Happy New Year minna-san!

I hope that you had a good start!

So, let me start this year with a update for this story!

"What are you gonna do on Christmas?"

They were having dinner at Katsuki's apartment like always. He wasn't really hurt, nothing happened during his patrol that day, but Deku would visit anyway, and he wouldn't be the one telling her to stop coming.

"At Christmas…?" Deku hummed, a pensive expression on her face. "Probably working. Why?"

Okay, so maybe Katsuki hasn't thought it through. They knew each other for months, it was obvious that they care for each other, being together was fun and Deku was always challenging him. They were compatible. And maybe he wanted something more for their relationship.

The problem was, how to do it?

"Just wondering if you wanted to maybe…" Fuck! Why was it so difficult to say those words?! "...celebrate it…together…"

He expected Deku to reply immediately, gushing about cakes and Christmas ornaments, and what kind of present he would give her, Katsuki didn't expect her to stare at him, with…he didn't know what were those feelings passing through green eyes.

"You mean like…a date…?" She asked.

And some kind of alarm was triggered in his head with that short sentence.

Something is wrong. There was something wrong with the way she said it. Did he get it wrong? Did Katsuki read the signs in the wrong way? He thought that Deku was…interested in him…but her reaction…

Katsuki didn't have another option but to back off.

"What the fuck Deku?!" He forced himself to say, and the woman flinched. "The fuck do you mean by date?! Pinky is throwing a christmas party and asked you to come too!" He wasn't lying, Mina was planning a party, but Katsuki kind of wanted to be alone with Deku on the holiday.

So, it hurted see her sigh in relief.

"Ah! Is that so?" Deku said, a small smile on her lips. "I will see with the hospital about my shift and I will let you know!"

He nodded and took another spoon of his spicy curry, not trusting his voice.

…

"Are you dating Midoriya?"

Months ago, when Kirishima asked that same question, Katsuki got angry, yelled and denied everything. But that was months ago, when he was just a patient of Midoriya Izuku. Now, what were they? A doctor and her patient? Friends? Something more? Really, Katsuki didn't know what kind of label he should put on his relationship with Deku, but considering her reaction to the mere thought of going on a date with him…

"No, we are not dating." Katsuki grumbled, irritated that he couldn't give a straight answer for that question. "Now fuck off, Shitty Hair!"

"But seriously dude!" The red haired man insisted, sitting on the chair in front of Katsuki work table. "It's been months! Everyone with a pair of eyes can see that you two are dancing around each other!"

"I said FUCK OFF!" Katsuki hissed, red eyes glaring at his best friend. "This has nothing to do with you!"

"Did you at least invite her on a date?" Kirishima continued, ignoring the blond's murderous glare. "Not the mini dates in your apartment, but a real date, like dinner at a fancy restaurant?"

"Oi Shitty Hair! I will kill you if you say another word about it!"

"Oh! Shit! You didn't!" Red Riot exclaimed, eyes widened in surprise. "Why Bakubro?!"

Katsuki knew that he had anger issues, that's why he went to therapy for years, and that's why twice a month he still went there, just to make sure that he was still good and making progress. His therapist teached him breathing exercises to keep his cool, and they usually work, but fucking Kirishima Eijirou was testing him right now, and Katsuki thought for a second that he spent money in therapy for nothing since he wanted to explode the red haired idiot.

"Listen here Hair for Brains!" Katsuki said, counting until ten on his head. "Deku is my doctor, and we are friends. That's all, got it?!"

"Come on Bakugou! Don't be like that!"

"Like what?!"

"Like that! A loser!"

"Who are you calling 'loser', dipshit?!"

"You!" Kirishima exclaimed, any kind of self preservation instinct forgotten. "You like Midoriya, don't you?! So just ask her out!"

"Fuck you asshole!" The other hero snarled, getting up from the chair and slamming his explosive hands on the table. "I would ask her out if she was interested!"

"..."

"..."

"...Bakugou…"

"WHAT?!"

"You think that she is not interested in you?"

"She isn't!"

"I can't believe you!" Kirishima facepalmed. "Which girl keeps going to check on your health if she is not interested in something more than friendship?! Are you this stupid?!"

"Shut up! You don't know what you are talking about!" Katsuki defended himself, angry red eyes glaring at his friend, who arched a brow at him.

