."

"Me too."

Edward walked back into his room and noticed that Winry was awake.

He heard her voice shake as she whimpered "Do you need me to leave?"

Edward felt his stomach drop. He didn't want her to feel this way at all. He said quietly "No, not at all."

Edward got in bed with her and whispered "Come here."

He coaxed her to move closer to him, and he held her. "We don't want you to leave. But we also don't want you to get hurt. Remember, I told you it looks bad to other people if we are sleeping in the same bed. Well even living together doesn't look great. People act all high and mighty about being pure and being virgins until they get married. But I know they break those rules too. Anyways, someone I know got accused of that and she got really hurt. And I don't want that to happen to you."

"Did they physically hurt her?"

"Oh no. But words can hurt too. They sometimes hurt more than a physical wound. But I want you to stay here. I've missed you."

Winry pulled away from him so she could see his face. "I've missed you too. I didn't think I would see you again."

"Same. Let's get some rest," Edward pulled the blankets over her and they snuggled together. She woke a few more times that night due to the dreams that plagued her mind. But Edward would quietly hush her and give a few comforting words. She seemed to be going back to sleep easier tonight.

A few days later, Alphonse woke up excited. It was Christmas morning, and though it was a new holiday to them, he loved the idea of gift exchange. He gave his cat a new toy, and then he started to make breakfast. He was hoping the sounds and smells of cooking breakfast would wake up Edward and Winry.

And Alphonse was successful. Edward and Winry walked out of their room and were surprised to see Alphonse cooking. Winry had seen Ed cook but she was happy to see that Al could also cook. All those years that he couldn't eat, and now he was cooking a meal in the kitchen. Winry smiled at him.

After breakfast, Alphonse went to his room and hastily brought out the presents. He almost tripped in his excitement. Winry watched the event curiously. Al gave Ed some books and socks. And Ed gave the shirt and underwear to Alphonse but he was most excited about the confections that Edward had gotten him. He loved sweets.

Winry elbowed Ed. "See? I knew he would like them."

Edward rolled his eyes. "Fine. You were right."

Alphonse then gave a box to Winry, who was surprised. She opened it delicately. "A pair of house shoes. That's so nice."

Winry immediately put them on. These were welcome on her cold feet. "They're so soft. Thank you, Alphonse."

Then Edward handed her a small box. "Here. I noticed you didn't have your earrings anymore."

Winry opened the small box and saw a pair of pearl earrings. "Ed, you didn't have to. Thank you."

Winry went into the bathroom and started putting them in. She was grateful the holes hadn't grown in yet. She came out of the bathroom and showed them to Edward.

"What do you think?"

"They look nice."

"I don't remember what happened to the other ones you gave me. Last time I remember I was wearing them," Winry replied. She continued "I have nothing to give you guys but thank you for sharing your home with me."

She hugged both of them. Edward told her "Of course. We're happy to have you here, right Al?"

Alphonse agreed. It felt more like home with her here.

They listened to the radio and were alarmed there was a blizzard north of them. People were snowed in and might be stuck inside for days. There was snow in London but not nearly what they had up north.

Several days later, Winry had been studying the ways of this world hard. She still seemed down. The brothers figured she needed to see that this world could be fun too. Not just depressing like the history books made it out to be. And Edward also could see that Alphonse needed a fun day. Medical school had been very demanding, and he could sense Alphonse getting some burn out lately with his temper being a little shorter.

Edward put on his coat and then held out Winry's coat for her to put on. She was still getting used to Edward having some gentleman attributes. The trio headed out the door all smiles on their faces ready to go see a movie and see some sights around London.

They made it downstairs, and Edward did his usual hand behind Winry's back to rush her along but then he stopped when the door of a first floor apartment opened. A short older woman came out.

"Oh Mr. Elric, I haven't seen you in ages. And Alphonse, I feel like it's been even longer."

Alphonse put a hand behind his head being bashful. "Well medical school keeps me really busy, especially since I am doing rotations in the hospital now."

"Oh yes. I'm glad to see that you are doing well. And who is your new lady friend?"

Edward was petrified with his arm still behind Winry's back.

Winry waited a few awkward seconds for Edward to introduce her, but he was acting strange. Winry saw terror in his face. So, she took the initiative.

Winry held out her hand. "I'm Winry. I'm a childhood friend of Ed and Al. We grew up in the countryside together. I'm visiting London. My grandmother died recently, and I needed a change of scenery."

