Chapter 6: Cats & Dogs Part 3

(Honestly, I didn't mean for this to be a three-parter but I didn't let this story cook enough in my head so to speak. Thankfully, I have a lot more interesting plot points whipped up and hopefully I can write them out in the near future. Until then, enjoy the finale of this little story arc.)

It was Friday night at last and the bleachers on either side of the Springfield High football field were filled to the brim with people hoping to see victory for their home teams. For the locals, this hope was placed on the Springfield Pumas while for the visitors from outta town, it was the Shelbyville Barracudas. The air was filled with tension as both sides of the bleachers yelled at and cursed each other while on the field, the football players focused on readying themselves for the big game.

"Alright, so I'm thinking for our first play, I'll toss the ball over to Jack and then he tosses it to Michael who'll knock one of the Shelbyville guys down and then we can-"

"Oh Nelson!" Jessica sang as she approached the huddle of football players. Her cheerleader outfit was a mix of red and white, the school's colors, which matched the uniform Nelson and his team were wearing.

"Um..can't you see we're in the middle of a huddle here?" Nelson complained.

Jessica just giggled to herself. "Alright. I'll let you boys have your fun but remember to find me after you win the game, ok?" With a sly wink, Jessica went back to her cheer squad while Nelson turned his attention back to his teammates.

"Alright, where was I?" As Nelson struggled to recall what he was planning out before Jessica interrupted him, he noticed his teammates looking at him like he still had today's lunch on his face. "What's wrong?"

"Dude, I think Lovejoy wants to get into your pants." Jack said.

"Jessica? Nah! She probably just wants me to pay for lunch by calling it a date." Nelson replied nonchalantly.

"I don't know man," Michael commented. "I've seen that look in a girl's eyes before and that ain't hunger for no dollar burgers." He put his hand on Nelson's shoulder. "My man gonna see some titties tonight!" The other players laughed and joked about the prospect of Nelson getting it on with Jessica as the annoyed football captain just groaned.

"Knock it off, you horny jackasses!" He shouted. "Focus on the game!" Nelson wasn't usually one to get angry with his teammates but as football captain, he did demand respect and so the jokes and laughter stopped abruptly.

"Alight man." Jack muttered.

"Sheesh." Michael cringed. "Who pissed in your cornflakes?"

Nelson just grunted and looked back at Jessica with her cheer squad. That woman must have had eyes in the back of her head or something because no sooner had he done so, Jessica turned to face him with a friendly smile and wave. He blushed and quickly turned back around, his original plan coming back to him in the nick of time.

Meanwhile, back in the bleachers, Homer Simpson had just made it back to his family with three hot dogs, two plates of nachos, one dill pickle and four Buzz Colas. He also brought back a small bag of chips for Maggie. "Here you go sweetie." Homer cooed as he handed the bag to Maggie.

"Thanks Dad." Maggie took the bag of chips and ripped it open. As she placed the first chip into her mouth, she noticed her older sister looking intently at her phone. She was still dressed in her band uniform from when they played at the beginning of the game. "What's up Lis? Are they burning down the Amazon again?"

"What!?" Lisa panicked and nearly dropped her phone in the process. It spent the next few seconds dancing in and out of her hands as she tried to grab it before she was finally able to get a firm hold on it. With a heavy sigh, she looked back at her younger sister. "I'm sorry. What did you say?"

"I was just asking what's up with the phone." Maggie repeated. "It looks like it you're watching the apocalypse on there or something."

"What? Oh no no no!" Lisa laughed nervously. "I was just looking over some notes for our next big test. I guess I have resting study face or something. It's nothing to worry about."

"If you say so." Maggie turned her gaze back to the game, unconvinced that her sister was telling her the entire truth. That same uneasy feeling she had the other day when Lisa said she would take care of the rods somehow welled within her stomach, telling her that something was going on that she didn't fully understand.

She was right.

Lisa was studying something intensely but it wasn't material for a school test. It was the clock on her phone. In two to three minutes, she would have to leave the game and remove two more monsters out of the equation known as life. She just hoped she could do so inconspicuously enough so as not to attract attention to herself in the process. Everything needed to go perfectly.

"Sup losers!" Lisa's thoughts were cut in by Bart's voice. Dragging herself back to reality, she saw him and Milhouse climb up the bleachers and take a seat next to her. "Earth to Loser Prime," He giggled as he lightly knocked on her head. "Is anyone home?"

