Chapter 6.
-Is it confirmed? –he asked, paling when hearing her news.
-I was never mistaken before. –she said.
-Two moons? –Tywin looked completely lost, still holding a quill and staring at his wife standing on the other side of the desk.
He couldn't see any sign of a child on her, and she had been naked on his presence not that long ago, and it was not possible to tell.
-It wouldn't be. –she chuckled- Is too soon.
-But you are sure? –he insisted.
-Yes.
His gaze was lost across the office, and his expression was an enigma for her. Many times he mentioned children –plural- and an heir. He was very intent on trying for one, so what reaction –or rather lack thereof- was that? Catelyn hadn't expected to be met with anything other than joy with the news, but at this time she reminded herself that she could pretend as hard as she wished, but that was not Ned.
"I want you." –she thought, walking out of his office and ignoring the call of her name, placing her hand at the imperceptible bump- "I am very pleased that you are already here."
-Catelyn! –he rushed out of his office and followed her, standing on her way and stopping her from continuing. She was hurt, he saw. He already knew his wife well enough to know that she was disappointed in him- There's no good way to set a nursery on my apartments, and I believe you enjoy it better than the Palace.
-What?
-We shouldn't be away from him. I know that there's always the rooms on the hallway, and I don't even know what are they being used as currently, but wouldn't that be too far? The closest one to the antechamber doesn't even have a window, just a skylight.
She stared at him silently, but she was no longer displeased, just confused.
-And I could move with you to the Palace, but I sleep so much better at the apartment, and I think you do too. Is just a hard place to configure if changes are needed, as it is an ancient gold mine, and the rooms are carved onto the mountain.
-I do not think any of that is relevant now. I can barely believe that your first thought when told about…
Tywin silenced her with a kiss, feeling painfully conflicted about the pregnancy. The meister had warned him that it was very risky business for a woman her age to fall pregnant, even if she wanted a baby and he needed an heir. And now, the child was already there, a reality, and from all the reasons which he could have chosen to express his feelings, he could only think that now that the palace was getting ready, she would return to her domains as it would be logical, and he wasn't happy about it.
If he could, somehow, accommodate the baby near them, she could chose to stay, and attend to the palace with her obligations as he did. He had grown accustomed to her, and it was hard to accept that the baby could take her away from him.
As she hugged him after their kiss, Catelyn was already clear that none of his diffidence was in relation to where she would sleep at night, but about something Lady Genna had mentioned a couple weeks earlier. Childbearing had her brother traumatised, and Joanna was the cause for it. They never spoke of her, and it was for the best to keep their late spouses safe on their hearts, but her story was widely known. Now, Tywin was faced with the fact that last time a child of his was born, he lost a wife.
It was logic that Ned would be overcome with joy when learning they expected another baby, because he had only known the good side of it, the strong newborn and the healthy wife.
-Would you like for me to remain on the chambers next to yours? –she asked.
-I'd like that, but isn't the most convenient with a child.
-Well, we do have the space. –she said- None of us have to go anywhere. I am not planning on going anywhere, Tywin.
-Good. –he whispered, when he realised that she was reassuring him of his unspoken fears.
As Lady Lannister, she walked as royalty among the rest of the western nobility. Carrying his child, she walked godlike, and he suspected that she enjoyed it. The Septon was made to come to Casterly Rock and hold prayer every other day, as she refused to ride and wouldn't risk going to Lannisport, especially after her shape turned ever rounder. The changes in the court were many and constant, as she couldn't fake interest on keeping it up once she was set with fatigue. She displeased some powerful noblemen a handful of times, by not bending to their requests and daring to be a woman.
But no one would defy her. Truthfully, her behaviour didn't change, but people's perspective did, and Tywin supported her. If he wouldn't dare upsetting his expecting wife, doomed would be the one who crossed her. Her dealings with his nobility were always something to behold. The way she dealt with the Westerlings still being something that extracted a chuckle out of him now and again.
He was always very entertained by her ways, now even making little bets on his mind to try and decipher how she would react to different things, and the way she responded to find Jeyne Westerling and her father sat at her solar in the Palace was something else. She hadn't been surprised, in fact, she was the one who invited them there, but still seemed mildly annoyed by their presence, like they were pesky intrusions.
-Leave your door open, please. –she asked Tywin, who had been busy on his incumbencies, whilst she knitted something for the baby on a chase near him after being informed by her maid- I do need to tend to this alone, but I'd like you to be near.
-Sure. –he answered, and cracked only slightly the swivel stained glass window that opened to the solar.
-Lady Stark! –Jeyne Westerling said, looking nervous and standing up with her father. Catelyn didn't correct her, but also didn't say anything.
