Hello lovely people everywhere!

I know it took me quite a while (which clearly is understating it), but with starting a new job and this little thing called pandemic going on, life became increasingly crazy. Thank you so much for your patience and for sticking with me :-) However, here we go again.

Warning: Explicit sexual content! It starts slowly, so as soon as anyone feels uncomfortable, stop reading the chapter.

17 Think of England

24/04 – 03/05/2000

After the first awkward morning of realizing that they had indeed spent the night kissing and cuddling, Hermione and Severus had gotten used to the idea of finally being able to live their affection between each other. No more hiding from one another or searching for subterfuges to lean-in to the other. It felt relieving and relaxing for both.

They had agreed on spending the remaining time until the spring feast at the Burrow in Spinner's End, where Hermione wanted to learn for the approaching NEWTS and Severus simply wanted to enjoy the fact that his house felt like home.

While she was curled up on the sofa, leaning with her back against his arm reading, Severus snatched the book from her without warning.

"Ahem. Excuse you!"

"Ahem-. No! I'm calling it a day for you. You know every step of every potion recipe by heart. You even know my special modifications to bring the potions to perfection in the practical part," he said.

Hermione snorted very inelegantly.

"Do rude noises as much as you want, but I stand by it. This way there is a slight chance that you won't make Draco cry in despair during your revisions before classes start again.

"Maybe we won't manage to revise before-, then he'll likely cry in your class, when he sees me in action," she weighed-in.

"I'm really not sure if you aren't seriously tempted to do this to me, but I daresay you'd never do that to him," Severus chuckled, "and your inner swots will force you to revise-, on Sunday evening the latest," he added.

"Hmm. Unless he needs to recover from his exhaustingly sportive holidays-,"

"He's doing spor-? Merlin, woman!" he exclaimed and Hermione burst into laughter.

"It's good to see that your brain is on holiday leave, too. Unbelievable that it took you longer than two seconds to get it," she teased under her breath.

"I blame you, not the holidays,"

"I cannot be blamed for your lacking brainwork. I'm an inspiration at the very least."

"Not the best apparently, when the result still works as teasing basis."

"Well, this may also be attributed to your age, don't you think?"

"I better kiss you before this ends up in hurt feelings and squabbling, because I 'm a bit touchy when it comes to our age difference," he said in what could be interpreted as an even tone, but Hermione heard he was earnest about it and so glad that he managed not to bolt or snap.

She turned a bit to lock eyes with him and cupped his cheek with her left hand.

"Hmm, better let me kiss you. So all you'll remember is that I eagerly searched the touch of your soft lips against mine, which will ensure you of my admiration for you as exactly the man you are," she said lowly-voiced and kissed him tenderly and then whispered against his lips, "I wouldn't want you any different Severus Snape."

This made him grab her hair and deepening their kiss passionately into which she fully indulged.

.o.O.o.

Severus felt her tense against him. Since he repetitively felt like murdering the ones responsible for her recurring tension, he was glad that there was none of them left alive otherwise he would very likely abandon her now and hunt them down.

"I'm sorry," she whispered, when he stopped his caress.

"Don't you dare!" he chided gently and started to move his thumb on her ribs again.

"I keep spoil-sporting."

"I'll continue struggling through the discomfort of kissing and cuddling you anyway," he blinked at her.

He leaned-in to kiss her again. Tenderly.

"And I might just talk to you a bit. Since I know that there are very many thoughts on many things in this smart brain of yours-," he kissed her forehead, "and that it will keep thinking despite my affections. Likely about some vague super-ordinate lovers-protocol that needs to be followed and about how you are interrupting it and about how long it'll take me to be annoyed enough to complain or roll my eyes at least. And this is no wonder since you've known me as short-tempered for many years now-, but for a couple of months also as patient and even caring in private situations and that this certainly is one and so you can just let go of this line of thought. Maybe every once in a while I get carried away and stop talking to just lean-in to you and kiss you. Just like this-"

He kissed her again. Even more tenderly.

