Beta'd and edited by The Evil Within

Chapter 13: Play of the Game

Sometimes rank is a function of firepower.

-The Seventy Maxims of Maximally Effective Mercenaries

Nervously, Izuku patted his horse. "Easy there, boy. It's alright."

The horse snorted, shaking its head and shying slightly at the smell that was born on the wind. Izuku wrinkled his nose himself. The stench on the wind was unnatural, like that of an open tomb. The army that was coming towards them was barely worthy of the name. It was more a collection of monstrous insects and undead abominations that blighted and poisoned the land as they moved as a skittering tide of flesh. Izuku could see massive dung beetles over two stories tall, striding forward on dark carapace legs and leaving trails of decay, while overhead flew enormous rotting dragons on putrescent wings.

"This will be our end," Count Blois said, looking out at the approaching army, his face pale. "What madness is this? How can we hope to triumph against such odds?"

"Hey, don't worry about it, my babies and explosions will destroy them all!" Mei declared.

Blois swallowed, then nodded hesitantly back to her. "I fear I was overcome for a moment, Lady Hatsume. My apologies."

"They do look scary, but don't worry, Izuku is really strong!" Mei said. "He can punch all those bad guys super hard. Plus, I made him new babies with Aqua's help, so he's going to be extra tough!"

Blushing, Izuku looked down at his new armor yet again, fighting not to fidget as he was showcased. Aqua and Hatsume had worked together over the past week and a half to make a special set of what amounted to a flexible kevlar equivalent, alongside a titanium reinforced body suit, fitted with extra plating on the lower arms and hands, and thicker pieces along the shins and feet. These allowed Izuku to both move quickly and finally gave him a weapon that could keep up with him and the outrageous forces he subjected himself to.

Hopefully, at least. Aqua also said that it had some kind special properties, being blessed by two Goddesses (Megumin having blessed it as well, though that sort of worried Izuku as he thought it might explode if he hit something) and was now about equivalent to a Sacred Tool of the highest order. Or at least it was by Megumin's reckoning.

It also had special grooves fitted into the finger joints, so that Izuku could fire off blasts of air by flicking his fingers without breaking the gauntlet itself. Aqua's primary contribution was that it provided continuous healing to him, fixing minor wounds in seconds and repairing broken bones in minutes.

The only drawback Izuku could really notice was that injuries took longer to heal the farther from the central armor pieces they were. Megumin's addition seemed to be that when he punched something, there was a random chance of it triggering an explosive blast, though it was sometimes hard to tell if it was the gauntlets causing the explosion or simply the force Izuku was using. Izuku had also tried testing it, but finding a solid figure on just what the actual percent chance was eluded him.

"Obviously, it won't trigger if you're just punching a dummy!" Megumin had informed him after it had taken nearly an hour of Izuku beating on a training mannequin to get a single blast. "It only works when it's appropriately dramatic! You also need to shout out something cool. Not just 'smash' or whatever, but a real special technique name! Like, 'Fist of Justice!' or 'Exploding Fist Technique!' That's how Crimson Demon Magic works!"

"Okay...I'll test that out now then," Izuku muttered, looking down at his gauntlet and flexing it into a tight fist.

"Not just yet!"

Izuku turned to see a grinning Megumin leading forward a line of mages dressed in dark robes, wearing what looked like painted oni masks.

"It's time to show you what my Crimson Demons can do!" the erratic proto-goddess bragged. "Now, begin the sacred chant!"

The mages joined hands, and began to skip forward, singing in a cheery tone, "Bakuretsu, bakuretsu la la la! Bakuretsu, bakuretsu la la la!"

"Oh my God," Izuku groaned, rubbing the bridge of his nose. "You can't be serious."

He felt a tug on his leg to see a grinning Mei looking up at him. "Come on! Let's sing too!"