She walked into the room, beautifully dressed in dark green silk -she only just had started showing her pregnancy- and stood in front of them, he couldn't see her expressions but he already knew her enough that she wouldn't show any emotion on her face. Father and daughter looked uneasy, Jeyne trying to reintroduce his father to her. The man extended her a hand, as if asking for hers to kiss it, but Catelyn very rarely touched anyone. She took a seat, with her back turned to the windows.
-You will stand. –was the only thing she said for a while, stopping the pair from retaking their places on her couch, as they looked at each other in confusion- Lady Jeyne, I summoned you here with the intention of clearing up some misunderstandings.
-Yes.
-I was told in a letter from my daughter, the Lady Sansa Stark, of your recent attempts on establishing closer contact and your proclaimed wishes of joining her in the North.
-Yes, my lady. –Jeyne confirmed, a small curtsy and a nervous smile- After spending some time with my family, I decided that it would be for the best if I could do what Robb wished.
Tywin understood it all, even if the words were not being said. He smiled, as Catelyn would not fall for such things. Tywin knew that Jeyne's mother had means and ambition, and that her father shared the ambition but lacked the means. After the marriage to a traitor, Jeyne was not a suitable wife for anyone of consequence in the West, much less in the North, and her family had little to no connexions outside of their immediate vicinity. Jeyne was now trying to reclaim her doomed legacy as Lady Stark, or even as the northern queen. She showed her interest on joining Sansa, but she would quite possibly try and challenge the status. Very audacious for a childless widow that never crossed the Trident northwards.
-I will say this once, and you will listen to my words and swallow them. –oh, that was good entertainment!- There's only one Lady Stark, and that is Sansa. You are nothing more than a mistake.
-How dare you?! –Gawan Westerling gasped offended.
-And you will be quiet, as you are in the presence of your liege. –Catelyn barely moved her head as she spoke, silencing the man only with her eyes- I will not deal with you any longer, Lady Jeyne. I gave you an opportunity to create a life for yourself, but alas, here are you again.
-Your son loved me.
-My son is dead. And your ambition is partly responsible for it, or do you truly believe me to be innocent of your scheming? –she waited for a response from Jeyne that didn't come- You were older than him, he was bedridden and hurt, dazed with the milk of the poppy… but yet he somehow bedded you. Do I doubt he'd do it? No. Do I think you seduced my son? Yes. Maybe even told to by your overly ambitious parents? Most certainly. Or do you truly believe I haven't studied you and yours?
-I do not need to stand here and be humiliated! –the little thing decided to bite back, but her father held her arm and silenced her. He understood that this was not Catelyn Stark, but Catelyn Lannister, and they were both her subjects now.
-But, in good faith, understanding that your situation is quite inauspicious, I have found you a way. –Catelyn opened a kind smile, the one she always had when dealing with plights from the people- I found you a husband, which will fix all of your issues and teach you that the North was never meant for you.
Tywin remembered that a couple days prior she had come to him asking if he had any soldiers in need of a wife. Baseborn or not, but someone who would be able to keep a wife nicely. He relayed the question to his commander, ordering any possible candidate to seek his wife as she probably had to arrange a marriage to a maid of something of the kind. And she selected a man of two and thirty, widower, father of two, third son from a minor noble house but who owned some land and served Tywin's guard as low official.
-This is sir Hugh of House Drox. –the man who had been standing there in guard approached after the smallest nod from Catelyn's head- He will never mistreat you if you honour him as a dutiful wife. –Jeyne now cried openly, and her father seemed to be looking for a way out but failing- The dowry owed him can be paid eventually, he will grace you time.
-I'd like an audience with Lord Tywin. –Gawan Westerling declared, speaking over Catelyn as she tried to explain to a crying Jeyne what her future would look like.
-He has two children, which you are expected to raise as your own. –Catelyn continued- And who will not be abused. See, this works in your favour as we do not know if you can give him any babes, but it matters not as he already have his own.
-I won't… -Jeyne cried, face red, voice stuffed- This is not fair… You cannot make me!
-There is where you are wrong. –Catelyn crocked her head slightly- I can do to you whatever I wish. I can imprison you for laying with an enemy of House Lannister and marrying without permission. I can even surrender you to the crown, and you know the punishment for treason in the capital. I awarded you grace when I sent you home, and you forgot yourself and tried to trick your betters once again.
As the girl sobbed, Catelyn sent another of her guards to get Tywin.
-Please, go and ask my Lord Husband to join me here, if he is so kind and won't interfere on his day.