"So what is going on?" Kirishima asked.

The ash blond man sighed tired, and let his body fall on the chair again.

"There is nothing going on."

"Really? Again with…"

"Shut the fuck up for a second and listen Shitty Hair!" Katsuki roared, but there was not a bite to it. "It's not like I didn't want to ask her out. I am not stupid, I know that what we have been doing is not exactly just friendship, but I feel like…if I try to get closer, Deku…she is going to pull away."

"What?" Kirishima sounded surprised. "Are we talking about the same person here? The spontaneous and tough woman, the only one who isn't afraid of sass Bakugou Katsuki?"

The blond huffed at that.

"Yesterday, I tried to ask her out on a date." Katsuki finally admitted with a sigh. "But…I don't think that she liked the idea of going on a date with me."

"No way! That can't be!" The red haired frowned. "After all this time, why…"

"Just fucking drop it, Kirishima." Katsuki said. "Deku is not interested."

And Kirishima fell silent, because Bakugou just used his real name instead of the nickname.

…

"Are you dating Bakugou?"

The question came out of nowhere, and Izuku choked at her cappuccino. The bakery where they decided to meet to hang out was pretty famous, their cakes were cute and delicious, also, the pâtisserie, a hero that retired a few years ago, had such a charisma that people would come back frequently to eat and sometimes talk with the ex hero.

Shouto offered her a napkin, and Izuku accepted it, whipping her mouth with it. That day in particular, the shop was bustling with clients putting orders of cakes and other desserts for the holiday that was approaching, and suddenly Izuku felt self conscious, feeling as if someone would eavesdrop on them.

"W-where did this come from, Shouchan?" She asked stuttering, green eyes wide and freckled cheeks slightly pink. "Why would you think this in the first place?"

"Are you seriously asking that, Midoriya?" The pro hero arched an elegant eyebrow at his friend. "I'm supposed to be the dense one here, but as you can see, the way that you and Bakugou have been acting made even me notice that something is going on."

"There is nothing going on, Shouchan!" The doctor answered, cheeks getting redder and redder. "We are just friends!"

"No. Me and you, yeah, we are just friends, but you and Bakugou?" The man insisted, taking a sip of his tea before continuing. "It's different."

"How is it different?!" The woman insisted. "I go to your house too, I take care of your wounds and we chat!"

"Yeah, but I have known you for more than a decade." Shouto stated, face as stoic as always. "And anyone who knows Bakugou can see that he has been in good spirits for a while."

"He being loud and spurting curses that would make a sailor embarrassed, is your definition of good spirits?" It was her turn to arch an eyebrow.

"No, that's just Bakugou being Bakugou." The half red and half white haired man answered. "What I mean is that he doesn't really make interns cry anymore with just a look, and sometimes he pays for the first round of drinks, or that's what Ashido told me the other day. But anyway, he's doing stuff that he only does when he is in a good mood, and strangely it started happening after you two started hanging out frequently."

"That just means that maybe I am a good influence." Izuku commented, trying to sound proud.

"I don't know why you are trying so hard to deny your relationship with Bakugou."

"I'm not denying anything." She frowned, green eyes staring at her chocolate cake. "I can't deny something that's not true in the first place."

This time Shouto placed his cup on the table, mismatched eyes studying his friend. He knew Midoriya for a long time, she was kind and would do anything to help people, she would also intrude on people's lives to bring the best out of them, he was proof of that. But when it came to herself…

"Midoriya." Shouto called, voice gentle and soft. "You choose to be a doctor to save people, because you wanted to help in your own way, and prove to everyone that they were wrong about you."

She looked up, the embarrassment from before forgotten.

"And you did it." The hero continued. "But you know, sometimes we also need someone to help us. When I look at you, I think that you are trying to keep people at an arm's length. You put a wall between you and other people when you think that they are coming too close to whatever you are scared of."

"..."

"And right now, you are creating a wall between you and Bakugou. Why?"

Shouto didn't like pressing his friend like that, but how many times did he see Izuku doing that? Keeping people that wanted to bring a smile to her face away? As her best friend, it was his role to tell her off.

"Shouchan…" His name was barely a whisper among the shop's noise, but he heard it clearly. "...is it wrong to be scared?"

