Roy unlocked his front door on Sunday night, a peculiar knot in his stomach. He expertly ignored it, however, and made his way up to the bathroom as though nothing was amiss.

They'd ended up staying at Gracia's for a few hours, catching up, and now he was officially ready for bed—though he wasn't sure how that would actually go.

His and Ed's conversation kept replaying itself in his head; Ed admitting to wanting kids, his ideas about raising them, the way he looked at Roy when he admitted to not wanting kids. What would he have said, if Gracia hadn't walked in?

Perhaps whatever it was he'd say it soon enough. It was painfully obvious what it would be; at some point one of them had to verbalise the fact that they were headed for an epic crash and burn, and Roy was pretty sure it wouldn't be him who'd bring it up, even though he was aware that maybe talking about it before the crash would minimise the lasting effects on their relationship.

Every time he thought about Ed slipping away the lump in his throat prevented him from speaking.

Ed silently followed him up the stairs and into the bathroom. He wasn't sure when they'd gotten close enough to be in the bathroom together while getting ready for bed, but

Roy found himself completely at ease with it.

As he brushed his teeth, he eyed Ed in the mirror as he threaded his fingers through his hair. He had work tomorrow. His day of hogging Ed was over, and the disappointment settled over his heart like a blanket.

His feelings truly were ridiculous. He wished he could control them, he wished Ed didn't know. But when he thought of Ed not knowing his emotions, he ended up thinking of when they inevitably broke the bond, and the void after that. Roy hated not knowing what would happen.

He rinsed out his mouth, and Ed came up behind him, threading his arms around his waist and resting his chin on Roy's shoulder. He caught his eye in the mirror. "You're so tense."

"I'm fine."

Ed rolled his eyes. He sighed and exited the bathroom.

Roy took this moment alone to pathetically sulk. He knew he was sulking, what with his pathetic thoughts followed by his pathetic emotions, but he couldn't stop it. If Ed asked he'd just say he was dreading work tomorrow—and it wouldn't even be a lie.

He made his way over to the bedroom, where Ed had already gotten under the duvet. The moment he got in bed and spooned Ed made him feel all kinds of better he wouldn't analyse right now.

Ed turned in his arms to face him, and they just looked at each other for a moment. Roy wasn't sure if Ed was expecting him to say something. Maybe this was it; this was the moment when Ed would bring up their discussion at Gracia's and they'd have a dreadful talk.

Ed sighed, reaching over and threading his fingers through Roy's hair. Bliss. "You were fine today," he mumbled. "What changed?"

Roy took a deep breath and turned onto his back, mostly to avoid Ed's eyes as he said, "Just dreading work tomorrow."

Ed stubbornly shuffled closer, tucking his face into Roy's neck. Roy couldn't help but smile, curling his fingers in his silky hair. "You're not usually this tense about work."

His fingers were trailing down Roy's chest, and it was making his breath hitch and his brain stutter. Did Ed know it had that effect on him? Did he do it on purpose?

Roy couldn't find the words to speak as Ed's fingers ran down his abs, so he didn't say anything.

"You're always so tightly wound," Ed said. He'd moved up slightly, so he was closer to Roy's face. His lips touched his cheek with every word. "You don't have to control every little thing, you know."

Roy exhaled what felt like a pathetic little laugh. "I can't help my nature, Ed. It's what I do. The way I live."

Ed's hand played with the waistband of his boxers, and it made Roy realise his heart was pounding and desire had already taken hold. It was that easy, when it came to Ed.

He felt Ed's little smirk on his cheek. "That just means I need to work extra hard de-stressing you." His hand dipped in past the waistband and gripped his cock, which was already embarrassingly hard. "See? You need it."

Roy's breathing was heavier as Ed slowly fondled him. He was going torturously slow, teasing the tip with his thumb, and Roy couldn't help it; he closed his eyes, trying to focus on his breathing.

Ed shifted, moving the boxers out the way. His lips touched Roy's, not quite kissing. "Even now, you're trying to stay in control."

Roy opened his eyes, staring into Ed's golden ones. They hadn't switched the bedside lamp off yet, and its golden glow made Ed's hair shine.

He wasn't sure what he was meant to say to that. He'd lost control many a time when Ed was involved, and it had been embarrassing at best, humiliating at worst, but every single time it had felt so incredibly soul shattering.

His hands came around Ed's back, palms stroking the soft skin. "I don't think I have any self-control when it comes to you."

Ed smirked, pecking him on the lips. "You're still holding yourself back though, to a certain degree." He straightened, straddling Roy's hips in one smooth motion, and Roy's eyes lost no time, taking in his sculpted chest and the erection his boxers were badly concealing. "I want you to just let go. Let me make you feel good."

Roy swallowed. His heart was pounding so hard he wondered if it'd just give up. "Come here."

