"We'll get everything settled in our rooms at the hotel, if you three want to head to the precinct and touch base with Hotch."
Erin gave Agent Morgan a tight smile as she nodded, feeling like there was an enormous rock in the pit of her stomach. She knew that it was beyond the pale for her to still be keeping the fact that she knew who was after her, and using the team as collateral damage, but she still didn't know how to tell everyone without being looked at as a fool. Glancing up at her husband, she blinked a few times before allowing him to take hold of her hand and leading her and Alex over to the other SUV. "Alex and I are going to sit in the back while you drive, darling. I have the feeling that I need to decompress a little before we get there."
"Of course, stellina." He leaned in and kissed her forehead lightly before getting behind the wheel. Alex opened the back door for them, and Erin clambered in, sliding over to the other side of the vehicle before fastening her seatbelt. As soon as Alex was in, David turned the car on and then began what promised to be a long drive to where Aaron was, since there was never a slow moment in New York City.
She jumped a little when she felt Alex's hand brush against her own, and Erin turned her head slowly to look at her, feeling like she was about to cry at any moment. "Hey, everything is going to be okay. This is what everything was building to, after all. Though I have to ask, why does no one else on the team know that it's John who's behind all this?"
"Because I haven't told anyone besides Penelope, and even then, I swore her to silence, because I didn't want him focusing on one of them, if he knew that we knew what he was doing. I suppose that that time is now over, and everything has to come to light."
Alex nodded as she took hold of her hand, squeezing it softly. "I'll try to be a buffer between the others and you, but I make no promises. I just wish that we had thought to read the others into this situation. Perhaps we could have caught John sooner."
"I think about that every day, and I feel like I'm being torn in two. Because I know that I would have been devastated if John had hurt anyone else on the team because of me." Alex's hold on her hand tightened as they fell silent, and Erin was grateful for the touch to hold her to the present as her husband continued to drive. At some point, she must have fallen asleep, because the next thing she knew, they were parking, and Alex was shaking her shoulder to wake her up.
"All right, let's head inside." She met David's eyes in the rearview mirror and gave him a small nod before unbuckling her belt and getting out of the car. Erin wasn't surprised when Alex and David flanked her, guiding her into the building so as to protect her. Still, she found herself choking up a little as David asked for Aaron. A kind officer led them back to a conference room, and the moment that the door closed behind the three of them, she stepped forward, the tears starting to roll down her cheeks as she stared at him.
"Aaron, I am so sorry. I know, I should have told the team earlier about the fact that I know who's after me, but I was just so afraid that he would do something like this. And that still happened. I just…"
Her words were choked out by her tears, and then Aaron was springing to his feet and wrapping her up in a tight hug. "You were trying to protect us all in your own way. You didn't want to throw anyone else under the bus, am I right?" She nodded against his chest, not caring that Alex was watching this tableau play out. "It was noble of you, and I know that the others will be hard pressed to understand, especially since Sean is now involved. But you did what you had to do to protect your family and friends."
"Why doesn't that assuage my current guilt?"
"Because you've been carrying this secret for way too long. But now everything has come to a head, and we need to leave the secrets behind, no matter what the consequences might be." Aaron kissed the side of her head before leading her over to the table. She sank down into a chair and buried her face in her hands as she heard the others join her around the table. Feeling a large hand on her back, she lifted her head to see that David was next to her, a sad smile on his lips.
"You've been holding this in for so long, Erin. Now it's time for us all to share the burden of this and to hunt John down. I know that this is a huge city, but I also know that he'll be focused on us, which will limit his scope. But our first order of business is going to be convincing the police force that Sean is not the criminal. Since you're so good at politics, I think that you need to be the one that presents the evidence to whoever is in charge, and that Blake should back you up. The pair of you will set up a united front, and be a little less inappropriate than if we were to do so."
She nodded as she took a deep breath, swiping beneath her eyes with one hand as she tried to calm her heart. "I just, I don't know why John decided to choose now to do something like this. I was just starting to get everything on an even keel, and had started the long road to making amends with Lexie, and then John just wants to destroy that?"
"I don't think that we'll ever understand his motivations, unless we take him alive, which I highly doubt will happen." Erin turned her focus to Aaron and gave him a small dip of her head. "If he can't take you out, I have the feeling that he's just too invested in this scenario to just give in. So, we're going to have to be prepared to have no closure at the end of this case. Do you think that you're prepared for that?"
"I have to be, Aaron. Even though I want answers so badly, I have to be all right with never learning just how much he was watching us, and what he learned about the team while he was truly focusing on me. Lexie?"
"Yes, Erin?"
"Promise me, that if anything should happen here, that you'll be the one who calls Jessica so that she can tell the children. I know my darling, he'll be heartbroken and unable to get through making an announcement like that. But you're my pragmatic, bulletproof, friend."
Alex blinked a few times before she nodded, sliding her arm across the table before grabbing Erin's hand. "I hate that you're right about my being able to compartmentalize well, but I will honor your wishes. Now, let's go over with Hotch what's happened so far, in order to present a cohesive case for the detective in charge. I have the feeling that we're going to be here for a little while, so why don't you get us some coffee, Rossi?"
Her husband nodded before getting up, kissing her cheek before he left the room. Erin watched him leave, feeling like her heart was headed out that door as well, and she struggled to keep herself together as they buckled down, Alex taking notes as she and Aaron began to speak.