"No, it's not. But if someone wants to be there for you, why would you keep them away?"

"Not everyone is understanding…"

"You didn't tell him yet?" She shook her head, not meeting his eyes. Shouto sighed. "We are not at school anymore, Midoriya."

"Yes, we are not." The woman agreed. "But people are as cruel as before."

"So you think that Bakugou is one of them?" Shouto deadpanned.

"What?!" The woman cried, green eyes looking at her friend as if he said something stupid. "Why would I think that?!"

"I don't know. But the way you act makes me think that you do."

"Kacchan is not like that! He…" And she stopped. Green eyes widening in realization. "...he is not like that…" What was she afraid of again?

Shouto placed his hand over Izuku's, making her look at warm mismatched eyes.

"Bakugou is a lot of things, but he isn't like that, Midoriya." He stated. "And I know that you wouldn't let someone approach you if they wanted to hurt you."

"Shouchan…" The woman chuckled, but it was obvious that she was trying hard to not cry. "Last night…I think…No, I know that Kacchan was trying to ask me out…but I…" When her friend didn't say a word, she continued. "All this time I was unconsciously trying to break free of these chains, and somewhere in my heart I thought that Kacchan would be the one who would help me, but…in the end I got scared and…"

"So what? You fuck it up." Shouto blurted out. It was unusual to hear Todoroki Shouto curse, but he was trying to make a point, so he needed stronger words. "You tried to run away, but you can't…no, you don't want to do it anymore. And you know why."

And Shouto was right.

From the very beginning Izuku knew that the way that she had been acting since her first meeting with Bakugou Katsuki was different. She learned to be sassy as a mechanism to deal with people looking down on her, but while interacting with Katsuki, she was just doing it for fun, because it was always interesting talking with the man.

And as a result she let her guard down, and Katsuki made into her heart without her noticing.

Izuku couldn't run away anymore because she fell in love with Bakugou Katsuki.

…

A week later, when a soft knock echoed on his apartment, Katsuki didn't know what exactly he should do.

"It's open!" He yelled from the kitchen, red eyes staring at the contents of the pan. He needed every fucking second to get his shit together, before he could look Deku in the eyes.

Call him petty, but he was kind of hurt by Deku's subtle rejection, but his stupid heart still wanted her presence near him.

"Woah! Something smells good!" He heard the woman say from the door. "What are you cooking, Kacchan?"

The door closed, and Katsuki took a deep breath. He could do this.

"Beef stew." He replied.

"Meat!" He heard her giggled, and the footsteps were approaching. "That's a pro hero for you, they can afford meat everyday!"

"The fuck, Deku?!" He turned around, and immediately he found himself staring at bright green eyes. "You are a doctor! You get paid fucking well too!"

"Well, yes, but cooking is not exactly my specialty, so it doesn't matter how much meat I have if I can't make it tasty and edible. But I can bake pretty well!"

Katsuki rolled his eyes, and turned back to take a look at the stew, it was boiling.

"Dinner is ready." He said, looking at Deku by the corner of his eyes. "Be useful and get the plates out!"

It was the doctor's turn to roll her eyes, but she still did what she was asked.

"What the hell was that face for?!" The blonde hissed, trying to sound annoyed. "I cooked dinner! You can't fucking complain!"

"And when did I complain, Kacchan?"

Fucking sassy woman! Why was he mopping for her again? Damn you, stupid heart!

Seeing Deku walking around his kitchen knowing where everything was located was…doing his stupid heart to flip inside his chest. It was nice, even homy, and Katsuki really wanted things to continue that way but with a slight addition of touches…

However, everytime that his mind went back to their last dinner, he tried to convince himself that it wasn't possible. He and Deku were friends. Nothing else would come of their relationship.

"Kacchan…?"

He looked up, Deku was staring at him, trying to figure out what he was thinking.

"Just sit down and eat, nerd!" He said, getting their bowls and filling it with rice, but she didn't sit. "What?!"

"...Kacchan…" The doctor started, her hands gripping the back support of the chair. "I…we need to talk."

Katsuki flinched. We need to talk. Famous phrase for couples break up, though they weren't dating. So what? Deku wanted to end what? They friendship? She wouldn't come to his apartment ever again? She would give up being his doctor? Fucking hell, what the hell was he thinking?!

