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The Highs and Lows of a Yenta

Melusine found him in the barn, "We need to talk."

"Nice to see you're not trying to kill yourself or anyone who's talking to you these days." Blackwall didn't look up from his work. He'd been crafting wooden toys for the refugee children in his off time, further solidifying Melusine's theory that he was the definition of a teddy bear. "What do we need to talk about?"

"You and Lace." That got Blackwall's attention. He paused in his movements, set down his tools, and turned to stoke the fire. "I've seen the way you two look at each other, how you almost can't help but gravitate to one another when we're in the field, or the rare occasion she gets to come back here." Melusine moved across the barn to stand at his side. "Why haven't you said something to her? Or done something?"

Blackwall smirked, 'I don't know what you're on about, Mel."

"Don't play coy; it doesn't fit your complexion." Melusine channeled her inner Vivienne with her words and earned an amused glance from Blackwall. "Seriously, though, Blackwall, when are you going to do something?"

"You really think now is the time to be doing anything with anyone?" Blackwall shook his head and returned to his workbench. "I need to finish this before La-" he corrected himself, "Scout Harding returns. She takes a lot of these with her to the villages most hard-hit when she passes through."

Melusine threw her arms in the air, "See? You're even working together like Santa and Mrs. Klaus together! How can you not see that the two of you are the most adorable match made this side of the Veil?"

"I never disagreed with your assessment," Blackwall chuckled at Melusine's look of excitement, "I just said I don't think now is the time to be doing anything selfish like pursuing romantic entanglements." His face grew shuttered then, and it wasn't the first time Melusine got the feeling the man had a lot more in his past than he cared to admit to. "There's too much weight on these matters to leave us the freedom to think about things like that. I work alone, always have and always will, and a Warden's life isn't the type to welcome romance."

Melusine grabbed his shoulders and turned him to face her, "We aren't guaranteed tomorrow, Blackwall. And we've all done shitty things in our past. Those two facts are enough, in my opinion, to at least risk having a much-needed conversation about possibilities with her." She stepped back. "I think you'll find her far more receptive than you might fear."

"All right then," Blackwall crossed his arms over his chest and gave her a challenging look, "I'll have that conversation when YOU have that conversation."

"What?"

Blackwall smirked, "Your complexion also don't look right with coy, Mel. We've all seen the way you look at Cullen, and we all see how he skirts around you as well." Melusine broke eye contact and glared at the fire as if it was at fault for this conversation going awry. "Seems like you two should be having a conversation just as much as me and Lace."

"Circumstances are different for me, Blackwall. And you know it. Where you and Lace are on equal footing and obviously reciprocate," Melusine pinched the bridge of her nose as she closed her eyes, "even if I tried to reassure that we were on equal footing, Cullen is so caught up in tradition and expectations that I doubt he'd ever consider it. Not to mention the fact that I'm not human, and he seems the type to prefer his own kind alone." Melusine dropped her hand and shook her head, " I'm a coward, yes, but I'm also versed enough in rejection to see it before risking it. Even if there is an obvious awareness between us, circumstances being what they are, it is more likely for another Breach to open in the earth to swallow all of us than for Cullen Rutherford to ever look at me as a legitimate possibility for anything more than cordial friendship."

Blackwall grunted, either in agreement or not, Melusine wasn't certain, but it seemed he no longer seemed interested in arguing against her. Before he could return to his work, Melusine touched his shoulder.

"Please, at least think seriously about talking to her. I know it isn't my business but, maybe because it seems impossible for me to have anything I'm so obsessed with this, knowing that you and Lace are happy in the tentative pursuit of something would mean the world to me. But," Melusine backed away, "you're the only one to live your life, so it's up to you. See you at the tavern later?"

Blackwall nodded, though his eyes had taken on a distant note, and Melusine left. She was nearing the archery field when she spotted one of Bull's Chargers. It was Krem, the one who'd alerted her to Bull's interest in the Inquisition. She wasn't an archer, so it was strange to see her lurking near the field, but when Melusine drew closer, she saw why Krem was hovering. Only a few people were in the field practicing, including Sera and Leliana. Krem was leaning against the wall of the building next to the archery field, admiring the movements of someone training. The question remained: which was it? Melusine stayed out of immediate sight, just on the other side of a building, but still with an unobstructed view.

