A/N Mild dub-con reference. Nothing too bad, promise. It's just talked about in past tense and not shown.

Chapter 12

Sakura

Seventy-five days into the past

This was utterly ridiculous. She had only just given him the go-ahead for returning to work, and now he was going to get himself hurt again. But she couldn't say anything. Gai had waited until he was healthy again, like she'd asked.

So Sakura sat, arms crossed and knee jumping, by Tenzō as he calmly cheered Kakashi on. There were a few other people she recognized around, but as at least one of them was another ghost to her, she was doing her best to ignore them.

"Alright, rules: no Genjutsu, because that's boring for us," Genma leered at Kakashi before turning to Gai. "And no gate opening because that feels like cheating." He tapped his chin thoughtfully. "Anything else goes. BEGIN!"

The senbon-chewing jerk ran over to his spot beside Sakura. "So, Hana-san!" He got comfortable, taking his dango back from Tenzō as the fight began. "Who did you put your ryō on? I'm guessing the boyfriend?"

Sakura shot him a glare before turning back to the training field in front of them. "I didn't bet. I'm honestly not sure who will win, I've never seen either of them go all out. But I am worried he's going to get hurt again. I told him to be careful. I don't have any more vacation time to look after him so he'll end up at the hospital. Probably sharing a room with Gai."

Genma laughed. "He'd love that." He gave her a silly, teasing grin. "It was so sweet of you to take time off and give him such special attention. I know he loved that."

"Ugh, would you shut up? I'm trying to watch."

He laughed but Tenzō leaned around to answer his teammate. "He did enjoy it. Even before she agreed to be his girlfriend. Especially after."

She glared at the younger man too. "Tenzō!"

He only shrugged as Genma howled with laughter. "Is it not the truth? He even seemed unusually cheerful when we were training this week with you there. Have you two had sex yet? That might explain it."

Aghast, Sakura stared at him, slack jawed. They had not. Somehow, even though she had been sleeping over for more than a week, the topic hadn't even come up. "Tenzō, that is… not your business!"

"Hmm. Genma discusses his exploits often. Is that not normal?"

"No!"

The ground shook, and a thrill of electricity filled the air, causing all spectators to shield their eyes. When they could see again, Gai had been thrown back across the field—he'd hit a lightning clone. With only slight hesitation, looking around for his opponent, Gai leapt right back to it.

"Leave her alone, Genma. If you ruin this for Kakashi because you scare her off, it will be you and I out there. And I promise I'll kick your ass."

Genma rolled his eyes at Kurenai as she approached. "Oh I'm so scared. Besides, she's not going anywhere. Isn't that right, Hana-san?"

Irritated and a little embarrassed to meet the other kunoichi like this, Sakura shoved Genma from the wooden bleacher Tenzō had made much harder than necessary. "He's not wrong, even if he is annoying. Hi, my name is Hana. I don't think we've met." She held out her hand to the other woman as she climbed up to take Genma's seat.

She smiled brightly at Sakura. "I'm glad to hear it. I'm Yuhi Kurenai. I've known Kakashi since we were in the Academy. I don't know if you could call us friends… he tends to keep people at an arm's distance and isn't very social on the rare occasion he isn't working. But some of us, Gai, Asuma, myself… we care about him a lot."

Pausing, letting her eyes follow the fight, she sighed. "He's had a fucked up go of it, even for a shinobi. I don't know how much he's shared…" She glanced at Sakura with a question in her eyes. Sakura replied with a sad smile. "Honestly, we've been pretty worried about him for a while." After another sigh, Kurenai turned back to Sakura and smiled. "Gai mentioned he has seemed happier the last few times he's seen him. Not that he was ever a terribly expressive person even before his dad…"

Understanding what the other woman was trying to say, Sakura smiled too. She wouldn't be in Kakashi's life long, but she hoped that while she was, he would be happy. "So I've gathered. I hope I make him happy…"

"What about you? Does he do that for you?"

