A/N: Here's hoping this episode is better than the canon one.
With respect to the reviewers:
Gucci Mane Laflare: Yeah, rewatching the episode I laughed at the cricket too. Glad you like what I'm doing with Trent. I'm also happy to hear you're enjoying the gwuncan.
Crosshot: Glad you're enjoying what I'm doing with the Topher, Amber, Alejandro plotline. Because Amber is already a caricature of the standard teen drama protag this whole plotline is meant to poke fun at the sequel thing. You know where the couple that got together at the end of the first movie suddenly start having problems just because a new girl showed up and is making the protag look bad. So stupid. Also glad you like what I'm doing with Trent.
MetalFace: No. Dawn is already with Ella and I've already randomized the two characters for World Tour. They aren't Bridgette or Ezekiel. If you want to read Bridgekiel might I suggest my team remix fanfic?
The recap began with a shot of the sun cresting over the water, followed by a shot of the sandy shore, A lone seagull with one of the plastic drink rings of a six pack around its neck rested peacefully on a buoy. "People have always been drawn to the beauty of the sea," Chris' voice overlay. This peace was quickly disturbed by a shark fin passing it. The startled Seagull flew off as the shark was revealed to be Chris with a prop fin on his head. "But that's not where we were last time!"
Ella is shown trying to ride the fake surfboard but the scene shifted to that of a tornado struck farm as Chef was shown turning on the giant fans which blew the princess wannabe off. "Ella's surfing adventure turned trailer park when a twister ruined her fun." Noah was shown trying to ride the board and losing his swim trunks. "And Noah was stripped bare." The host chucked as Noah covered his shame and ran off. "Nice pecs dude." Duncan is shown doing his run and dodging the seagulls. Followed by the Grips cheering and Sammy looking disappointed. "Thanks to Duncan's gnarly moves the Grips won the first challenge, Much to Sammy's disappointment."
Trent is shown comforting Sammy, followed by Duncan and Amy glaring at him, Noah stopping him from doing it a second time, and Noah confronting Trent in the woods. "Trent's team wasn't too happy with him supporting the leader of the other team. Even if she is his girlfriend." Amy is shown throwing a shell, which made the Taj Ma Harold collapse on itself, then it is shown rebuilt out of rocks as the Gaffer's cheered at their victory. "Amy tried to sabotage the grips by knocking down the Taj Ma Harold, but thanks to Crimson they rebuilt it better than ever and the Gaffers won the second challenge with their newly dubbed Taj Mastone."
Alejandro and Trent are shown in a dance off, followed by Chris getting bored and beginning to throw shells at the two dancers, then Alejandro collapsing to the ground when one hit is face, and finishing with Trent moonwalking. "Trent finally got his head in the dance as he and Alejandro got down. It was too close for my tastes so I spiced things up with a few seashells, and while Alejandro faltered, Trent completed his dance, Scoring the Grips a Hawaiian style luau."
Chris is shown standing on the beach set from last episode to end the recap. ":With only thirteen left, can the Grips continue their winning streak? Find out next, on Total Drama Action!"
(intro)
{A standing light pops up on a set with skyscrapers in the background. A hanging light swoops in front of a set with houses in the background, then a camera pops out of a sewer with a rat on it, and another camera pops out of a hole in a tree scaring the raccoon inside. A masculine hand raises up a clapboard and sets it off.}
Dear Mom and Dad, I'm doin' fine;
{The camera's point of view shows a film lot with the two trailers, city background, water tower, and fake hill. Chris drives by in a golf cart, and the camera flies through to the warehouses as crew members push a couple backdrops through, follows by the costume rack. )
You guys are on my mind!
{The camera goes up the fake hill and down into a small pool where Jo is swimming, a shark is behind her. Jo notices it and turns around to punch it in the nose.)
Ya asked me what I wanted to be,
And now I think the answer is plain to see!
(The camera moves out of the water to show Scott on a surfboard held up by machinery. He desperately tries to dodge several seagulls being shot at him. One finally hits him and he falls over.)
I wanna be...famous!