"Knock it off Bart." Lisa growled, already a little on edge about her mission. Her displeasure only grew as Milhouse leaned over Bart and displayed his slightly bigger arm. "Check it out Lisa! I've been hitting the gym! Can you tell?" Milhouse sat back up, pulled the sleeve down his arm and flexed with all his might...which bought him about three seconds before he gasped for air.

"The results are amazing." Lisa deadpanned as she looked at her phone. 30 seconds remained. It was now or never. "Well shit," Lisa muttered as she quickly put her phone up. "I gotta go to the restroom."

"But Lisa," Marge spoke. "The game's just about to start!"

"Which is why I need to go now so I don't miss much!" Lisa lied. "Bart! Make room!"

"Fine!" Bart grumbled as he got up to let his sister reach the stairs and walk down to the bottom of the bleachers. "If you run into your drug dealer, bring back some snow!" He called out.

"Ha ha! Very funny!" Lisa remarked as she rushed toward the restrooms, vanishing into the crowd of people near the entrance.

"Bart!" Marge called out. "Don't be making jokes about drug dealers! It's a very serious problem!"

"Relax Mom." Bart replied. "I was just joshing Lisa."

Marge murmured in displeasure and turned her attention to Homer. "And Homer, I don't want you behaving in tonight's game like you've been doing for the past few games."

"Gee! Can't a guy have a little spirit for his sports team?" Homer asked in a offended tone, his mouth still filled with a mess of tortilla chips and half-warm cheese. A single glare from his wife was enough for him to relent. "Alright! Alright! I'll be good!"

"You better." Marge warned wearily while deep down inside herself, she knew that Homer would break his vow before the night was over.

Maggie noticed the discontent on her parent's faces and thought back to what Lisa had told her the other night.

"Mom and Dad have a freaking fight like every week. But they always make up in the end."

"I hope you're right Lis." Maggie thought as she turned her attention back to the field where the game was finally about to start. "I hope you're right."

"Ok, according to the data, the kitten mill should be around here somewhere." Lisa thought as she rode her bike through the country road. After waiting for the bathroom to clear of people, Lisa ran away from the school yard and back home as fast as she could. Thankfully, as almost everyone was at the game, there was no one to see Lisa sneak back into her house with her spare key nor leave it on her bike with a bloated green backpack, her band uniform replaced with a orange sleeveless shirt and black shorts. This also meant she was free to ride said bike to the outskirts of east Springfield, stopping to check her phone every once and a while. About 45 minutes after she left the football field, Lisa spotted a farmhouse on top of a lonely hill. It was old and peeling with a rusted metal hut acting as some sort of makeshift garage or shack on its side. From this sorry excuse of a building, Lisa could her the faint and tired mewing of not only mother cats but their offspring as well.

She had found her target.

Rolling off the road into the field, Lisa stashed the bike behind a large tree and waited, carefully surveying the farmhouse. In the dark, she could make out the movement of at least two other human beings with the garage, no doubt checking over their "merchandise." Yes. That's all these flesh and blood creatures are to these demons, aren't they? Just cold hard cash taking the form of writhing, furry bodies. It didn't matter how sick they were or how malnourished. If they could even see with all the crust in their eyes or walk with their leg's development hampered by the overcrowding. As long as they were still alive at the moment they were bought, they were goods. They were merchandise.

The thought made Lisa's blood boil and she gritted her teeth. "How disgusting! I can't stand it!" Lisa forced herself into a deep breath in order to calm down. She couldn't afford to lose her cool, not now. What she was about to do required a focused mind and zero mistakes. Any less would simply not suffice. She removed her backpack and opened it, removing her mask and a few knives from it before closing it back up. She looked back to the farmhouse and saw the two men leave the garage and enter the building. Now was her chance.

"Tonight's your last night of life, Wolfe." Lisa growled as she slid the mask over her face. "You and your business partner." Sliding the knives into her pockets, Lisa made a beeline straight for the garage.

"Come on! Defense! Defense!" Homer shouted angrily. He was standing on the bleachers and his shirt was off. "Come on defense!"