Feeling a blush creep up her face, Sakura tried to focus on the fight instead of Kurenai's knowing smirk. "He does."

The other woman laughed softly but was kept from making further comments when Aiko rushed up behind them, finally arriving after her shift. "Hana-san! It looks like I've missed quite a bit. Do they both still have all their limbs?"

Nudging Tenzō to make room, Sakura urged her friend to sit beside her. "They seem to be decently matched, and unfortunately they aren't holding back. I'm worried Kakashi is going to get himself hurt again. Did you bring your field kit?"

Aiko smiled, holding the pack up to show her. "Well if either of them get hurt, I'm sure we'll have them patched up in no time." Upon seeing Kakashi ignite his chidori and race towards Gai, neither of them more than streaks of color they moved so fast, Aiko gasped. "What are they even fighting about?"

Sakura could only sigh, leaning forward to drop her chin in her hand while Kurenai answered for her. "Gai and Kakashi have had this silly rivalry since they were kids, mostly in Gai's head, though Kakashi plays along. Well, about a week and a half ago, Gai asked Hana-san out on a date. I guess he beat Kakashi to it. Anyway, for some reason—" she gave Sakura an amused smirk that she studiously ignored, "—this one agreed. Well, Kakashi wasn't about to let that stand. So he had one of his ANBU teammates uh… temporarily incapacitate Gai so he could swoop in and take her on the date instead."

Kurenai chuckled. "It went well, and now they're together, but he still had to answer for cheating Gai in one of their contests. Apparently they are using the opportunity to really test each other. It's been a while."

"Wait…" Aiko leaned around so she could look excitedly into Sakura's thoroughly embarrassed face. "Mr. Tall, Stoic and Handsome asked you out?"

Sakura scoffed. "No. He incapacitated my date and showed up instead. But, yeah…" She couldn't fight the silly grin. "It's going well."

Aiko fairly squealed, not for the first time reminding Sakura of Ino. "Yay! I knew it! Tell me." She turned deadly serious. "Is he good in bed? He looks like he would be good in bed."

Sakura nearly choked, swinging her attention from the increasingly bloody fight to her friend. "Aiko?! What the heck? Why is everyone so interested?"

On Aiko's other side, Tenzō interjected dryly. "I already asked and was told that it is none of my business. Apparently not everyone shares quite so much as Genma."

At the mention of the other shinobi—still lying ten feet away on the ground and seemingly content to watch from there—Aiko blushed. "Oh, he shares a lot does he?"

"Do not worry. After he persuaded you into his hospital bed, he didn't bother any of the other nurses but you. He evidently enjoyed your company quite a bit, and is planning to ask you out on a real date. Two things that are very out of character for him."

Her jaw hung open, something Sakura corrected. "Oh, Aiko. That's terribly unprofessional."

The younger woman only scoffed. "Please. You took more than two weeks off to baby the most notorious patient this side of the mental ward in his home, and ended up sleeping with him by the end. You can't get mad at me for sleeping with a patient too."

Now it was Sakura's jaw that hung open. "We haven't even slept together yet! And even if we had, at least it wouldn't have been in his hospital bed."

"Ladies…" Kurenai was blushing and holding back a laugh, her eyes darting to the side where Asuma, another male shinobi Sakura did not recognize, and a now much closer Genma all stood with varying degrees of interest on their faces. Genma looked particularly smug.

Oh for fuck's sake.

"Hey, Aiko-chan?"

The medic in question shook off her embarrassment to lean around Sakura, the appropriate amount of mild interest on her face. "Can I help you, Genma-kun?"

He grinned, even reaching up to take the senbon from between his teeth. "Once these two idiots are done beating the shit out of each other, and you're all done helping Hana-san patch them up, you wanna get out of here? Maybe get something to eat…"

Aiko sat back slightly, smirking at Sakura before leaning forward again to smile. "Sure."