"Ah," Bull's voice right over her shoulder startled Melusine, and she inwardly cursed at the Qunari for his ability to be big and silent, "I see you found my young Charger lusting after your spymaster."

Melusine's eyes widened, "That's the one she likes?" Melusine looked back to the field, and upon closer observation, Krem's eyes were on Leliana's figure and tracked her as she retrieved arrows and returned to position. "How did you know? Was it your Ben Hassrath senses?"

"My Chargers talk to me, boss. I told you before, we're a small group, but we're close. Nothing happens to my Chargers I'm not aware of."

"Is that a dig at my own company and position?" Melusine glanced at Bull but kept most of her attention on the scene before her.

"Not exactly, but if it helps, then sure." Bull smiled. "I just don't want Krem to do anything stupid. Like, get her heartbroken. It may help fuel a fight for a time, but it also gets people killed faster."

The Qunari started toward the central courtyard, and though Melusine wanted to see if anything else happened between Krem and Leliana, she fell in with Bull. They walked a few paces, at least out of earshot, before Melusine questioned more.

"Do you think her feelings are reciprocated? Or is it one-sided?"

"I'm sure the spymaster would accommodate some quick fucks if Krem played her cards right and was patient enough to see how the hand falls." Bull looked amused at his own intended pun. "But it'll be a long, hard haul before there's an interest in anything more than physical. You spymaster is almost like a Qunari in that." He smiled down at Melusine, and she imagined he would've winked the missing eye. "We like to play easy to get but hard to keep."

"How noble of you." Melusine rolled her eyes. "Are we still playing Wicked Grace tonight?"

Bull laughed, "I wouldn't miss the opportunity to tease Dorian about that knight-captain. See you later, boss."

Melusine laughed to herself as she crossed into another small courtyard. Usually, it was intended for hand-to-hand training, but at the moment, it was deserted save for one woman. Cassandra. Melusine paused at the entrance and tried to figure out what it was that kept Cassandra so unaware of her presence. She drew near and saw a book laid open in the Seeker's lap. Melusine's eyes widened. Was it what she thought it was?

"Good book, eh?" Melusine alerted Cassandra to her presence before she got into striking range.

It was a good thing for Cassandra surged to her feet and stumbled backward in a matter of seconds, "I don't know what you're talking about!"

"Oh yes, because suddenly I went blind, and I didn't see the book in your hand that looks suspiciously like the book I gave you yesterday at breakfast." Melusine rolled her eyes at the ridiculous attempt at lying.

"This? No, these are just…reports, from Commander Cullen."

"You really suck at lying; you know that, right?" Melusine laughed. "I guess that makes you an excellent Seeker."

Cassandra tipped her chin up, "It's of no interest to you what this book is." Melusine crossed her arms over her chest and made it evident that she wasn't about to leave. "Fine, it is Swords and Shields. I hadn't realized you had the latest chapter until yesterday."

"The 'latest' chapter meaning…you've read them all?" Melusine's eyes widened. "And here I thought I was INTRODUCING you to smut!"

Cassandra looked exceedingly uncomfortable, but it was to her credit that she hadn't decked Melusine yet, "I haven't continued since this all began. We've been too busy."

"She's read one three times." Cole startled them both with his sudden appearance.

"You," Cassandra pointed at him with a glare, "I told you to stop spying."

Cole looked confused and dejected as he wandered away, "But you read it out loud to me." He sighed and spoke over his shoulder before disappearing, "I don't like the captain, either."

Melusine saw Cassandra open and close her fist, her grip on the book almost crushing it. She took in a slow, deep breath and slowly let it out before she spoke again.

"It's literature. Smutty…literature. Whatever you do," she drew close and used her height to try to intimidate Melusine, "don't tell Varric."

