"So this is where Quinn works?"
Brittany and Santana walked hand in hand into Queen's Coffee. They had arrived in Atlanta an hour earlier, dragging suitcases, to spend two weeks with their friends. This impromptu vacation would allow Santana to prepare Beca for the judgment that was fast approaching. "Sorry, ma'am." A young man apologized because he had pushed Santana to queue a little further away.
The cafe was crowded with students craving sugar, backpacks full of homework. Santana hadn't planned to arrive at the end of class time, but she was happy to see how well Quinn's business was doing.
"Look, Q. is serving." Brittany pointed out. Indeed, the efficient blonde prepared milkshake after milkshake without paying attention to the faces she was serving. The waiters around her were busy placing the various orders on the trays and serving them in the dining room. Under Quinn's orders, the kitchen and bar operated in beautiful synchrony without any food on the floor or people jostling each other. "I forgot how scary she was when she went into captain mode." Brittany whispered, amazed.
Suddenly, the two young women felt arms surround their shoulders and a head passed between them. "Don't tell me that after all this time, you're still surprised to see her leading a team?"
"She never bossed me around." Santana contradicted with a raised eyebrow. "No, of course not. You followed her in her lousy plans without batting an eyelid..." Brittany turned to take the smaller of the two brunettes into her arms and lift her off the ground. "Rach', I missed you!" Rachel laughed and hugged the blonde as tightly as she could. Back on her feet, the brunette gestured towards Santana but changed her mind in front of her crossed arms.
"Did you finally come out of your room? The Hispanic woman's black eyes had always intimidated Rachel, even more so since they had learned to respect each other. Rachel valued Santana's friendship more than she would like to admit. Sheepishly, she looked down. Rachel Berry didn't look down at anyone except her mother and Santana Lopez. "San', that's enough! Leave her alone. She needs a friend, not a lawyer to lecture her." Brittany grumbled.
The lawyer analyzed the brunette from head to toe. Rachel seemed to blame herself but to feel a little better since the last time they had seen each other. Brittany nudged her partner, who rolled her eyes before spreading her arms wide. "Come on, Berry. I missed you too." The brunette smiled shyly as she approached. She whispered apologies in her ears. Santana squeezed her a little tighter. "It's okay. You scared me. Don't do it again." Rachel pulled away and nodded at her. Few seconds later, she resumed her usual cheerful demeanor. "Do you want to visit the back of the restaurant? I'll let Quinn know you've arrived."
The three young women pushed past the line and slipped around the side of the bar. Rachel intercepted Quinn with a hand on the shoulder. In the surrounding hubbub, neither Santana nor Brittany had heard what Rachel had said, but they could see Quinn's face light up when she looked at them. "She's going to join us." Rachel explained, directing them towards the office. "Here we'll be more at peace." She sat down in the armchair and her two friends took the chairs opposite the desk, without letting go of each other's hands. Rachel noticed the gesture and smiled wistfully. Some things would never change. "Did you have a good flight?"
"Yes, San' slept the whole time."
"Hey!"
"Oh, don't lie, it's true!"
"I wasn't going to say the opposite but you don't have to tell it!" Rachel smiled brightly. She really missed her friends. Quinn entered at the same time with a cloth in her hands. "Sorry, it's rush hour!" She went to greet their friends with a hug each then went to the other side of the office. Rachel stood up to kiss her. Quinn took her place and the brunette sat on her lap naturally. "It's going well, it seems." Santana enthused. "Did you manage to feed all the local teenagers?"
"Not all of them. Some people prefer to eat vegetables." Quinn joked. "What did I miss?"
"Nothing. Santana slept the whole way her." Rachel reiterated. The brunette in question raised her hands to the sky and everyone started laughing at her dramatic side.
Chloe pulled on the hooks of her brace roughly. Her hands were already shaking with apprehension. After several rehabilitation sessions of bending her leg, unfolding her leg, strengthening the area around her knee, stretching the ligaments that had been cracked, Chloe could finally try to stand without a brace.
A month and a half had passed since the accident and, although the fractures in her femur were still felt in the cold weather, the doctors were categorical. Chloe was ready. Beca, who was with her, stood on her left side to help her get up. A rehabilitation caregiver, Antonio, was on the other side of Chloe. The three of them moved slowly towards the two uneven bars where Chloe supported herself with both hands, Antonio's arms securely around her abdomen. "You'll get there, Chloe," Beca encouraged.
The redhead wasn't so sure. Obviously, she had been walking without crutches for weeks now and she had gained considerable muscle according to her physiotherapist. She wanted to succeed in taking this famous step. But she knew how failure could weight in the balance. If she were to drag out her rehabilitation, the bills would pile up. Chloe couldn't afford to fail.
"Come on, Chloe. You can try a step while keeping your hands on the bars, for the moment." Antonio indicated, now in front of her to catch her in case of a fall. Chloe nodded, looking determined. She was going to get there. It was just a step. She knew how to dance entire choreographies. One step was just a habit. She threw her foot forward while keeping her hands clenched on the bars. Her sneaker hit the foam mattress. She leaned on her leg carefully then exhaled. She had succeeded. The other leg remained. Carefully, with her back and arms braced, she placed her injured leg next to the other and let her weight spread across both. It held. It was painful and beads of sweat dripped from her forehead but she stood.
Relieved, Chloe relaxed her attention and the fall came without warning. Antonio caught her just in time, amid Beca's worries. "Are you doing well? Did you hurt yourself?" The brunette was very distraught at the idea that her girlfriend could aggravate her injury. Chloe gave her a piercing look. "No, it's okay!" Beca watched silently as the orderly guided Chloe to the bench where she eagerly put her splint back on. She didn't understand Chloe's frustrated look and dry tone. She walked over to her and crouched down to help her put on the last scratches. "It's okay, Beca, I know how to do it myself." The redhead grumbled, stretching out to reach the end of the splint. Beca knew how those kinds of movements could further pull on her chest wounds which would take longer to heal than her broken leg. She saw Chloe frown in pain and look away in pride. Beca rolled her eyes. Her patience was starting to reach its limits but she let Chloe collect her things without saying anything.
"See you in two days, Chloe! You did well today, you deserve a little rest." Antonio said, patting her on the shoulder. "Thanks for today. See you soon." Chloe said, the bag on her shoulder.
The two young women got into the car without a word being exchanged. Beca knew Chloe well enough to know that the slightest remark would set things on fire. Still, she thought this remark was rather nice. "You crushed it, Chlo', you will soon be able to walk normally." Chloe didn't respond and her gaze was shifty. She remained with her nose pressed to the car window. Only her clenched fists showed her anger.
"I should leave the Bellas."
"What ?!" Beca whipped to a stop behind a car at a red light. She looked at Chloe, astonishment clearly visible on her face. "What are you talking about?"
"I can't even take a step without falling. I should leave the group." Chloe explained as if the connection was obvious. The brunette frowned. The Bellas without Chloe couldn't exist. It was like morning without coffee, toast without jam, day without music. Impossible. "You can't leave, we need you." Beca said absently as she got back on the road. "Exactly, that's what I'm saying. I'm no good to you if I can't dance anymore." Beca cursed herself internally. She hadn't said it in that sense but, obviously, Chloe had taken the remark as it suited her. "Don't be so hard on yourself. You succeeded today!"
"I didn't succeed at all. I fell." The musician turned off the radio to concentrate on the conversation. Her knuckles gripped the steering wheel so as not to lose patience. She had known Chloe to be more combative than that. "Would you please stop complaining? You started your rehabilitation barely a month ago. It can't be fixed in two days. It takes time."
"I'm not complaining, Beca." Chloe articulated, visibly upset. "The truth is that I am no longer able to follow a choreography. I should concentrate on my studies and forget about competition."
"That's bullshit! I'm hearing your mother. What are you going to do next? Marry Tom because only he will be able to provide for you since you will be unable to work without your leg? Stop, Chloe! You will heal! It's annoying to see you negative like that!" The brunette parked in front of the Bellas' house, out of breath and red in her cheeks. She meant what she said but the way she said it could have been more polished. She already blamed herself. "Maybe I should do that, since you're tired of hearing me complain." Chloe stormed out of the car, grabbed her bag from the trunk and stormed back into the house, slamming the door. Beca dropped her head on the steering wheel. What an idiot she was!
Two discreet knocks sounded against the wood. Chloe huffed because she already knew who was on the other side. With no response, Beca opened the door and stuck her head in, a hand over her eyes. "Are you completely naked?" Despite herself, Chloe laughed and Beca knew she could go in. The brunette was accompanied by a steaming mug of tea. She sat down at Chloe's feet, handed her the cup and took a box from her pocket.
