I missed out on posting this on Halloween, so I thought I would hold off until April 1st but... um... eh... not really a funny case this one. Few things I want to get out of the way first. This isn't my idea; it was orphaned on AO3, and I lifted it. The premise interested me, so I'll give it a crack. Not quite sure how well I can live up to the original intent, making the most fucked up story possible, I feel going all out would cross over into goofy, but I'll try to walk the fine line. Second, this isn't going to be for the faint of heart. If you feel like you need me to list off the trigger warnings, you might be better off elsewhere.

An aging clock ticked in the night, the only distraction for Lynn's nervous mind. She was combing her hair. The rhythm of the clock was only ever interrupted by an occasional hiss that came after Lynn drew the comb too harshly. To say she was a novice was a disservice to them. Dress up and makeup and all that they entailed were not on the list of her expertise, but for tonight, she would have to do her best for now she had drawn the short straw twice in life. First was when she was born. The second was last night. However, she didn't curse lady luck all that much. After all, it was time for Lynn to pay her dues and in all the possible ways, this one seemed like a less harmful one. However, who she did curse were her sisters, if for nothing else not staying to help her prepare.

The clock stopped ticking and started to buzz. Lynn turned to see what was happening and saw it had stopped. Low battery, she assumed. Whatever it was, it was about time for her to make a move anyways. Turning off the broken contraption, she put on a shirt so big it could be mistaken for a small dress and left the room.

Not far away, Lincoln was laying in his bed. He was having a hard time going to sleep. Ever since what happened to his parents, he had run out of numbers to count the days he didn't sleep well, but tonight was one of the worse days. Try as he might, he kept spinning around like a roasting pig. His grandfather had taken his sisters camping, leaving only him and Lynn at home. He said it to: "so you could relax a little," but that Lynn had to stay because: "you are still too young to be left alone for multiple days." The words his grandfather said replayed in his mind like a broke record. He was an experienced and wise man and Lincoln knew he was probably right, but he couldn't help not to make a mocking imitation of him now. Why did he leave only him and Lynn? He wasn't taking it that much worse than anybody else, but Albert didn't give them "alone" time.

A knock on the door interrupted Lincoln's thoughts. Lynn entered but were they not the only ones in the house Lincoln would have had a hard time discerning it was her. "Hey, Lincoln, do you mind if I bunk with you tonight?" She was scared and held her hands together."

"Is there something wrong?" Lincoln raised himself up slightly to see her better.

"No... I just forgot to get my sheets out of the laundry and now I have none." Lynn said," and before you ask, I'm not sleeping in Lucy's bed, it's a coffin."

"Okay, come in." Lincoln raised his sheet and moved a side to make room. He knew she was lying. Lynn was too proud to admit it, but she just needed someone to hold. They all did. It was just that now she had no one else to turn to. And, if he was being honest, he could use the same thing. He did his best to put on an act for his sisters. He was a boy, boys don't cry. His sisters, especially younger ones, needed some source of stability to cope with the loss and while his grandfather did that as best he could, the more stability there was, the better it would be for everyone.

Lynn climbed into the bed and Lincoln threw the covers over her. She snuggled close to him, a bit too close. Not wanting to make it awkward, Lincoln turned around and tried to sleep. However, Lynn pressed up against his back and wrapped her arms around his waist. It felt nice. He couldn't tell how long it had been since she last held him. It made him feel better, even though he was hugged excessively by each of his sisters. Something didn't seem right, however. Lynn's arms were going lower and lower and quickly became too encroaching to ignore. "Lynn... what are you doing?"

Her arms stopped, and she raised her head to his ear. "Lincoln, do you love me?"

"Of course, I love you, Lynn, you are my sister." He said, unsure if he should do something about her arms.

Lynn gently laid her hands over his crotch. "Do you trus-"

Lincoln jumped up and against the wall as soon as he felt her fingertips on his pants. "Lynn, what the hell?!" He covered his privates while backing up into the corner, to get as far away.

Lynn sat up on her knees, throwing the covers to the floor. In the dim moonlight, he could see her better. Her long brown hair was let loose but tucked behind her ears and thrown behind her back. Her eyes looked innocent, and her face disappointed. However, what made Lincoln forget her innocence were her clothes. She was wearing only an oversized shirt, and on it he could see two protrusions right where her breasts would be. He blushed when he noticed. He opened his mouth to say something, but nothing came to mind. Taking advantage of this, Lynn jumped on him and kissed him.

To my pleasant surprise, I woke up quietly, and fifteen minutes early. Careful not to disturb my partner, I got out of bed and walked over to the mirror. It had become a routine for me. Since it was on the way to the bathroom, I would often stop to admire my progress and before long it became a habit. And boy did he have something to admire. Growing up, I was a scrawny kid. But as I grew Albert had me take up exercise and quickly the hard work began paying off. Now I looked like a model, which was kind of a requirement for his job. While the primary object of my attention, my work wasn't the only thing that I would stop admiring. I was also well endowed and proud to say that it was in no part thanks to Lisa, as far as I was aware. It wasn't something you would see on a horse but was certainly far above the norm and who knows, maybe still developing.

