Night Three

The four of them decided to play games on Sunday night. Everyone was feeling better, and there wasn't much else to do. There was an almost tangible annoyance at having to be up for work the next morning, and wasn't something they were entirely used to yet. They didn't have 9-5's and clocking in when they'd been castaways. Even Juliet, the only one of them to have worked while on the island, hadn't held consistent hours day to day.

By the end of the night, Sorry! lay in pieces on the dining room table (and next to it), after Jin shoved the board in frustration. James called him a Wookiee - clearly the man did not like to lose - before calling it quits for the night, for everyone's sake.

Juliet excused herself to go get ready for bed as Jin grumbled, cleaning up the pieces. Despite last night (and, subsequently, this morning), she and James had had a fairly normal day. Not much seemed to have changed between them (despite the small, burning kernel of doubt that relayed the opposite - that in fact, everything had changed).

She brushed her teeth slowly, wondering what she should do now. She felt trapped in a way; she'd made a fool out of herself last night in a moment of weakness. Her room wasn't that cold. They lived on a tropical island. She was actually surprised James had believed her sorry excuse to crawl into his bed. (She was even more surprised that she'd had the guts to attempt such a thing in the first place.)

Her room certainly wasn't cold now. In fact, it was almost sticky with the island humidity seeping in through the broken window. There was no way she could use the same excuse again.

She changed into her pajamas and moseyed around, straightening up. She felt like an idiot, waiting for – what, exactly? James wasn't beholden to her. It didn't matter that she'd slept like a rock last night, he owed her nothing. This didn't have to be more than a one-time thing.

(Perhaps that was just hope, disguised as acceptance.)

Sighing, Juliet crawled into bed and clicked off her bedside lamp. Her door was cracked, and she could see flickers in the light beyond. She could see a flash of shadow walk past her room, could hear the groaning of the wooden floors under footsteps and a sneeze in the distant living room. All signs that her housemates were still awake. Or at least, some of them were. She wondered if James had retired to his bedroom yet.

She laid with her eyes open, debating with herself about what she should do now. But there wasn't much of a debate, really. She needed to go to bed. She was getting tired, and there was no way in hell last night had set some kind of precedent. It was a one-time thing, and she needed to wrap her mind around that once and for all.

She wasn't sure how much time had passed when she heard a soft knock on her door. She wasn't asleep; she'd only needed to shift positions twice in the duration of her lying there alone. When she opened her eyes to see who was at the door, she noticed for the first time that all the lights were finally out and the house seemed still. Clearly everyone else had followed her lead.

Everyone but James. He stood there in her doorway in loose pajama pants and no shirt. She could only tell it was him by the way he flicked his hair out of his face, and the vague outline of him shifting nervously with his hand still on the doorknob.

"Juliet?" he whispered, and Juliet raised her head to try to get a better look at him.

"James?"

"You awake?"

She was tempted to say that she had in fact been asleep before he'd interrupted her, but her voice would betray her if she did. She hadn't even been close. (She didn't want to focus on why that was. Why, after only one night, she struggled to find her best fit on her bed all alone.)

"I was just falling asleep, I think," she lied. She wasn't sure why she felt like she had something to prove.

He paused a second, shifting his weight again. The floorboards creaked. Juliet sat up further, trying to see the expression on his shadowed face.

"Mind if…? Well, ya want some company?"

Juliet's face split into a bashful grin before she ducked her chin, trying to force her lips back together. She wasn't sure if he could see her or not. "Do you?"

He stepped into the room, softly shutting the door behind him. "Hey, I'm not the one who's gotta sleep in the cold. I figure I'm the one doin' you a favor, keepin' ya warm and all." He slid into the bed next to her, and Juliet shivered with nervous anticipation.

This was something he wanted. He could clearly tell, just as well as she could, that the room was nowhere near cold. He was lying in the same way that she was. To each other, to themselves - she wasn't quite sure which. (Maybe both.)

"What ever would I do without you," she droned, and flipped onto her side to face him. The sarcasm was heavy on her mouth, more obvious and pronounced than she usually let on. But it was amusing, playing this little game with him.

"Freeze to death, probably," he murmured, and a secret smile bloomed in his eyes as he got comfortable.

He flopped down onto his side too, facing her. There was a healthy distance between them, but something profound passed through the comfortable silence as they took one another in, just vague shapes and heat in the darkness.