"Dad! They haven't even thrown the ball yet!" Bart scolded. Sure enough, back on the field, the Springfield Pumas and the Shelbyville Barracuda were face to face on either side of the line of scrimmage, each waiting to take the other down.

"That's why I'm shouting defense!" Homer defended. "So that it doesn't suck this time."

"Just sit back down already! You're embarrassing us!" Bart hissed. Besides him, both Marge and Maggie shielded their faces with their hands.

"Fine!" Homer finally relented. As he sat back down, he shot an angry glance at the score board. So far, Springfield was getting skunked with no points versus Shelbeyville's 7. And while he would never even stop to consider it, the fact was, it was mostly Homer's fault.

"Finally, maybe now that that fatass shut his trap, we can focus on getting a point." Nelson thought as he readied himself for the ball. The referee blew on his whistle and Nelson prepared to pull a Hail Mary pass in order to turn the tide around.

"Come on! Let's see some defense!" Homer shouted as loudly as possible. The sudden shout caught Nelson's attention only for a single second but that was all it took. The Barracuda's sacked Nelson and the referee blew his whistle again

""Oh come on!" Homer shouted as the rest of the crowd booed. "What the hell was that!?"

"Oh god!" Bart groaned as he rubbed his forehead.

"Where's Lisa?" Maggie asked. "She's been gone for almost an hour."

"Knowing her, she probably snuck off to the library for some late night geek facing." Bart muttered through his hand as he wiped it down his face. "I think she made the right call."

"Homer!" Marge screamed. "What did we just tell you?"

"Come on, you acne-riddled losers! Get your head in the game!" Homer shouted, ignoring his wife's scolding completely.

Having had quite enough, Nelson ripped the ball out of the referee's arms and launched it toward the fat man. "Hey Lard ass! Defend against this!" He shouted. The football rammed itself right into Homer's naked gut, knocking the air right out of him as he slumped back into his seat. The ball fell to the floor, leaving behind a large violet bruise which Homer shielded with his hands as he whined to himself. People from both sides of the bleachers cheered at the spectacle and even more so when Bart nonchalantly grabbed the ball and tossed it back to the field.

"Normally, deliberately injuring one of the audience members with the ball would be grounds for an automatic red card." The referee commented. "But if anything, I think that boy deserves a point."

Apparently, the score keeper agreed with that sentiment because the second zero under the Springfield Puma's title became a 1.

"All right!" Nelson cheered as he exchanged high fives with his equally excited teammates. From the sidelines, Jessica and the other cheerleaders laughed as well.

"Are you alright Mr. Simpson?" Milhouse asked the fat man who now sat bowed over himself.

"I'm fine. I think that football might have pushed the nachos back up a little." Homer strained, clearly in a great deal of pain.

"Oh great." Bart muttered. "We're going to have drive Homer to the hospital after the game. Again."

Maggie groaned as she forced herself to watch the game. At this point, her embarrassment in her father's antics was great enough that part of her wish they would just go to the hospital already. Better yet, she wished she'd had gone with her sister to where ever she was. "I don't know where Lis is but it's bound to be better than right here." She thought.

Mike Misgrove was not a very kind man and never really had been. Even when he was a child, he was often given detention for hurting his fellow students. Sometime, he would even hit a teacher or another faculty member. Now as a grisly 40-year old, Mike really only cared about one thing and that was when his next paycheck would come through. For the most part, working in this kitten mill was a pretty sweet gig. Just stick some cat food in all the mother cat's cages every few days and he could spend the rest of all that time sitting on his ass and playing online poker on his phone. However, he had had extra work for the past few days because the freshest fish in the pond, a punk kid named Jeremey, refused to show up or answer his phone. Mr. Wolfe, their boss, had just told him and his coworker, Jimmy Mondo, that he had given up on the kid and would be looking for a replacement soon and that was just fine with them.

"I tell you, it's about fucking time Mr. Wolfe started looking for a replacement." Mike commented as he and Jimmy made their way back to the garage. "Getting sick and tired of pulling the extra weight around here!"

"Weight my hairy ass." Jimmy rolled his eyes. "You just want more time with that stupid online poker of yours."

"Hey! Here's a neat idea! Why don't you shut up before I kick your fucking teeth in, huh?" Mike snapped.

The unimpressed Jimmy rolled his eyes again. He was a calmer man than Mike and like Mike, really only cared about the money. "Let's just do a final headcount for tonight and then head over to the bar. I could use a drink."

