ULTRAVIOLENCE

Yamazaki Miyako never thought her life would turn out this way: Sitting in front of all the faces that made up the most fearsome criminal organizations in Japan, commanding them, Miyako had Bonten in the palm of her hand, and she could crush them whenever she wanted. However, when her past came to haunt her, Miyako realized she might not be as untouchable as she thought.

Sano Manjiro had given up hope for a better future a long time ago. The only thing keeping him from going insane was his best friend Miyako, whose presence felt as distant as the memories that kept him up at night. Every day, he observed her in deep, dark devotion. Her image was all he could ever think about, all he could ever hope to see.

If only she would look at him the same way...

Originally posted on Ao3.

Part One of 'The Devil Series'.

1: BEHIND EVERY MAN

[2018, MARCH 19]

7:30 p.m.

"She is late," Sanzu Haruchiyo announced after the pointers of his pocket watch hit half-past seven, an hour after the scheduled meeting. His shoe made a patterned beat on the expensive carpet beneath him as he shot look after look at the ticking clock on his hand. "She is late again," he added, this time more pointedly.

"Hush, Sanzu. Maya will be here when she gets here." Sano Manjiro stared at him.

A stare that could kill.

Ironically, Mikey's gaze was the least deadly thing about him. With his dyed platinum hair, oversized clothes, and flip-flops kicked high on the wooden table in front of him, Sano Manjiro looked nothing like the extremely dangerous criminal he was.

"You have to stop making excuses for her, Mikey." Sanzu pushed on his little tangent, not done with his complaints. "She never shows up on time, unless it involves some type of torture or murder. She might be a good leader, but this is ridiculous!"

"I said hush." Mikey kicked the table. The glasses of much too expensive liquor trembled. Mikey ignored his colleagues, despite their loud complaints. "How dare you speak of your boss like that? Want to get your ass kicked?"

Sanzu shot up and threw his arms around the room. "By whom? All of them agree with me!"

"Speak for yourself." Kokonoi Hajime crossed his arms over his chest, his long strands of dyed blonde hair falling wildly over his shoulders. "You seem to be the only one with a problem here."

"Fuck you," Sanzu spat but took a look around the room to notice everyone relaxed in their chairs, sipping at their liquor.

"Perhaps he wants a problem with his precious Mikey instead," Haitani Rindo suggested with a smile.

"Yeah, Sanzu. Mikey is insane when it comes to Boss. She's like a goddess to him or something." Kokonoi pressed his finger further into the wound.

The men looked at Mikey in expectation. It was dangerous to provoke Mikey like that, especially when he had been drinking. He was known to act on impulse when enraged, and Kokonoi tried his best to bring that out of him. Their hearts pumped faster when Mikey shot up from his seat, walked past Sanzu and stopped right by his side. Eyes glued on Kokonoi, Mikey reached over Sanzu's shoulder, grabbed the liquor bottle, and poured more of the coppery liquid into his cup.

It was dangerous to provoke him, but that day he didn't feel like fighting.

Sipping the alcohol, he walked back to his seat, placed the bottle next to him, plopped down on his chair, and kicked his feet back up on the table.

"Watch it," he simply warned, looking up from his glass to look at Kokonoi again, on the opposite side of the table, who watched him with a grin.

"You idiots got it all wrong." Akashi Takeomi exhaled a big cloud of smoke into the air. "You should be careful with the Boss herself. If she heard you say all that shit, she would have you stuck with her for hours on a cell until you bark on command."

The men burst into laughter, any ounce of tension that was felt before lifting through the air like the smoke from Takeomi's cigar.

Sanzu fell back on his chair, defeated. "You guys are the fucking worst."

"Boss isn't what she used to be," said Mochizuki Kanji, playing with his glass as he spoke. "She has mellowed out recently."

The men agreed.

"Back then I used to be terrified to look her in the eyes," confessed Kakucho, looking at the untouched liquor they had poured for him.