Juliet had one leg sticking out of the covers, and was clad in only a tank top and shorts. James had the blanket up to his waist, but his entire chest was uncovered. It was quite possibly going to be a sauna in this room, his body heat mingling with hers; of this they were both quite aware. But neither mentioned it. Neither wanted to break the illusion that had been cast over their intentions.

(Worth it, she thought idly, and took in the taut skin of his bare chest without complaint.)

If he could tell what she was doing, he said nothing about it. For all she knew, he could be doing the same to her.

It made her chest feel tight - too tight - and she was desperate to breathe through the growing intensity of this conversation, this moment. This whole fledgling arrangement made her feel every nerve ending in her body all at once, and as overjoyed as she was to have had him choose this, choose coming to her, it felt… big. Bigger than she was willing to face, at the moment. She needed to snap the rubber band, growing tighter by the minute.

"Mhm. Well, if you'll excuse me, I was almost asleep before you so rudely interrupted." Juliet closed her eyes for emphasis, despite her fluttering heart. It felt good to tease him, to hear his soft chuckle and know that the flirtation was just that – mindless flirtation. It was natural for him. He didn't mean anything by it. It would do her good to remember that.

"Were ya now?" James guffawed, and Juliet's eyes flew back open.

"Yes. I was."

His mouth twitched and he leaned in closer to her. "Ya don't sound all that tired to me."

"And how do I sound, James?"

She couldn't make out his expression, but she could see him watching her through slitted, suspicious eyelids. "Kinda like a bird."

She gasped. Of all the things she'd expected him to say, that had not been one of them. "A – what?"

He grinned. "Your voice. It's all… high, like. Like a bird."

"I don't–" She searched for the right words, trying to refocus her thoughts. He'd thrown her off-guard. "I just meant… you can't just say I'm not tired because I don't sound like it."

"Okay. So you're tired."

"Yes. I am. I came to bed, didn't I?"

He shrugged a shoulder lazily before leaning in a little. "But yet here ya are. That was over an hour ago, Blondie. You still look wide awake to me."

Juliet scoffed under her breath. "What, is it against the rules to spend some time thinking before bed?"

James chuckled. "Thinking? That what the kids're callin' it these days?" He waggled his eyebrows suggestively.

She could feel the heat burning her cheeks as realization settled in. What he was insinuating– Oh, god. "With the door cracked? Really? You and I are not the same in that department, James." She took in a ragged breath, desperately trying to tether her mind to the here and now. Trying to lasso her imagination and keep it from running absolutely wild with fantasies. "You of all people know the house rule: Door closed and locked unless you want to get caught." It was because of him that they'd even had to make that a house rule.

James shrugged one shoulder, unphased. "For that, sure. Didn't think there were any other rules, for this little… experiment, we seem to have goin' on."

"That's because there aren't any."

He inched slightly closer, pushing his arm beneath his pillow to better support his head. From her position, she had to look up into his face. "Mmm. Maybe there should be."

Juliet blinked. What? Rules? What was he getting at? Was this… going to be a long-term thing? "What makes you say that?"

He sighed through his nose, eyes fluttering shut. She could practically see the tension leaving his body, his muscles loosening and growing heavier beside her. It was like watching ice melt on a hot day; he was becoming one with her bed.

"This. Whatever this arrangement is. We shouldn't just pretend it ain't happenin'."

"It's been two nights."

"Three," he corrected, and his mouth quirked up in the corner.

"Okay fine, three."

"Three in a row, if we're bein' exact."

Juliet's mouth fell open. "Okay. Three nights in a row we've slept in the same bed. It doesn't mean anything." She was grateful for the darkness. There was no way he could see the deep flush rising up her chest.

That, and the fact that his eyes were still blissfully closed. "The floor wasn't a bed, but I get what you're sayin'."

Juliet rolled her eyes.

"But fact 'a the matter is," James continued with a content sigh, "We gotta figure out what's alright and what ain't, so we don't step on each other's toes."

Juliet swallowed the urge to confirm: was this really happening right now? Was he really insinuating that this was something that was going to keep happening?!

Her heart slammed against her breastbone, and she bit the inside of her cheek to keep herself from saying anything stupid. She was already forcing flippancy into her tone, she didn't want to go too far and sound callous.

