Chapter 38: Must Protecc
"I've only known Eri for five minutes, but if anything where to happen to her I would kill everyone else in the room, and then Kazuma."
-Aqua on her newest follower.
"Kazuma, Kazuma!"
Stifling a groan, Kazuma sat up in bed. "Yeah, that's my name," he yawned.
"Kazuma, Kazuma, open up! I need your help!" Aqua's muffled voice demanded.
Next to him, Megumin moaned and covered her head with a pillow. "It's 1 o'clock in the morning. What can she possibly want right now?"
"Maybe she's just had her first period," Kazuma joked. Then he froze. "Um, if she is-"
With a snarl Megumin got out of bed and stalked to the door, throwing on one of Kazuma's shirts. She slammed the door open and glared out at Aqua, who was looking frantic. "What? Did you start bleeding? Down there?"
"What? No! I need help! One of my followers is in trouble!" Aqua pleaded. She looked rather distraught, her hair a messy halo around her head, and her blue eyes shining with tears. It would have been more worrying if Aqua hadn't spent a good portion of her day a week ago crying because Kazuma had borrowed and then broken her favorite pencil.
Behind Aqua, Darkness opened her own door. She was dressed in a nightgown and holding her sword. "What is it?"
"Aqua says one of her followers is in trouble," Kazuma sighed. "Just go back to sleep."
"Oh. Well, I shall not interfere in the affairs of the Axis Church," Darkness agreed, and closed her door after dismissing her sword.
"You have to help!" Aqua begged, grabbing Kazuma's arm even before he finished putting on his pants. "She needs me!"
"Who needs you, Aqua?" Kazuma asked, pulling on his shoes and trying not to be too irritated with her. He understood night terrors and early morning fear all too well.
"Eri does! She's hurt, and scared, and lonely!" Aqua babbled, frantically hopping about as she tugged on her jacket. "And I have to help her! She prayed to me and gave me offerings and everything!"
Kazuma looked at Megumin, who made a face and went back to their bedroom. "I'm out. It's too late for this. Or too early."
"Gee thanks," Kazuma muttered. "Right, so, what do you want me to do about it, Aqua? Some little girl got sent to bed with no supper and prayed to you. Big whoop."
"You don't understand! She's hurt really badly! And she's really scared! She needs us!" Aqua pled.
"Well what do you want me to do about it? Sheesh. We should just call the police or one of those pro heroes or something," Kazuma muttered as he buckled on his belt then pulled on a shirt.
"Help her!" Aqua said, grabbing Kazuma's arm and dragging him towards the door. "She's trapped in a dungeon! We have to rescue her!"
"Uh huh," Kazuma said, allowing himself to be pulled along. "A dungeon. Aqua, there are no dungeons here."
"Well it's underground, I can sense it! And there's all sorts of scary people around Eri," Aqua frantically explained as they descended the stairs. "We have to go help her, now!"
"Help who?"
Kazuma stopped and turned to see Wiz peeking out of her shop's door. "What are you doing up so late, Wiz?"
"Um, I don't sleep," Wiz said, coming outside and closing the door behind her gently. "You know that."
Wincing, Kazuma nodded, wondering what else Wiz didn't do. "Oh. Right. Sorry."
Aqua glared at Wiz, her old animosity for the undead not forgotten. "We don't need your help, lich! This little girl is scared and hurt, she doesn't need help from a monster!"
Those words made Wiz jerk back, and her eyes glimmered with tears. "I… I'm sorry. But… but if I can help a little girl… I do remember what it was, to be human. I wish… I wish I could be so again."
"What? Your bargain with Eris?" Aqua demanded. She tapped her foot, frowning. "Well, OK. If you help save my follower, I promise to help Eris resurrect you."
"You mean it?" Wiz gasped. "I… I could be human again?"
"Well, not right away. It would take a lot of prayers and offerings and Eris would have to actually become a goddess again. The ritual of True Resurrection can't be done by just one goddess," Aqua explained. "Come on, they said they'll meet us."
"Who will meet us?" Kazuma asked as they walked out to the street. He still wasn't really sure what was going on, or what Aqua was planning.
"Duh, my champions," Aqua explained, pointing out into the night.
Kazuma looked up in time to see two shapes, one green, one yellow, blur through the dark sky and come to a landing in the street just outside the apartment building.
