Chapter 8 - Sweetness And The Sorrow

Kurt made his peace with the fact that ten sets of eyes would be staring at him until he spoke again. It was what happened when you draw attention to yourself during a discussion about a stalker.

"I don't have many details, but someone's been following me."

Beth frowned. "Kurt, I don't know if you've noticed, but someone's been following all of us."

Kurt shook his head. "Not just tonight. For the past six months or so. It started so small that I didn't even recognise it for a few weeks. Little things. Like…folding back certain pages in my textbooks, reorganising my locker, stuff like that. Things that I wouldn't have even really noticed if I wasn't so prissy."

Emily chuckled.

"But I'm willing to bet that this person knew all of that about me beforehand. It started to escalate, they starting leaving little notes, first posted through my locker, then delivered to my house."

Jess gasped under her breath.

"They rewrote some of the lyrics on my sheet music, they changed the screensaver on my laptop, things were just pointed enough to get my attention. Once I started looking for things, I noticed it got a whole lot bigger than that. Whoever this is knew exactly where I was going to be and when I was gonna be there. Chris, you remember your house party last month?"

Chris frowned. "Yeah, you left early."

"They sent me a picture from my bedroom. I knew it was live because I zoomed in and looked at the calendar. Sure enough, that day's date. I went home and found nothing. That is, until I looked under my pillow and found a bag with a few locks of my hair."

"Oh my god," Hannah whispered.

"Wait," Josh mumbled. "If this has been happening to for months, then why the fuck haven't any of us noticed? Or why didn't you say something?"

Kurt was surprised by the interrogatory tone, but Josh's sheepish smile was apology enough. "One of the messages I got was a threat against you guys if I said anything. They said they had things on you."

"Bullshit," Emily crowed.

"Em," Matt hissed, nodding to Kurt, whose arms were wrapped around himself. He had even eschewed Mike's firm hold as he recounted his story.

"I'm not saying he's lying. I'm just saying that's not the reason he didn't say anything to us."

Kurt blinked quickly and swallowed. "Explain."

Emily shrugged. "You're scared. Kurt, you need to understand that that is a perfectly normal reaction. It's okay to be vulnerable sometimes. I understand not wanting to say anything, but don't make out like you were doing it protect us. You might've been, but that wasn't the ruling reason. It's fear and don't try to make out like it's anything else."

Kurt appraised her, slightly amused, lips pulling down. "You're right. Thanks."

"Anytime," Emily dipped her head.

"So you think the same person followed us here?" Mike pressed, eager to know all the details to ensure Kurt's safety.

Kurt nodded. "It would make sense. Given how close we are, this person is bound to have kept tabs on you guys too."

Each on of them reflected on how that made them feel.

"The Game was quite an ingenious plan, actually. Not only would it turn us against each other, but it being my stalker would turn you guys against me. I'm the reason Sam lost a finger, I'm the reason this happened."

Sam scoffed. "Now it's my turn to call bullshit. Kurt, you're a lot of wonderful things, but a martyr act doesn't become you. It's absolutely horrible what has been happening to you, but blaming yourself for that whole fucked up mess is idiocy of the highest order and quite beneath you."

Kurt held himself tighter. "I guess it's Calling Kurt On His Bullshit Variety Hour. Anyone else want a go?"

Mike sighed. "They're right though, Kurt."

"I know, it's just frustrating, nobody has ever made me feel like this and I don't even who it is. I hate feeling powerless."

Josh bit his lip. "Well I know how we could find out who it is."

Everyone leaned forward, curious. As Josh went to speak, Beth's eyes lit up.

"There's 24/7 security footage down by the cable car. It's the only way in, so whoever it is is bound to show up on the cameras. Apparently, the lodge was built on top of an old mental hospital, so my grandfather decided to keep the cameras going."

Kurt brushed himself down, steeling himself for his next action. "Then I'll go and check the footage."

Mike nodded. "I'll come too."

Sam stood up, crossing the room. "Guys, this is crazy. We don't have to go right now. We're safe in here for tonight as long as nobody leaves the room. Even with two of you, the weather is insane out there. We'll just wait it out until morning, sleep in shifts, and leave first thing. We can check the footage before we go and then go straight to the police."

Kurt smiled sadly. "With what evidence, Sam? Your detached finger? They'll know that we were drinking up here, they'll boil it down to teenage stupidity. Besides, I have no other evidence of this person following me."

"Kurt…"

"No, I'm going," Kurt shot back. "This person has been poisoning my life for months now and I've been powerless to stop it. Now they've hurt my friends, irreparably. You're missing a finger. I have to go. Maybe that's what they want and it's an ambush but I'm a capable fighter and I can end this."