The Westerlings had gone rogue in the Rebellion, and Tywin had known that they had believed the Starks were wining that war, and that their daughter would be a queen in the North. He even knew Catelyn was right with the seduction thing, as Jeyne's mother was far too ambitious and had some unorthodox ways. So he did not care for them at all, and he truly believed that even needing to put them on their places, Catelyn was actually being kind.
His presence only enhanced the awkwardness in the room, but it was far too amusing to care for it. Tywin stood there, as father and daughter shuddered in fear. His guard, the newly declared groom, hadn't said a word so far and seemed indifferent to everything. He had been told he was going to be given a wife and that was great news for him and all that mattered.
-My Lord, this man requested an audience with you. Would you award him a minute? –Catelyn asked, Tywin now taking a seat by her side.
-Not if he will challenge your rule, my dear. –Tywin looked at the man- Are you going to challenge Lady Lannister's rule?
-No, my lord.
-Father! –Jeyne looked betrayed.
-I believe my wife to be a kind and lenient woman, and if I was the one dealing with your House's treacherous ways, it wouldn't be good for you. –he looked at Jeyne- You believe you are owed something when all you caused was trouble. –even if it had worked on his favour really quite well.
-I will not be forced to marry. –Jeyne still believed she was a queen.
-This is true. –Catelyn agreed- A couple days in a cell and you will do it by choice.
No imprisonment was needed after Jeyne was allowed time to talk with her father alone. In the end, they both ended up expressing their gratitude and inviting her new intended to the Crag, as preparations would ensue for the wedding.
-Oh, you are not leaving Casterly Rock without a husband. –Catelyn said, as the girl's hopes were shattered- The sept awaits you. I am sure your father will be pleased to send your belongings to Sir Hugh's domains.
And after all said and done, Catelyn took the groom aside and handled him a small bag of gold.
-If you mistreat her, I will have your head. And you will be patient about the consummation, she is still in disbelief of what has happened and it might be for the best to wait and be kind.
Tywin was always surprised about how a woman would try to protect another, even if they despised each other.
She was distant lately, with the approaching date where her daughter would wed the second son of House Royce -a boy of twenty named Jasper, which was a splendid match- some information started to trickle down the Eyrie and unsettle her. Lysa had married Petyr Baelish a good while back, and recently she had accidentally fallen to her death through the moondoors, right before descending to warmer climates, leaving her only son, Jon Arryn's heir, under her new husband's care. Heartbroken by her sister's demise, even with not much lost love between them, she was fairly sure that it had been no accident, but refused to speak on it.
Then quickly after such event, Lord Baelish tried to establish contact with her, offering a better suitor to her daughter, in the person of Harrold Hardyng, known as Harry the Heir, as he was intended to inherit Jon Arryn's Seat in case of his sickly son not surviving to adulthood. He was insistent whilst remaining ignored, and surely started to contact Sansa herself, as she had written to her mother looking for advice.
"You need to rush your wedding, my love." –Catelyn replied- "Petyr Baelish seeks access to you, and this troubles me greatly. He might be conspiring against your cousin, Lord Robert Arryn, and scheming his way into broader politics. Marry Lord Jasper before winter worsens even more and end this at once. Even if nothing untoward was happening, Lord Hardyng has fathered a bastard and is expecting another, so not a great match to you"
And Sansa did as she was told, avoiding hearing from her subjects the japes sometimes whispered about Robb, and the fact that he should have listened to his mother. The marriage was brought forward, meaning that Tywin's promise to take her to the wedding would not be kept, as she wouldn't travel half way through a pregnancy.
She hadn't really expected to make to Winterfell at all, as the winter was raging wildly, announcing itself as a long one. Even despite their multiple attempts, or so Tywin had claimed, it hadn't been possible to remove Rickon from the Island where he was being kept by those near wildling folk. The ocean was too vengeful and riddled with ice to allow any crossing. Thankfully, Tywin managed to get them provisions and people that would allow them to survive comfortably, but Catelyn's heart was still broken knowing that her son was trapped far away from home, under the protection of someone who probably didn't truly had his best interests at heart.
Something needed to be done about it, and she had an idea what, even if her pride would end up bruised.
As the pregnancy progressed, Catelyn grew more isolated, sometimes remarking on how tired she felt and that she didn't have energy for anything. Tywin only wanted for her to be comfortable, so Catelyn was mostly by herself, as she didn't have the disposition to act the part for anyone in court.
She prepared a nursery on the rock facing rooms at the hallway, just across the antechambers from her. The skylight and a small system of mirrors secured proper illumination to the place. She chose that specific room due to a fireplace, as people had warned her that this area could be quite cold on winters. The room was also easily accessible to servants and had access to an adjoining chamber that could house a wet nurse or some other arrangements.