Lynn jumped me from behind and locked me into a hug. Lincoln took her hands and started to turn around to kiss her. As they embraced, Lynn started stroking him, but after taking too long to get it up she gave up. "Eighteen too old for you?", her voice only half joking.

"It's not that, I'm just not in the mood right now, with the funeral and all." I put a step between us.

Lynn came onto him again. "I know a button I can push to get you in the mood."

Lincoln chuckled. "Maybe later."

She rolled her eyes and broke away. "You are lucky it's not just any hoe." She went over to the dresser and fished out a pair of shorts and a shirt. "For me, a month at the minimum." She said, going into the bathroom.

I followed her. "You're not going to the funeral?" I hopped straight into the shower.

"No," Lynn sat on the toilet, putting on her shorts and shirt while relieving herself. "I have a client later and I need to do my routine before that."

"Okay..." I said.

Lynn got up and waited for a minute. When I didn't start the water, she rolled her eyes. "Sissy." She brushed her teeth and left the room.

For all her quirks, he loved her dearly. Many might not see it, but every demon is, at heart, an angel and Lynn was no exception. Sure, there were times when she could be a bit... of a handful, but after all the stress at work and dealing with the family like theirs, who wouldn't. God knows he's always on the brink, and compared to him Lynn's fuse is negligible.

I dried myself off and brushed my teeth before putting on his bathrobe and leaving the room. I went around the couch to get the remote and turn the TV on, just to get some background noise on as I made breakfast. I tuned in just in time to see the police chief being interviewed by the press. "We are doing the best we can to ensure those responsible are apprehended and brought to justice. Royal Woods is a peaceful community, and we will do everything in our power to ensure it stays that way."

It would have been funny were it not real. If I had to guess, he was talking about the latest killing. What was that, third this month? Who even counted? For half a decade he watched him give the same interview over and over so many times that he had gotten tired of it. It was like he was an NPC. No matter if it was a murder, narcotics, robbery, or arson, he would give the same two sentences about how they would do everything to stop the perpetrators, when, in reality, he was getting the kickbacks from all of it. People had gotten used to it at this point and the charade was more for the outsiders to think something was being done. Locally, everyone knew what to do, more precisely, what not to do.

When the eggs were done, I put out two plates on the table, nibbling on my meal as I went to the staircase. "Breakfast's ready!" Shortly after, I heard a flush and two doors opening. Lola and Lana came down, both still in their sleeping wear, a night gown and birthday suit respectively. They shuffle down like zombies, guided only by the smell of food and muscle memory.

Lincoln watched them as I finished my plate. "You two have your dresses ready?"

Lola yawned and nodded.

"Do I have to?" Lana asked, yawning.

"Pop-pop picked those out." I said, leaving my plate in the sink before going back to the dining room. "I'll go get ready and when you're done and dressed, we can get going, okay?"

The two gave a dispassionate "Yeah."

I almost went upstairs, making me smile to myself. That closet was my room for so long I still end up wandering into it at times. A part of me misses it, but no part of me can deny my current situation is better. Once Lori and Leni had moved out and a room was free, we decided to move around. At that time, long enough had passed that we felt comfortable being in the master bedroom without needing a support team afterwards. So, Lynn and I moved downstairs.

After getting dressed, I went to the living room, where I found the twins waiting for me. Seeing as it was about time, we left for the car.

"Here lies Leni Loud." I read those words with disbelief, still. No matter how many times I did it, I could never fully comprehend it. My sister was gone, and at just twenty-one years of age.

I could say a lot about Leni. She was certainly a person that stuck out, but in a family of stuck-outs, that meant nothing. She was a bit dull but everything she lacked in intellect she made up for twice over in compassion and looks. She was a kind soul, and that was why, I thought, she was the first to go. I wondered if this was our fate, suicide? Our lives weren't exactly fulfilling at their best and the carrier choices left a lot to be desired. While the pay was great, it wasn't great enough for the job. Staring at her tombstone, I could easily see the letters move around, melt away, and reform to spell out my name. "One day," I thought, "one day."

Putting my flowers down, I stepped aside and left the twins to leave theirs. Going over to Pop-pop, I found him with Lisa and Lily, both in the same place as always. Lily was the youngest of us, and I felt guilty for even thinking it, but she got the leftovers when it came to genetics and when the previous ten siblings were all exceptional in one way or another, it left her with nothing. Lily was impaired to the degree that made them take back every joke they threw at Leni previously. Despite being seven, she still wore diapers and couldn't separate herself from Albert or her teddy bear. On every measurable metric, she never surpassed a three-year-old. Why we kept her around was beyond me. Many suggested she be sent to an institution more equipped to take care of her, staffed with people who spent their lives studying cases like hers and perhaps capable of helping her, if even a little. Albert, however, was opposed to it. Wheater it was his fear that it would bring some kind of shame to the family to have one of their own in a mental institution, or if he just didn't understand, I didn't know. I respected and followed his decision regardless. Albert wasn't perfect and he was certainly out of date in some aspects, but when everything was summed up, he was smarter, wiser, and more experienced than I would ever be.