He turned to Mike. "But you're not coming."

Mike gaped. "Kurt, I said I'd protect you through anything."

"I know, and you'll have ample chances to do that once we get back. But if you're up there with me, I'm gonna lose focus. And I can't have you getting hurt."

Mike clenched his jaw, knowing he wasn't going to sway Kurt on this. "Well someone has to go with you."

"Not it," Emily snapped. She looked at Kurt unabashedly. "Sorry, Kurt. I'm cold."

Kurt grinned. "Not a problem."

"I'll come," Chris stood and went over to join Kurt, nudging Mike back to his seat.

"Chris!" Ashley cried.

"No, Ash, someone's gotta go and it's gonna be me."

"Why you?"

Chris sighed. "Everyone's been through hell tonight, but least of all me. So I had my diary exposed that led to me finding a new relationship. So what? Everyone else has been put through the ringer. It's time for me to step up. Besides, I'm the least helpful to have around in case of an emergency."

Ashley swallowed a sob. "I don't like it. But I understand."

Kurt eyed Chris dangerously. "Chris, are you sure? I remember the way, my phone's fully charged, I don't mind doing this alone."

Chris elbowed him gently. "It'll be fun."

Kurt wanted to hug Chris for trying to boost morale, but he settled for a contented nod.

Chris's eyes found Mike. "I'll keep him safe."

Kurt searched Josh and Ashley's eyes deeply. "Likewise. Nothing's getting past us. We'd better go though."

Chris nodded as they each ran to their significant others and said their goodbyes. They were fairly confident that nothing would go wrong, but you never know.

Kurt and Chris shut the door behind them and instantly tensed up at the raging blizzard that bitterly swept across the mountains.

Chris chuckled behind his coat. "I know it's dumb but maybe we should hold hands."

Kurt smiled. "I'm flattered Chris, but we're both in hour-long relationships. I wouldn't want to jeopardise that so early on."

Chris shook his head fondly as they walked. "We can't walk and hold each other for warmth at the same time. Skin the skin contact is the best way to do that while remaining mobile."

Kurt chuckled and slipped his icy hand in Chris' own. He squeezed it for good measure. "Thanks for stepping up for me."

Chris grinned. "It was the least I could do after the way you've handled everything tonight. And everything you've gone through. I'm mad as hell that you never said anything."

"I'm just a bossy bitch. And Emily was right, I was just too scared. This person already had too much access to my life. Speaking it aloud made it seem real and even more dangerous than before. I should've though. It was dumb to keep it a secret."

"Yes…yes it was," Chris nodded. "Now that we're literally walking through a snowstorm away from everyone else, how are you doing?"

"In what way do you mean?"

"About what Hannah wrote…"

Kurt huffed. "I'm fine now, she's entitled to her opinion, I probably shouldn't have put on her blast like that, I know she wrote those things out of anger."

"No, you did only what was necessary. You spoke calmly, you didn't yell, I probably would've punched her. You just asked her what made her think those things. It's was the most diplomatic thing I've ever seen."

"Only because I didn't blame her. Like I said to Mike earlier, I've thought all those things about myself at one point or another. And I've been where she is, I know the resentment and the bitterness of the situation."

"Still though, you'd done nothing wrong."

"Neither did Patty."

Chris dipped his head. "Fair point."

"So tell me about your polyamory."

"Can I be honest with you?"

Kurt smirked. "I'd prefer it."

"I'm fucking terrified. I've never been in a relationship and neither has Ash. To suddenly thrust into this triangle with no experience…I can't help but think that it'll go wrong somehow."

"I won't pretend to understand it, but I know how all of you feel about each other."

"You weren't surprised earlier. I swear, you're like a wizard when it comes to sniffing out personal info."

"It made sense to me in a way," Kurt surmised. "I knew that Ash had been falling hard for you, I knew that Josh was into Ash, and it only clicked into place when I learned about your diary. I probably should've but I never even considered the idea of all three of you being together."

"A narrow mind begets ignorance."

"Idiot," Kurt said playfully. "I am rooting for you guys though."

"Not mad that I took Josh from you?" Chris winked through the snow that coated his face.

Kurt smirked. "That depends, is there room for four?"

"Not Mike?"

"He'd only slow us down."

"I think we would come to some kind of arrangement. Ash wouldn't be a problem?"

"A narrow mind begets ignorance," Kurt purred.

A shiver shot down Chris' spine that had nothing to do with the piercing cold. "You realise now I'll never stop picturing you banging Ashley."

Kurt shrugged. "That's your problem, buddy. If it's hot, it's hot right?"

"Oh it's hot," Chris agreed jovially. "That said, if you ever want an audience when you and Mike start fucking, let me know."