It was now not very usual for them to sleep in the same bed, or to share any marital intimacy, but sometimes Catelyn looked for some comfort on him, who was now very openly enchanted with his lady, and some people had started to say that she had made him hers. He agreed. It was obvious and useless to deny. She was the light on his eyes, Genna said, and she was right. It was clear to Catelyn as well, and even if he never fully said what he felt, she knew that her presence filled him with warmth and that their interactions would make or break his day.
-Would you walk with me? –she asked, on one of her visits to his office, interrupting his work and demanding some attention, which he was always happy to give.
-The Meister has said that you should start resting more now, as baby is near. –he retorted, attending her anyway.
She hadn't left the apartments for days, and was usually found either on in a tub of warm water or lounging under the sun on a chase placed in front of the tall west facing windows of their solar. She looked gorgeous, even with the hair tied in a simple braid and dressed only on sleeping shifts and a heavy robe that barely covered her full stomach. They paced slowly around the garden, with her clinging onto his arm.
-Just hold me for a second… -she urged him, as he took her into a protective hug.
-Are you well? –he asked, worried, as she contained a cry and her body tensed- Catelyn?
-You were right. –she said, still shaking slightly holding on to him- Baby is near.
-You should be inside, you should be resting…
-Oh, my dear… -she sighted with a soft smile- This is my sixth child, I know what I am doing.
-We should go for the meister…
-Tywin… -she looked tired- I will send for him when I am ready.
-Shouldn't you have maids and midwifes and… people?
-Was it a mistake to seek support in you? –she asked- Because at this point, I really only need you.
He looked at her, startled, as she said without any words that he was trusted and appreciated. Truth was that she only really had him.
-The help will be warned when we overcome this part of labour, and they will be here when I start to require some help, is that a good answer for you?
-What can I do to assist you?
-Help me keep the time. It is important to see the progress. –she smiled at his promptitude- I suspect that the pains are over half an hour apart or so. We still have some lengths to go until baby is here.
They kept walking and stopping when the pain would come, and Tywin would hold and rub his wife's back, rocking her lightly trying to soothe her discomfort. Catelyn found herself cuddled on his chest for longer periods of time, and when a passing rain cloud banished them back into the solar, she decided that it wouldn't be out of question now to warn her maids about the baby and have a bath drawn. On the tub, trying to relax and rest, ridding the pain wasn't as bad. She could feel as the baby made his way down her hips with each new contraction.
When she left the tub, she saw as her chambers were being turned around with the preparations for the childbed, which was good, but she wasn't that near yet. The meister insisted to examine her, which was usually a painful matter that would tell her what she already knew. She denied, asking to be left alone, despising any contact with any of them and especially the meister, his biggest crime being that he was not Meister Luwin. But finally, for everyone's sake, especially Tywin's state of mind, she allowed.
-You are half way, my lady. –the meister said, cleaning his hands.
-I am closer than that. –she mumbled, remembering that after reaching that point, her babies would be there in no more than a couple hours.
-Since when are you labouring, my lady? –the meister inquired.
-The morning.
-Why weren't I informed?
-Did you ever birth a child, meister? –she asked, sitting up- I did not need you until now. And you said yourself, all is well based on your assertion, now I would like some privacy with my husband.
-My lady, is most uncommon to have Lord Tywin on your confinement. –a midwife said.
-Fine. –Catelyn agreed, dreading the loneliness but uncompromising with her peace- But this doesn't mean you are to stay. If the room is ready, I'd like to be alone, please. –and as they started to argue, her patience snapped- I'd like to be alone!
Her shout echoed around the chamber, and very quickly Tywin was there, staring at his distressed wife, now riding another bout of pain only with the comfort of a strangled pillow. They looked at him as if begging for some reason, but he had decided to trust that his lady knew what she was doing. As she accurately had stated, that was her sixth child.
-You will be asked to return when I need you. –Catelyn said, almost apologetically, catching her breath- I just need my husband now, please.
-You heard your lady. -he quickly placed himself next to her sat at the edge of the bed, and hugged her, doing the rocking motion that seemed to sooth her better- Is all right, my darling.
-Just stay with me… -she begged, lifting her face to stare at him.
-I am not going anywhere. –he assured her, holding her face and kissing her lips- If me being here is what sooths you, I won't leave your side.
What she really needed was for him to feel involved. But wouldn't deny she found solace on his presence.
It took a while, but she finally allowed the meister and midwives to return, as she was now sure that the baby was almost there, with some faint need for pushing starting to be felt. Whilst helping her through the pain previously, she had asked if her husband wished to remain for the birth and he didn't know what to say.
