But You Love Me
The weekend passes fairly quickly and soon enough everyone was back at school on Monday and like everyday, there's some type of shit going on.
I'm in fourth period English class with Kenny, fat ass, Clyde and douche. And I'm sitting next to Clyde who's on my right and Kenny who's on my left and Cartman sitting in the desk behind me. The teacher—Mrs. Green (she's British and has an accent similar to Pip's) is talking and it's silent; most of us are writing note when a loud, obnoxious farting sound breaks the silence and concentration of others.
"Goddammit Cartman!" Kyle yells.
"What? Jew just turn around and do your fucking work."
"You keep farting and I can't even concentrate for two fucking minut—" Kyle was cut off by Cartman farting again.
"Oh, did you say something Kyle I couldn't hear you."
"Alright, Eric go to the principal's office."
"Finally," Kyle practically screams in relief.
"Mr. Donovan wake up!"
Sitting next to Clyde I shake him and he jumps up with a shout of, "Mommy, I did put the toilet seat down!"
"Clyde, do I need to send you to the Principal's office too?"
"N-no Mrs. Green," Clyde says and sits up to try to pay some sort of attention.
"Craig Tucker are you also sleeping in my class?"
Craig's head shoots up from his desk quickly as he says "No," before laying his head back down.
"Mr. Tucker! You are sleeping in my class!" Mrs. Green shouts impatiently. Not that she's going to get much of a reaction out of Craig.
"No I'm not," Craig says with his eyes still closed and head still laid on the table. The entire class starts laughing at a confused and frustrated Mrs. Green who turns around and starts to teach again.
"Mrs. Green?" I ask tentatively, not really wanting to bring too much attention on myself, but Wendy just texted me approximately three minutes ago to meet her near her locker.
"Yes Stanley?"
"For crying out loud!"
"Kyle don't get upset so quickly. This could be important. Now what is it that you want Stan?"
"No, it's okay never mind—" I start to say as the attention of the entire class is diverted to me. We only have about ten minutes left of class anyway.
"No, go ahead Stan," Mrs. Green encourages.
"Uh, can I go to the bathroom?"
"Really?!" Kyle throws his hands in the air in irritation.
"Dude chill, this has nothing to do with you." I can't help, but say completely annoyed.
"It does when it's involving my education." Kyle quips back and I grit my teeth. Fuck your education.
"Well just shut up and finish taking notes like everybody else."
"Don't tell me what to do jackass."
"Kyle, language." Mrs. Green says at last.
"Can I just go?" I ask firmly.
"Yes Stanley, you may." Mrs. Green allows with a wave of her slender pale hand.
As I walk past Kyle's desk he mutters just enough for me to hear, "Asshole." Hearing this, as I walk past I 'mistakenly' knock Kyle's notes on the floor. Twerp. "Oh," I start in a bluntly obvious fake concerned tone, "Looks like you dropped your notes Broflovski, how clumsy of you."
"Yes Kyle, you shouldn't leave your notes on the ground someone could trip," Ms. Green pitches in politely as she continues to scribble something on the whiteboard.
"But I think he did it intentionally Mrs. Green," I decide to say lips quirking up in a half grin/grimace as the class snickers.
"Is that true Kyle? Did you drop your notes so Stanley would fall?"
Kyle had to be boiling with rage. Good. "No, Mrs. Green I did not," Kyle says through gritted teeth.
And as I leave the classroom I paste a smug smirk on my face and for sure Kyle wants to knock it off my face so bad.
"I'm sorry Principal Victoria," I say in my usual un-sorry and bored tone.
"I told you I'm not Principal Victoria! I'm the Vice Principal!" The raging balding guy with a receding hairline shouts at me who was now seated in the dark blue cushioned chair with mahogany arms and legs that matched the decor of the office.
Oh great, this asshole; Vice Principal Brown. He's round, his breath smells like stale coffee and he's always wearing a suit that resembles the color of shit. Principal Victoria is one of the South Park
Elementary faculty members that followed us to high school along with some of the teachers from North, West, and East park.
"And where is Principal Victoria Mr. Round?" I ask not really caring.
"Brown, and she's not here today, she took a day off."
"Alrighty, well I guess I'll go back to class then," I comment standing up.
"No, you will not. You were sent here to be dealt with and you should be punished."
"Punished my ass, I'm leaving." I snort.
"That's it young man! I am tired of your attitude and language!"
"Well, I'm tired of standing here looking at your round ass in a brown shit stain suit." I point out.