"Maybe we should sell tickets."

"We'll start scheming later when my balls aren't about to fall off. Besides, we're almost there."

Back at the Lodge, Mike found that his head kept turning towards the door, expecting Kurt and Chris to walk through it. He knew that the irrational part of his mind would be screaming that something bad had happened, courtesy of his father's rampant paranoia that had been instilled in him from an early age. He felt a gentle nudge on his thigh.

Matt smiled at him. "They'll be alright."

Mike nodded. "I know. But thanks."

"Still wish you'd gone?"

Mike bit his lip. "I wish I hadn't folded so easily. But I know Kurt when he uses that tone, there's no winning with him."

"Oh I understand that," Matt chuckled, looking across at Emily who was deep in conversation with Ashley. Their shared trauma had blossomed a new avenue in their friendship and that was something Matt enjoyed witnessing. "Kurt and Emily are scarily similar, once they've got their minds set on something, you might as well just give up entirely."

"I'd just feel better knowing that I could protect him. I trust Chris, of course I do, but I just…I think…"

"I know," Matt smiled. "I'd feel the same. Hell, I do feel the same. I probably should've volunteered instead."

He eyed Mike carefully.

"You'd have trusted me, right?"

Mike sighed. "Is this about the Game?"

Matt shrugged. "Partly. Kurt and Em have both already talked to me about it and I understand Sam's answer. Kurt pointed out that she and I aren't particularly close, despite spending all of our time in the same group. It's something I know I need to remedy, but it makes sense now."

"Matt, I'd trust you to protect Kurt. I'd trust you to protect me. Actually kinda glad you're here."

"Kurt's been gone for ten minutes and you're already looking for other company. Whatever would he say."

Mike rolled his eyes fondly. "Oh you wanna play? You know where our room is." Mike winked.

"I don't think Kurt could handle both of us," Matt smirked.

Mike flexed proudly. "You're damn right, man."

Their banter was put to an immediate halt by Beth, who was once again standing and pacing around the room.

"Just because Kurt and Chris have gone to the cable car doesn't mean we can stop theorising."

"What good is that going to do, Beth?" Hannah wondered. "They'll be back with an answer and then we'll know. We'll just spin ourselves in circles."

Beth whirled around. "Well it's not like we're going to play a game to pass the time!"

Josh grinned devilishly. "I'm up for a second round."

Everyone gaped at him.

"Too soon," he backed off defensively. "Got it."

Jess sighed loudly. "Is nobody going to focus on the fact that our best friend has been being stalked for six months and not a single one of us knew anything about it?"

Emily shrugged. "Kurt's a really private person. You know he doesn't let anyone know when he's hurting."

Sam's brows furrowed. "Yeah, but we should've known. Maybe this person knew to only get to him when he'd be alone, but there had to have been signs."

Mike scowled. "There weren't. I would've known."

"Why? Because you've been his boyfriend for two hours?" Beth snapped. "Accept it, Mike. We missed it. All of us did. The sooner you let that sink in, the better."

Mike opened his mouth to argue, but Matt placing a soothing hand on his knee. Mike just clenched his jaw and looked away. Beth folded her arms grumpily.

Ashley shook her head. "Right, I want everyone to join hands."

"Ash—."

"No questions, just do it."

One by one, coming to the realisation that Ashley taking control of a situation was unprecedented and therefore worth going along with, the group locked hands, feeling their anxieties fade just by feeling like they had somebody next to them.

"Good," Ashley nodded. "Now, I want you all to take a deep, centring breath. In for four, hold for six, out for eight."

They all complied, feeling the air rush into their lungs, letting the pent up tension linger before feeling their chests deflate as the air was expelled from their bodies.

"And again," Ashley instructed.

The group repeated the motion a total of three times before everyone, even Mike, felt relaxed and calm. Ashley sat back with a small smile as she watched everyone return to their senses.

"Doesn't everyone feel better?"

Beth nodded. She immediately turned to Mike. "I'm sorry, Mike. I'm just…this whole night has been…"

"I know," Mike nodded. "I can't wait to get back home."

"It's safe to say I won't be coming back here anytime soon," Sam sighed. "It's a shame, I really liked it up here."

Josh dipped his head.

Hannah coughed. "I'll tell Dad to start putting in a contingency plan for the cable car, it's a stupid idea to deactivate it until dawn."

"At least now we'll get to find out who's been harassing Kurt and put a stop to it."

"Put a stop to it…how exactly?" Jess whispered.

Mike shrugged. "Easy. I'll kill him."

"Think about what you're saying," Sam warned. "You're gonna willingly take a human life?"

Mike's eyes narrowed dangerously. "If I have to."