"Yeah." Mike sighed as his taunted went unheeded. "Me too."

The two men flipped the light switch on in the garage, causing it to flicker a few times before finally brightening the room. Inside the garage was four long tables, each holding four cages on their surfaces. Within each and every cage was a mother cat and her litter of kittens. The mother cats were skinny and weak, most of the nutrients in their bodies going to the milk their young suckled from their teats. These kittens weren't doing much better however as most of them were sick and dying. Their eyes were crusted over with gunk and some were practically covered in more flea dirt than fur. There were litter boxes inside each of the cages and most of them were full, resulting in a overwhelming stench.

"Remind me tomorrow that we gotta clean out the damn litter boxes." Jimmy mumbled as he held his arm over his mouth.

"This is bullshit!" Mike croaked. "Why can't they just breed these things to not crap huh?"

"Shut up and let's get this over with." Jimmy made his way to the first table and lifted up the sticky note in front of it. "5" it read. He peered inside the cage and sure enough, counted the mother cat, a black beauty with bright yellow eyes and her four kittens, one black like her, one orange and the other two gray. The mother cat looked over to the man standing over her cage, studying him closely. Jimmy noticed this and became annoyed. "The fuck you looking at?" He grabbed the top of the cage and shook it slightly, startling the cat and forcing her to her feet. The kittens, still preoccupied with suckling at that moment, fell to the floor with a cry. The sight was enough to make Jimmy burst into laughter.

"Hah ha! Hey Mike! Check this out!" Jimmy turned toward Mike, half expecting him to already be joining him in his amused uproar. Instead, the 40-year old man stood still with his back to his coworker, his hands to his throat. "Mike? You alright?" As Jimmy approached his coworker, he thought he could hear the sound of gurgling as if someone was being forced to drink the nonstop onslaught of tap water streaming from a kitchen sink. This noise, along with the smell of blood in the air chilled Jimmy to the core. Something wasn't right here and he knew it. M-Mike! Answer me!" Jimmy demanded in a shaky voice.

Finally heeding his coworker's call, Mike turned to face Jimmy. His eyes, usually too tired and lethargic to open past half a lid, were wide with fear and panic. His lips were pursed against each other hard and a trickle of blood flowed from in between them down to his chin. His two hands, also covered in blood, were clasped tightly around his neck.

"Jesus fucking Christ!" Jimmy screamed. "Mike!"

From the darkness behind Mike, a masked figure emerged. It grabbed Mike's hair and pulled his head back with a rough yank, forcing his hand away from his throat. The open wound they were struggling so hard to keep closed was ripped open even wider, blood gushing all over Jimmy and the ground around his feet.

"Good God!" Jimmy cried as he tried in vain to shield himself from the red spray with his hands. He turned to run, only to slip on some of the blood that had fallen on the floor. He fell down, smacking his forehead against the concrete in the process. The impact cracked his skull from inside his head and he became dazed and confused, almost forgetting what it was he was running from. Panicked, he tried to crawl away from the scene, away from this garage of death and to his pickup truck so he could drive himself to the hospital. He just remembered that he had no health insurance when a searing pain spread through his back, causing him to cry out. He was pulled back into the puddle of blood he had slipped on and felt the horrible sensation of something being ripped out of his back. Then he was grabbed by the arm and flipped onto his back.

The figure, which he could now tell without a shadow of a doubt was a woman, loomed over him, the knife she had dug into his back inches away from his face. "Tell me where Mr. Wolfe is!" She demanded.

"P-Please don't kill me!" Jimmy blubbered. "P-Please..." Tears streamed down his face but the masked assailant showed no pity and demonstrated as such by stomping onto his throat.

"Where is Mr. Wolfe!?" She screamed. Her eyes from behind the mask reflected pure, almost primal rage.

"I-I-In the farmhouse!" Jimmy finally spat out. "In the farmhouse! Now please-

But Jimmy would never get to finish his sentence. Because as soon as she got the information she desired, the Animal Avenger rammed the knife into the bruised spot in Jimmy's forehead, the damaged skull offering little protection as the blade slid into his brain. The final thought Jimmy Mondo had in his life was how the inside of his nostrils smelled like pennies.