Feeling foolish now, Izuku climbed down off his horse, and took Mei's hand. They began to skip forward in time to the beat, Mei cheerily singing the nonsense lyrics, which was just explosions repeated over and over again. After a moment, the absurdity of the situation made Izuku laugh, and he started singing along, just enjoying being with Mei.

And then, the explosions actually started. A pair of mages would skip forward, raising their hands skyward and chanting in time with the song as the rest skipped around them.

"My soul is crimson, my will is that of a demon! I cry out to the void, and the void answers! Now, come forth my power, by the will of the Goddess, Megumin, Mistress of Destruction! Explosion!"

And then a detonation would strike the line of horrors moving towards then, creating smoking craters and two growing mushroom clouds. The pair of mages would collapse then, sighing in ecstasy, and the group would move forward, a new pair of mages making up an equally insane spell as attendants moved in to help those that had used their spell.

Despite how silly the ritual felt to Izuku, the results were undeniable: the enemy force was rapidly being reduced to smoldering ash, and the morale of the army was growing by the moment. In fact, many of the soldiers picked up the song, much to Izuku's chagrin.

Then, a pair of skeletal dragons broke away, diving for the mages and roaring in bloodcurdling anger.

"Ha! My turn!" Mei cackled, drawing her crossbow. "You get the one on the right, Izuku!"

"On it!" Izuku agreed, leaping into the air. The dragon bellowed, opening its diseased jaws wide as if to swallow the jumping hero.

"AIR JET BLAST!" Izuku cried, flicking both his middle fingers at the dragon when it was only 10 meters away. That, of course, triggered a massive burst of air, along with twin jets of explosions. The wind slammed into the dragon, knocking it from askey in the air. Izuku then kicked his legs, generating another gust of air, and shot through the air off the resulting shockwave. Izuku's gauntlet found itself solidly lodged in the rotten dragon's skull, and together they immediately began to plummet to earth. The dragon tried to free itself, but Izuku swung his other fist, impaling it in bone as well. With a sickening crack, the dragon impacted the surface, sending Izuku flying. Whatever magic was holding it together faded, reducing it to nothing but another jumble of bones and rotting flesh.

Groaning, Izuku stood as the suit's magic healed him. He looked over to where Mei was, and watched as she fired a steady stream of bolts at her own dragon. Each of them had been outfitted with explosives, and the dragon roared in pain as its bones shattered under their impacts. Mei aimed for the wings, Zoom allowing her to see exactly where its remaining tendons connected for maximum effect, sending the maddened beast spiraling down to the ground. Mei loaded another rack of explosives bolts and blew it to pieces.

"MY BABIES ARE THE CUTEST!" Mei hooted, slapping in another rack and cocking her crossbow. "Good job, Izuku!"

"Yeah, you too! Look out, here come more!"

This time, half a dozen dragons swooped down at them, coming at them from the flanks as monster bugs rushed down the center.

Izuku jumped into the air, then slammed his open palms together. "SMASH!"

A shockwave of compressed force shot forward a blade of air from his impact, cutting directly through the frail flesh of one dragon, and sent the two others tumbling to the ground, disoriented. Izuku turned to try again on his left, but Mei had already finished emptying her bolt rack into one dragon, then chanted, "2 Al + Fe2O3 - 2Fe + Al2O3 + 850 kJ/mol!"

As the words were spoken, the last dragon didn't even have time to roar in pain, simply disintegrating in a ball of flame. Mei fell back onto the ground, giggling madly. The remaining mages were thankfully able to cover her prone form, handling the line of bugs as explosions blasting their lines and reducing them to smoking hunks of ichor and carapace. Cavalry troops moved in, trampling the remaining stragglers. Despite the destruction though, the land still wriggled and squirmed with thousands or perhaps millions of insects more, and Izuku could still see hundreds of undead shambling forward, from undead rats to cows to a disturbing number of shambling humans.

Izuku hurried over to check on Mei, but she seemed fine, if totally drained of energy for the moment. He helped her back to the clerics for treatment. After making sure she would be cared for, Izuku turned to see Aqua glaring out at the encroaching blight, her staff held in a white knuckled grip and an angry snarl on her normally mischievous face.

