The next chapter or two will feature various mayhem from the Winter Palace quest. Cheers!

The Third Time

Melusine mimicked her companions by pulling at the collar of her jacket. She both thought it adorable and absolutely stupid that they all wore matching outfits. Every. Last. One. Of. Them. According to Josephine, it was to help distinguish their group from the rest of the Court. Leliana concurred that it would help them find one another, and Cullen also sided with the argument, considering they all believed something drastic would happen while at the ball. But when Melusine had been informed of a "fancy dress" opportunity, she had secretly desired a more Cinderella-like outfit and less Prince Charming. She almost wished she'd had time to teach her companions a line dance like Cha-cha slide or Cupid Shuffle because dressed like this, and they'd look freaking amazing.

"I adore the heady blend of power, intrigue, danger, and sex that permeates these events." Solas' comment surprised Melusine, and her expressive reaction earned a chuckle from him as they made their way through the outer courts of the palace.

Cassandra snorted as she followed behind, tugging at the formal jacket as much as Melusine, if not more, "This ball is a waste of time, like all Orlesian foolishness."

"Really, my dear?" Vivienne didn't bother looking over her shoulder as she spoke to the Seeker, the amused disdain dripping from her voice, "I find it ironic that you would say such a thing."

"What, what do you mean?" Cassandra was already scowling, aware that Vivienne had a less than a stellar opinion of anyone aside from herself.

"To you, Orlesians pretend that petty squabbles are a game, correct?" Vivienne smiled and gave a gracious bow to a passing noble. When she spoke again, it was at a softer level, "That they treat murder, corruption, and deceit as delightful amusements?"

Cassandra blinked, "Do they not?"

"I suppose they do, but, remember my dear, wars are won through bloodlines and names. Legacies are built on the backs of those who deal out the orders, not those who take them. These amusements led to the creation of your order, and others like them, including my own. Try not to look down so far you can't see past the end of your own crooked nose." Vivienne gave another formal bow to another old acquaintance, and so didn't see Sera's obscene gesture made behind her back.

"We're here to save Empress Celene, and I can't help but wonder why?" Cassandra shook her head and sighed, "How come she merits our protection when Gaspard would see the true threat and not spend his time throwing balls and writing letters."

Solas paused and studied Cassandra, "You support the civil war?"

"No," Cassandra looked ready to throttle the next person who questioned her, "but chaos is what Corypheus wants, and we must oppose him."

Varric spared everyone from Cassandra's wrath by reaching out and patting Cassandra's arm. "Yes, you are a Seeker, after all." Cassandra rolled her eyes and huffed, but thankfully didn't implode.

"The fate of the powerful have always been the same, only the costumes change." Solas chimed in again. "What we do here may affect our current situation, but it is important to remember that it will have little bearing in the centuries to come."

Melusine shook her head at the ever-positive elven apostate. Of her companions, only Leliana, Vivienne, and Josephine looked like they were pleased to be present at the Orlesian Court. Everyone else was ranging from tortured to annoyed. It all thoroughly entertained Melusine and she had every intention of keeping it that way, as she also sought to solve a few mysteries Holmes style.

"Inquisitor," Melusine raised her eyebrows at Josephine's formality but remembered her advisor was on "home turf" and would lapse back into certain protocols, "before we proceed further, may I have a word? I'm sure you know how to handle most nobility but-"

"You and I both know my ability for diplomacy and decorum is only marginally better than Bull's or Sera's." Melusine interrupted, earning a grunt of agreement from Bull and a laugh from Sera. "Are we forgetting that I beheaded a cleric of the Chantry without trial or warning?" Sera laughed at the mention of one of her favorite memories.

Josephine sighed, "Yes, well, they intentionally made sure you had no weapon, so there should be no beheadings tonight."

"What? You mean, we'll only be left with double-dealing, elegant poison canapes, and an overabundance of lavender perfume?" Dorian feigned shock and horror. "Pity. Add a few sacrificial slaves, some blood magic, and good beheading, and you could mistake this for a soiree in the Imperium. I half expect my mother to materialize from the crowd and criticize my manners and drag me out by my earlobe."

Thom eyed Dorian strangely, "I'm having a hard time picturing that."

"Picture me as a young boy of five years old, she certainly always has."

Melusine laughed, along with Thom, at both Dorian's words and the mental image. Varric's additional comment made even Vivienne smile, slightly, "I always enjoy canapes while surrounded by people who want to kill me."

"Please," Josephine was looking flabbergasted, and Melusine took pity on her long enough to straighten her face into one of neutrality instead of amusement, "it is no simple matter of etiquette and protocol here. Every word, every gesture is measured and evaluated for weakness."

Her control didn't last long, "Why haven't we invited the Court to dinner at Skyhold? I bet they'd be wonderful at Go Fish."

"This Game is like Wicked Grace; it is played to the death," Leliana added her two cents to Josephine's plea. "You must never reveal your cards."

"Good thing I left my deck in Skyhold."

Leliana and Josephine spoke at once, "Melusine…"

"Sorry," Melusine felt chastised like a five-year-old Dorian, "I deal with anxiety through humor and sarcasm. You should be used to that by now, what with Dorian, Varric, Sera, Bull, Thom, well damn near everyone who surrounds you in Skyhold."