"I thought that, even if you were mad at me for taking care of you, I should at least continue to do it a little more." Chloe stared at the pain pills. Her leg hurt like hell after each session, everyone knew that. She opened a compartment to receive a capsule and put it in. "I hate you sometimes. Especially when you take care of me."
"Um, I'm not sure about that." Beca retorted. "But if you want, I'll let you win this argument if you explain to me what's going on in that pretty head of yours." Chloe sighed. Sometimes having a Beca who didn't want to talk about stressful topics did her a favor. She opened her mouth several times only to change her mind. She shook her head, as if to organize her thoughts but nothing came out. Seeing her struggle, Beca thought she might as well make the effort to start the discussion.
"I apologize for the way I spoke to you earlier. I know it's not easy for you and I let my impatience take over."
"It's okay. You're right, anyway." Without adding any explanations, Chloe once again remained silent. Beca watched her pick at her nails or play with a thread of fabric sticking out of her sweatpants. "I don't know what makes you so angry but you should see the progress you're making. I find it hard to understand how you can think so little of yourself, so suddenly. You were always the one who raised the morale of the troops." Chloe nodded and swallowed. She looked up at Beca with water-beaded eyes. "I'm so fed up with this situation already." She declared through a tight throat. Beca reached out to take her hand, not sure if she had the right to do more without risking rejection. She rubbed circles with her thumb to soothe her. "I know it's long but you're already progressing very quickly. Look, you put cloths on all by yourself this evening!" Chloe smiled wetly. She had struggled for a while to get her foot into the pants, but after that, putting the garment on had been fairly easy.
"What is gnawing at you so much? You know I can hear everything." Beca assured, her voice soft and calm. "You've heard worse from me." Chloe smiled again and wiped a tear from her cheek. Everything was mixed up. Her brother, her parents, her hospital bills, her studies, the Bellas. "I feel like I'm letting you all down. I'm afraid I'll never be able to dance with you like I did again." Beca leaned as if to tell her a secret. "You know, it's not just for your choreographies that you are essential to us. Well, first, I need you to avoid having an aneurysm during each practice." The brunette listed on her fingers. "Stacie and Amy need you to avoid hitting each other. You serve as a confidante to all the girls, even Lily, I'm sure." Chloe rolled her eyes at this remark, with a small smile. She was the only one who could enter Lily's room. "Without you, no one would have joined the group. We wouldn't have won last year without your nodule surgery which gave us a bass note that's impossible to do in a group of girls!" Chloe burst out laughing. Her voice had changed right after her surgery, but since then her vocal cords had healed enough to no longer produce that kind of sound. Her face became serious again with the silence that settled in the room.
"I do all this because I love you. I've always worked like that."
"I know! But you let everyone depend on you without ever asking for the same thing in return."
"That's how I learned to live." Chloe said with a shrug. "The one who was at home sick was Chris, not me. So they always had to take care of him. Then as my parents were grieving, I tried to take care of them." Beca shook her head sternly. It was better not for her to talk about Chloe's parents. The Beales made their daughter feel so bad for what she had sacrificed for them. "I don't think I'm going overboard by telling you that your brother would never have wanted you to fend for yourself out of pride in asking for help. You know you're not alone." Beca's words echoed through Chloe like a distant echo. She couldn't know how close she had been to the last words her brother had spoken.
You have to let me go, Chlo'. I won't be here anymore but you will never be alone.
The salty pearls were streaming down her face but Chloe didn't care, her mind occupied by the last memories of her brother. Beca came to hug her, apologizing a thousand times. "I miss him so much."
"I know, I know." Beca was swinging them to comfort the redhead however she could. She was terribly angry with herself for being the cause of her girlfriend's tears. "He was so brave. He fought so much longer than me." The brunette placed her lips at Chloe's hairline, hoping to soothe her a little that way. Finally, the redhead gently pushed her away to wipe her cheeks. "He wouldn't want me to give up like that." She declared in a convinced tone. Beca watched her gradually transform and regain her composure. Her eyes became harder, her face less sad and more assertive.
"I will be able to walk, even if I have to pay for two more months of rehabilitation. And I will go see Chris without a brace and without a crutch. To show him that I could heal." Beca noticed the new glow in the turquoise pupils. She had never had any doubts about Chloe's recovery but she was happy to see that finally, the redhead was starting to believe it too.
"Even if it takes you years to be able to dance again, I know you will get there." Becasaid. They smiled at each other, one very proud to witness this change, the other determined to fight as long as necessary.
The Bellas' doorbell rang at the end of the day, and this time, the people on the other side of the door were actually expected. Beca opened with a smile on her face. "Quinn, Rachel, Santana," Beca greeted. "And…"
"It's Brittany. We brought our two roommates for the evening." Quinn pointed. "You don't blame us?"
"No, go ahead, come in." Beca guided them to the living room where childish laughter could be heard. Chloe was committed to her role as the monster who wanted to devour Lucy's neck, to the delight of the little girl who was laughing out loud. "So here is the little lady who leaves applesauce stains on her mother's cloths." Rachel said, coming forward first. "That's her. It's Lucy." Chloe stopped playing with Lucy for a moment to say hello.
"Don't get up." Rachel intervened, leaning over to wrap her arms around her. "How are you doing?"
"Good! This little scoundrel won't let go of me anymore." Chloe smiled, tickling Lucy who burst into laughter. "Well, she likes you a lot." Santana noticed, mentally taking notes for her file. "Yes, when Chloe is here, I'm no longer useful." Beca joked. "You can sit down." The new arrivals scattered across the armchairs while Beca went to prepare the tea tray. Lucy immediately noticed her mother's brief absence and became slightly agitated. She looked to the right and left, leaning back to gain a field of vision, under the amused looks of the adults. Rachel, who was closest, grabbed an elephant from the coffee table and showed it to Lucy in a childish voice. "Is that yours? How beautiful he is!" Lucy reached out to try and grab her elephant so Rachel leaned down to give it to her. The little girl hugged him tightly before hiding in Chloe's neck. Everyone softened in front of her expressions.
"She's adorable." Brittany commented, absentmindedly stroking her stomach. Santana took her hand with a knowing look. Soon it would be their turn. "She doesn't get that from me." Beca said, placing the tray on the table. Lucy immediately turned her eyes to her mother and jabbered the syllable "MA" repeatedly while jumping up and down on Chloe. The redhead laughed and handed the child to Beca. "Ah, I have to leave for you to miss me." The brunette teased then placed a kiss on her daughter's cheeks. "Maria isn't there?" Beca approached Santana and Brittany with the child in her arms. She showed Lucy how to wave.
"She's upstairs. She's taking pictures of the room." The lawyer nodded. It was nice to see that the social worker still took her job so seriously. "I should visit Lucy's room, too. To check that nothing is missing, even if I doubt it."
"Yes, no problem. I'll show you before you leave." Beca then stood in front of Quinn to ask Lucy to wave hello. The blonde was moved by the little brown head that was moving her little chubby hand. "Hello you. Your mother has told me a lot about you." She said, taking Lucy's fingers in her hand. The baby stopped for a second to examine the touch of this new hand and then she gently tapped it, babbling. "What strength! You'll soon be ready to join the Bellas."
"We still have time for that." Beca laughed, turning to Rachel. Beca repeated the process, waving at Rachel. Lucy surprised everyone by leaning forward strongly, arms outstretched, to join the equally surprised brunette. Beca placed Lucy on her lap and moved away to take her place next to Chloe. "I think you have competition."
"I think so too." The redhead smiled. "Didn't you say that she didn't approach people too much?"
"She only accepted Chloe until now." Beca confirmed to Quinn. Everyone watched as Rachel entertained Lucy. The little girl was playing with the bracelets that Rachel wore on her wrists. "It's a good sign, I think. She seems comfortable." Brittany said. "Yes, I think so too. She takes her time to trust." Quinn added. "Like Beca." Chloe teased, making everyone laugh. The brunette nudged her, falsely angry. Since her daughter seemed busy with Rachel, Beca figured she had the perfect diversion to leave the room for a few minutes. "Santana, I can show you the room now, if you want."
"Yes, let's go." The Hispanic agreed, getting up. "Should I leave Lucy to you?" Beca asked Rachel. The brunette nodded absently without taking her eyes off the child and the two young women left the room without Lucy realizing her mother's departure. Quinn watched her partner chat with the child, imagining what her evenings could be like with a little one who looked just like them and with whom Rachel could chat in the same way. "It suits her well, doesn't it?" Brittany whispered in her ear. Quinn smiled.
It was no secret. Quinn had wanted children since she got pregnant when she was sixteen. She had to abandon her daughter to ensure a better future for her, but the desire to pass on and give love remained with her. Rachel wanted children too, of course, but their situation was not yet right to welcome a newborn. The debate was always the same: Quinn wanted to get married first but Rachel wanted Quinn to go back to school; Quinn would only resume her studies if Rachel returned to Julliard. Having come full circle, they no longer dared to broach the subject for fear of causing a new confrontation. Since then, new problems have been added. Quinn knew they would have a child one day. When they would have healed their past wounds. Or at least learned to live properly with them.