What did this mean? Did he like her, or was he just happier being beside someone rather than all alone? Was this going to be an 'every night from now on' thing? And if so, why? How?

But the biggest question of all, and perhaps the one that baffled her the most was: since when was she someone who provided him safety and comfort? When did she stop being the person who he'd wanted to screw over and betray the first second he got?

She swallowed against the unease, the mild skepticism. "We certainly wouldn't want to cross any boundaries," she agreed, and it felt like the right thing to say. She didn't want to scare him off with the rabbit hole she'd tumbled down into.

"So… we figure out the rules, then. You go first."

His eyes were still closed, but he seemed like he wasn't going to doze off any minute. So Juliet considered. She chewed on her bottom lip, trying to think of the one rule that was the most important to her. She thought about how much shit they'd get if Jin and Miles found out. How they might say something to convince James of how horrible of an idea this was. How he should be waiting around for Kate, not warming Juliet's bed instead. They might scare him off, and that was the complete opposite of what Juliet wanted.

"We keep this to ourselves for a while," she offered in a small voice. She didn't want to justify her reasoning. This was all embarrassing enough.

James nodded against the pillow. He didn't seem to need an explanation. "No Miles or Jin. Got it."

"What about you? What do you need for this… whatever… to work?"

His lips pursed, like he was thinking. "Mmm… Leave the door cracked if ya want company. Like a signal of sorts. Close it if ya wanna be alone, so the other person don't bother ya."

"Is that why you came by? Because my door was cracked?" she breathed.

He said nothing for a few seconds, as if debating. "Yeah."

Juliet pushed the edge of the blanket against her face to stifle her grin. "And what if the second person wants to go to sleep alone?"

"Then… ya just, go to your own room, then."

"So no obligations?"

"Nope."

Juliet adjusted her position on the bed, lying flat on her back and looking up at the ceiling. No obligations. It was only fair. They weren't together. This was just… a mutually beneficial arrangement. They were seeking comfort, companionship, on an island of strangers. Nothing else. "You work late some nights," she murmured. "So, another rule could be we don't have to go to sleep at the same time. You don't have to stay up for the other person unless you want to."

"'Course," James agreed and slid his hand under her pillow, until his forearm was under her neck. The action was purposeful, testing the boundaries they were actively writing between them. He was seeing how far she'd let him go.

"Oh. And… no… you know, in the other person's bed." She thought of his insinuation a few minutes ago, of what she might have been doing to pass the time before bed. She thought of Jin, screaming angrily in Korean, when he'd found James in the bathroom without the door locked; of James shouting right back at him to 'get the hell out,' and the tension that had lingered for days before finally Miles, of all people, had been the one to bring it up at a house meeting.

She thought it might make him laugh, to bring it back up in the context of their conversation. This was already awkward enough, what they were agreeing to here, and she wanted to remind him just where that boundary line was drawn. As much as she might want it, they weren't a couple. They were sharing a space at night, because they were two consenting adults and they could. But it ended there.

James's resounding laugh shook the whole bed, at rule number four. The tension, it seemed, had been successfully cut, and she felt a little more at ease with where this was going.

"Sweetheart, I don't give a rat's ass what you do in my bed." His eyes finally flew open, and they twinkled in the darkness. She turned her head, staring directly into them as he watched her, clearly amused. "Mi casa, su casa. Or whatever the Spanish word for bed is."

Heat pooled in her belly, and she was struck with a powerful image of grinding into her own hand, surrounded by James's scent, his bedding. Touching herself where he touched himself. It was overwhelming, and it stole her breath away as she looked back up to the ceiling. A shiver passed over her skin, goosebumps rippling in its wake.

What was even happening right now? They were going from enemies to acquaintances, to perhaps friends, and then…? Did 'friends' cuddle at night like this? She'd never done this with anyone in her life, outside of boyfriends. So why was he trying to pursue this with her, when she'd barely even consider them closer than roommates?

Or maybe… maybe that was why he was doing this. Maybe he was lonely, and he missed Kate. Maybe him pursuing this had nothing to do with him being interested in her, and everything to do with him looking for a suitable substitute. Any other woman in Dharmaville would jump at the chance to be with him, but Juliet was the only one who knew the truth. She was the only one who he didn't have to pretend around. And she supposed that made her a bit of a rare commodity.