(The camera moves left to show Duncan as the one shooting the gulls from a gull cannon with Gwen right beside, laughing along with him. Duncan turns and Gwen looks at her feet, rubbing her left arm nervously. The camera moves on to show the sastchwawanakwa in a pink dress, matching boa, and straw hat. The door slides open and the camera goes through)
I wanna live close to the sun!
(A beach set is shown with Alejandro and Amber lounging on a beach chair together, a shark sits in a beach chair to either side of them wearing sunglasses.)
Well pack your bags, 'cause I've already won!
(Topher is shown in the make-up confessional having it applied. A hand sprays something in his eye accidentally)
Everythin' to prove, nothin' in my way;
(Trent and Amy are standing on rock pillars with padded poles. Amy hits Trent several times before he hits her back sending some of her hair down.)
I'll get there one day.
(The hair lands in a pot of sludge Chef is cooking. He shrugs and turns to Sammy who looks nervous but determinedly back at him.)
'Cause I wanna be...famous!
(Harold and Ellody are shown standing in front of a set of screens in the security room. Harold presses a random button and causes an explosion. )
(Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)
(We focus in on one screen where a grizzly bear is growling towards Ella. The princess wannabe smiles at him sweetly, the bear smiles back and the two dance. )
I wanna be! I wanna be! I wanna be famous! (N a-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)
(They dance their way past the lame-o-sine and the back window lowers to show Noah and Crimson inside. The camera continues through the window as camera flashes go off. Chris is shown standing at a podium in a powder blue tux. He opens an envelope.)
I wanna be! I wanna be! I wanna be famous! (Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)
(The scene moves out to show Chef is in a sparkly hot pink dress and matching Chef's hat, along with sliver earrings and necklace. Chris looks a little weirded out. The camera moves back through a large screen then pans down to Geoff and Kitty sitting on a couch about to make out.)
*The sound of the theme being whistled goes through the air *
(They notice the camera and decide not to kiss, the scene moves back to show a small studio with two couches to either side of the one the couple is sitting at. The rest of the cast in sitting on them as the large screen above flashes to the Total Drama action logo. )
(end of intro)
The episode proper begins with a shot of the sun high in the sky, the focus shifted to show Ella and Amy huddled desperately under a white and purple umbrella, clearly suffering under the heat. The focus shifted over to Sammy, Trent and Ellody in a similar situation under the yellow awning to the girl's trailer. It proceeded over the to boy's trailer where Harold slowly pulled himself into the window. "Too hot to do anything!" He complained, collapsing quickly.
(confessional)
Harold: My mad skills are leaching out of me, I can feel it, my mojo isn't sweatproof!
Static
Alejandro, Amber and Topher are in lounge chairs under the magenta awning of the boy's trailer. Alejandro and Amber are both on the same lounge chair, with the bookworm on Alejandro's lap. "It's too hot Chica." The Spaniard sighed.
"At least I get to see you dripping with sweat.." Amber smirked. Alejandro smirked back. Topher huffed and looked away.
The focus moved out to show Duncan soaking his feet in a bucket of water under a wooden bench while Gwen sat in an inflatable pool nearby. Finally Crimson and Noah are shown sitting under a tree."When people say they want the world to end in fire, they usually think that means it'll be quick, but if it's anything like this I'll pass." Noah sighed.
"I wouldn't mind." Crimson deadpanned. Noah fell over, his head landing on the goth's lap.
"It's over. Just let the heat death of the universe take me." the cynic moaned, closing his eyes. Crimson covered her mouth. Noah sneakily opened an eye and smirked.
(Confessional)
Noah: When Crimson covers her mouth it usually means she's smiling or laughing and doesn't want anyone to see. I love breaking through her carefully calculated aloofness.
Static
Crimson: You can't prove anything.
Static
The focus is on Chris' face, the brim of a cowboy hat is visible, and he has a toothpick in his mouth as he gives a thousand yard stare. He cocks a gun and shoots it off, causing the focus to shift quickly between several members of the cast as each of their reactions to the noise are shown. Gwen starts in the inflatable pool, Harold jolts upwards hitting his head on the top of the window he'd be lurking in, Sammy screams and grabs on to Trent shaking. "Chris!"
"My cranium." Harold groaned, rubbing his head.