"What's the matter?" Izuku asked, moving to stand beside the usually easy going goddess.

"This is wrong. Something is corrupting the life essense of this world. I can sense it. A powerful magical artifact, like one of the Sacred Relics we give to Adventurers. But twisted somehow. I'm going to have to purify it, or it will keep summoning more unlife and insects to it," Aqua said, looking serious for once in her life.

Izuku frowned, nodding slowly. "Ok. How do we do that?"

Aqua grimaced. "I'm going to have to get to the center of that. I can keep off the undead myself, but the insects and crawlies, ugh, I can't do much about those. I can purify the land but that won't just kill them."

"Right. I'll take you then. Hop on," Izuku told Aqua, gesturing to his back.

She gave him a wary look. "You just want to feel my boobs, don't you?"

Izuku took a deep breath, trying to contain his frustration. He barely succeeded. "Look, this is a battle. People are going to die if we don't fight. Countless people HAVE died. And honestly, if I wanted boobs, all I'd have to do is ask Mei. I'm pretty sure she'd let me feel hers. No offense, Aqua, but you're really not all that appealing to me."

"What, am I not pretty enough for you?!" Aqua demanded. "I am a literal goddess! My measurements are perfect, calculated to be-"

"Because you're a spoiled brat who reacts like this in the middle of a life or death situation," Izuku said bluntly. "Mei might not be as perfect as you, but she's real, and she likes me, and she's smart, and brave, and really pretty. And I'm honestly offended you think I'd cheat on her in the middle of a crisis."

Aqua blinked at Izuku, then cocked her head to one side. "Huh."

"You...you're talking this surprisingly well," Izuku said, suddenly feeling unsure about what to do. He'd half expected Aqua to explode, and the other half had expected her to cry and pout.

"You just reminded me of someone. That's all. OK. Let's do this. I think I can trust you, Midoriya. You're not Kazuma, but I still think we can be friends."

"Right. Let's warn the king and the others first." Izuku said. He hurried over to where the king was sitting on his horse, surrounded with his mages and generals, Aqua following right behind him.

"Lord Midoriya," the king hailed, nodding to Izuku. "The battle goes well, for now. Still, I am worried. We are running out of mages, and though their magic is beyond anything I have ever seen, I fear it will not last for long enough to break this foe. My men are brave, but those beasts have slaughtered every man that has tried to face them, save you."

"We're going to try to find whatever it is that's guiding those things," Izuku told Blois. "I'm going to jump into the middle of it with Aqua. She says that there is a magical object of some kind summoning and controlling them. If we destroy it, we can end this. It's a risk, I know, but we have to take it."

"You would leap into the very heart of that swarm?" King Charles asked, shocked at the very idea. He shook his head. "You are a brave man, Wolfsbane. But, I thank you. I would offer to go myself, but I fear that though I bear our most powerful relics, I would be of little use to you."

"Yeah, I'm sorry as well, but...I saw what happened to Blois and his knights when we fought the Wolf Queen. Your soldiers are brave, but this is beyond them. At least for the moment. Don't worry, I'll stand, One For All, against this darkness. Everything will be okay. Because we are here." Izuku said, smiling up at the king. "We'll handle this."

"Wait, one more thing," Aqua said. "We need Megumin."

Izuku hesitated, then nodded in agreement. Megumin was strange, but her spell was even more powerful than what he could do at the moment, even if he ruined his body. Having backup wasn't a bad plan.

"A powerful relic? Of course, I'll help Aqua. Don't worry, my Explosion magic will crush whatever comes at us!" Megumin promised. She frowned at Izuku. "How do we get there though?"

"I'll be jumping into the middle of the swarm. While you and Aqua deal with the relic, I'll fight whatever tries to attack us."

"Very well. I shall call down dark power, to smite our foes!"