"And then I'm going to tell you how wonderful it feels to have you kiss me so eagerly and to be allowed to kiss you at all. To be the one that makes you do these little noises in such a husky voice. And after a while I'm going to explore a bit more of you, because you've started moving again so invitingly while kissing and because I love to feel you-. And slowly comes the moment in which we are completely relaxed again, which gets us carried away and so I'll start to explore a new very intimate place, which you would love to have me touch gently and kiss-," Severus' kissed her and delicately sucked at her bottom lip, while his fingertips continued exploring her ribs, slowly coming up to her left breast, when she tensed again, "But suddenly your brain will interrupt again, because I also reach another scar, which makes you all uncomfortable again. And you'll tense up again. And when I look at you and into your lovely brown eyes, I can see the struggle and fear- like now. And maybe just because your busy brain found itself another line of thought to pursue, namely if someday I might wonder if you were in reality refusing me. And even if I knew this wasn't the case, your brain might still worry for how long I'd be willing to wait. And then the struggle extends itself. Maybe even to chiding yourself to finally get over it as it's all been such a long time ago-." Severus looked at her. "And suddenly you'll feel that my hand has simply stayed where it was, and you'll know it did, because I know that you don't want me to stop, but are just uncomfortable to have me move further ahead. So I count our blessings by staying were we've come so far and remind you a bit more of how delicate this is," he whispered into her ear.

He stroked her lightly and nibbled at her earlobes.

Silent tears were falling he recognised.

"And you may not be able to withhold tears over that. And I'll smooth them away- just like so- and then kiss your beautiful lips again-," his lips brushed softly over hers. "And tell you not to dare being sorry. And that I enjoy every second of every kiss and caress we share." He kissed her again, his hand slowly caressing her belly in circles.

"But your brain surely doesn't give up. We both know it's actually a show-off, so it must simply prove that it knows more arguments."

Hermione snorted slightly and he grinned.

"And it may let pop-up something along the lines of maybe you should just pull yourself together and get it over with and that after the first time it will be alright for sure."

They locked eyes and Hermione swallowed hard before averting her gaze.

"But that's not the way I want it to be for you and us. I don't want you to lie back and think of England-,"

She couldn't help but grin, although strained. "No." Just a statement.

She turned to face him again enjoying his feather-light strokes.

"No-. I don't want you even a little uncomfortable, but all relaxed and eager and with this beautiful desire in your eyes that makes your cheeks blush. So we'll take our time. A lot of time. Years if necessary. Which we pass with more of this kissing and stroking thing-," he sucked-in her bottom lip again, "And then there will be this one occasion, and we'll both be positively surprised, when you just won't be able to withstand any longer, but long to be touched at all the sensitive spots so dearly that you'll just give in. And I - here and now - promise to take care of them all very thoroughly by caressing, kissing and- softly sucking them- and we'll both enjoy our reactions to every touch."

"Severus-, please-," she breathed, voice all husky.

"Oh yes, that's the longing. But begging won't be necessary. You get it all anyway-," he said in his smooth voice very close to her ear and made her shiver.

His mouth moved to kiss her lips and then wandered down to her throat, kissing and nibbling, while his hand slowly moved up to her right breast, brushing over her hard nipple through the fabric of her shirt. Severus moaned at this feeling and Hermione instinctively moved towards him, wanting more.

When his mouth had reached her collarbone, he slowly tugged down her low-cut shirt until his mouth could reach this sensitive hard spot.

Hermione looked down, wanted to see him, the man she wanted so much.

Suddenly, he felt her tense again and thus started to very slowly brush with his lips over her chest, from her right breast over the cleavage to the left one.

"Then your brain decides to show-off again," he whispered against her skin. "It clearly has no mercy for our passion and should call itself lucky that we both have a soft spot for brainwork-."

Severus looked up very slightly and twinkled at her.

"It surely votes for rethinking the glamour-casting issue. And I seriously hope you're able to properly remember of how much I indulge into witnessing the real you, with all the proof of your bravery, sacrifice and strength, because I'm currently unable to remind you properly, since, honestly, I'm very distracted and I'd love to just go on with what we've started, because you were so flatteringly responsive-. You are so unbelievably good for my ego. You know that, right?"

She giggled and smiled at him.