Men were always told that childbed was the women's war and that they did them no good on interfering. But his lady was different, as she had allowed him the privilege to remain by her side as she was prepared in such agony for the birth of their child. He concluded that even with her having built a life for herself in Casterly Rock, she was still most reliant on him for comfort, and that was the priority at that moment.
She was blinded by pain once more, and the urge to push felt a bit stronger. Tywin's decision was made for him, as he realised that he would not be able to walk away from her as she endured such distress, impressed by the lack of screaming.
-You are so brave… -he said, drying sweat from her forehead, as she fought to catch her breath, the contractions were so near now that every moment counted.
-Baby will be born in the next one. –she panted, not appearing that she looked forward for what was to come- I need you to hold my leg, can you do that?
And that way, when the next contraction came, she pushed with all her might, screaming through her teeth with the searing pain, bending forwards onto Tywin and delivering a howling cub. Tywin looked at his child, as Catelyn collapsed onto the pillows fighting for breath.
-Look at him, my love… -Tywin was amazed, as instinctively Catelyn started to dry the baby with her shifts, placed at her chest, hands shaking, choked up with tears- He is… -but no adjectives sufficed to describe his heir.
The midwife placed a blanket over the child, as his mother bundled him nicely, still looking absolutely exhausted. He cried very loudly, and it was a powerful song.
-He's here. –she finally whispered, happy, looking up at her husband- And he is perfect.
-Yes. –Tywin breath out, establishing that the baby had her eyes.
She cuddled on his chest trying to get the baby to nurse, as the meister and midwife finished caring for the afterbirth and her bruised womanhood.
-There was no tearing, my lady. –the meister said- You shouldn't be too uncomfortable now.
-Thank you. –she smiled, relaxed and mellow, as if she had being turned into a new person- And I apologise if I made things difficult earlier.
Cleaned, changed, placed in fresh bedsheets and convinced to eat some supper, Catelyn now looked content, with their sleeping prince nested on a bassinet near her. What a day! –she thought- And what a partner… She was aware of his temper and cruelty, but for a little while none of it mattered as he held her through pain, kissing her face, promising that all would always be well, and making her feel as the most important person in the whole of creation. She saw the shine on his eye when receiving their son on his arms, and the pride on his voice when naming him Tyler. And she remembers hearing, on the moment their son was born, his declaration of love.
-Where do you want me? –he asked, dressed on his sleeping garments as the night drew to a close- I do not mind if Tyler wakes us overnight.
-Is sweet that you think I'd have any other answer other than "here". –she smiled, receiving him on the bed, and leaning her pained body against his- And we do not need to worry about Tyler, as we need our rest and he was not displeased by his wet nurse. She has more milk to offer than me at the moment.
-Do you intend on having him on your breast? –he was surprised, as most highborn ladies wouldn't do it.
-As I did with all my babies. –she smiled- Is such a precious thing, I wouldn't give it for the world. I already feel guilty for leaving him for the night, but I am just so tired…
-You were wonderful today. And you made me very proud.
-Oh… -she sighted- I am so grateful for your unwavering support and love throughout the whole ordeal. I could have done it without you, but I wouldn't want to.
"You were all I had." –she thought, thinking of old nan and her ladies being her welcome support in past experiences.
-How could I not love you? –he hugged her softly.
Catelyn felt some guilt, maybe due to her whirlwind of emotions after birthing a child, for not corresponding his feelings in the slightest. But how could she? She appreciated him, and she could recognise how big of an effort he was willing to put onto her wellbeing, but love? Only if the gods took away all of her memories and healed all of her pain.
He looked at her as if she was the moon and the starts and all the beautiful things. When she was with him, she felt safe and cared for. When they would exchange some affection, she felt warmth. It did not hurt that he was as handsome as he could be, and that he charmed her very easily with some cheeky compliments or small romantic gestures. But love? No.
She would always remember.
-Do you remember when people used to say that I had been lost to the Stranger? –she asked, making the effort of rising onto his chest to look in his eyes, even with her aches- I do understand how people thought that, and I did had my reasons to let go of my mind… If I was lost, you found me, Tywin. Because that is what I feel with you. That I found a place for myself.
He took her lips ever so carefully, as he now didn't kiss only the most impressive woman he had ever met, or the one named as his wife. Now, in his arms, he had the mother of his son, the companion on that journey, the breath on his lungs. He had been alone for so long that he truly believed that destiny had prepared them to each other, with all the pain and sacrifices. And if it depended solely on him, his lady would never feel hurt anymore.