Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto or Toaru Kagaku no Railgun/Toaru Majutsu no Index
The Trinity of Tokiwadai
Chapter Forty Three: The Idiots of Academy City
Beta:
At one of Academy City's newest ice cream parlours sat Kuroko and her beloved Onee-sama. One that Uiharu, the legendary sweet tooth, had recommended. Kuroko had planned to bring her Onee-sama here for a special occasion, to have a good time and bring them closer. Potentially as a prelude to a night of some very special fun. Unfortunately, after the recent Level 5 fanfiction debacle and how upset it her left her precious Onee-sama, she had been forced to give up on that plan and had instead brought her love interest here to cheer her up.
"And then there were all those that paired me with that psycho [Meltdowner]!" Onee-sama ranted as she took a big scoop from her treat. "Those were just gross! Like I ever want to even touch that b-witch!"
Onee-sama kept going but Kuroko tuned out the words, too lost in the beautifully energetic way her roommate was expressing her displeasure. It was just so alluring. Getting to watch her like this made the whole incident worth it.
Even the part where she got dosed with Onee-sama's heavenly electric torture punishment for getting caught reading some of that wonerful- Correction, horrible fanfiction. It'd left her a little sore. That being another reason she'd chosen to visit the ice cream parlour. She needed a pick-me-up after all that writhing she'd done while being electrocuted by Onee-sama for the infraction.
"You're thinking some of that trash wasn't so bad, aren't you?" Onee-sama accused suddenly, dragging Kuroko out of her thoughts. Her empty spoon pointed at the twintail accusingly.
It hadn't quite been the direction her thoughts had taken but Kuroko knew she had to be honest.
"I did find some of them tasteful," the Teleporter admitted tentatively.
"Yeah right," the Level 5 snorted disbelievingly.
"It was," Kuroko insisted. "Some of the ones about Saten-san and Accelerator are loads better than the reality at least."
"Ugh! As much as I would like to, I can't disagree with that." Onee-sama said taking a big mouthful of her sundae. "But that's only because the two of them are too messed up for words."
"Can't really deny that." Kuroko agreed with a frown.
"Onee-sama, since you dislike the whole genre so much, maybe it would be a comfort to know that Namikaze-san is the one most often paired up."
"That's because this City is full of lolicons." Onee-sama snorted and took a harsher bite from her ice cream even as sparks danced along her perfect forehead in response to her irritation.
"Though your pairing with her is most popular. Now wasn't that a surprise. Then again it shouldn't have been. Onee-sama is amazing!"
"Don't remind me." Onee-sama said with a growl. "Change in topic! Any idea how come Sequenzia-san hasn't, I dunno, gone on a killing spree yet?"
That's hardly a different topic. Kuroko noted with a bemused smile. Onee-sama wants to talk about this more than she lets on.
"Uiharu told me Saten-san told her about it as part of her attempt to get back at Namikaze-san for getting her girls to call her Mama. Apparently, Sequenzia-san was just amused by the whole thing."
"Why isn't anyone reacting like they should!?"
"Maybe you're the one overreacting Onee-sama?"
"What?! I am not overreacting! At least the Chibi gets it!" Mikoto growled and stuffed more ice cream into her mouth, cheeks puffed out and tinged with the pink of a blush.
Kuroko just chuckled at her Onee-sam's embarrassment, which prompted the Level 5 to shovel ice cream into her mouth as a distraction from her feelings.
"Ah, Onee-sama, maybe you should pace-"
"Brain freeze! Ah, no, ugh, my head!"
"Before that happens." Kuroko said with an amused and exasperated sigh.
After her brain freeze subsided, Mikoto and Kuroko had finished off the rest of their treats before heading off for some window shopping in one of Academy City's underground malls.
They'd been browsing for a while and the [Railgun] had finally found something that caught her attention. Staring at a few nice looking sneakers in the display of a sports apparel store, she hummed thoughtfully before glancing between the school issue mary janes she was wearing and the window with a pondering look.
"Onee-sama," Kuroko said as she appeared by her side and tugged on her sleeve, pointing at the next store. "Look! Those dresses are simply fabulous!"
Glancing over at the feminine skater dresses that Kuroko was gesturing towards, Mikoto frowned. She wouldn't deny they looked cute, but with all those bows, frills and see through lace they were a little too fancy for her tastes. She was all for looking like a lady, but preferred keeping it simple.
"Not my taste," Mikoto told her roommate. "I think Namikaze would like them though. I think I've seen her modelling something similar in a magazine once or twice."
"Mm, I believe I remember that article. They should have her model more mature clothes. She pulls it off."