"Take it easy," Chris told them, a revolver in each hand, "guns are loaded with blanks." He blew the smoke from the gun he'd shot into Harold's face, the holstered the revolvers with a twirl. " Least I'm pretty sure one of 'em is." He chuckled.
The host began to talk in a horrible western accent as he moved to the center of the area. "Since there's no beatin' the heat, we're goin' west this week! There's a town meetin' at high noon! Be there, or I'll drive ya deadbeats outta town!"
"If it weren't for the million I'd take you up on that." Noah said.
(Confessional)
Crimson: (The makeup people desperately try to reapply the goth's makeup, but it's of no use, the makeup starts to melt down her face.) If only my foundation didn't weigh so much.
Static.
The focus is on a silver pocketwatch in Chris' hand, it hits noon and Chris lowers it, revealing the western set from the first episode. A lonely tumbleweed rolls across the street, before lighting on fire and burning to ash.
A flash transition later and we see Amy, Ella, Sammy, and Trent. Crimson walks past and Amy gasps as Ella screams and both Trent and Sammy's eyes widen.
"How do you look like a bigger horror show than usual?" Amy remarked.
"I think the dripping effect is kinda cool." Gwen said.
"Listen up, pardners!" Chris said, as he closed the pocket watch and pocketed it. "In any good Western there are heroes, outlaws, horses, and pretty dames." As he spoke the focus moved out to show everyone is lined up under what looks like the bottom of a water tower. Chris walked along the contestants as he continued. "The hero defeats the outlaw, then rides off into the sunset on the horse."
"And the pretty dame?" Ella asked.
"None of your beeswax!" the host snapped harshly causing Ella to back up. Then he chuckled and pat her on the head. "Just messin' with ya! They usually hang out in the saloon during the bar brawl."
"Bar brawl! Cool!" Harold said, doing some really bad punches in the air and weaving his feet oddly. He passed Ellody who watched on, then Duncan who stuck his foot out and tripped the geek, causing him to land in the water trough.
"Awesome reenactment Harold. Most brawls do end with the loser in the water trough." Duncan remarked.
(confessional)
Ellody: It is a shame Duncan's self conscious nature makes him act out. That is no excuse for his behavior though. I will have to keep an eye on Harold, in case he should become injured.
Static
Harold sat up and shook his head to remove the water, it hit Noah in the face. "I'd say you were acting like a dog, but that would insult my golden lab."
"Enough with the sarcasm! All eyes on me!" Chris said as he shot off his revolvers into the air. "Time for your first challenge! No cowboy worth spittin' at would go one day without saddle practice," He continued as he twirled his guns and holstered them again. "Time to saddle up!"
The focus shifted to a brown horse with lighter brown spots, a darker brown mane, and white 'socks'. It was old, gaunt, and fly-ridden. As it drank from a bucket it front of it, it farted a nauseous green cloud.
"That's the best steed we could afford?!" Chris asked irately as the focus shifted to show Chef in a nearby shed working an adding machine. He wore a green visor.
"You want a five-star hotel, and champagne, and caviar for breakfast, hmm?" The cook said. "I gotta cut somewhere!"
Chris grinned. "It's perfect! Don't change a thing!"
(Confessional)
Ella: I love horses! They're such noble steeds! If Dawn was here she'd love this.
Static
Harold: I spent three summers at medieval Steve's medieval camp. We learned to joust, ride horses, and how to look manly in tights. It's harder than it looks.
Static
Trent: Who says a western has to end with the guy and his horse? That lone ranger stuff is overrated. Why not take the girl with you when you ride off into the sunset?
Static
"You call this a challenge?" Duncan scoffed, moving to mount the horse, which was now on a target.
"Not so fast," Chris said, as the focus shifted out to show everyone. "You cowboys and cowbabes are gonna have to mount the steed from up there," The focus shifted out to show the railing of the water tower. "Not there," Chris corrected. The focus zoomed out much further to show yet another ladder leading to a diving board far above the water tower. "waaaaaay up there!"
