Rodin waves his free hand, and both God Speed and Witch Time simultaneously collapse, the backlash of the splintering magic washing over me like a sudden slap to the face. I stumble back slightly, as do Bayonetta and Jeanne, the latter clearly still feeling the shock wave despite not having personally been a part of that exchange.

Didn't know Rodin could do that...

As soon as she regains her balance, Bayonetta frowns and yanks her arm out of the bartender's grip.

"Far be it from me to complain, but I can't help but feel this is rather backwards." she notes. "It's obvious you didn't card her, but you do realize just who your latest patron happens to be, don't you?"

"No shit." Rodin deadpans. "She ain't the one nearly bustin' up my bar though. You got a lotta credit with me Bayonetta, but it ain't that high."

He jerks his thumb in the direction of the entrance.

"If you fools are gonna keep tryin' to bust a cap in her ass, you can take yo' own asses outside."

I exhale in relief.

"Thank you, Rodin. Nice to know that there's at least someone here who-"

"I ain't just talkin' to them." Rodin interrupts as he turns towards me. "If they can't cool it, I'm tossin' your ass out too. You ain't good for business."

...never mind, I take it back.

"You would defend her, knowing what she is?" Jeanne speaks up, obviously less familiar with Rodin than her fellow witch. "Her very existence is a cataclysmic threat to the entire human world!"

"Particularly myself, which I'm rather more concerned about at the moment." Bayonetta adds. "Though, saving the world in the process would be a rather lovely bonus."

"Except that the world doesn't actually need saving, because I'm not planning on destroying it to begin with!" I exasperatedly cut in. "Seriously, if you two would just sit down and listen to me for like five minutes, I could easily clarify several things you seem to be highly confused about! Chiefly me!"

Neither the sentiment I'm expressing nor the rising indignance in my voice does much to bring the pair of witches pause — though, it does cause Bayonetta's lips to quirk upwards in apparent humor.

"My, I think you might just be the most talkative angel I've met to date." she muses, dropping her free hand to her hip. "I suppose I shouldn't be surprised. Your kind does seem awfully inclined to enjoy the sound of their own voices."

She gives her weapon an idle twirl and smirks at me.

"Shame they're all such pompous prats that they're rarely worth listening to until they start screaming."

That, to both her surprise as well as my own, actually wrests a small laugh from me. I realize that was probably meant to be a threat, but... well, I can't say I entirely disagree.

"Can't relate to the screaming part, but sadly, you're not wrong about Paradiso containing a great many overly-sanctimonious jerks." I reply after a moment. "I too would prefer if more of my subjects learned how to talk without sounding like they're quoting aloud from the Book of Genesis half the time, so I think we can agree on that much, at least."

Bayonetta blinks.

"Hmm..." she hums again, her expression suddenly gaining a touch of curiosity. "I have to admit, you seem strikingly less full of yourself than I'd expected. Certainly less so than those so-called Virtues."

Jeanne looks over at Bayonetta with obvious shock.

"Cereza, no matter how she looks or what she says, this is still the woman who would remake the Trinity of Realities to Paradiso's own ends." she protests. "You can't seriously be thinking of letting her speak?"

"'Woman' seems like something of an overstatement from where I'm standing." Bayonetta replies, giving me another quick once over as she drags a finger across her jaw in thought. "And yes, I'm considering it."

Having apparently stumbled my way into an actual chance to explain my position, I hurriedly clamp my mouth shut, not wanting to accidentally say something to cause Bayonetta to change her mind. At the same time, the witch in question turns back towards Rodin, who's by now moved back behind the bar proper.

"Care to share your opinion on this?" she asks. "Shall we hear her out?"

Rodin shrugs.

"Ain't really up to me." he replies, the cigar from earlier back between his fingers. "If it were though, yeah, I'd say give her a shot. In case you couldn't tell, she ain't exactly what Paradiso's been sellin' as of late."

I don't know whether I should feel grateful or insulted to be described that way — though, I ultimately settle on the former as Bayonetta thinks it over for another brief moment, then shrugs herself.