"That...that's crazy," Izuku muttered. "But I guess you're both goddesses, so it's accurate. Right. Aqua, you climb on my back, Megumin, I'll carry you. Let's do this."

Taking a deep breath, Izuku squatted, then took a running start before launching himself into the air. The ground beneath him was pulverized from the force of his takeoff, and horses bucked wildly alongside startled men from the sound that followed it. Izuku flew well over 100 meters into the air, the wind whipping past him. To propel himself, Izuku kicked at the air again, the force of his kicks enough to shoot him out over the field and into the center of the enemy army with minimal damage as he avoided frantic dragons, along with undead birds and bats that tried to pursue them. Then Aqua pointed her hand at them.

"Turn Undead!" The simple spell was enough to reduce the flying enemies to ash, though it didn't stop the few insects that rose up on thrumming wings to give chase. Izuku proved to be too fast for them to reach however, seeming to dash through the air with powerful gusts left in his wake that shredded the pursuing monsters.

"There!" Megumin called, pointing at a dark obelisk at the center of the swarm in a wagon pulled by undead horses. It was made of dark stone that seemed to draw in the light around it, broken only by veins filled with what looked like solid rot and corruption, as insects crawled out of its base in constant waves. "I see it!"

"How long do you need to prepare your spell?" Izuku asked as they fell downwards.

Megumin laughed. "That's my secret, Midoriya. I don't need to prepare anything. I'm always ready. Divine Explosion!"

Izuku had thought what he had seen the mages conjure earlier had been impressive, and what Mei had done amazing. This was coming from the kid who grew up with Katsuki Bakugo. The mages blasts had been fireballs that had looked like they were equal to about half a ton of TNT, while Mei's had easily been four or five times that.

This blast was so massive that it swallowed up a good chunk of the swarm which stretched for miles and miles in an instant. It was so huge that Izuku was caught in the blast, saved only by a shield of water Aqua conjured up that sheltered them from the impact. Later, Mei would inform Izuku that according to her calculations, the blast was equal to a kiloton nuclear detonation, though without the radioactive fallout (Mei having whipped up a geiger counter somehow to check after the battle).

Even with Aqua's shield though, the blast still tossed Izuku higher up into the air and spun him and the two girls about like a coin in the dryer. He managed to keep his head though, clutching tightly to the now limp Megumin and trying to correct his descent with well timed kicks. They landed at the center of the devastation, where nothing remained but a huge crater, and, worryingly, the obelisk. The fel device now cracked somewhat in half, but seemed to be mostly intact despite its decayed state.

"Perfect!" Aqua said, jumping off Izuku's back. "I'll handle this!" She ran over to the obelisk, putting her hand on it. "Purification! Purification! Ugh, this is nasty. I'll take a few minutes. Purification!"

"What did you think?" Megumin asked, clutching at Izuku's armor. "What rating would you give my explosion?"

"I don't know. That was...Megumin, that was the biggest explosion I have ever seen, and I know a guy named Katsuki Bakugo who literally sweats explosions," Izuku told her.

Megumin curled her lip. "Oh, so he gets to name himself Master Explosion Winner, does he? Well, you tell your friend that I'M the master of Explosion magic, you hear?"

"Sure," Izuku agreed, smiling. "It will be good to see Kaachan again. We have to have nearly won, right?"

"Foolish child. You have done nothing of the sort."

Izuku spun to see two women on the lip of the crater, both dressed in uniforms similar to those the Wolf Queen had worn. One was a blonde woman with dead eyes and a murderous grin, while the other was...off. Izuku couldn't put his finger on it. She looked like a cute girl with dark hair. but something about her was just wrong. Like looking at a distorted photo. Izuku quickly backed away, setting Megumin down by Aqua. "Aqua, get ready. Those two look like trouble."

Aqua looked up, frowning. "Who? Oh. Well, you can handle them, right?"

"Aqua, do they look familiar to you?" Megumin asked, struggling to sit up. "I think… I think we've seen them before. Maybe, when the Lord of the Tomb invaded Belzerg?"