"Since the Grips won last week they go first," Chris continued as Noah and Trent gave each other nervous looks. "our unpaid interns have assured us it's safe." He gave a nod to his right and a ripple effect takes us back to Chef at the top of the board stomping down on an offscreen intern's fingers despite his protests.
"No! No! Ahhhhhh!" The intern screamed as Chef finally succeeded. He fell to the ground with a smack.
Chef smirked "Looks safe to me," He chuckled.
Back in the present Gwen is protesting. "We won last week. Why do we have to go first?"
"Because I said so!" the host snapped. "And I'm your host, Chris McLean."
"Looks like you're up Trent." Amy smirked.
"Actually I don't recall Chris saying the leader needed to go first." Noah smirked.
Gwen chuckled. "That's true, as leader Trent can decide who goes first." The goth said, indicating her head towards Amy.
Trent smirked. "All in favor of Amy?" Everyone but Ella and Amy raised their hands.
(confessional)
Amy: What is with everyone ganging up on me?!
Static
Sammy: Is it bad I'm enjoying this?
Static
A view of the diving board from below is shown briefly before cutting back to Amy. "This is insane!"
"Hey if someone has to die." Duncan shrugged.
"You know I bet Sammy would do it." Noah smirked.
Amy's gaze hardened. "Fine I'm going."
A view of the diving board from below is shown as the ladder sways, a flash transition later and Amy has finally reached the board. She looks over it and swallows.
From down below Sammy called. "What's the matter Amy? Scared?"
(confessional)
Amy; Where does Samey think she gets off talking to me like that?!
Static
Sammy: There's nothing wrong with taunting a member of the other team…right?
Static
Amy got a determined look on her face. "I'll show her." She ran to the edge of the board and jumped off. The view was below her as she plummeted.
(confessional)
Harold: (Writing in a notebook) Acceleration equals mass times the gravitational constant occasional equational. (He looks up from it) Not good people. Not good.
Static
The view is from above the target as Amy falls screaming loudly. A smack is heard as the horse whinnies from the impact. Amy groans. "Take that Samey." She manages to say before falling off the horse.
Sammy glances at Alejandro. "Um, do you think the taunt from earlier was too much?"
"Not at all. Like I said, you're just taking a stand." Alejandro reassured her.
Chris can be heard laughing from out of sight. "That was awesome, Amy!" The view shifted back to show everyone as the Grip symbol appeared in the upper left corner. "Grips: 1; Gaffers, you're up!"
Sammy took a deep breath. "If Amy can do it, so can I!"
A flash transition later Sammy is screaming as she jumps off of the board, she closes her eyes. A smack is heard off screen and it's revealed that Sammy has landed directly next to the horse. She groans. "Or not."
Amy laughs and Trent pushes her out of the way. "Hey what was that for?"
"I need to make my attempt." Trent told her.
/
The guitarist is shown jumping off of the board from below, then above as he falls it becomes clear he's going to miss the target. He screams and a crash is heard off screen. It's revealed Trent has landed on one of the fence posts right on his nuts. He falls over.
Chris winces at the sight. "Yeesh, glad it wasn't me! Grips: 1; Gaffers: Zip! Alejandro, you're next."
/
Alejandro is shown at the top of the platform with a confident smile. He jumps off the board in and elegant dive, flipping over the land on the horse with ease. He winks at Amber and she blushes. "And the Gaffers tie it up! Noah, let's go."
/
Noah is immediately shown jumping off the board and screaming he lands on the horse and heaves a sigh of relief before quickly jumping off the horse just as Duncan lands on it. "Nice. You know we're on the same team?" He groaned standing up.
"Exactly, I fall on you and you pad my landing. See? Teamwork." Duncan chuckled. Noah gave him an unamused look.
"Grips: 3; Gaffers: 1. Crimson your turn." Chris said.
A flash transition later and Crimson is jumping off the board with no expression. The horse looked up and whinnied in fear rising on its hind legs. Despite this Crimson managed to land in the saddle.
"Grips: 3; Gaffers: 2." Chris announced. As the goth walked back to her team Noah smiled at her. Crimson nodded back. Nearby Alejandro's eyes narrowed.