"We came as soon as we could," Midoriya panted, standing and looking around worriedly. "Aqua, what's wrong?"
"One of my followers, Eri, is in big trouble! She's hurt and needs my help! Please, you both have to help me rescue her!" Aqua pleaded, taking the hand of the large hero and gazing up into his eyes. "You'll do it, right All Might?"
"What? Aqua, the message you sent to me said someone was in grave danger. I thought there was an attack on the students here," All Might rumbled. Kazuma swallowed and had to force himself to stand firm. In the darkness, All Might's eyes seemed to have an eerie sinister blue glow, and his face looked like it was carved from granite. When had their teacher gotten so scary?
"She is in grave danger! She's a little girl and they're hurting her!" Aqua wailed. "She gets hurt everyday and her own father hurts her and she's really scared of him! Please, you have to rescue her, she's trapped in a dungeon!"
All Might and Midoriya exchanged looks. The green haired boy sighed. "This really sounds like more of a job for the police if it's a domestic issue…"
"No! She's MY follower! She gave me prayers and offerings, and asked for my help! So I summoned my champions to help her! Kazuma, Midoriya, and All Might! Oh, and Wiz too, I guess."
"Look, she's not going to shut up about it until we help her. Come on, how hard can it be. We go find the little girl, calm her down. If it's bad, we call the police," Kazuma said with a shrug. "You're a Pro Hero, that makes you law enforcement or whatever, right All Might? You deal with the stuff all the time."
"Well, no, Heroes don't have the same duties as police, you would know that if you paid attention in the civics classes you're taking," All Might said. But then he sighed. "But I'd be lying if I said I was willing to turn my back on a little girl. Very well. We'll investigate. Where is she?"
"This way!" Aqua cried, and took off down the street at a top speed.
Kazuma caught up to her, but after a minute both of them were breathing hard and flushed. Midoriya, damn him, looked like he had barely broken a sweat, and All Might and Wiz of course were fine. Wiz because she was undead and had limitless stamina, and All Might because he was a freak like Midoriya.
"I'll give you a ride Aqua, here," Midoriya said, and scooped Aqua up onto his back.
"Here, Kazuma, I can help you as well," All Might said. "And you too, Miss Wiz. I can move much faster."
"Hey don't just pick me up like a bag of rice!" Kazuma complained, but All Might scooped Kazuma up in one arm, Wiz in the other.
"Oh! Um, thank you," Wiz said, blushing as All Might tucked her close to his body and ran after Midoriya and Aqua.
"Miss Wiz! You are quite cold. Are you well?" All Might asked.
"Um, yes. I'm a lich, remember?" Wiz said, glancing away from All Might. "I… I'm not alive. Not really."
"Plus, she's the Ice Witch. She can make anyone chill out," Kazuma quipped.
"Ah, I see. Forgive me. I forget you are not simply a normal young woman," All Might said, not even breathing hard as he ran faster than the cars on the street.
"She's older than both of us, and I'm over 200, pal," Kazuma muttered, folding his arms.
"I am 20!" Wiz snapped, turning to glare at Kazuma. "I am still a perfectly normal age for a woman to be single! I died when I was 20, so I shall remain 20!"
"She's been 20 for centuries," Kazuma sniggered.
"One does not argue with a lady about their age, Young Kazuma," All Might said sternly.
"Did you not listen!?" Kazuma demanded, glaring at All Might. "I'm way older than you! You should be calling me elder or something, be more respectful!"
"Two hundred years, and you haven't changed at all," Wiz sighed. "I'd have thought you'd manage to grow up a little, Kazuma."
"Well at least I'm not a virgin NEET anymore," Kazuma grumbled. "Unlike some of us."
"Kazuma! That's a terrible thing to say!" Wiz gasped. "Besides, you don't know-"
"I totally do. Miss Never-Been-Laid," Kazuma said, sticking his tongue out at Wiz.
"And you wonder why I call you Young Kazuma," All Might sighed. Then he suddenly grew serious. "Oh no. Aqua's not taking us where I think she is…Young Midoriya! Stop!"
They pulled up at a street corner, and All Might set down Kazuma and Wiz, then moved forward to peer around it. "Aqua, is this Eri in that building there, at the end of the street? The one with a wall around it?"