Josephine ignored Melusine's comment and continued to lead the group slowly but surely through the gardens toward the main palace area, "When you meet the Empress, the eyes of the entire Court will be upon you. I fear you would be safer sealing the breach than here."

"We would all be safer, sealing the breach than here." Dorian turned back to look at the group, his eyes wide, as he not so subtly pointed. "Did you see what that Marquis was wearing? That suit is a greater crime than anything we're looking for." Dorian took a second look and shuddered.

Cullen sighed and sarcastically remarked, "We appreciate your sacrifice, Dorian."

"Exposing myself to all this exquisite finery and exotic wines?" Dorian's smile grew. "Yes, such a hardship."

Sera began to mutter to herself, and at Melusine's questioning look, she shrugged, "You'd think this lot was smelling cabbage, the way they wrinkle their noses at us." Sera made eye contact with passing nobles and not so diffidently made commentary, "Crotch rot. Piss pot. He's a she. Bastard. Extra toes. Beats his squire." She grinned at Melusine. "What a fun, close-marrying crowd."

"Yes, Sera, that's precisely the sort of thing-" Cole, who had at some point disappeared and now reappeared in their path, interrupted Josephine and the group's progress.

Cole's voice was as lost as ever when he spoke, "The faces, they talk even when they aren't moving."

"What did you say, kid?" Varric stepped closer to the youth.

"Silk on satin on skin, always wanting, chased but chased too many. They have faces inside their faces, lying with a layer that tells the truth. I don't know how to help them."

Varric laughed, "A stiff drink always helps me, kid."

"Cullen is afraid." All eyes turned to Cullen, who looked ready to run back to Skyhold. "They're going to hunt him, following fear. He shouldn't be here." It wasn't clear if that was a warning or Cullen's thoughts interpreted through Cole.

"Cole I don't think-"

Thom spoke over Cullen, "It's true. You might need a bodyguard. I may have lost count, but you've already had three different ladies, and four men ask you for a dance. And didn't you already receive an offer of marriage from that countess?"

"I hate Court." Cullen rubbed gloved fingers against his temples. "The headache I'm developing is far preferable to the company." He quickly glanced around, a blush touching his cheeks, "Present company excepted."

Cole began to lilt back towards the main palace, somehow in the lead of their ragtag group. "A fallen fan can cut like a kiss, hot breath from the wrong boy on the naked nape of the neck. I helped until they made me stop. Now they've all forgotten.

"Cole, please stay out of trouble." Josephine sounded tired, and the night had barely begun.

Bull came back to the group. He'd missed most of the recent interlude due to his quick perimeter exploration. The look on his face spoke volumes. "Please tell me we get to kill something tonight."

"I'm sure we can arrange it," Melusine smiled, "why the increased desire for mayhem?"

"Been here ten minutes, and these nobles keep messing with me, and they think I don't know they're doing it. If this keeps up, I'm gonna wear somebody's skull as my fancy little mask. And seriously, they're no good as disguises. They don't cover the mouth or hide body language, so they're not much help for lying. As fashion goes, I guess I've seen dumber."

Vivienne, the only member of their group wearing an Orlesian mask, sighed, "I doubt your taste in fashion quite measures the same here."

Bull ignored Vivienne and held out his hand to Melusine. She eyed the contents cradled in his palm but waited for his explanation, "They've got these candied nuts with some kind of spice on them. It's sweet until you swallow and then BAM hot." Melusine shook her head, uninterested.

"That's what she said." Both Bull and Thom laughed at Sera's comment. "Oh, Bull, did you notice the redheads?" Sera's eyes were bright with both lust and mischief.

Bull popped the rest of the nuts in his mouth and nodded, "Yes. Dibs."

"What?" Sera shook her head, "There's over a dozen here."

"Still. Dibs."

They finally made it to the last entryway before the principal court area. Josephine stopped and turned to face the group, Vivienne and Leliana at her side. Josephine looked ready to have a stroke, whereas Leliana and Vivienne maintained the same poise as ever. Melusine had faith that they'd pull this off as well as they'd pulled off all the other crazy stunts they'd had to pull—including avalanche fighting an archdemon.

Vivienne took in their group in one glance and sighed, "Please try not to embarrass yourselves as much as I fear you will." She didn't wait for them, turning and walking through the gateway with an elegant glide only she could ascertain. Dorian rolled his eyes before mimicking the woman with his own sashaying walk.

Thom growled, stomping his way after them, "Can we just save the Empress and get back to where things make sense?"

Solas, Cullen, and Leliana accompanied the annoyed faux warden. Varric and Cassandra remained behind, both watching Sera and Bull prowl around the garden in search of more nuts, or redheads. It wasn't clear which it was at the moment.

"So, Josie, have you reminded these goofs of how imperative it is to be on our best behavior?" Melusine turned to stand beside Josephine.

"Yes," Josephine sighed, "for Bull and Sera, twice."

"Well, you know what they say," Melusine patted her friend on the shoulder, "third time's a charm."