"Who rocks the house? We say that that Barracudas rock the house and when the Barracudas rock the house, Stop! Wait a minute! You really think we meant it?" Jessica paused her cheer for a quick giggle before she and the rest of the squad continued. "Who rocks the house? We say that Pumas rock the house and when the Pumas rock the house, they rock it all day long!"

"Those floozies!" One of the Barracudas cursed. "For a second, I thought they were cheering for our team." He brought his head back to the game a second too late as he was suddenly tackled by a Springfield Puma. Ever since Nelson silenced the heckler known as Homer Jay Simpson, things have been turning around for the Pumas with the score now being 12 to 8. At this point in the game, however, most of the attention was focused on the cheer squad as they attempted to form a pyramid. Bart, in particular was focused on Jessica as she made her way to the top.

"You know they're wearing shorts underneath those skirts right?" Milhouse's voice rang in his ears.

"W-What?" Bart stammered.

"I said most of the cheerleaders wear shorts underneath their skirts." Milhouse repeated nonchalantly. "So you're wasting your time trying to peek."

"What kind of creep do you take me for!?" Bart slapped Milhouse over the back of the head, knocking down his glasses. "I wasn't trying to peek up anything."

Milhouse felt around for his glasses, found them near his feet and placed the now crooked bi-spectacles on his face. "Then why are you staring at them so intently?"

"I wasn't!" Bart felt his face heating up and looked away. "It's...just..."

"Bart's got a crush on Jessica Lovejoy...again." Maggie butted in, her eyes never leaving the field.

"Mags! What the hell!?" Bart scolded, his face now a steaming crimson.

"What? Its not like it's a big secrets or anything. You can see it from space!" Maggie lifted her hands up into the air as she said this.

"Whatever!" Bart slumped back into his seat, only to feel Milhouse pat his shoulder.

"I feel your pain brother. It's hard when the girl of your dreams won't even give you the time of day." He sighed.

Bart cocked an eyebrow. "Lisa told you the time today at school."

"Yeah. She sure did." Milhouse said dreamily, clearly lost in his own mind. Bart sighed and tried to focus on the game. Despite his best efforts, however, his gaze involuntarily shifted toward Jessica as she sang out cheers for the Pumas.

"Man. Adolescence bites." He thought as he watched the pyramid undo itself.

It took Lisa three minutes to recompose herself after the excitement of slaying Mr. Wolfe's two employees. She needed to get her head clear if she was to confront him. Breathing heavily beneath her mask, she stepped out of the garage and made her way toward the farmhouse nearby. The night air chilled the sweat against the bare skin on her arms and legs and for a moment, Lisa felt herself shiver. She couldn't tell if it was from the chill of the night air or the adrenaline in her system. She decided that it did not matter and quickened her pace toward the farmhouse.

The door was unlocked and as Lisa stepped inside, she found herself in a rather well-kept room, a little cozy space with a speckled couch and a picture of The Birth of Venus hanging above it, no doubt appreciated more for the free female nudity within the picture than for the integrity of the art itself. A open doorway at the end of the room revealed a figure sitting at the table in the kitchen with his back to Lisa. He seemed to be on the phone.

"Wolfe!" Lisa shouted. "Don't get up from that spot!" Drawing one of her knives, Lisa stomped toward the man who slowly raised his arms in surrender. Once she was close enough, she dug the tip of her knife into the back of his neck, drawing just the tiniest amount of blood from the skin. "Do you know who I am?" She growled.

"Judging by that less than pleased tone of voice you've got and those screams I heard a few minutes ago, I take it you're the Animal Avenger people've been talking about." The man spoke in a heavy New York accent. "I gotta say, I never expected that psycho to be a broad."

Lisa growled again but said nothing.

"I'm going to assume that those two dunderheads are sleeping with the fishes now, eh?" He asked nonchalantly.

"You could say that." Lisa answered coldly. "Turn around slowly and don't try anything funny." Lisa backed up to allow this man, Mr. Wolfe, to turn himself around. He was a short gruff man with a grey hat, scraggly beard and a cigar in his mouth. His eyes were beady and cold, the perfect make of a soulless business man. The corners of his lips curved into a small smile upon seeing Lisa's figure. "Not bad." He cooed.

Lisa ignored his lecherous leering and held out her hand. "Give me the phone."