"So, Chloe, how's your leg?" The blonde asked.
Chloe put her cup down on the coffee table and sat back on the couch before answering. "Better! I started rehabilitation. I tried to take a step without a brace this afternoon."
"Oh, that's great! How did that happen?"
"I fell." Chloe deadpanned. Silence enveloped the young women. Lucy was nibbling on her elephant's trunk, her eyes heavy with Rachel's rocking as she followed the conversation. "Paris was not built in a day. You'll get there, you just have to believe in yourself." Quinn assured. "I know but it's very hard. I keep telling myself that I need to walk without needing help so that I no longer have to go to the clinic. With each failure, I feel like my healing is delayed. The bills are piling up and I would like to go back to school. I wish I could dance again." Chloe interrupted herself. She wasn't used to opening up so easily in front of strangers or people she barely knew. Brittany, who knew the problem quite well, got up to join her on the couch. She placed a hand on Chloe's joined hands.
"You know, I'm a professional dancer and I've been injured before. Very often. We were cheerleaders in high school, with Quinn and Santana, and the practices were monstrous."
"That's an understatement." The former cheerleader captain commented. "All you can tell yourself is that it's better to take the time necessary to heal your leg. If you start dancing again with a trembling and unsteady leg, you risk making it worse, injuring yourself or someone else."
"She's right. Rehabilitation is the longest part because you don't see what's going on inside like you could see your wounds closing. You just have to be patient." Quinn advised with a shrug. "Patience isn't my strong point." Chloe muttered. "I've seen that somewhere before." Rachel laughed. "Quinn had a bad accident when we were in high school." Chloe turned surprised eyes on Quinn who was rubbing her hands, embarrassed. "I was hit on a highway by a truck. I was responding to a text, I didn't see that the truck had run the stop sign." Chloe grimaced as she heard the story. She wondered how the young woman in front of her could still be alive.
"I was in a wheelchair for months. My spine was affected. I had quite a few injuries, broken ribs, and a punctured lung, like you." Quinn listed. "I couldn't even take a shower alone anymore."
"Practice was very weird without you." Brittany remembered. "The doctors thought I would be unable to walk again. I proved them wrong. Even though nothing was certain, my mother paid for the care. After my pregnancy, our relationship was strained but she had just left my father. She found a second job to pay the rehabilitation bills."
"It took months. You were unbearable." Rachel said. "I went with her at the beginning." She added. "Yes, until I sent you away." Quinn revealed with a guilty look. "I was impatient, like you. And I blamed the whole world. After having suffered a pregnancy, my father who threw me out, the harassment in high school, the loss of popularity, I had to suffer a car accident which could permanently shatter my dreams."
"How did you keep the strength to continue?" Chloe asked, absorbed in Quinn's story. "It was Santana who came to tighten my straps." Quinn smiled. "Rachel and I were at odds. She blamed herself because I was going to her wedding at the time of the accident…"
"You're married ?!" Beca interrupted, returning to the room with Santana and Maria. "No!" Rachel laughed. "That's a story for another time."
"Quite a story! Are you talking about your accident?" Santana asked, joining her partner. "Yes and how you came to ask me to put my shit together." Santana smiled in turn at the euphemism. She and Quinn had always had this kind of double-edged relationship. "I went to see her in rehabilitation to tell her to work things out with Rachel because I was tired of hearing apology songs in glee club." The brunette in question rolled her eyes but said nothing.
"It didn't change anything. She remained stuck in her stubbornness, so I took the strong approach."
"She prepared a board with photos of all the dreams I had. On one hand, there were those possible in a wheelchair and on the other, those who were not feasible."
"Not necessary to say that one of the two columns was fuller than the other..."
"Even if nothing is impossible, technically."
"Yes, well, in the mind of a seventeen year old girl, being promoted to prom queen on wheels sucks. In any case, for you, it was one more goal that would disappear if you stayed in a wheelchair."
"All that to say, it was her way of getting me to move. At each session, no matter who was with me, my board was there. It took me a full month to know how to take a step, legs straight, arms on the bars. Two months to learn to take three steps without holding myself. A little month later, I knew how to get up from my chair on my own. It was very difficult but little by little, everything became easier."
"Seeing you moving now, we can't imagine what you've been through." Beca said, admiring. "Nothing is really mapped out."
"Besides, you danced at nationals that year." Brittany added with a wink. "And we woooon." Rachel crooned, dancing in her seat. Lucy, who was surprised to be a little heckled, finally became aware that her mother had returned to the room. She moaned, calling Beca who immediately went to pick her up in the arms of a guilty-looking Rachel. "Your bond has really strengthened." Santana remarked with her lawyer's eye. "Lucy spends her days calling Beca when she's not there." Maria informed, remaining discreet. Santana's lips stretched into a confident, proud grin. No one could question the relationship Beca had with her daughter, not even a judge.
"It's perfect. We should leave before we're late for the restaurant." The lawyer said, looking at her watch. Her friends agreeing, they stood up to greet Beca and Chloe. Quinn took the redhead by the shoulders to tell her one last time not to give up. "Thank you very much, Quinn. I keep the idea of the dream board."
"I'll bring it back to you next time." The quartet left the house under promises of meeting soon. Beca returned to Chloe, her daughter in her arms. Maria had excused herself to go to the bathroom. "It's incredible what happened to her. She will always surprise me."
The redhead nodded absently. All that remained was for her to get moving and work harder. "What did Santanta and Maria think of the room?"
"They are satisfied with it. Santana reminded me that I should already find out about registering for preschool. This must be done at least a year and a half before the child starts school."
"So early? She doesn't even walk yet!"
"I know, it's crazy." Beca commented, looking overwhelmed. "And I have to ask my father if it's possible for me to add Lucy to his insurance policy or if I should take one in my name for both of us."
"More paperwork."
"Exactly, but I never would have thought of it without Santana and Maria."
"They really know their job." Chloe remarked, stroking Lucy's hair. Maria came back into the room at that moment and saw Chloe place her lips on the child's hair. Here was one that she was not happy to take back with her on each visit. Beca took such good care of her daughter that every departure was painful, even for the social worker.
"I'm sorry, ladies, but I'm going to have to take Lucy back to the foster home." Beca sighed sadly as she hugged her daughter a little tighter. Chloe joined her and wrapped her arms around them both. Maria noticed with astonishment how the three of them formed a beautiful family. Young as she was, Beca seemed ready to face parenthood head on. She was no longer the anxious, defensive young mother she had encountered a few weeks earlier. Maria watched the two young women busy dressing Lucy in her coat. Chloe held her while Beca put her hat and scarf on.
"Be good, my love, for mommy." Beca finally asked, kissing her daughter one last time, her throat tight. "And for Chloe" The redhead added, doing the same. Chloe handed Lucy to Maria while Beca kept her arms around her body as if to protect herself, her gaze glued to the ground. Lucy clung to Chloe, her eyes frantic. She was complaining because she didn't understand why she had to leave. Her little fingers got tangled in the fabric of the young woman's sweater. Reluctantly, Chloe gently removed Lucy's knuckles and placed a kiss on each of her palms.
"See you soon, little shrimp." With tears in her eyes, Chloe put an arm around Beca as she watched Maria walk out the door with Lucy already crying in her arms. "Only two weeks left." The brunette breathed against her neck. Chloe's heart sank. The wait was endless.
Rachel and Quinn were the first to enter the restaurant, the brunette on the blonde's arm. Behind them, following suit, Santana and Brittany held hands like they always did. The restaurant located in the center of Atlanta offered a cocooning but chic atmosphere with its comfortable benches and subdued lights. Quinn had booked this restaurant because she liked the discretion of the servers and the spacing between tables. Everyone could create their own little bubble while eating.
"Good evening. Did you save a table?" A hostess asked, distinguished by her black shirt. "Yes, in Fabray's name, please." Quinn replied. "I have it here." The hostess pointed. "You can follow me." The redheaded woman in her fifties guided them to a remote table in the corner, offering two benches facing each other. "I'll come back with the menus." The four friends took off their coats and scarves and sat down. A few seconds later, they accepted the cards and began to leaf through. "The white wine is very good here." Quinn pointed out. "How do you know that?" Rachel asked immediately, alerted by Quinn's alcohol consumption. The blonde rolled her eyes but smiled slightly, nonetheless. "I didn't just go to nightclubs when I was with the High Notes. We came here with my writing group to celebrate our results in the competition two years ago."