Mikey chuckled at the idea. It wasn't strange for people to confess their fear of Maya. She had been a menace when she was younger, and when she and Mikey got together she worsened. 'The Almighty Two', as they were referred to. They used to spread horror in the streets of Tokyo when they were youngsters. Every gang knew of them, and they all feared them.

Haitani Ran shrugged. "I never had an issue with that," he said.

"And that's why you had your ass kicked so many times," fired Rindo back with a laugh. Ran elbowed his brother's ribs, but he only laughed more.

"We all have to admit we were scared of her back in the day," said Sanzu, who was still watching the clock hands race after each other.

"Scared? More like terrified." The men laughed at Kokonoi's correction. "The first time I saw her I thought I was looking at the Devil himself," he shuddered.

"And you were."

Mikey's voice traveled through the room and hit the men like a punch.

Throats cleared and some of them tried coughing in attempts to fill in the awkward silence that fell over them. Their eyes were on Mikey, whose naturally serious expression didn't waver for a second.

He wasn't joking, and they all were painfully aware of that.

"You did warn us," admitted Kokonoi.

Sanzu's armchair creaked as he changed his position, lifting his leg. "When did you fucks stop being scared of her, anyway? Are you looking down on the Boss?"

"Jesus, man. Nobody said such a thing," said Rindo, annoyed.

"That's what I heard." Sanzu banged his fist on the table and shot up from his seat. "I'll turn you to mush if you betray her."

"Quiet, Sanzu," ordered Mikey without looking at him, and, like a dog, his friend obliged, sitting back down on his armchair.

"Christ." Rindo rolled his eyes. "You're a freak. You shouldn't be allowed to speak while you're high."

Sanzu's dilated pupils shone under the lamplight. "Oh, yeah?" he asked his colleague with a deranged grin.

"Come to think of it." Haitani Ran dipped his finger in the content of his cup before rubbing it on the brim, making a wet, almost magical sound spread through the room. "Isn't she your boss too, Mikey?"

Mikey stopped drinking and narrowed his eyes as he looked at the man. "Did I ever fucking say she wasn't?"

"It's just..." Ran grabbed his cup and lifted it to his mouth, soaking his tongue in the stinging liquid. "You never seem to obey her orders. You always go against her word and cause problems where, normally, there's no need for any." Mikey clenched his jaw. "Why doesn't Sanzu here have a problem with you?"

"Want me to have a problem with you instead?" Sanzu began to move up from his chair again, but Mikey lifted his hand for him to stop.

Mikey stared at the executive and shook his head. "A tale as old as time," he muttered. Ran flinched right before the big, heavy doors of the meeting room popped open and he could continue their conversation.

At the entryway, stood the elegant figure of a woman, dressed in designer clothes, from head to toe. Taking her lustrous fur jacket off, exposing the lilac dress underneath, she gave it to a staff member, who disappeared promptly. Her wild, black hair cast a shadow around her angelic face. Her red-tinted lips formed into a soft grin as the men stood all at once. All but Mikey, who stood seated, with his feet resting on the table and his cup in his hand. She watched them, her light eyes jumping from head to head as if counting them. Her smile grew into a grin as she walked in, the click-clack of her high heels echoing through the room, as she made her way slowly to the head of the large, wooden table. She passed the men, whose backs had grown largely tense, and brushed her fingertips on the back of their chairs. The heavy jewelry she was wearing mocked the beating of their heart as she moved.

When she reached her spot, she sat, placing her delicate hands on the table in front of her.

The doors got closed, and she nodded once. In one big motion, they all bowed and sat, waiting for her to speak. But, she continued to smile.

Watching.

"You are late." Mikey was the first to break the silence. His cold gaze watched as her lips formed into an irritated smile. "What's your excuse this time?"

"It's nice to see you too, Manjiro." She stretched her hands toward the other men, not yet looking at Mikey himself. "Boys."