"But I'd rather go for kissing your lips and sucking them a little. And after a while, I'll just look at you so you can see me, all flushed and unable to concentrate on talking. And then all that will be left is for you to have enough mercy to kiss me and spare me the disgrace of spoiling the mood with more unsexy babbling, because this is pretty much all that can be expected from me at this point since my brain will be increasingly and seriously running out of blood."

She looked up at him and assessed his face, all open, honest and filled with admiration and desire. Hermione carefully sat up and moved vis-a-vis in his lap. She kissed him and he returned the kiss tenderly. After having explored and deliciously sucked each other's tongues and lips a bit, Severus slowly tugged the straps of her shirt down her shoulders to caress every part of her naked skin with kisses and indulge into her naked form that was so perfect in its imperfection and only his to see and touch.

"Severus- please-."

"What do you want?" he purred.

"You." She bit her lip and he saw her blush.

"You have me," he whispered into her ear from behind her while stretching her further with three fingers now.

The young woman moaned and arched her back, pushing against his fingers. "In me," she swallowed and blushed even more. It hadn't occurred to her so far that after the brutal experience with too many nuances of the act itself, she would ever even be able to feel a physical and emotional need to physically bond with a man. The urge for him was so strong, she felt as if she couldn't go on living without having him now. Besides being unexpected, the intensity was slightly disturbing.

Very slowly he let his well-lubricated fingers slip out of her and while moving them towards her clit they brushed over her natural and welcoming wetness and all the sensitive flesh, which made her moan hoarsely again. He gently turned her onto her back and then he saw it in her eyes - the need. This nearly made him dizzy with lust and happiness so he just leaned down, cupped up her cheek and kissed her longingly while positioning himself at her entrance.

"Please stay close," she whispered against his lips. Despite all the desire she felt, the thought of having sex without being held frightened her. She needed love-making before anything else.

"Of course, as close as I'm now," he assured in his velvety voice, while his hair fell down on her face, "and I want to see you when we unite."

They locked eyes and Severus gently, but firmly pushed against her entrance. There was no muscular resistance and he instantly knew that this was not only due to his stretching but because she really wanted this. Not letting himself go at this insight took some effort, even at the sight of tears building in her eyes, "You sure?" The husky voice.

"Gods, yes, please-," she moaned, a tear of despaired longing falling from her eye into her hair and he couldn't stop himself anymore and thrust further into her until he was completely inside. Hermione stopped breathing at the sensation of him filling and stretching her to the fullest and Severus resisted the desire to move inside her tight hotness to let her adapt to his size. His lips came down to hers again and she immediately kissed him passionately. His left hand massaged her clit making her moan into his mouth and slightly biting his tongue she pushed herself against him, needing to feel him even more. Severus started to carefully thrust into her. After some time, one hand came to rest at her head massaging her scalp while he changed his angle and then her look of surprise and the gasp told him he had just managed to find the right angle to provide a friction that would satisfy her too.

"Oh God-," she moaned at the new sensation and with only five more thrusts she came with an outcry and her whole body tensed under his and moved against him in the exact waves in which her orgasm flowed through her. When her muscles clenched around his throbbing member he couldn't resist any longer, and after three more deep thrusts he came with unexpected intensity too. In the immediate aftermath he shortly lost track of his body and rested his forehead on hers to anchor himself.

As the orgasm ebbed away she already felt the loss since he would withdraw from her very soon now. Another wave of sadness overwhelmed her. The mere idea of him no longer inside her was too much. She had never known that before. Hermione swallowed and Severus took it as a sign to shift himself slightly, believing that she must have gone numb under his weight already.

"Not yet please," she pleaded instantly.

"I like you breathing and three-dimensional," he returned before very gently pulling out of her. Spooning her up from behind, Severus snuggled her very close and kissed the nape of her neck.

Although this eased the young woman a bit, she needed to sort out her thoughts. Never had she felt this longing for a man.

"I know I repeat myself, but you really are terribly good for my ego," he said smoothly and she could feel his breath in her hair.

"Hmm? I was distracted, sorry."

"There is a little crack now, but you are still good for my ego."

Hermione grinned. "I've never experienced such, ahem, need before. I mean, it made me cry," she conceded.