/
Ella is shown flying through the air during her attempt, her dress acting like a parachute, a strong wind picked up and blew her off screen where she screamed. From the ground Trent gasped. "She's headed for the electrical wires!" The sound of Ella being electrocuted is heard along with some flashes of light.
Amy turned to Chris. "You're gonna send someone to help her!" She ordered.
Chris began to laugh, only for the footage to pause as the focus zoomed out to show Chris in the security room holding a paper and very clearly reading his lines off it as he talks in a stilted voice. "We here at Total Drama Action care about the health and welfare of our competitors. Furthermore no animals were hurt in the making of this show."
/
The horse is shown drinking out of it's bucket was the focus moves up the ladder to show Ellody and Harold standing at the top. "With our knowledge of physics we should be able to accomplish this task." Ellody said.
"I agree, with my mad skills this will be easy." Harold said.
"We need only hope our impact isn't too hazardous." The genius said. The two jumped and landed on the horse. Harold grinned. "Wicked."
"Grips: 3; Gaffers: 4." Chris said. "Gwen?"
/
The goth is shown up at the top of the board she swallows. We hear Duncan call up. "You've got this pasty!"
Gwen smiled. "Let's do this!" She jumped off the board and landed on the horse. "Yes!"
"All right!" Chris declared. "The Grips and Gaffers are tied at four points each' The host walked to Topher and Amber. "It's up to you two to break the tie. Who wants to take one for the Gaffers?"
"Why don't you go Amber?" Topher said, pushing the bookworm. Amber grabbed his hand and pushed him forward as well.
"No, I insist, you must want to impress your idol." The brunette said. Both were right next to the ladder now. Glaring at each other they both grabbed it.
A flash transition later and both are shown climbing up the ladder on ether side. "I wouldn't be caught wearing a turtleneck on TV." Topher was saying.
"At least my hair isn't reminiscent of a greaser from the fifties." Amber retorted.
They kept climbing and Topher is shown climbing onto the board. "Well I'm not dating out of my league."
"Of course not, you're too busy fanboying over sadistic reality TV hosts, who haven't been relevant for decades." The bookworm smirked.
"Take that back!" Topher snapped as he pushed Amber off the board, Amber grabbed his hand, dragging him down with her. The two are shown falling from below, then the horse is shown drinking out of its bucket peacefully.
Sammy looked confused. "Where are they?"
"Not there." Chris said, pointing to the horse. "Way up there!" The focus shifted out to shoe Topher and Amber hanging from the weathervane at the top of the barn. Topher's pants had caught, as had the bottom of Amber's turtleneck.
The focus shifted to them as Amber;s shirt tore. "Oh no!" the fabric broke and Amber fell with a scream, only to be caught bridal style by Alejandro. She gasped. "Gracias mi Amarilis."
Alejandro smiled. "Is that a pet name?"
"It took a while to decide on one but yes." Amber told him.
"I love it,chica." the Spainard said.
"Okay enough with the mushy stuff!" Chris interrupted. "Looks like the teams are still tied at four a piece, on to the next challenge for the tiebreaker Cowpokes!" Everyone followed him as he walked off screen.
The focus shifted up to the weathervane where Topher is chuckling nervously. "You are going to get me down right Chris? Right?"
/
The contestants are shown lined up as Chris's legs move into a bow-legged position . The focus shifted out to show the host in front of the contestants. "The hallmark of any good Western is the quick draw cowboy showdown. Captains will pick their strongest cowpoke in what will likely be a fight to the death!" The host chuckled. His phone rang and he answered. "Yello? Uh huh? Fine." He hung up. "Our lawyers have informed me that you may shoot until someone is mildly injured or cries like a little baby, but a fight to the death is strictly prohibited. Time to pick your cowboys."
Trent turned to his team. "Listen, I know he said the strongest, but this is a shootout so what we really need is someone who's hard to hit. Noah you're up."
"What!" The cynic protested.
"Cool, Gaffers?" Chris asked.
"I volunteer my mad skills!" Harold said.
"Okay." Sammy agreed
/
Noah and Harold are shown standing in the road with their guns. The focus is on Chris as he says. "3,2,1, Draw!" An over the shoulder shot is shown as Noah dodges three shots from Harold, left, right, left. The same over the shoulder shot is shown as Harold bends so far backwards three of Noah's shots miss.