"Boss," they resounded.

She chuckled. "Shall we begin?"

Mikey stretched his arms above his head, yawning loudly. He was trying to provoke Maya, but it would take much more out of him for her to snap. Sometimes the other members would get irritated instead, and a big fight would break out. These usually ended in her punishing them, which directly translated to 'kicking the shit out of them'. Mikey's behavior usually worsened whenever he was planning on getting wasted, which, that day, was luckily the case. The expensive liquor bottle that had been full to the brim was now close to finishing, barely touched by the other members, and Mikey wasn't quite done drinking for today, either.

Kakucho cleared his throat before speaking. "If I may: There's progress on our case with the Yakuza, ma'am."

Her eyes moved lazily toward him. "Which one?"

"Tojima Family."

Maya's eyebrows rose. "Is there?"

"It's quite tedious information–"

"Bore me with the details," she interrupted, waving at him to keep it moving.

"Certainly…" He blushed and looked away from her. "Firstly, the boss of the Tojima family tried to contact you today to schedule a meeting. He was informed you were out and was told to come in on Friday. There's–"

Maya dropped her smile. "This Friday?"

Kakucho froze.

"It's the twenty-third if you aren't aware," Mikey teased, bumping his hand on her arm.

"I am aware." She side-eyed him.

"Ma'am, I-" Kakucho paused and shook his head. "We can reschedule, if necessary."

"No." She said, her previous soft smile returning to her rouge lips. "This Friday is fine, Kakucho. But, as I have told you before, I would like to be contacted before any meetings are scheduled without my permission."

Kakucho nodded, swallowing the saliva that had been pooling in his mouth. "Yes, boss. I understand."

Mikey moved in his chair, fixing his posture ever so slightly. "We would contact you if you ever picked our fucking calls up. I don't even know why you have that thing if you never use it."

"I love your input on our meetings, Manjiro. It's always so..." She waved her hand around as if trying to find the word. "Opportune," she said with a smile. A different kind of smile that only he knew. The same type of smile she used to give him when he teased her when they were kids. The 'continue-this-and-you-are-fucked' smile. How he had missed it. Nowadays, Maya had turned cold toward everyone, always wearing that same faint, doll-like smile on her lips. Mikey wouldn't have minded her change of personality if it hadn't affected their relationship too.

Manjiro.

Mikey never thought the sound of his name would hurt his ears that much. He hated it the most when it was coming out of her lips, and that was precisely why she persisted in using it. No matter how many times they fight about it, she made up her mind twelve years ago and hasn't changed it ever since.

"Sanzu." Maya looked at the man whose voice hadn't been heard since the moment she had walked in. "You're quiet today. Surely you, of all people, must have some input as well."

He bowed his head before speaking. "Boss, I have found the names, locations, and general occupations of the informants."

"Ah!" Maya's eyes lit up and she looked at Sanzu, smiling from ear to ear. "Finally, some good news."

Kakucho frowned at the comment.

"Ma'am, if I may." Haitani Ran stood up and fixed his jacket before making his way toward her, his expensive suit ruffling a little as he moved. She watched his eyes, the faintest flicker of desire dissipating before he handed her a sheet of paper containing the names and addresses of the informants.

She looked back up at the tall man, as he asked for permission to speak. A silly gimmick he had done since the very first time they had ever spoken, nearly thirteen years ago. Though, back then it had been to poke fun at her. Tease her. Get a reaction out of her. Anything that could satisfy the need he had for her to notice him.

Nowadays, it has turned into a subconscious habit of his.

She nodded, granting him his wish.

He smiled. A charming smile that left every girl melting at his feet. Every girl except for her, who had never indulged in his flirtatious behavior. This only made Haitani Ran even keener on trying to woo her, which had been proven much harder of a task than he could ever hope for.

"Haruchiyo, Rindo, and I have collected this information so we may better plan a way to gather the informants, and eventually bring them to justice."