This was the story they had rehearsed together so they could speak to people. And this was the first time that Winry had to use it. She smiled warmly at their neighbor, hoping it would charm her, and there wouldn't be more questions.

"I'm Mrs. Baxter. I'm sorry about your grandmother. Are you staying with the Elrics?" Mrs. Baxter shook her hand.

Before Winry could answer, Edward answered with a firm voice. "We're actually in a hurry. We are heading to the movie theater, and we don't want to be late."

And Edward interlocked Winry's arm in his and started to walk out. Winry shouted behind her. "It was nice to meet you!"

Once they were down the block a way, Winry gave Edward an angry look. "What was that about? We were really rude to her."

Edward was fuming. "That damn woman sticking her nose in everyone's business."

"Who is she?" Winry asked in a heated voice.

Alphonse answered. "She's the landlord's wife. They own the building, and we rent from them."

Edward let go of Winry's arm and started to scratch his flesh arm through his coat. Winry grabbed his arm. "Edward, maybe we should get you a new coat if it's bothering your skin this badly."

Edward grinded his teeth. He was in such a foul mood. Alphonse didn't want Winry's experience to be soured. It was supposed to be a fun day for her.

"So Ed, can we get popcorn at the movie theater?"

"They have popcorn?!" Winry asked with enthusiasm. "It's been so long since I've had some."

Edward saw her joy, and it warmed his heart a little bit. This was supposed to be a good experience for her. Something to let her know that there were still good times to be had.

"Of course. And they have candy too. You can pick whatever kind you like," Edward informed her.

Alphonse frowned. "You always make me choose popcorn or candy. You never let me have both."

"Well today, you can get both," Edward told them in a way that made him sound like an exasperated parent. Alphonse and Winry's faces brightened with sheer happiness like two little kids getting a new toy.

They made it to the movies and enjoyed the show while eating popcorn and candy. Winry sat between them. She shared the popcorn with Edward and Alphonse. She seemed to be having a good time, which made the brothers glad.

Edward and Winry both reached for the popcorn at the same time, and their hands met. Their faces turned pink but they couldn't see that in the theater. Winry apologized but Edward told her to go ahead and take her share of popcorn first. Edward started feeling a familiar warmth in his chest and a glow on his cheeks. Was this the start of something? But how could he start something with Winry? They were friends. Friends that were sleeping together. Edward shook his head clear of any naughty thoughts that were trying to creep in.

After the movie, they got on the bus and went around town seeing all the different sights. Winry was really impressed with the big clock. She wondered aloud about how large the gears were inside of it, and how she wished she could see them. Edward laughed that she was still a gearhead at heart.

Before heading home for the evening, they stopped at a café and got hot chocolate. They sat at a little table sipping hot drinks to warm themselves up. It had been a busy day but Winry seemed happier. She didn't seem as downcast. The Elrics figured she would need more days like this to help her overcome whatever she went through.

Alphonse figured her depression probably followed her here since depression doesn't disappear that easily. Despite Winry having amnesia, her depression still had a grip on her. But Alphonse knew she could overcome it, though she may need some help from them. Winry would still be the one who would have to get herself over it but having a support system was vital. Alphonse would have to communicate that with Edward but today was not the day to talk about that kind of stuff. He planned on sitting Winry down at some point to talk about it sooner rather than later.

Eventually winter break came to an end. Edward was going back to work and gave Winry money to handle the groceries and anything else she might need. She seemed to be picking up the ways of this world quickly.

One day though, there was a massive flood due to the Christmas blizzard melting up north and increasing the water flow in the river. The first floor of the hospital had water in it. They cancelled Ed's afternoon classes and the next day's classes hoping the water would reside soon.

Edward was worried about Winry and ran home after his last class for the day. He found the apartment empty. His pulse increased as panic set in. He ran outside to look for her. Just outside the apartment building, there she was with a paper bag of groceries.

"Hey Ed, you're home early. I just got some ingredients to make stew tonight," she smiled casually.

Edward ran to her and embraced her so hard that she dropped the groceries. Winry was startled. "Ed, what's wrong?"

"There's a flood by the river due to the snow melting. I thought you might have been caught in it or stranded somewhere. I don't know. I'm so stupid. I'm just rambling now."

Winry's cheeks reddened. "You were that worried about me?"