"Eh? With her childish body?" Mikoto asked with disbelief. "I'd say she looks like lolicon bait everytime she tries looking adult."
"Well, that is a main demographic of her fans." Kuroko reminded her.
"Just 'cos it is, doesn't mean it should be." Mikoto hissed angrily. "She deserves better than a bunch of sickos interested in a girl way too young for them."
"Hm," Kuroko gave her a sideways glance, "Onee-sama is very protective of Namikaze-san. Did something happen?"
"Of course I am! She's my kohai."
Kuroko used the heel of her shoe to draw circles on the ground, "Hmph, lucky her."
The Level 5 rolled her eyes at the jealous pout the twintailed girl was sporting.
"Don't be silly Kuroko," Mikoto told her with a chiding pat on the shoulder. "You're my kohai too. If you need it I'd totally stand up for you too."
"Eh? W-Well, of course!" Kuroko beamed, her cheeks pink and Mikoto could have sworn that hearts were fluttering off the Teleporter.
Geez, so easy to rile up. I think I need to give her a few more headpats. Mikoto smiled at the pacified underclassman.
"Mikoto-nee! Kuroko-nee!" A pair of angelic voices called out suddenly moments before a pair of golden blurs slammed into the Tokiwadai roommates.
"Febrie? Janie?" Mikoto asked, surprised at the twins' sudden appearance even as she returned the hug she was receiving from Febrie. "What are you two doing here?"
"We were shopping for some new clothes for the two of them," Nunotaba-san, the girls' nanny, said as she walked over laden by a number of bags.
"What did you get them?" Mikoto asked curiously.
"Dresses! Shinobu got us pretty dresses!" Janie said excitedly as she disentangled herself from Kuroko.
"They were all frilly and had bows and stuff." Febrie added as she too let go of her hug and started hopping on the spot with enthusiasm that equalled her twin's.
"So basically the same like they always wear?" Mikoto deadpanned.
"No, they weren't gop, gonth, um, Febrie, what's the word?" Janie asked in a low but still quite audible voice that she must've thought was a 'whisper'.
"'Gothic'," Febrie 'whispered' back to her twin. "That's what Mama called it."
The Tokiwadai students nodded absently at the twins before looking to their babysitter for confirmation.
"More or less." The older girl said with a long suffering sigh. Her eyes weren't as baggy now surprisingly, maybe she was easing into her babysitting role better. It definitely suited her more than supporting researcher in an immoral experiment.
"Well, as usual, you girls will look adorable in anything." Mikoto grinned as she poked Frebrie's nose.
"Indeed," Kuroko agreed. "You two are lovely angels which will make any clothes you wear into the finest fashions."
Mikoto was about to ask what colors the dresses were, but she was cut off just as she opened her mouth when a rapidly growing wall of ice appeared out of nowhere.
Instinctively, Mikoto made to leap back, her hand reaching for one of the twins. Sadly, the wall cut her off and all she earned for her troubles was getting her fingertips stung by the frigid cold ice. It was cold enough to have given her frostbite, fortunately the Electromaster had plenty of experience dealing with cold. Occasionally sparring with the [Elemental Empress] did that for a person and she reflexively sent a jolt of electricity down into her fingers to ward off the effects of the extreme temperature.
"What the hell?!" Mikoto snarled as she shook her fingers to make sure she still had feeling in them - they were suffering from some minor pins and needles, but were otherwise fine - as her eyes scanned around her for the attacker.
"Hiromi! Grab the pipsqueaks and go! I'll hold the [Railgun] off!" A short girl with long red hair, red eyes and freckles on her face shouted, just as a tall muscular young man with dark hair dressed in a long sleeved t-shirt and pants appeared on the other side of the nearly clear ice.
"Kuroko!" Mikoto ordered urgently even as the man picked up a confused Febrie and Janie before running off into the crowd.
"On it!" The Teleporter shouted confidently as she teleported after the kidnapper.
Mikoto meanwhile turned to face their attacker, only then noticing the armored suit she was wearing that attached to two attachments worn on the arms that looked like weapons of some kind and had a curved magazine worn on the back.
Standing just behind her was a tall high school girl with her black hair in a side tail and straight bangs, wearing glasses and dressed in her school uniform
"You two are idiots you know that?" Mikoto said, cracking her knuckles as electricity arced off her body, fury burning in her eyes at having her day interrupted by such imbeciles. "Kidnapping those twins? Do you have a death wish?"
"Big talk [Railgun]!" The redhead taunted. "Do you know how dangerous this weapon is? It was designed to beat Accelerator you know. Pretty radical right? I'm sure it's more than dangerous enough to take you out."
