Venice, 1989

Ethan was frozen in fear, he couldn't speak, couldn't defend his decision.

Suddenly, a thunderous gunshot erupted from Gabriel's gun. Ethan's breath caught in his throat as the realization hit him like a freight train: He was going to die. The man he'd trusted would be the one to kill him.

But when Ethan opened his eyes, he realized that he was still alive…why? He spared a glance around the ally, searching for where the bullet hit.

"No…"

Marie. She was deathly still and limp, with a bullet hole in her chest, and blood forming a small puddle around her.

Blood, so much blood.

Ethan was horrified to find Marie's lifeless body on the ground. He ran over to her, gently touching her cheek, hoping he wasn't too late. But she was cold to the touch and didn't respond to his efforts to revive her. He felt a wave of guilt wash over him as he realized he hadn't acted sooner.

As his grief and shame overtook him, he heard Gabriel's voice behind him.

"She would have been dead anyway," he said coldly. "She knew too much."

Ethan fell to his knees, horrified at what Gabriel had done. Marie was dead, and Ethan was responsible for her death.

As he stared, Gabriel kneeled down next to him, his weapon still aimed at Ethan.

"Why didn't you finish the mission?" Gabriel repeated, his voice cold and emotionless.

"I'm sorry," Ethan whispered. "I couldn't do it. I couldn't kill her."

"Weak." The single word was delivered with disdain.

Ethan put his head in his hands wishing he could be invisible. I wish he could have just gotten the Dam job done, maybe getting it over with himself would have made it easier.

"Hey, hey." Ethan felt Gabriel's hand pulling his head back, forcing Ethan to look him dead in the eyes, "Look at me."

Gabriel's voice was cold and demanding. Ethan tried not to look at Gabriel, but his head was just pulled back to where it was, held in place by a tight grip, "Look at me, Ethan…"

Gabriel's grip on his head tightened.

"You had ONE JOB. And you couldn't even do that!"

Ethan flinched at Gabriel's anger.

"Weak. Weak. WEAK"!

Ethan began to tremble.

"Look at you! Shaking like a coward..."

Ethan reluctantly lifted his head to look at Gabriel. The coldness of his stare set Ethan's heart racing, trying desperately to escape the situation.

Ethan tried to calm himself down, to find his strength and compose himself, but he couldn't. He was too terrified, too broken.

Gabriel stared at Ethan in silence, his face contorted with hatred. Ethan tried to force himself to stop crying, but it was too late. He had failed again.

"You can't help it, can you?" Gabriel sneered. "You're weak and pathetic. Always have been."

"I'm sorry," Ethan whispered. "I failed."

"You did." Gabriel's voice remained cold as he took his hand away from Ethan. "And that failure has a price."

Ethan's eyes widened in fear as Gabriel aimed his weapon at him. "Please."

As Ethan realized the consequences of his failure, the full realization of what he had done began to sink in. Overcome with grief, Ethan dropped his weapon as tears streamed down his face. He collapsed to the ground next to Marie, cradling her lifeless body and sobbing.

In that moment, Ethan realized that there was a cost to every action and that decisions made in a split second can have consequences that could never be undone.

Gabriel tilted his head, still cold, still calculating, a stone-cold expression on his face as he responded. "Give me one reason why I shouldn't blow your brains out right now".

Ethan paused, desperately thinking of a reason why Gabriel shouldn't kill him. It's so hard to think straight when you're about to die.

Finally, he said, "Because... because... I can still be useful. I can learn from my mistakes, and do a better job in the future. Please don't punish me for one mistake when I'm still so young and inexperienced."

A tear trickled down Ethan's cheek. He was begging for his life, and he knew it.

"I'm not going to kill you," he said at last. "Not yet at least."

Ethan felt a sense of relief flood through him. For once, he wasn't afraid for his life.

"Why?" He croaked.

Ethan's mind was blank. He stared aimlessly, unable to grasp anything around him. Nothing made sense.

He felt detached from life. Nothing seemed to matter anymore. He wanted to sink into a dark, deep hole and never come out again.

He had failed. Failed Marie. Failed himself. Failed his mission. He was a failure. A coward. A disgrace to everyone who had ever depended on him.