"No, she's under the building! I told you, she's in a dungeon!" Aqua snapped. She pointed to a large, ornate manor house in the traditional japanese style, with a tall stone wall around it. There were several men in cheap suits loitering around the entrance, talking quietly or smoking near the entrance. Several expensive cars could be seen behind the gate, and there were security cameras everywhere.
"Damnation," All Might growled. "I know that place. That's the headquarters of the Shie Hassaikai. Yakuza. This may be more serious than I thought."
"Yakuza!?" Kazuma gasped, jerking back and trying to hide behind All MIght. "Oh shit, those guys are still around? And they have superpowers?! I do not want to mess with superpowered yakuza."
"That's where Eri is," Aqua growled, trembling and leaning towards the yakuza headquarters, her lips curled back in a growl. "I can sense it."
"What do we do?" Midoriya asked, looking to All Might. "We can't just barge in. We don't have a warrant."
"That won't be an issue, I can call and get one immediately," All Might muttered, rubbing his chin. "But this child is really in danger, you say, Aqua?"
"She's hurt really bad," Aqua said, shivering and rubbing her arms. "They hurt her all the time with machines. She's all covered in bandages. And she's scared. Really scared. Especially of the one she calls daddy, but he's not her real dad. And she misses her mom."
"Then we go in and get her," Wiz snarled, her normally brown eyes glowing with an icy blue light. Frost suddenly coated the ground, and Kazuma found his breath misting in the air before him, despite it being a warm May night. "They're hurting a little girl? I'll tear them apart myself!"
"Miss Wiz, wait," All Might said quietly, putting his hand on Wiz's arm. She jerked around, her lips peeled back in snarl, but the big man didn't flinch. "I know it's tempting to just rush in. But if Eri's underground, we have no idea where she is. We have to locate her before we simply rush in."
"I mean, I could find her."
Everyone turned to look at Kazuma, and he mentally started to kick himself. Why did he have to open his big, stupid mouth? Oh well, no going back now.
"I could stealth in, take a look around. I can pick locks and stuff, that's not a problem. I can even get a hold of you guys and give you directions," Kazuma said with a shrug.
"What? When did you learn a magic spell that can contact us?" Aqua asked curiously.
Kazuam gave her an incredulous look, and held up his cell phone. "How'd you contact Midoriya and All Might?"
"I spoke to them in their dreams, duh," Aqua said with a shrug. "I can't figure out how to use one of those things except to play games."
"Because it's way easier to speak to someone in their dreams than it is to just, you know, send them a text message," Kazuma sighed. He felt a migraine coming on when Aqua smiled and nodded as if that were the most natural thing in the world. "Right. Well, unless someone has a better plan, I'll just sneak in there and find the kid. Who knows, maybe I can just hustle her back out too."
"That might be for the best," All Might agreed. "The yakuza can be deadly dangerous, and having a child mixed up in all this would be sheerest folly. But if you run into trouble, call for us and we shall come."
"Yeah, well, if you hear someone scream like a little girl, either Eri or I need help," Kazuma said. "Lurk."
It was pretty easy for Kazuma to sneak past the goons that were obviously on guard. The hard part was finding the secret stairs. Well, it would have been hard if someone hadn't opened them up just as Kazuma was sneaking by. He dodged past the guy and down the stairs, a grin on his face. Luck really was the best stat.
Once he was down below, he had to admit the place really did look like a dungeon, with endless metal corridors and few decorations, lit by the harsh fluorescent bulbs overhead. Instead of trying to figure out where to go, Kazuma just picked a direction and started to wander about, letting his Luck guide the way. He randomly opened a few doors, and pilfered the contents of the rooms while he was at it. What was the point of a dungeon crawl if you didn't take a few valuables along the way? He found some cash and jewelry, and sniggered to himself as he stuffed it in his pockets. Seemed like this wasn't a waste of time after all.
The fifth room was dark, containing a bed and some furniture. However, it was decorated with some wall paper and had a few toys on the dressers. It wasn't hard to figure out that the little girl sleeping on the bed, huddled under a blanket with an Aqua nendoroid clutched in her little arms had to be Eri.
Kazuma whipped out his cell phone, only to sigh and put it back away. No service underground. Great. Well, that left option two. He deactivated Lurk, and walked up to the bed.
"Hey. Psst. Kid. Wake up."
Eri's eyes fluttered open, and she jerked back at seeing Kazuma standing over her. "W-who are you? Did daddy send you? I don't want to go back, please!"