Ed lay back down over him, and Roy wrapped his arms around him again, his intention to flip them around—but Ed tensed every muscle in his body and Roy had no chance of overpowering him.

Ed's smirk widened. "Nah." He grabbed Roy's forearms, brutally—and freakishly easily—pinning them to the bed by his head. Roy blinked at him in what was slowly registering as minor shock. "You're not taking control this time."

He became aware, in that moment, that he was panting. His blood had rushed between his legs so quickly it had left his brain starved and stuttering and dizzy. Apprehension and anticipation had him trembling as Ed's eyes hungrily trailed down his chest. He wasn't sure what to expect. He'd known he wasn't as strong as Ed, but until now Ed had just…allowed him that control. He hadn't thought about what could happen if Ed decided not to relinquish it.

Ed leaned forward, nipping his jaw. His hands slid up to grip his wrists instead, and Roy tugged experimentally, but Ed's hand didn't even move.

His cock was throbbing between his legs, embarrassingly leaking precum onto his abs. Ed paid it no attention whatsoever as he nipped and bit the skin of his neck, his throat. Roy was tilting his head back to allow him access almost automatically. Every harsh bite made his breath hitch even as he tried to stop it.

"Fuck, I love those little sounds you make, why do you try to hide them?"

Roy's heart was officially beating out of his chest. His face burned, every panting breath leaving his mouth louder than he was comfortable with, but he could do nothing to stop it. His hips lifted almost automatically, his cock trying to get any sort of friction it could get.

Ed chuckled, pushing his hips back down with his own. "We'll get to that."

His lips and teeth were back on Roy's burning flesh, nipping at his shoulder, his pec, his nipple. Roy hissed as Ed took his nipple between his teeth and pulled, but he felt it pebble, his body betraying him once again, and Ed did it again—and it felt even better.

Ed's wet tongue circled his nipple, then his lips sucked on it—and it wasn't gentle, he wasn't sure Ed was even capable of being gentle, but Roy wouldn't have it any other way.

Ed growled in pure primal satisfaction at the way Roy's body was responding to him, and he moved over to his other nipple, matching the treatment.

And Roy, once again belatedly, became aware that Ed's right hand was now on his chest, which meant Roy's left hand was free by his head. But he didn't move it; in fact, he was frozen in place as Ed's weight pinned him to the bed, pleasuring him in teasing little ways that had him harder than he should've been.

Ed's hand trailed down to his abs, which were clenched and tight. "Still so tense," he mumbled. The featherlight touch along his stomach had him shivering.

Ed looked up at him, his eyes taking in his face slowly and deliberately, and Roy felt his face burn even more in pure embarrassment. He had no idea what his face looked like right now.

"You wanna come?" Ed whispered, and Roy's entire body throbbed its answer. As though he felt it, Ed smirked, finally letting go of his other wrist and lowering himself between Roy's legs. "Say please."

"Ed," Roy croaked, in what was meant to be admonishing, but came out so desperately pleading. He closed his eyes, accepting his fate. "Please."

Ed hummed, and then his lips were around the tip of his cock and Roy gasped despite himself. Ed took more of his cock, and Roy focused on his breathing, his eyes fluttering shut.

But Ed pulled back, and Roy clenched his teeth to stop the whine, looking down at Ed, the why on the tip of his tongue.

Ed's hands stroked his inner thighs. "Let go, Roy. Just focus on how good it feels."

Roy gulped, abandoning his breathing; it was a lost cause. His panting was getting louder and deeper, and he was sure it wasn't exactly attractive, but his mind was dizzy, and all he wanted was Ed's lips around his cock.

Ed's tongue lapped up the precum that leaked down his shaft, and then in one, swift movement, he swallowed his entire cock. Roy couldn't have stopped the groan even if he tried.

Ed groped the meat of his thighs possessively as he sucked brutally, bobbing his head and looking up at him with that tantalising golden gaze. Roy grabbed his hair, keeping it out the way as he tried to guide Ed's head—but Ed was having none of it.

He pulled back again, and this time Roy did whine. "Every time you try to take control I'll stop."

Something indistinguishable left Roy's lips, probably a curse, a plea—something. He was so hard he was throbbing, and Ed really wasn't going to make this easy unless Roy just gave in and allowed his body full control over his mind.

Ed chuckled, wrapping his fist around his cock and it made his body sing. "Fuck, you're so hard."

I'm aware, Roy wanted to say sassily, but he didn't have the capacity for speech right now.

Ed sucked on the tip again, his fist pumping, and Roy decided to fist the pillow by his head instead of Ed's hair. Slowly, way too slowly, he took more and more in his perfect wet mouth, until his nose hit Roy's pubic bone.

Roy hummed in pure delight. Ed bobbed his head, sucking deliciously, his tongue running along the underside just so perfectly. "You're so good at that, Ed."