How could he pick up the pieces again? How could he live with himself? How could he look anyone in the eye again knowing what he had done?

"Why wouldn't you kill me?"

Gabriel didn't reply immediately. Instead, he studied the young agent intently, taking in every detail of his face and expression. After a moment, he finally spoke.

"You're a good agent, Ethan." Ethan blinked in surprise at Gabriel's words.

"But you have a lot to learn."

"You showed compassion, and you took responsibility for your failure."

Gabriel nodded. "I believe there is something more important than a successful mission to prove yourself."

"You also need to learn to separate your personal feelings from your job. What happened tonight was a tragedy, but in this line of work, you can't always be emotionally attached to the persons you're assigned to."

Ethan took a deep breath and nodded. "I understand. I will do better." Ethan said, his words a desperate attempt to convince his mentor.

"Good. Now, let's start over, ok? From the beginning." Gabriel extended his hand to help Ethan up.

Ethan accepted the offer, still in shock from the trauma.

"I'm ready."

Gabriel nodded. "Let's start over. From the beginning."From the beginning..." Ethan whispered. He took a deep breath and looked over at Marie's body, lying still and lifeless on the ground, the image forever etched into his mind.

As Ethan stared at Marie's lifeless body, a wave of emptiness washed over him. He felt numb, unable to process the reality of what had just transpired. Even in the midst of his shock and grief, he couldn't help but feel a flicker of resentment towards Gabriel. Why did he have to be so cold and calculating? Ethan knew that Gabriel was right - he was a good agent, and he needed to learn how to separate his emotions from his job. But at that moment, all Ethan wanted was to be left alone in his sorrow.

Ethan was shaken to his core. He couldn't believe he was still alive after everything that had just happened. The weight of his guilt and shame was too much for him, and the tears that had been streaming down his face finally stopped. Ethan took a moment to compose himself before taking Gabriel's hand and getting back on his feet. He turned to look at Marie's lifeless body once more, and at that moment he felt something. A wave of emptiness, a void he had never experienced before. How was this possible? He had always thought that in moments like these, he would feel sadness and grief.

But in that moment he felt nothing…absolutely nothing.

———

"Okay, we'll start with a simple recon mission," Gabriel's voice jolted Ethan out of his daydreaming.

"We need to survey a property in town, and get some intelligence on whoever's living there."

"Yes, sir," Ethan responded, snapping to attention.

"Just make sure to keep those personal attachments out of it," Gabriel commanded, his face blank again.

Ethan swallowed, hearing the obvious subtle warning in Gabriel's voice. He had to keep his emotions in check and keep his personal feelings from seeping out.

"You'll do just fine if you keep it up," Gabriel concluded.

"You've come a long way, Ethan." Gabriel's cold, calculating expression was replaced by a small hint of a smirk as he praised Ethan on his progress.

Ethan couldn't help but feel proud of himself and the progress he'd made in his career.

But Gabriel knew better than to let Ethan get carried away with this confidence.

"Don't let it get to your head, Ethan," he warned with a serious expression on his face. "Stay focused on the mission."

"I will, sir," Ethan responded, his pride replaced by determination once more.

From then onwards Ethan had a newfound determination, a fire burning inside him to prove that he was a good agent. He worked harder than ever before, making sure not to get involved with the targets emotionally.

He took on every job, however difficult it may seem, and always got the job done. Over time, Gabriel started to notice Ethan's dedication and recognized him as a valuable asset to have.

Ethan's confidence and self-belief grew, and he became known for his efficiency and thorough work. He never let himself get attached to anyone again, instead, he focused on getting the job done.

Ethan's confidence only grew when he received a letter of resignation from Gabriel, who noted Ethan's improvement:

Good work Ethan, but there's still room for improvement. Even with your emotional distance, there may be instances where your attachment to the target is still present. In those situations, it's important to prioritize the mission objectives and focus on the task at hand. Remember, your primary task is to gather intelligence and extract the target. Do not get too attached to the target and make sure to keep your emotions in check throughout the mission and complete your job quickly.

And Ethan...don't forget to stay focused and diligent

- Gabriel*