Lisa was the opposite to Lily. If you were to walk into every Ivy league college and add up the IQ of everyone in there: professors, students, janitors, and visitors, you would still have an IQ lower than Lisa's. She was on a higher level than any of them. And while, yes, she had her own eccentricities, she was far more in line with what one would call autistic compared absolute mess that was Lilly. It was no surprise then that she was always in Albert's orbit. She knew full well who was the head of the family and as a result who wielded authority, status, money, and most importantly, who was the biggest treat to her having it all, me. As the only boy and a not-so-subtle favorite of Pop-pop's, I was the obvious successor, and Lisa didn't like that. Forget any talks of merit, intellect, or equality, she was just after the power, she wanted the empire, and she wouldn't settle with a duchy or even a kingdom. I, in turn, recognized her as my greatest treat. The rest of the sisters, while eyeing the position, were nowhere to be an actual threat to me. The race was firmly between me and Lisa and as long as I made sure she didn't poison me; I would come out on top. Because despite all the talk Albert espoused about merit and hard work, at the end of the day he was a man of his time, and his time was a lot less gender equitable.

"Hi, Pop-pop." I approached, trying to act as casual as I could. "Hey Lily." I smiled at her, as she hid behind Albert and screamed at me. There was nothing to be done, Albert was her favorite, and you would be hard pressed to find her away from him at a new place.

"Hi, sport, how are you doing?" Albert turned around a little to pet Lily on the head.

"Okay, all things considered." I said, "I still can't believe it though... it feels so sudden. One moment she is her happy self, the next she disappears for six months and then kills herself."

"You know how Leni was, what she got up to. Knowing her it is just as likely as anything that she fell off by accident." Albert said. "It is always a tragedy when it happens, but she knew what the job entailed. She understood the risks and she took them on. And, well... the results speak for themselves..."

"I guess they do." Lincoln sighed.

Albert picked up Lily and then put a hand on my shoulder. "You have nothing to worry about. You are strong, much stronger than her, stronger than any of your sisters."

"I know." I said. "I won't let you down Pop-pop."

"I know you won't." Albert said. "Now go home, and rest, I'll handle the geezers."

I nodded. "Yes, sir."

Once the funeral wrapped up, most of us returned home. Lori, Luna, and Luan were all there and they were having a mini reunion, if a little mute one. There wasn't much to talk about really. They met regularly enough that staying in touch wasn't an issue, so now they mostly exchanged pleasantries. While the "adults" talked, the twins went to their rooms, Lana barely waiting to enter the house to disrobe. Not that long after them, Lynn returned from her run.

Immediately, she went into the kitchen and drank some water. On the way out she passed by Lincoln. "Hi, Stinkin'," She kissed him on the cheek. "Be a dear and take these to the laundry." She said while heading upstairs and haphazardly throwing off her clothes.

"Sure thing!" I said enthusiastically, picking them all up.

My older sisters snickered, but at the slightest glance they pretended like they'd done nothing. Typical of them. They are jealous of how much attention I gives Lynn (women). I love them all, but they can't compare to Lynn. She is his first. She is the one that loves him the most. She is the one that cares for him the most. And to think that Luan dared to call him a simp. She didn't get halfway through a cuck joke before he slapped her back into her place. She was going to tell him something... If that was the case, then she should have been prepared to talk to his hand. Classic women. Albert was right about nearly all of them, they are nothing but whores, looking to an opportunity to jump on a good man and ruin him. His sisters were in large part like that. Willing to spread their legs for everyone, but never missing an opportunity to find another simp for their orbit. It was a pure miracle none of them had yet gotten a kid to leach of some poor lonely guy. They tried the same trick on him, probably believing it would win the favors with Albert. He, however, wasn't stupid. For him none of them were even suitable for a "W" form "wife", they were barely even deserving of a "W" from "woman". No, his heart belonged to Lynn, and he planned to officiate their status once he came of age.

Ignoring them, I went to the basement to put the clothes wash. Lucy was there, reading a book. As I entered, she turned a page before closing the book and getting up.

"Hi, Lucy." I said. "What are you reading?" I put Lynn's clothes in the basket with some other stuff.

"Nothing special." She answered, her voice flat. "I'll take care of that; you should go be with the others."

"Don't worry, it'll only take a minute." Lincoln said, opening the machine and tossing the clothes in before preparing the detergent. "I'm guessing you were watching from a distance."

"The funeral?" Lucy watched my every move. "No... I will go later today."

I turned the machine on. "I didn't really ask you this before, I just assumed you, being you, would take this whole thing better, but are you okay?"

"Yes." Lucy said. "Are you finished."

I glanced at the machine, watching it spin up. "Uh... yeah. Do you need help with something?"

"No... I just want to be alone." Lucy said.

I went to her, and he grabbed her hand. "You can talk to me if something is bothering you, I'm your brother." I said.

She pulled her hand out. "I am fine, I just prefer to read alone."

He grabbed her hands and pulled her closer. "If something is bother you, you can tell me, and I'll do everything I can to help." I said.

Lucy pulled her hands away and slithered past me. "I'm fine, I just want to be alone." She hurried upstairs. Leaving me alone.