"Why don't you try it then?"
Even as the Level 5 confronted the two female assailants, Janie and Febrie found themselves being carried like sacks of potatoes as the lone male kidnapper pushed his way through the panicking crowds and into a shop.
Febrie twitched her head right in front of them suddenly, just as Kuroko-nee teleported into view where she was looking and blocked the way.
"Halt right there!" The Teleporter declared sternly. "As a member of Judgement, I command you to surrender and hand over those children!"
The mean old man ignored her - Which was rude! - and just kept running.
Her younger twin twitched again and Janie watched with satisfaction as the old man's leg suddenly had several nails lodged in them. Hm, from what Mama and Shinobu had taught her about anatomy, Kuroko-nee had hit his ligaments.
Ouchie.
The meanie face just gritted his teeth though, and amazingly kept running. Building up speed, he barreled into a surprised Kuroko-nee and knocked her into some shelves, causing her to gasp in pain even as he leapt over the store's cashier's counter.
"Ah! Kuroko-nee!" Febrie called out and Janie futilely started beating her tiny fitsts against their kidnapper. "He's got self biomanipulation! He's using it to ignore the pain and damage from your needles!"
"Let us go, you, you big jerkface!" Janie cried as she saw Kuroko-nee shakily get back to her feet. "You hurt Kuroko-nee! I hate you!"
"Got it Febrie!" Kuroko-nee said as she teleported in front of them again.
She tried to sweep the man's legs out from under him with some of those super cool martial arts she learned as a Judgement agent, but the man just jumped over her kick and lashed out with one of his own that caught Kuroko-nee right in the jaw.
"Kuroko-nee!" Janie chorused alongside Febrie as their captor sped past Mama's friend who looked dazed from the blow to her head.
"You meanie!" Febrie shouted as she glared at the man and punched his side, who suddenly stumbled and grunted in pain.
"What?" The man said as he tripped, hissing in pain as his injured leg buckled. "You're jamming my ability!?"
"Yup, 'cos you're a mean ol' kidnapper!" Febrie shot back angrily, her ahegao twitching angrily.
The man looked ready to smack Febrie but that was exactly when all the Security and Cleaning robots that Janie had left her hairs on in the area came swarming into the room.
Shinobu had said leaving her hair all over the place like that was a bad habit, but Papa and Mama said it was a smart thing to do since it gave her plenty of robo-pals that could help her when she needed it.
And they were right! Papa and Mama are so smart!
"Get him!" Janie ordered as she used her [AIM Ghost] to control them and had them tackle him to the ground.
As he fell, he lost his grip on the two girls and the twins tumbled through the air. Before they could hit the floor though, Janie felt someone catch her.
"Thanks Kuroko-nee!" She chorused with Febrie as the older girl lowered them both to the ground with a grunt of effort.
At the same time she had the robots pile on the man.
"Contamination located!"
"Cleaning, cleaning!"
"Blocking off area for deep scrubbing!"
"More bleach!"
"Threat detected! Tasing!"
"Target secured!"
These shrill robotic cries completely drowned out the meanie's well deserved cries of pain.
"Pow, boom!" Febrie exclaimed while shadow boxing. "Go go, Janie! Do like Papa and make him cry!"
"Good job, girls." Kuroko-nee said with a chuckle, while giving them headpats. Janie loved headpats. "You just took down your first baddie. Your Mama and Papa will be so proud."
"Yay!" The twins cheered.
Even as the twins finished dealing with their would be kidnapper, Mikoto was likewise trouncing his accomplices.
"Misaka-san," Nunotaba-san said eyeing the redhead's weapon. "I recognize that from a recent paper. That's the Ultra-High Pressure Water Cutters. It uses the melting of solid nitrogen to create various effects."
"Yeah and we stole it right from the high security lab where it was being developed." The redhead boasted. "All so we could use it to beat the dangerous Accelerator! But why risk it when we can just kidnap his daughters and blackmail him to get what we want? So much less dangerous."
"Seriously, how is security around these things so lax?! It's like they want their junk stolen!" Mikoto growled as she sent a wave of electricity at the other girl who blocked the attack by conjuring a wall of ice. "And you are just an idiot. You actually think you would have lived if you actually pulled off kidnapping those girls? I've dealt with a lot of morons in this city, but you take the cake."
"Especially since the weapon is imperfect," Nunotaba-san pointed out as the taller of the attackers helped the shorter girl switch out the weapon's magazine. "Not only does each magazine only have a few shots. Repeated use of the weapon will fill the area with so much Nitrogen that the air will become toxic to breathe."