The focus returns to a wide view from the side. Both boys are completely dry.
Chris looked annoyed. "Seriously. Neither of you could hit each other?"
"Well don't look at me. I ain't lugging anymore water in this heat." Chef told Chris.
Chris huffed. "Okay new challenge!"
/
The focus shifts down from a mountain to Chris standing before the contestants with a fence behind him. The Grips stand to the left, and the Gaffers stand to the right. "Since Noah and Harold couldn't hit each other, your final challenge of the day will be calf roping." Chris said.
"How grand!" Ella clapped. "But where are the baby cows?"
"There aren't any." The host continued. "Gaffers are the cowboys, Grips are the cattle. The cowboys rope the cattle they win. The cattle dodge the cowboys they win."
"Well how do we know who's who?" Trent asked.
"Gaffers get to wear these stylin cowboy hats." Chris explained holding up a brown one. "Grips get to wear udders!" He continued holding up a hat that looked like an udder.
"You had to ask." Amy snapped at Trent.
"Well I think Trent can make the hat look handsome. He'll be udderly gorgeous." Sammy giggled.
(Confessional)
Sammy: Udderly gorgeous? What was I thinking!
Static
Noah: (wearing udder hat) Not. A. Word.
Static
Duncan: (Also wearing Udder hat) Stupid million bucks.
Static
Chris has one foot planted on a bale of hay. "Would the cattle care for some hay?"
"Would the host care for an udder sandwich?" Duncan retorted.
"I'm good." Chris said, not seeming intimidated at all. "Chef will now judge the competition. Yo Chef!"
The cook stepped on screen wearing a pink bonnet and matching shoulderless ball gown made out of a material see through enough to show his legs and underwear. He opened a pink fan.
"Love the dress Cheffette." Chris laughed and Chef growled. A flash transition later and Chris is being tied to a fence post by the cook.
"Maybe when I change, I'll come back and untie you." The co host glared, taking up his skirt and walking away.
"I can't feel my arms." Chris whined. He sighed. "Let the calf roping begin!"
/
The Grips began to run away and the Gaffers started to chase after.
Ella is shown first running away from Alejandro, who is wearing a black cowboy hat,. He throws his lasso and easily catches her. "So this is how the baby cow feels." The princess wannabe says.
Harold and Ellody ,both wearing brown hats, are shown running after Duncan. Harold throws his rope but Duncan dodges, before Harold can retrieve his lasso Duncan grabs the other end and pulls causing the rope to wrap around Harold. "Get out of that nerd!" The punk laughed. Ellody crouched down and began to attempt to untie Harold.
Sammy, wearing a white hat, is chasing after Amy. The mean twin comes to a halt and Sammy throws her lasso only for Amy to move aside, causing Sammy to lasso a stake instead. The mean twin laughed. "Next time aim for me Samey!" She ran and Sammy quickly got the lasso back so she could continue the chase.
/
Noah and Crimson, also wearing a black hat, back into each other. They jump back and Noah immediately runs the other direction. Crimson twirls her lasso around a few times and throws it catching Noah before he gets out of range. The goth tugged on the rope drawing Noah straight to her side. "Caught you." She whispered. Noah's face turned bright red and he fell over.
(Confessional)
Noah: (Still stunned) So that's what it's like to feel amorous.
Static
Crimson: And here people were saying my boyfriend wouldn't enjoy being hunted down like a prey animal.
Static
Sammy is shown chasing Amy once again. The mean twin smirked. "Just give it up, Samey!"
"Not until I rope you." Sammy replied.
In another section of the area Amber, wearing another brown hat, was chasing after Duncan, across from them Topher, in a dark blue hat, was chasing Gwen. Duncan looked at Gwen with a smirk. Gwen nodded and the two continued to run towards each other. As they reached each other Amber threw her lasso, as did Topher. With matching smirks the two ran down at the last second, causing Amber to lasso Topher, and Topher to lasso Amber. Both fell over.
"This is your fault!" Topher snapped.
"My fault? Your aim was just as lousy!" Amber retorted.
