I stand up straight away, rubbing my face and my eyes, trying to pull myself together feeling already guilty for this breakdown, for having given voice to those sentiments that, I know too well, I should pretend are not there.
I open the window and Leo hops gaily inside. There is a scroll from George tied on his leg.

"Here you go, make good use of him. Like, for example, to send Ron to hell. Just an idea. If you need more suggestions of where to send him, I've got plenty, you only need to ask.
George"

I smile between tears and avoiding purposefully Harry's gaze, I walk to the kitchen to write my letters.
After an hour I've got three scrolls in front of me. One for McGonagall, one for an English lawyer and one for Molly and Arthur. The last one has been very difficult to write, I know I'll give them a very big disappointment in a moment when they already are low, but they need to be informed as soon as possible, I want them to find it out through me first.
Harry watched me on my feverish activity from the threshold, not even once I looked up and not even for a second he stopped watching me.
'I'm determined' I say eventually putting down my quill and tying all the scrolls to Leo's leg whispering him instruction.
Harry bows his head, and he is gone.
I try to clear my mind to decide on my next step. First thing first I need to get my wand from the cottage and then, I have no choice, but I'll have to go to Rumania to make sure Hugo is ok and to organize what needs to be organized.
I hate the idea of leaving Harry alone, but I have no other option, I must get there as soon as possible. When I'll have the chance, I'll ask somebody to pop over here.
I go to the bathroom, and I wash my face with some cold water. I look determined but also very tired. I'm still wearing the same clothes as yesterday, they are all wrinkled as I slept in them, I try to smooth them as much as possible and with a brush I endeavour in taming my untameable hair with very little success. While doing these petty operations, I think about Harry in the next room. The crying helped me to dissipate the overwhelming emotions that gripped on me in the last few days, and I feel again myself.
My children are my priority right now. But Harry… And I sigh knowing that farewell is coming closer and closer.
He is sitting on the bed glancing emptily in front of him. He smiles faintly when he sees me as I sit beside him.
'I must go' I say.
'I know'
'I'll try to be back as soon as possible, but I don't know when'
He nods imperceptibly.
'Don't forget to eat while I'm gone'
I see he is trying to speak but it's swallowed by a gulp. He places his hand on mine and squeeze it.
I caress his unshaven and sunken face and I give him a kiss feeling a vice clenching my stomach. I don't know why but I feel like I'm saying goodbye for much a longer time than what I hope. If everything goes to plan, I would like to be back tonight and yet it's like I'm leaving him forever.
I stand up sliding my hand away from his, he follows me with his gaze still struggling to tell me something with little effect, but his eyes, that always conveyed their meaning better than words, can do it quite eloquently.
'I'll be back soon' I say trying to reassure those desperate eyes. And while I'm leaving slowly the room, trying not to look at him more than necessary not to falter in my proposition, he calls out for me.
I turn, keeping a firm grasp on the door frame to help me not to give in to that urge to run back to him.
'When you see the boys will you tell them that I love them and that I'm sorry?'
'Sorry for what?! Don't start again accusing yourself for something you have no fault of. And anyway, you will see them before me. I'm not going to Hogwarts' I say in reply thinking he gathered I'm going there to speak to Rose which I'm not, but he doesn't answer and goes on speaking.
'And you'll kiss Siry for me, will you?'
'I hope you will see her before me, I'm not going to the Burrow either, but when I'll see her, I'll certainly do'
He nods pensively. I'm about to utter a goodbye when he speaks again.
'Thank you for having been the best friend I've ever had'
I succeed in a watery smile 'My pleasure' I answer playfully.
He returns the smile and wave his hand 'Go now, I'll miss you very much'
I falter under this parting; he obviously feels the same way as I do about this farewell. I wonder why it feels that way, but I don't want him to be carried away by this misconception 'Harry, don't worry, I'm going to be back very soon. If I can, even tonight'
He nods with a half-smile 'I know you'll be back'
Why do I feel like this sentence is left uncompleted?