Wolfe pointed to the device that he currently had pressed between his ear and shoulder. "You mean this thing?" He chuckled softly. "This ain't no phone."

"Give it!" Lisa growled. "I won't ask you again!"

Wolfe's smile faltered and he handed the device over to Lisa who quickly looked it over. At once, she saw that Wolfe was right. It wasn't a phone but rather a walkie-talkie. And white noise was still coming out of it.

"Wolfe!" A voice suddenly spoke from the walkie-talkie. "You still there?"

"For now." Wolfe answered. "But I got a little visitor with me. The one we've been talking about."

"You're kidding!" The voice exclaimed. "Well don't keep me in suspense. What does the crazy bastard look like?"

"That's just it!" Wolfe croaked. "Turns out this crazy bastard is a crazy bitch!"

"You for real?" The voice chuckled as well. "There's no way some broad killed all those guys by herself."

"She managed to take out those fuckwads on my payroll easily." Wolfe said. "And now she's standing right in front of me."

"Is that right?" The voice asked.

"Gato?" Lisa asked uneasily.

There was a moment of silence from the walkie-talkie before the voice returned. "Holy shit it is a woman!" It shouted.

"Where are you!?" Lisa demanded, the grip on her knife tightening with anger.

"No where you need to concern yourself with sweetcheeks." Gato followed this sentence with a click. "Me and my boys have just packed up operations and are on our way out of this town."

"No!" Lisa shouted.

"Oh don't worry honey! We left all the little puppie-wuppies back at the farm for you to play with. They'd just be dead weight at this point."

Lisa gritted her teeth as both Gato and Wolfe laughed. "But what about your friend!? You do realize I'm going to kill him right?"

"Go right ahead!" Wolfe dared. "I've been in the business of crime for years kid. Me and Gato have always been prepared to die at a moment's notice. We made a pact long ago that if push came to shove, one of us would gladly sacrifice themselves for the other." Wolfe stretched his arms and held them behind himself. "Besides, Gato's got connections in Shelbyville. Once the dust settles, he'll be bringing out some real bad guys. Monsters that would make even Fat Tony crawl under the bed in fear. They'll find you doll." Wolfe moved the cigar to the other side of his mouth with his tongue. "And they'll make you wish you were never born."

From behind the mask, Lisa's eyes reflected fear and shock as she slowly backed away. Both men burst into laughter at their plan, Wolfe in particular imagining all the horrible things Gato and his men would do to the little wrench in revenge for killing him. Part of him wished that he could join in on the fun...

...And then Gato's voice was cut off by the sound on an explosion, stopping Wolfe's in its tracks. "Wh...What?"

Lisa's fearful glance quickly betrayed her true feelings of vicious confidence, her lips curving into an almost feral sneer underneath the mask. "What's wrong Wolfe? Cat got your tongue?" Lisa took a moment to mentally kick herself for making such a lame pun before taking a step toward Wolfe, causing the unnerved man to panic and fall out of his chair, the cigar falling away from his mouth and rolling under the table. He scrambled backwards on the floor as Lisa continued to follow him.

"W-What happened?" Wolfe cried out. "Gato! Speak to me!"

But the walkie-talkie had already gone silent. Not even white noise. As if the other walkie-talkie it was connected to had simply vanished into thin air. Lisa dropped the now useless device to the floor and kicked it away as she pointed her blade at Wolfe.

"You bitch!" He screamed as tears fell from his face. "What did you do?"

"Its simple really." Lisa casually answered. "Your business partner fell right into my trap."

About a minute ago..

"Oh don't worry honey! We left all the little puppie-wuppies back at the farm for you to play with. They'd just be dead weight at this point." Gato cooed into the walkie-talkie. The middle-aged New Yorker with tan skin and a bald head rolled his head back in laughter alongside his doomed associate and the two young men in the backseat of his car. They had received the warning call from Wolfe that his mill was under attack from the Animal Avenger and as luck would have it, their planned escape route was just outside the door. All they had to do was drive straight through Blinky Road, an old dusty road hardly anyone used anymore and they would be outside of Springfield within the next hour. All the dogs and puppies that Gato and his men had been peddling like counterfeit purses were still at the farmhouse, no doubt polluting the country air with their excessive barking and howling. Part of Gato was glad to leave those walking shit machines behind. He already had other plans for his meal tickets lined up.