"Oh, don't worry about that." The redhead said with a smirk. "We've already worked out a radical way around that."
"Yō-chan!" The high schooler behind the redhead said urgently.
"...You know, for a place called Academy City we have a lot of dumb people here." Mikoto let out a sigh. "That girl's the reason you can use the weapon safely isn't it?"
"No she isn-" The redhead hurriedly tried to say in denial, but it was too late. Before she could even finish her sentence, Mikoto had manipulated the underground mall's wiring so a bolt of electricity shot down from an overhead light just above the timid looking girl that shocked her into unconsciousness.
Jumping aside as her accomplice collapsed, the redhead could only gape in shock.
"So what do you want to blackmail Accelerator for anyways?" Mikoto asked absently as she advanced on the lone remaining attacker.
"Stay away!" The redhead screamed as she swung the twin weapon mounts of her suit at Mikoto, sending sheets of cutting ice at the [Railgun].
Ice that instantly sublimated as it hit the intense lightning storm that Mikoto shot ahead of her as a shield.
"Your ice is cold but do you know how hot lightning is? People called it heaven's fire for a reason, dimwit." Mikoto taunted. "And telegraphing your moves like that? I could tell where you were aiming from a mile away."
"Stop making fun of me!" The redhead screamed as she as she aimed at the Level 5, fury on her face only to suddenly start spasming.
"You talk too much," Nunotaba-san with a shake of her head as she put away her taser and the redhead collapsed in a twitching heap.
"Nunotaba-san, you're as sneaky as ever." Mikoto cracked a grin as she walked over.
"I'm just amazed someone would throw away their future on such a suicidal plan."
"Won't argue that it was suicidal but what exactly do you think they wanted from Accelerator anyways?"
"Money," the high schooler said having regained consciousness as she gingerly pushed herself back into a sitting position. "We wanted him to give us his DNA map so we could sell it to a lab."
"Misaka-san, can we just wrap this up? It would save us the pain of having an aneurysm at their sheer stupidity." The dark haired Testament expert asked with a sigh of weariness.
"Yeah, just… wow are you even all there?" Mikoto asked rhetorically. "That's like… the stupidest plan ever! You guys had a stolen high tech weapon which you could have sold instead, but no! You got greedy and bit off more than you can chew. Idiots the whole lot of you."
"Onee-sama! We're back!" Kuroko said as she teleported back with the twins in her arms and their unconscious kidnapper under her foot.
"Febrie and Janie beat up the dummy!" Febrie cheered as Janie nodded excitedly.
"Febrie, Janie!" Nunotaba-san cried in relief as she rushed to hug her charges.
"Shinobu!" The twins cheered and hugged her back.
"Yesh, the guy looks like he was mauled. What happened?" Mikoto asked Kuroko as she stripped the redhead of the weapon. Better safe than sorry and all that.
"The twins."
And that answered everything.
"I think their Mama and Papa's ruthlessness is contagious."
"Indeed, Onee-sama."
"What's going to happen to us now?" The high schooler asked, sitting with her knees drawn close to her chest and looking like a scared little girl.
"I've already called Anti-Skill," Kuroko told her sternly. "So it's a trip to the Reformatory for the lot of you."
The girl began sobbing.
"Better that than facing Mama and Papa Bear's wrath." Mikoto told the despondent girl honestly. "Trust me. Much better. Besides, you might get out in a few years. Or Saten will just use her legal-fu to bury you and your friends so deep that you won't ever see daylight again. Uh, good luck."
The girl's sobbing became wails.
A few hours after the attempted kidnapping found Yomikawa Aiho sitting at the dining table in her apartment watching with well disguised anxiety as Accelerator and Saten-san listened to Misaka-san explain how their twin daughters almost got abducted.
The girls in question had thankfully gotten off without so much as a scare and were even now happily playing with their elder sister, Last Order, in the latter's room under the watchful supervision of Nunotaba-san and Kikyou.
That's probably the only reason the two haven't gone on a roaring rampage of revenge yet. That and the three idiots responsible are all already rotting in the Reformatory.
"Uh, so that's about it." Misaka-san said as she finished describing what happened. "So, um, what are you going to do now?"
"Ruiko?" Accelerator asked in an ice cold voice.
"I've already hired the best legal team in the City." Saten-san said with a malicious little smirk. "When they're done with the three peices of filth, they'll wish they never existed. I'll sue them till they're homeless, penniless and so blacklisted they'll not even be able to find a job in fast food."
"That's all?"