"No, they weren't there," Aqua said dismissively. "Just let Izuku handle them, I need to finish this."

"We have never met before," the small dark haired one said in a voice that made Izuku's skin crawl. Her lips didn't move as she spoke, and the words didn't sound as though they came from a human throat. "If we had, we would have slain you for the glory of our Master."

"We weren't supposed to fight you," the blonde said, licking her lips as they started down into the crater. "But the wizard has used her one spell for the day, and Aqua cannot hope to fight us. We shall slay you both, and inform our Master that at last, our mission has succeeded!"

Something about who the two women were behaving felt off to Izuku. They had to have seen him fighting before, and yet, they were confidently strolling forward. That alone urged caution. Raising his hand, Izuku fired off a blast of wind, the recoil kicking up dust and cinders.

The effect the blast had on the approaching pair was drastic: the smaller one seemed to fly apart, her body unfolding as she sprawled on the ground. As for the blonde, she rippled, her body acting as if it were made of jello. Then she snapped back into shape, as if nothing had happened, only the tears and wrinkles on the fabric of her clothing showing any sign an attack had hit her.

"What the heck?!" Izuku gasped, taking half a step back.

"Midoriya! Don't touch the blonde!" Megumin's voice suddenly cried. "She's a slime! If you touch her, she'll just absorb you! Physical attacks have no effect!"

"Oh ho, so you recognize what I am, do you?" the maid chuckled, her mouth spreading wide in a hideous grin. "We waited until you'd expended your spell, Megumin. Your Explosion magic could kill me outright, but you have nothing else that could possibly affect me! Not even that boy's wind can touch me, for it is merely physical air and not wind magic!"

"You forgot about me!" Aqua cried, pointing at the slime. "Sacred Purification!"

The light surrounded the woman and engulfed her, but when it faded she only tittered. "Oops? I'm not a poison slime, you know. I'm a predator slime."

"Shall we kill them now, Epsilon?"

Izuku's gut clenched and his skin seemed to crawl as the body of the smaller girl rose up on four black legs, a long centipede body extending behind it. Her "face" was now hanging down towards the ground, but that only revealed the many-eyed spider-like true head.

"Indeed, Zeta. Enough games. And I'm hungry," the blond hissed.

That was when Megumin stood up, causing both of the foes to gasp and recoil. "Thank you for revealing your weakness. You see, I am now no ordinary Archwizard."

"This cannot be!" Epsilon gasped. "She used her spell! She can use it but once per day! There are no manatite or recovery potions in this realm, and that fool is still in Konigreich! General Emi and Gamma can not have failed, we would have heard something!"

"She must be bluffing," Zeta hissed. "Breath of Fly!"

A swarm of insects spewed forth from Zeta's mouth, and Izuku hastily grabbed Aqua and Megumin, jumping away to the lip of the crater.

"Megumin?" Aqua asked, sounding worried as Izuku set them down.

"Hmph," Megumin said, raising her staff. "You should never underestimate a Crimson Demon."

"Kill them, kill them now!" Epsilon raged as she dashed towards them. "Summon more insects! We have to kill them before-"

Megumin smirked. "Explosion."

The fireball this time was much less impressive, leaving a smaller crater at the center of the other, but it was still larger than anything Mei or the mages mustered by an order of magnitude. Afterward, Mei would compare the crater size and blast radius to at least ten tons of TNT in yield, and Izuku had to brace himself to shelter both Aqua and Megumin as the shock wave enveloped them. He grunted in pain, but managed to hold firm thanks to his armor. When the dust and smoke finally settled, there was nothing left of either Epsilon or Zeta.

"Hmph. I never liked those two anyway," Aqua sniffed. "Good riddance! Now if only we can do that to the rest of the Lord of the Tombs minions." She slid down into the crater, jogging across it to the still relatively unscathed obelisk.