"But what about your friend?" The Animal Avenger, who as it turned out, was a crazy broad, asked. "You do realize I'm going to kill him right?"

Gato opened his mouth to explain the arrangement that he had with Wolfe but his trusted partner beat him to the punch. As he overheard Wolfe explain the situation over the walkie-talkie, he thought back to their boyhood days, kicking cats and teachers alike. Bumming cigarettes and plowing broads. He recalled the slow but steady decent into crime that neither man had come to regret since and the day they made that pact.

"Is that true boss?" One of his men asked. "Do you know some guys in Shelbyville?"

"I do." Gato confirmed. "And once we get nice and settled there, we'll be making a return trip for that Animal Avenger skank." Gato felt a warmth in his lower regions at the thought of taking this crazed woman, this apparent modern-day amazon who had somehow managed to slay so many men before and breaking her spirit until she was a tame little kitten. Even his rotten heart was somewhat mournful of the fate that was to befall his best friend in the world but it would be all worth it when-

-And that's when his thought processes stopped.

At that precise moment, as his car sped over Blinky Road, the spinning tires made contact with a strand of string. This string happed to be tied to nuclear rods at either side of the dead road and as the string was gripped by the cervices within the rubber and dragged down, the ends of the string were pulled forward. The sudden severing of their upper halves through this process was more than enough of the external force the unstable rods needed to unleash their horrible potential for destruction. The blast was fast but powerful. Anyone within fifty miles could see a lime-green pillar form in the sky and hear the great rumbling that followed. Gato, his men, and the car were disintegrated at once. By the time, the smoke cleared and the pillar dissipated, all that would be left of the dog-traffickers was a green puddle of goo on the road.

"You really dropped the ball letting your lackey in on all that information." Lisa sighed as she moved the knife along her fingers. "Honestly, it was almost too easy. Not only were those bastards planning to ditch those poor dogs at the first sign of danger like the pussies they were but their escape route was the single least-used road in all of Springfield! Sure, their might be the chance of some poor wild animal might get hurt in the blast but that's just a chance I have to take." Lisa sighed sadly as she lamented the damage to the environment she was forced to perform. Wolfe would pay for that dearly.

"You bitch!" Wolfe cried out. "You'll burn in Hell for this! You hear me! Hell!"

Lisa turned her attention back to the tearful man and brandished her knife. "You first." For the next 10 minutes, the ranch surrounding the farmhouse was filled with Wolfe's tortured screams.

The crowd went wild as the Pumas landed yet another touchdown. Now they were neck to neck with the Barracudas and the next score would decide the winner. The Simpson family was so caught up in the action that they barely noticed Lisa rushing back to their side of the bleachers until she shoved herself between Bart and Homer. Had they not been so focused on the game, they might have noticed how haphazardly she wore her band uniform. "Hey guys! What I miss?"

"Lis!?" Bart nearly fell out of his seat. "Where have you been? You pretty much missed the whole game!"

"I'm sorry!" She apologized. "I bumped into an old friend in the bathroom and sort of lost track of the time." She turned her attention to the field. "So what's the score?"

"It's a tie right now!" Bart answered. "This last play will decide the winner!" Just then, every patron on the Puma's bleachers stood in their seats and began to chant "Pumas! Pumas! Pumas!" Naturally, Marge, Maggie, Milhouse, Bart and even Homer, who was barely recovering from the blow he had taken earlier, joined in. "Come on Lis!" Maggie chirped before continuing with her own chant.

Lisa sighed happily and added her voice to the cacophony of football fans. From the other side of the field, the visitors from Shelbyville began the same process directed at their Barracudas. Through the chants, Lisa could hear her father call out "Copycats!"

The teams took their final positions on the field. The Puma's helmets rubbed against those of the Barracudas and every single young man on that field had the same goal in mind: To bring home the gold.

"Skin those cats!" Someone from the visitor's side demanded.

"Fry those fish!" A member of the Puma's supporters called out in response. The air was filled with the cheers and jeers of the audience as the players mentally prepped themselves for the final turn.

The referee blew his whistle. Nelson snatched the ball and jumped to his feet before the Barracuda before him could pounce. Stepping back quickly, he launched the ball toward Michael who was already making his way toward the goal line. The dark-skinned boy caught the ball and quickened his pace. It was not enough, however, as three Barracudas formed a wall in front of him, forcing him to turn.