Ed hummed, taking him until the tip hit the back of his throat, and Roy's hips jerked. He winced, looking at Ed. "Sorry."

Ed pulled back again and glared at him. He grabbed his balls and cock in a brutal grip that almost made him yelp. "Don't worry about me, you hear?" His grip tightened, and Roy had to hold back a moan that took him completely aback. "If you wanna fuck my throat do it. Just let go, just take what feels good."

Roy nodded, his mind barely registering Ed's words as his cock throbbed in Ed's fist. Fucking his throat sounded really good right now. Yes, an incredible idea.

Ed let go of his death grip on his balls, and went back to sucking. The thin thread of Roy's sanity was taut, so close to snapping, and he wasn't sure what would be unleashed when it finally snapped. When he completely let go.

The tip hit the back of Ed's throat and his hips jerked again, but Ed took it, and Roy's body filled with tingles. He thrust up again, groaning to verbally release some of the tension he felt coiling inside him.

He wanted more, and he allowed his body to thrust again, and again, until Ed could barely keep up, until he was chocking on his cock—and the sound was incredible, the feeling building in his lower abdomen was incredible. "Ed," he gasped, aware that his breathing was beyond laboured, aware that any word that came out of his mouth sounded choked and pleading. "You feel so good. Don't stop again, please."

Ed sucked him harder, and the moan that left his throat barely sounded like his own voice. He could feel himself slipping, he could feel the depraved needs creeping up on him again, wanting to take over. He imagined Ed lying on his back on the bed, his hands palming his ass as Roy thrust into his throat again and again—

Roy moaned again, louder, his hand coming back to Ed's hair and keeping his head down as he thrust up. "You're so fucking beautiful," he growled, and Ed's hands fisted his inner thighs again, his golden gaze so hazy and turned on and intense. "Fuck," he gasped, his eyes fluttering shut.

Ed's nails dug into his inner thighs and he pushed them up, and Roy let him, only half aware as the pleasurable sparks shot through his body.

"Don't stop," he pleaded, just in case Ed was planning on pulling away again, just in case he'd done something wrong.

His face burned as Ed bobbed his head relentlessly. He could feel the orgasm building, and he was already so close. So damn close.

He thrust again, his primal needs taking over as he chased the orgasm. "Ed, don't stop," he babbled, moaning and whimpering right after as a fire burned through him. Close, but not just yet, but soon, so close—

Ed palmed his ass as he sucked, saliva making each glide so wet, so warm, so perfect. "Ed," he moaned, his fingers tightening their grip on Ed's hair.

Fuck, he was so close. He thrust up again and again and again, chasing the most incredible feeling, chasing the release of all the built up tension in his body—

Ed's thumb circled his entrance, and Roy gasped, shivering as he got that much closer to orgasm. "Yes," he breathed. "Yes, fuck, don't stop."

He moaned as Ed's tongue dipped into the slit of his cock, and then he was sucking again, his thumb circling the sensitive flesh of a part of him that had never been touched before, and Roy's mind was blank as the pleasure reached torturous levels—he was so close.

"Ed," he moaned. "Please." He wasn't sure what he was pleading for, but Ed growled around his cock as Roy kept thrusting, and then he felt a finger slip inside him, so easily, and it caressed a part of him that had his vision flashing white.

He was coming before he'd even registered what happened, his eyes squeezing shut as he groaned until his throat was sore, his cock throbbing incessantly as it spurted cum down Ed's throat. He couldn't stop moaning as Ed kept sucking every last drop out of him, couldn't stop the words from flying out of his mouth. He wasn't sure what he was saying, but it sounded like desperate, pleading begging—but all he could focus on was the orgasm that ripped through him and so thoroughly ruined him.

"Ed," he said again, his voice hoarse and shaky as the last wave of his orgasm washed away. It left him staring at the ceiling, black spots dancing in his vision, his entire body slightly trembling and thoroughly spent.

Ed crawled up the bed next to him, flopping down on his back. He was also breathing heavily and Roy glanced at him, then down, noticing the large wet patch on his boxers.

His mind was slush as he turned onto his side and cuddled up to Ed's side. Ed chuckled and lifted his arm to let him in closer. "One sec, gotta get out of these boxers." He manoeuvred them off himself, throwing them carelessly on the floor. Then he grabbed the duvet, bringing it back up towards them, and reached over to switch the light off, plunging them in darkness. Finally, he properly wrapped his arms around Roy. "That's better."

Roy's brain wasn't functioning well enough for speech. His whole body was heavy with exhaustion and calm. The tension had been stripped away, and it left him feeling cuddly, wanting to be wrapped up in Ed. And stay there forever.