Genma nodded with a pleased little smile before everyone's attention was pulled back to the fight. It had devolved to vicious taijutsu. Kakashi was actually magnificent, performing acrobatic flips as he dodged Gai's powerful blows, the ringing of their kunai filling the air. In this, they seemed evenly matched. Gai landed a hit, his thigh colliding with Kakashi's side, tossing him back. Shaking it off, Kakashi dodged his second kick with a graceful back-flip, landing behind his opponent. Even though their taijutsu may be, Kakashi's Sharingan gave him the upper hand. Catching Gai's swinging arm, he kneed him hard in the ribs and swept his legs out from under him.

It must have been the final straw for the green clad nin who had already taken at least three hits of electricity. Gai was lying flat on his back. From where they sat, he looked like he was still conscious, but both he and Kakashi were bloodied. For his part, the copy-ninja stood over his opponent, hands on knees and breathing labored.

Leaping up from the bench, Sakura and Aiko crossed the training field to inspect the damage. Gai was in fact conscious. Laughing hoarsely at the sky. "I would have won if I could have opened the first gate, Kakashi."

"Sure." Noticing her, Kakashi straightened so she could inspect him for injury. "Are we good here, Gai?"

Huffing beneath Aiko's ministrations, Gai held up a weak hand, thumbs up. "You won this one, Kakashi—fairly this time." Both men winced at the same time as both medics made glowing handed passes across their ribs.

"Dammit, Kakashi," Sakura hissed, giving him an exasperated glare. "I've just given you the go ahead for work, we've got plans tomorrow, and your first mission back is the next morning! You've gone and broken a rib!"

Crouching beside Gai, Aiko sighed. "He's got two broken ribs, some minor muscle strain in both arms, a fair bit of singed skin and hair, and a concussion. For fuck's sake."

Finding no damage to his Sharingan nor any recurring head trauma, Sakura dropped her hands to her side and glared. "Honestly, what am I going to do with you?"

He reached for her, fingers catching the fabric of her skirt. There was remorse in his eyes—mismatched and blinking down at her—and something else, something warm and just for her. It made her soften toward him immediately, a tired sigh escaping her lips. Damn handsome man.

"Hana… let's go home."

She couldn't argue with that. His hands fell away from her skirt as some of the others made their way over but Sakura let Gai and Aiko fill them in. With a nod to a grinning Kurenai, she let Kakashi wrap his arms around her, form a few hand signs, and flash-step them away.

KSK

Kakashi watched her intently as she reknit his rib. Sitting beside him on his bed, several different things circulated through Sakura's head—at least two of which were making her blush.

He had called his apartment "home", insinuating that it was their home. She had, despite her mother's sage advice, been staying there all week. Her toothbrush sat beside his on his bathroom sink, the shampoo he'd picked out was in his shower. There was even some of her laundry hanging out to dry with his on the balcony.

They were not living together. But… would it really be so bad if they were? Under normal circumstances, with no knowledge of the future, it would definitely be too soon. But the idea of sleeping alone when they both went back to work, knowing what she did, made her feel a little sad.

Then there were Aiko and Tenzō's ridiculous questions. Despite sleeping close in his bed, it hadn't come up. Every time their kissing and touching started to get heated, by some unspoken agreement they both slowed down. Maybe neither of them were ready for that.

There was the familiar flash of empty, dark eyes that always haunted her when she thought about sex. Kakashi was nothing like him, despite sharing a generally bored attitude. She could tell from the way he watched her when they were alone, from the way he kissed her, that when they did take that step the two experiences would be planets apart.

"Sakura…"

Torn from her thoughts, Sakura flinched, smiling over at him apologetically. "Hmm, yeah?"

The corner of his mouth was turned up in an amused half smile. "What are you thinking about? Your face almost matches your dress."