Her logic hurt, no matter how rational it was. It didn't matter how much of a crush she had on him. There was just no way he was in this for anything other than physical comfort, both sexual and not. James was a physical person, she'd come to learn. There was no way this meant as much to him emotionally as it did to her.

"And… rule number five," Juliet sighed, hardly believing she was saying this. "No being handsy. If we end up cuddling… it needs to remain platonic. Okay? We should stop things before they cross any lines."

Just because it felt right to add, didn't mean it hurt any less to say.

James's lip twitched, the only reaction to what Juliet had said. She had no idea what it meant, but she suspected that it meant she'd been right. That maybe he'd just been hoping to get laid out of all this.

Her heart wouldn't be able to handle it; him touching her and thinking of Kate. She'd fracture under his hands, and she wasn't sure she had it in her to put herself back together when it was done.

"If you say so," he conceded, and now Juliet could tell his words were starting to slur. He was falling asleep.

"So, you're okay with the rules?"

He nodded, and then bent his head forward until it almost touched hers. Inch by inch, he was gravitating toward her. His knee pressed against the side of hers, and her head now rested firmly in the crook of his elbow beneath the pillow.

Juliet turned over onto her other side, facing away from him. Despite his even breathing, James's arm snaked over her ribs, pinning her against him. It was warm between them, but not overly so. It dragged her down, enveloping her until she was weightless and soaring.

He'd been right, that first morning. Sleeping beside James was the best sleep she'd gotten in months.

—-

A repetitive buzzing noise woke them both up the next morning. Juliet had to claw her way out of her blissful dream to find the source of all that racket, but before she could do anything about it, James's hand shot out to slap the snooze button on her bedside clock. The room descended back into silence, and the urgency faded away into the ether.

Her skin was dewy, the covers kicked onto the floor. The room was washed in a cheery yellow glow, despite the curtains being pulled tight. James's scent enveloped her, though it took her a moment to register it.

They were on his pillow, and his body was form-fitted against the back of hers. His arm, which was bent at the elbow beneath her neck, was across her collarbones and clutching her shoulder. His other arm, which he'd used to turn off the alarm, was wrapped around her waist and tugging her back into him as he readjusted.

If he was embarrassed by the hard-on pressed against her ass, he didn't show it this morning. Perhaps now that she'd reassured him the previous day, he'd since decided not to care anymore. It was thrilling to feel it; every inch of him grinding against her as he shifted.

She heard James inhale deeply, and she knew his face was pressed against the back of her neck. He snuggled down deeper, tightening his hold on her, like she was simply a stuffed animal meant to keep him safe from nightmares. It was sensual, but not overtly sexual, the way he held her. And as much as she'd do almost anything to lie here all day with him, it had been several minutes since the alarm had gone off.

"James?" Juliet whispered, and rubbed his arm encouragingly.

"Mmm?" he grunted back, the vibration of which she could feel in her back.

"We have to get ready for work."

James sighed, his hot breath on the top of her spine. She felt radiating tingles echo out from where his mouth was. "We gotta?" he mumbled, and Juliet almost responded with a firm 'No.' But they did.

"I'm afraid so," she sighed back in return, and worked on extricating herself from his grasp. She felt like she'd slept for days. Her muscles ached in the best way, from hardly moving throughout the night. Her body felt heavy and warm and content. Even just the last few minutes of cuddling had energized her, making her feel ready for the day.

As if on cue, the alarm started buzzing again. Their 'snooze' was up.

Juliet stretched while James turned it off. She was wearing a longer tank-top this time, uninterested in the curiosity James had given her the morning before about her brand. It wasn't something she was willing to share yet.

But she saw him staring anyway, at the space it occupied on her skin. Like he could see it beneath her shirt, as he laid on the bed, one arm propping his head up.

She flashed him an apologetic smile over her shoulder, which he met with a sad smile of his own. Something was there, in his expression; something Juliet couldn't quite identify. His eyebrows were pursed, mouth turned down into a frown. But his eyes were dark, a little hungry. He looked intently at her, as if trying to read her mind or make her catch fire from thought alone. It was odd. She wasn't sure if she'd ever seen him look at her that way before.

She thought about that expression all throughout her workday, wondering just what in the hell he'd been trying to convey to her. (And if she'd ever find out.)