"Ah, I see." Rachel said, shrinking behind her menu. "Do you still have contact with these people?" Quinn lowered her card to look at Santana. She already knew what she would eat anyway. "Actually, two of them graduated and left. The third, Hayden…" She added with a clearing of her throat. "Is not very social." Rachel giggled, hiding behind her booklet. Santana narrowed her eyes. "The same Hayden who left you in those fucking bathroom?" Brittany and Quinn cringed at Santana's blunt language. No one wanted to remember what happened to Quinn.
"The one and only. She could have become someone if she had put in the effort."
"For that, she should have stopped stuffing her nose with white lines." Rachel said, consulting the dessert menu innocently. "Not everyone has the desire to improve." Brittany commented, bringing the whole table into agreement. "Good evening, ladies, have you chosen?" A waiter interrupted. The four friends took their order and the waiter went directly to communicate the dishes to the kitchen and the drinks to the bartender. When the glasses arrived at the table, Rachel was surprised at her friends' sobriety but said nothing. Everyone had chosen a non-alcoholic drink. Quinn, for obvious reasons, but Brittany and Santana weren't usually this restrained.
"To our well-deserved vacation in good company." Brittany toasted. "Yes, cheers to your vacation." Rachel pointed out, laughing. Quietly, they chatted while sipping their drinks. Quinn's restaurant was a hit with students who were particularly keen on the European-style waffles. She was also happy and proud to tell her friends that she had picked up her pen again and started a new, unpretentious story. "It's just one step closer to going back to school." Santana joked.
Rachel enjoyed working in the restaurant and preferred some of her classes more than others, although her level remained much higher than that of her classmates. She loved it when someone sat at the piano at Queen's Coffee and played a song. Besides, she told them about their meeting with Beca and then about Chloe's accident. Their dishes arrived during the discussion and very quickly, there was nothing left on the plates. Rachel was finishing one of her stories when the waiter brought the dessert menu. Only the two blondes had a cup of ice cream.
"And you, Brit', how are the classes going in your dance studio? Do you have a lot of members?" Brittany taught several styles of dance in a studio she created herself. The one who was called stupid at school was very proud to show how successful she had been. "Yes, the classics course for children is full. I also have around fifteen adults for the Wednesday evening class. We mainly do jazz."
"That's awesome! Are you doing a gala at the end of the year? I would love to come see you." The dancer smiled lasciviously. A little being was now growing inside her and she couldn't handle an entire dance gala while eight months pregnant. "There will be a gala, but it will be without me." She announced, glancing at her wife who smiled back. "Oh, why is that?" Quinn asked. She would also have liked to make the trip to see her friend dance again. With a look, Brittany and Santana agreed. It was time.
"In fact…" The brunette began, putting his arm around her wife. "We have something to show you." Santana reached into her coat pocket and pulled out a small cardboard box, no bigger than a jewelry box. She placed it in front of Quinn who looked back at her in surprise. The blonde pushed aside her ice cream cup and took the paper cube in her hands. "What is this?"
"Open it, there's something for you inside." Brittany encouraged with all her teeth. Perplexed, Quinn slowly opened the small lid. The box looked fragile. Rachel leaned over her shoulder to see as well. Inside, a pacifier with a single question on the backing: Do you want to be my godmother? Rachel immediately covered her mouth with her hands while Quinn looked blankly as if her brain had stopped beating and her heart had stopped thinking. Or was it the other way around? Placed against the wall, Rachel couldn't leave the seat to hug her friends so she grabbed their hands then shoved Quinn to make her move. The blonde finally came out of her astonishment and understood what was happening. Santana and Brittany were expecting a child. They were going to be mothers. And they asked her to be the godmother of their child. Without much awareness, she staggered over to Santana and took her by the shoulders, her eyes drowning.
"Thank you." She managed to get out before hugging her friend tightly. The brunette had tears in her eyes too. All moved and enthusiastic, Rachel began to ask her billion questions to Brittany who answered with the same energy while Santana continued to be stared at by Quinn. They had resumed their places but the blonde was staring at her without blinking, her gaze absent and her smile stretched and tired. For once, Quinn seemed happy. She held the famous pacifier with her fingertips and played with it as if she was already imagining everything she could do with her friends' child. Santana leaned down to joke mockingly. "You didn't answer, you know." The table turned to see Quinn's reaction. Her smile stretched even wider if that was possible.
"It's a yes, since we were twelve, San. It's always been yes." Unusually sentimental, Quinn then hid in her drink so as not to show her cheeks blushing with joy and excitement. She couldn't wait to meet this new addition to their group, to be able to teach them things, to read them stories. "I just have one prerogative." Santana said after a while. "No Broadway until they're six." Rachel immediately gasped indignantly, raising her arms, falsely furious. The other three women snickered. Santana knew she wouldn't escape it, anyway. Quinn had secretly loved musicals since she was a child.
Once the ice cream cups were empty, the conversation turned to the choice of the name of Santana and Brittany's future child. Rachel insisted that their middle name be Barbara if it was a girl, but Santana refused with scathing remarks in Spanish. Quinn laughed and added more to stir up the debate between the two brunettes. Brittany yawned into her hands as she listened to her friends chat. Her wife placed a hand on the back of her neck to get her attention. "You're getting tired. We should go." Santana realized. The blonde gave her a tender smile. Santana had always been attentive to her needs but she was even more so since they were expecting their first child. "San's right, I'm going to the bathroom then I'll pay the bill and we can go." Quinn explained.
"I'll come with you." Quinn and Santana got up from the benches and left their two companions at the table. Brittany looked at her friend for a moment. Rachel had dark circles under her eyes and drawn features. She finished her glass of water through a straw. "You didn't drink alcohol this evening." The blonde remarked. Rachel looked up without taking her mouth off her straw. It was a hidden question. Why didn't she drink alcohol, she who generally loved white wine? The brunette set down her glass gently and grouped her hands in front of her. Brittany found herself thinking that this was the first time she had seen Rachel so uncomfortable.
"The last time I drank, it ended badly. Santana must have explained it to you, you're not hiding anything to each other."
"She told me what she had seen. Not what could have pushed you to this point." Brittany skipped the details. Rachel suspected that Santana had been very shocked and angry. "I don't know how to fully explain it yet." Rachel began, looking frustrated as if the fact of not knowing how to express herself bothered her deeply. "We talked a lot with Quinn and a few things came up." Faced with her friend's upset look, the blonde placed a gentle hand on Rachel's joined hands as she was picking at the skin around her nails. "You don't owe me an explanation. I just wanted to tell you that if you needed it, I was there. Whatever the reasons that pushed you to act like this, you must have felt extremely alone. That means we all failed in our role." Rachel inhaled with a wheeze. She captured Brittany's hand in both of hers to support her words.
"You're a good friend, Brit'. Even if you had been there, even if you had confronted me, I wouldn't have said anything to you. I was like two different people." She finished with a sigh. After a while of playing with the rings on her friend's fingers, she added in a small voice. "I'm still looking for the person I was before Quinn's overdose." Brittany turned her hand to rub circles on the brunette's, her eyes misty. "We'll be there to help you find her then." Brittany smiled at her. Rachel immediately shook her head.
"No, you're having a baby, careers to pursue…"
"Rachel." The blonde interrupted harshly. "We pulled together to help Quinn. You, first of all, have sacrificed so much. It seems normal to me that you got lost along the way. Let us help you now. You don't have to do it alone." A tear escaped Rachel's cheek and reached the corner of her lips. She gave her friend a smile full of thanks. Her heart swelled with love. Quinn and Santana came back and put on their coats. The blonde saw Rachel wiping her cheeks and gave her a worried look. The little brunette shook her head with a small smile.
Once they were dressed, Rachel took Quinn's hand and held herself against her. Quinn placed a kiss at the crown of her hair. She invited her friends to move forward with one hand. She kept Rachel preciously pressed against her side with the other. She had always been told to keep her treasures as close to her as possible.
"Do you think everything is ready for tonight's party?"
"I don't know but Lucy is ready for the photo shoot." Beca replied, showing her daughter through the door. The Bellas were throwing a Halloween party at the villa and, of course, costumes were in order. Beca and Chloe were getting ready in Chloe's room with Lucy, who Maria had left alone for an hour with her mom to quickly visit another child she was taking care of. Chloe went to meet Lucy to hug her.
"Look at you! You're amazing in your disguise, my Lulu! You see it suits her." Beca rolled her eyes, smirking. The costume they had bought a few days earlier was slightly too big for her daughter but not big enough to be obvious. Lucy had already grown up a lot. "You're coming? We should take photos together." Chloe opened her eyes wide at Beca. She thought she would be the one to take the photos of Beca and Lucy and not be able to record those first memories with them. "Are you sure you want me to be in the photos with you? You will keep them all your life."