"Shit!" Nelson cursed as he ran toward the goal line. He had seen this maneuver many times in play. Hell, his own team had performed it once or twice. By throwing off Michael's momentum at the last minute, the Barracudas hoped to steal the ball and kick it to their own goal.

But Nelson wasn't about to let that happen.

"Michael! Over here!" Nelson shouted to his teammate, his arms high above his head. Michael, knowing he was doomed as far as this play was concerned, tossed the ball to Nelson without any hesitation. No sooner that he did so that the Barracudas tackled him to the ground. Nelson growled with anger at his fallen comrade, caught the ball, and rushed to the goal line.

Another Barracuda noticed Nelson and tried to block him, only to be mercilessly shoved into the ground for his troubles. Nelson quickened his pace and rushed to the goal line. Although he did not dare to look, he could feel the tremble of half the entire Shelbyville Barracudas stampeding after him like raging bulls. It was now or never, it a ferocious battle cry, Nelson slammed the ball down onto the ground behind the goal line.

The referee blew his whistle again. It was over. The Springfield Pumas had won.

The audience grew wild on both ends, cheers and victorious howling for the Puma's side, jeers and curses from the Barracuda's side. Nelson's teammates picked him up off the ground and carried him over their shoulders toward the bench where the water cooler was kept. "Oh shit! No!" Nelson laughed as two of his teammates grabbed the cooler and dumped its contents all over him.

"Alright! Way to use some defense!" Homer shouted, only to groan in pain as he held his stomach. "Ohh.. Can we go home now?"

"Sure Homer." Marge answered. "Come on kids! Let's hit the road!" The Simpson family got up from their seats and made their way to the bottom of the bleachers. As they walked toward the exit, Milhouse tapped Lisa on the shoulder, grabbing her attention.

"So Lisa, some of the guys are gonna hit up Krusty Burger after this. You wanna come?" He asked in the most flirtatious voice he could muster.

"Milhouse, you know I don't eat at Krusty Burger anymore." Lisa replied. "Not since they replaced all their produce with animal by-product to make the burgers "extra-meaty" She used air quotations for those last two words.

"Oh...right..."

"Besides, I gotta some homework that needs doing back home. I'm sorry Milhouse." Lisa patted him on the head and continued on her way out of the bleachers. Bart was waiting for her at the end and began speaking once she was walking besides him.

"I know he's not exactly grade-A material Lis, but can't you give the poor guy a chance?"

"Bart." Lisa sighed. "We've been over this. Its not fair to try to hook me up with your friend just because of his crush on me. Besides, its not like I hate Milhouse. I just...can't reciprocate his feelings and that wouldn't be fair to him either."

"Maybe but he doesn't know that." Bart sighed. "All he knows is that he loves you. You. Lisa Simpson. Of all human females in the world." He clicked his teeth and shook his head. "That poor deluded bastard."

"Fuck off!" Lisa giggled as she shoved an also giggling Bart. The sibling's affectionate stand-off was abruptly stopped by the sound of their youngest sibling gagging. "Gross! Why are they doing that here?"

Bart and Lisa looked down to the disgusted Maggie as she pointed to the bleachers. Behind them, Nelson Muntz and Jessica Lovejoy, the Captain of the Football Team and Cheerleaders respectively, were passionately making out. Nelson even had one of his hands under her raised leg.

"Gross!" Maggie turned away and continued to gag as Bart and Lisa watched the scene unfold. The eldest son of the Simpson clan couldn't help but feel a pang of jealousy toward Nelson although he would never admit it. "I give it a week." He heard Lisa remark, a look of disappointment on her eyes. "Y-Yeah." He agreed. "So do I."

The two siblings continued their journey to the parking lot, making it a conscious point not to stare back at the newly formed couple. Both were disgusted by the public display of affection and wanted to leave as soon as possible. To climb into the car and leave those two PDA degenerates behind...

...along with the tang of jealousy they both held in their hearts.

(So yeah. Not my best work. I do apologize if I butchered the rules of football in this chapter, I'm not the best at sports. That being said, I promise the next story arc will be more thought-out and more disturbing. For now, all I'll say is that sometimes the scariest enemy you can face is yourself.)