"The Holy Trinity," mused Mikey, sipping more syrupy liquid from his cup.

"When will we take action?" She demanded.

"Whenever we have confirmation from our spies that they feel safe enough to let their guard down," said Rindo. "That's when we corner them."

"And that's...?" She pressed on.

"Soon." Sanzu smiled at her, his pupils dilating even more. "They are starting to settle down. They think they can hide from you, boss." He giggled to himself.

As they discussed the details, Mikey played with a pack of cigarettes that he had stolen from Maya. His fingers ran through the edges of the pack, stopping at the lid, which he flicked up and down, one time after the other. The crease started to bend and crack under the pressure, tearing at the edges, but he didn't stop. He had never understood why she smoked. It was a killing habit, but she never seemed to mind. At first, Mikey hated the smell. He couldn't even be around it, but he grew used to it. Surprisingly, Maya herself never smelled of cigarette smoke, which was a relief to him.

"Manjiro. My cigarettes, please."

Still carefully reading through the information, Maya stretched out her hand as a parent would toward Mikey.

"Huh?"

"My pack." She insisted, flashing the scar on her palm ever so slightly. "You have it?"

"Dunno whatcha talking about." Mikey pouted.

"Sano Manjiro." She slammed the sheet of paper down. "I am sick and tired of your childish behavior. Just give it back, please."

With a smile, Mikey looked at her, taking the pack out of his pocket and placing it in her hand. "I was doing you a favor, Maya. Those things give you cancer, you know?"

Maya clicked her tongue as she snatched the pack from Mikey. She lit up a cigarette and closed her eyes, breathing in the toxic fumes and releasing a halo of smoke above her head before opening her eyes again.

"You get even more insufferable when you drink." She took another drag out of her cigarette.

The sound of Ran clearing his throat snatched Maya's attention back to him. "Boss, may I also add that Kakucho's info has correlations with ours?"

"It does?" Kakucho exclaimed, looking up from his papers.

"Yes. I have noticed a correlation between the informants and some of the Tojima family's businesses. Their schedules, their meeting places, and even the whorehouses they use all belong to the Tojima family."

"Well, shit. I didn't know this." Sanzu glanced over Kakucho's papers, which he handed to him, and in turn, began to pass around the table until they landed on Mikey's hands. He analyzed the papers and compared the schedules and locations. Mikey looked over at Maya and gave her the papers. Ran was correct. They were connected.

"Well done, Ran. Excellent work, as always," she said after she finished analyzing the papers as well.

With a smile, he bowed before excusing himself back to his seat.

"Kakucho." He shot his head up toward his boss. "You too. Excellent work, all of you."

Something was bothering Mikey. While he was analyzing the papers, a name stood out to him. Not because he recognized it, but because it wasn't filled in. He leaned over Maya's shoulder and pointed at the redacted name. "Why is this name not filled in?" he asked, to the surprise of everyone in the room.

Maya combed through the list again and noticed a redacted name Mikey was referring to.

"We don't have any information about that person yet," Ran explained, fixing his jacket once more.

"Whoever the person is, they are incredibly careful. Only meet up where they know they won't be seen," added Rindo.

"Possibly because he knows what he is doing," suggested Mikey, pensive, leaning back against his armchair. "Like he has done this before."

"We are currently working to find more info about the mysterious person."

Mikey frowned. That had never happened to them before. Normally, Ran and Rindo were good at finding people. The best. Why were the brothers having trouble with just one informant?

"Whoever it is, he must be good at what he does since you have no trail on him yet," he tried, but the brothers simply nodded, and the conversation ended there.

Mikey reached for Sanzu's pocket and took out his pocket watch. Despite the other man's complaints, Mikey pressed the small button that opened the lid and saw the pointers marked half past eight.

The meeting was coming to an end.