"Nah, I'm an angel," Kazuma said with a sly grin. "Aqua sent me to come get you."
Eri blinked, looking confused, but also hopeful. "R-really? I thought an angel would be prettier, and smell better…"
"Hey, look, I'm all the angel you're getting. So you want out of here or not? 'Cause I'm only up for working ONE miracle tonight," Kazuma said, glaring at the little girl.
"But what about daddy?" Eri whispered, wrapping herself in her blanket as if to hide. "He's scary…"
"Yeah, well, I beat up demons and devils in my spare time when I'm not busy running errands for Aqua, so he won't be a problem," Kazuma chuckled. He held out his hand. "Come on, whaddaya say, kid?"
To Kazuma's surprise, the girl shied away from his hand and ducked under her blankets, replying in a muffled voice, "I can't touch you. If I do, I could disappear you. Like daddy."
"Huh? What are you talking about? You're just a kid. I mean, a kid with a weird horn, but everyone's like that here. No sweat. I'm tough, I can take it," Kazuma bragged. "Come on, I'll take you back to your mom or whatever."
"Y-you mean it? You're really an angel here to take me back to mommy?" Eri asked, slowly lowering her blankets from her head.
"Eh, maybe not your original mom, but we'll hook you up. Or you can just hang out with Aqua and me," Kazuma offered.
"I don't know. How do I know that you're really an angel?" Eri demanded.
Frowning, Kazuma looked down at the kid. She really did look like hell. Her eyes were lined with dark circles that no kid had any business having, and from what he could see her arms were wrapped with bandages. What the hell. Someone was going to pay. "Cause I can do this. Lesser Heal."
As soon as Kazuma touched Eri and healed her, she gasped, shuddering slightly. "I… I feel better! Oh wow, you really are an angel, mister!"
"Call me big brother. I've always wanted a little sister," Kazuma sniffed. "Especially since Iris grew up. Sheesh. You gotta promise me not to date any jerks, alright Eri?"
"Um, yes, big brother," Eri promised.
Kazuma grinned and picked her up. "Well, then let's just get you out of here. Gonna be smooth sailing. Trust me, I'm pretty lucky."
"Oh really?" a new voice growled. Kazuma turned to see a man with a long, beaked mask entere the room, his eyes burning with fury. "Well, I suppose you are. After all, bad luck is still luck."
Eri suddenly whimpered and tried to wiggle out of Kazuma's arms. "Daddy, no!"
The masked man shut the door behind him, growling as he removed the gloves from his hands. "Drop her, boy! She's more important than you know! How did you get in here!"
"Um, food delivery?" Kazuma offered. "Create rations!" he held out a steaming bread roll. "Hungry?"
Instead of answering, the masked man snarled and slashed his hand at Kazuma.
"Whoa!" Kazuma dodged to the side, then held out his free hand. "Create Earth! Gust!"
"Gah!" Beaky cried, blinded, and lunged at where Kazuma had been.
He didn't stick around though, tucking Eri under his arm and bolting. "Crap crap crap crap!"
"Get back here!" Beaky snarled, slamming open the door, looking around blindly. "I'll kill you!"
"Eri, stay quiet. Lurk!" Kazuma said. He fled down a hallway, praying his Stealth held up. "Don't worry, Big Brother's gonna keep you safe. Until the cavalry arrives, that is."
Eri only whimpered and nodded, clinging tightly to Kazuma's chest. And then the alarms started to sound.
"Oh shit," Kazuma sighed. "Hope they don't have anyone with a detection skill."
He fled through the maze of passages, but he couldn't seem to find an exit. Everywhere, goons in masks and suits were blocking him, fencing them in. He ended up sneaking into a room and hiding in a corner with Eri still clutching at him as the search continued. People stuck their head in and looked around, but Kazuma's Lurk held up. Still, it wouldn't last forever. His MP was draining slowly, and eventually they'd go over this room with a fine toothed comb and grab them.
"Big brother," Eri whispered. "Are we going to be OK?"
"Yeah, of course," Kazuma lied. "I'm here. How bad can it be?"
"Ok. I trust you. Even if you are a very smelly angel," Eri said, and cuddled up to him.
Kazuma stroked her back, gritting his teeth. He didn't want to have to fight his way out. But dammit, he'd become attached to the little munchkin in the five minutes he'd known her. She didn't seem to just be an NPC. She was his little sister. And he'd save her.
Somehow.