She returned his embrace firmly gripping his back. "I'm fine. See? I can handle myself. But these groceries might not be."

Edward looked down and saw the scattered ingredients. "Sorry. Here. I'll help you with them."

"Well, you better. This is our dinner tonight," Winry teased him.

They gathered the groceries and laughed at their reactions to their current situation. They didn't notice someone's eyes watching them through the curtains on the first floor.

With the new semester beginning, Alphonse had to work the night shift for a few weeks. It was considered an important challenge for the medical students to see how they handle being off hours. He was mainly working in the emergency department.

Because Alphonse was working an odd shift, he finally got some alone time with Winry though. He was happy to have it. Ed and Winry had been attached at the hip to each other during winter break. He understood that Edward wanted to teach her about the world and make sure she was safe. But sometimes the best way to learn was to be on your own a little bit.

Alphonse and Winry were eating breakfast. Edward had just left, and Alphonse had just returned home from his nightshift. He and Winry made casual conversation before Alphonse decided to dive deeper.

"Winry, I really am glad you're here. Are you doing okay though? I know memory loss can be traumatic."

Winry tilted her head with a smile. "You're so kind. It's been so weird. I just wish I knew what happened."

"Well, when I came to this world, somehow my memories returned."

Winry stood up. "Really?! Did you do anything to make it happen?"

"No, just going through that gate made me remember. I don't know why. I don't know how we'll get yours back. But I was wondering how you are feeling?"

"I'm fine."

"Winry, are you feeling any depression?"

"I ummmm. I don't know. I feel sad, and I don't know why. It's so frustrating because I don't know why I feel so down. I don't even remember why I'm depressed."

Alphonse had a worried expression. "I'm sorry. Maybe you were depressed, and it just came with you when you came over. I have a feeling that it can change your brain chemistry. But mental health care in the world is tragic. But there are plenty of ways for you to help yourself. Maybe try journaling or going for walks. Exercise is really good for your body and mind. Maybe we can set you some goals."

"Alphonse, thank you. I think those are good ideas. Maybe those will help with my memories."

"I'm not sure but it's worth a try. Anyways, I'm glad that you're here. It really cheered Brother up. He's been down lately."

Winry's head popped up. "Why has Ed been down?"

Alphonse rubbed the back of his head and made an awkward expression. "Well, you see, he got dumped by his girlfriend."

"Oh," Winry said. She was surprised but not sure why. It makes sense that Edward would have a girlfriend at some point. There was no point in her feeling a ping of jealousy just then. And why was she feeling jealous? They were just friends. Never had they been anything more. And yet there it was. A hint of green in her heart.

"Ed met Noah before he came back to Amestris. He saved her from some bad men. You know how Ed is. He loves being the knight in shining armor. They lived together and welcomed me into their home when I arrived here. The problem was Noah is Roma, and Roma have a bad reputation for swindling people. But Noah was sweet. She wasn't trying to take advantage of Brother. But we lived in Germany, and Roma weren't very welcome there. So, Ed did a few study abroad programs in Italy and France so we could get away from Germany. And finally he was able to transfer to a university here in London. And after he graduated, he was offered a job! It was too good to turn down. And I get a discount on my medical school because he's employed there."

Winry sipped on her coffee as Alphonse continued.

"Well, the problem was Noah hated it here. She didn't like London at all. She said there wasn't enough sunshine here. She wanted to go south to Spain or back to Italy. But Ed didn't want to leave. His job was perfect, and it was helping me get my degree. In these days, a good job is hard to walk away from."

Winry nodded "That's understandable."

Alphonse agreed and continued. "They argued about that. But another issue came up. And this is why I've been worried about you living with us."

Winry leaned forward even more intrigued.

"Do you remember the landlord's wife, Mrs. Baxter? Well, she found out Noah was living with us and said some terrible things to her. She called her a prostitute, or a whore. It was awful. Ed was furious. But we are locked in this lease until July."

Winry lowered her head and stared into her coffee. "That's so unfortunate."

"There were some other issues but you will have to ask Brother about those. I want to warn you that he is really sensitive about this. But maybe he will respond better to you. I'm worried about him. He hasn't been himself since the breakup. He hasn't been out with his friends since then, and it's been almost three months! Anyways, I've been up all night. I have to get some sleep."

"Oh right! Sorry Al. I'll take care of the dishes," Winry said and started gathering the plates.

"But Al, can I ask you one more thing? Was this Ed's first girlfriend?"