"Boss, before ending this meeting, may I also add something?" Takeomi asked from the edge of the table. Maya gestured in agreement, and he proceeded. "Even though what Sanzu said may be true, we should act defensively. This is one of the biggest families in the Shibuya prefecture. We may have worked with them in the past, but they are quite cunning if you haven't forgotten."

"I never forget." Her eyes glistened under the fading sun.

"Exactly." Takeomi flickered his cigar into the ashtray in front of him. "We worked nice and fair with them, and now they are trying to turn on us."

"A friend has revealed itself to be a foe," Kokonoi commented, amused.

Takeomi pointed his cigarette at Kokonoi in agreement. "Therefore, we must play smarter. We should craft a plan that can blindside them."

"How can you blindside an organization as big as them?" asked Kakucho.

"Not as big as ours," pointed Takeomi back.

"Use their men against them," Mochizuki Kanji suggested.

"But how?" Rindo banged his fits against the table. "I'm willing to bet those motherfuckers are sold for life. They won't budge, no matter what type of torture they are put under."

"Are you sure, Rindo?"

Their boss's question took them out of their little discussion.

Maya smiled, but not at them or anyone else in particular. She smiled past them, past that room, and past that mansion. She smiled at the men she had tortured in the past. The men that swore up and down would never talk, but she somehow had made them scream instead. She smiled at those same men that, after they had turned against their families, she had them killed and placed at their doorsteps.

Rindo bowed his head to her in acknowledgment. "I'm sure you will do whatever it takes, ma'am."

Yamazaki Miyako could do whatever it took to win against her enemies. And she was perfect at it.

Every. Single. Fucking. Time.

[2018, JUNE 10]

3 MONTHS LATER

2:00 a.m.

Mikey hated making plans. He despised the meetings even more. He found it all to be mind-numbingly dull. He couldn't bear the constant talk of money, the Yakuza, traitors, informants, current businesses, future businesses, and God knows what else. He didn't give a single fuck about any of that. Those aspects of the organization had always fallen on the shoulders of his colleagues, which they were aware of. And, if he had to be honest, the only reason he kept attending any meetings was due to Maya alone. Not only because she would get mad— which she certainly would —but because he wanted to see her. He had to see her. At times, to appease his mind and make sure nothing could happen to her in his absence. Others, to look at her beautiful eyes a little longer.

"Any news?" Maya had asked them at that day's meeting, but this time they had nothing to report back.

"We are at a loss here, Boss." Haitani Rindo gritted his teeth with embarrassment. "There is no way for us to locate this fucker."

"Think outside the box, boys." She had smiled at them. "Maybe it's not a single person."

"What do you mean, ma'am?" Kakucho had asked, confused by her suggestion.

She had slammed her folder on the table. "Report back to me when you have more information," she added.

Today's meeting has been a success, according to Maya, who whispered it to him before she got up to leave. Their eyes met, and she placed her hand on his shoulder. It had been one of the smallest, most pitiful forms of contact he had ever received, yet it had been enough to send Mikey into a strong enough loop to make him attempt to drown those feelings in alcohol, later that night.

In their small common room, Bonten was discussing what steps to take to bring down the informants, for the millionth time.

Three months.

They had been doing that for three months, and Mikey was beginning to lose his patience.

Cross-legged, he sat at the edge of a big, L-shaped sofa, holding a cup of what could be either water or straight vodka. He couldn't tell anymore, and he didn't care anyway. All he could think about was Maya's brilliant eyes and how the sophisticated suit she had worn that day clung to her skin and carved out her curves. Or the sweet, floral scent she left as she walked past him.

Mikey cursed whoever was in charge of his thoughts and drank some more.

Maya rarely stood for long these days. She always had something else to do and rushed every meeting they had. Most times, she heard what her members had to say and left much quicker than she had arrived. Today's meeting had beaten the record for their shortest and most enigmatic meeting so far, which left Bonten with more questions, and even more work than they had before.