"About what?" He asked a moment later, placing a bowl of rice in front of the greenette.

She didn't say a word for a few seconds, and the pro hero could see the gears turning on the doctor's mind. What was so important that, Deku of all people, were second guessing her own thoughts?

"Just fuck say it, Deku!"

She groaned and finally sat on the chair.

"Ugh! It's not this simple, Kacchan!"

"It is! Just say whatever comes to your mind, and that's it! What is so damn difficult about it?!"

"Kacchan, not everyone is capable of being so straightforward like you, you know?" But Katsuki just scoffed at that and took a bite of the stew. "And what I want to tell you is…a little bit difficult for me."

And that made Katsuki look at the woman.

Deku was always smiling and laughing, of course she was capable of getting annoyed and angry - how many times was he at the end of her anger? -, but he never saw her looking…distressed, at least not like that. Sometimes when she comes to his apartment she is sad, eyes a little bit puffy from crying. She was a doctor, not god or whatever celestial being. She can't save every single person that goes to the hospital, just like a pro hero can't save all citizens from villain's attacks.

It's difficult, they try their best, but that's a reality that they need to deal with in their line of work.

However even on her worst days of work, she didn't look like that, looking like she would flee if he said a word louder than a whisper.

"What the f-...what is going on, Deku?" He managed to say without a cursing word, because Deku didn't need something that would stress her more. "What happened?"

"Have you…have you ever wondered what kind of quirk I have?" Deku asked out of blue.

"...I did." In the start Katsuki wondered what kind of quirk the doctor had, but she never used it while he was in the hospital nor when they were at his apartment, so he just thought that whatever kind of quirk she had, wasn't something that could be actually used for her job. But it was just a detail, he didn't really care about it, Deku's personality was way more interesting than any quirk that he saw until this day.

"But you never asked me about it."

"Is that important?"

"In a society where more than 80% of people have a quirk, I thought that you would be curious."

"I was at the start." Katsuki sighed and crossed his arm, back resting comfortably at the chair. "But you never used it, or at least I didn't notice you using it. So I just brushed it off, not everyone wants to talk about their quirks."

She didn't say anything for a while, and Katsuki didn't hurry her either. Their food was getting cold, but fuck that, microwaves were there for that.

"Do you remember when I told you about this nickname…'Deku'?"

"Yes, someone misread the kanji of your name, and was an ass about it."

"The thing is…the first time that someone called me 'Deku' was at kindergarten, when I was 4 and…didn't get a quirk."

What?

"W-what?!" Katsuki wanted to punch himself for stuttering, it was really out of character, but he was surprised by that. He heard about people hating their own quirks, or the appearance that their quirk gave them, but he never met someone… "Are you quirkless?"

Deku nodded, her eyes downcast and hands closed in fists around the hem of her shirt. She didn't want to look at Katsuki now, or she may lose all her courage to talk about the topic.

"N-nowadays…" Her voice cracked, but she didn't stop. "...is more difficult to find quirkless people, in our generation it was already uncommon, but there were some registered cases…mine included."

"How…did you find out about it?" Katsuki asked, the caution in his voice was evident.

"When the children around me started manifesting their quirks, my mother took me to the hospital, the doctor asked for a few tests, and by the end of the day, he found out that I had an extra joint on my feet, an evidence that I would never get a quirk." Deku answered, still not looking at him. "Kids can be cruel when you are different. They decided that 'Deku' was a better name for someone without a quirk, someone that they judged useless for society."

And oh shit! All this time Katsuki have being calling her by that fuck up nickname when the real meaning behind it was way havier than he was originally told.

"And no matter where I went, the name and the stigma of being quirkless would follow."

"D-" But the hero stopped, because what was he supposed to call the doctor now?

"I wanted to be a hero when I was a kid." Izuku continued, a humorless laugh escaping her lips. "Of course I wanted to be a hero, how could I not? We grew up in a society where we are surrounded by heroes that we idolize. But people kept telling me that it was impossible for someone quirkless, my mother would cry and say sorry when it wasn't her fault, and one day a hero, the hero that I looked up to the most, told me that a quirkless girl couldn't be a hero, at least not the type of hero who can fight villains, so he just said that I should find another path."