Alphonse nodded. "Yeah, she was."

Winry started on the dishes while Alphonse went to his room to sleep. She thought 'Poor Ed. He's going through his first break up, and it sounds like it was tragic. And that damn Mrs. Baxter made everything worse. I'm really going to have to be careful around her.'

Then Winry realized something. 'This is why Ed was always pushing me to go quickly through the first floor. He was trying to avoid Mrs. Baxter since she said those cruel things to Noah.'

Winry knew she needed to talk with Edward about this. But she would have to find the right time. And not only that, she needed to work on herself too. She would go buy a journal today and maybe just go for a walk to get some exercise.

Over the next few weeks, Winry couldn't find the right time to bring up Edward's ex. She was in a nice routine with Edward and Alphonse. She started to cheer up some more as she was slowly working on herself. But she avoided bringing up Noah, and she would soon regret that decision.

Edward came home from work and walked through the first floor to the steps. He cringed when he realized he had to pay his rent. He knocked on the Baxters' door, and of course, Mrs. Baxter opened it. 'Why didn't her husband answer the door?' Edward thought.

Mrs. Baxter took his rent money. Edward turned to go but she stopped him by grabbing his arm. "I need to speak with you about a delicate subject, Mr. Elric, and I think you already know."

Edward paused and he scowled at her.

"Mr. Elric, it's about that pretty blonde girl. It seems she has been residing with you. And once again, I have to warn you about bringing a whore here to live with you."

Edward growled at her "She is not that at all! Don't you dare call her that! She's just a friend that needs some help," he pulled his arm away from her grip and started to walk away up the stairs.

Mrs. Baxter shouted "Well at least this one is prettier than that gypsy woman that was here previously!"

Edward turned around and clenched his fists. He was irate but knew there wasn't much he could do.

"I will call the police again if she keeps doing her business here," Mrs. Baxter and closed her door.

Edward's face paled. It was just like with Noah. The police came and they had to defend her. It was embarrassing for all of them. And with Noah being Roma didn't help. The police couldn't find evidence of prostitution so they left. But the damage had been done.

Edward went inside his apartment. "Winry, you here?"

He was alone. Alphonse had gone to meet up with his classmates. Winry must be out shopping for dinner or just going for a walk like she had been doing lately. Only the cat was here.

Edward felt his heartrate skyrocket and his chest hurt. He sat down and was left alone with his thoughts. "Winry's going to leave me just like Noah did. That woman is going to antagonize her until she can't take it anymore."

Edward leaned back and his chest tightened even more. It hurt so much. He started feeling the sweat drip from his face. There was only one thing that made him overcome the panic attacks. He hated it and he had no idea what made him start doing it.

Edward stumbled into the bathroom and closed the door. He wanted this pain in his chest to disappear. He took off his shirt and glanced at his flesh arm. His skin was red and dry from scratching. He's not sure what started that habit either but whenever he felt anxious, he would start scratching. There were a few lines of scars from the previous cuts he had inflicted on himself. They had healed nicely but were still present.

Edward took the razor he used to shave with and placed it on his arm. He was hesitant to do this again but it seemed the only way to be released from his anxiety that was making him miserable. He put more pressure until he could feel the pain and see the blood drizzle down his elbow. But he lost his balance slightly and the razor went deeper than he intended. "FUCK!"

He felt his body swoon and he sat down on the floor. He took his shirt and put pressure on the wound. It was bleeding more profusely than his previous cuts. It was deeper.

'Shit, am I going to pass out?' He felt a wave of nausea hit him. His face feeling pale, and his blood pressure dropping. His palm was sweaty.

"GOD DAMN IT!" he cried out.

Then Edward heard a knock on the bathroom door.

Author's notes: We finally get to Ed's trauma. Some of this is based on my own issues. When my anxiety is high, I tend to scratch my arms or my stomach. I have no idea why this is my body's way of coping. The skin is the largest organ and can suffer from high stress also. It was not an easy habit to break. My skin would actually burn as I resisted the urge to scratch. But I feel better after breaking that habit. Don't worry I went to therapy and learned healthy ways to cope with anxiety.

I packed so much material in this chapter because I wanted to reveal Ed's trauma. But I also wanted Winry to get some healing done too. And to include some cute moments between them. Anyways, thanks for reading.

PS. The Christmas blizzard and the flood in London are events that actually happened.