"That fucking bastard is good at hiding." Rindo rustled his papers, passing through them one after another. "There is no trace of him anywhere."

"Boss is getting impatient," reminded Kakucho. He was right. Today's meeting had been shorter than most due to Maya's growing impatience with them. They should have had something— anything — by now but remained stuck with the same information they had presented to her three months ago.

"There's accounts of him being on one side of town and the opposite all in the same day, just a few hours apart." Ran showed his computer screen to his brother sitting next to him, who watched the map with the locations of the informants from the past couple of months. "Is there a possibility this 'mysterious guy' could be a group of people, all working together?"

Rindo raised an eyebrow at his brother's suggestion. "Multiple people?"

"Wasn't that what the Boss suggested today?"

"Could be…" Rindo mused.

"How didn't we notice this before?" Kakucho asked, pacing around the room.

"Haven't these guys been after our asses for months now?" Kokonoi played with his pocket knife. "How haven't we gotten a lead on them yet? Surely they can't be that good."

"But they are." Kakucho let his body flop beside Kokonoi, crossing his legs. "If we are talking about a group here, there's a possibility they have strong connections within the crime scene. They know what they are doing."

"Just like Boss said."

Kakucho nodded.

"Exactly like she said," remarked Ran. "I have been tracing their movements for months and Boss was able to capture this small detail in just a few minutes."

"Impressive," acknowledged Rindo, absentminded.

"Actually…" Kakucho exchanged a look with Mikey from his side of the couch. "It was Mikey that noticed."

"Really?" Ran seemed intrigued, yet amused by the revelation.

Mikey dropped his head on his hand. "Don't rope me into this. I don't give a shit."

"But you helped us," Ran said.

"Looks like some people haven't been doing their job correctly, so Mikey had to do it for them," taunted Kokonoi, the people he was referring to scoffed at him.

"Instead of you dealing with our finances all day, we would appreciate you getting your hands dirty for once, Koko." Ran stopped typing on his computer to look at his friend, delivering the proposition with a pleasant smile.

Kokonoi rolled his eyes. "I already have so much on my plate as it is." He checked his reflection on the shining, silver blade, before stuffing it back in his pocket. "No, thank you," he added with a sneer.

"If you have nothing to offer, then don't comment on our work, asshole." Sanzu entered the room after finishing a call with one of their spies. The guy had tried to contact the informants today, and they were trying to trace back his steps.

"I do have a lot to offer." Kokonoi placed his hand on his chest, pretending to be offended. "My lovely company and commentary, for example."

"Your commentary is just what we need right now." The youngest Haitani sibling blinked slowly at Kokonoi, bemused.

"Besides," Kokonoi continued. "I would love to see you guys sit down and try to make deals all day, every day, and be able to score as many as I do."

Sanzu scoffed as he sat down beside Mikey, placing his arm behind his back. "Like it's a hard thing to do."

"It's harder than you'd think." Kokonoi fired back. "All you do is find and torture people, which Boss does most of the time, anyway. Why does she need you to do it?"

The room fell silent. The Haitani brothers mirrored each other's malicious smiles, as Sanzu lit a cigarette and looked at Mikey. Luckily, the latter man hadn't been paying much attention to the conversation until then and was far too drunk to care either way.

"Sometimes you don't think much before speaking, do you?" Mikey declared before standing up, leaving his colleagues and his empty cup behind.

He had to concentrate on walking in a straight line, which made him even more sure that he needed to care for his drunk ass before dealing with any of their bullshit. Besides, it was past two in the morning, and he desperately needed his alone time.

"Boss won't be pleased to hear you didn't care for the plan. She might punish us," reminded Ran from across the room. "Again," he added to spite him.