"Alright."

Pillow Talk disappears as Bayonetta strolls past me and seats herself in the very same chair I abandoned a minute ago, crossing one leg over the other in the showiest manner I've ever seen as she does so.

"We'll play nice for the moment." she says. "Won't we Jeanne?"

Jeanne still looks less than convinced, but grudgingly follows Bayonetta's lead and stows Vritra away, though she declines to sit down as well. Meanwhile, Bayonetta retrieves the guns I snatched from the center of the table, reholstering Scarborough Fair while tossing the handheld half of All 4 One over her shoulder, which Jeanne effortlessly catches and holsters as well.

"Fine, go on then." Jeanne urges, determinedly keeping her distance from me. "Say your piece, Goddess."

She spits the word out like an insult, but I don't really care, as I'm just pleased that we finally seem to be getting somewhere. Doing my best to smile, I open my mouth-

"Do try to keep your hands to yourself though." Bayonetta suddenly adds. "I've no doubt you'd still love to reclaim your other eye, but I'm just not the kind of woman to find that type of persistence attractive."

My attempt at a smile fails as my expression reverts to a flat glare.

Intellectually, I realize that these two in fact have very legitimate reasons to neither like nor trust me. Emotionally however, this is really starting to get on my nerves.

"First of all, that's awfully presumptuous." I say, crossing my arms under my chest. "Second, you really think this is all about you, don't you?"

"I hardly see why I shouldn't, what with how those pesky angels of yours have been blathering on of late." Bayonetta replies. "I swear, everywhere I went in Vigrid it was Left Eye this, Left Eye that... it's really quite aggravating when people only seem to want me for my body."

Oh, like you don't egg them on every step of the way.

"Well believe it or not, Cereza, now that I'm awake I have better things to do than try and complete the set." I somewhat petulantly retort. "Frankly, I'm having more than enough problems with the Eye I already have, which you'd know if you made even a cursory attempt at listening to me earlier."

I expected better of her. Though, I suppose Bayonetta always has been more of a "Shoot first, ask questions later, if ever" kind of person, so perhaps that was my own fault for thinking this would be any different.

"Also, just to reiterate, I have NO intention of destroying, remaking, or otherwise screwing around with the Trinity of Realities." I state as emphatically as I can manage. "So you can go ahead and put that right out of mind."

"Can we now?" Bayonetta questions. "Funny, because the Lumen Sage who revived you seemed awfully interested in that... as was every angel I cast into Inferno on the way to him, for that matter."

I roll my eyes, pointedly ignoring her obvious attempt to get a rise out of me.

"Maybe it was in their interests, but it's certainly not in mine."

Jeanne scoffs. "As if we could possibly believe that coming from the ruler of Paradiso. The ultimate intentions of the angels have been known since before the dawn of recorded history, and reuniting the Trinity of Realities has always been their plan. Your plan."

...excuse me?

"What do you mean my plan?!" I snap, my hands planting themselves on my hips as I round on her.

My sudden vehemence brings Jeanne's pistols back to her hands in an instant, but before she can actually use them, ice suddenly sprouts from the inside of both gun barrels, rendering them at least temporarily unusable while chilling their metal enough to burn. Jeanne cries out in unexpected pain, dropping her weapons as quickly as if I'd set them on fire.

"Listen up." I order, my temper beginning to fray. "If you care to recall, I have been asleep for the last several millennia. As such, NOTHING the angels have been doing during that time has been my idea. Hell, I already had to tell a bunch of them off for just assuming I'd be on board with that very agenda!"

Jeanne says nothing, too busy gritting her teeth at me in anger, while Bayonetta merely raises an eyebrow in my direction.

"Really now?"

"Yes really now, as in basically the very second I showed up!" I nearly shout, this close to literally stamping my foot. "Seriously, I pop into Paradiso after nearly getting my face punched in by you, and I immediately have this entire angelic entourage whining at me to 'fix' reality so we can rule over everything 'as is right', and I'm just like-"

I throw my hands up.

"Why would we even WANT that?!"