Ed's fingers traced absent circles on his shoulder, and just as sleep was about to take them both under, he heard Ed's sleepy voice say, "You're mine too you know."

And then they were both fast asleep.

Roy had never hated his alarm more. Its blaring sound brought him back from the calm silence of sleep and the warmth of Ed's arms, and forced him to face yet another day.

"Fucking piece of shit," Ed muttered, eyes still closed.

Roy huffed in tired amusement. "Good morning to you too."

"Can't hear you," Ed said, rubbing his face. "My ears are bleeding."

Roy sighed, reluctantly untangling himself from Ed's embrace to turn around and switch the alarm off. The silence was blissful.

He snuggled right back into Ed's chest, pointedly ignoring Ed's chuckle. So he was being clingy, so what. Last night had melted his brain in the best way possible, and he was still incredibly calm because of it. He wanted to bask in this serene feeling before his brain caught up with the fact that he was now awake and started overthinking once again.

Ed turned onto his side, enveloping him in an overzealous hug that had Roy slightly suspicious, but he was also unable to stop himself from returning it.

He felt Ed's grin on his cheek as his hands roamed over his back, then his left trailed lower, to his ass, and—

Roy recoiled so fast he nearly pulled a muscle in his back. Ed threw his head back and laughed at the ceiling. "You're so fucking predictable."

His face burned in embarrassment. Who the hell randomly decided to attempt to finger someone like that!?

Ed laughed at him some more—a whole belly laugh. He sat up and wiped away a tear with his finger. "Fuck, that was amazing." He got out of bed and started rummaging through Roy's drawers.

Roy was fighting with his body's reactions, trying to get his face to stop burning. But his mind was running freely now, and he recalled last night and…

His face burned some more.

The orgasm had been incredible, he wasn't going to deny that, but he'd never thought that he'd…do that. Or enjoy it, even. Like it.

This was why he tried to maintain at least some base level of control. Because now he was feeling utterly humiliated, and he was unable to look at Ed.

A drawer banged shut as Ed said, "I can hear you overthinking from here."

Did Ed want to…Shit. So far Roy had been the one to fuck Ed—it was just what came naturally to him, what his thoughts consisted of when he got turned on and Ed was involved. But Ed was also a man. A man capable of…fucking. And Ed had never been with anyone but Roy, which meant that Ed had never…Dear God. Did Ed want to fuck him?

No. No chance. No. His heart pounded in his chest as his thoughts went wild. As he tried to picture it—Ed inside him, thrusting. And Roy just…taking it.

Desire swirled in his lower abdomen but he fought it hard, determined not to get turned on by the thought of Ed fucking him, by giving up that control. It wouldn't even work, right? No, it wouldn't. It really wouldn't. Ed had no experience, he'd probably come way too fast, and it just wouldn't work.

But he was slightly curious about the feeling. Ed seemed to enjoy it—a lot, actually. And the orgasm last night had been soul crushing…

"You're not ready for that yet anyway, so stop overthinking."

"I'll never be ready for that," he said hastily, sitting up in bed out of pure awkwardness. He felt restless now, with way too much energy. Adrenaline cursed through him and he wanted to escape to the bathroom and get ready for work. And overthink in peace.

Ed shrugged, pulling on a pair of sweatpants. "That's fine."

Roy risked a glance at him. He seemed to mean it, but it also sounded like he didn't fully believe him. Roy's instincts told him to insist on the no, make Ed incredibly aware that he would never, ever, get to put his dick anywhere near Roy's ass, but something made him pause.

Ed was already settling for Roy as it was, was Roy really going to make him settle even more by not giving him this experience? He seemed sure he wasn't into women—Roy couldn't make him go through life never having fucked someone, right?

Ed sighed, probably in response to his emotional chaos. "I was just joking."

"Do you want that?"

The question was out now. He couldn't take it back, and he hoped to God Ed didn't make him elaborate.

At Ed's silence, Roy looked at him, caught the serious way Ed was staring at him. "Yes." His heart damn near stopped. He didn't even hesitate— "But I don't mind if you don't want to right now, or never." He smirked, coming back over to the bed and shuffling closer on his knees. "I've gotten way more than I ever thought I would anyway, and I can't have everything I want."

Now was a good time to have that heart attack.

Roy averted his gaze and nodded.

Ed's hand touched his shoulder, and he crawled into his lap. "I only did it cause I knew you'd spaz out." He winced. "Sorry."

Roy wrapped his arms around him, holding close. "I don't know if I can do that, Ed."

Ed smiled at him. "That's fine, really." But then he smirked again, and his eyes glinted with some primal desire. "I think you'd like it though, if last night was any indication."

His face burned again.

Ed kissed him on the cheek, momentarily surprising him by how gentle and caring that gesture was, and hopped off his lap. "Come on, or you'll be late for work and you'll bitch at me again."