Children are cruel, but adults could be crueler, crushing dreams without a second thought. If he was beside Deku as a kid, would he have been different from those people? He was so self centered as a kid, his quirk was everything for him back then, he started to be a better person when he entered U.A. and was forced to acknowledge his strengths and weaknesses. Katsuki gritted his teeth, because he hated to think that he would probably be a bully if he had met Izuku as a kid.

"I think that's probably why I started taking notes on other people's quirks, it was kind of a way to still be included in the quirk's world, I guess." The woman commented, oblivious of Katsuki's dilemma. "Well, but children…they didn't want to have nothing to do with me, being quirkless was more like a contagious disease than a condition for them. Shouchan, he was the only one who didn't care about it."

"Todoroki?"

She nodded.

"Actually, Shouchan didn't care about anything back then…he had a stick up his ass, and I had to punch him to get my point across." Izuku huffed at the memory. "He had everything that I wanted but he wasn't happy, I was really pissed off."

"I bet that he deserved it."

"Probably." Izuku agreed "But he had his reasons too. In the end we became friends, the first friend for one another. The boy who had everything and the girl who had nothing, that's what some people used to say."

"That's…"

"Wrong? Yeah, it is, but no one really knew what was going on in our lives. But becoming friends with Shouchan was probably the best thing that happened to me."

Katsuki didn't say anything, but he couldn't stop the frown on his face. Was he jealous of Half and Half bastard? Yes. Would he admit it? Never.

"He was the first person that I told about the whole quirkless stuff. And do you want to know what he told me?" She said, but it was a rhetorical question. "He said that I could be a hero, that I would find a way to be one, and prove to everyone and myself that being quirkless wasn't a disadvantage or whatever."

And Izuku finally looked up to stare at his red eyes. Her green eyes were glassy, she was barely holding back tears, her shoulders were trembling, and Katsuki really wanted to hold her, but no, she was still telling him about a matter really important for her. Who was he to stop her now?

"And I found a way! I don't have a quirk like Recovery Girl, but being a doctor was a way to save people because it didn't depend just on quirks, but also abilities. So it was the way that I found to help people and the heroes that I have always admired."

"But?" Katsuki asked, because he was sure that there was something else.

She laughed, a dry and humorless laugh again. It didn't match Midoriya Izuku at all.

"But the thing is, I reached where I wanted to be, however from time to time, some people make me remember that my condition is still not well accepted in this world."

I was having a bad day. She said once, when they met at the supermarket for the first time. After hearing this story, the ash blond man wondered if that bad day had anything to do with stupid people and their fucking prejudice.

"That's why I unconsciously keep people at an arm's length." Sad green eyes were staring at him, and Katsuki felt like she was trying to apologize for something. "Besides Shouchan, I never let people inside my heart because I was scared that once they found out that I am quirkless they would leave me behind. My friendships and past boyfriends, all my relationships, platonic or not, were shallow, that's why they never last long, just because I didn't want to get hurt!"

"...and what's wrong with that?" Katsuki muttered, a scowl on his face. He was angry, not at Deku, but at the whole situation. "You are allowed to be scared! Fuck! I would be scared in your position! No one wants to get hurt!"

"I know, I know that!" Deku almost choked on her words, but she still didn't look away from Katsuki's red eyes. "Every single time that someone was coming closer to really get to know me, I ran away because I was scared, I couldn't believe in myself and in other people…"

Katsuki felt a lump on his throat, that conversation…he wasn't good at that kind of topic, he lost count of how many times he felt his anger skyrocket over the stories of dipshits being dipshits, and how his heart sank at seeing sad green eyes. But the way that the doctor was looking at him now, it felt different.

"But you know, Kacchan?" This time the greenette sounded confident even if a few tears were falling from green eyes. "I am done with running away!"

"What changed?" He asked, overcoming the weird wave of feelings.

"You changed it."

Katsuki eyes widened.

"You changed it, Kacchan." Deku smiled, a small smile playing at the corner of her lips.

What?

I reallyyyyy hope that I started the year with a good chapter!^^

This chapter was a little bit difficult to write, I mean, there was drama and a lot of feelings, and I don't know if the character will feel OOC for you. I tried my best, but let me know if you think they are kind of...off...^^''

But still, I hope you are all enjoying the story so far!

I will see you next week!

See you!