Mikey halted and glanced at him over his shoulder, leaning with one hand on the doorframe. His vision was unstable, but he could see the outline of Haitani Ran's teasing grin in the distance. Mikey knew this game all too well. Ran had been doing the same little charade for the past decade, and while Mikey had let it get to him in the past, he wouldn't give him the satisfaction of a reaction now. Not in his precarious state. Not even if it would give Mikey the adrenaline rush he had been so desperately craving.

"Trust me, Ran. I have other ways of pleasing her." He watched as Ran turned his attention back to his dimly lit screen again, his expression falling strangely neutral for the taller man.

Mikey rolled his eyes. "All of you bore me to death. Goodnight."

"You're harsh, Mikey," Kokonoi managed to say before Mikey banged the door shut.

At around four in the morning, Mikey realized, no matter how much he twisted and turned on his bed, he wouldn't be able to sleep that night. When this happened— which had already turned into a routine —he went for late-night rides on his bike. He loved the sensation of the night breeze brushing against his hair and clothes. How it's just him and him alone driving at an exorbitant speed in the middle of the highway. But he hadn't sobered up yet. He could be reckless, but he knew better than to drive while drunk. He had almost lost someone to that, and he wouldn't fall into the same mistake as her.

His bike could wait for another time.

With a grunt, he opened his eyes and was met with Maya looking back at him. Soft skin adorned with tattoos, her face soaked with tears, and dark wings enveloping her delicate figure: The painting never failed to give Mikey a scare whenever he woke up late at night. He had taken it from Maya's childhood home and had kept it in his room ever since, which granted him Maya's eyes to stare back at him every time he opened his. Anger and sorrow were all he could see in them. Nowadays, her eyes rarely transpired any of those emotions, if any at all, but he still wished to see them. He still wished to invoke those emotions on her, even if it meant getting 'punished' afterward.

"Man, I'm so fucked." He moaned as he got up from his bed and walked toward the door.

He hadn't changed into his pajamas or any other form of 'sleeping-appropriate' clothing before throwing his intoxicated body on the bed. His breath reeked of alcohol, his head was throbbing from the incoming hangover, and he was getting way too old for this lifestyle.

As he walked down the long corridors of the mansion, all he heard was the echoing sound of his flip-flops hitting the ground. He stopped, looking out for someone who might still be awake. He assumed his colleagues had left right after he did, but that didn't stop him from slowing his pace down as he passed by.

It didn't take long for Mikey to reach the other wing of the vast building, where her room was. He pushed the door open, careful not to wake her up. It was pitch black, with the faintest bit of moonlight peeking through the crack of the heavy, opaque curtains. As his eyes slowly adjusted to the dark, he noticed the covers move up and down. That was enough invitation to walk in, not worrying about closing the door behind him. He walked toward the curtains and parted them, the shower of light hitting him all at once. Outside, a view of their beautiful garden could be seen, with the snowy mountains serving as a background, almost like a painting. He understood why Maya insisted on her room being where it was. This view alone was nearly enough to make him forget the terrible things they do. It was precisely the kind of thing Maya would want to see every day.

He looked back at the sleeping figure on the bed. Maya lay on her side facing the window, with covers up to her neck, allowing the moon to shine over her delicate face. She seemed so peaceful and calm in her sleep; so innocent. To think Maya was the only person left in his life gave Mikey a certain uncomfortable comfort, not even he could explain. He couldn't bear the thought of losing her, yet was met with her indifference every day. Mean looks and even meaner words tore him down more than Maya could ever imagine. Most days he wondered why she even tried to stay by his side. Why did she choose to deal with him every day if it so clearly seemed like a burden to her?

She would be better off alone, she had yelled at him one day, many years ago. She had apologized immediately after, but it had left an awfully bitter taste in Mikey's mouth to this day because he knew she had meant it.

All she wanted was to be left alone. It was the way things were since they were kids. She found comfort in the quietude of her person, preferring to stay away from others as much as she could.

"I can't deal with them," she had confessed to him one night after a big storm.

June 2000: It was the middle of the rainy season and the days were cold, the nights were hot, and Mikey was spending the night at Maya's house.