"That is it Eric," Both Vice Principal Brown and I turn in the general direction where we heard the voice. Standing in the arch of the doorway is Principal Victoria dressed in a blue pinstripe pants suit today. "For the rest of the month you will have after school detention."
"But it wasn't my fault I have gas reflux," I whine, knowing that more often than not it still gets me off the hook even as a seventeen year old.
"Sorry Eric, but you will serve after school detention, starting today." Principal Victoria decides unfazed.
"Goddammit!" I yell angrily before leaving and slamming the door on my way out. I ignore the registrar's stare before barreling out of the front office and into the empty hallway. I have shit to do today! As I'm walking down the hallway I see Stan walking the opposite hallway. How he convinced that stuck bitch to get out of class must have been amazing.
"Hey asshole, what are you doing out here," I greet as I make my way across the hall towards Stan.
"I'm going to the bathroom."
"Yeah right, I'm not stupid." Must Stan insult my intelligence like this.
"I'm going to go see Wendy," Stan admits.
"Weak," I say un-caring.
"Shut up fat ass, she wants to tell me something."
"Oh no. I guess today is the day. It's a little earlier than I expected the bitch would dump you, but it wouldn't make—"
"What? Wendy's not breaking up with me?!" Stan is so easy.
"Look Stan, you know this bitch does this all the time. She says she wants to talk and the next thing we know you're making out with Patty Nelson or some other hoe, and crying about how the fuck you feel."
"Look I have to go, I told Ms. Green I was going to the bathroom." Stan says walking away from me. I know I've gotten to him, why do I do it? Because it's too easy. And honestly I don't know how Park High's golden couple even manage to last as long as they do. They breakup about twice a year and still run back to each other, it's fucking pathetic.
"Good luck asshole, don't cry like a pussy," I say before leaving in the opposite direction, towards the front doors of the school. Fuck if I'm gonna let detention ruin what have planned today.
Walking down the hallway I couldn't help, but wonder if Cartman was right. Maybe Wendy wants to break up. Shit, what am I going to say? If she breaks up with me I'm going to feel like shit. I cover face with my palms, but drop them once I spot Wendy standing patiently by her locker. When she sees me she gives me a weary smile.
"Oh crap, she's about to break up with me."
"What, Stan I'm not breaking up with you. I just wanted to ask you something. Can you tell the president of the debate club 'aka Kyle' that we're going to have to reschedule our meeting. I'm not going to be here after school."
"Why?" I ask curiously. She didn't mention anything important yesterday.
"I'm leaving early. I'm going to an interview for an intern job."
Ah, I vaguely remember Wendy telling me that Gerald Broflovski's lawyer firm has an intern position open.
"Okay, but why can't you tell the president of the debate club yourself?" I ask not really wanting to talk to Kyle or be around him at all.
"Because I have to leave now Stan, my interview is in an hour." Wendy explains calmly as if this makes complete sense.
"To prepare?"
"No, to pick out a cute, but sophisticated outfit," Wendy says with a bright smile, " I'm taking Bebe with me so she can help."
"I still don't understand why you can't go tell him now," I say pouting just a bit and hoping it gets me out of doing this one thing.
Instead Wendy stares at me hoping I'd relent, but when I refuse and my expression still shows indifference she sighs heavily.
"You know, it's okay Stan. I'll go by and tell Kyle. You don't have to do it. I just thought you would because you are my boyfriend who I love very much by the way. And I thought you'd be able to do me this tiniest favor. I thought you would understand how important this interview is to me," Wendy then opens her locker and sighs heavily once again, taking out two giant books.
Watch Wendy stuff her already overstuffed backpack with one book and the other inside of a giant handbag I admittedly begin to feel guilty. I mean it is a small thing to do, won't take more than a minute and I should be man enough to do it.
"I'm sorry Wens, your right I am your boyfriend and I love you too. I should be able to do this for you. I'll do it, no problem."
"Thanks Stan," Wendy calls as I leave and God I love her.
I finally finish taking notes just as the bell rings. As I'm getting my books together I feel a tap on my shoulder. I turn around and see Craig.
"You nearly lost it in class a few minutes ago."
"How would you know, you were asleep."
"No, you should know by now that I was not really asleep." That's true and explains why Craig always passes tests or any type of quiz we take. He just doesn't care too much for participation, but funny enough Mrs. Green is the only class Craig sleeps in because and I quote 'She's a whiny British bitch.'
"It was nothing, just Cartman being annoying as always and everyone interrupting my class time. I can barely finish taking the notes I needed to study." I need to pass this test we have coming up next Monday, I need to do something to get my mom off of my back. When I arrived home late last Friday I was ambushed by a wave of lectures and threats of being grounded and having my car keys confiscated.