/
Alejandro, Crimson, Harold, Ellody and Sammy are all shown chasing after Duncan, Gwen, Amy, and Trent. The latter group comes across the ropes that had previously tied up Chris. They smirk and grab the lassos. Ellody and Harold ran with Duncan in hot pursuit. He threw his lasso and caught both in the loop.
Next Amy turned around and threw her lasso at Sammy, not deterred from her mission Sammy threw her own lasso and they both got caught. Gwen and Trent corner Crimson and manage to lasso her. Finally Duncan, Gwen, and Trent all threw lassos at Alejandro. Even he couldn't dodge all of them. Amber and Topher were still stuck in their own lassos and Trent grabbed the ends. Together the four uncaptured Grips brought the seven captured Gaffers to Chris.
"Well what do we have here? The cattle roped the cowboys. A bit unexpected but what the heck, the Grips win!"
The Grips cheered about their win. Noah smirked. "We won!"
Duncan smirked. "No thanks to you."
"I distracted Crimson." the cynic deadpanned.
"Right, 'Distracted'." The delinquent chuckled
Chris stood next to a fire with a poker in it. "You Gaffers are losers, And you know what happens to losers." With that he pulled something out of the fire, revealing it was not a poker but rather a branding iron with an L on the end. "Which Gaffer wants to take the heat?"
The Gaffers all gasped, save Crimson who walked forward, her face still deadpan. "Why not?" She shrugged.
(confessional)
Crimson: I've never felt heated iron on my skin. I imagine it's agonizing. (Despite her words she seems excited.)
Static
Chris put out the branding iron in a small trough of water next to him. "Legal says branding's out. Looks like I have to settle for booting one of you in the most exciting Gilded Chris ceremony evah!" He said "Now, go get a shower. You all stink."
/
Harold is shown sudsing his hair in the shower. A line of campers is behind him all in their towels, from left to right stand Duncan,Ellody, Amy, Ella, Amber, Topher, and Sammy.
"Harold, could you hurry?" The nice twin asked.
"Yeah, save some time for the people who need it." Topher added.
"I guess you would need extra time to get all the gel out of your hair." Amber snarked.
"My hair is all natural!" the blonde protested.
Duncan, having had enough, shook the barrel. "But I haven't finished sudsing my hair!" Harold complained.
"Right, sorry." Duncan smirked, dunking Harold under the water. He came up gasping for breath. "Took care of it. Now get out of the barrel."
(confessional)
Harold: Gosh there was no need to be rude!
Static
Duncan: What? Everyone else wanted him out too.
Static
Noah exits the showers in a teal towel. Crimson is waiting outside, her makeup no longer dripping down her face. "You didn't want to wait for Harold either?"
"I'm surprised anyone is." Noah deadpanned.
"I needed to redo my makeup after it started to drip off my face earlier." Crimson agreed.
"About that, if you wear less layers it won't be as bad." The cynic advised.
"I know, but then I don't look like the grave." The goth told him.
"Anyway, so your team's first elimination. Any idea who's on the chopping block?" Noah asked.
"Not sure, but it isn't Amber, Alejandro, or Topher. They're in an alliance." Crimson told him.
"Huh. Not too surprised. It was likely Alejandro's idea, and with Sammy as his patsy he has over half the team under his thumb already." The cynic nodded.
The focus shifted left to show Alejandro in the shadows listening in.
/
Topher and Amber are standing outside the craft tent when Alejandro arrives. "So our first alliance meeting. Who do we vote off?" Amber asked.
"I say we get rid of Harold, Ellody is enough brains for the team so he's basically useless." Topher suggested.
"You're just mad he took so long in the barrel." Amber said.
"So what? It's not like anyone has screwed up majorly today." Topher shrugged.
"Actually I have someone else in mind. You see, I found out today that our team has an information leak." Alejandro told them.
Topher's eyes widened. "Who?"
"Crimson." Alejandro said.
"Of course! She's probably strategizing with Noah!" Topher gasped.
"Yes, and now he knows about our alliance." Alejandro continued.
"We have to get rid of her." Topher agreed.
"What say you chica?" The Spaniard asked.
Amber nodded. "If you think its for the best mi amarilis."