They had been laying on her bed, watching the rain pour outside when Maya said it.

"What?" He had asked.

He had looked at her. She was still watching the rain, and Black Sabbath played softly in the background. He remembered feeling like he was leaving in a dream at that moment. Nothing seemed real and neither did the girl laying beside him.

"People," she had said after a while.

"What about people?"

She had sighed and looked at him. At that moment, he thought he was about to die. How could a girl be so pretty and not be completely made up? He had never felt such a thing as a 'crush' before; he found them to be trivial and a waste of his time. But Maya wasn't a crush. Maya was an extension of him, but he had been far too young to understand that at the time.

"I don't like people, Mikey. They scare me. I scare them. I can never interact with them in a way they understand. I'm either too cold, too warm, too distant, or too much. It's all…Too much. All the time. I just wish they'd all just leave me alone."

"I don't feel that way when you're talking to me," he had said.

Lightheaded. That's how he had felt. He was drunk before he even knew what being drunk felt like.

"I don't feel that way when I'm talking to you either."

And then she smiled.

Oh, that smile.

How he cherished that smile.

But in the end, all she wanted was to be left alone. Mikey understood it at the time, but as an adult, he finally got what Maya truly meant.

If he hadn't been so selfish, Maya wouldn't be where she was today. She could have had a good life, but Mikey had to drag her down the rabbit hole, and there they fell. They had been falling for eighteen years and none of them seemed to notice a thing.

Mikey's heart clamped up in his chest. He looked around and located an armchair in the corner of the room, facing toward the bed, in which he promptly sat, clenching his shirt. Was he having a heart attack? Were his dark impulses back? For years, he hadn't felt this feeling of pure…Dread.

"It's late, Manjiro," Maya said from the bed, eyes closed. "You should get some rest."

"Maya?" Mikey had to ask out loud, unsure if his sleep-deprived, intoxicated mind was playing tricks on him.

Maya sat up on the bed, looking at the moon. The covers fell, exposing her sheer nightgown. The tattoo all Bonten's members have peeked through the fabric of the dress. "Next week is the 'big day', you know?"

Mikey waited for an explanation, but she remained quietly watching the view outside.

"You don't remember?" She asked, concerned.

Mikey shook his head, still shaken from being caught in her room late at night. Like a teenager, he looked away from her. He was shocked she didn't yell at him or throw him out of the room, promising hours of torture the next day. Instead, she sat on her bed, hands clasped over her covered lap, not looking at him.

"On March 15th, we made a promise, twelve years ago."

Mikey chewed on the date for a while. For a few seconds nothing came, but the image of a big tree popped into his mind, along with a group of friends digging a hole and making a promise to come back twelve years later, on Toman's anniversary.

The reunion was in less than two weeks.

"I have been trying to prepare myself for this for the past couple of months…But, I don't know…" She swam around in her thoughts, not speaking to Mikey himself, but rather sharing her thoughts with the air around her. "I have been putting it off for so long, but I think this time I'm ready."

"You have been out a lot, lately," he tried to change the subject because he knew what was coming. "It's out of character for you."

"Do you remember, Manjiro?" She asked again, and Mikey noted a spark of sadness in her tone.

Sadness? Since when did she care?

"No," he lied.

"Nevermind," she dismissed and lay back in her bed, facing opposite him. "I knew you'd forget. You forget every single year, anyway."

He wanted to tell her he knew; that he did remember it every year. How could he forget? How could he possibly forget them? The people that made him and the people that destroyed him too? How could he forget any of that?

He wanted to tell her to have a little faith in him. To be kinder to him, like she used to be when they were younger. Like she was in the summer of the year two-thousand.

But, like a coward, he remained silent.

"Close the curtains and the door on your way out," she demanded, never once sparing a single glance in his direction. "And don't come to my room at night ever again."

But both knew he would, as he had for the past ten years.