Silence falls over the bar, even the record on Rodin's gramophone coming to an abrupt halt with what feels like absurdly perfect timing. From the way that everyone is suddenly staring at me, you'd think that I just announced my immediate intention to stroll down into the deepest part of Inferno and demand Queen Sheba's hand in marriage.

"...did I hear that correctly?" Jeanne finally asks, disbelief seeming to have momentarily overtaken her anger. "You're serious?"

"Of course I'm serious." I grumble. "As if it's even remotely in my interest to take on more responsibility than I already apparently have. Frankly, reality seems to have been doing just fine in my absence anyways, and I'm hardly inclined to step in where I'm clearly not wanted."

Jeanne continues staring at me, looking as though she can scarcely comprehend what she's hearing. Behind her, Rodin chuckles.

"You really have changed, ain't ya?"

I shrug. "I don't know, have I?"

...I mean, obviously I have, but I can hardly make the comparison myself.

"Well, this is certainly a lovely little yarn you're spinning for us." Bayonetta suddenly interrupts. "I must admit to a small concern, however."

She leans forward slightly, glasses glinting dangerously in the low light. "Honesty may be a virtue, but you angels have never been the best at practicing what you preach, and I'm not particularly fond of being taken for rides I didn't charter. Exactly what proof do you have of anything you've claimed thus far?"

"How about the fact that we're having this conversation at all?" I flatly reply. "If I had any actual interest in re-merging the Trinity of Realities, don't you think I'd have already done it?"

Or at least wouldn't currently be sitting in this bar, trying to reason with the least likely pair of women on the planet to believe that I'm telling them the truth?

"Not without your Left Eye you wouldn't have." Jeanne cuts back in, the accusatory tone returning to her voice. "Or rather, couldn't have. Isn't that right?"

I pinch the bridge of my nose. "Fine, you're correct that I don't actually have the power to do that at the moment, so I suppose I'll have to give you that one. However..."

I turn towards Jeanne, matching her glare with one of my own. "For the... what, third time now? I don't want the Left Eye! Nor the Right Eye for that matter! They aren't even mine to begin with!"

Jeanne opens her mouth, then closes it and blinks, seeming genuinely surprised.

"They're not?"

"No." I testily reply. "Far as I can tell, the angels just wanted to use them to metaphorically kick me out of bed. In actuality, the Eyes of the World originally came from Aesir, former God of Chaos..."

My gaze slides back towards the other witch present.

"...who, FYI, is also the guy whose evil half has been possessing Balder for the past 500-odd years."

It takes Bayonetta a moment to register that, but I can tell once she does, as her eyes noticeably widen behind her glasses. She starts to stand up-

"Before you ask, yes, that is why he went completely nuts." I preemptively state. "I suppose I'm actually somewhat thankful for that, or I'd probably still be sealed away right now, but the Witch Hunts would not have happened, or at least not have escalated as far as they did, if not for your daddy dearest getting corrupted by the essence of a literal god."

"Which is why I'm actually here, in case anyone forgot." I continue before I can be interrupted. "Because Balder is now sealed inside of me, so is the half of Aesir's spirit that was sealed in him, and as that means he's essentially entwined with his own Right Eye at the moment, I can't exactly trust that it isn't compromised. So I came here, hoping that he-" I gesture at Rodin, "-might know how to ensure I'm not going to get taken over from within by the deific equivalent of a parasite, and preferably how to remove said parasite from myself entirely... and then you two barged in."

A few locks of golden-blonde hair absently brush against the side of my face, prompting me to toss them back over my shoulder with an irritated flip of my hand.

"Starting to get the picture yet?"

"Hold on," Bayonetta says, "go back to that bit about the God of Chaos."

I groan. "Just research him yourself. My memories are so swiss-cheesed right now that I honestly don't know much more about him than I already told you."

A flash of puzzlement crosses Bayonetta's face at that, but I don't plan on expounding on the subject — I'll leave her to make her own conclusions.

"Back to the point, I am literally only here to talk to Rodin." I finish. "That's it. Are we clear?"