Melusine put a hand to her chest, "What, me? No, I would never."

"I admit, they're terrible. And magnificent. And this one ends in a cliffhanger," Cassandra held the book in a close embrace, "I know Varric is working on the next, he must be!"

Melusine didn't have the heart to tell Cassandra that he'd only updated it again because she'd been an ass to him nearly a week before. Cassandra narrowed her gaze and shifted on her feet to move away.

"Pretend you don't know this about me."

Melusine left the Seeker to her reading and immediately sought Varric. She found him in his room, pouring over papers, with his fingers stained with ink and his glasses perched haphazardly on his nose. Melusine allowed herself the momentary fantasy of seeing Cassandra storm into the room and ravishing the adorable looking dwarf. But then she shook herself and approached her friend.

"Cassandra is waiting for the next issue of Swords and Shields."

Varric looked up, his hands still full of papers and quill, "I must have heard that wrong. It sounded like you just said Cassandra read my books. My smutty books."

"What's so surprising about that?" Melusine sat on the corner of Varric's desk. "You're an excellent storyteller. And you've said it before, oh so charming."

Varric rolled his eyes and set down the papers, "You have met Cassandra, haven't you?" He leaned back in his chair. "Is this more of your imaginative assumption that the Seeker has an interest in me?"

"Nope, I just left her in a secluded area of Skyhold, clutching your latest chapter to her chest as she lamented the cliffhanger." Melusine's lips twitched as she fought against a smile. She knew if she smiled too much, Varric would assume she was lying.

"Did you say the book I gave you?" Melusine nodded. "Well, she'll be waiting a while, then. I haven't finished it, and I wasn't planning to. I only wrote that to get you over a hurdle. That book is easily the worst I've ever written. The last issue hardly said enough to pay for the ink."

"Be that as it may, Cassandra seems to be hooked on it. Enough to recognize that this was the 'latest' chapter." Varric's eyebrows rose. "Are you still going to deny that there might be something there?"

Varric shook his head, "And I honestly thought a hole in the sky was the weirdest thing that could happen. So," he continued to shake his head in fascinated confusion, "you want me to finish writing the latest issue of my worst serial? For Cassandra." He chuckled. "That's such a terrible idea. I have to do it. On one condition: I get to be there when you give her the book. I want to see for myself her rejection and my confirmation."

"I look forward to the exchange." Melusine grinned, already aware of the fact that both Varric and Cassandra would have their boots knocked off in surprise.

Someone cleared their throat by the door. Both Varric and Melusine looked up to find Cullen standing in the doorway. Melusine fought to keep a neutral expression. They hadn't spoken, just the two of them, since she'd run from him in the training field. Not only had he not come to her after talking to Dorian, which Dorian informed her Cullen had sought him out, and Dorian had told him everything, but he'd also kept up nearly as strong a distance between them as when he'd first found out about her Taninoui form. Apparently, her assumptions about his prudish, Disney prince like mannerisms were worse than she'd thought.

"I'm sorry to disturb you two," Melusine glanced at Varric in surprise, but the dwarf shrugged, "but the latest reports about the red templars are in, and we need to decide quickly how we are to respond to them."

"I'll be right behind you." Melusine smiled, but Cullen disappeared from view without returning the expression. "Is it just me," she looked at Varric, "or is he being really…something towards me?"

Varric laughed, "In this case, you're not using a fanciful imagination. Our dear Commander has been off for a few days now, and even I can't seem to figure it out. But it isn't just you he's being surly with. I'm getting more flack than normal too. And I don't remember pissing him off recently." Varric shrugged again. "You go do your Inquisitorness stuff, and I'll get to work on your 'gift' for Cassandra. Should have it done by tonight."

"So soon?" Melusine hopped off his desk.

"It doesn't take much brainpower or time to write smut, Mel." He nodded towards the door. "Good luck with him."

"Thanks. See you at the tavern." She hurried from his room, excited at the prospect of seeing Cassandra and Varric confront the "thing" between them through this book and also tentatively cautious about why in the hell Cullen was being an ass, again.