"Uh…" Aiko's knowing, curious smirk came to mind and she felt the blush intensify. "It's—" Redoubling her focus on his mostly healed side, Sakura told him what their friends had said. "Both Tenzō and Aiko asked me if we'd had sex yet." She couldn't look at him, she could not. "Thanks to Genma, Tenzō was under the impression that that was an appropriate thing to ask about. And Aiko is apparently something of a female version of Genma, because—not only did she ask—she also inquired how you were, because, and I quote: 'he looks like he would be good in bed.' Honestly."

Kakashi snorted, laughing softly. "Genma is a terrible influence."

Sakura could only stare at him curiously, interested in the answer to Aiko's question despite herself. Catching her look, he sobered somewhat and ran a hand through his hair—though the smile did not fully leave his face. "Anyway, her guess is as good as mine. I don't really remember, to be honest."

What? Sakura felt herself frown in confusion. "How do you not remember? Did the concussion affect your memory?" She reached a glowing hand towards his temple, only for him to huff a laugh and catch her wrist.

"No." He paused, seemingly debating whether or not to tell her. Releasing her wrist, he buried both hands in his hair. "When I turned eighteen, Genma dragged me over to his place for a 'birthday present'. We'd had a string of especially bad missions so I guess I was feeling too apathetic to care what he was up to. Anyway, after he'd gotten me to knock back half a bottle of sake, these two girls he knew showed up. They kept pouring me drinks and then at some point, I was mostly naked and they were kind of… everywhere. I don't really remember anything more specific than that."

Oh. Oh! Sakura was so horrified all she could do was stare at him, open mouthed. When she didn't say anything, he glanced down at her from where he'd been staring at the ceiling.

"What?"

"Kakashi that's… did you want them to do any of that to you?"

He only shrugged. "I don't think I really cared. I was…" Something that looked painfully like shame flickered across his face and he looked away as if unable to meet her eyes. When he continued after a sigh—the detached, almost amused tone was gone—his voice hardly more than a whisper. "I was a lot more self-destructive back then, Sakura. I just didn't really care. Genma said I needed to relax, so I let it happen."

He didn't seem to have many feelings at all about what—if he were a woman—would definitely be considered sexual assault. She wasn't entirely sure it wasn't anyway. But the way he used to be, how much he hated living, hated himself… that he was ashamed to share with her. It made her heart ache for him. Desperately, Sakura hoped their son would be enough to keep him from sinking back to those old feelings when she was gone.

He must have taken her silence for continued concern. She had been staring at him as her thoughts wandered. Squeezing her hand, he pulled her attention back to himself. "Hey, don't worry about it. I wasn't so drunk that I couldn't have left when I realized what was happening if I really cared one way or the other."

Pushing the sadness away, she smiled—a little weakly—and shook her head. "I believe you." Thinking of Sasuke, she shuddered. When he noticed, looking up at her with concern, she forced out a brittle laugh. "And I thought my one and only experience was bad. Sometimes I wish I'd been too drunk to remember."

Now he definitely looked concerned, a deep frown marred his face as he tried to sit up. Shit. "I shouldn't have worded it like that." Bracing his shoulder, she gently forced him to lie back down. "It's not… it's not what you're thinking."

"Hmm…" He nodded and got comfortable again. "Red scroll mission?"

That did make her laugh. "No. I almost wish it was." She shook her head and ran her hands through her hair. "It might have been less terrible, actually."

The frown was back. "Sakura, we don't have to do this. I admit, now you have my attention, but you don't have to tell me if you don't want to. I only shared because it wasn't a big deal to me and it seemed like maybe you were curious."

Blushing again, Sakura tried to brush off his concern. "I guess I kind of was. But it's OK. I'm making it sound worse than it was. Mine was fully consensual, at least." She shot him a teasing look before focusing on his hand in hers. "The boy I imagined I was in love with since I was six…. Well there is kind of a lot to our relationship between six and eighteen but I can't really get into that. Basically, he was always kind of uninterested in anything that wasn't his all consuming life long mission, including me." Understatement of the century.