I give Jeanne a pointed look, to which she "hmmphs" at me and crosses her arms.

"Pretending for a moment that we believe any of this," Jeanne says, a touch less snidely than before, "why not just get rid of the Right Eye? From what you've claimed, you have no real desire for it anyways, so would that not be the obvious solution?"

I laugh humorlessly. "Oh, if only it were that simple. In fact, normally it might be — except, you know how my revival kind of got screwed up?"

"You mean the revival that would have involved my being sealed into you as well?" Bayonetta dryly replies. "You'll have to forgive me for not being particularly enthused with the idea."

"You're forgiven." I say with roughly equal sarcasm. "Because of that however, I am literally only operating on the power of the Right Eye at the moment. Thus, if I remove it, there's a strong possibility I'll just slip right back into oblivion due to lacking any other energy source to keep myself awake."

"And what's stoppin' you from fixin' that?"

I slowly turn towards Rodin.

"Um... the fact that forces strong enough to literally power a deity aren't exactly in high supply?" I reply after a moment, confusion coloring my words.

Rodin shrugs. "So go get your own."

"...go get my own." I dully repeat. "Did you not just hear- what do you mean go get my-"

I pause mid-sentence.

Wait a second. Is he suggesting that-

Could I-

I think I could.

No. I know I could.

I laugh aloud, suddenly in much better cheer.

"Alright, fair point!" I exclaim, smiling even as I press my palm into the center of my forehead. "Don't know why I didn't think of that myself..."

Seriously, way to make me feel stupid. If I'd just thought over the issue for a little bit longer, I probably could have avoided coming here entirely.

"Sorry for wasting your time Rodin." I continue, ignoring Jeanne as she loudly questions what the hell I'm on about. "I'll try not to do that again if I ever come back here."

Rodin nods.

"Just make sure to actually buy something next time." he grunts. "Ain't like you can't afford it."

I'm not really one for alcohol or firearms, but I suppose that's fair. In fact-

I extend my hand, and a tiny sliver of my power breaks away from me, swirling over the bar before rapidly crystallizing into a massive set of gem-encrusted golden hoops.

"Consider that a tip for your assistance, however silly I now feel for having needed it." I say before turning back to the witches, both of whom look rather baffled. "Regardless, I should really get started on this ASAP, so I suppose I'll go ahead and make myself scarce."

And, since my emergency exit plan turned out not to be necessary...

Might as well leave in style, right?

My halo abruptly uncloaks itself, already shining like a miniature star. At the same time, I rapidly begin rising off the floor, reclining backwards onto nothing at all as though lounging upon an invisible throne.

Bayonetta immediately springs from her seat, while Jeanne's hands become encased in the massive clawed gauntlets of Kali. Fire and lightning surge along their serrated nails, promising pain to anything they touch — that is, until I send a spike of angelic energy directly into the weapon, causing the gauntlets' elemental effects to sputter out as the demon within recoils.

"Calm down, I just said I was leaving, didn't I?" I ask as Jeanne speechlessly staggers back. "So jumpy..."

As I speak, a trio of impossibly intricate golden rings coalesce from the air around me. Encircling me like the wheels of an enormous gyroscope, they quickly begin rotating and orbiting around my person, each revolution coming faster and faster, until it looks more like I'm floating within a trio of sparkling ethereal spheres. Images of Paradiso shimmer into being upon their nonexistent surfaces, glimpses of surrealistic landscapes and fractal-like symbols surging into view before dispersing just as fast, forming an ever-moving, multilayered collage of the heavens themselves.

...mind, none of this is actually doing anything besides making this process look significantly cooler than it otherwise might, but I honestly kind of feel like that's a decently important function in and of itself.

"Wait!" Bayonetta cries, shielding her eyes from the light show in progress.

Whatever it is she wanted to say, it's too late. Smiling down at the pair of witches, I give them both a single jaunty wave.

IABES NOAN GI C
(See ya!)

The wings of my halo sweep downwards, and with a flash like lightning and a crack like thunder, I vanish.