"Um, excuse me," Megumin said, tugging Iuzku's pants leg. He looked down to see her flopped on the ground. "I am afraid I will have to ask you to carry me again, please. That time, I used my own mana reserves as I was somewhat low on prayers and offerings. That Divine Explosion used a lot, and I wanted to save some for my followers."

"Um, yeah," Izuku agreed, picking Megumin up, and then hurrying back down into the crater to follow Aqua. "Thanks. You really think that slime was so dangerous?"

"They really are immune to most physical attacks," Megumin told him. "You might have been able to hurt her eventually, but if she touched you she'd have dissolved and eaten you. Predator slimes digest their food live, so it would not have been pleasant."

"Probably not," Izuku agreed. He ended up having to fight off a few more giant insects and skeletal dragons that attacked while Aqua purified the evil obelisk, but that wasn't too difficult. Once the obelisk finally crumbled to dust under Aqua's purifying spells, the magic animating the undead faded. Even the insects began to burrow underground or feast upon the carrion, apparently now unconcerned with anything beyond basic survival.

"A miraculous victory," King Charles praised them as they returned to the war camp. "Beyond miraculous. Foes such as that should have wiped out my entire army, to say nothing of my kingdom. And yet, we have barely a dozen dead, and a few hundred wounded, most of them mages suffering from exhaustion. And Lady Aqua says she can raise all our dead. For now, our lands are safe, and we can lick our wounds. This is a victory beyond my wildest hopes."

"That slime girl said something though," Izuku mentioned. "Something about a place called Konigreich? It sounded like they were under attack too."

The king shifted uneasily in his seat, an ornately carved wooden throne set up under a pavilion. "Konigreich is the land this foul army came from. They are our traditional rivals. They sent word they were beset with foes, and we were negotiating to send aid, but with such troubles within our own borders we had to redirect our efforts lest we too be overwhelmed."

"The last word we had was that the Kaiser had gone out with his army to face the foe in the field," Count Blois reported. "If it were a tenth the strength of this one, I find it unlikely they prevailed."

"If Konigreich falls, they will come here next. We would be wise to prepare for such an event," the King said.

"No!" Izuku cried, shaking his head and raising his fist. "I came here to save the whole world! If Konigreich is in trouble, we have to try to help them! The Lord of the Tomb is a danger to everyone! Not just one land, but all of them!"

"He's right, it would be pretty dumb to let all those people just die. That would just give the Lord of the Tomb more fodder for zombies. Or something stupid, like, I dunno, Super Zombie." Aqua agreed.

The King considered that for a long while, then sighed and nodded. "You are, unfortunately, correct. I cannot send my entire force to a foreign land however: there are still monsters that are about, and our forces are wearied already from these unending conflicts, to say nothing of trying to finance such a large trip. I can, however, deploy a contingent of a few hundred knights and mages to ride to Hauptstadt. You will be in command, Lord Midoriya."

"Me!?" Izuku gasped, startled and turning pale at the mere suggestion. "But I'm-"

"The hero who just slew half a dozen dragons with his bare hands, carries with him the blessing of two goddesses, one of Life and the other Destruction, and is now the most respected man in this kingdom," King Charles told him. "Do not fret. I shall send Marquess Blois with you to provide wise counsel for you."

"Your Grace?" Blois gasped, jerking himself.

The king smiled. "You have done your king and people a great service, Marquess. Do not think I have not noticed. Consider this your first test to see if you are worthy of your new titles."

"I shall not fail," Blois promised, bowing. He grinned proudly, slapping Izuku on the shoulder. "Come, Wolfsbane! We have much to prepare for before we set out upon the morrow."

Authors Note:

Play of the game: MEGUMIN AS MEMEWIZARD

EliminatedSolution_Epsilon (100) and Entoma_Zeta (95)

They rode Megumin's (Explosion) all the way to hell! Team Kill!

On a more serious note, thank you so much to the reader who made this humble story a TV tropes page. I thought that was pretty cool when someone told me about it.