"Yes, that's the goal. She will be able to see how well looked after she was." The redhead softened and took Beca's outstretched hand to join her on the bed. They sat down with Lucy between them and took a few pictures. Chloe wasn't so focused on the camera but rather on Beca who was beaming since the start of the day and Lucy who was chewing on her little fists while babbling, full of drool. She never thought she could love a child so quickly and yet, she was beginning to understand how hard it would be for her to be separated from Lucy if her relationship with Beca didn't work out. Beca caught Chloe's evasive and serious look as she looked at the photos she had just taken. She turned to place a hand on Lucy's abdomen, joining Chloe's already present one.
"Everything's fine?" Chloe, interrupted in her thoughts, opened her mouth before exhaling, caught in the act. "I just realized that I have already become quite attached to Lucy." Beca immediately softened and tightened her fingers around her girlfriend's. She didn't want to ask Chloe to raise Lucy with her. It was neither Chloe's choice nor her responsibility. However, she imagined very well what perfect partner Chloe would be to educate her child. "She already loves you too, you know." As if to confirm Beca's words, Lucy turned to Chloe, repeating "LO" and waving her elephant. The two young women were enthusiastic about this new syllable. Chloe took the elephant to make Lucy practice. "LO? Is this your elephant?"
"LO. LO. LO…" Lucy continued, gesturing towards Chloe. "I think she's calling you." Beca said, her eyes shining. Chloe sent the elephant towards Beca to check but Lucy kept pointing at her with her fist and saying "LO". The redhead took her in her arms, squeezing her tightly.
"I think I will fall in love with every Mitchell who walks this earth."
"Ugh, gross, leave my dad out of this." Chloe shoved Beca gently, laughing. Yes, it was done. She already loved Lucy like her own.
The party was in full swing at the Bellas' house. Students always found a good excuse to party, but Halloween remained the most celebrated day of all. Each sorority threw unforgettable parties in their huge mansions. The Bellas were no exception. For the occasion, the Treblemakers were invited. Everyone had brought a friend who had brought a friend. The rooms were crowded with young people dancing, playing drinking games or chatting quietly. The disguises were all more eccentric than the others. A caveman was walking with a club and his fur toga, despite the coolness of October 31. Several Freddy Mercury and Pocahontas had taken photos together, too happy to find people dressed like them.
In the garden, Beca had set up her music equipment and was mixing to the delight of the people gathered around the pool. Sitting on a window sill, Chloe watched the crowd from afar. The bass pulsed against the walls. The bodies were mixed together. Chloe wondered if Beca had noticed the effect she could have on the crowds. When she started mixing, the rooms of the house had emptied up to accommodate more people in the garden. Discussions were rare, the music too lively to hold a conversation. The Bellas had wanted to find a group costume but no group had that many girls so they had to abandon the Spice Girls and Destiny's Childs, much to Beca's delight. Stacie had chosen Harley Quinn, sexy and full of madness. She was carrying around a huge plastic hammer, the pigtails swinging. She had met a pretty scary Joker and had been dancing with him since the beginning of the evening. Cynthia Rose and her girlfriend were Gomez and Morticia Adams. The young woman wore a mustache drawn with a felt-tip pen for the occasion. The outfits fit them like a glove. Lily had joined them by revisiting Wednesday Adams' look, which was far too real not to be an outfit she already owned. The three of them stayed near the bar. Jessica and Ashley were the Olsen twins, the darker of the two wore a wig. Flo had tied her hair in an African braid and was wearing a very colorful dress buttoned up to the neck. She had drawn a single eyebrow to look like Frida Kahlo. Finally, Amy and Aubrey almost had the same idea, surprisingly, and were dressed up as Barbie. Except that Amy's Barbie was wearing a pink tracksuit, her face was greasy, her t-shirt was full of stains, a perfect example of a Barbie in depression after a breakup, according to her. When they realized their disguises, they collapsed into laughter, Aubrey first. The former captain was the image of a feminine Barbie through and through, her hair straightened for the occasion. She danced with Jesse dressed as James Bond, simple and effective.
Chloe watched them having fun. She was surprised to see her best friend around the young man's neck. When Aubrey visited them, Stacie always came first. The relationship they had was ambiguous for all the Bellas and Chloe decided it was time to confront her best friend. Since Aubrey left campus, Chloe had gotten a lot closer to Stacie and she didn't want either of them to suffer.
"Beca's crushing it, right?" Stacie shouted in her ear, handing her her favorite drink. It was after midnight and the blonde had already had a good drink. Because of her medication, Chloe had promised herself to stay sober so she was also the one to take care of the others. Stacie had offered to go get her a drink. She nodded with a big smile. Beca always crushed it.
"Too bad she can't be here to swing her hips with you." The blonde said, moving her hips lasciviously, both arms in the air.
Chloe watched Stacie walk away, looking amused, to find a boy who was lucky to have bumped into her. She saw Jessica and Ashley dancing together or rather jumping like two crazy people, glasses in hands. They must have been empty. Cynthia Rose hugged her girlfriend's curves with her hands to the rhythm of the deep music. Amy had been missing upstairs with her boyfriend for a few hours already and Chloe didn't want to know what she was doing there. The redhead was surprised to see Jesse and Flo dancing together. The young man seemed totally under the spell of the Mexican dancer. Chloe scanned the crowd for Aubrey who she had just seen with Jesse. The blonde had come to find Stacie and separate her from the football player she had seduced. They were now dancing very suavely against each other, Stacie's arms around Aubrey's neck. Chloe smirked into her drink. There would be things to talk about the next day.
"I hope it's soda." Beca said, joining her. Chloe glanced towards the sound system. She hadn't heard her leave the decks. No difference was heard. "I put a playlist on." Beca explained with her thumb. The musician grabbed the yellow cup that Chloe had lying around everywhere and took a sip. She made a wrinkled pout, struck by the acidity of the drink. "Cramberry juice. It's good for the kidneys, Captain." Chloe smiled proudly. Beca narrowed her eyes. She was dressed as a pirate, feminine but authoritarian with her saber hanging from her belt. She loved this teasing side of Chloe. "I'm going to need something stronger." She was heading towards the bar when Stacie put an arm around her shoulders. Chloe saw her being drawn into a drinking game. Participants had to drink a meter of tequila shots. Beca shook her head no but Stacie almost shoved the first drink into her mouth. Tequila was Beca's weakness. All the girls knew it, Beca loved it but didn't take it at all. She took the first glass with a grimace and returned it on the bar to the cheers of the people around. When Chloe saw her take the second and then the third shot, she realized it was done. Stacie, Jessica and Ashley, who were surrounding Beca, whistled and applauded her, shouting loud "Cap-tain" and "Mit-chell". When she downed the last one, Beca slammed both hands on the bar. She shouted "Like that?", hands towards the sky, to anyone who would listen. When she turned to join Chloe, conquering, her approach was assured and straight. She wore a tricorn on her head, her hair down and this crooked smile that made Chloe's heart flutter every time it was addressed to her. Her red colonel jacket hugged her body just right. The redhead liked seeing her like that, proud and confident. Alcohol gave Beca the opportunity to show herself without a filter, without a wall to protect her. Over time, Chloe could boast that she had made Beca confident enough that she no longer needed alcohol to be herself.
Beca wrapped her arms around her waist and pressed a wet kiss to her neck. Chloe chuckled and gave her an amused look when she pulled away. She had to look up a little. Beca's black boots gave her a good five inches on Chloe. "I'm going to regret this, right?"
"I think you already regret it." Chloe replied with pursed lips and laughing eyes. "I should've stuck to the cranberry juice."
"I already have a headache for you." Beca laughed and leaned to kiss her. The shy and introverted part of Beca was, at this moment, completely erased by the one who wanted to be extroverted and jovial. Chloe could smell tequila on her tongue. The music changed to No Diggitty by BlackStreet and, naturally, Beca had them swaying to the beat. When the chorus came, she pulled away to sing heartily, holding Chloe close to her. What started out sweet became more sensual. The hip movements were slow and rounded. Chloe moved a little closer to wrap her arms around Beca's neck and hide in the crook of her jaw. Beca's wandering hands went around her belt to rest on the small of her back. Chloe, as a hurt Catwoman out of necessity, was beginning to understand the looks Beca had given her when she came out of the bathroom. Her black faux leather disguise didn't leave much to the imagination.
Under the tones of the words that the brunette whispered into her ear, the butterflies in Chloe's stomach swirled and mixed. When Beca started the chorus, she thought she felt an explosion of small wings in her lower abdomen and her nails dug gently into the brunette's skin. Between sentences, Beca bit her earlobe. Caught off guard, Chloe moaned in a hiss. Her hips jerked of their own accord. As if turned on, Chloe moved her lips up Beca's throat. She placed one last kiss on the corner of Beca's ear.