"Well, when that was dealt with, he finally seemed to reciprocate my feelings." She fell quiet, contemplating how best to explain without comparing the two men. "The thing about Sas… about him was that he wasn't what anyone would ever call warm or emotionally available. The words 'cold', or 'distant', or 'bored with life' might have been used."

Kakashi huffed, drawing her attention again with a self-deprecating, wry grin. "Well, you certainly have a type."

"Oh, no…" She reached for the hand he'd taken back to comb anxiously through his hair. "I guess there might be a few similarities in how you carry yourselves in public… and your traumatic childhoods. But you eventually grew up and out of the all consuming bitterness and anger. He never did."

Squeezing her hand again, he nodded for her to continue. "Anyway, we were finally together, but he was still his usual distant self, even with me. For some reason, I thought he'd be different if… well, when I let him—" She cringed. That sounded wrong. "When we were together, he was the same. He was so… cold. His eyes were so dark and empty. It was like, even then, he felt nothing. If there hadn't been evidence, I would have sworn he didn't get anything out of it at all. I certainly didn't."

This time when he sat up, she didn't stop him. He winced as he adjusted himself so he was leaning against the wall beside her. The hand she wasn't holding combed through her hair, but he didn't say anything.

"Well, as you can probably guess, that was the end of that crush. Thankfully he left town not long after that and hadn't been back by the time I disappeared."

They both sat there quietly for a while, Sakura eventually dropping her head to rest on his shoulder.

"I know I don't have any real experience, but I don't think it's supposed to be that way."

She smiled, leaning into him. "No. Kakashi… I know this is new, but…" Pulling back just enough, she looked up at him with a nervous smile, his forehead pressing against hers. "I know it will be different with you. There is more feeling, more emotion in the way you watch me when I'm standing across the room, in the way you play with my hair… when you kiss me awake—" She paused, embarrassed but wishing he would kiss her already. "Then I have ever felt before."

"Hmm." There was color dusting his pale cheeks and his eyes were locked on her lips. Kiss me, please! "Sakura I…" He paused, running his tongue along his teeth. When she looked into his eyes, both open for once, whole speeches could be written with the different emotions and thoughts she saw behind them. "When you're ready, I would very much like to show you you're right."

Gasping, and desperate for him, she leaned in, his lips crashing into hers. The hand that had been in her hair cupped the back of her head, holding her close. The other draped her arm around his shoulders before wrapping around her waist, dragging her into his lap.

Letting her thighs fall on either side of his, Sakura pressed herself fully against him. A breathy moan escaped her when she felt him beneath her. He wanted her. The sounds she made seemed to encourage him, his lips leaving hers to travel down her neck. The front of her qipao opened easily and his exploration continued. Sakura clung to him, her hands scraping through his hair.

Suddenly he froze, a hiss of pain escaping between clenched teeth. The hand that had been cupping her ass rubbed frantically at his side. Fuck. "Oh Kakashi! I'm so sorry, are you ok?" She slid off of him, helping him lie on his back again. "I forgot… dammit. I'm sorry…" Her hands were glowing and she was soothing the spasm, so focused she didn't see the pained smile on his face.

"It's… it's OK, Sakura." He was laughing, but it sounded more like gasping coughs. "I forgot too."

Satisfied he hadn't reinjured himself, she sighed but started laughing too when their eyes met. "Maybe you should take it easy tonight? I'm not going anywhere."

His smile froze and a very out of place thread of sorrow darkened his eyes but he blinked hard and it was gone. It happened so fast she might have imagined it. "Yeah… come here."

He opened his arms to her and she didn't hesitate to give him what he wanted. "You want to sleep for a while? I can make something later if we're hungry."

"That sounds perfect."

A/N So. I am not a smut writer. There will be little tastes here and there of course. Once these two get going they're going to be pretty horny for each other. I just don't like to plop my chair beside characters beds and watch what's going on. I'm more of a, hang out while they're getting started then dip out when my face gets too red lol