Chapter 1: The Heroes' Final Stand… For Real This Time

The City of Altdoof.

At long last. After three games, a swath of DLCs and a cadre of maps and custom campaign made by our beloved hardworking fans, the Absolute Evil finally arrived at the City of Altdoof. It is here where the last remaining heroes have gathered to make their final stand.

"Are you absolutely sure about that?" Thalya said mockingly as she appeared out of the dungeon entrance.

Of course I'm sure.

"It's just that you said the same thing about the whole 'Last Stand' in the other two games and it never is. There's always another city on the horizon or another continent in a faraway land that no one's ever heard of. Next thing you know we'll be conquering the heavens themselves. Oh wait…"

Well, I can assure you that this is indeed the final stand of the heroes. There are no more places for you to conquer or dominate.

"You absolutely sure?"

Of course I'm sure! Here, it's on this very script that… oh hang on.

…

…

…

Well this is embarrassing. It appears I have misplaced the script.

"You mean you lost it."

'Misplaced' my dear. Oh well. It shouldn't really matter. I already read the ending. Kind of overly dramatic if you asked me. Let's just treat this like any other skirmish mission. Build up the dungeon, raise an army of whatever evil force your heart desire, destroy the heroes, level their buildings, and win some achievement that no one actually cares about.

"Meh. Sounds about right. After this I'm petitioning for a long vacation. That church over there does look perfect for a spa."

Oooh. Good idea. I'll pack my sunscreen.

But Thalya will not have it easy, as her foster brother Tristan leads the defense of the city."

"Tristan!? Him again? I thought we had an agreement that he'll sod off to some remote island and become a hermit?"

"Ha! That's what you think, dear sister." Tristan responded even though he was standing across the map deep behind the line of heroes and walls. "I would never neglect the innocent in need of protection. So long as I am here, evil will never triumph. I swore to protect these people and this land from your encroaching darkness."

"Ugh… seriously Tristan. Just how many times do I have to pound this into your head? In the entirety of the game, you've never beaten me once. And the one time you even almost did, you resurrected Tanos, who was an even bigger evil than me! And that's saying something!"

"Sh… shut up! There's always a first for everything. Besides. I don't need to defeat you here. I know full well that my heroes cannot defeat you in combat. So instead… we're going to run away."

As soon as Tristan finished that sentence, a mighty portal strangely familiar to that of World of War(making) opened behind him. A large column of people ready themselves to pass through.

"This portal will send the good people of Altdoof to a far off land. Where they can resettle and rebuild, away from your evil clutches. This will build off to the next sequel game where they will return stronger than ever!"

"Ha! Sucks to be you Tristan. Because we all know that this is the final level of the game. And I've already built a fully functioning dungeon. Just you wait. I'm gonna kick your ass so badly and send you off to daddy dearest. Forward creatures! Destroy the gate, level the walls, poke their eyes out, and give'em noogies till their hair fall off."

Ah yes… another one of your 'Inspiring' speeches.

"Oh shut up. This is the last mission for crying out loud. I've already gone through that whole heck of the Gauntlet of Finitude. So cut me some slack."

Eh… I suppose so.

And so the Absolute Evil's army pressed on. With a mighty roar, the evil tide appeared from the dungeons. Wave of horde creatures pounded at the city's defenses, while demon launched devastating magic from behind. The necrotic undead rose from the graves within the city, catching the defenders off guard. And with every creature slain, they were all so easily replaceable.

"That's right you lot! Put your backs into it! I want that city leveled before sundown. I plan to lay on the beach when this is all over."

"Hold fast, my warriors! The Goddess has spoken to me. We are not defeated yet!"

"For the last time: I killed your Goddess!"

"Lies! She speaks to me still. Her voice clamors for our victory!"

Sadly, that was not the case. Despite the best effort of the heroes, the defenders could barely hold back the armies of Thalya. They seemingly folded away, trampled by hammering weight of the dark forces.

"Hammering weight? What the heck is that supposed to mean? Are you losing your touch Narrator?"

I was improvising. It's hard to recall my lines when I don't have a script in front of me. Just be glad I'm narrating at all. Otherwise the readers will have to imagine everything that's happening around here.

"Fair enough. Forward creatures! Destroy this city! And someone tell the snots back in the dungeon to ready my bath. I think I might actually work a sweat."

Seriously though. Where did I put that script?

"My brothers!" Tristan roared in a panicked moot. "In your eyes I see the same fear that would lead me to despair. The day may come when the courage of true heroes is extinguished, when we abandon our companions and all bonds of friendship are broken! But that day is still far off! Stand fast, Heroes of Altdoof!"

This again? Come on man. It's the last mission of the game. Put some effort into your speeches. There's only so much the players can take before they add a skip button to your sentences.

"Uh… I'm not really allowed to improvise in the middle of the mission."

Well unless you want to be known as the 'Forgettable' boss in this franchise, you'll put the effort.