"No. I've also arranged for some of my contacts in the Reformatory to lace their food with some interesting additives. The toilet will become so familiar to them that they'll practically become glued to it! And then I'll-"
"Saten-san, don't bring out a chart." Aiho sighed.
The brunette pouted and glowered, "But I love showing my revenge charts! I hardly ever get a chance to do so!"
"I like seeing them," Accelerator told her loyally, earning himself a grateful smile from his girlfriend.
"You're really doing all that for real!?" Misaka-san asked nervously.
"The legal team, yes." Saten-san told her friend. "The food poisoning too. Though how permanent that will be is up to chance."
"It better be," Accelerator hissed, though everyone ignored him.
"Since when did you have contacts in the Reformatory anyways?" Aiho asked warily. "Do I need to ask them to do an audit of their staff?"
It was her duty as an Anti-Skill officer in good standing to notify the Reformatory if there was any sign of corruption in its ranks, even if said corruption involved one of her charges.
"Not unless you want to ask the warden to resign." Saten-san told her seriously. "He owes me for helping him upgrade the facility's internal surveillance grid."
"Didn't you do that so Threstina wouldn't get out without you noticing," Misaka-san asked with a raised eyebrow.
"Ever heard of killing two birds with one stone?"
"With you, it's like using one stone to kill a dozen different problems all at once," Misaka-san said with a sigh. "Then blackmailing the downed birds."
"I'm not that bad."
"You are!" Aiho said in unison with Misaka-san.
"I mean, what the hell? I know we've seen idiots in this City, but come on!" Mikoto complained as she fell back on her Kohai's bed. "I mean, ugh, rub two brain cells together and you'd still know that idea would never had worked! How can people be so stupid?!"
Chuckling Namikaze reached over from where she was sitting at her desk to pat Mikoto's knee in comfort.
"The three honestly thought they could get away with it too!" Mikoto said, as she concluded her epic rant on how completely foolish the trio of would be kidnappers were. "Picking a fight with Accelerator and Saten!? Seriously?"
"Yeah, that's dumb as hell." Namikaze agreed as she leafed through a textbook. "It's not like we'd just sit idly by either. So they'd have ended up with four Level 5s out for their blood even if they succeeded."
"I know. Aren't we like a superpower or something with our roster?" Mikoto asked curiously. "I get morons would challenge us, but this feels just…"
"Over the top stupid?"
"Yes!"
Namikaze shrugged as she closed her book. "Sempai, you need to realize that idiots will be idiots and do things like challenge us. That's what makes them idiots. As soon as some idiot thinks they're smarter than the other idiots and has some 'great' idea on how to take us out, they'll come calling."
"You've dealt with this before, huh?"
Namikaze stood and flopped back into her bed, groaning. "Too often to count."
"Does it get any less frustrating to deal with?"
"Not really," Namikaze said with a sigh. "But you get used to it."
I don't want to! Mikoto wanted to whine but held the urge in.
"Enough talk about idiots!" Namikaze declared suddenly as she jumped back up into a sitting position. "Want to watch a movie instead?"
"Won't Awatsuki-san mind when she gets back?"
"Nah, Awatsuki-chan will probably just join us." Namikaze reassured her with a dismissive wave. "She's chill like that."
Mikoto mulled over the offer for a moment before nodding. It wasn't like she had anything to do right now.
"Sure. Why do you have in mind?"
"Come over here and take your pick," Namikaze said waving her tablet at Mikoto.
Nodding, the [Railgun] scooted over to have a look at what was on offer. All whilst wondering how watching movies with her Kohai was the only sane thing about today. Weird. Her days didn't use to be this insane.
Not that I mind. Mikoto thought with a smile as she settled down next to the blonde and they started their selection.
Done and done! Thanks to Nameless as always!
Ah, idiots. Am I right? The Accel anime has given us a gem of an idiot and we just had to use her. And her expendable minions. I mean, I hope we showed how much we considered this peasant gaggle of fools just plain stupid. Seriously, WTF?!
Nameless: Believe it or not, we honestly started out trying to make this one about just Mikoto and Kuroko, but then we got hit with the idea of including the three idiots from the first episode of Toaru Kagaku no Accelerator and that meant bringing in something related to Accel for them to target. Which ended up being Janie and Febrie.
At least the starting fluff was cute, and of course Febrie and Janie had some time to shine! Between Febrie's jamming and Janie with her Robo-Pals... Seriously, when they grow up (can they grow up?), they are going to be even more frightening.
You know what to do! Smash that review button and tell us what you love! No flames and peace off my peeps!