"If you keep this up, we're going to give our guests quite a show." She whispered to her slowly. Beca pulled her away with both hands on her hips and Chloe could finally see that Beca wasn't indifferent to their dance either. Her intense blue eyes seemed hungry. She smiled lasciviously at her then approached her girlfriend's ear again. "If it allows me to take this outfit off of you, I don't really care, my little kitty." She said with a raised eyebrow, playing with the zipper that held Chloe's disguise in place. Eyes closed, Chloe took a deep breath. She swallowed hard. Beca's deep voice under the scent of alcohol gave her chills. Beca always smelled so good. She felt her lips then her tongue on her neck. As if burned, she opened her eyes and noticed that no one was paying attention to them. The Bellas were each busy dancing, drinking, having fun.
When her gaze found Beca's again, they both knew the decision was made. A few minutes later, Chloe's bedroom door slammed against the wall with a loud thud. Beca closed it with one foot, never detaching her lips from Chloe's. Her mind in a thick fog, she locked the door and gently pulled Chloe onto the bed. Along the way, they both took off their shoes. Beca's tricorn joined them immediately. Their movements were frantic and hurried. Beca felt overwhelmed with so many feelings at once. Chloe's hot breath caressed her cheek as she devoured her neck. Her skin seemed to be burning. Chloe's hands were trapped in her hair and clinging to her. She could feel her hips rising against hers at the sounds of her moans.
"Beca…" Lying on the bed, their legs and breaths intertwined, the two young women formed only one. Beca began her descent onto Chloe's cervix. She wanted to taste and feel every bit of skin of the woman she had wanted for so long. Clothes quickly became a barrier. Beca looked up hesitantly at Chloe, the zipper between her fingers. The redhead noticed Beca's injected eyes, her heavy breath. They shouldn't be doing this in this state. Chloe cupped her partner's face with both hands and pulled her towards her in a kiss that was meant to be slow and tender. "Not tonight, baby." Chloe said between two kisses. The brunette nodded absently. Beca's hands continued to roam Chloe's thighs but were less insistent. The pace slowed down. Their desires were put under pressure. Beca shifted to rest against Chloe, nose in her neck, ear against her chest, listening to her heartbeat. Calm enveloped them. They could hear the speakers beating time outside and the hubbub of discussions. Chloe played with the strands of Beca's hair absentmindedly.
"I wanted to." Beca suddenly drawled. Chloe smirked. Normally, Beca would never have admitted this. "Me too, but tomorrow, you will especially remember having drunk too much tequila." Beca buried her face in Chloe's shoulder and groaned, which made the young woman laugh. Slowly, she turned to face Beca and took her hands. "Don't worry, I'll take care of the old, hungover pirate who shows up tomorrow morning." The brunette smiled, eyes closed, before understanding the insult and opening her eyelids wide.
"Hey! I'm not that complicated." She grumbled, tickling Chloe. "Besides, you won't do anything at all. I'm old enough to take care of myself." She turned her back on Chloe, her arms crossed, sulking as she was at being taken for a child. Chloe laughed and leaned against her, putting one arm under her head and the other under her jacket. She tenderly caressed the skin beneath her fingers.
"We'll see about that tomorrow, miss I-know-where-the-aspirin-is-all-by-myself." The brunette huffed but said nothing. She was already dozing off.
The next day, by mid-afternoon, the Bellas' house was starting to get restless. Chloe was awakened by footsteps and her bedroom door swinging open. She stretched like a cat, noticing the absence of Beca beside her. The brunette had just run to the bathroom. As if to confirm her assumptions, Beca came back into the room looking pale. She headed to the sink where she quickly brushed her teeth. When she returned, Chloe handed her the glass of water and the aspirin she had prepared the day before.
"Thanks. I never want to see tequila in this house again." Chloe laughed as she burrowed back under the covers. They were in no hurry. It was a holiday so they could enjoy a quiet morning. Beca joined her and leaned against her. She placed her lips on her jaw to say hello and closed her eyes. "Who is responsible for making me drink?"
"You don't remember?" Chloe was surprised. There was silence as Beca went back through her memories. "Stacie."
"In her defense, you only said no to the first one." Beca groaned in protest and moved her hand under Chloe's top. The young woman was wearing a t-shirt. Goodbye sexy Catwoman outfit. Beca blamed herself for not helping Chloe undress. "Sorry about yesterday. You had to undress alone." She muttered. Chloe understood and smirked. "Actually, you offered to undress me but I ended up refusing." Beca suddenly remembered the words she had said and the step they had almost taken. She opened her eyes wide and her mouth shaped like an O as she moved away from Chloe. The redhead burst out laughing and grabbed her by the shoulders to prevent her from running away.
"It was very flattering. And very sexy too." Beca hid behind her hands, horrified. Tequila was clearly turning her brain upside down. Beca had always been uncomfortable when the subject of sex was brought up, even with the girls, during their impromptu sleepovers. Chloe, for her part, could not have been more free on this subject. She found it normal to talk about it and compare experiences. As long as it was a consensual relationship, nothing was taboo.
Tenderly, the redhead pushed Beca's hand away to reveal her face. "In other circumstances, I would have let you do it." She admitted more seriously. "But I didn't want it to happen like that and I don't think you did either." The brunette nodded, her cheeks pink, then placed her lips against Chloe's. The two young women sighed contentedly. "Do you have anything planned today?"
"Today is already well underway." Beca remarked. "Actually, I was thinking of going to the planetarium tonight. They're having a night out. Would you like to go?" Chloe nodded eagerly, hugging her tightly.
"Only the both of us?"
"Yes, you and me. Without the girls." Beca confirmed. "Perfect." Chloe smiled.
The Atlanta Planetarium was located in the city center, among stores, restaurants and museums. The streets on this holiday evening were rather deserted, except around the visiting places which was open especially for that. Hand in hand, Beca and Chloe had paid their tickets and were walking the halls. With the guide in hand, Chloe looked at the programming.
"What do you want to do first?"
"I want to show you the constellations." Beca said, dragging her into a dark room. They sat down in the amphitheater-shaped room. In the center, a guide gave explanations on certain constellations. Beca pointed to the sky. On the ceiling, Chloe could see all the stars as if she were under a real starry sky. She turned a bright face towards Beca before returning to her contemplation of the stars.
"The first constellation to be listed is that of the Bear." The guide indicated, changing the planetarium sky with a flick of the remote control. "The constellation is present in both European and Native American cultures, which shows the importance of this animal during the time of the first humans. We will then find constellations representing other animals, such as the lion called Urgula, or the dog. Then, the signs of the zodiac, which play a significant role in astrology. You will also be able to attend a conference on this subject in half an hour in room 4. Then come the mythological creatures and characters. The centaur, here. And there, Pegasus and Hercules." Chloe turned her head to look at Beca. The brunette was looking at the sky, her mouth wide open, her face full of wonder. Feeling watched, Beca turned her head as well and smiled. From her seat, she leaned towards Chloe to whisper. "Most of the constellations they show here are visible in the sky but because of the city lights, you can't see them well." The two young women were passionate about what was being said at the bottom of the amphitheater.
Once the explanations were finished, they went out and headed to room 4 to follow the lecture on astrology. Sitting again in a dark room waiting for the lecturer, they waited while leafing through the planetarium booklet. "Oh, this one, I wish I could show it to Lucy." Beca said, pointing to an animal exhibit. "We can still come back with her."
"She's still too young to understand anyway but I can't wait to be able to do these things with her." Chloe softened. Beca didn't often talk about what it was like for her to spend time without her daughter. It was true that she had opened up a lot in recent weeks and the revelation of her motherhood had helped, but she remained modest and concise when she expressed what she felt. Chloe took her hand and intertwined their fingers. "How many times have you come here?"
"Dozens of times." The brunette admitted shyly. "It's my favorite place in the city when I want to be alone."
"It's true that it's very quiet here, compared to the house full of noisy girls." Chloe remarked, laughing. The brunette nodded, laughing too. She turned to Chloe to explain her thoughts in more detail. "Actually, I came across here by chance. I was looking for a place to think. When we have problems, we believe that it's the end of the world. Looking at the stars makes you feel really tiny and your worries suddenly become smaller. So when I don't feel well, I come here. And sometimes I imagine myself explaining the myths around some of the constellations to Lucy. I imagine her growing up with a telescope in her hand." Chloe leaned her head against Beca's shoulder. She sighed. She already missed Lucy terribly so she couldn't understand how Beca managed with that sort of pain. It must be a hundred more like hers.
"You must miss her terribly."
"It's worse than that. I've never really lived with her and yet it's like my heart has been split and a part of it is walking on two legs outside my body." Chloe's heart sank. If only she could speed up time for the judgment to come or turn back time to prevent all this suffering. Chloe was so angry at this family for destroying Beca's life out of pure pride. "I don't understand how your ex could hurt her like that. I hope she doesn't have any memories of him."