"Oh… um… ok. I pledge to…"

Skip.

"Hey!"

After an immense effort by the Impatient Evil, the gates of Altdoof fell. The cannons and siege weapons that held the creatures back were now all but destroyed leaving only the few heroes to hold the line.

"What!? Already? But the stage just started!"

But alas it was a futile effort. The defenders could do little but to become cannon fodder for the marauding armies of evil. Slowly each and every building within the city caught on fire, and spawn points for the good forces collapsed under mysterious circumstances.

"Hold on! I need those to spawn more heroes!"

And then suddenly, if that wasn't enough, a tunnel suddenly opened at the center of the city. From there, wave after wave of undead reinforcement poured forth. Ghosts and ghouls struck, causing mayhem.

"That's not fair! How am I supposed to hold off against such overwhelming forces!? Those skeletons are at least level 14! My heroes are barely pass level 2!"

With such weakling forces, the amateur heroes fell before the undead legion.

"Damn it! Everyone fall back! Back to the portal! We must protect it!"

But it would prove useless as another tunnel unearthed beneath the city. This one pouring demons of extraordinary levels.

"Oi, Narrator." Thalya spoke. "I don't normally say this. But isn't that a little unfair? I mean… this is supposed to be the last mission. We gotta give the player a little bit of a challenge."

Do you want to get that spa treatment before sundown or not?

"Forward creatures! Destroy the city! Destroy the portal! Leave no one standing!"

Before long, the last bastion of the city fell to the hammering darkness.

"Again with the hammering darkness?" Thalya sighed.

Yes well… if neither you or Tristan are willing to put any effort, why should I? Come on. We're nearing the end. Just do your dramatical speech between you and your brother and finish him off. I already got my bags packed. And the animation team really made a number on the ending CGI.

"Oh. This should prove interesting."

At long last, the final confrontation between Thalya and her foster brother Tristan is at hand.

"Tristan, my dear brother. Looks like your last stand wasn't much of a last stand after all. More like… a last humiliation."

"Thalya! You vile evil creature you. Have you no shame to what you've…"

Skip.

"Well it doesn't matter. So long as…"

Skip.

"With the power of friendship, I will…"

Skip.

"Nothing will…"

Skip.

"Because that is…"

Skip.

"WILL YOU STOP SKIPPING MY LINES!? I have worked hard getting the mood right. And my screen time is being chopped to bits here!"

Sorry about that. It's just we're kind of in a hurry. And no offense. But beating you again and again has become somewhat… stale.

Thalya nodded in agreement. "Yeah. Got to agree with the Narrator there. It was fun when it all started. But beating you has been getting old. I mean… what else is there other than gathering more heroes and sending them to the slaughter?"

"You… you… you are just so… insolent! I have had it with your ungratefulness! And your insults! I will not be the punching bag of this series, so help me Goddess!"

"And again… I killed your damn Goddess." Thalya groaned. "When are you going to get it through your damn head? This is starting to feel like a recurring joke. And not a good one either. Face it brother. We've come to the end of the game. Now… be a good little final boss, and give a last heroic death so we can skip the credits and get on with our vacation."

"Oh you think you're so smart. Are you, sister? But sadly for you, I've prepared something special for this occasion. Behold!"

"What's that? A scroll? Is that your last will or something?"

No… wait a second. That's… that's my script!

"WHAT!?"

How on earth did you get that!?

"Ha! I got it when you were off on your 30 minute bathroom break." Tristan roared. "The Goddess showed me the way, and gave me instructions on how to use it."

Hold a minute Tristan. Let's not do something hasty here.

"No! For this whole game I've been nothing more than a joke to all of you! Well not anymore. With this parchment. With this power! I will become something far more. At the least far more than a joke to all of you! I will change the ending right here, right now!"

"Tristan, no!"

But Thalya's warning came far too late.

What the hell?

Tristan's writing on the parchment sent a ripple in the universe. With a single change to the script, the story has been remade. The sick twisted drama of his defeat at the hands of his sister, undone, altered forever.

Who is saying that?

But little did he realize… that his actions this day… shall doom him and his world… forever.

"Narrator…? What's going on?"

I… don't know.

"Wh… what's happening? I feel…"

Tristan's words rung hallow as the sky blackened with a mighty storm. The portal behind him swirled, swallowing the 'Script' into its void. The elven champion barely had a chance to acknowledge them before he found himself… changing.

"Tristan!"

"Thalya…arghhh!"

The young elf's body twisted and bent, muscles growing on all sides while thick smoke bellowed from his mouth. It was a great change, a great and violent revolution. For all of it signaled 'His' arrival.

"Whose arrival!?"

With a bolt of lightning, he came. With glistening black armor, visage so frightening that it scares even the bravest of men.

"Witness me mortals!" It spoke with a strong terrifying voice. "Tremble before my breath, and cower before my gaze. Death and destruction has come for your world. For I am the one and true, Supreme EVIL!"