He propped himself onto his elbow and whispered into her ear, "That's what I meant. I was nearly done by witnessing it in your eyes,"

She turned her head up, cupped his cheek and then they kissed longingly again. "I didn't know something like this existed and how to handle it. It's the first time I ever-," she stopped herself.

"You ever what?" he asked against her lips.

"-really wanted and needed someone-, you," she whispered and blushed.

"Merlin woman, my ego feels adequately stroked again,"

"I think we should clarify our respective definitions of ego," she teased and pressed her arse to his groin, feeling his cock hardening against her.

"My ego renders my brain useless right now. I surrender to yours," he whispered and made her giggle.

"Wise decision."

He cupped up her right breast and played with her nipple turning her giggle into moaning against his mouth. Now turning her on her back, Severus sucked in her nipple to draw another moan from her. He then looked up at her, "Hermione? Would the redhead clan be waiting for you before noon?"

"No. Why?" she asked in confusion, really not wanting to think about any of them now.

When he deliciously sucked in her nipple once again, she drew another sharp breath. "Because I have the feeling that this is going to be a very long night and none of us will certainly make it out of bed for breakfast. I wouldn't even bet for lunch."

Something in his voice and his playful nonchalance put her over the edge now. The need to feel him inside again was building so forcefully that tears were starting to dwell in her eyes again and they threatened to fall when his fingers reached her clit and brushed over it before they dipped into her warm moisture. This instantly aroused him again.

"Look at me," he commanded gently and when they locked eyes, he added, "I want you." Hermione obligingly spread her legs further and Severus instantly shoved two well-lubed fingers into her to stretch her tight hole for his member. His thumb caressed her clit and she moved invitingly next to him. Deliciously sucking her earlobe, he positioned himself closer behind her and carefully entered again. There was nearly no resistance from the muscle rim. When she had lain down on her side completely and turned her face back to kiss him, he stopped shoving inside her tightness and simply took her in: she looked deliciously, all flushed, her hair messier than ever and her eyes conveyed so much emotion that it was hard to not lose control. He remembered her history and didn't dare jeopardising her trust in him by letting himself go now.

"I want you completely," she said hoarsely against his lips, making him smile.

"Your wish is my command." They kissed lingeringly again and Hermione slowly pushed herself back against him. When Severus pushed too she gasped at the feeling of his rock-hard member suddenly stretching and filling her fully. Severus put his hand on her hip to still her movement and after having smoothed some of her sweaty curls behind her ear, he whispered into it, "Take your time to adapt. I want you to feel me properly inside you, to feel how perfectly we fit, how full you are- with me. You're so tight, so hot, so perfect." His fingers now rubbed over her swollen clit and she moaned involuntarily. Hermione could already feel the orgasm approaching, just from feeling him in and at her. He then let his hand wander back to where his member stretched her anus and rubbed the sensitive flesh around it with her moist. This incentive broke the rigour and she grabbed his hair pulling his head down on hers while starting to pull her hips away from him so he could thrust into her.

"Severus, I'm so close-,"

"Come as fast and often as you can," he interrupted and let his nails deliciously scratch over her sensitive spots and the friction of all of them at once immediately made her come hard and with a scream of relief she let go of the firework inside her. For a couple of seconds he once again looked at the sensation of this passionate beautiful woman and while his hand in this position held her to him, he thrust into her with fast and deep strokes and as his own orgasm built up deliciously, Hermione also focused back on the game. She realised with some awe that Severus seemed to push against her cervix from behind and that this slightly painful pressure would make her come again very soon and while she still thought about the strangeness, she felt his nails slightly dug into her hips, while he thrust into her completely, which led to a sweet pain that instantly let another orgasm wash over her, too. It was a different one, deeper and sustained and one that was moaned through instead of screamed out and so it melted perfectly into Severus' groan, which deepened when he felt her muscles again clenching around his throbbing member.

Being dizzy with satisfaction he simply dropped his head onto the mattress still spooning her from behind. After having Accioed the blanket over them both, Severus firmly encircled Hermione's chest to ensure her of his presence. When she immediately put her hand on his arm and stroked it softly with her thumb, Severus recognized how reassured he felt by her and that this indeed was real.