"When I learned in what conditions she had lived at his house, I stopped sleeping at night. Since then, I try not to think about it because it destroys me. She should never have lived with him." The brunette showed an inhabited expression, her eyes staring into space. Chloe moved closer to her and placed her lips on her cheek. "She'll be better off with you."
"Sometimes, I wonder if I should tell her who he was, what he did, how we met. I think that when the time comes, I will tell her the factual truth but let her form her own opinion. One day, she will surely want to know her origins, it's inevitable." Chloe nodded slowly. Beca's situation was so unique that she could only give an outside opinion.
"I think you would make the right choice for her." Beca smiled at her and kissed her softly. They remained very close, each in their thoughts. The images in Beca's mind raced. She saw Lucy starting school, learning to ride a bike, playing her first musical notes. Enter high school then college. Becoming a Bella, under the proud gaze of her mother. Throughout all these stages, someone was always at Beca's side, admiring the steps Lucy would take. Beca was pretty sure, Chloe would be an integral part of their future.
"Good evening everyone, thank you for being patient. We are going to begin." The person with a mic said.
Forty-five minutes later, Beca and Chloe were heading to one last exhibit before heading home. The most historical of all, the exhibition dealt with the appearance of the sky in the Middle Ages in Europe. Chloe, who studied European cultures closely, was keen to see the constellations there.
"Look, over there, it's the sky seen in ancient Greece."
"But the Middle Ages take place after antiquity." Beca frowned. "They have to explain where the myths and legends that we find at this time come from. It has to come from somewhere."
Beca watched her girlfriend read the signs surrounding the photos of constellations, looking intrigued. Chloe never talked about her studies, or what she loved, except her friends, singing and dancing. All evening, she had shown interest in the stories they had been told, the myths linked to the different constellations, the invention of the telescope and measuring instruments. Beca opened a new eye to Chloe's personality that one might have thought superficial. The young woman was in fact passionate about history and culture.
"Why are you looking at me like that?" Chloe asked when she noticed that Beca was still stuck on her. Out of her thoughts, the brunette walked around her to stand in front of the photo of the Hermes constellation in turn. "For nothing. I just realized you're even more interesting than I thought." Beca explained with a shrug. Chloe shook her head, smiling at the corners of her lips. "You actually thought I was stupid."
"What? No!" Beca said offended, turning around quickly. "I would never think that! You're smarter than me. I didn't think you'd be so interested, that's all. Sometimes, I forget that you study tourism." When she saw the redhead approaching like a predator, Beca became wary. Chloe leaned down to whisper to her. "Out of the two of us, you are the most surprising today, Mitchell." Then she walked slowly, with her leg in a splint, towards the next photograph. Beca, stunned, rushed after her.
"Wait, Chloe, what does that mean?" The young woman sneered without giving a response. She took her girlfriend's hand to lead her towards the photograph of Andromeda. It was only after reading the signs surrounding the photo that she responded. "That means I never thought I'd see you looking at the stars. It also means…" She clarified, stepping forward so that no one would hear. "That I like discovering the real Beca." She finally whispered. The brunette blushed. Chloe was the first to whom she revealed this part of her personality. She wanted to share more than just good times with Chloe. She wanted to be authentic and natural to show her that she trusted her completely and that she was fully committed to their relationship. Sneakingly, Beca walked up to Chloe, who was busy reading a sign, to surround her and place her chin on her shoulder. Chloe let out a surprised gasp.
"The real Beca still has so much to show you, Beale."
"I can't wait then." Chloe said, covering Beca's arms with hers.
Doctor Watson's office was typically what one would imagine an average psychiatrist's office to be. Rachel and Quinn found themselves sitting next to each other in two comfortable armchairs facing an oak desk where a computer, pens and a notebook sat. The walls were hidden by bookcases filled with science and sociology books. There you could find Freud, Simone de Beauvoir or big names of Nobel Prize winners that neither Quinn nor Rachel had read. Doctor Watson walked quickly in and closed the door behind her.
"My apologies for the wait, ladies. We don't choose our emergencies." The two young women accepted the apology without flinching. The therapist was a brunette with curly hair that she wore very long. Thin and slender, she wore a thin blue striped shirt, dark jeans and black glasses. She opened her laptop and typed in her code. On her notebook, she wrote the date, time and names of the people she was visiting. Quinn noticed a mistake in her last name but said nothing.
"Very well, I understood that this is a first for you."
"As a couple, yes. We each consulted separately at different times in our lives." Quinn explained. The therapist nodded, taking note. She looked from Quinn to Rachel then from Rachel to Quinn. She noticed the difference in behavior: Quinn had her legs crossed, her hands on her legs; Rachel had crossed her arms over her chest and was looking at the books on the bookshelf.
"I'll introduce myself, perhaps, to break the ice. Then it will be your turn. I am Diana Watson, a psychiatrist specializing in cognitive behavioral therapy. I treat both adolescents and adults. I leave the children to my colleagues. I attended the University of Tennessee, Knoxville, before moving here. I opened this office three years ago." Quinn nodded and turned to see if Rachel wanted to start. The brunette remained focused on the decor around her, as if absent from the meeting. Quinn made up her mind and decided to introduce them herself.
"I'm Quinn Fabray, and this is my girlfriend, Rachel Berry. We're here because we have difficulty communicating. I also think there are other underlying issues but you will be better able to spot them than me." The psychiatrist thanked her with a small smile and a nod. She called out to Rachel immediately afterwards. "Rachel, why did you come to consult me?" Rachel, taken by surprise, finally looked the therapist in the eyes. The worried, almost frightened look indicated that she didn't know where to start. Doctor Watson leaned back in her chair and considered the best way to operate.
"You told me on the phone that you wanted to get better. Could you tell me right now what's wrong?" The little brunette found herself unable to open her mouth. She was shaking her head frantically and starting to get agitated. "Rach', everything is fine.", Quinn intervened in a soft voice, taking her hand. Rachel clung to it like a lifeline. She breathed quickly, too quickly, and closed her eyes to concentrate. "I'll be right back." The therapist declared before getting up to leave the room.
A few minutes later she returned with a glass of water and a piece of dark chocolate. She leaned against the desk and handed them to Rachel. The young woman took them, thanking her through her lips. "Do you often have this kind of reaction?" The psychiatrist asked. Rachel nodded, placing her half-full glass of water on the desk. "The panic attacks started when I was fifteen. I hadn't have them for a few years, until recently." Quinn was surprised at this news. She didn't know that Rachel suffered these attacks when they were in high school and even less that she had them from time to time, even under her supervision. "It was for these attacks that I began to consult the first time."
"I see. Would it be possible for me to contact your former therapist? With your agreement, of course."
"Yes, I will send his contact details to your secretary."
"Thank you. Do you know what started these anxiety attacks?" Rachel immediately turned her eyes to Quinn and the blonde could see all the distress she was feeling. She guessed that their story was linked to these anxiety attacks. She shook her hand gently and gave her a smile that was meant to be reassuring. "It's okay, you can say anything. I won't be angry or hurt." The therapist observed the interaction and saw Rachel take a calming breath. She clung a little tighter to her girlfriend's hand.
"When we were in high school, Quinn was the captain of the cheerleaders and the race for popularity was cutthroat. I was at the bottom of the social ladder with my gay parents and my ambition to be a Broadway star. The cheer squad and athletes ruled the school. Since I was the only one who really dared to challenge them, they made my life hell." Quinn looked at her shoes. She often thought about it as she would think about her first Christmas or her first romantic feelings, with nostalgia and dismay. Nostalgia for a bygone era, dismay at the memory of the person she no longer was. She had learned to forgive the teenager who had committed all these atrocities, but she had promised herself to never forget. "So, Quinn, you hated Rachel?"
"No, not exactly. I was questioning myself. Rachel is my true first love. When I began to understand that my jealousy was not towards her but towards the people she was surrounded with, I realized that I didn't hate her, quite the contrary. Before that, I was just a ball of hatred and destruction. I did the worst things to her that you can do at that age. And I can never apologize enough for that." Quinn felt Rachel's fingers tighten against hers. She had been forgiven a long time ago, she knew it. But the evil remained unchanged.
"Okay, I feel like you have a lot to tell me before we can figure out what to work on. I don't have an appointment after you, so we're going to take the time to make a correct chronology, what do you think?" The therapist had gone to her notebook and was already writing down the information they had previously discussed. Rachel and Quinn debated silently and agreed. They would stay as long as necessary. "To begin with, when did you meet?"
"In third grade, during the summer."
"Rachel took dance lessons in high school and had to share our locker rooms. I was going to be promoted as the youngest captain of the cheerleaders when my sister left for college at the end of the year, so I had to show myself as tough and bossy. And since you can't stand authority…" Quinn finished with a smirk.