"Then we're agreed." Alejandro smirked.
"Seriously though, is that the best pet name you could come up with? A flower?" The blonde asked Amber.
"Amigo, in floriology, Amarilis is representative of beauty, pride, and inner worth. I'm honored she chose to associate it with me." Alejandro explained.
Amber smiled at him. "I knew you'd get it."
(confessional)
Topher: How is Alejandro supposed to be the amazing villain I know he is if he's distracted by romance?
Static
The stage with the two giant Chris statues is shown as spotlights wave in front of it. A series of clips featuring Chris from last season ,several of them just him talking, roll over the screen in two parallel lines, a vertical line of clips include one where Chris is dress as a pirate rolls down between them, as two more clips, one of Chris in a helicopter and one of him with a clapboard, move out to either side, the focus zooms out to show a giant gilded Chris as fireworks go for in the background.
The Gaffers are all shown sitting on the wooden bleachers and voting on their devices. Crimson, Sammy, Ellody, and Harold on the bottom row, and Amber, Topher and Alejandro on the top row. The focus shifted to Chris standing in front of his podium in his tux. "The votes have been cast. If you get a gilded Chris, it means you're safe. For now."
Chef walked on stage in his normal cook's uniform save for a black tailcoat and purple bow tie. Chris looks surprised. "What happened to your dress?" Chef two of his fingers from his eyes to Chris.
"And the gilded Chris goes to Sammy and Elodie." Chris announced. Sammy beamed as she caught her chocolate while Elodie smiled smugly. "Alejandro, Amber, and Topher." The three all caught their chocolate. Tense music played as the focus shifted to Harold and Crimson. The nerd looks nervous but the goth remains as aloof as ever. "And last but not least…Harold."
The nerd caught his chocolate happily. "Yes! I knew you'd all appreciate my mad skills!"
"Crimson, it's time to go." Chris smirked. Crimson didn't even look upset or shocked. "Hello? This is the part where you get upset?" The goth remained deadpan. "Fine just go already!"
Crimson walked down the red carpet of shame, as she reached the lame-o-sine she was about to get in when a droll voice remarked. "Leaving without saying goodbye? How heartless of you."
Crimson turned to Noah. "I wasn't sure you'd show up."
"You think I'm as heartless as you are?" Noah scoffed.
Crimson sighed. "Being around all the other contestants without you will be draining."
"Yeah, but hey you can always read to escape from the mundane nature of reality." The cynic smirked, he handed her a book.
"The shadow over innsmouth?" Crimson read.
"You've probably already read it, but I figured it'd give you something to do." Noah said. Crimson remained silent. Noah leaned forward and kissed her.
Chef pushed the two apart. "It's a half hour show!"
Crimson got into the lame-o-sine as Noah called. "I'll miss you!"
(Confessional)
Noah: That makes the second time Alejandro's gotten my girlfriend eliminated. I relied on her a lot last season. She was basically my strength. Which means if I want to get far, I need allies. (He sighs) And I was hoping to avoid socializing.
The focus shifts out from the confessional to the monitor room where Chris is. "Looks like Noah's gonna have to up his game." He turns to the audience. "See all you groovy cats next time on Total! Drama! Action!
(bonus clip)
Crimson is sitting in the lame-o-sine reading the book Noah just gaver her. She glances up at the camera. "Am I supposed to say something? I guess I'll miss Noah, but I don't really care otherwise. I'm probably going to lock myself away from everyone else and get lost in Eldritch horror." Someone says something off screen. Crimson sighs. "An aftermath? People only watch that kind of thing to forget about their pathetic little lives." With that the goth returns to reading.
A/N: I know the cattle roping the cowboys was the twist in the original, but I feel the sequence was different enough to make up for that. And Crimson is gone. Probably not too much of a surprise. I didn't have much planned for her and out of the Gaffers she's the only one without a storyline. Plus she needs to leave for Noah's plot to get started. That plot being him having to work with other allies to get further in the game. I know they got a lot of focus this episode but that's because I wanted to get some cute Noimson moments before Crimson left. Anyway I hope you enjoyed this. The next episode is our first aftermath.