I wasn't too worried about being grounded because I could just sneak out, but I would like to keep my car and to be able to go on my surprise weekend getaway party.
I haven't told anyone yet, the only person who knows is Wendy because we are planning it together and should pretty much be finished with all of the details and plans after school today. But we pretty much got permission from Principal Victoria to invite the entire senior class on a two day retreat before school closed for the holidays.
"Okay, dude just try to chill out some." Craig advises, "Hey, are you going to Heidi's party Friday?"
"I don't know I have a paper to finish and—"
"No, you're going even if I have to drag you there myself dude. Last time you ditched out on us." Craig states firmly. And by ditching did Craig mean that I actually left to go bang this private school girl's brain out on her living room couch, while her best friend waited for her turn...then yeah.
"Alright I'll go, but I'm not getting wasted." I say, but I know that as soon as I get a cup in my hand that idea is probably going to go straight out of the window. Craig rolls his eyes at my lie and turns around to leave, "See you later asshole." I say lovingly to Craig's retreating back, and I didn't need to see Craig to know that he was flipping me off.
Moments later when I'm at my locker putting my previous books in and getting new ones for my next class, I close my locker and see Kenny leaning on the locker next to mine.
"Hey Ken." I greet lightly.
"Hey Kyle." Kenny looks at me in a knowing way and I shut my locker before we begin walking together. We take our time walking to our next class and occasionally stop to chat with some guys.
Although, as we pass two girls, one of them consisting of Red who shoots a mean glare at me and shrug hardly caring.
Kenny seeing the death glare Red gives me asks, "So, how did it go with Red last Friday? I think you failed to tell me anything that happened between the two of you. And don't leave out any of the dirty parts either." Kenny smirks in anticipation.
"There were no dirty parts. I asked her why she whores herself around, she freaked out and I left," I deadpan.
Kenny stops walking and after walking a few feet ahead I look back at Kenny confused, "What?"
"You practically called her a whore dude. Wow. I knew you were an asshole, but that may have been downright cruel" I say still a bit shocked knowing how blunt Kyle can be most times.
"I was curious and she needed to be asked. Everyone knows she's with a different guy every couple of days."
I was still a little in shock. He knows that when it came to girls Kyle is a major asshole. Its agreeable that Red does tend to be with a different guy frequently, but from actually being one of the assholes that dated and dumped her, I know for a fact that she's not doing it because likes it. She's just lonely and that, even I can understand. She's just a good girl with bad habits.
Despite the rumors that run rampant at this school Kyle has only had two official girlfriends who were Bebe Stevens (Who I am currently fucking) and Rebecca Cotswolds. Those relationships did not go well. Kyle dated Rebecca first, who he did did not have sex with and Bebe second (who he did have sex with ). Every other girl was just one night stands or brief flings that never lasted.
When Kyle and Rebecca broke things off they decided to still be friendly towards each other, but with Bebe… When Kyle broke up with her at the end of 10th grade year she was completely horrific. She cried and screamed. Now Bebe's over Kyle, but ever since what happened to her, Kyle's been known to be the asshole all girls want, but could never truly have.
"True, but don't tell her that. Some guys don't mind a slutty girl," I say knowingly.
"Aren't you still with Bebe?"
"Yeah, but I think I'm going to break up with her today." I joke, because I'm not really sure what me and Bebe have going on could be called an actual relationship. We mostly just fuck and talk, well I do most of the talking, but it's...cool.
"You've only been with her for a couple of weeks."
"She's too clingy for my taste." If Bebe was anything, she wasn't in the least bit clingy. After our first time fucking she didn't stay long to actually want to cuddle. Talk sure, but being all lovey dovey nope. I kind of think that Kyle broke her after he broke up with her. Bebe has not been very emotional available ever since. She's good with sorting out other people's shit, mines included, but she's not very emotional or passionate when it comes to herself.
"You're such an idiot Kenny," Kyle says pushing me lightly, before walking into our advanced chemistry class. Hey, I may not be as smart as Kyle in other subjects, but I tend to have a thing for anything science related. I'm fair in math, but I hope to actually get a degree in automotive engineering.
I haven't really voiced this to anyone except for Butters and Bebe and they've been supportive, but would it be stupid if I was actually worried at what people will think when they realize that I'm not just interested in fucking around and actually care about my future? I hope not.
"But you love me," I reply back smugly as I follow him inside.