"Yes, well, your orders were ridiculous. And I wasn't part of the team so there was no reason I should have cleaned up after you."
"We had a very eccentric coach. My orders came from higher up. If I didn't respect them, the whole team took a punishment." The blonde explained. "I see." Doctor Watson nodded. "So the confrontations began at that time. Anxiety attacks too?"
"No, it happened when my biological mother got back in touch, when we were in second grade."
"Tell me."
"I was adopted at birth." Rachel began.
Without warning, the three young women talked for almost two hours. It took them this time to put all the twists and turns of Quinn and Rachel's young lives back into place. At only twenty-three years old each, they had experienced abandonment, trauma, the loss of loved ones, not to mention what they had inflicted to each other, too wounded as they were to be of any benefit to each other.
"After everything you have just told me, it's even more admirable to see you together today." The therapist said, observing her notes. "Thank you. We would really like to try everything to save our relationship. That's what matters most." Rachel explained. "I can't lose Quinn." The blonde in question felt her cheeks heat up. It rarely happened to her, but Rachel had never gotten into the habit of declaring her feelings towards Quinn to anyone other than Quinn. They had always known how to keep this intimacy between them.
"This is entirely legitimate. I'll see you again next week to start work on this." Diana Watson said, standing up to shake their hands. The two young women greeted her and left the office with their hands intertwined. Rachel was satisfied with this first session where she was able to see how they were on the same wavelength. They had the same goals and the same expectations. All they had to do was work on it every day.
Barden University offered a wide range of choices in terms of studies and multidisciplinary activities, but Quinn already knew which ones she was looking for. She approached the reception desk with a slender step, a cardboard folder under her arm and introduced herself.
"I came to sign the documents you ask me to by email."
"Miss Fabray, indeed. I have your file here. As you are resuming a double course, you will need to sign both documents in two copies each." The blonde nodded and scribbled her name and initials at the bottom of each page. She kept one copy of each for herself and gave the other two to the secretary.
"All you have to do is show up in January. Welcome to the literature department, Miss Fabray." The young woman smiled at her.
"Thanks." Quinn replied. "Have a good day."
One step over, Quinn was now heading towards the city center where the next line on her mental agenda awaited her. Then she would go to the Barden Bellas house.
Chloe was alone at the Bellas' villa when the doorbell rang that afternoon. She put her binders aside and took a while to reach the entrance. She opened without any particular expectation.
"Quinn, hi! Beca isn't there, she's in rehearsal with the girls."
"Yes, I know. It's you I've come to see." The young woman, taken aback, let her in. She invited her to have something to drink in the kitchen where she had taken up residence to revise and prepare a dissertation. The winter weather made it impossible not to want a cup of tea or hot chocolate. Two steaming drinks later, Quinn could finally explain the reasons for her visit. "Chloe, I'm not going to beat around the bush. I know you need a job and I need someone to replace me at the restaurant. Would you be interested in taking on the position of manager?"
Chloe didn't know what to answer. She had no experience in the field and didn't know if she could accumulate her studies and a job. On the other hand, she needed money to continue studying. "You can arrange your schedule as you wish. I will remain there to help you manage. And of course, at the beginning, you will only take care of the paperwork until your leg allows you to run everywhere." The blonde smiled. "The salary is basic. Twelve dollars an hour, fourteen dollars on weekends and holidays."
"I don't know what to say. Why me?"
"You need it and you're older than most of my student contracts. You know how to manage a team and a budget since you are captain of the Bellas. You have some knowledge of accounting, depending on your studies. Plus, I know you often come with the girls so you know the locations and opening hours. I'll show you the few things you need to know and you'll be fine. I started like that, too." Chloe was lost. She didn't expect that when she got up that morning. "And when would you like me to start?"
"Actually, I'm going back to school in January." Quinn revealed. "I'd like to get back on track by then, so as quickly as possible. Whenever you want."
"Can I think about it?"
"Of course! Beca has my number. You'll just have to call me when you have made a decision." After her last sip of tea, Quinn stood up and put her coat back on. She replaced her stool and put her cup in the sink. Chloe got up to walk her to the door. "Thank you so much for thinking of me, Quinn."
"No problem. Think about it seriously. I would be happy if we could help each other." With these words, the blonde tornado left to return to her car. Chloe felt like a storm had erupted in the house, thrown a bunch of ideas into her head, and left. She slumped on her stool, disturbed. She wouldn't be able to open a single notebook until she at least talked to Beca about it.
After this busy day, Quinn had two things left on her list. She threw her keys in the bowl at the entrance to their apartment and started looking for Rachel. She found her in their room, a towel around her body, her hair wet. "Oh, I like this kind of welcome." Quinn greeted with a predatory smile. Rachel rolled her eyes and patted Quinn's arm gently before kissing her tenderly. The blonde insisted on the kiss, passing her tongue over her partner's lips but Rachel was adamant. "You booked for 7 p.m. We're going to be late." Quinn gave in and unbuttoned her shirt to change.
A few hours later, after leaving the restaurant, Quinn and Rachel were walking near a cliff. Quinn had parked the car at the top of a hill and led Rachel down a winding path that skirted the rock. The cold was not harsh enough at that time of the year to prevent them from having a good time. With her arms around Quinn's, Rachel discussed their therapy session, watching the steam escape from her mouth. "Doctor Watson seems really nice. I think we chose well."
"I like her too. She asks the right questions and is genuinely interested. I really appreciated that she extended our meeting to better understand." Rachel nodded silently and calm enveloped them. As they were out of town, the stars were really visible and the sounds of wild animals could be heard. You could guess a fox here or a bird there. Quinn loved this place. She often came for walks when she needed to think but had never taken Rachel there. "You see..." The blonde said, clearing her throat. "I often come here to be calm. When I have doubts or feel overwhelmed, it helps me slow down. To take a step back. Next time, maybe you could come with me, if you want to." She finally suggested.
Rachel, who recognized her girlfriend's effort, smiled brightly. Quinn was understanding and compassionate. They were learning to tame each other again and for the moment it was pure happiness. A shiver ran through her and Quinn noticed it immediately. "We're going to turn around."
They walked slowly up the path. As they walked, Rachel noticed that Quinn hadn't taken her hand out of her pocket since they left the car. She decided she shouldn't beat around the bush anymore and stopped them in their tracks. "Quinn, is everything okay?" The blonde, taken aback, turned slightly to smile at her. "Yes, of course, why?"
"What do you have in your pocket?" Quinn rolled her eyes. Count on Rachel to never miss a thing. "We can't hide anything from you. I wanted to show it to you at the restaurant but I didn't find the right time." From her pocket, she took out the folded document she had signed earlier that day at the university. She handed it to Rachel who could read "school certificate" and "double course in modern literature and philosophy". Her eyes opened wide and she looked from the document to Quinn several times. "I'm going back to school." The blonde confirmed. "In January."
"What? But, what about the restaurant?" Aware of the cold, the blonde put an arm around Rachel's shoulders and invited her to move forward. "I offered Chloe to replace me or at least to help me. I would like to get back on track before January. She hasn't accepted yet though."
"Has she ever worked in a restaurant?"
"No, but neither did you nor me. She needs a job and I need someone I can trust. I feel like it could work."
"I think you're right. Why didn't you tell me anything?"
"I wanted to surprise you." Quinn shrugged. Rachel shook her head but smiled, her face lighting up. She had asked her to go back to school so many times that she had lost count. Quinn was really trying hard to repair the bonds between them. Happy with the news, Rachel hugged Quinn and squeezed her arm. Silence fell around the couple and they slowly reached the car. Not wanting to miss the effect, Quinn pulled Rachel towards her by the wrist before she reached the vehicle. "There is another thing in my pocket that I have been hiding from you since this afternoon." The brunette looked at her, perplexed. She didn't expect to see Quinn get down on one knee, an open box in her hand.
"You always told me that the only condition for marrying me was that I resume my studies. You can't say no anymore." Rachel thought she was dreaming. Literally. It wasn't possible. Quinn wasn't proposing to her. Tears came to her immediately. Her hands covered her face. She had lost all notion of space and time. Quinn watched her giggle in astonishment and jump around like she couldn't believe it. "Rach'? It's cold, you know." The falsely confident blonde said. In reality, Quinn had been terrified of overdoing it. After the arguments they had had and Rachel's mental state, she wasn't sure if her gesture would be received positively.
"Rachel…" Quinn said again, taking her hand. As if electrified, Rachel came to her senses and shook herself. She threw herself at Quinn, knocking them to the ground, and kissed her all over her face. "Yes, yes, yes, yes, a thousand times yes!" Quinn no longer had an eardrum but she had gained a fiancée. Without waiting, she slipped the ring around Rachel's finger and kissed her again. They got up to get into the car.
That evening, only the stars witnessed what happened at the top of this hill. And what a show.